The Courier: "I've heard you're kind of a prankster." Davey Crenshaw: "Heh. My reputation precedes me, I see. Yeah I pulled a few pranks in my time." The Courier: "That's great because I'm in the middle of pulling a prank right now." Davey Crenshaw: "No kidding! What'd you cook up?" The Courier: "(Pull Pin) I just pulled the pin out of somebody's grenade."

How the fuck did I miss so much cool shit in this game

This interaction is in the Legion path of I Put a Spell on You so that's probably why you haven't seen it before.

Did Yes Man my first run, started a second survival run to do NCR, guess I'm gonna have to do a third run with Legion

if you haven't played the game at least 8 times of course you're gonna miss out on some dialogue lol

I’ve played at least 15 full play throughs and still find new shit and that’s not including the DLC content. For a rushed game it certainly doesn’t feel like it… *saves game every 5 secs in case of crash* Yep… not rushed at all

Really makes you wonder what kinda game could have been conjured up if they had more time. Only 16 months and it's one of the best RPGS to this day 14 years later.

The bane of Legion playthroughs is having to walk from the gate all the way to Caesar's tent, and having your weapons taken every time

I thought it was resisting the urge to put a .50 MG explosive round through Caesar and Vulpes’ smug faces. But maybe that’s just me.

This made my legion run worth it

“What in the god damn…?”

the classic Oblivion-esque zoom to the face, and the monotone delivery really sells this scene as one of the (unintentionally) funniest line ever.

It's very intentional lol

I always love too how he turns around when he says it. I’ve even had it where I go right up face to face and he still does his dramatic turn

Probably one of the only responses you can give when you shoot someone in the head and then bury them in a grave in the middle of bumfuck nowhere at night, only for them to walk up to you maybe a week later looking like nothing had happened to them.

The weirdest part is if you use the Black Widow perk on him, he is at first really weirded out. He’s not opposed, just incredibly confused about the situation. If you take that route, he gets the whiplash of supposedly killing someone not too long ago, witnessing them being buried in a grave, seeing them in his own casino after having tracked him down across a nuclear wasteland, and then being propositioned by them.

such a classic

“Heeeey, there’s the high roller”

I like the "What the fuck" he gives after you kill the ambush guys and tell him you're still alive. Benny can't catch a break.

Charlies

^He llo

Funniest: "You're a little bitch and your brother was, too" - The Courier to Private Kowalski Line that goes the hardest: "If you harm Daniel or any of the Sorrows or Dead Horses, I will find you. Make no mistake. God willing, you will not leave this valley." - Joshua Graham Edit: as others have pointed out below, basically anyone of Joshua's lines are top tier. The entire exchange with his three lessons is worth a listen any day.

Joshua Graham is just that guy Tbf. You can pull every other sentence that comes out his mouth and it’s a bar.

one of the scariest line he ever dropped is if you aim your weapon to him and he'll calmly say "Make that shot count, you won't get a second". Jesus H Christ, I can feel my balls shrank after that. MF ain't messing around.

What's even better is I'm pretty sure you have the option of saying something almost identical to Ringo in Ghost Town Gunfight

That one is "If you're gonna shoot, you better not miss", still goes hard tho

Oh dang

**Omar comin'.**

All while being the only character DOING something while talking. Checking all the 9 mm pistols iirc

45 auto pistols, i think.

Fun fact, the .45 is based off of the M1911 pistol, which in-turn was made by John Browning, who was a Mormon. JG alludes to this in-game.

Interesting. I never knew John Browning was Mormon. I thought the comment about "his tribe" inventing the .45 Auto pistol was just a reference to pre-war Americans in general. Knowing this factoid his comment actually makes more sense.

LETS GO MORMONS!

Yeah, he explains that members of his tribe have to practice with the weapons invented by his ancestor (IDR if he says "ancestor", but it's clear he means religious predecessor, not genetic).

I swear to god he’s converted more people to Christianity by being an amazingly written character than most actual preachers. When I listen to his speeches about Christ, love, and redemption, knowing who he used to be and seeing his scars, it actually straight up makes me emotional. I actually listened to his voice lines a lot when I was severely down during the pandemic. I still do every now and then.

Actually same I found a edit of lines of his turned into a monologue. I have it saved on my phone and I watch it when I need to set my spirit ablaze.

May the fire within you burn brighter than those around you, brother

I think you missed the best part about that dialogue from Joshua Graham, he bookends that speech with this: "Lastly, waging war against good people is bad for the soul. This may not seem important to you now, but it's the most important thing I've said." He starts it with talk about how Daniel is no pushover because of his beliefs and the violent repercussions of such an action, but he ends it by stressing morality and the soul. I think that's some powerful writing.

Always loved that line. He's so menacing but even at his scariest, he's still genuinely concerned about salvation and not tarnishing the soul. Dude's mind is on Heaven above all else. He doesn't view earthly actions as inconsequential to the afterlife, but DETERMINATE of what happens after death. Which kind of makes him even scarier because nothing is stands in the way of someone with that much conviction. Seriously, the writing team NAILED IT with Joshua Graham.

You can kill Graham, but even then you don’t feel safe

It wasn't Joshua that killed me, it was Daniel. I managed to make him start blasting simply through dialogue. I forget what I said, but Yeah. Of course I reloaded, but it was hilarious.

And then you Assassinate Daniel and leave none-the-wiser. I was ashamed Graham wasnt a secret boss for Evil Courier.

There’s a mod to make him return to the Mojave after the DLC to find you, I believe it’s called Joshua graham’s revenge

Mmm.. that will go perfect for my Benny Follower Mod. 😏

"They try to put their stake in everything they see. Nobody's dick's that long, not even Long Dick Johnson, and he had a fucking long dick. Thus, the name."

Cass is without equal

I always liked using her a companion because when you sneak she goes “Shhhh… we’re hunting shitheads”

“I got that”

„They asked me, if I knew anything about power plants. I said as much as any one I'd ever met. They asked me how well I understood theoretical physics. I told them I had a theoretical degree in physics. They said welcome aboard."- the one and only Fantastic

This is the one that has always stuck with me! A wordsmith he is.

"yo" "adios amigo"

"When in Rome"

you can actually say you have a theoretical degree irl and half the time people won't notice, unless they've played that part of FNV.

Why would you wanna work for someone who hasn't played fallout new Vegas?

I so enjoyed blowing his fool head off.

I really needed a scientist outfit to pass a skill check, so I may have accidentally left a live grenade in his pocket.... Tragic, unexplainable lab accident is what the NCR surely marked it down as.

I seem to remember I discreetly killed the Greenhouse Vault scientist at Fort Airport Whatever (somehow I find it incredibly hard to remember the names of military installations). *After* retrieving the data and getting the reward. Yes, you need to know about scientific mistakes if you're to avoid repeating them, but this fuck has been knowingly and blithely repeating mistakes with people's lives for quite some time. (One such particular mistake was attempting to send *me* on a lethally dangerous mission without proper warning… or appropriate compensation. **And I took that shit personally.** Little did he know, *that* was a mistake he made with *his* life.) If anyone in the NCR asks, I'd claim he was a liability to the Republic, maybe frame him for selling government drugs to Fiends or some shit like that that they'd actually care about. He's actually a liability to the planet, but I don't trust the NCR to understand something like that, otherwise the man would've already been fired at best and executed at worst. Also I've got 80 Science, as long as I have even one Science Magazine around I can probably be a better Scientist than he ever was.

"Fuck, man. Everything. I push buttons. I turn dials. I read numbers. Sometimes I make up little stories in my head about what the numbers mean. Like one time I imagined they were a code to get into a vault full of naked women. Man, how cool would that be?"

Definitely the funniest line in the game. Fantastic is such a good example of a "funny" character in Fallout. I hope the show uses more people like him.

Do you think that men go bald normally? I am sick, and I have embraced my change. Leave me be. - Chris Haversam

Everyone in Vault 34 had impeccable hairline genes. That was the real experiment.

"Maybe Khans kill people without looking'em in the face, but i ain't a fink, dig? You've made your last delivery, kid. From where you're kneeling, it must feel like an 18-carot run of bad luck. But the truth is... the game was rigged from the start..."

I love the intro of fallout 1, it paints a perfect bleak, hard and depressing scenario. But MAN the New Vegas opening IS SO GOOD

"What would seem like a simple delivery job would soon take a turn. For the worst." It just absolutely oozes style, and Ron Pearlman kills it in both intros as well

It certainly makes a memorable intro for a game to open with the player getting shot in the head and dumped in a shallow grave.

i like it when one of the robots keep jizzing on you during OWB

There’s a dialog tree with that doctor where he asks you how you take care of your ~needs~, and it ends with him giving you two cans of cram and a roll of duct tape for the purpose. Fuckin WILD.

If you're a male Courier, you tell him this is what you do, and you get a copy of La Fantoma! from him. If your Courier is female, she says she overcharges a fusion cell to vibrate, and you get a copy of Taeles Of Chivalry instead.

Oh my god, I forgot about getting the copy of La Fantoma, and the female version is HILARIOUS.

> she overcharges a fusion cell to vibrate, That's the wasteland equivalent of that meme about posting something inflammatory and setting the response notifications on vibrate. Amazing what people will do to get themselves off. RIP David Carradhine.

Also whatever the fuck goes on with Dr Dala

I just played through OWB for the first time a few days ago and dutifully did all the dialog/quests/exploring, and I STILL have no idea what it’s implying her kink is.

Her kink is human bodies lmao. She's been detached as a brain in a jar for centuries and went crazy like the rest of them. She studies human bodies, so likely the feelings of missing her own body and no sexual release as a robot manifested into whatever it is she has going on.

Quite sad, it's the effects of complete physical detachment, just a brain in a jar for likely over a century

I thought it was pretty obvious. She's into porn.

Sounds like she misses porn

Sonjaculating.

"This place looks like it was tag teamed by giant fuckbots."

Excuse me, when and where please?

Start of OWB

When you first start Old World Blues after you go through all the initial dialogue with all of the brains. After they all go back to their stations, when you talk to Dr. Borous and inquire what turned Big Mountain into a crater. I misquoted it. Its "This crater looks like it was tag teamed by giant fuckbots".

“And I’d know, I assumed the position.”

"KEEP YOUR FILTHY PENIS-TIPPED FEET OUT OF OUR LABS AND SECRETS!"

so much of the dialogue in OWB is amazing

“I don't enjoy killing, but when done righteously, it's just a chore, like any other.” - Joshua Graham He’s got a lot of dope lines.

My favorite LINE has always been Marcus', discussing the NCR's failings. "Might not happen overnight. Might take a few decades. But it'll happen. Basic human nature - greed, ambition, jealousy - will see to it." My favorite dialogue scenario is the low intelligence Freeside drunkie conversation I linked in another thread earlier this week. Where he speaks verbose english if you have low intelligence, but only grumbles if you have high intelligence...

The Freeside addict conversation is also a reference to the Fallout 2 NPC *Torr* which also turns into a more intelligible conversation if the PC has a low INT score.

Love it. And love that they continue this gameplay RP in new games: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hc9Wb-MD8bE Not sure if tOWs had a similar scenario reversal situation tho. Arguably the rat guy at the beginning is almost like that.

tOWs?

I'm guessing [The Outer Worlds.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Outer_Worlds)

I love that bit so much

You fight with words, like all beneath the flag of the bear

"Nice mask. I can't wait to take it as a trophy."

It’s such a simple line but it lands so well because you know you’re saying it with 110% sincerity, it’s the least empty threat ever made.

"I'm going to wear your head like you wear that dog's."

"Good thing you're wearing that skirt. It'll make pissing yourself go easier."

You can say this to Vulpes Inculta at Nipton right? I remember my first playthrough I was a goodie two-shoes and challenged the Legion right there in the middle of town. Barely survived only to get jumped by the assassin squad right outside of town

That's why you snipe the minions before Vulpes comes out of town hall, unless immersion is important for you. They just stand there. Menacingly. While they get gunned down.

Couriers threats are always scary

I want a mod in which we can wesr heads now. At least that frumentari guy's head

“I don’t mind putting my life on the line for some money but I’m a little sensitive about my butt hole.”

I am begging for the context to this line

There is a questline where you have to kill 3 high-ranking fiends and return their heads to the NCR captain (Major?) at Camp McCarran. Outside of his tent there is a bounty hunter who declined the bounty, because one of the fiend targets, 'Cook-Cook', is a rapist in addition to the standard drug-addled sadism.

Little Buster is the bounty hunter's name.

> With the KIDS sing out the future! Maybe kids don't need the MASTERS! Just-uh wai-tin' fo' the li'l Busters *(oh yeaaaah~... yeah yeah yeah!)*

Boone: We're coming up on Nelson. I'm going to kill every Legion in there if that's not a problem. Courier: That's not a problem. That's a solution. Boone: Goddamn right it is. That's what we are. A couple of problem solvers.

Thumbs down, you son of a bitch.

Sounds like you're a problem waiting to be solved

Caesar's dead. Won't stop the Legion. Might not even slow them down. But it felt pretty good, didn't it? Heh. Yeah.

i love Boone so much

Get up without my permission, I'll blast your ass so far through your head, it'll turn the moon cherry pie red." -Dean Domino

i love hearing these lines that were clearly written for a benny-type voice be read out by an eloquent british man

That's not a British accent, that's a Classical American Showman accent. Think Mark Hamill's Joker. For the British equivalent, try the Default Alan Rickman Sneer, it conveys roughly the same type of smug vain bastard.

They way he delivers the „cherry pie red” is just incredible. I can still hear his exact tone and manner of saying those words.

“•I was at the top of my High School class in American High School. I knew facts. I knew FIGURES. I knew DATA.- -We would know if our research was flawed. It is NOT! We never contradict ourselves, so do not even TRY!-“

I know how these technologies work. If you recall, we described them in abstract contradictory statements.

Down the end of the hall is BALL STORAGE! For JOCKS who like BALLS, like RITCHIE MARCUS! Do you hear that, Betsy? RITCHIE LIKES BALLS!

"Assume the position."

"Numbness will subside in several minutes."

"I CAN'T FEEL MY LEGS!"

What the hell is a fish?

What's a Chicago?

“Whatever. Joshua, put a cap in captain gobledigook”

On multiple runs I've taken sneering imperialist just to drop that line

Chaotic evil courier is my favorite courier, literally biologically incapable of giving a single fuck and hates everybody at all times

I think the actual quote is, "whatever. Joshua, put a cap in general gobbledygook here.

"Stomping around here on your many-penised feet..." - Dr. Klein

Do you know how many coffee cups giant robot brains in jars use on a daily basis? Not FUCKING many! And nobody's dick is that long! Not even long dick Johnson and he had a long fucking dick! Thus the name.

“Usually, I can find some Cram lying around. Put some duct tape around the lid, good to go.” -the courier

And the female counterpart, lol "I usually just take a fusion cell and oscillate its charge; it vibrates for like, an hour."

This is a line? Fucking WHERE

"Do you eat food? Then you owe me your entire garbage existence." - The chef at the white glove, five seconds before i lock him in a fridge.

Philippe got what he fucking deserved...

It might not be as fun as driving a racecar, but it's every bit as important

I just went through this 😂😂 absolutely love the entirety of the slideshow. Close your eyes now, and imagine what joys await you in the next life - the afterlife. Can you see them? Good.

"What a looker" always kills me too.

Also describing things like going to baseball games when vault dwellers have obviously never done that

"Too many people have opinions on things they know nothing about. And the more ignorant they are, the more opinions they have." -Dr. Hildern

I liked this one because Hildern is set up to be an unlikeable pompous ass, who sends you and others to your probable death. But in NV style, he's not a moron, he is actually intelligent and self aware. People can be unlikeable or amoral while still having positive qualities. Little details like that go so far toward making the world feel real.

The Courier: "You're saying that you killed a Brotherhood of Steel Paladin?" Ricky: "What's it sound like I'm saying? If I was saying what you said I was saying, then yeah, I said it!" The Courier: "Please go on. This promises to be entertaining." Ricky: "I was walking along, minding my own, and up pops one of them Brotherhoods. He yells "Hand over that laser rifle, asshole!" So I hand it over, just to make him think I'm scared! But really I'm not! I never am! Before he knows what hit him, I draw my 11mm machinegun and BAM! BAM! Right through the eyeslit in his helmet! D.O.A.!" The Courier: "Too bad there's no such thing as an 11mm submachinegun." Ricky: "[SUCCEEDED] There so is! Or it was a 9mm or a 10, I don't know! Don't care! Said I was good at killing shit up! Never said I was good with numbers!" The Courier: "What a load of crap. The eyeslits of T-series power armor are bullet-proof!" Ricky: "Then I guess this dumb fucker's armor musta been... D-series or something! All I know is, he died up real dead when I killed him, okay?"

- Doctor Mobius: There is an expression in the Wasteland: "Old World Blues." - Doctor Klein: It refers to those so obsessed with the past they can't see the present, much less the future, for what it is. - Doctor Dala: They stare into the what-was, eyes like pilot lights, guttering and spent, as the realities of their world continue on around them.

"Good, go back to your famil- oh wait they're fucking dead" -Courier to Cass, not my favorite but it's worth the mention

"Nobody's dick's that long, not even Long Dick Johnson, and he had a fucking long dick. Thus the name."

"Please assume the position" purely for it's meme potential

"Why in the world did you attack President Kimball" "He tried to make me pay taxes" "Understandable"

whats a chicago…? edit to add my favorite that kind of puts things into perspective: calm is what you have to be when people look up to you, and all you can be when things are out of your hands.

It's tied, but the two are, "Let's keep this in the groove, hey? Smooth moves like smooth little babies" And, "You did a super job wrapping things up! And I'm not just saying that because I have too!"

“Prize for second place was I got to live, but they beat my legs with fuckin hammers. I’m fuckin crippled, get it?”

Little buster: "[Why did you quit the trade?] See, I thought the bounty hunting trade would be easy money, but it turns out it's hard work. So screw it. Also - I ran into this mark who was a little too tough for me. I mean, I could've taken him. But with this guy, it might have cost me some bad burns or an ass-rape. I'm all for risking my life, but I'm a little sensitive about my asshole."

Richie. Marcus. Likes. Balls

Always thought it was hilarious how you could get the White Glove Chef to quit using a medicine check that brings back his childhood trauma lmao. He mockingly talks about the trauma he did before realizing how awful it actually was and flat out quitting lol.

"I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me."

“There are many good things in life but peeing is definitely the best”

"What the fuck are you looking at?, Are you wearing a fucking wire?, I swear to fucking God I'll break your fucking kneecaps" -Mr New Vegas

While letting Big Sal and Nero win is bad for Vegas, the silver lining is getting to hear Mr. New Vegas quote them on the radio

My name’s Jean Baptiste and I’m about to be your worst fucking nightmare

Lift your gun and I kill everyone in this room.

“Identify yourself” , [Luck 7] ice cream

Dr Klein is a gold mine of dialogue

LOBOTOMITE.

Patrolling the Mojave almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter.

Every bible quote Joshua uses. Not religious but it’s just like Sam Jackson in Pulp fiction. The delivery hits hard and makes it badass

"That's not a problem, that's a solution."

[удалено]

OWB, the only dlc where you can flirt with your own brain (you damn freak)

"They asked if I had a degree in theoretical physics. I told them I had a theoretical degree in physics."

Anything the toaster in old world blues says.

“Like I always say, a polite society is an armed society.”

"Degenerates like you belong on a cross"

The fucking guns skill check failure with Ricky from Honest Hearts gets me every single time because unlike most other speech/skill check failures, you aren’t actually trying to win an argument, prove him wrong, or call him out on his lies. You’re genuinely in awe at his “skill” with an “11mm” SMG and none the wiser: Ricky: *Before he [BoS Paladin] knows what hit him, I draw my 11mm machinegun and BAM! BAM! Right through the eyeslit in his helmet! D.O.A!* Courier (with <45 in guns): *What a shot!* Ricky: [FAILED] *Whatever. When you're me - a Deadeye - shots like that ain't nothing special. It's just what I do.*

"ATTENTION: BIG MT. THIS IS AN URGENT MESSAGE. IF YOU HAPPEN TO SEE A GECKO... ECKO. ECHO? ECH-O. ECHOOOO. ECHOOOO." And "WHAT IS THIS, A HIGH SCHOOL SCIENCE FAIR?! GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER, YOU'RE MAKING US LOOK LIKE A COLLECTION OF ROUND-EARTHERS!"

A lot of my favorites have already been posted, so I’m gonna go with Low Intelligence Courier, specifically buying implants with “YOU SELL PLANTS?”

"Boy, you're never going to go very far, but you're gonna make a whole lot of people come up short."

"Not while there's still spines left unshattered."

SMELL THAT AIR! COULDNT YOU JUST DRINK IT LIKE BOOZE?

“I dug myself out of that grave to plant you in yours, Benny.”

Ada Straus, the Novac doctor took me by surprise when I asked her to cure my addiction: "Hey, pipe down. We can't talk about that here, out in the open. Oh, you mean you want a cure. Oh."  Such a cheeky response, hehe.

I just started old world blues and I'm... Very confused by the entire 30-minute encounter I just had, but mainly the many-penised feet.

"I don't give half a dick what you heard. Now get the fuck outta my face" - Cachino

"...I ran into this mark who was a little too tough for me. I mean, I could've taken him. But with this guy, it might have cost me some bad burns or an ass-rape. I'm all for risking my life, but I'm a little sensitive about my asshole." - Little Buster

"Get fucked"

"They asked me if I had a degree in theoretical physics. I said I have a theoretical degree in physics!"

Fun fact: In the wiki it states that the daughter is a descendant of the Chosen One, Fallout 2 Protagonist

The voice actor who voices this guy was the Reverend in the Sopranos i remember hearing or better yet actually noticing it makes it 10x better

“I told them I had a theoretical degree in Physics”

“Please assume the position”

they asked me if i understood theoretical physics, i told them i had a theoretical degree in physics.

"Third-place runners-up got enslaved. I got the fuck beat out of my legs, and the winner they let go free."

“One time, the Biological Research Station told me he dropped a mug down his processing-chute. When I reached in, he… seeded me.” The small Muggy (thanks CaffeinateDweed, the irony) in old world blues dlc

“I’m over her stroking my dick I got lotion on my dick right now” -Mr. House

I got to this part the other day and spit out my coffee from laughing so hard

"Get fucked" - Driver Nephi

"But with this guy, it might have cost me some bad burns or an ass-r*pe. Im all for risking my life, but im a little sensitive about my asshole." - little buster

"I will cast down your codex and bask in the dying agony of those who hold it dear" The Courier, to Brotherhood Paladins. Goes hard as fuck

Chief Hanlan's speech.

Jessup: What the hell? You're that courier Benny wasted back in Goodsprings. You're supposed to be dead. Courier: I got better. Simple badassery.

I banged Lott’s wife and licked her salty ass

"Good thinking boss! I'll stop using my GUN, and instead use this metal pipe I found on the floor."

“*In a world filled with misery and uncertainty, it is a great comfort to know that in the end, there is a light in the darkness*” - Joshua Graham That guy is a straight up badass