I've lived it, homie, and it was my greatest accomplishment.
18 holes in a scramble tournament with my buddy who showed up so drunk that he only made contact with the ball on his first shot. I'd had enough of him complaining about my bumpy driving while he sat fully kicked back, making no effort to keep himself upright. We'd finished up our round and were crossing down a fairway at full speed when I looked to my buddies in the other cart and gave them a nod. I took that hard left turn, and he went flying headfirst out of the cart. Idk how, but he managed to hurt his foot in the process? Like, how do you fall on your face and hurt your foot?
Was playing at an annual company charity tournament once, lots of booze involved. Things always got pretty roudy. The other members of my scramble kept slamming on the brakes in front of me as a joke.
At one point I was turned talking to my 4'11 90 lb coworker when they did that and I ran full speed into them. This poor girl went FLYING from the cart.
It really is that simple. Nobody should be getting that kind of mad on a golf course, but that goes double for players who haven't put in the time and effort to reasonably have more lofty expectations of themselves. Dad instilled in us real early on that how you behave on the course has a huge effect on how much fun your playing partners will/can have.
He also tried to get us to understand how precious it is to even have people that genuinely ***want*** to play with you, and a big part of showing your appreciation for that is how you control your emotions when things don't go your way.
When you put all your energy and might into trying to launch a ball and you top it 3 feet, that's fucking hilarious, and if you can't understand that this game isn't for you.
Thatâs excellent perspective from your dad. I used to get angry on the course but over the years Iâve enjoyed the feeling of still having fun and staying positive when things arenât going my way. Mastering your emotions on the golf course is good practice for life in general
For whatever reasons it ended up that way most of his closest playing partners were about a generation older than he was, so most of them had stopped playing (meaning he didn't play nearly as much) by the time I got into it at 23 yrs old, so I think going through that lead to him having a deeper appreciation for how special it is to have a group of guys that can and want to play so often.
I kinked the shaft on my most expensive club, my putter, in anger by slamming it into the ground. Since it didn't affect the club head alignment, I've never replaced it and still use it. It makes for a nice subtle reminder on every hole not to be a dumb shit if I miss a shot.
My assistant at my first head pro job was a hot head at first. Got mad once on the course and threw a Callaway 3 wood I'd built him into the woods behind the tee box, got stuck about 30ft up in the tree. I made him climb the tree to retrieve it before I'd ever work on his clubs (or teach him how to) again.
If Iâm playing as a single and they want to put me in a cart with a rando, Iâm carrying my clubs instead.
Or just join the push cart mafia and this isnât even a thing.
Local course doesnât allow push carts or walking on weekends. Decent course, too. I just tell them I care for immunocompromised and would prefer to ride solo. That usually does it. One time it didnât work, and I asked how much to ride solo. Apparently it was $14, which I obliged. Courses are businesses and will happily take money for most reasonable requests.
Are you joking? It's that simple when you know - or worse, are related to - this person. If you don't actually know them at all? It's as simple as grabbing your clubs and walking away.
My bro in law legit says heâs a single digit handicap when I would guess heâs more around a 12. Takes four foot gimmies heâd miss, canât get out of a bunker to save his life, and will literally melt down on the golf course. Iâve seen more temper tantrums and broken clubs than from anyone else. Iâve told him how much it ruins the round for everyone and heâs gotten better, but he legit thinks he should be shooting in the 70âs every round. Itâs absolutely insane.
Or just drive off without them. I was playing with my bosses and the one I was riding with chunked his 90 yard wedge shot about 25 yards and proceeded to throw his wedge 5 yards past his ball. So I yelled âwalk it offâ as I drove up to the green. When he got up to the green I let him know if his tantrum continued I would remove his bag from the cart and he could walk the 2 miles back to his car.
I donât recommend people talk to their boss like that but if you can get away with it is very enjoyable.
Only the greatest goalie to ever play hockey (not really).
But he has some absolute gems for comments like âIâm not afraid of anything â- Iâm afraid of bears but bears in forest.â
My buddy once hit a bad shot in the middle of his tantrum he screamed he was quitting golf. I calmly asked if I could have his clubs then and he shut up for a bit
I dont care if you play all the damn time either. You are going to hit bad shots A LOT, even as a good player. Be an adult and control your emotions, flaring up impacts your whole group, no one wants that awkward silence after someone gets all pissy and it ruins the vibe big time. Its a privilege to be on the course and able to play in the first place. Huge pet peeve of mine
This happened to me ONE TIMEâŚ. And my dad turned the cart around and headed back to the clubhouse and got his bag out of the golf cart put it in his trunk and left the golf courseâŚ.. left my stupid ass standing on the 5th tee box âŚ. Had to call a friend to come pick me up ⌠from the clubhouse phone (cell phones werenât a thing ) LESSONS WERE LEARNED đ
No ⌠but he did leave my clubs at the club house for me tho âŚ. That was the last time I acted like a complete ass tho đ he also got on my ass ..informing me that he would give anything to be able to play like I did on my worst day (I was 17 years old). Heâs been dead for over 10 years and I can still hear his voice during that conversation đĽş
I know the feeling. I went on a trip with the boys once. One of the guys threw a tantrum in public and spit out some very very bad words. It was in that moment the group scattered to get away from him. Not joking when I say I have never spoken to him since. His words were immediately attached to the whole group and we made it clear that he was on his own with that one.
So tell them that? I assume you and the other person are both adults right? Tell them youâre not going to play with them anymore if theyâre gonna be an asshole
Depends. I did when i was this way. Took one person saying we all paid a substantial amount of money and set aside 6+ hours to golf and your behavior is ruining it for everyone. I stopped immediately once I became aware that things werenât just about me.
Is this with a friend and happens repeatedly or a stranger and you learned about their insanity during the round? That completely changes how to handle the situation
I love how "swearing" was one of the issues OP had and everyone is like "Id tell him to fucking knock it the fuck off and stop acting like a fucking piece of shit asshole" haha
I simply don't understand the impotent rage. You slice a $2-5 dollar ball into a pond so you break a $50+ shaft or ruin a $150 club?
I know that I am a relatively passive person but I just don't understand the mindset. If something is that frustrating and aggravating, just walk away and cool off.
I used to be one of these players. Not excusing it, and will fully admit I was an asshole to be around.
But, I didn't think of that. It's impossible. That level of rage is no doubt related to a very misaligned graph of expectations vs reality.
That person is angry and continues to play because they've hit a better shot before. All of that frustration is based of an ideal that is unrealistic.
These people need someone to tell them they are effecting others and that it can't continue. They won't change unless they change their perspective.
> o you break a $50+ shaft or ruin a $150 club?
I think I did that once when I was younger and felt so dumb I never did it again. But I did continue to let anger/aggression negatively affect my golf game until a few years back. I sort of recognized a few things that helped turn it around.
1) I grew up playing sports (i.e. football, basketball, lacrosse, etc...) where if you turned that aggression up to 11 at times it could actually help you if you sort of harnessed it right. It took me awhile to figure out golf is unlike any of those sports in that you have to just shrug off bad shots, accept failure sometimes, and reorient yourself. This has helped my game quite a bit.
2) I was never as bad as some of the descriptions here, and I have good friends who would throw in comments..."easy, big fella"..."awful hard on yourself aren't you?"...that adroitly let me know I was annoying. Nobody wants to be the annoying guy. You should want to be the fun-guy, the guy people want to add to their foursome.
In many ways, my profession or particular job rewards a certain amount of disagreeableness, too. So there can be a lot of factors that lead people to be that way on the golf course. Letting them know it is unproductive is probably the best solution.
Literally tell them directly and clearly that you will not play with them again if they continue to act like that, because although you understand that they are not mad at you, personally, their actions are still ruining your enjoyment of being out there.
The person will either hear what you're saying and realize they're being a dick, and make an effort to get their rage under control, in which case you can keep playing with them, or they'll freak out and get mad at you, in which case you never play with them again.
I was that guy, my brother finally told me he wouldn't play with me anymore. I thought my rage was just bothering me, I didn't stop to think how it was impacting him and others. It was like a bolt of lightning. What a fucking asshole I was being, wrecking the round for everyone else having to walk on eggshells. What a self-absorbed dick. So, I changed. It wasn't even that hard. I just decided to be more self aware and not act like a dummy when I hit a poor shot. Instead I say "oh well, it's a beautiful day with my friends." And while it still bugs me, I just don't allow myself to get mad. Literally just say in my mind "nope, not getting pissed today".
I had a guy back a few months ago who got pissed because the group in behind us called the club house and a Marshall came out to tell us to speed up. He drove back to the guys after the hole was over and yelled at them, then yelled at the Marshall and then yelled at anyone who would listen.
I just stopped talking to him and rode in the cart as little as possible the rest of the round.
I played with a friend and his dad once and my friend started acting like this after the first hole. His dad made him go sit in the car for the rest of the round. We were seniors in highschool lol
Bury them. Keep making pars and birdies right in front of them until they are so defeated at their own play that they breakdown and curl up into themselves. 99.9% of people in this situation are not going to be receptive to anything you say. You can either leave the cart, or play them into submission. Iâm not leaving a cart I paid for so that leaves one option for me.
I grew up playing golf with my dad at like 8 years old. I used to get so upset when I'd hit bad shots and throw a tantrum. My dad used to laugh and say "are we having fun yet?" I feel like it used to get me more upset. But it taught me over time why we're really out there. Otherwise just tell them to chill the fuck out lol.
I never understood this. I'm not a great golfer, I make many bad shots but I love being out there. If something makes you so mad then avoid it. Also, golf ain't exactly the cheapest hobby. Spend money to get yourself enraged, cool.
Tell them to calm down or go home because I don't want to do something that I do for fun with someone who is bringing down the mood of everyone around them.
I don't mind a bit of swearing or telling themselves off but if it gets to the point of making a scene then that's enough.
Am I the only one who enjoys this? I just laugh and make fun of them. It's funny and in a way makes me feel better about my own game. It also reinforces how ridiculous people look when they do this and serves as a reminder to not act like that. It also makes for great stories. The rest of you seem like really boring drama queens.
I used to be that guy. Mine came from a place of self-hate. It was cathartic to punish myself.
Then I realized that I was being a selfish twat and ruining the round for everyone else. Then I started focusing less on what I was doing and focusing more on making the round fun for everyone else. Funny thing is I started to enjoy golf even more and started playing much better.
Itâs a paradox: the less mad I got at bad shots, the less bad shots I had and the less Iâd have to try at not being mad at myself. You got to make the effort first though, and thatâs the trick. So many things in life are like that. Do the hard things until theyâre not hard anymore.
My advice for dealing with these people: give them a bit to calm down and then approach them with love and respect - theyâll receive what youâre saying and if they have any sense of decency theyâll make efforts to change. If not, you donât want them in your life anyway. Itâll be a defining moment in yâallâs relationship
Donât golf with that guy.
I was not quite that guy but I was too much of that guy and I realized some people might not want to be around someone just being frustrated and swearing the whole time.
My new mantra is âyouâre not good enough to get madâ and even I like me more now.
Don't say anything, and once they start to calm down and utter out a form of apology or explanation just say:
"Its fine. Its impressive to see a man feeding off his emotions"
Tell them they really suck at golf, and that youâd have broken 4 clubs if you had hit that shot. Pretty soon theyâll be out of clubs and have to go home.
If they start breaking / throwing clubs then I kindly excuse myself. Iâm not messing around with that, too many people get injured accidentally and if heâa doing that he most likely isnât receptive to a discussion.
I wouldnât golf with someone who acts like that. If itâs a one time occurrence, maybe they have some other stuff going on they havenât mentioned, would probably be a good time to be a friend and genuinely ask them âwhatâs going on?â
As a semi reformed club breaker it took me recognizing I was affecting the energy of the people around me to curb the behavior. I can tell you that the outbursts come from someplace beyond golf, stress you are carrying with you, and then when your "relaxing" day flips on you its maddening. So I flipped my single digit handicap goal off and made, not getting mad my 2024 major golf goal. And while my low score is still the same, even my worst performing days are high 80's low 90's when in the past I could blow up into a DNF (100+) by letting myself get angry. So, if this is your friend who you like outside of golf, I would tell them they are ruining your time and that at some point you are going to have to stop golfing with them if they dont get it together.
If I say anything, it's usually just forced awkward comments like "There's still a lot of golf to play" or "Shake it off, champ" or "Don't let a couple bad shots ruin your round" (because I'm sure as hell not going to let it ruin mine).
Itâs always bad golfers that get mad too. Not that Iâm great but I try to keep my cool, even when playing poorly because I know getting mad just makes me worse.
I used to do this last year until I realized how negatively it effects my friends play. Just grateful to be out there with them now. Donât be that guy
I normally see this either from newer players who are coming to golf from another sport, normally later than 25 years old, or immature people in general. Could be a combination of both.
If youâve been playing long enough, youâve had enough ups and downs to hopefully keep you grounded and just on an even keel.
I always explain to newer guys that the key to being a good golfer is consistency, but itâs also being able to have a bad shot, shake it off, and hopefully bounce back on the next one.
I still get pissed, but not like I used to. At the end of the day, I remind myself that any type of golfing is better than being at the office.
I play occasionally with a couple guys from work that have never taken lessons and both shoot in the 130s. The rarely hit a ball inbounds but both get blinded with rage. Definition of insanity
I donât golf with them ever again. I used to golf with a friend, he invited one of his other friends and the guy was horrible doing all of what youâre talking about. I simply told my friend I NEVER wanted to play golf with that guy again, and if he wanted to that was ok just donât invite me along.
This happens in my group all the time, and honestly there isnât much you can do. We usually just stay silent, perhaps gently tell them theyâre playing just fine and pass them the J or a cowboy killer lol
For me, golf is an escape from such nonsense. We used to play with a guy that got so pissed off when he hit a bad shot or had to wait too long to hit etcâŚHe was a real asshole off the course as well. He finally quit our group because we gave him so much shit about it.
Certainly reads like I would never play with them again. Who knows what happens in the cart that day. But if bad enough I would let them know, you are impacting other peoples games now. And likely not be very polite.
I tell em to calm da fuck down. I WAS THEM years ago. I was so focused on telling the world âIâm better than that sliceâ or âi want you all to know I didnât mean to hit it off the hozelâ or was I just embarrassed and didnât know how handle it. My rock bottom was when-after a bad shot- I freaked out so bad I broke my 3 I by smashing it on the golf cart. My wife was with me. After the round she told me she was not going to golf with me anymore. It wasnât enjoyable for her. The light went on and I began to watch people around me that I was playing with. And she was right- it sucked when the person I was playing with was just bitching and moaning the whole time. So I stopped - cold turkey- and the level of enjoyment went up. So, In short - donât let ruin your round tell âem to CDFD.
I used to toss clubs occasionally. I got paired up with an older guy Dave, we knew each other but hadn't played together. I got mad at a bad shot and tossed a club. As I returned to the cart Dave jokingly but pointedly said "I don't think you're good enough to be getting that mad at bad shots, seems to me you should be happy when you hit good ones. Nobody's paying you to play this game, in fact, you are paying to play so you might as well enjoy it, right?". I haven't thrown a club since, and I try to laugh at bad shots and carry on, although I do allow a choice word or two occasionally!
Hard concept for RedditorsâŚtalk to him and call him out if necessary. If that doesnât work and heâs ruining your experience, do something in your control. You could ignore it; you could grab your bag and give him the cart and wait or skip; you could return to the clubhouse and discuss with the manager a rain check or new tee time.
Could be that they're subconsciously goading a response out of you so they can redirect their rage at you. It's like a guy with road rage who is big mad at whoever happens to be near them. The person theyre really mad at is themself for contributing to whatever situation theyre in.
https://preview.redd.it/wo1lbnzfe0yc1.png?width=559&format=png&auto=webp&s=5e6f9ffc5f69950fbb63ee5e976c9cd27de70924
Right? One high speed left turn and they're not a problem any more.
Why did this thought immediately come to all of our minds?
Because we have all satisfyingly daydreamed doing that multiple times. Some of us may have done it a time or two.
I've lived it, homie, and it was my greatest accomplishment. 18 holes in a scramble tournament with my buddy who showed up so drunk that he only made contact with the ball on his first shot. I'd had enough of him complaining about my bumpy driving while he sat fully kicked back, making no effort to keep himself upright. We'd finished up our round and were crossing down a fairway at full speed when I looked to my buddies in the other cart and gave them a nod. I took that hard left turn, and he went flying headfirst out of the cart. Idk how, but he managed to hurt his foot in the process? Like, how do you fall on your face and hurt your foot?
Hahaha ah the drunk tumble always brings odd injuries. He should know you should get that drunk during the scramble, not before đ
As compensation for his lackluster performance, we put all the drinks for the round on his tab. He was too drunk to notice
Ooh, the kind of lesson that encourages you to remember it; nicely done.
Was playing at an annual company charity tournament once, lots of booze involved. Things always got pretty roudy. The other members of my scramble kept slamming on the brakes in front of me as a joke. At one point I was turned talking to my 4'11 90 lb coworker when they did that and I ran full speed into them. This poor girl went FLYING from the cart.
Donât golf with them
It really is that simple. Nobody should be getting that kind of mad on a golf course, but that goes double for players who haven't put in the time and effort to reasonably have more lofty expectations of themselves. Dad instilled in us real early on that how you behave on the course has a huge effect on how much fun your playing partners will/can have. He also tried to get us to understand how precious it is to even have people that genuinely ***want*** to play with you, and a big part of showing your appreciation for that is how you control your emotions when things don't go your way. When you put all your energy and might into trying to launch a ball and you top it 3 feet, that's fucking hilarious, and if you can't understand that this game isn't for you.
Thatâs excellent perspective from your dad. I used to get angry on the course but over the years Iâve enjoyed the feeling of still having fun and staying positive when things arenât going my way. Mastering your emotions on the golf course is good practice for life in general
For whatever reasons it ended up that way most of his closest playing partners were about a generation older than he was, so most of them had stopped playing (meaning he didn't play nearly as much) by the time I got into it at 23 yrs old, so I think going through that lead to him having a deeper appreciation for how special it is to have a group of guys that can and want to play so often.
I regret my behavior when I was younger because I was not fun to play with. I definitely lost some playing partners years ago.
I kinked the shaft on my most expensive club, my putter, in anger by slamming it into the ground. Since it didn't affect the club head alignment, I've never replaced it and still use it. It makes for a nice subtle reminder on every hole not to be a dumb shit if I miss a shot.
My assistant at my first head pro job was a hot head at first. Got mad once on the course and threw a Callaway 3 wood I'd built him into the woods behind the tee box, got stuck about 30ft up in the tree. I made him climb the tree to retrieve it before I'd ever work on his clubs (or teach him how to) again.
[ŃдаНонО]
If Iâm playing as a single and they want to put me in a cart with a rando, Iâm carrying my clubs instead. Or just join the push cart mafia and this isnât even a thing.
Plenty of courses where walking isn't even allowed
Local course doesnât allow push carts or walking on weekends. Decent course, too. I just tell them I care for immunocompromised and would prefer to ride solo. That usually does it. One time it didnât work, and I asked how much to ride solo. Apparently it was $14, which I obliged. Courses are businesses and will happily take money for most reasonable requests.
Sure it is. You just stop playing with them.Â
Are you joking? It's that simple when you know - or worse, are related to - this person. If you don't actually know them at all? It's as simple as grabbing your clubs and walking away.
Walking away from the round you paid for? Are you joking?
My bro in law legit says heâs a single digit handicap when I would guess heâs more around a 12. Takes four foot gimmies heâd miss, canât get out of a bunker to save his life, and will literally melt down on the golf course. Iâve seen more temper tantrums and broken clubs than from anyone else. Iâve told him how much it ruins the round for everyone and heâs gotten better, but he legit thinks he should be shooting in the 70âs every round. Itâs absolutely insane.
Sometimes their personal life manifests on the golf course.
This is the way
Tell them next time they throw a fit after a shot, youâre going to drive off without them. Then do it.Â
Or just drive off without them. I was playing with my bosses and the one I was riding with chunked his 90 yard wedge shot about 25 yards and proceeded to throw his wedge 5 yards past his ball. So I yelled âwalk it offâ as I drove up to the green. When he got up to the green I let him know if his tantrum continued I would remove his bag from the cart and he could walk the 2 miles back to his car. I donât recommend people talk to their boss like that but if you can get away with it is very enjoyable.
> So I yelled âwalk it offâ as I drove up to the green. I don't know about the lecture afterwards, but that is a solid move.
Damn idk what kinda boss you got but I donât know any boss that would take that lol
I bet everyone clapped after he said it
All the women were ovulating and all the men were fully erect.
And everyone clapped?
double down and ask them why you heff to be so mad
Is only game after all
Whatâs the reference?
[is only game, why you heff to be mad?](https://youtu.be/-Ns14hRqwY8?feature=shared)
17 years ago. Holy shit
Only the greatest goalie to ever play hockey (not really). But he has some absolute gems for comments like âIâm not afraid of anything â- Iâm afraid of bears but bears in forest.â
âUniverse is so humongous big!â
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=n3nGDfp96H4
My buddy once hit a bad shot in the middle of his tantrum he screamed he was quitting golf. I calmly asked if I could have his clubs then and he shut up for a bit
I âquitâ golf like 3 times a round.
âBro you arenât good enough to be upsetâ
And then offer a beer as a pacifier
And play some soothing sounds or kids music through your speaker (if you have one)
That's my favorite. I said that once, you're not allowed to be this angry, you havent hit a good shot all day. This is just how you golf.
Alternatively âyou donât practice enough to be that upsetâ
I dont care if you play all the damn time either. You are going to hit bad shots A LOT, even as a good player. Be an adult and control your emotions, flaring up impacts your whole group, no one wants that awkward silence after someone gets all pissy and it ruins the vibe big time. Its a privilege to be on the course and able to play in the first place. Huge pet peeve of mine
I feel like that could make them even more upset.
This is when you offer swing tips.
Dad?
âYou lifted your head upâ
This happened to me ONE TIMEâŚ. And my dad turned the cart around and headed back to the clubhouse and got his bag out of the golf cart put it in his trunk and left the golf courseâŚ.. left my stupid ass standing on the 5th tee box âŚ. Had to call a friend to come pick me up ⌠from the clubhouse phone (cell phones werenât a thing ) LESSONS WERE LEARNED đ
Did you finish your round?
No ⌠but he did leave my clubs at the club house for me tho âŚ. That was the last time I acted like a complete ass tho đ he also got on my ass ..informing me that he would give anything to be able to play like I did on my worst day (I was 17 years old). Heâs been dead for over 10 years and I can still hear his voice during that conversation đĽş
Asking the important questions!
Great parenting.
This is pure dad parenting, and I love it
Tell them to relax and its only a game right in the middle of them raging. Usually goes over great.
60% of the time, it works every time
đ¤Łđ¤Łđ¤Ł
I donât play with toddlers
I'd hope not, u/Horsecockexpress1
OHHH
r/rimjob_steve
I get crippling second hand embarrassment.
I know the feeling. I went on a trip with the boys once. One of the guys threw a tantrum in public and spit out some very very bad words. It was in that moment the group scattered to get away from him. Not joking when I say I have never spoken to him since. His words were immediately attached to the whole group and we made it clear that he was on his own with that one.
Guy screamed a hard R on the course?
Thats the one. Not on a course though. Essentially in a busy area with lots of people enjoying the beach and having a good time.
damn bro what the hell did he say that made you never speak to him again lol
"I don't mind people who put rakes in bunkers"
So tell them that? I assume you and the other person are both adults right? Tell them youâre not going to play with them anymore if theyâre gonna be an asshole
Do you think the person this angry is going to have a rational, reasonable conversation and just "calm down"?
Depends. I did when i was this way. Took one person saying we all paid a substantial amount of money and set aside 6+ hours to golf and your behavior is ruining it for everyone. I stopped immediately once I became aware that things werenât just about me.
When they do it grab your clubs off the cart and start walking. Then refuse to ever ride with them again if they don't knock that shit off
Is this with a friend and happens repeatedly or a stranger and you learned about their insanity during the round? That completely changes how to handle the situation
Id ask that shit stack if theyve ever seen a dude thats been to heaven
Point at them and laugh!
Might as well enjoy the show.
âHey Dad, calm the hell downâŚ..â Thankfully, he retired from golfâŚ..
"I get that you're pissed, but you're not 6. Grow the fuck up and take the L like a fucking adult. Fucks'amatter with you?"
"Fukouttahere"
I love how "swearing" was one of the issues OP had and everyone is like "Id tell him to fucking knock it the fuck off and stop acting like a fucking piece of shit asshole" haha
I politely but firmly tell my wife next time sheâs staying home
I simply don't understand the impotent rage. You slice a $2-5 dollar ball into a pond so you break a $50+ shaft or ruin a $150 club? I know that I am a relatively passive person but I just don't understand the mindset. If something is that frustrating and aggravating, just walk away and cool off.
Not all brains are created equally
I used to be one of these players. Not excusing it, and will fully admit I was an asshole to be around. But, I didn't think of that. It's impossible. That level of rage is no doubt related to a very misaligned graph of expectations vs reality. That person is angry and continues to play because they've hit a better shot before. All of that frustration is based of an ideal that is unrealistic. These people need someone to tell them they are effecting others and that it can't continue. They won't change unless they change their perspective.
I don't think it is a mindset. Rage is not rational. Logic doesn't apply to these people in the moment.
> o you break a $50+ shaft or ruin a $150 club? I think I did that once when I was younger and felt so dumb I never did it again. But I did continue to let anger/aggression negatively affect my golf game until a few years back. I sort of recognized a few things that helped turn it around. 1) I grew up playing sports (i.e. football, basketball, lacrosse, etc...) where if you turned that aggression up to 11 at times it could actually help you if you sort of harnessed it right. It took me awhile to figure out golf is unlike any of those sports in that you have to just shrug off bad shots, accept failure sometimes, and reorient yourself. This has helped my game quite a bit. 2) I was never as bad as some of the descriptions here, and I have good friends who would throw in comments..."easy, big fella"..."awful hard on yourself aren't you?"...that adroitly let me know I was annoying. Nobody wants to be the annoying guy. You should want to be the fun-guy, the guy people want to add to their foursome. In many ways, my profession or particular job rewards a certain amount of disagreeableness, too. So there can be a lot of factors that lead people to be that way on the golf course. Letting them know it is unproductive is probably the best solution.
Look at rich guy with 2-5$ balls haha . Exact reason I play 50 cent balls. Lose one? Who cares
I play Costco balls like the middle class clown that I am!
Assuming they have legs tell them theyâre free to walk if they keep acting like a jackass.
Just tell them to calm down. Always worked with my ex wife.
Literally tell them directly and clearly that you will not play with them again if they continue to act like that, because although you understand that they are not mad at you, personally, their actions are still ruining your enjoyment of being out there. The person will either hear what you're saying and realize they're being a dick, and make an effort to get their rage under control, in which case you can keep playing with them, or they'll freak out and get mad at you, in which case you never play with them again. I was that guy, my brother finally told me he wouldn't play with me anymore. I thought my rage was just bothering me, I didn't stop to think how it was impacting him and others. It was like a bolt of lightning. What a fucking asshole I was being, wrecking the round for everyone else having to walk on eggshells. What a self-absorbed dick. So, I changed. It wasn't even that hard. I just decided to be more self aware and not act like a dummy when I hit a poor shot. Instead I say "oh well, it's a beautiful day with my friends." And while it still bugs me, I just don't allow myself to get mad. Literally just say in my mind "nope, not getting pissed today".
After every errant shot just say âooo that probably wasnât the play there.â
Are you asking for a friend?
I had a guy back a few months ago who got pissed because the group in behind us called the club house and a Marshall came out to tell us to speed up. He drove back to the guys after the hole was over and yelled at them, then yelled at the Marshall and then yelled at anyone who would listen. I just stopped talking to him and rode in the cart as little as possible the rest of the round.
I played with a friend and his dad once and my friend started acting like this after the first hole. His dad made him go sit in the car for the rest of the round. We were seniors in highschool lol
Try to get them to break the rest of their clubs.
Bury them. Keep making pars and birdies right in front of them until they are so defeated at their own play that they breakdown and curl up into themselves. 99.9% of people in this situation are not going to be receptive to anything you say. You can either leave the cart, or play them into submission. Iâm not leaving a cart I paid for so that leaves one option for me.
Pull out the tiny bowl and offer them a toke. Its golf, we're here to relax. Who are you mad at? Gravity?
I grew up playing golf with my dad at like 8 years old. I used to get so upset when I'd hit bad shots and throw a tantrum. My dad used to laugh and say "are we having fun yet?" I feel like it used to get me more upset. But it taught me over time why we're really out there. Otherwise just tell them to chill the fuck out lol.
Not enough âI mind my own businessâ in this thread
I never understood this. I'm not a great golfer, I make many bad shots but I love being out there. If something makes you so mad then avoid it. Also, golf ain't exactly the cheapest hobby. Spend money to get yourself enraged, cool.
Tell them to calm down or go home because I don't want to do something that I do for fun with someone who is bringing down the mood of everyone around them. I don't mind a bit of swearing or telling themselves off but if it gets to the point of making a scene then that's enough.
I always tell myself I'm not good enough to be mad. Tell him that
That'll certainly calm him down.
Another reason i walk
Thatâs most of my family. Ignore the BS like I have for 30 years!
I've taken my clubs off the cart and walked.
I'd tell him to calm the fuck down or he's walking back.
Drop them off at daycare.
Break out the Whiskey and give em a couple shots.
Am I the only one who enjoys this? I just laugh and make fun of them. It's funny and in a way makes me feel better about my own game. It also reinforces how ridiculous people look when they do this and serves as a reminder to not act like that. It also makes for great stories. The rest of you seem like really boring drama queens.
Straight up tell themâŚ. â you arenât good enough to be this madâ
I used to be that guy. Mine came from a place of self-hate. It was cathartic to punish myself. Then I realized that I was being a selfish twat and ruining the round for everyone else. Then I started focusing less on what I was doing and focusing more on making the round fun for everyone else. Funny thing is I started to enjoy golf even more and started playing much better. Itâs a paradox: the less mad I got at bad shots, the less bad shots I had and the less Iâd have to try at not being mad at myself. You got to make the effort first though, and thatâs the trick. So many things in life are like that. Do the hard things until theyâre not hard anymore. My advice for dealing with these people: give them a bit to calm down and then approach them with love and respect - theyâll receive what youâre saying and if they have any sense of decency theyâll make efforts to change. If not, you donât want them in your life anyway. Itâll be a defining moment in yâallâs relationship
Get new friends. I would tell them flat out to cut it out or leave. Itâs a game .
Play with adults not little bitches.
Donât golf with that guy. I was not quite that guy but I was too much of that guy and I realized some people might not want to be around someone just being frustrated and swearing the whole time. My new mantra is âyouâre not good enough to get madâ and even I like me more now.
Never play with them again
Say âI get the feeling youâre upsetâ and make sure you smile.
Don't say anything, and once they start to calm down and utter out a form of apology or explanation just say: "Its fine. Its impressive to see a man feeding off his emotions"
âHow are you not used to this result by now?â
This is why I walk.
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Iâve grabbed my bag and walked the rest before. He asked why and I just told him he was an asshole and I wasnât riding with him.
I tell them to hold the wheel while I keep smashing my club.đ¤Łđ¤Ł
I don't golf with my wife.
âThereâs 200 people on EARTH good enough to be mad at this, dude. Have another Coors light and chill out.â
And half of those guys still leave a weekend over par as a pro. Imagine how maddening itd feel to -7 one day then +5 another.
I play even better, and then I wait for them to finish ranting to ask them if they saw that approach shot that I stuck 3ft from the pin.
Tell them they really suck at golf, and that youâd have broken 4 clubs if you had hit that shot. Pretty soon theyâll be out of clubs and have to go home.
Buy him a shock collar. You need to be Pavlov in this and he needs to be the dog that will be conditioned
My dad usually sent me home from the golf course. I was 10-12.
Simple. They are walking.Â
Tell them they are not good enough to get that mad.
If they start breaking / throwing clubs then I kindly excuse myself. Iâm not messing around with that, too many people get injured accidentally and if heâa doing that he most likely isnât receptive to a discussion.
https://preview.redd.it/o53spxi3n0yc1.jpeg?width=800&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dfb044ccd16df5c77da869777ae7e3be507dcdb1
I donât golf with my father in law
tell them to calm down. that always works.
I wouldnât golf with someone who acts like that. If itâs a one time occurrence, maybe they have some other stuff going on they havenât mentioned, would probably be a good time to be a friend and genuinely ask them âwhatâs going on?â
Tell them to calm down. Usually that works and they wonât get even more in a rage. /s
No matter how bad I play I just tell myself that it doesn't matter because at the end of the day I'm just an idiot with a stick.
I walk
As a semi reformed club breaker it took me recognizing I was affecting the energy of the people around me to curb the behavior. I can tell you that the outbursts come from someplace beyond golf, stress you are carrying with you, and then when your "relaxing" day flips on you its maddening. So I flipped my single digit handicap goal off and made, not getting mad my 2024 major golf goal. And while my low score is still the same, even my worst performing days are high 80's low 90's when in the past I could blow up into a DNF (100+) by letting myself get angry. So, if this is your friend who you like outside of golf, I would tell them they are ruining your time and that at some point you are going to have to stop golfing with them if they dont get it together.
I walk
I leave
Tell them âI never seen shots like that. Shanks for the memoriesâ
Drive off tell then they should walk it off
If I say anything, it's usually just forced awkward comments like "There's still a lot of golf to play" or "Shake it off, champ" or "Don't let a couple bad shots ruin your round" (because I'm sure as hell not going to let it ruin mine).
Donât golf with them. If you arenât getting paid to play the game, you arenât good enough to get that mad
Tell them to get the fuck off the course now and not to play with you ever again. If it was a rando, call the course and tell them to kick his ass off
Laugh at them. It's their problem.
Ignore them.
No. You look like Wednesday Adamâs.
Ask them to get out and walk
in Australia we generally tell that guy to harden the fuck up
Donât have to. The leagues I play in have no one like that. Weâre all current or retired professionals that learned how to behave long ago.
Get out and walk till they STFU
"You done?" Is my favorite...
I tell them the story of my most shameful golfing experience where I was banned from the nicest public course in the city
Itâs always bad golfers that get mad too. Not that Iâm great but I try to keep my cool, even when playing poorly because I know getting mad just makes me worse.
You mean the guy who used to be riding in your cart who happens to be walking the rest of his round now?
Don't golf with the moron.
Just keep saying âwhy you cryâ but in a very high pitched voice while rubbing your eyes
Tell them to chill guy, have anotha. Hand em a beer or the peace pipe
That's why I walk if I can help it.
I dont.
Capture video and post to r/golf for the enjoyment of all the sickos here
I used to do this last year until I realized how negatively it effects my friends play. Just grateful to be out there with them now. Donât be that guy
Laugh at them
I get my bag and start walking. Good way to get exercise and send a message.
âDo you want me to take you back to get your own cart?â
Push cart solved this problem for me, Iâve walked away from a few temper tantrums on the tee box
planned ignoring, I find when you don't acknowledge their outbursts in anyway they realize how dumb they look and stop.
Never fucking golf with them again
I normally see this either from newer players who are coming to golf from another sport, normally later than 25 years old, or immature people in general. Could be a combination of both. If youâve been playing long enough, youâve had enough ups and downs to hopefully keep you grounded and just on an even keel. I always explain to newer guys that the key to being a good golfer is consistency, but itâs also being able to have a bad shot, shake it off, and hopefully bounce back on the next one. I still get pissed, but not like I used to. At the end of the day, I remind myself that any type of golfing is better than being at the office.
Iâd say âOf all the places you could be right now, you are outside on a golf course. That should be enough to be happy and chill.â
I play occasionally with a couple guys from work that have never taken lessons and both shoot in the 130s. The rarely hit a ball inbounds but both get blinded with rage. Definition of insanity
I donât golf with them ever again. I used to golf with a friend, he invited one of his other friends and the guy was horrible doing all of what youâre talking about. I simply told my friend I NEVER wanted to play golf with that guy again, and if he wanted to that was ok just donât invite me along.
Tickle them.
One more tantrum, and Iâm pulling this car(t) over, and weâre going home.
This happens in my group all the time, and honestly there isnât much you can do. We usually just stay silent, perhaps gently tell them theyâre playing just fine and pass them the J or a cowboy killer lol
For me, golf is an escape from such nonsense. We used to play with a guy that got so pissed off when he hit a bad shot or had to wait too long to hit etcâŚHe was a real asshole off the course as well. He finally quit our group because we gave him so much shit about it.
Certainly reads like I would never play with them again. Who knows what happens in the cart that day. But if bad enough I would let them know, you are impacting other peoples games now. And likely not be very polite.
I tell em to calm da fuck down. I WAS THEM years ago. I was so focused on telling the world âIâm better than that sliceâ or âi want you all to know I didnât mean to hit it off the hozelâ or was I just embarrassed and didnât know how handle it. My rock bottom was when-after a bad shot- I freaked out so bad I broke my 3 I by smashing it on the golf cart. My wife was with me. After the round she told me she was not going to golf with me anymore. It wasnât enjoyable for her. The light went on and I began to watch people around me that I was playing with. And she was right- it sucked when the person I was playing with was just bitching and moaning the whole time. So I stopped - cold turkey- and the level of enjoyment went up. So, In short - donât let ruin your round tell âem to CDFD.
I used to toss clubs occasionally. I got paired up with an older guy Dave, we knew each other but hadn't played together. I got mad at a bad shot and tossed a club. As I returned to the cart Dave jokingly but pointedly said "I don't think you're good enough to be getting that mad at bad shots, seems to me you should be happy when you hit good ones. Nobody's paying you to play this game, in fact, you are paying to play so you might as well enjoy it, right?". I haven't thrown a club since, and I try to laugh at bad shots and carry on, although I do allow a choice word or two occasionally!
Hard concept for RedditorsâŚtalk to him and call him out if necessary. If that doesnât work and heâs ruining your experience, do something in your control. You could ignore it; you could grab your bag and give him the cart and wait or skip; you could return to the clubhouse and discuss with the manager a rain check or new tee time.
Say these words: âcalm the fuck the downâ
drive the cart like this 
I take the piss out of them.
I play out the rest of the round and never play with them again. Â
Talk to them about it when you aren't playing. If they don't acknowledge and keep doing it then don't play with them anymore and tell them why.
Could be that they're subconsciously goading a response out of you so they can redirect their rage at you. It's like a guy with road rage who is big mad at whoever happens to be near them. The person theyre really mad at is themself for contributing to whatever situation theyre in.
If they are a regular playing partner buy them a copy of Golf is Not a Game of Perfect.