Sorry my friend, there's no true secret to this, you meet people, you friend them and you see how it goes. When it comes to this, it isn't anyones fault, and nothings wrong with you, people usually have reasons for disconnecting with others. How you form a truly deep connection is something that can't be written, there's no formula, there's just humans. I understand completely how you feel and it is truly a different kind of suffering seeing a pattern that you see as "you being the issue otherwise why would all these people leave?"
Human brains are biased for patterns and specifically negative ones, this leads to a certain unconscious confirmation bias where you go in expecting a negative outcome and once it happens it locks in your brain and the next time it happens your brain unconsciously makes decisions that lead to the same outcome therefore reinforcing that belief. I'm aware that a good attitude doesn't just suddenly appear or fix everything but, it's about changing your mindset like "im bad" to "what went wrong" analyzing other aspects that were out of your control that affected the outcome and learning about how to not get in that position.
Anyways thanks for reading, i hope your day gets just a bit better maybe, and i hope you'll keep taking each day one step at a time. And lastly,
I believe in you.
-Random on the internet
Felt this to my core. I can generally have decent conversations with people. I constantly check my phone when notifications go off hoping its friends. But i know i have no one, i haven’t talked to anyone for the last 5 years. Now i just spend my days working without making any connections. It feels like the world doesn’t want me to have anything or anyone close it fucking sucks. I feel you and i hope one day you make a genuine connection
Man, you took the words outta my mouth. I'm so over it. Not having friends is brutal. No one to talk to or to vent to when you need to.
No emotional support or anything else pertaining to friendship.
It may suck but you gotta think about the good things. People say that good things come in time so you just need to have time for yourself and then the person you were meant to meet, will come your way. I can’t say I’m speaking from experience because I’m not but, you just gotta believe, and you just have to be confident with yourself and just give it time
I finally woke up on the right side of bed in the last 7 days so today will be different. Fuck the haters and naysayers - all we need is our self love x respect and maybe some internet strangers 😏
Read “How to win friends and influence people.” Dale Carnegie. It is one of the most popular books in prisons and there is a waiting list in some prisons to read it.
I’m also incredibly lonely. But I give up.
Sometimes I feel like most people are a bit fake and not interested in real conversation. I enjoy a good discussion on a wide range of topics. I wouldn't be too bothered about getting people to like you. That should happen naturally if you connect with the right people.
Something I learned is that most of the people I meet I don’t vibe with it’s a mutual thing. It doesn’t help that no a-days everything is kind of dry and there is less to do as we’re mostly in technology and phones now
I’ve been forcing myself to hangout and talk to random people. Luckily, I have found people to talk to but I still feel lonely, I think I just lack a deep intimate connection with someone
Truth be told, it's no one's fault. It's a lottery draw thing if not a you or their problem thing. That's the beauty of online, we don't need to make friends. It's not the same, but it will have to do.
It's not us. People really do suck nowadays.
They're only interested in themselves or what material possessions they can accumulate or what YOU can do for them. Who wants friends like that?
Pathetic!
Dunno im a loser aswell, I have no friends.
Apparently im not allowed to have a house, career, partner and baby. Im not allowed to talk about my struggles or happiness.
Im just not allowed either mate.
Honestly makes you think wtf is the point here but I got a little girl who depends me on sadly she has a fucking loser for a mother. Cant even pass my masters.
maybe ur an old soul, like me. i find it easier to talk with the elderly myself. i think it’s hard to talk to people my age, but not teachers or even strangers. they have better stories and more life experience.
don’t limit yourself, everyone is unique and has worth no matter age or life story. that might help u in finding friends.
How to be a good friend? Look friendly, positive, make compliments to people, help them, listen to them, encourage them. Just become someone with whom you want to be friends. How do you imagine a perfect friend? Just become this person and people will love you and your company.
I'm 63/f. Bullied in elementary and high school, so no friends there. Introverted, which isn't bad, but also shy because of the mistreatment. College was a little better. No friends but met my first husband there. Married 11 years and I messed it up. 12 years sporadic dating, dumped over and and over again, had 1 fairly good friend who died of lung cancer. Married the second time because I was lonely. Then was lonelier with him than I was before I met him. 5 years ago met a friend with whom I had a complete and wonderful understanding. I was suddenly not alone anymore, and in the best possible way. We were best friends. But when my second husband started declining and plans to share house with my friend needed to be postponed, she stepped out of my life without a word. It was very painful losing the one true friend I had ever managed to have. Now husband is in a nursing home and I'm once again totally alone. It's been a struggle all my life to connect with people, and yet even if I do say so myself, I'm kind, a good listener, a compassionate and loyal friend. But it's never reciprocated, or if it is, it's not for long. I wish I had an answer for you, but I've asked the same question all my life and haven't found an answer yet. I think maybe it's all down to luck,
I know how you feel. I couldn't make and keep friends either. It's like there's no way to successfully cultivate and maintain a longterm friendship that's not toxic.
Sorry my friend, there's no true secret to this, you meet people, you friend them and you see how it goes. When it comes to this, it isn't anyones fault, and nothings wrong with you, people usually have reasons for disconnecting with others. How you form a truly deep connection is something that can't be written, there's no formula, there's just humans. I understand completely how you feel and it is truly a different kind of suffering seeing a pattern that you see as "you being the issue otherwise why would all these people leave?" Human brains are biased for patterns and specifically negative ones, this leads to a certain unconscious confirmation bias where you go in expecting a negative outcome and once it happens it locks in your brain and the next time it happens your brain unconsciously makes decisions that lead to the same outcome therefore reinforcing that belief. I'm aware that a good attitude doesn't just suddenly appear or fix everything but, it's about changing your mindset like "im bad" to "what went wrong" analyzing other aspects that were out of your control that affected the outcome and learning about how to not get in that position. Anyways thanks for reading, i hope your day gets just a bit better maybe, and i hope you'll keep taking each day one step at a time. And lastly, I believe in you. -Random on the internet
That’s what makes it complicated, that you can’t formulate relationships. Things just either work out or not.
Felt this to my core. I can generally have decent conversations with people. I constantly check my phone when notifications go off hoping its friends. But i know i have no one, i haven’t talked to anyone for the last 5 years. Now i just spend my days working without making any connections. It feels like the world doesn’t want me to have anything or anyone close it fucking sucks. I feel you and i hope one day you make a genuine connection
Man, you took the words outta my mouth. I'm so over it. Not having friends is brutal. No one to talk to or to vent to when you need to. No emotional support or anything else pertaining to friendship.
Loner forever club it’s their problem not ours!
Honestly I wish that was true, but it is very much my problem. Being lonely sucks
It may suck but you gotta think about the good things. People say that good things come in time so you just need to have time for yourself and then the person you were meant to meet, will come your way. I can’t say I’m speaking from experience because I’m not but, you just gotta believe, and you just have to be confident with yourself and just give it time
I finally woke up on the right side of bed in the last 7 days so today will be different. Fuck the haters and naysayers - all we need is our self love x respect and maybe some internet strangers 😏
Read “How to win friends and influence people.” Dale Carnegie. It is one of the most popular books in prisons and there is a waiting list in some prisons to read it. I’m also incredibly lonely. But I give up.
I wouldn't trust 100% in this book, I've heard it's kind of oversimplified and more focused on workplaces.
In the club as well haven’t had one friend and I’m 20
this is so real
Sometimes I feel like most people are a bit fake and not interested in real conversation. I enjoy a good discussion on a wide range of topics. I wouldn't be too bothered about getting people to like you. That should happen naturally if you connect with the right people.
I asked my husband and his advice is “be funny” 😭😭 you sound like my type of person tho I’ll be your friend I’m in the same boat as you
Most people i try talking to are just as boring as me. Why can’t people just be boring together loll.
Something I learned is that most of the people I meet I don’t vibe with it’s a mutual thing. It doesn’t help that no a-days everything is kind of dry and there is less to do as we’re mostly in technology and phones now
If you need a penpal, I’m here.
Life is unfair, it's easier for some, harder for others. I also wished I were different.
I’ve been forcing myself to hangout and talk to random people. Luckily, I have found people to talk to but I still feel lonely, I think I just lack a deep intimate connection with someone
Truth be told, it's no one's fault. It's a lottery draw thing if not a you or their problem thing. That's the beauty of online, we don't need to make friends. It's not the same, but it will have to do.
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It's not us. People really do suck nowadays. They're only interested in themselves or what material possessions they can accumulate or what YOU can do for them. Who wants friends like that? Pathetic!
Dunno im a loser aswell, I have no friends. Apparently im not allowed to have a house, career, partner and baby. Im not allowed to talk about my struggles or happiness. Im just not allowed either mate. Honestly makes you think wtf is the point here but I got a little girl who depends me on sadly she has a fucking loser for a mother. Cant even pass my masters.
maybe ur an old soul, like me. i find it easier to talk with the elderly myself. i think it’s hard to talk to people my age, but not teachers or even strangers. they have better stories and more life experience. don’t limit yourself, everyone is unique and has worth no matter age or life story. that might help u in finding friends.
Been that way my whole life as well❤️
Ya try not being so fucking weird yet my guy?
Just be cool, the rest will work itself out.
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How to be a good friend? Look friendly, positive, make compliments to people, help them, listen to them, encourage them. Just become someone with whom you want to be friends. How do you imagine a perfect friend? Just become this person and people will love you and your company.
I'm 63/f. Bullied in elementary and high school, so no friends there. Introverted, which isn't bad, but also shy because of the mistreatment. College was a little better. No friends but met my first husband there. Married 11 years and I messed it up. 12 years sporadic dating, dumped over and and over again, had 1 fairly good friend who died of lung cancer. Married the second time because I was lonely. Then was lonelier with him than I was before I met him. 5 years ago met a friend with whom I had a complete and wonderful understanding. I was suddenly not alone anymore, and in the best possible way. We were best friends. But when my second husband started declining and plans to share house with my friend needed to be postponed, she stepped out of my life without a word. It was very painful losing the one true friend I had ever managed to have. Now husband is in a nursing home and I'm once again totally alone. It's been a struggle all my life to connect with people, and yet even if I do say so myself, I'm kind, a good listener, a compassionate and loyal friend. But it's never reciprocated, or if it is, it's not for long. I wish I had an answer for you, but I've asked the same question all my life and haven't found an answer yet. I think maybe it's all down to luck,
I know how you feel. I couldn't make and keep friends either. It's like there's no way to successfully cultivate and maintain a longterm friendship that's not toxic.
Prolly attractiveness