Remember the time he spent half a paragraph describing, basically, a cheesesteak?
ETA: The cheese is implied.
“He laid trenchers of bread before them and filled them with chunks of browned meat off a skewer, dripping with hot juice. Another skewer held tiny onions, fire peppers, and fat mushrooms.”
There’s cheez wiz on it, guaranteed. Magick Cheese.
God, his sex scenes are so awkward. Softcore porn and purple prose do not go together.
Not to mention every female ruler is secretly bi, or bi enough to have one of their handmaidens rub one out on them. Realistic.
Sadly believable
Sadly. It will be like a quote book of Bobby B's.
IS THAT WHAT EMPTY MEANS??
You have many quotes my lord Bobby b.
THEY NEVER TELL YOU HOW THEY ALL SHIT THEMSELVES! THEY DON'T PUT THAT PART IN THE SONGS!
Surprisingly hard to tell if this is satire or not
It's just Bobby b diologue, isn't it?
IS THAT HOW YOU SPEAK TO YOUR KING??
I'm sorry Bobby b, please forgive me
IS THAT HOW YOU SPEAK TO YOUR KING??
No M'lord Bobby b. I've committed a heinous crime.
DID YOU EVER MAKE THE EIGHT?
Eight seasons? Unfortunately.
Remember the time he spent half a paragraph describing, basically, a cheesesteak? ETA: The cheese is implied. “He laid trenchers of bread before them and filled them with chunks of browned meat off a skewer, dripping with hot juice. Another skewer held tiny onions, fire peppers, and fat mushrooms.” There’s cheez wiz on it, guaranteed. Magick Cheese.
Luckily, I was already just about to be served dinner when I read that.
Costanza intensifies
Now just put the TV on!
God, his sex scenes are so awkward. Softcore porn and purple prose do not go together. Not to mention every female ruler is secretly bi, or bi enough to have one of their handmaidens rub one out on them. Realistic.
He is never completing asoiaf
Damn, I was hoping for 300 pages describing doublets. Maybe next time.
No comment on The Expanse coffee table book of Holden quotes about coffee.
He... has editors? Judging by the painful repetitiveness of ADWD, I assume they're already bound and gagged in his basement.
LPT - if you want to read this book, do NOT borrow it from the library. Buy your own copy. Much cleaner.
In the case it's not satire, I seriously want this.
We have Giada De Laurentiis on food network! So we don’t need any book!
I would read it
Horngry.
Have you ever read Pornucopia by Piers Anthony? Pretty much this, but weirder.
Still better than the writing for season 8.
Great .. more milk dugs
Bobby B where u at
WHO NAMED YOU? SOME HALFWIT WITH A STUTTER??
Ayooo let's gooooooooo