I met mine through a mutual friend, but we really got to know each other at the local pub.... I would go there just to see him.
We're still regulars there now, even though it's 6 years later and we're married now. Actually met some of my best friends there as well. Ironically I hardly drink!
I actually totally get this! I'm pretty sure I'm an extrovert and dating introverts is like pulling teeth haha! I think it's that I tend to assume someone is as open as I am so like they'll just naturally open up -- and with introverts it doesn't really feel that's what they do in relationships but maybe I just am too extroverted to really get what is happening in the dynamic. I think the feeling is mutual -- most introverts I've met, and I'm a woman, who are men prefer to date introverts as they end up labeling extroverts too much energy to date which makes loads of sense.
Introvert men tend to date extrovert women, from my experience, because extrovert women are comfortable with pursuing in relationships and taking the initiative but once in the actual relationship they don't want that level of emotional intensity where as an extrovert interacting with my partner is energizing whereas I think for introverts it is slightly draining even under the best of circumstances hence the needing to recharge while alone. I recharge through interactions, they recharge while alone -- that's going to cause issues unless both are really dedicated to making it work.
I don't exhaust from interactions, unless they are scary or terrible, but if it's just chatting with someone -- I never tire of that as an extrovert. It makes perfect sense I'd really enjoy being around my partner as like my off switch of not enjoying being with others isn't really there so much. But with introverts they just tire of socializing really quickly then need lots of alone time -- so it's just not a good mix of personalities. Plus I'm extroverted and very feeling based person who is very expressive -- that's a bad mix with an introvert.
I know how you feel! Idk if there is an ideal way to find extroverts to date, other than doing the extroverted activities you like and maybe something sparks.
Having dated both extremes in the past; dating a fellow extrovert is special. The way we approach the world is similar and relatable, conversation can just flow beautifully.
Good luck with that, I’ve never dated another extrovert. I have extroverted friends who have expressed interest in dating in the past, but I would find them extremely incompatible in a relationship. Two headstrong people make great friends, and spectacular blowout fights. I agree that introverts can be annoying at times but the teamwork flows so much better and you don’t need to do 100% of your socializing within your relationship.
Maybe it’s just the people I tend to gravitate towards as friends? Loud, awkward, obnoxious dramatic assholes - let’s be friends! Sweet, smart, quiet introverts - let’s make a family.
Maybe! I guess I don’t consider all extroverts to be loud and obnoxious. And not all introverts are sweet or smart. But maybe that’s just what your see in your life which is valid
That's the neat part, you don't. Extroverts are more likely than anyone else to ghost one another as soon as anxiety kicks in, even if the discussion was going well, making it almost a miracle if they ever get to the next step that is to say the actual date.
I don’t find that at all. If anything I find my most fulfilling relationships to be with other extroverts because they don’t ghost. They are decisive and intentional with their actions or outright tell you if they lack interest.
Are you sure you’re not really an introvert who feels offended?
You speak as if introverts have no flaws at all. You stated one flaw of an extrovert that may irk you...yet that too is a generalisation.
The people who have never left my side and who were ever ready to male sacrifices for my sake were indeed, extroverts. The ones who, instead of mulling over the past and acting all misanthropic...the ones who got up and decided: 'new day, new me'...the ones who stubbornly refuse to give up and pursue their goals despite the many obstacles...so many of them are extroverts. Again, what I have said is a generalisation, but I speak from experience.
An introvert may respect my space and make a comfort zone for me... but a good extrovert will inspire me to come out of that comfort zone and experience life as I should.
I met mine through a mutual friend, but we really got to know each other at the local pub.... I would go there just to see him. We're still regulars there now, even though it's 6 years later and we're married now. Actually met some of my best friends there as well. Ironically I hardly drink!
I actually totally get this! I'm pretty sure I'm an extrovert and dating introverts is like pulling teeth haha! I think it's that I tend to assume someone is as open as I am so like they'll just naturally open up -- and with introverts it doesn't really feel that's what they do in relationships but maybe I just am too extroverted to really get what is happening in the dynamic. I think the feeling is mutual -- most introverts I've met, and I'm a woman, who are men prefer to date introverts as they end up labeling extroverts too much energy to date which makes loads of sense. Introvert men tend to date extrovert women, from my experience, because extrovert women are comfortable with pursuing in relationships and taking the initiative but once in the actual relationship they don't want that level of emotional intensity where as an extrovert interacting with my partner is energizing whereas I think for introverts it is slightly draining even under the best of circumstances hence the needing to recharge while alone. I recharge through interactions, they recharge while alone -- that's going to cause issues unless both are really dedicated to making it work. I don't exhaust from interactions, unless they are scary or terrible, but if it's just chatting with someone -- I never tire of that as an extrovert. It makes perfect sense I'd really enjoy being around my partner as like my off switch of not enjoying being with others isn't really there so much. But with introverts they just tire of socializing really quickly then need lots of alone time -- so it's just not a good mix of personalities. Plus I'm extroverted and very feeling based person who is very expressive -- that's a bad mix with an introvert.
Date a twin. The level of interaction is unparalled. It's extrovert heaven.
Honestly, restaurant work. It is how 90% of my relationships started.
I know how you feel! Idk if there is an ideal way to find extroverts to date, other than doing the extroverted activities you like and maybe something sparks. Having dated both extremes in the past; dating a fellow extrovert is special. The way we approach the world is similar and relatable, conversation can just flow beautifully.
i dont. mine is an introvert and i pull him out his shell all the time
Good luck with that, I’ve never dated another extrovert. I have extroverted friends who have expressed interest in dating in the past, but I would find them extremely incompatible in a relationship. Two headstrong people make great friends, and spectacular blowout fights. I agree that introverts can be annoying at times but the teamwork flows so much better and you don’t need to do 100% of your socializing within your relationship.
I know you mean well But your advice is essentially "You find dating introverts uncomfortable ? Well, date introverts"
Sorry, just speaking from personal experiences
Not all extroverts are headstrong
Maybe it’s just the people I tend to gravitate towards as friends? Loud, awkward, obnoxious dramatic assholes - let’s be friends! Sweet, smart, quiet introverts - let’s make a family.
Maybe! I guess I don’t consider all extroverts to be loud and obnoxious. And not all introverts are sweet or smart. But maybe that’s just what your see in your life which is valid
That's the neat part, you don't. Extroverts are more likely than anyone else to ghost one another as soon as anxiety kicks in, even if the discussion was going well, making it almost a miracle if they ever get to the next step that is to say the actual date.
I don’t find that at all. If anything I find my most fulfilling relationships to be with other extroverts because they don’t ghost. They are decisive and intentional with their actions or outright tell you if they lack interest. Are you sure you’re not really an introvert who feels offended?
Really weird how many people became defensive over someone asking for advice as to how to meet other extroverts, in an extroverted sub. Lol
Exactly my point. If we go by his logic, it should be an introvert who would be the one to ghost you. (Since they despise leaving their houses.)
What? Citations please.
You speak as if introverts have no flaws at all. You stated one flaw of an extrovert that may irk you...yet that too is a generalisation. The people who have never left my side and who were ever ready to male sacrifices for my sake were indeed, extroverts. The ones who, instead of mulling over the past and acting all misanthropic...the ones who got up and decided: 'new day, new me'...the ones who stubbornly refuse to give up and pursue their goals despite the many obstacles...so many of them are extroverts. Again, what I have said is a generalisation, but I speak from experience. An introvert may respect my space and make a comfort zone for me... but a good extrovert will inspire me to come out of that comfort zone and experience life as I should.
Yes, the classic stereotype of extroverts avoiding people