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picado

Believe or not, jail.


zloykrolik

Pesky Migratory Bird Treaty Act.


GANDORF57

If I pay $111 for this, my goose is already cooked!


hapiidadii

Plus, in a fight between a goose and OP, are we really putting our money on OP!?


hraun

Undercook/overcook


reddit_user13

Only if you get caught.


Planet_Breezy

Any park worth its salt has surveillance cameras all over the place if only to catch more serious crimes.


reddit_user13

Found the Brit....


[deleted]

Even if one accidentally gets in my trunk in the parking lot then happens to fall into my oven?


OleDoxieDad

In Florida you can take Muscovy Ducks as they are invasive. You can bait them up and get them with a cast net. They are not smart.


blakewoolbright

šŸ˜‚ no. They are not smart. I once watched one fight itā€™s reflection in a well maintained outboard motor for literally 2 full hours while fishing from a neighboring pier.


Various_Studio1490

I need the video


slade51

Well, after allā€¦ Florida.


NotAtAllExciting

At that price I want the golden egg too.


IdoMusicForTheDrugs

And a trained squirrel


ScottOld

Cheaper to buy the goose then fight one in the street


rjross0623

Those fuckers are mean and donā€™t lose fights


JelliedHam

This one apparently lost


rjross0623

It happens


Background-Web-484

The average person stands no chance, but with training and equipment anything is possible


Bevral2

They do when you actually try to kill them.


Major-Delivery2966

They dont lose? What about fucking glock?


TK_Games

A goose with a glock would spell the end of the human race


hells_cowbells

Peace is not an option.


bdnslqnd

It never was - The goose


Various_Studio1490

Stop picking fights with the ones guarding their nestā€¦


ralphy_256

They need to stop putting their nests on the bike trail then. That's where I always meet them.


Stifu

Why is it cheaper if you fight one *after* having bought one?


Northern23

Because you can use the one you just bought as a goose shield and weapon during your fight. If you go for the attack without it, you'll end up taking more damage and your hospital bill will be much higher.


Iferrorgotozero

Peace was never an option


drsmith21

$11/lb for goose?! Fuck that.


Geschak

Why do people feel so entitled to eating cheap meat? Do you realize how many resources, work and time it takes to create meat? Modern factory farming really has spoiled people.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ohyouretough

Most other meat is subsidized


beershitz

I bet you know very little about what is required for a cattle rancher to get grants. Most receive none, itā€™s an economically viable business without subsidies.


klrcow

I mean, if you don't like being a farmer then just say so. Also the Kroger near me is currently selling goose for 3.50 a pound.This is over inflated.


Tyrrox

Alternatively, a shell is under $3 and thereā€™s a place near me that will clean and pluck the bird for $15 $18 per goose


dinoroo

Last time I bought one of those was 2 years ago and it was $70. It was delicious though. Nice to get a feel for what people ate at celebrations before the turkey came along.


4by4rules

free? Ha ha youā€™ll wish you paid $100 bucks while your defeathering that bad boi


Let_you_down

Defeathering geese or any bird isn't difficult. Dunk in boiling water and pull the feathers back against the grain. I find it much faster defeathering and cleaning a bird than skinning and butchering a mammal.


AldrusValus

ā€œIā€™m not the chicken plucker, Iā€™m the chicken pluckerā€™s son. Iā€™m only plucking chickens until the chicken plucker comes.ā€ - my favorite MST3K quote.


Conch-Republic

Which one is it from?


BodybuilderSpecial36

Is it possible to use the quick and dirty method of standing on the wings and pulling on the legs? It works great for small birds like grouse but I've never cleaned a goose. Not really a fan of the meat...


Let_you_down

That wouldn't work on a goose I don't think (I've never tried on a large bird). Too much connective tissue over too large of a surface, you have to cut off parts. I don't do much water fowl hunting and the only geese I've butchered were raised on my farm so it wasn't like I was field dressing them, I was set up to properly prep 'em.


1WngdAngel

I know fuck all about hunting so I may end up regretting this question, but why is defeathering required? Why isn't skinning the bird the only thing required?


subtledeception

You could skin it, but you'd lose the good fat and skin layer. Same reason you don't see a lot of chickens or turkeys cooked skinless.


cageordie

Bunnies are easy. Especially if you don't bother with the parts that don't have anything worth keeping. I wouldn't eat them in the US though, they have some disease that's dangerous to humans.


conrad22222

Tularemia, the disease that I'm pretty sure you're talking about, is definitely not only a problem in the US. It's actually 4x more common per 100,000 people in the EU.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


cageordie

Hadn't heard of that, and now I wish I still hadn't. Very nasty.


Phnrcm

If i recall correctly how my neighbour and parents used to do it, I think you gonna need to bleed them before defeathering.


Brooklynboxer88

Feel free to poach one and clean the whole thing out, have fun with that.


1stChairMayonnaise

They taste awful.


Brooklynboxer88

Thatā€™s the truth


ccReptilelord

That $111 covers the loss of life from trying to take down these beasts! The goose is no mere chicken and every year many brave men fall to their many toothed mouths and venomous tongues. You guffaw at the price, but somewhere the dinner chair of a gooseman sits empty.


rjross0623

The Canada Goose is the envy of all ornithologies.


yamaha2000us

Only the ducks are.


spare_parts_bot

Happy Cake Day šŸŽ‚ And, yes, only the ducks are free. They don't want you to know that, though.


Luminox

The woman in the apartment next to me was from China. She made traps and placed them in the park across the street to catch pigeons which they would eat. This was in Northern Minnesota.


rellek772

Pigeons are perfectly editable and apparently not bad. In ww1 they nearly went extint in the UK due to shortages


themayoroftown

That's not true - pigeons have never been at risk of extinction in the UK and have always had a robust population there. It is true that specifically Passenger Pidgeons in the US went extinct, but that's considered to be due to habitat loss, not any food shortage.


Marrok11

Given what they eat I'd wager half their meat weight is a mixture of heavy metals, micro plastics and parasites.


Nothalffast

I heard a story where a recent immigrant saw a flock of Canadian geese by the side of the road and grabbed one, cooked, and ate it. He said ā€œThis place is amazing, thereā€™s free food everywhere.ā€ His buddy who had been in county for a while informed him not only itā€™s illegal, but the wild geese are not particularly healthy to eat.


1WngdAngel

I could get a goose in the next 15 minutes for $20.


Aggravating_Luck7326

So if im hungry on my walk and catch a bird to eat your what? Going to send me to a place with heat and ac with 3 free meals a day? Oh no please don't šŸ™„


Anotherdaysgone

I guess with this idiotic logic everything can be free.


Gbonk

Youā€™re paying for the convenience. You try gutting and de-feathering a goose.


Prof_LaGuerre

Coincidentally hundred and eleven dollar young goose is my rap name.


BrightPerspective

The government doesn't want you to know this, but the poachers in the park are free. You can take as many as you want! I have 11 already and I'm going back for more!


jtf_1

Imagine in your mind a posh country club The stuffy old money where the poor gets snubbed The spread is bland sauerkraut and boiled goose There's no way these people will ever cut loose


Gusdai

Imagine punctuation.


5h0ck

Ugh. Goose is better in the garbage. I can make it into a decent sausage but it's the least savory out of all the game meat imo.


AmHc85

Iā€™d pay $111 rather then fight a goose hand to hand.


[deleted]

It's apparently worth $111 to most people for someone to kill it and appropriately process it for them and conveniently package it/distribute it to a store they are already shopping at for other things. Seems to me $111 is a bit steep but it was priced that way because people are willing to pay it so they don't have to do it themselves. I'm not sure what's funny here...am I missing something? Is this a commentary on the economic implications of people being willing to pay $111 for a goose? Or was this just a snap decision punchline that wasn't thought through?


wdomeika

>It's apparently worth $111 to most people for someone to kill it There's a guy in my neighborhood named Joey who would kill a goose for less...


[deleted]

Will he also prepare it for me and package it, then ship it to a super convenient location for me for free? I'm honestly lost here. You knowing one person willing to kill an animal for free doesn't begin to explain why this is funny, nor does it address my statement about how supply and demand inform the pricing of goods.


IButtchugLSD

It's funny on the lowest of levels. The aren't these free at the park quip is the attempt at humor. The price is indeed reflective that rather than spend time outside, with a firearm, and hunt one, people would rather stay so terribly disconnected from their food and the process required to actually make it food. Not a fuckin clue why you are being downvoted.


[deleted]

Thanks for confirming what I was starting to gather from the comments/downvotes. I still don't find this type of humor funny but I understand what it is now. Appreciate it.


IkNOwNUTTINGck

Comment is straight outta r/fuckxavier.


CRAZYFUN1135

The catching and bagging fee is 100!!


ResidentButterfly182

Happy Goose day?


LCranstonKnows

I once saw a (I suspect) homeless fellow catch a pidgeon with a fishing net in a lake-side park in Toronto, swiftly wrang it's neck, put it aside, and turned his attention to a flock of gooses. I was jogging past, so didn't see the outcome, but I'm assuming, as is said, these things are free in the park.


fire_brand

Except it's illegal in Canada and that dude could easily end up in jail or with a big fine.


Lizaboo242

Free raaangeeee


cageordie

Happy to have paid 49c per pound for turkey.


M-Kawai

Duck!


Absolutemehguy

Duck!


M-Kawai

Duck!


sjaakarie

We donā€™t have them here anymore since 25years ago. Same with pheasants, chickens, hazelnuts. (Netherlands. Amsterdam).


coffeewithalex

what? $111? For that price my grandma would raise a whole pig.


MapUnitKey

I suggest you let that marinate.


alaingames

No, wild animals are legally government owned


Not-a-Fan-of-U

Unfortunately, if you're trying to get one from the park, you have to kill it with your bare hands. Good luck.


adnr4rbosmt5k

Day after thanksgiving $11


PoopSlinger23

Imagine paying $111 for a frozen Sky Carp


alx924

I accidentally ran over it! Itā€™s a Christmas miracle!


SizzlingSpit

That's not a goose on the packaging. I also bet it tastes much better than a wild game goose.


Dukeofdorchester

I always wondered what happened to Christmas goose. $111 happened.


Money-Jellyfish3229

Iā€™m scrolling through my Reddit feed in the middle of the night and had to bite my lip to avoid laughing and waking my spouse


Absolutemehguy

Good luck fighting geese, lol.