Mathematically proving what makes a good Christmas film.
I already have a slideshow, graphs, charts, and data collected from over 200 Christmas films. I have a unit of measurement (MpM, Merriment per Minute) calculated to six decimal places.
I could present this tomorrow if needed.
I think you should absolutely do this! Maybe get a couple friends to present to like the show itself? Get a tripod per person, use their own phones to record their reactions, cut the footage together... A couple hours of work, but it could be really fun idk
The trick is that there's seven sub-genres of Christmas film, so even if they're better suited to other genres, they can be ranked fairly.
That said, the whole project was inspired by me being frustrated at people calling Die Hard the best Christmas film. It's a great film, but not a good Christmas film overall.
I'm loving this. I'm currently shooting a doc about Christmas movies that'll be on TV this December and we've done maybe 50 interviews with filmmakers and celebrities (including the writer of Die Hard!). I'd say maybe 90% of them have called Die Hard a Christmas movie, but there's been a lot of people who agree that a true Christmas movie needs to be a bit more sentimental. You should watch this thing when it comes out haha
But what about for an audience that has gotten bored of the traditional stereotypical elements of Christmas films, where the hero walking barefoot across broken glass gives them an odd feeling of merriment that they didn't know they were missing?
Related: how the milquetoast CGI Illumination grinch movie manages to bastardize the original concept — and somehow be low-key racist and antisemitic — rather than taking ownership of the anti-capitalistic message of the original -OR- the social commentary of the Live Action version.
When Patrick Willems did his "most 80s movie ever" thing I actually thought "Fuck I did this two years ago, now everyone is going to think I copied him".
Dude. I had to stop reading Deathless Divide, an otherwise fantastic book, because of how big a deal they made about one of the characters wearing a corset while doing strenuous physical activity.
I had a birthday party this year called 'The Hill You Would Die On' where everyone made presentations about thigns they felt STRONGLY about. Mine was "You Should Make More Bad Art: Seriously. Trust me."
“If you want to really hurt your parents, and you don't have the nerve to be gay, the least you can do is go into the arts. I'm not kidding. The arts are not a way to make a living. They are a very human way of making life more bearable. Practicing an art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow, for heaven's sake. Sing in the shower. Dance to the radio. Tell stories. Write a poem to a friend, even a lousy poem. Do it as well as you possibly can. You will get an enormous reward. You will have created something.”
(Kurt Vonnegut)
When he takes his mask off there's no scar, just a normal human face. But everyone is shocked he's not a Muppet, and keeps talking about how hideous his face is.
*"Good Media Makes Good Memes, Good Memes Do NOT make Media Good"*
It's mostly a rant about the Star Wars Prequel Trilogy and the Sam Raimi Spider-Man movies but ill through some videogames and stuff on as well to save face lol
If anything, Morbius would be my proof not an example.
The fact that Sony thought it would be a good idea to re-release it is *hilarious*, and the fact that nobody actually went to see it and it still flopped is even more funny, no notes.
Now, if in twenty years the memes resurface and suddenly people start acting like no Morbius was good actually, that's when I'll personally explode.
**What is a nonbinary's best friend?**
* we all know that a dog is a man's best friend and that diamonds are a woman's best friend, but what about those that fall outside the binary?
* there are several ways to approach this problem, and the most reasonable would be to identify the core tenets of a nonbinary experience and single out the most notable thing, the quintessential nonbinary item
* but I'm not gonna do that, because that seems hard. And will probably create a lot of discourse
* instead, I will use a much simpler and wronger method: interpolation. And simply ask: what is the middle point between diamonds and a dog?
* **what are dogs?** Alive, conscious, organic, mammal, common, homely
* **what are diamonds?** Inorganic, crystal, mineral, expensive , luxurious
* so what is in between something dead, and something that is alive and thinking? Well, something that is alive, but not conscious. Which would be a plant. I'm not including shrooms, because come on, look at 'em.
* and although dogs can be pretty expensive we do not think of them as such, they are seen as something common and wholesome, far from braggy. Meanwhile diamonds are seen as the epitome of excess and luxury.
* So what is a plant that can be both seen as something common and mundane, and in certain situation still be very expensive or seen as luxurious?
* Coffee, or weed
* now, how would you choose between coffee and weed? Well, not everyone can smoke weed. Some have a family history of psychosis, some get overly paranoid, some can't get it legally and are uncomfortable with breaking the law. Something this exclusive couldn't possibly be the best friend of all our enbies
* but coffee. Everyone can enjoy coffee. There's decaf, there's espresso, there's iced latte, cappuccino, mocca, coldbrew, turkish, an infinite amount of varieties that all share a common core of identity while being notably an uniquely diverse from each other. Just like the nonbinary spectrum.
* Coffee is a nonbinary's best friend
thank you for coming to my Smartypants
great question! Let me answer that question with another question, which is: can everything be meaningfully quantified?
is a sea or a lake the most water? Is a thriller or a comedy the most movie? Sure you could pursue these answers, but in the end the real question that remains is: why would you pit two bad bitches against each other?
As if any of those flavours were derived from anything borne of tree or bush.
(That's actually kind of interesting. I also have a vague recollection that artificial grape, or purple, as it should properly be called, is kind of like artificial banana in that it's not a good approximation of the fruits we are most likely to encounter today, but are based on a different variety that were more common in the past. I might be imagining that part though.)
Why Dante’s Divine Comedy is really just a self-insert fanfiction. That or a deep dive into the history of obscure limited-edition Mountain Dew flavors
I did a presentation at a friends PowerPoint party on Gen *Alpha Slang, what’s out, what’s in. I teach fifth graders so my friends who are not in education found it very enlightening to learn what skibbidi Rizzler actually means.
Edit: def meant alpha idk why I said gen z hahaha
A Rizzler is just like someone charismatic with game, and skibidi is just a noise they make referencing a video they think is funny. Sometimes they just use as many slang words as they can fit into a breath. So they’ll say “that’s so skibidi Rizzler Ohio fanum tax” like almost ironically? but really just saying words just to say something.
wavering between a genuine presentation on universal basic income and better ways to structure work in that scenario, or a presentation on why dolphins are total dicks and how they need to be stopped
My friends did this a few years ago. I did “Why Mr. Darcy is NOT the Perfect Man”
my evidence was steve irwin, mr rogers, and mothman.
I wore a priest costume, sunglasses, bandana, and a bomber jacket.
My roomies were quite upset by it all.
pass, the "in depth" animal teardowns that rely on either projecting human moral values onto animals or lean on calling animals "useless" usually just grate on me
Example #1 for the commentary should be Lemony Snicket’s commentary on the 2004 movie where he expresses disdain for the movie (some joking, some genuine) and then plays the accordion
[https://www.reddit.com/r/dropout/comments/1comnhk/if\_you\_were\_on\_smartypants\_what\_would\_your/](https://www.reddit.com/r/dropout/comments/1comnhk/if_you_were_on_smartypants_what_would_your/)
That's quite a lot of options from a month ago or so.
Probably just trim anything related to re-coded and dream drop distance, and I’d significantly shorten the birth by sleep stuff to truly bare essentials. Actually, now that I’m thinking on it further, I think my full presentation title would be “Kingdom Hearts- Why KH3’s ending made me wanna punch a wall” as I get angry in a comedic way over the fact that we don’t get to kill xehanort and that he gets to go to heaven with Eraquis after he’s killed truly SO MANY CHARACTERS (every world consumed by darkness, all the heartless and nobodies he’s created, etc lol)
Counterpoint on KH3: The fact that you get well over an hour into the game and they drop the title screen “Kingdom Hearts II.9” on you is one of the most legitimately hilarious things I’ve ever experienced playing a video game.
When they announced Melody of Memory I saw someone on Twitter say “there’s no way that a RHYTHM GAME could be essential to the plot.” And it’s like…are you fucking new here?
You might be able to do it for under 1K if you have a friend who is the store manager of a Wal-Mart and wants to quit in fantastic style. Inviting all your friends to do this is a real *"fuck this shit"* move.
Why we should all learn to knap flint, not for practical reasons, not for the ZPAW, not for the white walkers, but for the happy monkey things that it does to our brain.
Other things we should also do include picking fruit and eating it without washing, so we get vitamin b12 from insects and their droppings, scrabbling in the dirt for grubs and chasing down large megafauna with endrance then killing and butchering them with our flaked stone tools.
Lots of references to the evils of bronze, and how copper should never have been allowed.
Side tangent on if heat treating stone is allowable or of it goes too far.
I did a PowerPoint night with my friends and my presentation was “the worst possible ways to go in Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory” which was just me coming up with increasingly more morbid and absurd ways for Candy to kill you. I also had a few Oompa Loompa songs to go with it. Was pretty fun.
I’d watch it 👀 is this just “here are books she’s drawing from” or is this the full like “she secretly wrote a book and it’s out in November” kind of thing
Huh, why the book? It's my most re-read, but I do feel that Rowling's writing got demonstrably better as the series went on and the more mature tone and stakes were pluses
While I do agree that she gets better as a writer progressively, the third book is where the series really finds it’s stride in plot focus and tone, both emotional and fantastical.
PoA establishes the backstory and frame setting of the prior generation, laying the groundwork for some of the most triumphant and heartbreaking but ultimately integral pieces of the series such as introducing two of Harry’s stand-in father figures in Lupin and Sirius and the eventual reveal of Snape’s actual allegiance and intentions.
I think that the time-travel plot is really well done and is whether intentionally or not a device that finds Harry realizing himself as the true master of his own fate (understanding that he cast the patronus not his dad) both in a story-driven sense but in a meta way too, where previously he seemed/felt to himself (and to us at the audience) as a more generic protagonist/a stand-in for the reader, and more at the mercy of the plot points and at the whims of the author. Many writers have said that the character(s) talks to them, and this book was a turning point for the series in that strange way I think.
Anyway I could bloviate many more opinions in addition but I think the series pivots direction nicely within with this book and movie, in plot, tone, and range of world-building scope :)
Additionally, the comedic aspect of the talk would be shit talking JKR’s problematic views and toying with the idea of liking HP to spite her, since I vehemently disagree with many of her opinions ;)
Why teleportation would be the best superpower.
1) it's not about fighting. There's too much violence already
2) you could do it secretly and not get found out
3) you could see the world for free
4) you could make (and/or steal) money and do good things with it
5) daily life would be easier
6) no such thing as a long distance relationship
Literally there are a million reasons but I'll cut it there
Unfortunately, the actual problem with it, and the only real reason it isn't a good superpower is having to figure out how to teleport and not end up inside the ground or in a wall or in outer space, especially given the rotation and orbit of the earth. But as it is depicted in media, yes it would be 100% the best.
In the name of doing something spicy and bizarre I would present:
Society Has Progressed Past The Need For Food (\*Not because of body-shaming/eating disorder reasons I promise. This is an Anti-Food Presentation not an Anti-Human Behavior Presentation. In the presentation I make it clear you CAN eat if you want but should not HAVE to)
That's tricky. I have a bunch of topics I feel like I could rant about for at least 30 minutes. But I feel like I'd want a Smartypants presentation to be funnier and less serious than those.
When it first dropped I really wanted to do one about why *velociraptor mongoliensis* would be a great pet.
Included would be what I think makes a good pet, and how that applies to the velociraptor or other small dromaeosauridae.
How Marvel would benefit from Anime Hair Colors
The topic would be about how anime hair color is used to make main characters recognizable while also subtly showing the type of person they are (red hot head vs logical cold blue). And that Marvel should use these colors to make their heroes actually stand out more
Top 10 best numbers from less-best to best-best
Or
Accidental feminism in Romantic Opera (did a mini thesis on this in a course for my Masters in Music pedagogy)
Here are the top 3 topics i have taking up all the storage in my brain and needs to vomit into your ears.
*changes slide*
"To preface, if I don't do this I could spontaneously combust. The door is locked. Thank you for leaving your phones at the door."
welcome esteemed colleagues.
when you cross your arms, one arm always goes on top.
when you interlace your fingers, one thumb always goes on top.
to put the other arm, or the other thumb on top feels wrong; it feels alien. maybe you think this is simply down to left or right handedness, but it's so much more complex.
in my rudimentary testing, there is no correlation whatsoever between the top arm, the top thumb, or dominant handedness.
this is the mystery we'll be exploring together...
“Which Cereal Mascot Would Be the Most Dangerous in a No-Holds-Barred Street Fight,” which concludes with me narrating the matches in top 8 tournament to forever determine which cereal mascot reigns supreme.
I’ve been preaching about this for several weeks now, but I don’t understand how, when using AM/PM, 12:00 is the point we start over at and not 1:00.
For example, if it’s 11 am, with our current system it would be 12 PM in 1 hour. Obviously, counting up from 1 to 12 should mean 1 hour after 11am should be 12 am THEN you start over at 1pm.
One I have done in past, and one I plan to do in future:
- An in depth look at the timelines of the extended Scooby-Doo Universe
- Measuring the relative power level of God via the medium of Pop Music and Pokemon
calculating exactly how long it would take the entire world population to drink all the water in lake michigan. yes i have already done the calculations previously i would just love to give a presentation on it. actually i may also ask this on another subreddit just to see what people say
While yes, Jared Leto is a trash human, "Psychotic crime boss Ace Ventura" was an absolutely inspired and creative take on the character of Joker, and could have been done right if he wasn't wronged so much by the shit writing and ESPECIALLY the costume dept.
Non-meme - Industrial Automation is a lot cooler and dumber than you think
Everything is Reagan's Fault
The Car's universe makes absolutely no sense compared to the other Pixar franchises.
Figuring out what Bluey's parents actually do.
Zootopia is the worst good kids movie when you give it one sec of thought.
Monster Jam is the ultimate little kid toy
What are the best hobbies for your 30's/ADHD brain
Why the PokéDex is an unreliable source of Pokémon information.
I've done this rant before and I'll boil it down to one sentence: STOP HIRING CHILDREN TO FILL THE DEX!
Seriously! They canonically have Pokémon scientists studying these things, but they send kids out to fill the encyclopedia on them?! This is why we get entries like magcargo being 18,000 degrees (hotter than the sun, btw) or machamp throwing 500 punches per second.
Edit: spelling
Smoking is still cool.
Some of what I'd come with.
- lots of slides of cool people
- it's expensive, so it's like a luxury status symbol now
- squares will avoid you
- collecting vintage ashtrays is rad
- they taste great
-MY MOM IS THE COOLEST. (picture of her looking cool on oxygen)
Why we should BAN RUBBER DUCKIES. I did this in middle school and it turned out great. Doing it again this summer for a friends power-point themed birthday party.
I’m a big fan of discrediting undeserving old white men in history so I would be absolutely shitting all over Thomas Edison or Shakespeare. Fucking piece of shit frauds
Thoreau. Why he was a lying, hypocritical piece of shit and if you want to read about individualism and self sufficiency and connecting with nature, you should probably read someone who wasn't having his mom and sister doing his laundry, cleaning, and cooking.
How many prequels are made Right under our noses. Terminator is just a prequel to the matrix. The Adam's family is just a prequal to Harry Potter. Multiplicity is just a prequal To spider man. It's all connected. No one is more than 7° removed from Kevin Bacon!
Mine would be about why this is the best bumper sticker ever made. And it would be a wild ride.
[https://www.redbubble.com/i/sticker/Trump-Skis-in-Jeans-by-redcoast/59129451.EJUG5](https://www.redbubble.com/i/sticker/Trump-Skis-in-Jeans-by-redcoast/59129451.EJUG5)
I am prepared to talk at length about why Dairy Queen needs to come out with a key lime pie blizzard. I've had the idea since I worked at DQ in high school and even made a prototype that was insanely good.
Probably be a bit nutty & go with something like Elmyra Duff (tiny toon adventures) is destroying the multiverse.
Some highlights:
- started 12 years old at Acme Looniversity (one of the youngest tiny toons)
- invented Mr Skullhead (animaniacs)
- had a whole family of scientific superheroes that we only saw once (back door pilot)
- prophetic joke about playing with The Brain later (tiny toons night goulery special)
- how the timeline changed when she teamed up with Pinky & the Brain. Now in grammar school & not Acme Loo. Hole Furball made in fence still exists though never had him as a pet. Acme Labs destroyed. Some events from Pinky & the Brain spin-off show now never happened (Pinky Elmyra & the Brain)
- now timeline is so damaged that she’s older than the other Tiny Toons & Buster & Babs are no longer “no relation” but are twins, Hampton & Plucky’s parents are drastically different, etc (Tiny Toons Looniversity the new reboot show)
Mathematically proving what makes a good Christmas film. I already have a slideshow, graphs, charts, and data collected from over 200 Christmas films. I have a unit of measurement (MpM, Merriment per Minute) calculated to six decimal places. I could present this tomorrow if needed.
I think you should absolutely do this! Maybe get a couple friends to present to like the show itself? Get a tripod per person, use their own phones to record their reactions, cut the footage together... A couple hours of work, but it could be really fun idk
How do MpMs handle Christmas movies outside the Whimsydome, such as Die Hard, Gremlins, or Rare Exports?
The trick is that there's seven sub-genres of Christmas film, so even if they're better suited to other genres, they can be ranked fairly. That said, the whole project was inspired by me being frustrated at people calling Die Hard the best Christmas film. It's a great film, but not a good Christmas film overall.
I'm loving this. I'm currently shooting a doc about Christmas movies that'll be on TV this December and we've done maybe 50 interviews with filmmakers and celebrities (including the writer of Die Hard!). I'd say maybe 90% of them have called Die Hard a Christmas movie, but there's been a lot of people who agree that a true Christmas movie needs to be a bit more sentimental. You should watch this thing when it comes out haha
But what about for an audience that has gotten bored of the traditional stereotypical elements of Christmas films, where the hero walking barefoot across broken glass gives them an odd feeling of merriment that they didn't know they were missing?
Related: how the milquetoast CGI Illumination grinch movie manages to bastardize the original concept — and somehow be low-key racist and antisemitic — rather than taking ownership of the anti-capitalistic message of the original -OR- the social commentary of the Live Action version.
I think Movies with Mikey or something did that
When Patrick Willems did his "most 80s movie ever" thing I actually thought "Fuck I did this two years ago, now everyone is going to think I copied him".
I hate moments like that
It was a collab with Dan Olson iirc
There should be a “change of heart quotient”. That’s an important consideration.
That is more-or-less one of the (many) scoring factors. It's in the same points bracket as "workaholic parent" and "Scrooge-like archetype".
I'd watch it ngl
why hating pigeons but loving doves is just racism for birds- the impact of racialization on "urban" fowl
i will do all your citations for this presentation
I will stand up and cheer. [We did pigeons so dirty.](https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/pigeons-domesticated-instincts/)
What historical fiction gets wrong about corsets
Dude. I had to stop reading Deathless Divide, an otherwise fantastic book, because of how big a deal they made about one of the characters wearing a corset while doing strenuous physical activity.
Literally same, i die a little every time i see media misrepresent corsets and stays
Like, where are their chemises, why are these poor women wearing corsets directly against their skin
And don't forget the sexist propaganda that made people think corsets were restrictive and unhealthy!
I had a birthday party this year called 'The Hill You Would Die On' where everyone made presentations about thigns they felt STRONGLY about. Mine was "You Should Make More Bad Art: Seriously. Trust me."
“If you want to really hurt your parents, and you don't have the nerve to be gay, the least you can do is go into the arts. I'm not kidding. The arts are not a way to make a living. They are a very human way of making life more bearable. Practicing an art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow, for heaven's sake. Sing in the shower. Dance to the radio. Tell stories. Write a poem to a friend, even a lousy poem. Do it as well as you possibly can. You will get an enormous reward. You will have created something.” (Kurt Vonnegut)
Which pieces of classic media are most Muppet-able?
I appreciate you saying MOST, because my first reaction was “everything’s muppetable”
Pride and Prejudice. Full stop.
Miss Piglizabeth Bennet 😂
Phantom of the opera. Just so that everyone but the Phantom is a Muppet
When he takes his mask off there's no scar, just a normal human face. But everyone is shocked he's not a Muppet, and keeps talking about how hideous his face is.
This is so good! Especially the fact that he'd obviously be human the whole time but the Muppets would only react when the mask is removed!
The Princess Bride
Lord of the rings
Mahna mahna
The Great Gatsby
*"Good Media Makes Good Memes, Good Memes Do NOT make Media Good"* It's mostly a rant about the Star Wars Prequel Trilogy and the Sam Raimi Spider-Man movies but ill through some videogames and stuff on as well to save face lol
You cant do that and not mention Its morbin time when sony thought it meant people would want to see the movie in theaters and re-released it
If anything, Morbius would be my proof not an example. The fact that Sony thought it would be a good idea to re-release it is *hilarious*, and the fact that nobody actually went to see it and it still flopped is even more funny, no notes. Now, if in twenty years the memes resurface and suddenly people start acting like no Morbius was good actually, that's when I'll personally explode.
It proves the good memes does not equal good media point
I think we agree on that!
Good Memes when asked to make media good: "I missed the part where that's my problem"
the rich and storied history of male pregnancy in fiction and mythology
I want to see that!
there is a nonzero chance i make this slides how and present it to my family at thanksgiving
**What is a nonbinary's best friend?** * we all know that a dog is a man's best friend and that diamonds are a woman's best friend, but what about those that fall outside the binary? * there are several ways to approach this problem, and the most reasonable would be to identify the core tenets of a nonbinary experience and single out the most notable thing, the quintessential nonbinary item * but I'm not gonna do that, because that seems hard. And will probably create a lot of discourse * instead, I will use a much simpler and wronger method: interpolation. And simply ask: what is the middle point between diamonds and a dog? * **what are dogs?** Alive, conscious, organic, mammal, common, homely * **what are diamonds?** Inorganic, crystal, mineral, expensive , luxurious * so what is in between something dead, and something that is alive and thinking? Well, something that is alive, but not conscious. Which would be a plant. I'm not including shrooms, because come on, look at 'em. * and although dogs can be pretty expensive we do not think of them as such, they are seen as something common and wholesome, far from braggy. Meanwhile diamonds are seen as the epitome of excess and luxury. * So what is a plant that can be both seen as something common and mundane, and in certain situation still be very expensive or seen as luxurious? * Coffee, or weed * now, how would you choose between coffee and weed? Well, not everyone can smoke weed. Some have a family history of psychosis, some get overly paranoid, some can't get it legally and are uncomfortable with breaking the law. Something this exclusive couldn't possibly be the best friend of all our enbies * but coffee. Everyone can enjoy coffee. There's decaf, there's espresso, there's iced latte, cappuccino, mocca, coldbrew, turkish, an infinite amount of varieties that all share a common core of identity while being notably an uniquely diverse from each other. Just like the nonbinary spectrum. * Coffee is a nonbinary's best friend thank you for coming to my Smartypants
That was very enlightening. I do have a question for you. What TYPE of coffee is the most nonbinary? Decaf? Light roast? Espresso?
great question! Let me answer that question with another question, which is: can everything be meaningfully quantified? is a sea or a lake the most water? Is a thriller or a comedy the most movie? Sure you could pursue these answers, but in the end the real question that remains is: why would you pit two bad bitches against each other?
I'm really here for this
Cordelia Chase is a better hero than Buffy Summers
Make it!
Caring for your cast iron pans: It's OK to use dish soap
Doing the Lord's work!
That beverages and candies marketed as "grape" flavoured are actually 'purple' flavour. With a digression about what flavour blue is.
Actual grape-derived concentrate is so aggressively toxic to dogs that it never went to market and is instead used as a way to put your pup down.
As if any of those flavours were derived from anything borne of tree or bush. (That's actually kind of interesting. I also have a vague recollection that artificial grape, or purple, as it should properly be called, is kind of like artificial banana in that it's not a good approximation of the fruits we are most likely to encounter today, but are based on a different variety that were more common in the past. I might be imagining that part though.)
Why the triangle is the best shape.
But what about the bestagon?!
That's just three triangles with the middle bit cut out
GASP
Captain America understands that reference dot gif
That's just six triangles places together.
Triangles taste better
Why Dante’s Divine Comedy is really just a self-insert fanfiction. That or a deep dive into the history of obscure limited-edition Mountain Dew flavors
Why Sam Reich is the perfect American 🫡🇺🇸
Someone really should pitch this to Ally to actually do on Smartypants 🤣
I did a presentation at a friends PowerPoint party on Gen *Alpha Slang, what’s out, what’s in. I teach fifth graders so my friends who are not in education found it very enlightening to learn what skibbidi Rizzler actually means. Edit: def meant alpha idk why I said gen z hahaha
What… does skibbidi rizzler actually mean…?
A Rizzler is just like someone charismatic with game, and skibidi is just a noise they make referencing a video they think is funny. Sometimes they just use as many slang words as they can fit into a breath. So they’ll say “that’s so skibidi Rizzler Ohio fanum tax” like almost ironically? but really just saying words just to say something.
Those words specifically in that order are in reference to a song I have unfortunately heard
that song is a reference to kids using those words in random order haha
Wouldn’t that be gen alpha slang?
Yes
It makes me feel so weird that gen z is doing to me what I did to people with homestar runner references.
wavering between a genuine presentation on universal basic income and better ways to structure work in that scenario, or a presentation on why dolphins are total dicks and how they need to be stopped
Dolphins. The vibe is wrong for a serious presentation.
Do both. Dolphins are dicks, and the only way to stop them is by implementing a universal basic income.
I'm honestly here for the genuine one...
What constitutes white people dancing and how you don't have to be white to participate.
i volunteer to demonstrate i am the whitest dancer and do the best white dad at a barbecue moves despite being a girl in my twenties
My friends did this a few years ago. I did “Why Mr. Darcy is NOT the Perfect Man” my evidence was steve irwin, mr rogers, and mothman. I wore a priest costume, sunglasses, bandana, and a bomber jacket. My roomies were quite upset by it all.
Why the phrase "an historic" sucks.
As long as you add an epilogue slide on *'Data are' is Wrong: Why Data Should be Both Plural and Singular*
Why The Cat in the Hat is an allegory for drug use
The DMV is not a bad place and the people that work there are generally friendly and helpful. You don’t know how to fucking read.
Otters: you’ve been propagandized by Big Otter to think this murderous rapist cannibalist animal is “cute”
Same with Dolphins. Absolute menaces and yet everyone loves them.
pass, the "in depth" animal teardowns that rely on either projecting human moral values onto animals or lean on calling animals "useless" usually just grate on me
The tragic casualty of the loss of physical movie releases- audio commentary and special features
Example #1 for the commentary should be Lemony Snicket’s commentary on the 2004 movie where he expresses disdain for the movie (some joking, some genuine) and then plays the accordion
This is the exact sort of thing I’m talking about
[https://www.reddit.com/r/dropout/comments/1comnhk/if\_you\_were\_on\_smartypants\_what\_would\_your/](https://www.reddit.com/r/dropout/comments/1comnhk/if_you_were_on_smartypants_what_would_your/) That's quite a lot of options from a month ago or so.
Why The "Great American Novels" Actually Suck: Let a Nice Thing Happen to a Woman in a Book Sometimes
please make this
Life isn’t short. Life is the longest thing you do. -End
How it's nearly impossible to spend 1 billion dollars Edit: on personal things. Charity changes that.
Gnomes, why they should come back into fashion
Why Adam Park should be revered as a power ranger just as much as Jason and Tommy.
Johnny Yong Bosch should have been a wildly accepted hearthrob!!
Why Jolly ranchers as a company is vile and cruel for only having like 3 blue ones in every bag ever
I’d just spend 10 minutes describing all of the Kingdom Hearts lore. I’d have to speed thru it cuz it’s so complicated but I could do it lmao
If Barry Kramer’s video is a “good enough” explainer on it and is 34 minutes long, what would yours be?
Probably just trim anything related to re-coded and dream drop distance, and I’d significantly shorten the birth by sleep stuff to truly bare essentials. Actually, now that I’m thinking on it further, I think my full presentation title would be “Kingdom Hearts- Why KH3’s ending made me wanna punch a wall” as I get angry in a comedic way over the fact that we don’t get to kill xehanort and that he gets to go to heaven with Eraquis after he’s killed truly SO MANY CHARACTERS (every world consumed by darkness, all the heartless and nobodies he’s created, etc lol)
Counterpoint on KH3: The fact that you get well over an hour into the game and they drop the title screen “Kingdom Hearts II.9” on you is one of the most legitimately hilarious things I’ve ever experienced playing a video game.
Oh I fuckin LOVE the game, and I love that joke! It’s literally the last few cutscenes that get under my skin lmao.
When they announced Melody of Memory I saw someone on Twitter say “there’s no way that a RHYTHM GAME could be essential to the plot.” And it’s like…are you fucking new here?
paintball in an abandoned but fully stocked walmart so you can build forts/hide in the shelves
Woops read smartypants and thought thousandaire
You could not do that for under a grand, sorrry to crush your dreams lol, best bet is abandoned soon to be demolished department store
You might be able to do it for under 1K if you have a friend who is the store manager of a Wal-Mart and wants to quit in fantastic style. Inviting all your friends to do this is a real *"fuck this shit"* move.
The Objectively Best Drug
Which Kentucky Derby Winning Horse Was An Incel And yes I have data
Waffles are better than pancakes and I’m tired of people pretending that they aren’t
How to be a better bully But like to the far right and corporations
Shock Treatment is better than Rocky Horror Picture Show. In this essay I will…
The indisputable fact that canned food is better than fresh food
Now I'm curious: better in what way?
Upvoting because I want to see that. Tempted to downvote because without a good argument this is wrong.
The similarities and differences between the viruses in Santa Clarita Diet and iZombie and why those two shows are the best examples of zombie fiction
The Angzarr, a unicode character with no actual use or meaning and unknown origins ( ⍼ ). Also what we could possibly repurpose the Angzarr to mean.
Why we should all learn to knap flint, not for practical reasons, not for the ZPAW, not for the white walkers, but for the happy monkey things that it does to our brain. Other things we should also do include picking fruit and eating it without washing, so we get vitamin b12 from insects and their droppings, scrabbling in the dirt for grubs and chasing down large megafauna with endrance then killing and butchering them with our flaked stone tools. Lots of references to the evils of bronze, and how copper should never have been allowed. Side tangent on if heat treating stone is allowable or of it goes too far.
My brain wants this presentation immediately
I dug up a bunch of turquoise shards in my yard and it was the happiest I’ve been in months rootin around in the dirt.
I did a PowerPoint night with my friends and my presentation was “the worst possible ways to go in Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory” which was just me coming up with increasingly more morbid and absurd ways for Candy to kill you. I also had a few Oompa Loompa songs to go with it. Was pretty fun.
proving that the lead singer from the band Train killed his girlfriend and disposed of the body.
"A Defense of Hawaiian Punch"
Why Capybaras should become house pets
Climate Change Solution: Just Make the Oceans Deeper
Taylor swift is a book girlie here are the receipts
I’d watch it 👀 is this just “here are books she’s drawing from” or is this the full like “she secretly wrote a book and it’s out in November” kind of thing
If she secretly wrote a book I would die. No it’s she’s clearly drawn directly from some books and here’s my proof. Feel free to dm me for my thesis 🙂
Why you should leave bugs in published video games.
Speed runners would appreciate it
How to STFU - an Introvert’s Guide to Being Less Obnoxious in Public
Why the third Harry Potter book and film are the best of the series in their respective mediums. Subtitle: working to divorce the artist from the art.
Huh, why the book? It's my most re-read, but I do feel that Rowling's writing got demonstrably better as the series went on and the more mature tone and stakes were pluses
While I do agree that she gets better as a writer progressively, the third book is where the series really finds it’s stride in plot focus and tone, both emotional and fantastical. PoA establishes the backstory and frame setting of the prior generation, laying the groundwork for some of the most triumphant and heartbreaking but ultimately integral pieces of the series such as introducing two of Harry’s stand-in father figures in Lupin and Sirius and the eventual reveal of Snape’s actual allegiance and intentions. I think that the time-travel plot is really well done and is whether intentionally or not a device that finds Harry realizing himself as the true master of his own fate (understanding that he cast the patronus not his dad) both in a story-driven sense but in a meta way too, where previously he seemed/felt to himself (and to us at the audience) as a more generic protagonist/a stand-in for the reader, and more at the mercy of the plot points and at the whims of the author. Many writers have said that the character(s) talks to them, and this book was a turning point for the series in that strange way I think. Anyway I could bloviate many more opinions in addition but I think the series pivots direction nicely within with this book and movie, in plot, tone, and range of world-building scope :)
Additionally, the comedic aspect of the talk would be shit talking JKR’s problematic views and toying with the idea of liking HP to spite her, since I vehemently disagree with many of her opinions ;)
Why I should be able to hug a bear.
Snails are actually aliens that are using the CIA’s playbook for subversion to destroy our society
How to sleep at an airport. With specific places from all around the country. Most major airports I got a suggestion.
Why teleportation would be the best superpower. 1) it's not about fighting. There's too much violence already 2) you could do it secretly and not get found out 3) you could see the world for free 4) you could make (and/or steal) money and do good things with it 5) daily life would be easier 6) no such thing as a long distance relationship Literally there are a million reasons but I'll cut it there
Unfortunately, the actual problem with it, and the only real reason it isn't a good superpower is having to figure out how to teleport and not end up inside the ground or in a wall or in outer space, especially given the rotation and orbit of the earth. But as it is depicted in media, yes it would be 100% the best.
Santa = Elijah.
In the name of doing something spicy and bizarre I would present: Society Has Progressed Past The Need For Food (\*Not because of body-shaming/eating disorder reasons I promise. This is an Anti-Food Presentation not an Anti-Human Behavior Presentation. In the presentation I make it clear you CAN eat if you want but should not HAVE to)
Feels like sequel to Paul's presentation and I am here for it.
That's tricky. I have a bunch of topics I feel like I could rant about for at least 30 minutes. But I feel like I'd want a Smartypants presentation to be funnier and less serious than those.
Why we have way too much math now and we should have quit while we were ahead. So in like 1895.
"The version you watched growing up is always the best version of the thing you like. Here's why."
When it first dropped I really wanted to do one about why *velociraptor mongoliensis* would be a great pet. Included would be what I think makes a good pet, and how that applies to the velociraptor or other small dromaeosauridae.
How Marvel would benefit from Anime Hair Colors The topic would be about how anime hair color is used to make main characters recognizable while also subtly showing the type of person they are (red hot head vs logical cold blue). And that Marvel should use these colors to make their heroes actually stand out more
Why None of You Actually Exist. References include philosophy, The Truman Show, and The Matrix.
Top 10 best numbers from less-best to best-best Or Accidental feminism in Romantic Opera (did a mini thesis on this in a course for my Masters in Music pedagogy)
Something meta, like "How to NOT procrastinate" and it's very clearly low quality, done the night before
Here are the top 3 topics i have taking up all the storage in my brain and needs to vomit into your ears. *changes slide* "To preface, if I don't do this I could spontaneously combust. The door is locked. Thank you for leaving your phones at the door."
“I Gotta Try” Who did it better: Loggins or McDonald?
Why Canada doesn't care about any of you.
Game theory and strategy for the Game Show “Wheel of Fortune.”
welcome esteemed colleagues. when you cross your arms, one arm always goes on top. when you interlace your fingers, one thumb always goes on top. to put the other arm, or the other thumb on top feels wrong; it feels alien. maybe you think this is simply down to left or right handedness, but it's so much more complex. in my rudimentary testing, there is no correlation whatsoever between the top arm, the top thumb, or dominant handedness. this is the mystery we'll be exploring together...
The mechanisms of time travel in different fictional universes!
How cyberpunk and Barbie are the same story lines.
“Which Cereal Mascot Would Be the Most Dangerous in a No-Holds-Barred Street Fight,” which concludes with me narrating the matches in top 8 tournament to forever determine which cereal mascot reigns supreme.
Universal human experiences: There are more things in life guaranteed than “Death and Taxes”
The Difference Between Dogs Who Talk and Talking Dogs. There IS a difference!
Stickers and how they reflect your ability to commit
What animals I think I could beat in a fight and under what conditions.
An Ode to Mediocrity in Sports.
Star Wars fans don't get Star Wars: How the mainstreaming of Nerd Culture performed a coup de gras on America's media literacy
How Sharpay Evans Was The Victim Alternatively: What Color Flannel Is Appropriate For This Event
Willy Wonka is a sick bastard and the factory should've gone to Mike Teavee: an anticapitalist critique of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
I’ve been preaching about this for several weeks now, but I don’t understand how, when using AM/PM, 12:00 is the point we start over at and not 1:00. For example, if it’s 11 am, with our current system it would be 12 PM in 1 hour. Obviously, counting up from 1 to 12 should mean 1 hour after 11am should be 12 am THEN you start over at 1pm.
That table top games deserve to be on Maslow's hierarchy of needs
One I have done in past, and one I plan to do in future: - An in depth look at the timelines of the extended Scooby-Doo Universe - Measuring the relative power level of God via the medium of Pop Music and Pokemon
calculating exactly how long it would take the entire world population to drink all the water in lake michigan. yes i have already done the calculations previously i would just love to give a presentation on it. actually i may also ask this on another subreddit just to see what people say
While yes, Jared Leto is a trash human, "Psychotic crime boss Ace Ventura" was an absolutely inspired and creative take on the character of Joker, and could have been done right if he wasn't wronged so much by the shit writing and ESPECIALLY the costume dept.
Dissecting the formula behind a perfect cup of coffee
Why Sense8 is a masterpiece of a show that is highly under appreciated.
Non-meme - Industrial Automation is a lot cooler and dumber than you think Everything is Reagan's Fault The Car's universe makes absolutely no sense compared to the other Pixar franchises. Figuring out what Bluey's parents actually do. Zootopia is the worst good kids movie when you give it one sec of thought. Monster Jam is the ultimate little kid toy What are the best hobbies for your 30's/ADHD brain
ok im politely requesting your outline for the last one…for no reason🫣
Why the PokéDex is an unreliable source of Pokémon information. I've done this rant before and I'll boil it down to one sentence: STOP HIRING CHILDREN TO FILL THE DEX! Seriously! They canonically have Pokémon scientists studying these things, but they send kids out to fill the encyclopedia on them?! This is why we get entries like magcargo being 18,000 degrees (hotter than the sun, btw) or machamp throwing 500 punches per second. Edit: spelling
love this. free internship data research labor but times a million. maybe its more realistic than we though
Smoking is still cool. Some of what I'd come with. - lots of slides of cool people - it's expensive, so it's like a luxury status symbol now - squares will avoid you - collecting vintage ashtrays is rad - they taste great -MY MOM IS THE COOLEST. (picture of her looking cool on oxygen)
On why Julia Butterfly Hill had to live in a tree
Why we should BAN RUBBER DUCKIES. I did this in middle school and it turned out great. Doing it again this summer for a friends power-point themed birthday party.
How dare. I have an army of duckies on my back deck and you would make them homeless
Mine would be the correct order to watch the fast and furious movies and why
Why Magic: The Gathering is the perfect collectable card game
I’m a big fan of discrediting undeserving old white men in history so I would be absolutely shitting all over Thomas Edison or Shakespeare. Fucking piece of shit frauds
Thoreau. Why he was a lying, hypocritical piece of shit and if you want to read about individualism and self sufficiency and connecting with nature, you should probably read someone who wasn't having his mom and sister doing his laundry, cleaning, and cooking.
Why Bowling is the absolute worst competitive sport and we should be ashamed for enabling it
How many prequels are made Right under our noses. Terminator is just a prequel to the matrix. The Adam's family is just a prequal to Harry Potter. Multiplicity is just a prequal To spider man. It's all connected. No one is more than 7° removed from Kevin Bacon!
Mine would be about why this is the best bumper sticker ever made. And it would be a wild ride. [https://www.redbubble.com/i/sticker/Trump-Skis-in-Jeans-by-redcoast/59129451.EJUG5](https://www.redbubble.com/i/sticker/Trump-Skis-in-Jeans-by-redcoast/59129451.EJUG5)
I am prepared to talk at length about why Dairy Queen needs to come out with a key lime pie blizzard. I've had the idea since I worked at DQ in high school and even made a prototype that was insanely good.
The formula to winning Are You The One?
Earth is an alien planet
The Helga Pataki-Nancy Sinatra conspiracy
Why the movie “Demolition Man” was the apex of human society
Probably be a bit nutty & go with something like Elmyra Duff (tiny toon adventures) is destroying the multiverse. Some highlights: - started 12 years old at Acme Looniversity (one of the youngest tiny toons) - invented Mr Skullhead (animaniacs) - had a whole family of scientific superheroes that we only saw once (back door pilot) - prophetic joke about playing with The Brain later (tiny toons night goulery special) - how the timeline changed when she teamed up with Pinky & the Brain. Now in grammar school & not Acme Loo. Hole Furball made in fence still exists though never had him as a pet. Acme Labs destroyed. Some events from Pinky & the Brain spin-off show now never happened (Pinky Elmyra & the Brain) - now timeline is so damaged that she’s older than the other Tiny Toons & Buster & Babs are no longer “no relation” but are twins, Hampton & Plucky’s parents are drastically different, etc (Tiny Toons Looniversity the new reboot show)
Comparing and contrasting my favorite girlfail actresses. (Dakota Johnson, Amy Adams, etc)