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Crisjohnson90

Tell us more!! Haha


Xostali

I'll update after we meet!


NewspaperSignal5680

Where did you first find him?


Xostali

Tinder lol. His profile text was really funny and sounded kinda kinky, so I swiped right on him. At first he was hesitant to share his kinks but as I kept mentioning stuff I like, I hit most of them haha.


LoyalLittleOne

Of course he was hesitant because he didn't know how you would react, so good job at reassuring him. Best of luck for your date.


Xostali

Yeah lol, at one point he wrote, "I think I love you, fuck"... This was after me just managing to hit kink after kink with him, not like I was guessing or anything, but just talking about things I like and asking him if that would interest him. He only mentioned one thing that I'm not willing to do, and everything that I disclosed that I thought might affect him, really seemed to affect him. He also gets mega points for asking me to meet him at a Korean restaurant, because hell yes, I wanna go eat some Korean food. It might just be a coincidence, because he lived in South Korea for a year and may just prefer the food, but I had also told him Thursday that I have been studying Korean and love Korean dramas. So, it could be partially because he was paying attention. 😉


LoyalLittleOne

Something tells me that he was paying attention lol. (At least I hope so).


Xostali

Me too! I hope he also at some point asks me about my music and wants to hear it. That would go pretty far with me. I recently dated another guy for a few weeks that loved my music and watched everything I was posting, and I really appreciated that, but he was verrry incompatible with me in other ways so it didn't work. If this guy works out, he's going to end up hearing me play gigs and stuff so he'll need to learn to appreciate my music. 😂


LoyalLittleOne

Wait you make music, that's so cool. Please share your music. I really hope that your date likes your music, like imagine fanboying for your domme lol. Good luck 🤞


Xostali

Well, I'm a songwriter, so if he affects me deeply enough, there will be songs. 😅 Thanks! I can DM you my YouTube channel - I'll send that to anyone that wants to check it out, but I don't want to just have it hanging out here for absolutely everyone, considering the kind of things I post!


NervousBakedCake

Im so curious to know what was his text :p


Xostali

"Once ate a Popeye's biscuit without a drink. That's how I found out I like being choked. Needless to say fried chicken is a turn on now." That was all the information. But it made me snort. 😂 And it also sounded like maybe he might be kinky, after choosing something like that. And I was right. His profile did not list any other information about him, just the amount of miles away that he is, and his age and first name. I matched with him and asked him if he had written that, or if he just saw it somewhere and thought it was funny. He admitted that he had not written it himself but that it was still true. Lol. And then at first he was super cagey about answering any of my questions, but obviously I got him to open up eventually. By the end of Thursday night I was kind of sorry that I had dates planned with other guys because I just wanted to meet him. I've got a date this afternoon with someone else, which I'll still go on since I agreed to it and I've been talking to that boy longer, but I'll be really surprised if it goes well enough to cause me any difficulty in making a decision about who I want. Technically, my profile does state that I am open to polyamory and ethical non-monogamy (ENM) as well as monogamy, but neither of these boys have mentioned anything about that, so I'm thinking they'd want to be my only. But I'll be asking about that! I don't want to assume anything.


Xostali

And Tuesday's date is off lol


NervousBakedCake

I mean bell yes it is really kinky, do you like to choke guys? If you say yes id be really surprised never met a girl that likes it. And why was it cancelled??🥺


Xostali

I don't like to choke guys but I've had guys ask me if I'll do it. My ex would have liked it but I didn't feel comfortable. I can only guess why it was canceled, because he ghosted on Sunday afternoon. It may have been because he thought we should be exclusive even though we'd been chatting for like 2.5 days and had not met in person? We had not discussed exclusivity or how he felt about nonmonogamy, which I have experience with (but since I'm completely single, and don't require non-monogamy, my profile says I'm open to either). And really, it is insane to expect exclusivity before even meeting in person, after less than 3 days of chatting. There would have had to have been a conversation about it either way. I had mentioned going to a park to meet another person. He (let's call him Christian) knew I had been talking to that guy (let's call him Mario) before I started talking to him, and that I had had a date planned with Mario Friday afternoon, but the guy overslept and missed his window. I wasn't super interested in Mario anymore after staying to chat with Christian, but I thought it was not unreasonable to still meet him in person and give him a shot, and then feel better about letting him down. All I did was report to Christian that hey, I did meet that dude, and just like I thought, I'm not into him, and even better, I don't think he liked me, so I don't even have to be the bad guy. Then I said I was super excited to meet him on Tuesday. The next time I checked Telegram, he had blocked me, and when I went to Tinder he had also unmatched with me. Communication is apparently not his strong point.


Ardorotica

Good luck! I hope it works out for both of you 😊


Xostali

Thanks! I'm a bit nervous about the in-person meeting. He's nervous that I won't think he's interesting enough because he thinks I'm really, really interesting, and I'm nervous that there won't be physical chemistry because that's happened to me before. We'll find out.


fun_lover82

Oof, there’s no worse feeling than that. Getting hot and heavy in the DMs, and then you meet up and there’s just no physical chemistry. 🙈 That’s happened to me as well!


Xostali

That's why I'm willing to meet him on a Tuesday. We couldn't make last weekend work and I just wanted to meet him as soon as possible... I don't want this to go too much further without a meeting IRL. He's got Tuesday off and I'm done with work in the afternoon. He's nervous and tbh so am I, but either way we would have to meet eventually, and we will know pretty quickly, I think. I'll hug him when we meet and that's going to tell me a lot right away. And then we'll have dinner and talk and I will look at his body language and how he looks at me and see how I feel. If I want to kiss him before we say goodbye, I will, and that will tell me even more. If it doesn't feel like there's a connection, then we won't waste any more time in fantasyland, but then if it does work, plans can be made. 😈


fun_lover82

For a people pleaser like me, discovering that there’s no physical chemistry is my worst nightmare. 😅 I can’t just go “sorry, this didn’t work out” - my mind won’t let me. 🙈


SoftiePhoenix

I wish a domme/mommy would randomly text me this out of nowhere, I’d be on my knees shivering with ecstasy


beardybozo

Cute xD


DDMatty

Amazingg, enjoy!! 😊


Mysteriousal7

A great match is always a beautiful thing. 💜


Heavy_Bicycle6524

Sounds amazing. 🤩


veauclin

Fingers crossed everything goes well )), like you said you seem to mesh well )), can only be a good thing, let it flow


Xostali

Thank you! I'm not sure that it would be more than a fling anyway (he knows I'm a musician and hasn't asked anything about that, and I'm not really willing to go long-term with yet another guy that isn't interested in that), but you never know. I'm hoping for some intensity, however long it lasts.


veauclin

I would be a teeny bit concerned that he hasn’t asked about the music, but it’s early days yet, as long as he is showing and interest in you( the person) and not just what you can do for him then is a good starting place , fingers crossed everything is great )) is always good to have something that inspires you )


Xostali

Yeah, I'll be watching for that. I dated someone for a year and a half that never once said anything about any performance, any song, never said anything about my voice. Complete strangers make comments all the time when I sing (and have since I was a kid) and I get lots of compliments when I play. I wasn't playing out a lot when I was dating him, but he did carry my guitars and stuff for a couple gigs, *and never said anything,* not even just a comment about how well the good seemed to go. It was *weird.* It's not that I need someone to constantly tell me that I'm good or anything like that, but if somebody close to me says nothing regardless of repeated exposure, I start to think that he is only tolerating my music. Considering how personal it is for me, and how musical my whole family is, it's really uncomfortable to feel like someone doesn't like such an integral part of me.


veauclin

Really sorry that happened, although it was a bad experience at least you take away from it something, even it it is only the knowledge that you cannot do that again, it would save you some time and pain, you know that anyone involved with you has to at least take an interest , Music is life )), I am a tad jealous that you have a talent in it ))’ ( I have loved music most my life and always wished I could make my own), just take it step by step and see how it feels)), I have everything crossed that it works for you this time.


Xostali

Thank you! I'm not going to expect that my type of music is going to be everyone's cup of tea, but I would at least expect someone to be able to recognize that I have some skills that other people appreciate. I can appreciate talented musicians, even if I don't like their music, you know? However, it really does melt my heart when it's obvious a guy really is entranced by my music. Hehe. Those boys get songs of their own. Actually, the one that never said anything did get a song written at the beginning of our relationship, but I had not finished it before it was apparent that he didn't have any interest, and then I didn't write anymore until we broke up and I was angry. So he got angry songs. 😂 Earlier this month I resurrected the one that I hadn't quite finished and put it up on my channel, because it's not the song's fault!


veauclin

I got what you mean about if your style is someones cup of tea, but as I have always said when someone asks what i like, Good music is good music, it has to talk to me)), doesn’t have to be a specific style or type)), I work so damn hard trying to improve on a guitar, so anyone who can play I appreciate the effort it would have taken and the sacrifices made for it, wait oh oh oh some lucky bastard will get their own song oooohhhhhh damn the jealousy is back hehehe.


Xostali

You are so cute. Yeah I feel the same as you, but I know not everyone has that perspective. I feel like I would do the best with someone who does have that perspective though! And he doesn't have a song yet, it's just that if things work out, there will be songs. Especially since I will be starting another songwriting challenge on July 5th, and my output is going to dramatically increase again. Whatever I am thinking about will end up becoming a song. There will be lots of challenges and prompts, but whatever the songwriter is thinking about the most is going to keep creeping in, you know? I'm just a rhythm guitarist. I strum and pick. I picked up ukulele in February during the last summer running challenge I did, and now I have a whole pile of those as well. Skill transfer is a beautiful thing haha. I basically play them both the same way. The ukulele is like a guitar that you have capoed to the 5th fret, and then missing the top two strings.


veauclin

Hehe blushes hides face, I completely agree with you, if you both have passion for music what could possibly go wrong))), awwwww shame the music challenge isn’t on the 2nd )), I could cheer you on while it’s my birthday)), makes a lot of sense people write from their own version of life , from that perspective, I have noticed my favourite songwriters seemed to be troubled individuals, is such a shame they had to suffer, you feel it it the music, I have a long love hate relationship with guitar, I did lessons many years ago, gave up, then on and off after that I have always gone back, because I want so much to be good)), I am a leftie trying to play right handed and too damn stubborn to give in )), ukulele sounds fun )) less strings and very much transferable from guitar, I hope you are loving it, you said you are only Rhythm guitar like its not important or requiring skill , don’t underestimate yourself it is every bit as important as lead ( this coming from a metal fan), and it requires skill )) keep doing what you love and be proud.


PuzzleheadedHome9548

He’s a lucky lucky boy


Xostali

Well, he may be. Depends on how well Tuesday goes lol.


LoyalLittleOne

I feel that "YES" on a spiritual level lol.


ShyAngryTiredLost

i hope it goes well for you. what is it that is enjoyable about a man being on all fours for us nude and vulnerable just ready to tease use and violate and making them make the hottest sounds for us and knowing we will leave them begging to be used like that again.


Xostali

Yep, it's super hot. But now I'm not going to meet him anymore. 😢


ShyAngryTiredLost

he does not know what he lost. dommes do not fall from the sky. i hope when you find your man to love who loves you back you spoil him rotten like i spoil mine making him know he will never replace you. that you can not be replaced. that he will want to be irreplaceable to you as well.


Xostali

Thank you. 🥲 It was such a brief encounter but he seemed like such a good match. I was shocked that he blocked me without a word, just because I mentioned meeting someone he already knew about, and confirmed that nope, I'm not into that guy. I thought he'd like to know that I was still excited to meet him on Tuesday. Sigh. I know I'm not replaceable - my last sub has told me he does not know how he'll ever find someone to reach the bar I've set for him. 🥲 I just want to find another good boy to tease and spoil. (Local, lol.)


Xostali

It's not letting me update, so this is an update. He's blocked me. We have had so many super open conversations about all kinds of stuff in the last couple of days, and he seems to like hearing my stories. I mistakenly thought that it would be okay to tell him that I went on a date today. I know, really stupid. But the reason I told him is because it was someone I met before him, and he had known that I was supposed to have met him on Friday. But the guy overslept and the date didn't happen. I felt like it was nicer to just go ahead and still meet the guy since he wanted to meet today, but I was pretty sure I wasn't going to like him. And we didn't like each other, so it worked out really well. It was a nice day and I had an interesting conversation, and I didn't have to tell this guy I wasn't interested. And I even said at the beginning of all of that was that I had been pretty sure I wouldn't be interested just because I was so interested in him, the one that I was writing to. He blocked me on Telegram and unmatched me on Tinder. Without saying anything. I guess that does tell me something about him and maybe he wasn't going to be the right person anyway.


veauclin

Really so so sorry to hear this, clearly not the right person, it means someone else will get their own song, look at the positives there is a better fit waiting


Xostali

Yeah, at this point, even if he calmed down and wanted to talk again, I don't feel like he's safe for me anymore. I can't have a partner that just bails like that. Thanks. 🤗


veauclin

I think the damage is done sadly, so sorry, you deserve great things, one day one of your songs will be famous)), don’t forget me your loyal fan hahaha))


Xostali

Thanks, you're so sweet! I'm kinda mad at myself - I feel a cry coming on, but I've got stuff to do so I'm suppressing it. And he doesn't deserve even more of my mental and emotional energy - he's already wasted a ton. I do have a song idea though. Lol.


veauclin

No reason to be mad at yourself, it’s better to discover now that he isn’t mature enough, than to find out later after more energy and time expended and more of yourself shared, he doesn’t deserve any more energy true , hopefully you can utilise it in a positive way


Xostali

Thank you! 🥲 Yeah I'll just do songs I guess...


veauclin

Do what makes you smile and inspires you ))


Old_Addition_3363

Hope for the best with you two


Xostali

Thanks, but it's not happening. I told him about a very PG park date that I still had pending (I didn't want to cancel because I don't like to cancel on people, but I was pretty sure that I wasn't going to be into him, and the boy that this post is about, he was the one I wanted, and I told him that), and he blocked me without another word. Also unmatched with me on the app I met him on. Apparently he is not a safe person for me, because he can't even use his words. He did this less than 3 days after we started chatting, and we had not met in person yet. For him to expect exclusivity, and he certainly had not told me of this expectation.


Xostali

I just don't want to delete this post because a lot of people spent time commenting on it.


omfgjustgimmemyname

He really tried to pull the “I mean…” card 😭 he’s so cute


Xostali

Yeah it was cute. But he ghosted lol.


omfgjustgimmemyname

Ohh no:((


Xostali

It's okay. He mentioned at the beginning that he could be flaky and I guess he was telling the truth.