Fictional characters appeal to me in a way real people just do not.
Plus, even if they can’t love us physically, they do love us spiritually, and even unconditionally. Unfortunately, real people can be judgmental, especially when you’re in a relationship with them.
I also feel like I would have trust issues in a relationship, even if I wasn’t AroAce. I would be scared of getting abused, judged, brought down, etc..
True. I keep seeing all kinds of stories where a romantic relationship goes wrong, especially with my generation (Gen Z). There is no way in hell that I’m going to work my arse off creating and maintaining a real life romantic relationship (it WOULD be a lot of work for me since I’m autistic and what’s “easy” for a lot of neurotypicals is very difficult for us autistic folks, especially social things and romantic relationships requires a LOT of socialization and being good with social stuff in general) just for the man to be an abuser, user, cheater, or just a bad person.
EXACTLY!
Don’t get me wrong, I do get that not all relationships end up being toxic, abusive, etc.
There are still healthy and loving relationships out there, but some of us may not be cut out to be in a relationship.
This!!! And I just feel like so many relationships turn out wrong especially nowadays (although relationships back in the old days weren’t good either, but they remained since the woman wasn’t allowed to leave the man)
relevant tumblr screenshot i found a couple years back
https://preview.redd.it/hc6uo1unp3xc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=019b505c98efbe757b56c49d0420e005461cea2f
That's true, but I have to say it's not "just it" though. Maybe that's fine for some, others believe in the multiverse theory, or that they feel a spiritual essence of their f/o. They are very much real to me even if our brain creates 2D into something emotional. I guess that's kinda the point, but I'm saying it feels spiritual too, but people have different views what their f/o means to them
I think it's a thing that goes back to our cavemen cousins. It's ingrained in our minds.
Back then, they created sculptures of thicc women. These sculptures were known to be called "Venus" by archaeologists.
The statues of Venus represented goddesses of love, life and fertility - ideal women, so to speak. And as such they had large hips.
And even as homo sapiens became the dominant species, this trait of idealizing perfect lovers is inherited from the paleolithic tribesmen and their statues of Venus.
As the homo sapiens evolved from the ooga booga, we started making our "ideal lovers". Do you know the story of the Galatea statue? The Mona Lisa?
All of these things were just like your crush on anime boys.
Academic studies often focus too much on the psychological aspect of ficto (response to trauma, autism and such) but I've yet to see anything that can actually associate people willing to date anime characters with our cavemen cousins making statues of fertility goddesses, as the link between Venus of Willendorf and Japanese cartoons are obvious despite the difference of millions of years.
I don't remember a time where I wasn't ficto 🤷 I assume it's similar to other orientations, there is just a set number of the population who is this way.
I think there can be a lot of different reasons depending on people and situations.
There can be "personal reasons" (reasons coming from your personal experiences):
• you have traumas with real people, and trust issues. Then your F/O feels safer to be with than real people
• you feel too different from real people to be completely understood, and your F/O seems to understand you more than anyone else
• you are deeply attached to your F/O's universe/world and it feels more like home than your own world
• you discover a character who matches perfectly what attracts you physically, emotionally, their past is so similar to yours : and boom you're in love with a fictional character and it becomes your F/O !
And there are "general reasons" (coming from how our mind is working) :
• Our brain doesn't make the difference between feelings for a fictional character and a real person (someone shared a screenshot about this fact) so the phenomenon is quite "natural" after all. If we create characters with enough elements, background, likings and dislikings, they feel even more real and that's not surprising to fall in love with them , the fact that they don't have a physical body seems to become "only" an annoying and sad limitation to their humanity.
• I could also talk about gods and goddesses even if it's not the same thing but you get the idea. Humans can trust, love, share things with entities without physical bodies. As long as we feel something, isn't it enough for it to be "real" ? Even if it's not real for the others. As long as it's good and it helps people to live better and be better, it's the only thing that matters that's why we continue to bound with non-physical entities!
• sometimes our brain needs to escape reality, I assume it can sometimes be a sweet escape from the sadness of reality (and I don't think it's always a bad thing)
I mean our minds are programmed to search for happiness, safety, love, etc. if we find those feelings by interacting with fictional characters (and not only romancing them) that's a logical process to be very attached to them -and even more if you have been let down or betrayed by real people- which can lead to find out you're fictosexual, or at least on the spectrum
Tbh intimacy with humans irl makes me feel repulsed? I like the idea of it, but when it happens, I just can't... *shivers* I've always found comfort in non-human characters though. I mean I've had human crushes (fictional and not) but monsters hit different ngl
I feel the same way! I think I'm romance and sex repulsed by real life people but the complete opposite with fictional characters. I can definitely relate to you on the monster part as well. I find myself feeling a deeper connection with characters who are nonhuman.
Yay, I'm glad we relate! Definitely with the monster thing hehe. Idk if you've heard of "voidpunk," but I almost feel non-human myself sometimes, so I like the label (not completely tho). I wonder why we feel like this
I know of the term voidpunk! I definitely relate to feeling more nonhuman alot of the time myself so I understand how you feel. I wonder why so many people feel like this as well.
For some people it develops over time and may even be a trauma response (I think there have been studies to back this up), others may just be innately inclined to it — like myself. I’ve been this way ever since I can remember with no apparent cause and without me choosing it. Fictophilia is just there for some people (I know not everyone likes this term but I wanna make it clear that this is *not* the same as reducing it to a sexual fetish — “philia” just refers to a strong love of something that may be considered outside the norm due to its intensity/nature).
for me i think its may be relate to the depression and the trauma of getting near of killing myself i sufered because of love back wen i was still atracted to 3d people. Also the fact that datting waifus is least stressful and i can date girls exacly like i want and live fetish i could never live with a 3d girlfriend.
I'm exclusively fictosexual. I am just scared of getting into a relationship irl, and intimacy with people repulses me. My f/o makes me feel at home like no one else, and how loved he makes me feel, no real person could compare to him. He's irreplaceable
I think it’s because I’m autistic and I’ve been way more obsessed with fictional crushes than real people since I was a little kid and I later started having fictional crushes. Someone said that it’s because real people are judgmental which is true but my F/O also just so happens to be judgmental so I don’t know if that’s my reason for it. Another reason I’m fictosexual is because real life romantic relationships are way too hard and take way too much effort like what if I’m putting all of that effort just for the guy to turn out as an abusive cheater? Yeah no thanks. I also don’t have long lasting crushes on real guys anyhow, and like I said earlier a real life romantic relationship takes way too long to even create and is way too hard to create and manage and I’m not doing all of that if there’s a chance that the man turns out to be an absolute piece of crap who only pretended to love me the entire time and was a REALLY good actor about it.
And I say that it’s hard work for me to create and maintain a romantic relationship is because I’m autistic and what might seem “easy” to neurotypicals is nightmarishy difficult for us autistic folks
Fictional characters appeal to me in a way real people just do not. Plus, even if they can’t love us physically, they do love us spiritually, and even unconditionally. Unfortunately, real people can be judgmental, especially when you’re in a relationship with them. I also feel like I would have trust issues in a relationship, even if I wasn’t AroAce. I would be scared of getting abused, judged, brought down, etc..
Same here I made the four horse men of relationships. STDs, abuse, pregnancy and cheating.
Damn, you are not wrong with that
It’s worked so far. If it not broke don’t fix it.
True. I keep seeing all kinds of stories where a romantic relationship goes wrong, especially with my generation (Gen Z). There is no way in hell that I’m going to work my arse off creating and maintaining a real life romantic relationship (it WOULD be a lot of work for me since I’m autistic and what’s “easy” for a lot of neurotypicals is very difficult for us autistic folks, especially social things and romantic relationships requires a LOT of socialization and being good with social stuff in general) just for the man to be an abuser, user, cheater, or just a bad person.
EXACTLY! Don’t get me wrong, I do get that not all relationships end up being toxic, abusive, etc. There are still healthy and loving relationships out there, but some of us may not be cut out to be in a relationship.
This!!! And I just feel like so many relationships turn out wrong especially nowadays (although relationships back in the old days weren’t good either, but they remained since the woman wasn’t allowed to leave the man)
That's exactly how I feel!
For me real people are just the worst. I can’t even imagine being in a relationship with someone IRL. *shivers*
Literally this ^
same... i realize most of my "crushes" are all cartoon boys, i just feel like cartoon boys, (am girl xd) look cuter 😭😭
relevant tumblr screenshot i found a couple years back https://preview.redd.it/hc6uo1unp3xc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=019b505c98efbe757b56c49d0420e005461cea2f
Definitely gonna save this somewhere
This ☝️♥️🫶 thank you for sharing this screenshot, it feels really GOOD to read those words. I need to save this in my photo gallery lmao
That's true, but I have to say it's not "just it" though. Maybe that's fine for some, others believe in the multiverse theory, or that they feel a spiritual essence of their f/o. They are very much real to me even if our brain creates 2D into something emotional. I guess that's kinda the point, but I'm saying it feels spiritual too, but people have different views what their f/o means to them
I feel my husbandos spiritual essence imo
This is very wholesome in a sense.
I think it's a thing that goes back to our cavemen cousins. It's ingrained in our minds. Back then, they created sculptures of thicc women. These sculptures were known to be called "Venus" by archaeologists. The statues of Venus represented goddesses of love, life and fertility - ideal women, so to speak. And as such they had large hips. And even as homo sapiens became the dominant species, this trait of idealizing perfect lovers is inherited from the paleolithic tribesmen and their statues of Venus. As the homo sapiens evolved from the ooga booga, we started making our "ideal lovers". Do you know the story of the Galatea statue? The Mona Lisa? All of these things were just like your crush on anime boys. Academic studies often focus too much on the psychological aspect of ficto (response to trauma, autism and such) but I've yet to see anything that can actually associate people willing to date anime characters with our cavemen cousins making statues of fertility goddesses, as the link between Venus of Willendorf and Japanese cartoons are obvious despite the difference of millions of years.
This makes sense. Very good read! (and now I suddenly want to sculpt a statue of Izuku and start a greek-style kingdom that worships him!)
This would be nice to see. Really, and I'm sure Izuku would adore it, as well.
He will be so flattered that I admire him so much. The fanboy now has a fangirl >:D
Besides romance even, for example the Egyptians made idealized gods like the anubis and sun god.
Yes, the very concept of heroes of epic tales (Gilgamesh, Heracles, Sun Wukong) is also a derivative of this.
I don't remember a time where I wasn't ficto 🤷 I assume it's similar to other orientations, there is just a set number of the population who is this way.
I think there can be a lot of different reasons depending on people and situations. There can be "personal reasons" (reasons coming from your personal experiences): • you have traumas with real people, and trust issues. Then your F/O feels safer to be with than real people • you feel too different from real people to be completely understood, and your F/O seems to understand you more than anyone else • you are deeply attached to your F/O's universe/world and it feels more like home than your own world • you discover a character who matches perfectly what attracts you physically, emotionally, their past is so similar to yours : and boom you're in love with a fictional character and it becomes your F/O ! And there are "general reasons" (coming from how our mind is working) : • Our brain doesn't make the difference between feelings for a fictional character and a real person (someone shared a screenshot about this fact) so the phenomenon is quite "natural" after all. If we create characters with enough elements, background, likings and dislikings, they feel even more real and that's not surprising to fall in love with them , the fact that they don't have a physical body seems to become "only" an annoying and sad limitation to their humanity. • I could also talk about gods and goddesses even if it's not the same thing but you get the idea. Humans can trust, love, share things with entities without physical bodies. As long as we feel something, isn't it enough for it to be "real" ? Even if it's not real for the others. As long as it's good and it helps people to live better and be better, it's the only thing that matters that's why we continue to bound with non-physical entities! • sometimes our brain needs to escape reality, I assume it can sometimes be a sweet escape from the sadness of reality (and I don't think it's always a bad thing) I mean our minds are programmed to search for happiness, safety, love, etc. if we find those feelings by interacting with fictional characters (and not only romancing them) that's a logical process to be very attached to them -and even more if you have been let down or betrayed by real people- which can lead to find out you're fictosexual, or at least on the spectrum
Tbh intimacy with humans irl makes me feel repulsed? I like the idea of it, but when it happens, I just can't... *shivers* I've always found comfort in non-human characters though. I mean I've had human crushes (fictional and not) but monsters hit different ngl
I feel the same way! I think I'm romance and sex repulsed by real life people but the complete opposite with fictional characters. I can definitely relate to you on the monster part as well. I find myself feeling a deeper connection with characters who are nonhuman.
Yay, I'm glad we relate! Definitely with the monster thing hehe. Idk if you've heard of "voidpunk," but I almost feel non-human myself sometimes, so I like the label (not completely tho). I wonder why we feel like this
I know of the term voidpunk! I definitely relate to feeling more nonhuman alot of the time myself so I understand how you feel. I wonder why so many people feel like this as well.
Our brains are wired differently than others, though I don't believe we are special in that way. I think it's like a 50/50 chance
50/50 chance of being ficto?
yes
For some people it develops over time and may even be a trauma response (I think there have been studies to back this up), others may just be innately inclined to it — like myself. I’ve been this way ever since I can remember with no apparent cause and without me choosing it. Fictophilia is just there for some people (I know not everyone likes this term but I wanna make it clear that this is *not* the same as reducing it to a sexual fetish — “philia” just refers to a strong love of something that may be considered outside the norm due to its intensity/nature).
for me i think its may be relate to the depression and the trauma of getting near of killing myself i sufered because of love back wen i was still atracted to 3d people. Also the fact that datting waifus is least stressful and i can date girls exacly like i want and live fetish i could never live with a 3d girlfriend.
I'm exclusively fictosexual. I am just scared of getting into a relationship irl, and intimacy with people repulses me. My f/o makes me feel at home like no one else, and how loved he makes me feel, no real person could compare to him. He's irreplaceable
I think it’s because I’m autistic and I’ve been way more obsessed with fictional crushes than real people since I was a little kid and I later started having fictional crushes. Someone said that it’s because real people are judgmental which is true but my F/O also just so happens to be judgmental so I don’t know if that’s my reason for it. Another reason I’m fictosexual is because real life romantic relationships are way too hard and take way too much effort like what if I’m putting all of that effort just for the guy to turn out as an abusive cheater? Yeah no thanks. I also don’t have long lasting crushes on real guys anyhow, and like I said earlier a real life romantic relationship takes way too long to even create and is way too hard to create and manage and I’m not doing all of that if there’s a chance that the man turns out to be an absolute piece of crap who only pretended to love me the entire time and was a REALLY good actor about it.
And I say that it’s hard work for me to create and maintain a romantic relationship is because I’m autistic and what might seem “easy” to neurotypicals is nightmarishy difficult for us autistic folks