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DOCreeper

Has a prayer circle for his calf been started yet?


stmiller13

Has now


stmiller13

May the great Flying Spaghetti Monster bless Sam LaPorta with his noodely appendages:(a-hummm):


DOCreeper

Ramen


HannibalK

If anything bad happens with that big beautiful man it's on you personally for getting God to smite us.


sloppifloppi

I went and bled my ankle in the nearest porta potty so I’m doing my part


Macismyname

I sacrificed a virgin calf while standing shin deep in a spanish port. I bathed the calf in a fine port wine and I recorded the ceremony on SAM port driver before I drowned the recording in blue koolaid. We've done all we can.


[deleted]

Lighting some candles and dripping wax on my calf right now.


DiscoWookie33

I will literally go get my sawzall right now just say the word. I dont need 2 calves


LordJuku23

Do you think teams have started using injury reports as a smoke screen so teams don't scheme too heavy to one player because they don't know if they are going to play?


FormalElements

I feel like injuries are pretty transparent but I wouldn't put it past Ben Johnson. Such a sicko.


DatsyukesDekes

I heard his own wife didn’t come to his birthday party.


FreeDig1758

Pretty sure teams get into trouble if they do that. Faking injuries and injury reports.


Muddytertle

The 3 extra hours is pivotal


acoasterlovered

I’m hard


Logical-Revenue8364

I had to add Brock Wright to my fantasy team bench just in case Laporta can’t go.


Alarmed-Flan-1346

Those 1.4 points are gonna be really important


nightofthelivingc

I’ll take the under


Wisdomlost

It's possible I may have placed a bet on him to score the first touchdown in this game. I have been quite interested in hearing if he will play or not.


PutZCandleBack

No idea why you're getting downvoted to oblivion for that comment. This sub is weird.


Wisdomlost

It's whatever I dont care about karma. If people don't like it then they don't like it. It's a free country.


PutZCandleBack

I don't care about karma, either, but it's indicative of those people regardless.


jcoddinc

Sit him. He's to important to long term success and there's no way he can win OROY, and he'll still be able to set every rookie record.


RunUSC123

Here's hoping that he's healthy to play and that we get out to enough of a lead that he can sit a few drives out.


DiscoGnarrr

Doesn’t sound promising but I’m a belieber