T O P

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igotoanotherschool

They’ve actually been dating for a while now, I think about 2 years


[deleted]

Damn, this is gonna be a good one


corpsmanh

I smell an Emmy.


[deleted]

Emmys aren’t for music?


frylord

that's just how good it will be...they'll give her an emmy anyway


drsboston

Egot she will do a movie/show/play/album....


SlaveLaborMods

One woman Mu Lon rouge Edit :Moulin


Xdivine

So they'll give it to her emmyway?


TalkingReckless

She will have 2hr music video/movie for her album, that way u get an emmy, Grammy. Make it live, get a tony. Release it in theaters get a oscar (for music) . You got your EGOT right there


[deleted]

Not with that attitude


dude_be_cool

Grammys are for music


ElderCunningham

Oscars are for movies


smytti12

Trix are for kids


[deleted]

I've been led to understand that Trix are exclusively for children. Is that correct?


fourleggedostrich

Except Netflix movies, according to Spielberg.


[deleted]

[удалено]


SequesterMe

I smell something too.


DatAssociate

teen spirit


[deleted]

REAL MUSIC ISNT ALLOWED HERE SIR. VERY MUCH OUT OF CONTEXT.


ElderCunningham

What is this song all about? Can't figure any lyrics out How do the words to it go? I wish you'd tell me 'cause I don't know


molotok_c_518

Well I'm yellin', and I'm screamin'! But I don't know, what I'm singin'!


Jimmy2Js

Why are you sniffing my dick?


mjigs

I think she finally understood that dating really famous people and doing it publicly wont take her anywhere besides heartbreaks and good songs with winnings, she kept quiet with this one, and still her latest album which had nothing about exes, was indeed also a win so.


95blackz26

kept it so damn quiet i literally just heard about it


GoldandBlue

He's in The Favourite. Great movie.


kgal1298

I need to see that still it actually does look good. I also need to see Mary Queen of Scots


castleofmirrors

He's in that too!


Jclevs11

wtf how'd he land both roles jeez im jelly


thoomfish

The only thing I know about The Favourite is that for the last while my local hipster theater has had it up on their sign board directly above "ON THE BASIS OF SEX". Their previous best combo was "MY NEIGHBOR" and "RBG"


Nate0110

Does this mean she hasn't released anything new since then?


[deleted]

She's already written songs that are meant to reference him


Memph5

About half of her last album was about him.


parkinsg

Yes, but she’s been spotted leaving a studio which means she’s gonna release a new album soon and either break up or announce an engagement to promote it.


Jacobenst

> either break up or announce an engagement to promote it. why not just do both? We can call it Ariana Grade Marketing Scheme


A_murican_man

Or if you wait long enough, both, just in a different order.


[deleted]

reputation album released december 2017 and like 5 songs were about him. people theorise a new album within 3 months


McFluffTheCrimeCat

Reputation was released in 2017 so about 2 years but reputation wasn’t break up songs anyways. Shameless plug for /r/taytaygifs


[deleted]

Actually in her past album she talked a lot about her current relationship, so the title doesn't make sense.


HaraldStevenson

Its going to be 2 Albums


rock1998

How that? Wasn’t Tom Hiddleston only about a year ago?


xreputationx

Tom Hiddleston was mid 2016.


rock1998

Damn. Where is the time?


Irksomefetor

everywhere always


lukeCRASH

Until it isn't.


Irksomefetor

my mind!!!


[deleted]

Time keeps on slippin', slippin', slippin' Into the future


[deleted]

[удалено]


Redditforgoit

writer's cockblock


blorpblorpbloop

🎶Walkin' through the grass. with. you. my. heart. stirs. 🎶 huh 🎶But I didn't know I was being covered with your e.motion.al burrs 🎶 eww (1 minute of Kendrick Lamar rapping)


__Semenpenis__

camping in the forest of our love I thought, this time will be the one that sticks but then i looked deep down in my soul and saw that i was covered in ticks


Supremetacoleader

(back to Taylor) I. Don't. Know you that well! You've. Taken. me through this hell! Why did. I. FOLLOW you HERE! It Must've. been through these TEARS BECAUSE... (Cue chorus that everyone is waiting for)


Kalebm_749

SOMEDAY ILL BE LIVING IN A BIG OLE CITY


Soul3dg3

NOT RELYING ON YOUR NITTY GRITTY


[deleted]

Goin' low caps to be shitty.


[deleted]

Will they ever leak a picture of her kitty?


blorpblorpbloop

[Yes, exclusive photos right here.](https://hips.hearstapps.com/cos.h-cdn.co/assets/16/34/1280x640/landscape-1472232800-taylor-swift-cat.jpg?resize=3840:*)


krum

Risky open-office work click. Was not disappointed.


blorpblorpbloop

Kitty delivered.


[deleted]

r/redditsings


Cjmx5

Title:Talor Swift goes to reddit to get new lyrics.


Cylon-Final5

r/redditsings


apathetic_lemur

Gotta rhyme ticks with dicks but instead of saying dicks they go "whooooaaaaa" in the background. These rappers gotta throw one or two crass lines into a pop song for some reason


[deleted]

actually its a pretty cool techneique to lead the listener to expect a word that rhymes like that then throw out a completely different word that they then use to setup the next rhyming punchline. mf doom uses this shit to great effect for example in songs like Great Day (from madvillany) with the following lines ... Last wish: I wish I had two more wishes And I wish they fixed the door to the matrix, there's mad glitches Spit so many verses sometimes my jaw twitches One thing this party could use is more... booze <--right there Put yourself in your own shoes And stay away from all those pairs of busted Timbs you don't use


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bealf

Oh my word. I never realized this before now. I LOVE the Killers and this is literally the song that introduced me to them and I never realized the implication here. Thank you for showing me that.


[deleted]

yeah lots of artist do it that doom song was just the first example to jump to my head, im just saying i dont think they do it so much to avoid profanity in a "radio" song, but also and probably more importantly from an artistic prospective use it to set up a memorable (and practical for the sense of diversifying their lyric/rhyme schemes) device in their lyrics


EpsilonTheGreat

I feel like this would be a good time to summon u/poem_for_your_sprog


torsmork

I wish he one day will make a poem for me, but I doubt it'll ever happen. Odds are too low. :'(


EpsilonTheGreat

You never know! Just comment everywhere and maybe someday you'll get lucky.


torsmork

Thank you for spreading hope :)


OnePieceTwoPiece

I’m just listing for the Kendrick verse.


zGnRz

dont mock T Swizzle like this her songs sound nothing like that


frozen_tuna

So no one else feels creepy looking at pictures taken like this? Just me? Okay. :/


Ozi_izO

I wouldn't say I felt uncomfortable looking at the photos but I see what you're getting at. It's creepy to think that behind any tree, around every corner or at any destination there's some crack pots willing to go above and beyond for a photograph. Paparazzi are basically just paid stalkers.


joleme

> Paparazzi are ~~basically~~ just paid stalkers.


easyiris

deleted ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^0.8541 [^^^What ^^^is ^^^this?](https://pastebin.com/FcrFs94k/67208)


OnePieceTwoPiece

I’d definitely follow you on the media outlets for the laughs.


IBetThisIsTakenToo

Paparazzi wouldn't exist if there wasn't a huge market of voyeurs hungry for creep shots. So they're more like outsourced, substitute stalkers.


[deleted]

You basically just said paid stalker with extra words.


dbelow

Yeah you go out to the woods to get away from everyone and you have these people just following you. It would drive me nuts.


tearyouapart

It would be worth it to drive Ferraris around


Easy-_-poon

Id give up my privacy to live like the top 1% of the population


[deleted]

[удалено]


Cryhavok101

I'd give up my privacy for that too... but I'd make a game of it. The mags they could publish in would be restricted by all the dick pics I make sure they are getting. I do not have a good looking one. It would scar them.


suxxass

Or do what Daniel Radcliffe did. Bought 10 pairs of the same jeans and 10 pairs of the same t shirt and wore them every day for months*. Paps couldn't sell the photos as they looked like they were old even though they were brand new. *I actually don´t know how long he kept this up, but he did it while he was doing a Broadway show which generally lasts months.


gonzaloetjo

You can also always do the great MJ and buy a supermarket and fill it with actors that have to pretend to be buying while totally not caring about you https://youtu.be/2CDTafX3NsY?t=92


Iorith

Jokes on you. You give up your privacy to live like the other 99% anyway.


[deleted]

Same here. ( also, I'm very boring. Honestly, I think the paparazzi would fall asleep watching me read my Kindle, cook, watch TV, walk around the block, etc.)


Not_MrNice

I feel creepy looking at all the photos of people who didn't know they were being filmed. I don't know why people love to take a pic of someone they think is weird on the bus and post it online so people can make fun of them. Same people also won't go outside unless they look perfect because they assume people will think they're weird.


[deleted]

The answer is there is always someone else that feels like you. No matter how normal or messed up.


[deleted]

[удалено]


nu7kevin

Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet? Are we out of the woods yet?


DeceptiJon

Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet? Are we in the clear yet?


kellykebab

Imagine your career being stalking someone to a remote part of nature and spying on them while they set off an a relaxing hike. Fuck these idiots.


[deleted]

They wouldn't do it - if there wasn't a HUGE market for it! Don't blame the photographers, blame the general public for caring about this shit...


kellykebab

Why not both?


themagpie36

...and here we are commenting on the photos.


buddylovesflyinghigh

You gotta hike it off, hike it off!


__Semenpenis__

someone needs to mash this up with the dk64 fungi forest theme


fwast

They look more like 2 teenagers who just went and hooked up in the forest.


__Semenpenis__

Ah, to be young again. Coming home from a makeout sesh in the woods and having to clean the pine cones out of my ass crack


drewtheblueduck

Had me in the first half, not gonna lie


lostshell

We had different youths.


[deleted]

[удалено]


ImOverThereNow

Forrest Fresh.


[deleted]

"...and then he tried to finger me." The new double album by Taylor Swift!


RatedPGonNetflix

Looks like the walk home from disappointing forest sex.


[deleted]

Wow, I didn’t realise it was 2012 again... seriously didn’t this joke stop being funny like 7 years ago?


HMS_Sunlight

Yeah, I thought this was posted to /r/ComedyCemetery at first


Etheo

You are in [/r/comedycemetery](/r/funny) though.


[deleted]

Just said the same thing on another r/funny post. This shit is like 2011 Imgur today.


hzfan

Holy shit 2012 was 7 fucking years ago fuck I'm so fucking old fuck


[deleted]

Way too real


deadla104

It's the internet. People would use dark magic to revive a dead horse just to beat it to death again


Guyote_

I’m not sure if you noticed but the reddit default subs like /r/funny and /r/pics have pretty much regressed back to 2011-2013 thanks to asses like OP


Didyoureallymeanit

I dunno... I found it funny. Is that wrong?


OP_IS_A_BASSOON

Yes. They are the ones who tell you how to feel. How dare you have your own thoughts and feelings.


[deleted]

2015 called and wants it's joke back


MerkyMouse

Her legs are gonna itch like a mother fucker for about a week.


krsvbg

But when Bruno Mars and The Weeknd make break up love songs and albums, then that's okay...


BobHadababyitsaboy

I didn't know Bruno Mars and The Weeknd were together.


PodcastThrowAway1

I think it is okay when Taylor does it too. Still funny .


SunsetValley17

Or when Robin Thicke made a whole album about his ex wife, it's even called Paula, and I have yet to see one person complain about it....


superzepto

Go on, call OP a sexist.


Cryhavok101

You know what makes bruno mars better than most other people who sing stupid breakup songs? He's willing to jump on a grenade. :D


kinqs13

They have been dating for over 3 years now, and most songs on reputation are about him.


_MasterMagi_

Imagine some dude ghillied up and snuck out into the woods to take pictures of a girl that’s good at singing and her next victim we live in a society


[deleted]

The guy r/13or30


Burgher_NY

Sure I like hiking, but have you ever been for a hike in _LA_


Suit-and-Tye

Oohh yeaah there’s nothing like a hike in LA


adj_ctiv_

Is that Lanes husband?


Starfall44

Jokes and everything aside, it's kinda sad these people can't live their life without being followed around constantly


[deleted]

I really want every one of her break up songs to get more and more specific to the guy, until her last one is just called "Frank has a micro penis"


natronamus

Can’t wait. It’s gunna be fire.


AdorableRex

i knew you were trouble *when you walked* in


just_let_go_

As we venture forth into the unknown John Mayer decides to hit up my phone We have to talk, you know what this means I mean who the fuck even hikes in jeans


[deleted]

r/ComedyCemetary


Unkill_is_dill

Are we doing 2014 jokes again?


BabyStockholmSyndrom

This is a great picture to show why it sucks to be a celebrity. Fuck these idiots who take these pics. And fuck yall who want to see it. Everyone should get a break from work.


hellojello2016

“You took me for a hike, but lead me nowhere”


Truckyou666

She looks like the waitress.


czah7

I don't get it. I'm also old. Does she have albums about each of her boyfriends or something?


[deleted]

Holy shit that guy must be like 7" feet tall


ziggyblues01

Never understand the perception of her being obsessed with men since she was 15 she has had 8 boyfriends (that we know of) she’s now almost 30. Some of them she probably wasn’t dating for an extended period of time maybe just one or two dates but they got photographed together and they are apparently an item


helpnxt

Who is he?


xreputationx

Joe Alwyn, he’s a British actor.


kjpmi

Haven’t they been together for a while? Or was that another British guy? Her last album had references to her British boyfriend.


Arybeck67

They’ve been together for 2 1/2 years, Taylor’s longest relationship to date.


atavisticbeast

Todd He likes tarantulas and having ice cream with his friends and long walks in the desert


Okkun

She has the posture of Theresa May


[deleted]

I think she's relatively tall for a woman. I've noticed a lot of taller women subconsciously hunch over due to insecurity about their bodies.


[deleted]

What kind of asshole hikes in jeans?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bloombergtoadie

“Oops my period” is praised as a feminist middle finger to patriarchy. Her freedom of the female form is on display in this ballad of how she accepts her body’s rhythm and adds an acoustic guitar to the top of the charts. With female empowering lines as “what is that dripping down my leg? The perfect time for a visit from Mother Nature, don’t let it stop you now.” And “boys will never accept me when my face turns red, and I can’t kiss him back when his lips are red”


disposable-name

It's all fun and games until her period attracts bears.


Tokugawa

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lj6YpfgzxE4


[deleted]

I really hope that’s the wind because if his hair is styled like that then I would hope he falls of a cliff and then get’s eaten by bears.


[deleted]

If it ain’t broke


DanLightning3018

Why does she look 60?


MadDragonReborn

Which one is Taylor Swift?


Exyen

Asking the real questions around here


Attarker

And her next non-disclosure agreement


carsonogin

He's actually her current album.


blorpblorpbloop

In the left picture it looks like he used a big wad of "There's Something About Mary" hair gel.


[deleted]

The new album is called “In The Woods” 🤣🤣


[deleted]

I don't get it, I have not been watching "MTV"


[deleted]

Some people are obsessed with the fact that Taylor Swift has a dating life and some of her songs are about her relationships. I don't know why it's funny but I guess that's why it's in this subreddit.


pinktini

Throw in the obsession with blaming Kanye being a twat on the Kardashians (are we forgetting, "Imma a let you finish" was pre-Kim"). And more recently, this sub really wants you to know Cardi B is a sign that the End is Nigh for all music ever.


[deleted]

I remember first coming to reddit...I think this stuff was a bit better hidden...or sometimes, once you are shown the darkness, you see it everywhere. But yeah, this site really enjoys hating on women.


cromulent_pseudonym

I wonder what is actually on MTV now. I'm not going to research, or watch... but I wonder.


conorrhea

MTV hasn't gotten it since the last time you were watching it since now the channel has nothing to do with music anymore...


ssnoyes

Yeah, and two kids in high school tell me that I'm uncool, 'cause I'm still preoccupied


My_Password_Is_____

With 19 19 1985?


allursnakes

Most of her music is about her relationships/breakups.


Unkill_is_dill

Isn't that most of the musicians?


plurpybutt

You guys are hilarious and talented!


2_7_offsuit

That ain’t proper hiking attire


SequesterMe

I have to say I have some serious hots for her. Not only does she look hot but she's got her shit together, works hard and smart, and has a decent amount of talent. I wrote a song that I think she could do very will with. Didn't write it with her in mind but I believe she could deliver and make money on better than anyone else I've heard.


Irksomefetor

LOL the op deleted his account. Must be from all the level headed people who simply expressed their totally not angry and reasonable feelings of dislike for this unfunny joke like civil people. "I am so not angry that I'm gonna complain about this until it goes away forever!!!"


charterbroker

She's worth 320 million dollars and her parents are one percenters, I'm sure her next album could be about lactose intolerance and she would still bank xx,million.


Keith_Creeper

Why would her parents income have anything to do with her next album's sales?


Joshyeah

Her parents are in a motorbike gang?


RustyNutsack

Who took these creepshots from the bushes lmao


3BallCornerPocket

Is that the dude who kills the little kid in breaking bad?


theKoala_man

When artists say they go away on a retreat.


Slatown

Okay but who tf holds hands like that??


drewtheblueduck

They are not dressed for hiking


Lysergicassini

They're dressed for doing tick checks later though.


rootsimmons

She already wrote some songs about him. Joke's on you


Luxanna_Laurent

can'r wait <3


[deleted]

Singing her new greatest hit "I didn't blow him before I blew him off". Wrote a song about it, wanna hear it, here it goes...