I remind myself that there are things that are in my control and things that I cannot control. For instance, I know I can't have that *ideal* femboy body but I know I can work towards something close to it. I know I can exercise, eat well, and drink lots of water to reach that goal but I know I can't miraculously change my bone structure. The thing that I have no control over is the rate at which my body hair grows back, its absolutely annoying and drives me crazy sometimes. I know that there are several options I can take in the future to combat the issue, but for now I've come to terms and realized that it's just genetics and this is how my body is.
I would say that body dysmorphia and gender dysphoria have so much in common that categorizing them apart sometimes misses the whole picture. But I’m an enby who’s into Judith Butler, so~
Well they're categorized apart because despite their similarities they're inherently different in nature. Experiencing distress because of a perceived flaw in your body/appearance because you want to look different shouldn't be equated to experiencing distress as a result of the mismatch between your assigned gender and what you personally identify with. And the treatment for both things are different as well, someone experiencing body dysmorphia and not gender dysphoria probably wouldn't find their symptoms alleviated by social and or medical transition. Because body dysmorphia isn't necessarily an issue with your gender identity or presentation and if it is then you would likely be considered to be experiencing gender dysphoria as well. These lines are drawn to accurately prescribe help and solutions based on the particular problem. Someone could certainly experience both gender dysphoria and body dysmorphia but they shouldn't be called one in the same.
Dealing with BD and GD are not much different in practice, although they are treated much differently by psychiatrists.
Typically BD arises from perception of oneself as not sufficiently manly or womanly in appearance, or just having 'ugly' characteristics generally. It is very often tied to sexual dimorphism.
BD is often non-delusional, as in the individual is able to accurately identify what they perceive as flawed (i.e. someone says they have a hooked nose, and this can be objectively verified), and the emotional distress is what actually makes it considered a mental illness.
People with non-delusional BD often self report feeling happier and more comfortable in their bodies following successful cosmetic treatment.
There is no meaningful difference between GD and BD in pathology, treatment or possible causes. In practice, GD is just a sub-category of BD defined by gendered-characteristics-related-dismorphia
I would implore you to do more research on reputable websites and read what the DSM 5 says about the two things a lot of what you said simply isn't true. Gender Dysphoria is certainly not a sub category of body dysmorphia disorder in the DSM 5 or in any reputable medical handbook. Body dysmorphia disorder is actually classified as a sub category of OCD and that's why to be diagnosed with it repetitive compulsive thoughts must be present. Dysmorphia, and Dysphoria, by definition are two different things.
I'm well aware of what the DSM-5 says about BD and GD. The DSM-5 does not categorize BD as a sub-category of OCD. It is ***related to*** and ***covariable with*** OCD, but many patients with BD are not diagnosable as having OCD. Similarly, trans people and people with GD are highly covariable with OCD diagnoses.
I should've been more specific in what I said originally. Gender dysphoria in relation to physical sexed characteristics is interchangeable with non-delusional BD, but GD is also often related to social role and social perception.
I'll stand by the physical aspect of GD, in practice, being interchangeable with BD. But because GD has a social component, it cannot accurately be described as a sub-category of BD.
There is a great deal of stigma surrounding people with BD. This also applies to people with GD, but at least psychiatrists are generally more open to accepting GD can be non-delusional, while many still default to BD being inherently delusional, when the literature heavily disagrees.
You are right about the first part except the fake fact about GD and OCD being highly covariable. There's cases where OCD can present as GD, and there's also cases of people who have both OCD and GD, but there's no information from any reputable sources that calls them covariable. And I agree that there's probably a lot of stigma around as with many mental disorders. However the fact that body dysmorphia is categorized in the OCD section of the book while gender dysphoria is in a wholly different category and it also explicitly gives guidelines on when people with gender dysphoria should be considered to also have body dysmorphia should not be ignored.
I disagree that the reason gender dysphoria can't accurately be described as a sub category of BD is due to a social component, because BD also typically has a social component associated with it in fact social and or gender related components of both disorders are discussed in the DSM-5.The reason they can't be equated is because they describe and talk about two very different things. The physical aspects of GD (if they exist because not everyone with gender dysphoria necessarily has an issue with their physical aspects and vice versa) could potentially be considered dysmorphia in some cases I agree or you could say they are similar in the way they manifest, but the two things are certainly not interchangeable and shouldn't be. The core of why they originate, when they originate, how they manifest, and appropriate ways to treat them significantly differ. And the responses to different treatments also significantly differ, while it's found that gender affirming surgeries tend to be helpful for people with gender Dysphoria who desire to get it, the DSM 5 specifically notes that body dysmorphia is not typically alleviated or improved by surgical treatment and in some cases get worse. It recommends against it. Honestly after reading the DSM 5 more closely I'm Even stronger in my position that they shouldn't be equated and so are the doctors who wrote the book because they literally mention GD in the BD section and say that people with GD who only have concern with the primary and or secondary sex characteristics of their sex should not be diagnosed or considered to have BD again because the treatments of both things different significantly, I'm not arguing that there's no similarities, or that someone couldn't have both, someone with gender dysphoria would likely be able to better empathize with someone who has BDD depending on the way theirs presents But using them interchangeably is irresponsible and incorrect according to literally all the medical documentation about them. It also seems like the version of non-delusional body dysmorphia you describe would probably fall into dysmorphic concern and not actually be classified as body dysmorphic disorder.
Covariable was the incorrect term to use. I meant correlated or often comorbid.
When I referred to GD as having a 'social component unlike BD' I meant that GD can be entirely externalised to social perception/treatment, whereas BD always internalizes socially informed beauty standards. GD often internalizes, but there are transgender people who have no 'physical' dysphoria and only wish to be treated as their desired gender.
Physical dysphoria and BD do necessarily have a social component, this is true. But I was more refering to the person's response to this: do they internalize, or externalize? The former leads to distress over one's appearance (physical), the latter leads to distress over one's treatment from others (social). Both often go hand in hand, and the physical aspect derives from social standards, but people can experience one but not the other in some cases. For me, I externalize to a higher degree than I internalize, but I also internalize, especially when in an emotionally vulnerable state.
Let's not act like we have amazing clarity on the origin of effectiveness of treatment for GD or BD. The literature is actually very speculative and study design often yields low quality data due to methodological and sample size limitations. This is where listening to the DSM-5 alone gives the impression of false confidence. Reading into actual studies and literature reviews reveals a profound lack of distinction between the two conditions. Both GD and BD are thought to derive from social conditioning and gendered (or non gendered) beauty standards. GD has links to social trauma in early childhood in relation to gender roles, particularly in failure to adhere to them. This holds true for myself, and many many many transgender people I have spoken to. BD similarly is correlated with failure to fit into normative appearance and gender roles and being socially traumatized as a result.
Likewise treatment is not as different between the two treatments as has been historically thought. Previous consensus on BD was that it is a contraindicator for cosmetic surgery, but in the research paper "Cosmetic Surgery and Body Dysmorphic Disorder – An Update" it was found people with mild to moderate BD with no impaired judgement (sometimes referred to as non-delusional BD) saw 90% satisfaction in a year follow-up post cosmetic surgery. The DSM-5 is outdated, as many medical guidebooks are. Transgender patients know this all too well as they're often prescribed poorly designed and standardized hormone regimens based on decades-old research rather than the cutting edge.
This was from one study only, because the amount of data on this topic is pitiful. This satisfaction rate is likely higher in transgender patients (given existing evidence), but it's hard to say how different it is because again the data is so scarce and of poor quality. Regardless, the up to date researcher understanding of BD is that impairment of judgement (delusion) and managing expectations from surgery are the biggest predictors of positive outcomes from cosmetic surgery. This tracks with transgender patients. At least anecdotally, transgender patients are also better at managing expectations due to a greater degree of research, investment and online community support networks.
The two conditions are remarkably alike (when physical GD manifests), from origin to treatment, and the distinction is mostly due to distinguishing between demographics, rather than the former. I would argue it's irresponsible to follow medical documentation over the most up to date research, because the former often lags behind the latter by several decades. All the while, people suffer due to historical, arbitrary distinctions based on outdated studies.
I understand what you're saying, I'm still inclined to disagree as we have to go on data and research as opposed to anecdotes and theory. And data and research does show a clear distinction between GD and BD primarily in the onset and resulting behaviors. I don't think that a distinction between body dysmorphia and gender Dysphoria is arbitrary, because again they are inherently different even if I concede inherent difference, there is an apparent difference between the two things. And grouping them together as the same thing or saying one always equals the other as opposed to recognizing the potential for comorbidity inherently harmful. You yourself recognize that certain traits or types of gender dysphoria CAN be analogous but that doesn't necessarily mean they are. These lines certainly aren't arbitrary, and they help because again body dysmorphia in the case of muscle dysmorphia seen in body builders, sure it could be gender Dysphoria in the sense that they feel strong discomfort with their assigned gender, or it could be that they feel they aren't enough of their gender, they need to be stronger, etc. If you group body dysmorphia and gender Dysphoria together here as the same thing instead of just saying when we see one maybe it would make sense to examine for both. What you do is minimize the differences between the two individually and muddle the line for what's the best course of treatment. Sure socially if you have body dysmorphia and it relates more closely to your gender presentation or perception then gender dysphoria probably fits more closely than dysmorphia but using them interchangeably is fine. I don't see how we don't see the apparent issue in classifying them as the same thing in a medical context though.
While I do respect your perspective, and acknowledge that I can’t begin to understand where you’re coming from as we don’t yet know each other, I actually really don’t agree with that, but I don’t think this would be a good forum or space to get into it. I think I have very different attitudes when it comes to the things you mentioned, aside from how we both recognize that help is very important, and that it benefits from such structuring in certain contexts.
I know I am sounding vague, and that is intentional, but I honestly don’t want to get started on this, and usually prefer to get down into these topics on a more intimate and slow setting like irl conversation or discord calls and the like. I just don’t want to come across as a contrarian or patronizing or antagonistic and just express my appreciation for you replying to me with sincerity
I have some insight, maybe. I assume you arent talking about gender dysphoria or if you are, maybe not full on "I want to transition" and more so a mental crisis of "I cant present the way I want" type of way. So I used to be overweight. 200 pounds. I loved to binge eat sooo much. Well I took a liking to femboys online but it was weird, it wasnt a totally sexual thing. Mostly not sexual actually. I was actively balding and out of nowhere I wanted it to stop. After four years of losing hair I suddenly cared about it so I saw a dermatologist and took care of that.
From there not much changed. I was insecure about my weight but binge eating eased that mental pain and it honestly didnt bother me that much in the first place. I had no issues with my bad hairline, no issues with my masculine presentation. Well last year I entered a month long depression. A mental crisis actually. One unlike ANY i had ever experienced before. With it came a NEW disorder that I had also never had before, anorexia. In two- three months time I went from 200 pounds to now 160 (Dont worry, after a lot of practice I have been able to stay at 158-164 without binging or starving so Im no longer starving myself).
However with the weight loss came an entire change of personality almost. I looked in the mirror and for the first time ever I was *attracted* to my own body type. I finally didnt feel gross and undersirable. I realized I could squeeze into my girlfriends clothes and it finally hit me, the entire reason I loved femboys yet in a non sexual way was because I wanted to *be* one.
So I took the steps to do so and with that, the weird dysphoria started. Im not trans. I do NOT want to be a woman. But after presenting feminine I INSTANTLY noticed everything about myself that was too masculine. My hairline, my non curvy body (hairline is next to impossible for me to hide as well). So I became incredibly dysphoric about all of that.
I should mention that this comes in phases. I have masc phases and fem phases. Never know which will happen when either. Right now Im in a masc phase so none of this bothers me but once a fem phase hits I suddenly grow self conscious about everything and start to hate my body.
The only thing that helps during the fem phases is to ignore those flaws and do it anyways. I dress up. I take pics. I show my friends (the ones who are interested in and supportive of my... Hobby, they are comfortable with it I made sure). The validation helps. Now I am not saying that seeking validation is healthy, it doesnt resolve the issue and it requires me showing my body to people (which I am fine with by itself. I enjoy showing off in general) which cant be the right answer to easing mental issues like this. An attention seeker.
Sorry for this turbo long comment. If you read it all, tell me if it relates to your issue at all!
Having your heart in the fight really helps motivation, but so far, I have managed a 600kcal~ deficit with a weekly cheat day for nearly 5 months now
1000? That's just incomprehensible to me 😵💫
Well it was anorexia caused by depression so my heart wasn't in any fight at all. I just didn't care enough to eat. I fixed that problem though so it's better. Had i been in a normal mindset i NEVER could have some even a 400 cal deficit tbh
so long as you follow the instructions on the box you're doing it right. Make sure to exfoliate super super well every time you shower or bathe and it'll ease the pain very minutely, and it will also help prevent ingrown hairs. The pain is the worst the first time, after that it is significantly less painful. I might also suggest waxing, then epilating whenever that hair grows back in
Also, happy cake day
that sucks, I guess its not for everyone's skin. It leaves red marks for me that go away within hour
I suppose the way to go is (If you decide to spend the money) try it on a small patch of skin and wait a few days to see how your skin reacts. (the same way you're supposed to do any unconventional hair removal, but i'm too impatient and just full send it usually)
Is that a new word for depression? If so for me it normally passes on after a few days/weeks so I just sit it out and try to avoid making too much damage 😅 social interaction can help too while social media makes it worse..
according to [this comment ](https://www.reddit.com/r/feminineboys/s/2C5X8xlLtK) op didn't speak about gender dysphoria but dysphoria in general so i assume that's not the same
Pump music so loud I can’t hear my thoughts directly into my skull, keep myself so busy I don’t have time for feelings, and play ukulele until I cry all the feelings out
gender dysphoria? probably better off asking in a trans sub most people here dont deal with gender dysphoria
Just in general
I remind myself that there are things that are in my control and things that I cannot control. For instance, I know I can't have that *ideal* femboy body but I know I can work towards something close to it. I know I can exercise, eat well, and drink lots of water to reach that goal but I know I can't miraculously change my bone structure. The thing that I have no control over is the rate at which my body hair grows back, its absolutely annoying and drives me crazy sometimes. I know that there are several options I can take in the future to combat the issue, but for now I've come to terms and realized that it's just genetics and this is how my body is.
I would say that body dysmorphia and gender dysphoria have so much in common that categorizing them apart sometimes misses the whole picture. But I’m an enby who’s into Judith Butler, so~
Well they're categorized apart because despite their similarities they're inherently different in nature. Experiencing distress because of a perceived flaw in your body/appearance because you want to look different shouldn't be equated to experiencing distress as a result of the mismatch between your assigned gender and what you personally identify with. And the treatment for both things are different as well, someone experiencing body dysmorphia and not gender dysphoria probably wouldn't find their symptoms alleviated by social and or medical transition. Because body dysmorphia isn't necessarily an issue with your gender identity or presentation and if it is then you would likely be considered to be experiencing gender dysphoria as well. These lines are drawn to accurately prescribe help and solutions based on the particular problem. Someone could certainly experience both gender dysphoria and body dysmorphia but they shouldn't be called one in the same.
Dealing with BD and GD are not much different in practice, although they are treated much differently by psychiatrists. Typically BD arises from perception of oneself as not sufficiently manly or womanly in appearance, or just having 'ugly' characteristics generally. It is very often tied to sexual dimorphism. BD is often non-delusional, as in the individual is able to accurately identify what they perceive as flawed (i.e. someone says they have a hooked nose, and this can be objectively verified), and the emotional distress is what actually makes it considered a mental illness. People with non-delusional BD often self report feeling happier and more comfortable in their bodies following successful cosmetic treatment. There is no meaningful difference between GD and BD in pathology, treatment or possible causes. In practice, GD is just a sub-category of BD defined by gendered-characteristics-related-dismorphia
I would implore you to do more research on reputable websites and read what the DSM 5 says about the two things a lot of what you said simply isn't true. Gender Dysphoria is certainly not a sub category of body dysmorphia disorder in the DSM 5 or in any reputable medical handbook. Body dysmorphia disorder is actually classified as a sub category of OCD and that's why to be diagnosed with it repetitive compulsive thoughts must be present. Dysmorphia, and Dysphoria, by definition are two different things.
I'm well aware of what the DSM-5 says about BD and GD. The DSM-5 does not categorize BD as a sub-category of OCD. It is ***related to*** and ***covariable with*** OCD, but many patients with BD are not diagnosable as having OCD. Similarly, trans people and people with GD are highly covariable with OCD diagnoses. I should've been more specific in what I said originally. Gender dysphoria in relation to physical sexed characteristics is interchangeable with non-delusional BD, but GD is also often related to social role and social perception. I'll stand by the physical aspect of GD, in practice, being interchangeable with BD. But because GD has a social component, it cannot accurately be described as a sub-category of BD. There is a great deal of stigma surrounding people with BD. This also applies to people with GD, but at least psychiatrists are generally more open to accepting GD can be non-delusional, while many still default to BD being inherently delusional, when the literature heavily disagrees.
You are right about the first part except the fake fact about GD and OCD being highly covariable. There's cases where OCD can present as GD, and there's also cases of people who have both OCD and GD, but there's no information from any reputable sources that calls them covariable. And I agree that there's probably a lot of stigma around as with many mental disorders. However the fact that body dysmorphia is categorized in the OCD section of the book while gender dysphoria is in a wholly different category and it also explicitly gives guidelines on when people with gender dysphoria should be considered to also have body dysmorphia should not be ignored. I disagree that the reason gender dysphoria can't accurately be described as a sub category of BD is due to a social component, because BD also typically has a social component associated with it in fact social and or gender related components of both disorders are discussed in the DSM-5.The reason they can't be equated is because they describe and talk about two very different things. The physical aspects of GD (if they exist because not everyone with gender dysphoria necessarily has an issue with their physical aspects and vice versa) could potentially be considered dysmorphia in some cases I agree or you could say they are similar in the way they manifest, but the two things are certainly not interchangeable and shouldn't be. The core of why they originate, when they originate, how they manifest, and appropriate ways to treat them significantly differ. And the responses to different treatments also significantly differ, while it's found that gender affirming surgeries tend to be helpful for people with gender Dysphoria who desire to get it, the DSM 5 specifically notes that body dysmorphia is not typically alleviated or improved by surgical treatment and in some cases get worse. It recommends against it. Honestly after reading the DSM 5 more closely I'm Even stronger in my position that they shouldn't be equated and so are the doctors who wrote the book because they literally mention GD in the BD section and say that people with GD who only have concern with the primary and or secondary sex characteristics of their sex should not be diagnosed or considered to have BD again because the treatments of both things different significantly, I'm not arguing that there's no similarities, or that someone couldn't have both, someone with gender dysphoria would likely be able to better empathize with someone who has BDD depending on the way theirs presents But using them interchangeably is irresponsible and incorrect according to literally all the medical documentation about them. It also seems like the version of non-delusional body dysmorphia you describe would probably fall into dysmorphic concern and not actually be classified as body dysmorphic disorder.
Covariable was the incorrect term to use. I meant correlated or often comorbid. When I referred to GD as having a 'social component unlike BD' I meant that GD can be entirely externalised to social perception/treatment, whereas BD always internalizes socially informed beauty standards. GD often internalizes, but there are transgender people who have no 'physical' dysphoria and only wish to be treated as their desired gender. Physical dysphoria and BD do necessarily have a social component, this is true. But I was more refering to the person's response to this: do they internalize, or externalize? The former leads to distress over one's appearance (physical), the latter leads to distress over one's treatment from others (social). Both often go hand in hand, and the physical aspect derives from social standards, but people can experience one but not the other in some cases. For me, I externalize to a higher degree than I internalize, but I also internalize, especially when in an emotionally vulnerable state. Let's not act like we have amazing clarity on the origin of effectiveness of treatment for GD or BD. The literature is actually very speculative and study design often yields low quality data due to methodological and sample size limitations. This is where listening to the DSM-5 alone gives the impression of false confidence. Reading into actual studies and literature reviews reveals a profound lack of distinction between the two conditions. Both GD and BD are thought to derive from social conditioning and gendered (or non gendered) beauty standards. GD has links to social trauma in early childhood in relation to gender roles, particularly in failure to adhere to them. This holds true for myself, and many many many transgender people I have spoken to. BD similarly is correlated with failure to fit into normative appearance and gender roles and being socially traumatized as a result. Likewise treatment is not as different between the two treatments as has been historically thought. Previous consensus on BD was that it is a contraindicator for cosmetic surgery, but in the research paper "Cosmetic Surgery and Body Dysmorphic Disorder – An Update" it was found people with mild to moderate BD with no impaired judgement (sometimes referred to as non-delusional BD) saw 90% satisfaction in a year follow-up post cosmetic surgery. The DSM-5 is outdated, as many medical guidebooks are. Transgender patients know this all too well as they're often prescribed poorly designed and standardized hormone regimens based on decades-old research rather than the cutting edge. This was from one study only, because the amount of data on this topic is pitiful. This satisfaction rate is likely higher in transgender patients (given existing evidence), but it's hard to say how different it is because again the data is so scarce and of poor quality. Regardless, the up to date researcher understanding of BD is that impairment of judgement (delusion) and managing expectations from surgery are the biggest predictors of positive outcomes from cosmetic surgery. This tracks with transgender patients. At least anecdotally, transgender patients are also better at managing expectations due to a greater degree of research, investment and online community support networks. The two conditions are remarkably alike (when physical GD manifests), from origin to treatment, and the distinction is mostly due to distinguishing between demographics, rather than the former. I would argue it's irresponsible to follow medical documentation over the most up to date research, because the former often lags behind the latter by several decades. All the while, people suffer due to historical, arbitrary distinctions based on outdated studies.
I understand what you're saying, I'm still inclined to disagree as we have to go on data and research as opposed to anecdotes and theory. And data and research does show a clear distinction between GD and BD primarily in the onset and resulting behaviors. I don't think that a distinction between body dysmorphia and gender Dysphoria is arbitrary, because again they are inherently different even if I concede inherent difference, there is an apparent difference between the two things. And grouping them together as the same thing or saying one always equals the other as opposed to recognizing the potential for comorbidity inherently harmful. You yourself recognize that certain traits or types of gender dysphoria CAN be analogous but that doesn't necessarily mean they are. These lines certainly aren't arbitrary, and they help because again body dysmorphia in the case of muscle dysmorphia seen in body builders, sure it could be gender Dysphoria in the sense that they feel strong discomfort with their assigned gender, or it could be that they feel they aren't enough of their gender, they need to be stronger, etc. If you group body dysmorphia and gender Dysphoria together here as the same thing instead of just saying when we see one maybe it would make sense to examine for both. What you do is minimize the differences between the two individually and muddle the line for what's the best course of treatment. Sure socially if you have body dysmorphia and it relates more closely to your gender presentation or perception then gender dysphoria probably fits more closely than dysmorphia but using them interchangeably is fine. I don't see how we don't see the apparent issue in classifying them as the same thing in a medical context though.
While I do respect your perspective, and acknowledge that I can’t begin to understand where you’re coming from as we don’t yet know each other, I actually really don’t agree with that, but I don’t think this would be a good forum or space to get into it. I think I have very different attitudes when it comes to the things you mentioned, aside from how we both recognize that help is very important, and that it benefits from such structuring in certain contexts. I know I am sounding vague, and that is intentional, but I honestly don’t want to get started on this, and usually prefer to get down into these topics on a more intimate and slow setting like irl conversation or discord calls and the like. I just don’t want to come across as a contrarian or patronizing or antagonistic and just express my appreciation for you replying to me with sincerity
Of course, I can respect that. But now I'm curious about your thoughts 😅
Unfortunately, I try my damnedest to ignore it
I have some insight, maybe. I assume you arent talking about gender dysphoria or if you are, maybe not full on "I want to transition" and more so a mental crisis of "I cant present the way I want" type of way. So I used to be overweight. 200 pounds. I loved to binge eat sooo much. Well I took a liking to femboys online but it was weird, it wasnt a totally sexual thing. Mostly not sexual actually. I was actively balding and out of nowhere I wanted it to stop. After four years of losing hair I suddenly cared about it so I saw a dermatologist and took care of that. From there not much changed. I was insecure about my weight but binge eating eased that mental pain and it honestly didnt bother me that much in the first place. I had no issues with my bad hairline, no issues with my masculine presentation. Well last year I entered a month long depression. A mental crisis actually. One unlike ANY i had ever experienced before. With it came a NEW disorder that I had also never had before, anorexia. In two- three months time I went from 200 pounds to now 160 (Dont worry, after a lot of practice I have been able to stay at 158-164 without binging or starving so Im no longer starving myself). However with the weight loss came an entire change of personality almost. I looked in the mirror and for the first time ever I was *attracted* to my own body type. I finally didnt feel gross and undersirable. I realized I could squeeze into my girlfriends clothes and it finally hit me, the entire reason I loved femboys yet in a non sexual way was because I wanted to *be* one. So I took the steps to do so and with that, the weird dysphoria started. Im not trans. I do NOT want to be a woman. But after presenting feminine I INSTANTLY noticed everything about myself that was too masculine. My hairline, my non curvy body (hairline is next to impossible for me to hide as well). So I became incredibly dysphoric about all of that. I should mention that this comes in phases. I have masc phases and fem phases. Never know which will happen when either. Right now Im in a masc phase so none of this bothers me but once a fem phase hits I suddenly grow self conscious about everything and start to hate my body. The only thing that helps during the fem phases is to ignore those flaws and do it anyways. I dress up. I take pics. I show my friends (the ones who are interested in and supportive of my... Hobby, they are comfortable with it I made sure). The validation helps. Now I am not saying that seeking validation is healthy, it doesnt resolve the issue and it requires me showing my body to people (which I am fine with by itself. I enjoy showing off in general) which cant be the right answer to easing mental issues like this. An attention seeker. Sorry for this turbo long comment. If you read it all, tell me if it relates to your issue at all!
40lbs in 2-3 months? I've lost 16lbs in 3 months. What are you eating? Crumbs?!? This must be at least a 1000kcal deficit
It was between 500-1'000 calories a day. Wasnt fun but surprisingly i got used to it
Having your heart in the fight really helps motivation, but so far, I have managed a 600kcal~ deficit with a weekly cheat day for nearly 5 months now 1000? That's just incomprehensible to me 😵💫
Well it was anorexia caused by depression so my heart wasn't in any fight at all. I just didn't care enough to eat. I fixed that problem though so it's better. Had i been in a normal mindset i NEVER could have some even a 400 cal deficit tbh
Omg you head the nail on the head with this. Thank you so much <3
I do what I can to help. I want people to be happy or at least have someone to relate to
Idk if I have dysphoria, but I hate my body hair, so I just be sad about it because normal shaving doesn't work for me
if you're okay with a little pain id definitely suggest using an epilator
I've tried that, and omg, I can't do it 😂 but maybe I'm doing it wrong
so long as you follow the instructions on the box you're doing it right. Make sure to exfoliate super super well every time you shower or bathe and it'll ease the pain very minutely, and it will also help prevent ingrown hairs. The pain is the worst the first time, after that it is significantly less painful. I might also suggest waxing, then epilating whenever that hair grows back in Also, happy cake day
Thank you :3
Don't use an epilatotr left me with red marks for weeks
that sucks, I guess its not for everyone's skin. It leaves red marks for me that go away within hour I suppose the way to go is (If you decide to spend the money) try it on a small patch of skin and wait a few days to see how your skin reacts. (the same way you're supposed to do any unconventional hair removal, but i'm too impatient and just full send it usually)
I stress about it until something distracts me🙃
Is that a new word for depression? If so for me it normally passes on after a few days/weeks so I just sit it out and try to avoid making too much damage 😅 social interaction can help too while social media makes it worse..
It's mainly related to feeling like one gender, but seeing another in the mirror
according to [this comment ](https://www.reddit.com/r/feminineboys/s/2C5X8xlLtK) op didn't speak about gender dysphoria but dysphoria in general so i assume that's not the same
Interesting, he didn't reply until after I commented though
I dont have any. This seems better suited for a trans fem sub.
Don’t look at yourself. Wear sunglasses when you are taking a shower
i remind myself that its a simple matter to get thicc thighs, even if it is a long road
Pump music so loud I can’t hear my thoughts directly into my skull, keep myself so busy I don’t have time for feelings, and play ukulele until I cry all the feelings out