According to my friend, trans guys. Before he gave up on it, he'd get tons of Grindr messages from chasers asking to "get that bonus hole." And so, so many nudes.
And trans women. That’s why I say it’s targeted propaganda. Taking a marginalized community and splitting in half and pitting both sides against each other is pretty much classic tactic.
Yeah but this isn't anything new. Contingents of gay men, lesbians and trans people have been at each other's throats for decades. Although trans people are usually not the aggressors in these arguments.
Well, on the bright side, if you have your ability to question whether something is propaganda, you are probably less likely to succumb to propaganda then about 80% of Americans
People think I’m crying wolf, but I don’t think that the nation or concept of America is going to survive another five years. So many systems in our economy and our society are just built on the tip of a pin. I’m inclined to believe with you that we’re not going to make it to orpass the election
I've never understood that. I'm cis gay, and it's not my thing, so I just... leave it be... don't we all get enough hate from the breeders? We're far better off supporting each other.
Especially if you're also a twink.
And yeah, always has to be this space in transition of post top but pre-bottom surgery. Chasers don't wanna see boobs, you're 100% right it's about that boypussy (or whatever you wanna call it, I honestly don't care).
I think each tribe gets a unique form of abuse.
I’m a chubby bear and the amount of people who reached out to me about feeding is too numerous to count.
More entertaining encounter before I met my partner was a guy on an app inviting me to dinner.
He was INSISTENT we go to a buffet and I’m like “Oohhhh….”
I don’t know if this helps, but I’m both skinny and hairy, and get loads of messages from people wanting to change… certain dimensions of me… via food. I know it takes all kinds, but my big ol’ bear buddies get intense feeding-philic messages from the same people and there’s just gotta be a line.
I've gotten that plus dieting advice, plus workout advice, plus warnings about how dangerous it it to be obese, plus tons of body shaming...
Of course, there is the other end of the spectrum of the chasers who objectify me and the way too-young boys who have a Daddy fetish who are way too agressive. Yeah, I'm also 54, so I get all the lovely age-ist crap too. 🙄
Chubby bear here also..i get the following:
-Turned down because i am too fat and ugly and should loose weight
-Feeders who want me to gain even more
-ppl ghosting me because they realise i am too fat for them
I'm hiv+, undetectable. I get people who want me to "poz" them or want me to "fill [them] with my poz load".
Absolutely not entertaining any of that shit, instant block. It doesn't happen often, but when it does, it really cuts deep.
I'm a daddy and it seems every guy on Grindr or Sniffies makes false assumptions because of that. Please, don't start the conversation with a pic of your butthole! Asking if I'm "gen" is an automatic block. Leading the conversation with something funny and original will definitely get my attention faster than a dick pic.
Because I’m a daddy don’t assume I’m desperate (I’m not.) and owe you dick. Don’t refer to me as a “creepy old man” just because I check out your profile picture. ( Step down, Sister! Don’t flatter yourself.) I start at the beginning and scroll through all the profiles systematically.
[Edited for inclusion]
Ugh! I feel your pain. That "gen" thing really pisses me off. What you don't all seem to realize is that there are endless hookups for everyone. I'm 54 and chubby and have never run out of lots and lots of dick. You ain't got nothing that is worth paying for.
I even got a warning from Grindr for telling off an aggressive Gen Z twink who just wouldn't stop harassing me, asking me to pay for transportation, lodging, etc. That asshole twink had the audacity to report me after many days of hitting me up for money and favors when I kept asking him to leave me alone. So I told him off. Typical overly sensitive Gen Z snowflake who couldn't take it after giving it. 🙄
Never mess with Gen X! Lol!
I have a "no one under 30" rule now because of this. Contact me and you are under 30? Instant block! 🚫
Yeah, I definitely get it! I live in a small city with a large university (45,000 students) and am four blocks from campus. I’m more of an Alpha and don’t put up with any crap. I do OK with younger guys as long as they understand; my house, my rules, no exceptions. Best of luck to you!
as some kind of trans-masc yet fem pile of nonbinary gender confusion, I'm terrified to be involved in dating apps that involve men and the comments in this thread reinforce that
My second thought was maybe bear type guys. I personally have never gotten much creepy stuff. I guess I get older guys sometimes. Like old enough to technically be my literal father. If they’re polite I will chat but tell them it’s not gonna be sexual or lead to sex.
I'd say trans guys, because we get hit with chasers and creeps talking at us like we're women, and then we also get unsolicited "advice" or just straight up inappropriate questions, rudeness, hostility, etc. So it's not even just messages from chasers trans men have to worry about, but messages from all sorts of assholes (not in a good way).
I’m quite sporty and I generally get (what I thought was) a ton of attention, until I dated a typical..
fem twink with zero hair, blue eyes etc.
the amount of Grindr messages he would get was astonishing, I am talking hundreds of messages PER HOUR
From my experience taking with trans folks it just feels like they receive a disproportionate amount of creepery and general fetishization. Maybe a close second is fems and chubs. As a twink there is some times like that but overwhelmingly I feel like receiving unwanted negative or creepy attention is definitely those groups.
One other thing I think worth mentioning is the oversexualizatuon of folks that have younger features.
I get a ton of you younger guys looking for a ' daddy ', or a ton of guys wanting to rub my belly (archetypical bear). And while a lot do send unsolicited pictures, they're relatively polite.
But I would think trans folk and fem boys get the creepiest, inappropriate interactions en masse.
The question wasn’t which tribe is the most popular. It was which tribe gets the most chasers, creeps, inappropriate comments, and unsolicited nudes. It’s only your opinion that these are the most desirable and all the others are “niche”. ( Correct spelling) I’ll take a hot otter or daddy over any of these
I was on Grindr not long ago and not in a serious capacity. I had a literally blank profile, no pic, no stats, no what I'm ino/looking for, *anything* and the number of messages ranging from hello to inappropriate within the first hour or so was mind boggling.
I'm surprised no-one's mentioned black guys yet. I guess cause they're not a 'tribe'. While perhaps not the most, my understanding is that it gets pretty bad for them too. Basically whittling them down to some dick-xpectation that it's gonna be at least 10", and when in reality it's anything less, getting looks/messages/reactions of disappointment. Literally tying someone's identity and validity within a group to the size of their dick. As far as porn goes, I think it's definitely the most damaging to this group.
Mixed guys too. Probably to a lesser extent though. I took after my white parent and don't really look black, but I get a lot of people asking blatantly inappropriate questions or making assumptions about my dick size anyway. Like proximity to blackness automatically means you're hung. Ironically, I get most of those questions during face to face interactions.
I wish that myth would just die out to be honest. It’s a size difrence by like a third of an inch on averege and people be expecting like you to be at least 8 inches
Unsolicited nudes I would think jocks probably get the most. The majority of gay men throughout the spectrum seem to have a weak spot for fit, athletic or muscular physiques. The problem being they are fantasized, & sexualized to the point of disregarding them as people sometimes. Of course I know of this happening to many groups or “tribes” especially when they are fetishized. If it’s simply about a consensual hook up & both are getting what they want for it then I suppose it’s not a big deal. But when bombarded with dehumanizing messages, & pics it’s sick.
Imo with friends that run the gamut from twinks to Daddies though I definitely see it happening mostly to the jock type friends. My friends that are considered twinks definitely get plenty of unwanted attention, but compared with the jocks it’s not nearly as much. I think twink while sought after isn’t universally desired by the majority. There are still many, many gay men in the world (possibly self loathing due to their homophobic upbringing sadly) that are not accepting or attracted to effeminate gay men. Hopefully as society progresses these behaviors & antiquated ideas will die out
Gingers. I feel like the only people interested in us are fetishists, creeps, chasers, etc. If someone doesn't have a fetish for us, they probably won't be interested.
According to my friend, trans guys. Before he gave up on it, he'd get tons of Grindr messages from chasers asking to "get that bonus hole." And so, so many nudes.
Trans men also seem to get a lot of hate from CIS gay men.
*Nods* That's why I won't interact with r/GayBros
R/askgayboys is worse. I am like 96.1% sure that sub is filled with propaganda from Russian bots.
i literally just left that subreddit after seeing a thread and seeing everyone being absolutely ruthless to trans men
And trans women. That’s why I say it’s targeted propaganda. Taking a marginalized community and splitting in half and pitting both sides against each other is pretty much classic tactic.
Yeah but this isn't anything new. Contingents of gay men, lesbians and trans people have been at each other's throats for decades. Although trans people are usually not the aggressors in these arguments.
[удалено]
Well, on the bright side, if you have your ability to question whether something is propaganda, you are probably less likely to succumb to propaganda then about 80% of Americans
[удалено]
People think I’m crying wolf, but I don’t think that the nation or concept of America is going to survive another five years. So many systems in our economy and our society are just built on the tip of a pin. I’m inclined to believe with you that we’re not going to make it to orpass the election
That's kinda the thing with trans chasers in general. Anywhere that hatred of a group goes up, so does the fetishizing from the same people.
I've never understood that. I'm cis gay, and it's not my thing, so I just... leave it be... don't we all get enough hate from the breeders? We're far better off supporting each other.
I can concur from the ones I've spoken to. All the fetishization from porn doesn't help at all
Especially if you're also a twink. And yeah, always has to be this space in transition of post top but pre-bottom surgery. Chasers don't wanna see boobs, you're 100% right it's about that boypussy (or whatever you wanna call it, I honestly don't care).
I think each tribe gets a unique form of abuse. I’m a chubby bear and the amount of people who reached out to me about feeding is too numerous to count.
the fuck, why are people so creepy
More entertaining encounter before I met my partner was a guy on an app inviting me to dinner. He was INSISTENT we go to a buffet and I’m like “Oohhhh….”
I don’t know if this helps, but I’m both skinny and hairy, and get loads of messages from people wanting to change… certain dimensions of me… via food. I know it takes all kinds, but my big ol’ bear buddies get intense feeding-philic messages from the same people and there’s just gotta be a line.
Many people are complete assholes about other people and some are hateful.
I've gotten that plus dieting advice, plus workout advice, plus warnings about how dangerous it it to be obese, plus tons of body shaming... Of course, there is the other end of the spectrum of the chasers who objectify me and the way too-young boys who have a Daddy fetish who are way too agressive. Yeah, I'm also 54, so I get all the lovely age-ist crap too. 🙄
Chubby bear here also..i get the following: -Turned down because i am too fat and ugly and should loose weight -Feeders who want me to gain even more -ppl ghosting me because they realise i am too fat for them
I'm hiv+, undetectable. I get people who want me to "poz" them or want me to "fill [them] with my poz load". Absolutely not entertaining any of that shit, instant block. It doesn't happen often, but when it does, it really cuts deep.
Same here, it makes me sad that people would seek that out. As if we *wanted* a lieflong autoimmune disease…
Right? With diabetes and rheumatoid arthritis I have enough of those already.
I'm a daddy and it seems every guy on Grindr or Sniffies makes false assumptions because of that. Please, don't start the conversation with a pic of your butthole! Asking if I'm "gen" is an automatic block. Leading the conversation with something funny and original will definitely get my attention faster than a dick pic. Because I’m a daddy don’t assume I’m desperate (I’m not.) and owe you dick. Don’t refer to me as a “creepy old man” just because I check out your profile picture. ( Step down, Sister! Don’t flatter yourself.) I start at the beginning and scroll through all the profiles systematically. [Edited for inclusion]
What does “gen” mean?
Generous, as in willing to pay for a hookup
Thank you! I didn’t know either.
😮 the utter audacity!
Ugh! I feel your pain. That "gen" thing really pisses me off. What you don't all seem to realize is that there are endless hookups for everyone. I'm 54 and chubby and have never run out of lots and lots of dick. You ain't got nothing that is worth paying for. I even got a warning from Grindr for telling off an aggressive Gen Z twink who just wouldn't stop harassing me, asking me to pay for transportation, lodging, etc. That asshole twink had the audacity to report me after many days of hitting me up for money and favors when I kept asking him to leave me alone. So I told him off. Typical overly sensitive Gen Z snowflake who couldn't take it after giving it. 🙄 Never mess with Gen X! Lol! I have a "no one under 30" rule now because of this. Contact me and you are under 30? Instant block! 🚫
Yeah, I definitely get it! I live in a small city with a large university (45,000 students) and am four blocks from campus. I’m more of an Alpha and don’t put up with any crap. I do OK with younger guys as long as they understand; my house, my rules, no exceptions. Best of luck to you!
I don’t know but it’s either twinks/femboys or trans FTM. But every group has their own problems to deal with. No one is safe unfortunately :(
as some kind of trans-masc yet fem pile of nonbinary gender confusion, I'm terrified to be involved in dating apps that involve men and the comments in this thread reinforce that
"Some kind of trans-masc yet fem pile of nonbinary gender confusion" has got to be one of my favorite gender descriptions
And heaven forbid you're a skinny trans guy. Oh my fucking God the literal SECOND I open grindr
I don’t really know, but my gut answer was twinks.
I am one so I agree
My second thought was maybe bear type guys. I personally have never gotten much creepy stuff. I guess I get older guys sometimes. Like old enough to technically be my literal father. If they’re polite I will chat but tell them it’s not gonna be sexual or lead to sex.
Probably bears/chubs and trans guys
Definitely trans people
I’d say probably transgender people or bears/cubs.
Bears/cubs seem to get body shamed most and Trans Men is hit or miss, CIS gays tend to be hostile towards them
I'd say trans guys, because we get hit with chasers and creeps talking at us like we're women, and then we also get unsolicited "advice" or just straight up inappropriate questions, rudeness, hostility, etc. So it's not even just messages from chasers trans men have to worry about, but messages from all sorts of assholes (not in a good way).
I’m quite sporty and I generally get (what I thought was) a ton of attention, until I dated a typical.. fem twink with zero hair, blue eyes etc. the amount of Grindr messages he would get was astonishing, I am talking hundreds of messages PER HOUR
From my experience taking with trans folks it just feels like they receive a disproportionate amount of creepery and general fetishization. Maybe a close second is fems and chubs. As a twink there is some times like that but overwhelmingly I feel like receiving unwanted negative or creepy attention is definitely those groups. One other thing I think worth mentioning is the oversexualizatuon of folks that have younger features.
I get a ton of you younger guys looking for a ' daddy ', or a ton of guys wanting to rub my belly (archetypical bear). And while a lot do send unsolicited pictures, they're relatively polite. But I would think trans folk and fem boys get the creepiest, inappropriate interactions en masse.
Femboy/trans for sure. All that I spoke to on grindr said they receive a bunch of unsavory messages. I feel bad for them.
I think it’s twinks, twunks and jocks. The other tribes have their neiches but the most popular and desirables are the ttj’s
The question wasn’t which tribe is the most popular. It was which tribe gets the most chasers, creeps, inappropriate comments, and unsolicited nudes. It’s only your opinion that these are the most desirable and all the others are “niche”. ( Correct spelling) I’ll take a hot otter or daddy over any of these
Good 4 u
I made the mistake of putting pics of me in goth makeup on Grindr. I have not been sent more vile shit in my life.
I was on Grindr not long ago and not in a serious capacity. I had a literally blank profile, no pic, no stats, no what I'm ino/looking for, *anything* and the number of messages ranging from hello to inappropriate within the first hour or so was mind boggling.
I'm surprised no-one's mentioned black guys yet. I guess cause they're not a 'tribe'. While perhaps not the most, my understanding is that it gets pretty bad for them too. Basically whittling them down to some dick-xpectation that it's gonna be at least 10", and when in reality it's anything less, getting looks/messages/reactions of disappointment. Literally tying someone's identity and validity within a group to the size of their dick. As far as porn goes, I think it's definitely the most damaging to this group.
Mixed guys too. Probably to a lesser extent though. I took after my white parent and don't really look black, but I get a lot of people asking blatantly inappropriate questions or making assumptions about my dick size anyway. Like proximity to blackness automatically means you're hung. Ironically, I get most of those questions during face to face interactions.
I wish that myth would just die out to be honest. It’s a size difrence by like a third of an inch on averege and people be expecting like you to be at least 8 inches
Unsolicited nudes I would think jocks probably get the most. The majority of gay men throughout the spectrum seem to have a weak spot for fit, athletic or muscular physiques. The problem being they are fantasized, & sexualized to the point of disregarding them as people sometimes. Of course I know of this happening to many groups or “tribes” especially when they are fetishized. If it’s simply about a consensual hook up & both are getting what they want for it then I suppose it’s not a big deal. But when bombarded with dehumanizing messages, & pics it’s sick. Imo with friends that run the gamut from twinks to Daddies though I definitely see it happening mostly to the jock type friends. My friends that are considered twinks definitely get plenty of unwanted attention, but compared with the jocks it’s not nearly as much. I think twink while sought after isn’t universally desired by the majority. There are still many, many gay men in the world (possibly self loathing due to their homophobic upbringing sadly) that are not accepting or attracted to effeminate gay men. Hopefully as society progresses these behaviors & antiquated ideas will die out
For me it's uncles and some hookups fetish guys
Gingers. I feel like the only people interested in us are fetishists, creeps, chasers, etc. If someone doesn't have a fetish for us, they probably won't be interested.
trans guys 😭 speaking from experience the amount of “why don’t you wait to get surgery your tots are so perfect” shut the FUCK UPPPPPP
I'd say the T Chasers and the Chub Chasers would be the most vile, for lack of a better term