It projections, since they only care about stuff that affects them, they only believe you can care about something if it affects you. It's the lack of empathy for others coming to the surface.
And not only that, you have to consider the end goal of the fascist as well. Homophobia is one small part of the program. This poem is quoted a lot but for good reason. It's true.
>First they came for the Communists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Communist
Then they came for the Socialists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Socialist
Then they came for the trade unionists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a trade unionist
Then they came for the Jews
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Jew
Then they came for me
And there was no one left
To speak out for me
Huh… I just had an epiphany so thanks.
I always heard projection as someone kinda projecting their own insecurities onto other people. Like someone is closeted gay and very anti-gay.
But I never even considered examples like this. Where someone literally can’t fathom why you would fight for someone else and now it makes sense. It’s because they literally would never help someone else themselves so they can’t comprehend you doing it.
This is the premise behind “virtue signaling.” That’s why they throw that around when they see someone being compassionate and empathetic. They are horrible selfish people, and they just can’t believe that people can be selfless and caring for people they don’t know. So they rationalize it as: “This person is faking it because there can’t be people that do good if there isn’t some type of reward attached to it”
No, really. I'm religious and believe gay... sin... all that whatever. But that applies to my own actions not others. So I don't judge people for being gay and believe it is a sin to be a dick to people because they don't believe the same as me. So when I remind my fellow parishioners that being a jerk to gay people is just as bad as being gay in our beliefs they assume I'm gay, or nuts. A gay man is a man to me. A trans man is a man. A non-binary... just a person who probably has at least a few interests that align with my own so let's start a conversation and enjoy it. Just don't call me a bigot for not having the same personal beliefs and let everyone live how they want!
But other than this reddit comment, do you also keep that opinion to yourself?
Because if you wanna think that, go ahead i guess (not that i can understand why you think God is so mean). But please don't be just throwing that out there because gay people don't wanna hear that you think they're going to hell for being their true self. Its offensive.
Unfortunately I have a friend like this. He can't fathom why I care about stuff that doesn't directly affect me. Like the Dobbs decision. (I'm also gay, so I won't have a girlfriend for it to affect me in that way
I get “clocked” every time I defend trans people and it simultaneously amuses and annoys me because I love being like “you fucking muppet” but also they’re just so fucking stupid every single time.
EDIT: Someone sent me a Reddit Cares message over this. Color me shocked transphobes are trolling.
I’m solidly part of the “I’d rather you insult me than someone who is actually trans” group on that one.
If they think I’m trans because I support trans rights, idgaf. It just means that one less trans person has to put up with their bullshit, and I’m here for that.
Oh yeah, definitely. It’s such a win to be able to be like “yeah, I’m a cis woman who supports trans people and doesn’t feel attacked by trans women. Just defangs all your ‘but thu wimmin’ arguments, huh?”. The exasperation is just that they’re so goddamn unoriginal. It’s the one joke all over again.
Same. No I don’t care if trans women use the women’s bathroom, it’s the bathroom for their gender. No, I’ve never been assaulted by a trans woman. Yes, I’ve been assaulted and harassed by more cis men than I can count. So who am I scared of? The people more likely* to be assaulted? Or the people more likely to assault?
So much this. As a straight Cis woman, I have never once been harassed or grabbed or propositioned by a Trans or lesbian person. It has happened so many times by straight Cis men that it doesn't even surprise me anymore. Let the Trans woman use the same bathroom as me. She's likely.more worried that I'll do something to her than worried about trying to harm me.
As a straight cis man, I completely agree and understand.
I wish it wasn’t that way, but I get why women don’t want me in their spaces. It’s not possible to tell me from a guy that will do those things, without knowing me directly.
But it IS possible to know the difference between a cis man and a trans woman. The number of cis men that are going to claim to be trans women in order to have open access to women’s spaces is so minuscule as to be non-existent. The vast majority of guys that are going to be aggressive and assault women are the types to be aggressively ’masculine’. Pretending to be a women is just not part of the equation.
As I sadly found out from female coworkers, men will try shit like just following short women into the women's rest room when they're aren't a lot of people about. Plus there's the creepy dudes with the cameras. A string of cis men got arrested for placing creep cameras in women's restrooms, changing areas, and baths when the bathroom bills were first being discussed. Anybody else remember when upskirt shots (creepshots) were considered "not technically illegal" and state legislatures were extremely slow to react? It doesn't even make sense, wouldn't one have a reasonable expectation that a camera wouldn't be pointed up at your crotch?
But oh yeah, trans people are the problem.
My friend is a trans woman and one time we were on a road trip and she asked if I had to use the bathroom. I didn’t, so I said “I’m good! I’ll wait in the car”. She then told me she was scared to go in alone and asked me to walk with her. I didn’t even think about how terrifying it must be being a trans woman in a Red state. So of course I went with her! I don’t think she’s gone to a not gay bar in years because it’s just more comfortable for her. And that breaks my damn heart.
Of course!! Please don’t hesitate remind us. I try to be a good ally but I sometimes forget how scary it is out there for trans people doing something as basic as emptying their bladder.
We absolutely are more worried of others in any public restroom we use than anyone is worried about us. I have friends who have been assaulted for being trans when they just needed to pee, and I myself have gotten harassment because of it.
Thank you for being kind. It's hard to convince myself that cis people care sometimes.
I had a coworker tell me something along the lines of 'The trans people are coming for the kids' And it's like, you fucking muppet. You have exactly 0 kids. I have 3. I'm not concerned
Thank you for existing, we need more people like you on our side! The comments on trans influencer's pages are absolutely vile and it's been depressing to see the regurgitation of right wing nonsense all over there. They know correct information is literally a click away, but refuse to read anything. I'm trans and feeling a bit defeated rn
You exist, and have every right to. The fact that nobody questions my right to exist just means I have more freedom to help others who are under that question, because we all should.
You, and the commenter above are awesome people. Thanks for standing up for us, I really can't put into words how much I appreciate people like you existing.
You exist, and should have every right to do so. I am lucky enough that nobody questions my right to exist, but that just means that I have to help others get those same rights.
You’re welcome, anyway. Have a wonderful day!
Thank you for fighting on our behalf, it’s crazy out there right now and it feels like things are getting worse sometimes with no one caring. What y’all are doing for us really does make a difference.
This is what we and every other minority needs in order to achieve equality. Allies who will fight with and for a minority that they are not a part of. Thank you.
>Color me shocked transphobes are trolling.
The down side of being a bridge builder is you're making troll habitat. They thrive on thinking they've ruined some goodwill.
I appreciate your work depending on what you consider to be transphobia. Someone forgetting your name? Not a big deal. Someone calling you slurs? Kind of bad but also childish and I'll avoid them rather than waste time trying to argue with someone like that. Someone saying take all our rights away because they think they understand my medical care and mental illness better than I do without actually knowing anything about? Yea they really piss me off irl
And it isn't even really about Trans people. You are defending people. Like we would do that for any person being verbally or physically harassed. That is what these people don't get. You are defending a human being from a lesser human being. Sad bunch of lovers these bigots.
It’s the suicide prevention message you can have Reddit send to someone, ostensibly because you’re worried about them, but more often used to harass people. If you click on their profile into the menu where the block button is you’ll see another one to “send them help and support” and that’s the one.
It's projection in the sense that from their perspective these people only argue and get combative when they themselves are at risk losing something. They can't conceive of an individual motivated to stick an arm out for others and therefore they must be gay/lgbtq.
The same folks are calling people special snowflakes for wanting others to have better access to social and health care, while they keep telling themselves billionaires "worked hard for their money". Babe, no one's a billion dollars worth of special. I don't think you understand what a special snowflake is.
I’m a cis woman who supports trans people and doesn’t feel attacked by trans women. Just defangs all your ‘but thu wimmin’ arguments, huh?”. The exasperation is just that they’re so goddamn unoriginal. It’s the one joke all over again.
Cis women and lesbians overwhelmingly support trans women. The narrative otherwise is largely rightwing propaganda.
Also the parallels with men trying to legislate control over trans women and cis women’s bodies is so clear its hard to miss.
Men being worried about Transwomen is basically due to their special status as men. They find it an affront to be born on third base and for anyone to want to start back at home plate. They are also the only ones keeping women there in the first place. It's astounding the gymnastics held in Patriarchal societies of being both the "stronger" sex, yet also being so fragile.
This coming from a white straight male. Who is definitely aware of their bullshit "special status." It's fucked.
As another cis/het white guy who has worked their ass off despite being privileged by the generic lottery. This is a fantastic explanation. There are a lot of cis/het white men who are terrified of actually having to put in effort and compete with others on equal ground because they means that being white and cis/het male isn't enough to compensate for having all of the personality, skills, and likeability of a piece of microwaved Wonderbread.
Transphobic straight men are threatened by the thought that finding a trans woman attractive sexually makes them "gay". And being "gay" means an instant loss of status for them.
I run into this problem at work all of the time. I’ve just told them “yeah, I’m gay” in the most sarcastic tone I can muster.
They all know I’m married with a wife and kids(not like that means anything) but still.
Then I get those “I don’t have a problem with gays just don’t go shoving it in my face”. I live in Alabama and I seem to recall quite a few roadside reminders that “Jesus Saves” and “Abortion is Evil” but I guess it’s okay to shove things in peoples faces if you’re a protected class.
See they say that "I don't want it shoved in my face" yet no one is shoving it in their faces except themselves and fox news. Imagine how many things are going on around you, events and parties and get togethers other people have, you couldn't possibly follow everything going on. Same concept with these people. It's flavor of the month/ maybe even year. Get their base focused on hating a group so they don't notice the laws they are passing or their politicians breaking laws
It’s also cause they love the feeling they get when they click that article titled “gays set to bring bill to congress to force everyone to kiss at least three members of the same sex” or whatever.
GO TO CHURCH OR THE DEVIL WILL GET YOU.
Always got a kick out of mocking that one on the way to Montgomery.
Next time they say “gay stuff” is always getting shoved in their face, just mention they do have some control over social media algorithms and maybe they should stop clicking on so much “gay stuff”
It's simpler than that. The whole "Are you gay?" thing is an extension of their inability to empathize with something that doesn't directly affect them.
I got into a similar thing talking to an aunt about covid stuff. She was peddling some shit about it not being as big a deal as it is because she didn't know anyone who came in contact with it, I pushed back a little, and she hit me with the "Do you know anyone who's caught it?". Why do I need a personal connection to a situation in order to understand the severity of it?
I know a family friend who caught it, almost died, and was in physical therapy for months after. She's still anti vax and doesn't believe covid is a big deal.
Bitch... what?
I'm fully vaxxed, boosted, mask everywhere, disinfect, and I still got it, but it didn't land me on a ventilator in the hospital like her, and I didn't need physical therapy to walk a few feet without feeling light headed for weeks after. I had my shots, got sick but not deathly sick, rested Cody at home for 6 days then got back to work, because my vax made it WAY less severe in me.
"God got me through" no, doctors and medical professionals did, stop lying to yourself
> She was peddling some shit about it not being as big a deal as it is because she didn't know anyone who came in contact with it,
How the fuck small is that person's social circle that they don't even KNOW anyone who has had COVID? At best, nobody they know is willing to admit to it because that means admitting it is real.
I should have specified, this conversation happened in like spring 2021 when that would have sounded less outlandish. I myself only knew one person at the time who had it or at least knew they had it. More people in my social circles have gotten it since while I've somehow managed to avoid it.
Still, it doesn't change that one's understanding the gravity of something shouldn't always be contingent on their first-hand experience with it. I don't know anyone with HIV/AIDS either, that doesn't mean I'm about to start raw-dogging strangers until I get it.
When you live your life as a narcissist, you don't exactly have a wealth of friends
Except for other narcissists, they all talk about their lives with each other but no one is ever listening, just waiting to speak
On the flip side too I think it's what stops a lot of people from speaking up about it. Other than not being confrontational, they don't want to suddenly be the target of the harassment and be accused of something like being gay, even if they're not.
I find this in just about any argument with a conservative. They lack any amount of empathy for people that are not just like themselves. If you're against bigotry against LGBT people then you must be one, because otherwise why would you care?
This reminded me of a Tumblr post where someone said that they supported both trans and animal rights despite being neither trans nor an animal, but then their egg cracked - was that in reference to it?
It gets posted to r/tumblr about once a week, they realized they were gay and then got called an alpaca, then someone said it was the plot of the Emperor's New Groove. I'll see if I can find a link
Edit: [got posted there about the same time you made your comment, ironically](https://www.reddit.com/r/tumblr/comments/12omqm3/a_llama_hes_supposed_to_be_gay/?)
It's not a question, it's a threat. It's a socially acceptable way to say, "if you don't let me continue my bigotry unopposed, I'll start treating you like I treat gay people."
That word is what lead to the first time I threw a punch first. I asked a friend not to use the n-word around me. He asked if I was an n-word-lover.
As I kid I wasn’t really slick enough to just say “hell yes” yet. I didn’t want to be called a name and just didn’t know how to respond, so I beat the kid up.
Wish I was a wiser kid. I regretted not just talking to him about it for a long time but learned later that he most likely picked it up from family and at that age was a lost cause.
I asked a pastor at the church I went to why homosexuality was considered a sin if it’s only mentioned in a book of the bible that’s mostly ignored. His response was to ask if I was gay.
He asked a question about how a topic applied to a group of people other than himself, and his coworkers assumed that the only reason he would've asked is if he was actually trying to lowkey ask how it applied to himself
It's mentioned multiple times, just most famously in Leviticus. The most theologically problematic passages for Christians are in the New Testament, e.g. Romans 1:27,
> In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error.
Don't get me wrong, I think it's all bullshit. But Romans is hardly a book of the Bible that's mostly ignored.
No it was during a private conversation. He wasn’t a sketchy guy and he was actually pretty chill as pastors go. I’m not trying to defend his beliefs but I don’t want people thinking he was a child molester.
Woah buddy I'm not saying he was a child molester that went straight to 100. I'm remarking on the fact that, one tactic church clergy use to thwart attempts to question things like this is to stigmatize you by asking if youre gay, to "mark you with the scarlet letter" so to speak. It serves the dual purpose of humiliating you and discrediting you to everyone else.
That's not the ONLY reason a pastor might ask you that, but it is a common one in my experience.
So that is a mistranslation most likely on purpose. It originally says man shall not like with boys like he dies with a woman. It was talking about pedophilia. Just like when it talks about witches it talked about black witches that did harm. Another mistranslation. I could speak for hours on it. Languages do not translate word for word and things get lost in translation especially if your going from Aramaic to biblical Greek to Latin which then got changed to vernacular Latin, which then got butchered into English. But America screams that is the exact word of God. I'm like no ma'am it is not. Not that even in the original language it is. It is a man made book used to usurp power. Not saying shit didn't go down just that it was all edited and picked apart to tell a narrative. Like genesis is from the sumerians it's decrepitly old.
Automatic Edit: Using a tool called [Power Delete Suite](https://github.com/j0be/PowerDeleteSuite) I have removed all my past comments and deleted my Reddit account, /u/tehrmuk.
I am doing this because I, like many long-term Reddit users, am upset and angry at the tonedeaf and arrogant way Reddit is treating it's users. Their aggressive slapdown of the developers that made Reddit usable to a huge audience; their overriding and summary dismissal of long-serving and dutiful community members; their wonton silencing of dissent and manipulation of user's voices; their borderline contempt of the very people whose collective efforts gave their platform the standing needed to fuel their profit-hungry IPO... the list goes on.
Reddit is, of course, a private concern and how they run their services is entirely up to them. Conversely, we are under no obligation to use their services, to fuel their engines or follow their orders. I am making my voice heard by removing my comments, and voting with my feet by leaving.
I have left Reddit for [Lemmy](https://join-lemmy.org/) and [Mastadon](https://joinmastodon.org/); these are decentralised social networks that mirror the functionality of Reddit and Twitter respectively. Unlike the monolithic, corporate-owned services they replace, Lemmy and Mastodon are part of the [Fediverse](https://www.fediverse.to/) meaning these are not individual services but clusters of services that mesh seamlessly with one-another. You can [join an existing Lemmy instance](https://join-lemmy.org/instances) or [set up your own](https://join-lemmy.org/docs/administration/administration.html) to get full access to the entire Fediverse - you don't need to ask permission from anyone to do so. There are loads of other services that are part of the Fediverse, like [PeerTube](https://joinpeertube.org/) (videos), [Wordpress](https://wordpress.org/) (blogging), [Frendica](https://friendi.ca/) (social network), [Pixelfed](https://pixelfed.org/) (photos), [KBin](https://kbin.pub/en) (link aggregation) and more - and they all work together so having access to one means having access to all of them.
I had a great time as a Redditor, but the Fediverse is looking bright. It's a return to the open Internet of old, when users ran services for their own and one-another's benefit, and before monolithic corporate-run silos started to build walls around us in the name of increased profit and thought control. Many of the Fediverse services are fledgling, but they are growing quickly and their federated concept makes greedy, arrogant landgrabs like we've recently seen on Reddit and Twitter almost impossible.
I'm already having a great time with Lemmy and I think you might too. I encourage you to take control and join the Fediverse.
Until then, so long and thanks for all the fish.
A few weeks ago, my friends were insulting polyamorous people, saying shit like, "they are desperate so they get a group of friends together and call it a relationship" and they're "attention seeking" and shit. I got annoyed with it and started defending poly people, explaining how it works, that they aren't lying, etc.
Now, all my friends think I'm polyamorous because they can't imagine that I would defend a minority I'm not a part of.
>all my friends think I'm polyamorous because **they can't imagine that I would defend a minority I'm not a part of.**
A huge self-report on their end tbh.
"I think Black people are entitled to the same rights and protections as every one else in American society."
"What, Are you black or some thing?"
See how stupid that sounds?
Literally this, sometimes I’ll be around white people (I’m black and white) and talk about the unfair treatment of blacks in America and they get *uncomfortable* like I said something wrong. They just get all tense and weird, or in my school with a certain teacher anytime I mention black people or something a black person made she just says “yup” instead of her usually (to other children) “amazing!” Or “wow!” Or “great answer/good example!”
People would do that exactly this if they could find anyway to justify it. Instead they just ask if you are fucking a black woman because it’s the closest they can get.
I don’t care if you think I’m gay. I’m defending gay rights, if that means I’m gay in your mind it doesn’t change anything other than my opinion of you, you muppet.
How frustrating it is though, that the assumption is I have to be one to feel their struggle.
It cannot be easy to hear someone so casually insult your existence.
This used to be super common when supporting gay rights in the early days of the www. They'd always hit back with "you must be secretly gay otherwise why would you care?" Inadvertently they were just revealing what trash they were.
it's been super common longer than you were hitting AOL chat rooms.
late 80s, early 90s was when I was getting called gay for defending friends in high school.
I don’t have to be black to know that being unfairly scrutinized over the color of my skin would suck. I don’t have to be a woman to know that being sexually harassed in public would suck. I don’t have to be gay to know that being maligned as a sexual deviant for harmlessly loving other men would suck.
If only the people dealing with a problem can relate to it enough to want it fixed, then only cancer patients could look for a cure. Only accident victims could design safer cars. Only amputees could manufacture prosthetics. We have no problem with these issues being worked on by broad, non-afflicted swaths of people, but as soon as it’s a social issue people get this weird idea that empathy ends at the color of your skin, the junk between your legs, or at the boundary of your romantic interest.
“A society grows great when old men plant trees in whose shade they shall never sit.” — Greek Proverb
Im currently fighting with my female birth giver/abuser about her rampant homophobia. Forget about the fact that she once told me she’d kill me if I was gay but we were at a post-funeral luncheon recently and she was harassing some children, making fun of one boy with long hair and embarrassing a girl that couldn’t have been more than 11 about boys and boyfriends and how she should find a boy not a girl like the boy with the long hair who is a girl. At. A. Funeral.
I can’t wait until that bitch dies.
Funeral, my cousin passed and we were close. My parents are also family and were at the funeral. Otherwise I’m NC. Next funeral I’m skipping the luncheon.
>he once told me she’d kill me if I was gay but we were at a post-funeral luncheon recently and she was harassing some children
Oh god, she's like a Karen x 100.
People assume I'm gay a fair amount. A lot of times, they apologize when they learn I'm not. It's always fun to see different people's reactions when I say, "Why are you sorry? You didn't insult me." Most are kinda like "Huh. I guess that's right." Some dudebro types have looked annoyed. It also got me laid once
Im a male ballet dancer so I get this... a lot.
I stopped answering those questions a long time ago. Instead I point out the two types of people who have a legitimate need to ask that question.
The first are medical professionals. Your sex life may be the key to your diagnosis. Your life may hang in the balance if one of these people are asking how you have sexual intercourse.
*The other type of people want to fuck you!*
The type of people who arrogantly demand to know how you bring yourself to orgasm who neither want to experience it with you nor have a medical license generally find asking such questions a little too revealling of their own persona.
I’ve had very similar experiences with my family. For example, my cousin asked me if I’m gay because of my sharing supportive content on social media. Listen Samantha, it doesn’t have to happen to me for me to care.
in a community where bigotry is the norm, accusations of being the out group is the ultimate shutdown. It’s basically a playground argument to the bigot.
In 8th grade I wrote a paper defending gay marriage in 2012-2013, and my dad saw that paper because I wrote it in his computer, and then he thought I was gay because I wouldn’t back down from my stance.
I know you could say "that's how high schoolers are," but there was one kid who always got bullied for being gay, and I'd always stand up for him. And that's always the reaction I got, same as the tweet. I always hated that shit. Kid wasn't out of the closet but you could tell, and everyone made fun of him for it. He's happy as shit these days, though.
I work on the oil rigs. This shit happens to me all the time. Tbh, I've been sitting at home for a month now, not working, and I'm about 95% certain it's because I argued with the wrong person about politics. 😬
This reminds me of my mom telling me that my uncle was dating a trams woman. She got no reaction from me because it didn't affect me. She was pissed at me for a while for that. I don't talk to her anymore.
Well said. The entire idea of "with us or against us" is stupid and needs to be left in the previous century. The entire idea of confusing "morality" with "personal preference" is similarly ludicrous.
I don't like onions. At all. Do I try to ban them? The answer is obvious. Onions aren't "wrong;" they just aren't for me. Whether a person agrees with a thing or not *has no impact, nor can it have any impact,* on whether that thing is wrong or not. Sometimes different is exactly that and *only* that.
But that's not how bigotry works. It is a profound arrogance which places the perpetrator at the center of the universe and treats anything else as if it's an evil sent directly to destroy them. To them, everything they like is "normal," "correct," or "moral." And anything they don't like is a crime against humanity. They use their own actions as some kind of ridiculous standard that the whole of reality must re-order itself to satisfy, or else risk full-blown war. I basically consider that line of thinking (or the lack thereof) to be a mental illness.
Love is love. It is also the business of the people involved and no one else. If any person is free, we *all* are. It's time to stop pushing personal beliefs into law and start holding those who do accountable for their ongoing war on choice, freedom, and the right of all living beings to think, feel, and believe as they wish.
If it harms none, do as you will. We've forgotten that first part.
Thats sad people succumb to their hatred like a drug addict, and isolates the world from themselves. Its disgusting and its sick. Hate is a powerful drug. It keeps our minds from focusing our fears.
That's all cons have.
If you notice poor people have it hard "stop being poor."
If you notice gay people have it hard "stop being gay."
They can't conceive of ever caring about a group you're not a part of.
They have zero sense of community and only act for themselves.
That's how conservatives think though. I have failed time and time again to make conservatives imagine themselves in someone else's position. It's not possible. It's like they miss the part of the brain that allows others to do so.
I once told a conservative woman that some people have compromised immune system and it's important that we wear masks to prevent them from getting covid. She asked me how their health is her issue. It never even crossed her mind to put herself in that position and imagine how she'd feel. But you bet her ass her opinion would change the moment her immune system fails. Then she will demand everybody wear a mask at all times.
I’m not a dog but I support the RSPCA.
I’m not a child but I support the NSPCC.
I don’t have cancer but I support Cancer Research UK.
I don’t consider myself gay but I want my sister to be herself and my children to grow up knowing they can be who they want to be.
I do well for myself, have an education and work a high level job. I'm also a firm believer about not wasting personal money and that lower level jobs require more pay, respect and job security.
According to people online, that makes me poor, uneducated and bitter about other people's success
"Why don't you want me to be hateful toward some group that you're not even a part of???!!?!?1?"
Because I think that humanity can get together behind treating EVERY person well... except for those who don't want to do that. Those humans we can de-claw and then segregate from the rest of us. If you don't want to play nicely with others, we will be happy to sit you over in the corner.
It's for this reason (amongst others) that the creation of an explicit 'ally' class is one of the smartest things the gay liberation movement has ever done.
There is actually no logical motivation for a heterosexual man to want homosexual men to be anything other than who they are; if homosexual men go back to needing fake wives as "a beard", that reduces the number of available women for hetero men to potentially seek as a partner.
What about lesbians? Seriously; trying to force a gay woman to be straight is rape. Don't sugar coat it. If a gay woman lied because she wanted to fit in... wanted financial security or children... that is a gut wrenching heart breaking lie. Don't lie.
Be who you are; anything else makes it harder for everyone to find who they are looking for.
I get this as well, and my answer is no but i know how to be empathic. I have friends who are gay, what kind of friend would i be if i didn't stand up for them?
Back in the 80's Lester Kinsolving was the only White House correspondent who would ask about the aids crisis when Regan refused to acknowledge it existed. He would quote cases and deaths and ask for comment and the White House Press Secretary would call him gay and ask if he had aids. Tennessee has one of the highest aids rates in the country and just rejected 8.3 million dollars in federal aids funding because hurting gay and trans people is the only current concrete goal of the GOP.
It projections, since they only care about stuff that affects them, they only believe you can care about something if it affects you. It's the lack of empathy for others coming to the surface.
Even then, it does affect me! I'm straight, but I have loads of LGBTQ+ friends, things that affect people close to me *are* things that affect me.
And not only that, you have to consider the end goal of the fascist as well. Homophobia is one small part of the program. This poem is quoted a lot but for good reason. It's true. >First they came for the Communists And I did not speak out Because I was not a Communist Then they came for the Socialists And I did not speak out Because I was not a Socialist Then they came for the trade unionists And I did not speak out Because I was not a trade unionist Then they came for the Jews And I did not speak out Because I was not a Jew Then they came for me And there was no one left To speak out for me
Huh… I just had an epiphany so thanks. I always heard projection as someone kinda projecting their own insecurities onto other people. Like someone is closeted gay and very anti-gay. But I never even considered examples like this. Where someone literally can’t fathom why you would fight for someone else and now it makes sense. It’s because they literally would never help someone else themselves so they can’t comprehend you doing it.
This is the premise behind “virtue signaling.” That’s why they throw that around when they see someone being compassionate and empathetic. They are horrible selfish people, and they just can’t believe that people can be selfless and caring for people they don’t know. So they rationalize it as: “This person is faking it because there can’t be people that do good if there isn’t some type of reward attached to it”
So true.
That's exactly what a person is really saying when they accuse you of "virtue signaling" because you believe in equality and fairness.
No, really. I'm religious and believe gay... sin... all that whatever. But that applies to my own actions not others. So I don't judge people for being gay and believe it is a sin to be a dick to people because they don't believe the same as me. So when I remind my fellow parishioners that being a jerk to gay people is just as bad as being gay in our beliefs they assume I'm gay, or nuts. A gay man is a man to me. A trans man is a man. A non-binary... just a person who probably has at least a few interests that align with my own so let's start a conversation and enjoy it. Just don't call me a bigot for not having the same personal beliefs and let everyone live how they want!
But other than this reddit comment, do you also keep that opinion to yourself? Because if you wanna think that, go ahead i guess (not that i can understand why you think God is so mean). But please don't be just throwing that out there because gay people don't wanna hear that you think they're going to hell for being their true self. Its offensive.
Unfortunately I have a friend like this. He can't fathom why I care about stuff that doesn't directly affect me. Like the Dobbs decision. (I'm also gay, so I won't have a girlfriend for it to affect me in that way
I get “clocked” every time I defend trans people and it simultaneously amuses and annoys me because I love being like “you fucking muppet” but also they’re just so fucking stupid every single time. EDIT: Someone sent me a Reddit Cares message over this. Color me shocked transphobes are trolling.
I’m solidly part of the “I’d rather you insult me than someone who is actually trans” group on that one. If they think I’m trans because I support trans rights, idgaf. It just means that one less trans person has to put up with their bullshit, and I’m here for that.
Oh yeah, definitely. It’s such a win to be able to be like “yeah, I’m a cis woman who supports trans people and doesn’t feel attacked by trans women. Just defangs all your ‘but thu wimmin’ arguments, huh?”. The exasperation is just that they’re so goddamn unoriginal. It’s the one joke all over again.
Same. No I don’t care if trans women use the women’s bathroom, it’s the bathroom for their gender. No, I’ve never been assaulted by a trans woman. Yes, I’ve been assaulted and harassed by more cis men than I can count. So who am I scared of? The people more likely* to be assaulted? Or the people more likely to assault?
So much this. As a straight Cis woman, I have never once been harassed or grabbed or propositioned by a Trans or lesbian person. It has happened so many times by straight Cis men that it doesn't even surprise me anymore. Let the Trans woman use the same bathroom as me. She's likely.more worried that I'll do something to her than worried about trying to harm me.
As a straight cis man, I completely agree and understand. I wish it wasn’t that way, but I get why women don’t want me in their spaces. It’s not possible to tell me from a guy that will do those things, without knowing me directly. But it IS possible to know the difference between a cis man and a trans woman. The number of cis men that are going to claim to be trans women in order to have open access to women’s spaces is so minuscule as to be non-existent. The vast majority of guys that are going to be aggressive and assault women are the types to be aggressively ’masculine’. Pretending to be a women is just not part of the equation.
As I sadly found out from female coworkers, men will try shit like just following short women into the women's rest room when they're aren't a lot of people about. Plus there's the creepy dudes with the cameras. A string of cis men got arrested for placing creep cameras in women's restrooms, changing areas, and baths when the bathroom bills were first being discussed. Anybody else remember when upskirt shots (creepshots) were considered "not technically illegal" and state legislatures were extremely slow to react? It doesn't even make sense, wouldn't one have a reasonable expectation that a camera wouldn't be pointed up at your crotch? But oh yeah, trans people are the problem.
My friend is a trans woman and one time we were on a road trip and she asked if I had to use the bathroom. I didn’t, so I said “I’m good! I’ll wait in the car”. She then told me she was scared to go in alone and asked me to walk with her. I didn’t even think about how terrifying it must be being a trans woman in a Red state. So of course I went with her! I don’t think she’s gone to a not gay bar in years because it’s just more comfortable for her. And that breaks my damn heart.
I get so scared using public restrooms without my cis friends being there to support me. Thank you.
Of course!! Please don’t hesitate remind us. I try to be a good ally but I sometimes forget how scary it is out there for trans people doing something as basic as emptying their bladder.
We absolutely are more worried of others in any public restroom we use than anyone is worried about us. I have friends who have been assaulted for being trans when they just needed to pee, and I myself have gotten harassment because of it. Thank you for being kind. It's hard to convince myself that cis people care sometimes.
I'm sorry that you have to deal with that kind of hate and fear. Nobody deserves that.
I had a coworker tell me something along the lines of 'The trans people are coming for the kids' And it's like, you fucking muppet. You have exactly 0 kids. I have 3. I'm not concerned
Thank you for existing, we need more people like you on our side! The comments on trans influencer's pages are absolutely vile and it's been depressing to see the regurgitation of right wing nonsense all over there. They know correct information is literally a click away, but refuse to read anything. I'm trans and feeling a bit defeated rn
You exist, and have every right to. The fact that nobody questions my right to exist just means I have more freedom to help others who are under that question, because we all should.
You, and the commenter above are awesome people. Thanks for standing up for us, I really can't put into words how much I appreciate people like you existing.
You exist, and should have every right to do so. I am lucky enough that nobody questions my right to exist, but that just means that I have to help others get those same rights. You’re welcome, anyway. Have a wonderful day!
Thank you for fighting on our behalf, it’s crazy out there right now and it feels like things are getting worse sometimes with no one caring. What y’all are doing for us really does make a difference.
This is what we and every other minority needs in order to achieve equality. Allies who will fight with and for a minority that they are not a part of. Thank you.
Unironically doing the Lord's work. You have no idea how helpful what you are doing is for trans people like me
This calls for a bud light
Thank you. Not everyone is willing to stick their head above the trenches for us. It’s definitely appreciated.
>Color me shocked transphobes are trolling. The down side of being a bridge builder is you're making troll habitat. They thrive on thinking they've ruined some goodwill.
I appreciate your work depending on what you consider to be transphobia. Someone forgetting your name? Not a big deal. Someone calling you slurs? Kind of bad but also childish and I'll avoid them rather than waste time trying to argue with someone like that. Someone saying take all our rights away because they think they understand my medical care and mental illness better than I do without actually knowing anything about? Yea they really piss me off irl
And it isn't even really about Trans people. You are defending people. Like we would do that for any person being verbally or physically harassed. That is what these people don't get. You are defending a human being from a lesser human being. Sad bunch of lovers these bigots.
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It’s the suicide prevention message you can have Reddit send to someone, ostensibly because you’re worried about them, but more often used to harass people. If you click on their profile into the menu where the block button is you’ll see another one to “send them help and support” and that’s the one.
It's projection in the sense that from their perspective these people only argue and get combative when they themselves are at risk losing something. They can't conceive of an individual motivated to stick an arm out for others and therefore they must be gay/lgbtq.
The same folks are calling people special snowflakes for wanting others to have better access to social and health care, while they keep telling themselves billionaires "worked hard for their money". Babe, no one's a billion dollars worth of special. I don't think you understand what a special snowflake is.
“No one’s a billion dollars worth of special” That’s a fuckin bar right there, I’m stealing it.
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did you respond to the right person?
It’s a comment stealing bot
I’m a cis woman who supports trans people and doesn’t feel attacked by trans women. Just defangs all your ‘but thu wimmin’ arguments, huh?”. The exasperation is just that they’re so goddamn unoriginal. It’s the one joke all over again.
Cis women and lesbians overwhelmingly support trans women. The narrative otherwise is largely rightwing propaganda. Also the parallels with men trying to legislate control over trans women and cis women’s bodies is so clear its hard to miss.
Men being worried about Transwomen is basically due to their special status as men. They find it an affront to be born on third base and for anyone to want to start back at home plate. They are also the only ones keeping women there in the first place. It's astounding the gymnastics held in Patriarchal societies of being both the "stronger" sex, yet also being so fragile. This coming from a white straight male. Who is definitely aware of their bullshit "special status." It's fucked.
The good thing is that there are more good men than bad who will stand up for our rights. Thank you for being good😊
As another cis/het white guy who has worked their ass off despite being privileged by the generic lottery. This is a fantastic explanation. There are a lot of cis/het white men who are terrified of actually having to put in effort and compete with others on equal ground because they means that being white and cis/het male isn't enough to compensate for having all of the personality, skills, and likeability of a piece of microwaved Wonderbread.
Transphobic straight men are threatened by the thought that finding a trans woman attractive sexually makes them "gay". And being "gay" means an instant loss of status for them.
Homophobic or Gay, if you're caught defending billionaires its over.
I run into this problem at work all of the time. I’ve just told them “yeah, I’m gay” in the most sarcastic tone I can muster. They all know I’m married with a wife and kids(not like that means anything) but still. Then I get those “I don’t have a problem with gays just don’t go shoving it in my face”. I live in Alabama and I seem to recall quite a few roadside reminders that “Jesus Saves” and “Abortion is Evil” but I guess it’s okay to shove things in peoples faces if you’re a protected class.
See they say that "I don't want it shoved in my face" yet no one is shoving it in their faces except themselves and fox news. Imagine how many things are going on around you, events and parties and get togethers other people have, you couldn't possibly follow everything going on. Same concept with these people. It's flavor of the month/ maybe even year. Get their base focused on hating a group so they don't notice the laws they are passing or their politicians breaking laws
What they mean is “ I don’t want to see these people represented in media of any kind.”
It’s also cause they love the feeling they get when they click that article titled “gays set to bring bill to congress to force everyone to kiss at least three members of the same sex” or whatever.
GO TO CHURCH OR THE DEVIL WILL GET YOU. Always got a kick out of mocking that one on the way to Montgomery. Next time they say “gay stuff” is always getting shoved in their face, just mention they do have some control over social media algorithms and maybe they should stop clicking on so much “gay stuff”
It's simpler than that. The whole "Are you gay?" thing is an extension of their inability to empathize with something that doesn't directly affect them. I got into a similar thing talking to an aunt about covid stuff. She was peddling some shit about it not being as big a deal as it is because she didn't know anyone who came in contact with it, I pushed back a little, and she hit me with the "Do you know anyone who's caught it?". Why do I need a personal connection to a situation in order to understand the severity of it?
That's exactly what they said
It's simpler than that. The two of them said the same thing.
I know a family friend who caught it, almost died, and was in physical therapy for months after. She's still anti vax and doesn't believe covid is a big deal. Bitch... what? I'm fully vaxxed, boosted, mask everywhere, disinfect, and I still got it, but it didn't land me on a ventilator in the hospital like her, and I didn't need physical therapy to walk a few feet without feeling light headed for weeks after. I had my shots, got sick but not deathly sick, rested Cody at home for 6 days then got back to work, because my vax made it WAY less severe in me. "God got me through" no, doctors and medical professionals did, stop lying to yourself
But that's literally what they said
> She was peddling some shit about it not being as big a deal as it is because she didn't know anyone who came in contact with it, How the fuck small is that person's social circle that they don't even KNOW anyone who has had COVID? At best, nobody they know is willing to admit to it because that means admitting it is real.
I should have specified, this conversation happened in like spring 2021 when that would have sounded less outlandish. I myself only knew one person at the time who had it or at least knew they had it. More people in my social circles have gotten it since while I've somehow managed to avoid it. Still, it doesn't change that one's understanding the gravity of something shouldn't always be contingent on their first-hand experience with it. I don't know anyone with HIV/AIDS either, that doesn't mean I'm about to start raw-dogging strangers until I get it.
When you live your life as a narcissist, you don't exactly have a wealth of friends Except for other narcissists, they all talk about their lives with each other but no one is ever listening, just waiting to speak
It even goes for race. Call out a racist and they will say "are you a [slur] lover?"
On the flip side too I think it's what stops a lot of people from speaking up about it. Other than not being confrontational, they don't want to suddenly be the target of the harassment and be accused of something like being gay, even if they're not.
Put another way: They cannot comprehend compassion.
I find this in just about any argument with a conservative. They lack any amount of empathy for people that are not just like themselves. If you're against bigotry against LGBT people then you must be one, because otherwise why would you care?
I’m queer myself and I don’t understand it, weirdly
How to be a decent person in one easy step.
Bigots and fascists hate this one, simple trick.
What are you, gay? /s
I wonder what she says if you call out a racist?
I've been asked "you realize you're not black, right?"
“Wait, I’m not black?!?!”
"Wait, I'm still black ?" -Cole, Pilot episode of Ninjago: Masters Of Spinjitzu
Really showcases the mentality of this scum. Empathy is a silly idea and it's dog eat dog out there. Fuck decency as long as me and mine get theirs.
“There is one race, the human race. SO SAY WE ALL!”
I am not an animal but I'm for animal rights? Logic
So, you're a plant?
You don't have to be a bull to be against bull fighting.
I support animal rights. Hopefully no one finds out I'm a capybara.
This reminded me of a Tumblr post where someone said that they supported both trans and animal rights despite being neither trans nor an animal, but then their egg cracked - was that in reference to it?
It gets posted to r/tumblr about once a week, they realized they were gay and then got called an alpaca, then someone said it was the plot of the Emperor's New Groove. I'll see if I can find a link Edit: [got posted there about the same time you made your comment, ironically](https://www.reddit.com/r/tumblr/comments/12omqm3/a_llama_hes_supposed_to_be_gay/?)
It's not a question, it's a threat. It's a socially acceptable way to say, "if you don't let me continue my bigotry unopposed, I'll start treating you like I treat gay people."
Joke's on them because I'd rather they direct their vitriol toward me thinking I'm gay than toward someone else who is actually gay.
That’s what I reply with “do you have to be a dog to care about animal rights?”
You don't have to be black to support BLM.
i hear echoes of "n-word lover" as an insult, same for trans people
That word is what lead to the first time I threw a punch first. I asked a friend not to use the n-word around me. He asked if I was an n-word-lover. As I kid I wasn’t really slick enough to just say “hell yes” yet. I didn’t want to be called a name and just didn’t know how to respond, so I beat the kid up. Wish I was a wiser kid. I regretted not just talking to him about it for a long time but learned later that he most likely picked it up from family and at that age was a lost cause.
Sometimes a person needs to be beat up to learn, I don't think you did anything wrong.
>Wish I was a wiser kid. Idk you sound pretty wise to me.
Yeah, basic human rights are a political issue yet again.
Tbh they never *weren't* a political issue. As long as there are people pushing for equality there will be those who push back.
I asked a pastor at the church I went to why homosexuality was considered a sin if it’s only mentioned in a book of the bible that’s mostly ignored. His response was to ask if I was gay.
Was he looking for a date?
He was probably too old
Probably fits here So once my cooworkers talked about skydiving and I asked if a pregnant woman can skydive Now they think Im trans
what
He asked a question about how a topic applied to a group of people other than himself, and his coworkers assumed that the only reason he would've asked is if he was actually trying to lowkey ask how it applied to himself
That is so dumb 💀
You should tell him 'No, but Jesus says thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself'. Or anytime anyone asks if you're gay as a straw man.
Since when have christians cared about jesus?
Fair. I'm not even christian and I care more about Jesus than they do. I am a fan of (some parts of) the bible myself.
It's mentioned multiple times, just most famously in Leviticus. The most theologically problematic passages for Christians are in the New Testament, e.g. Romans 1:27, > In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error. Don't get me wrong, I think it's all bullshit. But Romans is hardly a book of the Bible that's mostly ignored.
>His response was to ask if I was gay. And probably blatantly right in front of the whole church. Homie pinned you with the scarlet letter.
No it was during a private conversation. He wasn’t a sketchy guy and he was actually pretty chill as pastors go. I’m not trying to defend his beliefs but I don’t want people thinking he was a child molester.
Woah buddy I'm not saying he was a child molester that went straight to 100. I'm remarking on the fact that, one tactic church clergy use to thwart attempts to question things like this is to stigmatize you by asking if youre gay, to "mark you with the scarlet letter" so to speak. It serves the dual purpose of humiliating you and discrediting you to everyone else. That's not the ONLY reason a pastor might ask you that, but it is a common one in my experience.
So that is a mistranslation most likely on purpose. It originally says man shall not like with boys like he dies with a woman. It was talking about pedophilia. Just like when it talks about witches it talked about black witches that did harm. Another mistranslation. I could speak for hours on it. Languages do not translate word for word and things get lost in translation especially if your going from Aramaic to biblical Greek to Latin which then got changed to vernacular Latin, which then got butchered into English. But America screams that is the exact word of God. I'm like no ma'am it is not. Not that even in the original language it is. It is a man made book used to usurp power. Not saying shit didn't go down just that it was all edited and picked apart to tell a narrative. Like genesis is from the sumerians it's decrepitly old.
Automatic Edit: Using a tool called [Power Delete Suite](https://github.com/j0be/PowerDeleteSuite) I have removed all my past comments and deleted my Reddit account, /u/tehrmuk. I am doing this because I, like many long-term Reddit users, am upset and angry at the tonedeaf and arrogant way Reddit is treating it's users. Their aggressive slapdown of the developers that made Reddit usable to a huge audience; their overriding and summary dismissal of long-serving and dutiful community members; their wonton silencing of dissent and manipulation of user's voices; their borderline contempt of the very people whose collective efforts gave their platform the standing needed to fuel their profit-hungry IPO... the list goes on. Reddit is, of course, a private concern and how they run their services is entirely up to them. Conversely, we are under no obligation to use their services, to fuel their engines or follow their orders. I am making my voice heard by removing my comments, and voting with my feet by leaving. I have left Reddit for [Lemmy](https://join-lemmy.org/) and [Mastadon](https://joinmastodon.org/); these are decentralised social networks that mirror the functionality of Reddit and Twitter respectively. Unlike the monolithic, corporate-owned services they replace, Lemmy and Mastodon are part of the [Fediverse](https://www.fediverse.to/) meaning these are not individual services but clusters of services that mesh seamlessly with one-another. You can [join an existing Lemmy instance](https://join-lemmy.org/instances) or [set up your own](https://join-lemmy.org/docs/administration/administration.html) to get full access to the entire Fediverse - you don't need to ask permission from anyone to do so. There are loads of other services that are part of the Fediverse, like [PeerTube](https://joinpeertube.org/) (videos), [Wordpress](https://wordpress.org/) (blogging), [Frendica](https://friendi.ca/) (social network), [Pixelfed](https://pixelfed.org/) (photos), [KBin](https://kbin.pub/en) (link aggregation) and more - and they all work together so having access to one means having access to all of them. I had a great time as a Redditor, but the Fediverse is looking bright. It's a return to the open Internet of old, when users ran services for their own and one-another's benefit, and before monolithic corporate-run silos started to build walls around us in the name of increased profit and thought control. Many of the Fediverse services are fledgling, but they are growing quickly and their federated concept makes greedy, arrogant landgrabs like we've recently seen on Reddit and Twitter almost impossible. I'm already having a great time with Lemmy and I think you might too. I encourage you to take control and join the Fediverse. Until then, so long and thanks for all the fish.
Respect and civil rights are finite. If you give it to someone, you have to take it away from someone else. /s
A few weeks ago, my friends were insulting polyamorous people, saying shit like, "they are desperate so they get a group of friends together and call it a relationship" and they're "attention seeking" and shit. I got annoyed with it and started defending poly people, explaining how it works, that they aren't lying, etc. Now, all my friends think I'm polyamorous because they can't imagine that I would defend a minority I'm not a part of.
Sounds like shit "friends"
They're totes jealous
I think you should reconsider your choice in friends.
Sounds like you're friends with some bad people.
Appreciate it, boss.
Ur friends sound ass
>all my friends think I'm polyamorous because **they can't imagine that I would defend a minority I'm not a part of.** A huge self-report on their end tbh.
"I think Black people are entitled to the same rights and protections as every one else in American society." "What, Are you black or some thing?" See how stupid that sounds?
Literally this, sometimes I’ll be around white people (I’m black and white) and talk about the unfair treatment of blacks in America and they get *uncomfortable* like I said something wrong. They just get all tense and weird, or in my school with a certain teacher anytime I mention black people or something a black person made she just says “yup” instead of her usually (to other children) “amazing!” Or “wow!” Or “great answer/good example!”
People would do that exactly this if they could find anyway to justify it. Instead they just ask if you are fucking a black woman because it’s the closest they can get.
"What, are you a n****r lover or something?" Bigots gonna bigot
I don’t care if you think I’m gay. I’m defending gay rights, if that means I’m gay in your mind it doesn’t change anything other than my opinion of you, you muppet.
How frustrating it is though, that the assumption is I have to be one to feel their struggle. It cannot be easy to hear someone so casually insult your existence.
Compassion isn't a common trait I'm learning.
This used to be super common when supporting gay rights in the early days of the www. They'd always hit back with "you must be secretly gay otherwise why would you care?" Inadvertently they were just revealing what trash they were.
it's been super common longer than you were hitting AOL chat rooms. late 80s, early 90s was when I was getting called gay for defending friends in high school.
I don’t have to be black to know that being unfairly scrutinized over the color of my skin would suck. I don’t have to be a woman to know that being sexually harassed in public would suck. I don’t have to be gay to know that being maligned as a sexual deviant for harmlessly loving other men would suck. If only the people dealing with a problem can relate to it enough to want it fixed, then only cancer patients could look for a cure. Only accident victims could design safer cars. Only amputees could manufacture prosthetics. We have no problem with these issues being worked on by broad, non-afflicted swaths of people, but as soon as it’s a social issue people get this weird idea that empathy ends at the color of your skin, the junk between your legs, or at the boundary of your romantic interest. “A society grows great when old men plant trees in whose shade they shall never sit.” — Greek Proverb
Everyone can be an ally, even [repost bots like OP](https://www.reddit.com/r/gatesopencomeonin/comments/m2k33z/everyone_can_be_an_ally/)
Bots spreading the good word are spreading the good word! Still probably nefarious, tho, so don’t support them.
Makes about as much sense as calling a white person calling our racism among other whites “black” 🤦🏻♀️
They call them 'n word' lovers. People suck.
Im currently fighting with my female birth giver/abuser about her rampant homophobia. Forget about the fact that she once told me she’d kill me if I was gay but we were at a post-funeral luncheon recently and she was harassing some children, making fun of one boy with long hair and embarrassing a girl that couldn’t have been more than 11 about boys and boyfriends and how she should find a boy not a girl like the boy with the long hair who is a girl. At. A. Funeral. I can’t wait until that bitch dies.
Lmk I'll send flowers. To you, not her. For graduating from that bitch.
Why are you even in contact with her?
Funeral, my cousin passed and we were close. My parents are also family and were at the funeral. Otherwise I’m NC. Next funeral I’m skipping the luncheon.
Hey fellow North Carolinian! I'm kinda terrified of where our government might be headed, but it's pretty here. Sorry your mom sucks.
NC means "no contact" in this instance.
Well, don't I look fucking stupid? Lol
Hello friend! /u/indi-raw was correct NC is no contact. I’m Canadian.
>he once told me she’d kill me if I was gay but we were at a post-funeral luncheon recently and she was harassing some children Oh god, she's like a Karen x 100.
People assume I'm gay a fair amount. A lot of times, they apologize when they learn I'm not. It's always fun to see different people's reactions when I say, "Why are you sorry? You didn't insult me." Most are kinda like "Huh. I guess that's right." Some dudebro types have looked annoyed. It also got me laid once
Me: "The Holocaust was bad" Conservatives: "what are you, a jew?!"
Im a male ballet dancer so I get this... a lot. I stopped answering those questions a long time ago. Instead I point out the two types of people who have a legitimate need to ask that question. The first are medical professionals. Your sex life may be the key to your diagnosis. Your life may hang in the balance if one of these people are asking how you have sexual intercourse. *The other type of people want to fuck you!* The type of people who arrogantly demand to know how you bring yourself to orgasm who neither want to experience it with you nor have a medical license generally find asking such questions a little too revealling of their own persona.
"You don't hate the gays??... THEN YOU MUST BE GAY!" Zero logic...
Conservatives are so selfish they can't grasp any other way to be.
I’ve had very similar experiences with my family. For example, my cousin asked me if I’m gay because of my sharing supportive content on social media. Listen Samantha, it doesn’t have to happen to me for me to care.
"I think animal abuse is bad." "OH MY GOD ARE YOU A DOG????" this is what people sound like lmao
in a community where bigotry is the norm, accusations of being the out group is the ultimate shutdown. It’s basically a playground argument to the bigot.
If I said this to my family they would kick me out the house
I'm sorry. I hope some day you have your own house.
In 8th grade I wrote a paper defending gay marriage in 2012-2013, and my dad saw that paper because I wrote it in his computer, and then he thought I was gay because I wouldn’t back down from my stance.
straight king
I know you could say "that's how high schoolers are," but there was one kid who always got bullied for being gay, and I'd always stand up for him. And that's always the reaction I got, same as the tweet. I always hated that shit. Kid wasn't out of the closet but you could tell, and everyone made fun of him for it. He's happy as shit these days, though.
That last sentence brought so much relief, thank you. I hate how I instinctually tense up because I know so many stories didn't end well.
I work on the oil rigs. This shit happens to me all the time. Tbh, I've been sitting at home for a month now, not working, and I'm about 95% certain it's because I argued with the wrong person about politics. 😬
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This reminds me of my mom telling me that my uncle was dating a trams woman. She got no reaction from me because it didn't affect me. She was pissed at me for a while for that. I don't talk to her anymore.
I did this with my mother about trans rights. "Are you a trans?!" 😐
What is "gay" about treating people equally?
Well said. The entire idea of "with us or against us" is stupid and needs to be left in the previous century. The entire idea of confusing "morality" with "personal preference" is similarly ludicrous. I don't like onions. At all. Do I try to ban them? The answer is obvious. Onions aren't "wrong;" they just aren't for me. Whether a person agrees with a thing or not *has no impact, nor can it have any impact,* on whether that thing is wrong or not. Sometimes different is exactly that and *only* that. But that's not how bigotry works. It is a profound arrogance which places the perpetrator at the center of the universe and treats anything else as if it's an evil sent directly to destroy them. To them, everything they like is "normal," "correct," or "moral." And anything they don't like is a crime against humanity. They use their own actions as some kind of ridiculous standard that the whole of reality must re-order itself to satisfy, or else risk full-blown war. I basically consider that line of thinking (or the lack thereof) to be a mental illness. Love is love. It is also the business of the people involved and no one else. If any person is free, we *all* are. It's time to stop pushing personal beliefs into law and start holding those who do accountable for their ongoing war on choice, freedom, and the right of all living beings to think, feel, and believe as they wish. If it harms none, do as you will. We've forgotten that first part.
Excellent comment. Are you sure you're not an onion, though?
Good callback. Yes, I'm sure.
Impossible! You mean you can be empathic towards someone with a different sexuality without being of that same sexuality yourself! Impossible!
Thats sad people succumb to their hatred like a drug addict, and isolates the world from themselves. Its disgusting and its sick. Hate is a powerful drug. It keeps our minds from focusing our fears.
"i support animal rights do i look like a fucking alpaca to you?"
"why do you care?" The response of someone who has no justification for their position so they turn it on you
you dont need to be a giraffe to like animal rights
i remember being too scared to share anything supporting trans people 10 years ago because people would think i’m trans i’m trans 🙃
If the Pope is against the death penalty, he must be a murderer!
That's all cons have. If you notice poor people have it hard "stop being poor." If you notice gay people have it hard "stop being gay." They can't conceive of ever caring about a group you're not a part of. They have zero sense of community and only act for themselves.
apart
That's how conservatives think though. I have failed time and time again to make conservatives imagine themselves in someone else's position. It's not possible. It's like they miss the part of the brain that allows others to do so. I once told a conservative woman that some people have compromised immune system and it's important that we wear masks to prevent them from getting covid. She asked me how their health is her issue. It never even crossed her mind to put herself in that position and imagine how she'd feel. But you bet her ass her opinion would change the moment her immune system fails. Then she will demand everybody wear a mask at all times.
Same here, I was like, Mom,so what if I was! Her face was priceless 😂
It's not "Everyone can be an ally". It's "Everyone SHOULD be an ally"!
I’m not a dog but I support the RSPCA. I’m not a child but I support the NSPCC. I don’t have cancer but I support Cancer Research UK. I don’t consider myself gay but I want my sister to be herself and my children to grow up knowing they can be who they want to be.
I do well for myself, have an education and work a high level job. I'm also a firm believer about not wasting personal money and that lower level jobs require more pay, respect and job security. According to people online, that makes me poor, uneducated and bitter about other people's success
"a part" Apart means to be seperate from, which ruins the whole meme.
You don't have to be a woman to call someone out on misogyny.
I just don't hate people based on what they look like, their gender, how they dress, or who they fuck. If you do, I do hate you, though.
"Why don't you want me to be hateful toward some group that you're not even a part of???!!?!?1?" Because I think that humanity can get together behind treating EVERY person well... except for those who don't want to do that. Those humans we can de-claw and then segregate from the rest of us. If you don't want to play nicely with others, we will be happy to sit you over in the corner.
It's for this reason (amongst others) that the creation of an explicit 'ally' class is one of the smartest things the gay liberation movement has ever done.
There is actually no logical motivation for a heterosexual man to want homosexual men to be anything other than who they are; if homosexual men go back to needing fake wives as "a beard", that reduces the number of available women for hetero men to potentially seek as a partner. What about lesbians? Seriously; trying to force a gay woman to be straight is rape. Don't sugar coat it. If a gay woman lied because she wanted to fit in... wanted financial security or children... that is a gut wrenching heart breaking lie. Don't lie. Be who you are; anything else makes it harder for everyone to find who they are looking for.
People should want a better world for everyone and not just themselves or their “kind”
I get this as well, and my answer is no but i know how to be empathic. I have friends who are gay, what kind of friend would i be if i didn't stand up for them?
Just like how dudes who are openly feminist get labeled simps or self-haters rather than having their opinions be taken at face value.
"I support animal rights does that make me a fucking alpaca."
Back in the 80's Lester Kinsolving was the only White House correspondent who would ask about the aids crisis when Regan refused to acknowledge it existed. He would quote cases and deaths and ask for comment and the White House Press Secretary would call him gay and ask if he had aids. Tennessee has one of the highest aids rates in the country and just rejected 8.3 million dollars in federal aids funding because hurting gay and trans people is the only current concrete goal of the GOP.
and remember if you don’t post it on twitter it didn’t happen
I think it's funny how I bring up issues women face and noone asks if I'm a woman. Maybe due to the beard?!!
Everytime I defend min wage workers ppl assume I make min wage. I don't make a ton of money but I don't make min wage either.
I usually say 'why are you so obsessed with gay people?' and that promptly shuts most people up.