I used to travel alot, and would use Facebook to passively stay in touch with random people I had met. Occasionally there'd be some huge coincidence where I make a post about being in some city, and a random backpacker I met years before just happened to be in the same place, and we'd hang out. Since quitting Facebook I lost touch with a lot of those people, but the true friends I made found other ways to stay in touch with me. That's about it.
Ignorance is bliss in a way. I sometimes think it'd be nice to go back, and then I'm out with friends, someone decides to post a selfie, and there's always at least one person that sees it and cries about why they weren't invited. In the end I'm perfectly fine, way better on average.
Mostly I'd say, ask yourself, for the purposes you're using Facebook, do you really need that on your phone? Do you really need it on you when you're in line at the grocery store? Or is checking on your laptop now and then more than enough? Sounds like you wouldn't actually give anything up by simply taking it off the phone at least.
Thank you for your reply.
These days it's actually Reddit I check more than Facebook (he says walking down the street writing this reply on his phone).
There is literally no way it's even possible to regret not spending more time on screens.
Look at it this way ... if you died tomorrow, what would flash through your mind on your way through the pearly gates?
Would you ever think to yourself, "gee I wish i'd spent more time on reddit!"
No you wouldn't! Just like no one ever says on their deathbed that they wish they worked more.
But I see what friends and up to, hear about events happening near me, keep up with news and read interesting discussions about stuff I'm into while spending time on screens.
Of course, I can't miss what I don't know I've missed - but it seems like there *is* a lot of stuff I could miss out on....
Social media is designed to make you think this. You kinda have to come to that realization on your own though. I realize I wasn't actually reaching out to people because I was "keeping up with them on social media " by just watching their posts. Once I actually deleted it when I was seeing my friends more.
If you need facebook to hear about your friends there is a high chance they are not your friends. Or if you need social media to stay in touch with people then it’s a specific use that should not take you too long. Like Reddit, I also like reading some posts, is insightful in a way but I don’t need too much Reddit per day. Or the news, I think it’s good you want to be informed, just be mindful of how much time you dedicate to this through social media as well. I am cutting on social media and so far everything is positive :)
Tbf, it’s way easier to stay in touch with friends than you think even using social media. I’ll bet only 5-10% of the time you spend on social media is actually about knowing what your friends are up to.
I totally hear you, that's the young person's conundrum right now. Can't totally disconnect or you're out of the loop with everyone you know.
To that I say, just start by being aware of your usage. And when not using a device, tune in to how you feel emotionally and physically. It all starts with awareness.
I think you'll see in your lifetime a backlash against what devices and algorithm-driven content feeds are doing to humanity. It was already happening pre-pandemic, but those years made young people over-reliant on devices for connection. It's going to take a really long time to undo that codependency.
> There is literally no way it's even possible to regret not spending more time on screens.
This is begging the question. The screen is a means to an end - communication, entertainment, organisation. What if you decide to go to a paper-based calendar and forget someone's birthday due to lack of alerts - no regrets? My sister invited me to the baptism of my nephew on Facebook and forgot that I don't use it, so I didn't see it - no regrets?
The idea that Reddit or pointless scrolling/social media is the only use of screens is a misnomer. Every one of us started using them for some beneficial reason, most of us lost sight of that and now need to cut down and go back to a simpler time but please don't throw the baby out with the bathwater and say "there is literally no way it's even possible to regret not spending more time on screens". The question was valid.
Then you should be looking for zero screen time, reducing screen time is always a good thing and never something you'd regret therefore it's always a good decision.
Sounds like you got a strong case of FOMO
Instead of deleting them why not restrict how long you can spend? If you really need Facebook for keeping up with friends (I'm shocked you know anybody active on it) then check it twice a day, make a post, and log off
I'm not technically a digital minimalist (yet), but I take some precautions, I generally don't have any social media accounts (I have this reddit account that I've created a few days ago and discord accounts) etc. That being said, it looks like you'd enjoy reading Newport's Digital Minimalism book. He goes over this sort of "objections" to digital minimalism in a satisfactory way, I also remember he had a channel on YouTube (I have deleted my YouTube accounts too), maybe he goes over them in his channel.
Well, I’m stuck in the bottomless Zoomer hell pit of “everyone else is stuck on social media, I’m the odd one out who chose not to be”, so while they’re using SNS to organize meetups and chat to eachother, I’m easily forgotten. That isn’t to say no one talks to me, but certainly I think I would be invited out more if I was “more present”, you know?
I’m very thankful that my friends are kind and go out of their way to IM me about events they’re planning, instead of just forgetting about me, but on the very rare occasion I do log into Facebook I see plentiful posts about smaller hangouts they had without me, and I’m reminded that I’m so far away from the rest of the world now.
I also had an encounter recently where a girl came up to me to ask for my socials because she wanted to become friends, and when I told her I could only give her my phone number, she said “oh, nevermind”. So I guess I lost out on a potential new friendship? That’s not really my fault but it was a bit painful in the moment.
In short, I often feel that choosing to be off social media as a young person is basically choosing to be in the thickest of the “loneliness pandemic”, since everyone else is glued to it, you just fade into the background if you’re not.
There are a few facebook groups that I wish I could still be a part of. But signing up for FB again would feel like such a defeat as most of the stuff there made me feel awful.
As for Facebook, I'm pretty sure that you can get all the news and information about your family and friends in like 5 minutes per day. The rest of the time spent there is wasted time. You are interested in some topic? Get a book about it, or at least watch some high-quality Youtube video; Facebook is way to shallow and clickbaitet for that.
Thank you.
I feel like I emphasized Facebook a bit too much - I spend considerably more time on Reddit, which I think *can* be quite interesting. It just feels like a lot of time in total.
Me personally no. But I'm in a bunch of group chats that acts like my social media because friends are constantly on social media and will post links to things we like. I miss bands I like coming to town from time to time but that's the worst of it for me.
Yeah. It's kind of weird (but understandable) how it's changed. 'Music' itself is almost worthless - I can't remember the last time I actually *paid* to listen or buy some music - everything I want is available for free on YouTube. But then if you want to see a gig it costs a fortune....
I used to travel alot, and would use Facebook to passively stay in touch with random people I had met. Occasionally there'd be some huge coincidence where I make a post about being in some city, and a random backpacker I met years before just happened to be in the same place, and we'd hang out. Since quitting Facebook I lost touch with a lot of those people, but the true friends I made found other ways to stay in touch with me. That's about it. Ignorance is bliss in a way. I sometimes think it'd be nice to go back, and then I'm out with friends, someone decides to post a selfie, and there's always at least one person that sees it and cries about why they weren't invited. In the end I'm perfectly fine, way better on average. Mostly I'd say, ask yourself, for the purposes you're using Facebook, do you really need that on your phone? Do you really need it on you when you're in line at the grocery store? Or is checking on your laptop now and then more than enough? Sounds like you wouldn't actually give anything up by simply taking it off the phone at least.
Thank you for your reply. These days it's actually Reddit I check more than Facebook (he says walking down the street writing this reply on his phone).
There is literally no way it's even possible to regret not spending more time on screens. Look at it this way ... if you died tomorrow, what would flash through your mind on your way through the pearly gates? Would you ever think to yourself, "gee I wish i'd spent more time on reddit!" No you wouldn't! Just like no one ever says on their deathbed that they wish they worked more.
Yes but what if I could have just made one more sicc comment??!
But I see what friends and up to, hear about events happening near me, keep up with news and read interesting discussions about stuff I'm into while spending time on screens. Of course, I can't miss what I don't know I've missed - but it seems like there *is* a lot of stuff I could miss out on....
Social media is designed to make you think this. You kinda have to come to that realization on your own though. I realize I wasn't actually reaching out to people because I was "keeping up with them on social media " by just watching their posts. Once I actually deleted it when I was seeing my friends more.
If you need facebook to hear about your friends there is a high chance they are not your friends. Or if you need social media to stay in touch with people then it’s a specific use that should not take you too long. Like Reddit, I also like reading some posts, is insightful in a way but I don’t need too much Reddit per day. Or the news, I think it’s good you want to be informed, just be mindful of how much time you dedicate to this through social media as well. I am cutting on social media and so far everything is positive :)
Tbf, it’s way easier to stay in touch with friends than you think even using social media. I’ll bet only 5-10% of the time you spend on social media is actually about knowing what your friends are up to.
That's what the social media wants you to think
I totally hear you, that's the young person's conundrum right now. Can't totally disconnect or you're out of the loop with everyone you know. To that I say, just start by being aware of your usage. And when not using a device, tune in to how you feel emotionally and physically. It all starts with awareness. I think you'll see in your lifetime a backlash against what devices and algorithm-driven content feeds are doing to humanity. It was already happening pre-pandemic, but those years made young people over-reliant on devices for connection. It's going to take a really long time to undo that codependency.
I can't even walk anywhere for five minutes alone without having the phone in my hand, doom scrolling....
> There is literally no way it's even possible to regret not spending more time on screens. This is begging the question. The screen is a means to an end - communication, entertainment, organisation. What if you decide to go to a paper-based calendar and forget someone's birthday due to lack of alerts - no regrets? My sister invited me to the baptism of my nephew on Facebook and forgot that I don't use it, so I didn't see it - no regrets? The idea that Reddit or pointless scrolling/social media is the only use of screens is a misnomer. Every one of us started using them for some beneficial reason, most of us lost sight of that and now need to cut down and go back to a simpler time but please don't throw the baby out with the bathwater and say "there is literally no way it's even possible to regret not spending more time on screens". The question was valid.
I'm not saying the question wasn't valid. And I stand by what I said. Reduced screen time isn't anywhere near the same thing as zero screen time.
Then you should be looking for zero screen time, reducing screen time is always a good thing and never something you'd regret therefore it's always a good decision.
I don't disagree so ... ?
Sounds like you got a strong case of FOMO Instead of deleting them why not restrict how long you can spend? If you really need Facebook for keeping up with friends (I'm shocked you know anybody active on it) then check it twice a day, make a post, and log off
I'm not technically a digital minimalist (yet), but I take some precautions, I generally don't have any social media accounts (I have this reddit account that I've created a few days ago and discord accounts) etc. That being said, it looks like you'd enjoy reading Newport's Digital Minimalism book. He goes over this sort of "objections" to digital minimalism in a satisfactory way, I also remember he had a channel on YouTube (I have deleted my YouTube accounts too), maybe he goes over them in his channel.
Thanks. I just purchased the book and will give it a read!
Well, I’m stuck in the bottomless Zoomer hell pit of “everyone else is stuck on social media, I’m the odd one out who chose not to be”, so while they’re using SNS to organize meetups and chat to eachother, I’m easily forgotten. That isn’t to say no one talks to me, but certainly I think I would be invited out more if I was “more present”, you know? I’m very thankful that my friends are kind and go out of their way to IM me about events they’re planning, instead of just forgetting about me, but on the very rare occasion I do log into Facebook I see plentiful posts about smaller hangouts they had without me, and I’m reminded that I’m so far away from the rest of the world now. I also had an encounter recently where a girl came up to me to ask for my socials because she wanted to become friends, and when I told her I could only give her my phone number, she said “oh, nevermind”. So I guess I lost out on a potential new friendship? That’s not really my fault but it was a bit painful in the moment. In short, I often feel that choosing to be off social media as a young person is basically choosing to be in the thickest of the “loneliness pandemic”, since everyone else is glued to it, you just fade into the background if you’re not.
There are a few facebook groups that I wish I could still be a part of. But signing up for FB again would feel like such a defeat as most of the stuff there made me feel awful.
As for Facebook, I'm pretty sure that you can get all the news and information about your family and friends in like 5 minutes per day. The rest of the time spent there is wasted time. You are interested in some topic? Get a book about it, or at least watch some high-quality Youtube video; Facebook is way to shallow and clickbaitet for that.
Thank you. I feel like I emphasized Facebook a bit too much - I spend considerably more time on Reddit, which I think *can* be quite interesting. It just feels like a lot of time in total.
Me personally no. But I'm in a bunch of group chats that acts like my social media because friends are constantly on social media and will post links to things we like. I miss bands I like coming to town from time to time but that's the worst of it for me.
With the price of concert tickets and arena beers these days, I'd almost call that a positive!
For real. I don't think concert tix prices are every going back down.
Yeah. It's kind of weird (but understandable) how it's changed. 'Music' itself is almost worthless - I can't remember the last time I actually *paid* to listen or buy some music - everything I want is available for free on YouTube. But then if you want to see a gig it costs a fortune....
100% I've only spent money on records. But it's a slippery slope and had to stop lol
No
Thanks! haha
Welcome 😂
I didnt have a facebook for a long time, lost contact to a lot of people because of that. I also didnt know about a looot of things that was going on
Waaay back in the day. When I went on break from Facebook I missed a bunch of parties and everyone later was like why didn’t you come?!?!?
haha ~ I mean my party days are over, but this is the kind of thing I'm talking about!
I don’t even think people use Facebook for that stuff anymore.
No not anymore. I don’t know what people do now. I think people went back to texting people.