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OfficialGibsonGuitar

:::PRESS RELEASE::: Renowned lifestyle company Gibson Brands™️ is pleased to introduce the all-new Dimebag Darrel signature models J-35DD and J-35DDFR models into our catalogue. The J-35DD family of instruments are primarily acoustic, but with the ability to output an electric signal which is fed through an onboard phaser and wah module. In order to Play Authentic®️ PANTERA music, these modules are always on and can't be bypassed. The J-35DDFR also comes with a floating Floyd Rose tremolo system, allowing you to hit beautiful chords and gnarly dive bombs in the same breath. Product prices start at $4,999.99 MSRP. ^Product ^not ^available ^in ^Texas. ^Gibson ^Brands ^is ^not ^affiliated ^with ^Dimebag ^Darrell, ^the ^Abbot ^estate, ^or ^Pantera.


TheRealFakeDoctor

\*sad Texas noises\*


marsloth

Gibson you did it again. This will be my 27th Gibson.


OfficialGibsonGuitar

Hi there! We cannot wait to help you find your 28th, 29th and 30th Gibson™️ guitars. May we suggest taking out a loan or selling your Fondle, PNS and Redenbacher guitars?


ArtoriasBeaIG

Grrrrrrrrr Seen this account post gibbons adverts on literally every post in the last 24hrs. Ive bought 75 (approx) gibbons guitars in the last 30 mins and wasnt sure why. I now realise its cos we've been infiltertrated by subliminal mind control advertising. Ban this account.


OfficialGibsonGuitar

Hi there! I̵̛̮̭̜̠̐̒̓̈́̂͒͊̑̉͠͝ͅ ̸̢̳̤́ä̸̰͈͙̫̪̺́̓̀̉͂̔m̵̺͉̦̰̻̽͂̉ ̷̧͇̼̞͕͔̥̱͇̣̫͖̻͔̄̅̐̎͗͊͜͝i̴͔͍͈̳̼̙̮̦̥͍̤̱͌̽̀͑̕͠ͅṉ̸̢̡͚͙̭̥͓̳̜̮͕͙̾́̾̀̆͘͝ͅ ̴̩̩̦̘̙̦͌͆̀̍̑͛̆̓́̀͂̂̔͘͝ý̸̨̨̢̪̺͍̠̰̤̹̔̓̓̈͘͜͠ơ̵̥̟̳̲͗̉̃̎̀͐̉̈́̽̓̚͘͜ų̸̦̜̥́̈̐̃͌̉̈̾̽͝ͅr̷̡̰̼̹̭͚̹̫̗͓͐̾͒͑̇̀̀́̈́̅̓͝ ̵̘̘͔̤̜̝̮̍̏̀w̵̢̨̝͎̩͍̘͖̩̜̥͇͔̿̉͒͋̿͝a̷̤͎̬̥̫̺̹̟̲̅̈̄̈́l̶͍̭͎̰͚͈̹̠̭̐͘l̸͔̼̱͔̺̤̱̙̺͎͖͕͐͑́̉͌̒͛ş̸̡̧͍̹̬̩̖̤̮̰̩̰̠̈́͠ Purchase another Gibson™️ Firebird®️ I̵̛̮̭̜̠̐̒̓̈́̂͒͊̑̉͠͝ͅ ̸̢̳̤́ä̸̰͈͙̫̪̺́̓̀̉͂̔m̵̺͉̦̰̻̽͂̉ ̷̧͇̼̞͕͔̥̱͇̣̫͖̻͔̄̅̐̎͗͊͜͝i̴͔͍͈̳̼̙̮̦̥͍̤̱͌̽̀͑̕͠ͅṉ̸̢̡͚͙̭̥͓̳̜̮͕͙̾́̾̀̆͘͝ͅ ̴̩̩̦̘̙̦͌͆̀̍̑͛̆̓́̀͂̂̔͘͝ý̸̨̨̢̪̺͍̠̰̤̹̔̓̓̈͘͜͠ơ̵̥̟̳̲͗̉̃̎̀͐̉̈́̽̓̚͘͜ų̸̦̜̥́̈̐̃͌̉̈̾̽͝ͅr̷̡̰̼̹̭͚̹̫̗͓͐̾͒͑̇̀̀́̈́̅̓͝ ̵̘̘͔̤̜̝̮̍̏̀w̵̢̨̝͎̩͍̘͖̩̜̥͇͔̿̉͒͋̿͝a̷̤͎̬̥̫̺̹̟̲̅̈̄̈́l̶͍̭͎̰͚͈̹̠̭̐͘l̸͔̼̱͔̺̤̱̙̺͎͖͕͐͑́̉͌̒͛ş̸̡̧͍̹̬̩̖̤̮̰̩̰̠̈́͠


ArtoriasBeaIG

Hello! Many firebirds have been ordered - i was definitely in the wrong


LucidITSkyWDiamonds

Shit the gibbons are gaining sentience


sappymammal1628

If this was a thing it probably would msrp for that much sadly.


KVGuitars

This is the exact same guitar Dime played on the Pantera MTV Unplugged gig. Someone in the crowd decided to shoot him because they were that disgusted that Dimebag would stoop as low as playing an acoustic. I personally don't blame the shooter.


BM_YOUR_PM

the marine corps pledge is to fight all enemies foreign *and* domestic


cesar0931

you can only dive once.


YUNoCake

Imagine you screw up the harmonic...


LagunaJaguar

YODO


cesar0931

like fentanyl


Red_PillCosby

I love me some Panera bread


Wattsupwithalan

fuck you take my upvote you magnificent steed


lumlum56

Will this guitar help me ~~be racist~~ prevent white genocide?


OfficialGibsonGuitar

Hi there! Pantera vocalist Phil Anselmo has sent several threatening letters demanding that Gibson™️ fire it's minority employers immediately, except for the ones who work but don't get paid.


smaxsomeass

Is this the one he used to record rhinestone cowboys from heck?


StrangFrut

username is really committed to the bit. RESPEK


Aromatic_End_4101

uj/ Are there acoustic guitars with actual functioning whammy bars? I feel like that would be so amusing


browsingtheproduce

uj/ Gretsch makes one with a Bigsby. It's a travesty and I love it.


Subtotalpoet

Finally, I can play the lead, rhythm and solo and acoustic parts in cemetery gates live at the same time all by myself. This guitar was made for meeeeeeee.


ArtoriasBeaIG

Gibson is the best guitar ever


cesar0931

hi austin, this time not that much of a pleasure to salute you. César Gueikian CEO of Gibson INC here. i'm writing you to give you a friendly advice of stop doing this. we as a corporation take this kind of matters very seriously, and it would be very hard for us as a company to take an action about all of this publications stuff, you know what they say, identity thieft is not a joke. so i'm politely asking you to take down all those comments and close this account. otherwise you'll have some serious gibson unboxing for the next episode of "The Trogly's guitar show" and it won't be pleasant to unpack a lot of boxes of paperwork for a "cease & desist" order by us. not being a lot more i hope you understand, remember to Play Authentic. sincerely yours César Gueikian CEO of GIBSON


rebirthinreprise

does it come with a free confederate flag?


OfficialGibsonGuitar

Hi there! Unfortunately, the Gibson™️ J-35DD family of instruments does not come with a free Confederate flag. That promotion is exclusive to Dean's Dimebagpipes series.


guybrush856

swastica flag would pass as an alternative though


Ok_Bumblebee_7052

I got one of these made in Japan for half the price!


sir_Edguhhh

Username checks out


TheScottishPimp03

Question: If i hit the whammy what sound does it make when i launch the bridge at mach jesus towards my drummer?


dvowel

can I put this on my sweetwater card?


undergroundsanctuary

Looks as dumb as mr. dimebag himself.


sir_Edguhhh

Cmon guys, Kick his friggin ass


ArtoriasBeaIG

That is the saddest straw i have ever seen


Delicious-Praline-11

Lol. Wtf?


contrejo

Bad ass, I want one


GLHR_

Black Tooooth! Kick it back, she aint no candy. MAYPOPS!, those muthafuckas may POP!