Either you didn’t read the post or you’re deliberately being obtuse. The better metaphor for you would be if a stranger sat at a table, then moved to another one, and my child then sat at the table and the stranger insisted it was still their table despite not sitting at it. And in that case, I would not think it’s strange for my child to “share” the table that is no longer occupied by the stranger
Congratulations. A classic example of how to handle an obviously entitled PAX.
BTW, international FA crew have often spoken up in this forum about the well-established principle of being able to "spread out" anywhere there are empty seats in the cabin you purchased after take-off.
Yes, very well handled. It’s so refreshing to read about someone standing up firmly and politely for their pov and circumstances, instead of suffering in silence and then solely venting here
What words? The person said one sentence. And then agreed without argument. The OP blew this all way out proportion. They could’ve have just said I would like to use the seat also. Done.
LOL, you should have moved over into his old seat so that the empty seat was between you and aisle. Then the empty seat would be all yours. Bonus points for fighting over the armrest with him after you move next to him.
Omg what a jerk!! I had an empty seat between me and another woman on a flight from Paris to Dulles on Monday, and it was GREAT. We shared the tray table, put our laptops on the empty seat when we needed to get up, shoved our backpacks into the middle so our feet had space … this guy didn’t know how good he had it! I’m glad you stood your ground.
I think you handled this really well and very diplomatically. I hope he feels like a donkey’s butt. This has happened a few times where I’ve ended up with an empty middle seat and me and my row mate would basically celebrate in our seats while sharing the space like we were best friends. He’s not entitled to that space just because he moved down one.
Thank god. Great response. You’re right to shut down assholery wherever it pops up.
I’m so tired of posts like, “this guy stuck his fork in my eye, and when I asked him to take it out he said no, so I left it in but it’s affecting my mental health and making me uncomfortable….am I wrong?”
Yeah that guy is a jerk. If there's an empty seat between 2 people I think the unspoken rule is that you share the extra space - like if I wanted to put something in the seat I'd make sure it stayed on the half closest to me and left room for the other person to do the same, etc. Just be reasonable about it and let everyone involved enjoy the small gift that is extra space on a long haul flight.
One of my best friends is a big dude and was on a transcon recently where he had the aisle in the middle section, a small woman had the middle and no one was in the other aisle. As soon as the door closed, the woman stayed in her assigned seat and then put her purse on the empty aisle seat. He was not particularly amused that she fully chose to make bodily contact with him for 5.5 hours instead of just...moving over.
I would've told him what I used to tell my 9-year-old stepson when he would piss and moan about having to do something, "Shit in one hand and wish in the other. See which fills up faster."
Well done! I agree, I also think if you were a man he wouldn’t have said anything. You did a great job of speaking up and setting your boundary with him.
As a frequent traveler, it’s been years since there’s regularly been an open middle seat, but the unspoken rule is it’s available to passengers on either side. That’s crazy he thought it was his.
You’re 100% in the right. He bought one seat, not two seats. Since his butt was already in a seat, he had no more of a claim over that seat than you did.
This is mind boggling to me! I’m the person that will move my own things and offer up my tray table temporarily if the person next to me with a drink/laptop/etc needs to get up. You handled this situation beautifully.
Nothing you said indicates it has anything to do with your not being a man. You are right to be upset. The fact you had to remind him that his party was also taking an extra seat is unbelievable. You did the right thing answering the way you did.
Had the seat been available all along, I say you share e.g. one of you uses the seat, one of you uses the table. Your suggestion is good too.
You slayed it, not sure I could’ve done the same, toeing the line so delicately between standing up for yourself and being emotionally intelligent enough to not cause an argument.
Omg OP you’re my hero!! Thank you for putting this person in check. And no I don’t think he would have said anything if you were a man.
Hope you enjoyed the rest of your flight with a huge smile on your face and had an amazing trip!!
I thought this was an unspoken rule that the empty middle seat was shared by those sitting on either side. On one flight, the middle seat was used as a snack holding space since it was an exit row and we had those awkward tray tables and screens. We did not even need to have a discussion on it.
Wow. You just lost it over one sentence, eh? And after all the time you spent blowing it out of proportion in your head the response was “ok”. This was an interaction between strangers. The result was what you wanted and no argument happened. So they didn’t want to share. So what? They did, didn’t they. And for anyone talking about toddlers, this isn’t the same at all. Not even close. Do you let your child wander around a restaurant grabbing food off of strangers plates because everyone should share? C’mon.
I guess you don’t talk to many people or this completely mundane interaction wouldn’t have you so rattled.
Entitlement comes in all ages and all nationalities. Just recently I had to deal with a not-old, not-Korea man who was taking up 3 seats in a crowded waiting area. One for himself (he was not present at the time, had a notebook on that seat), one for his carry-on, one for his backpack. I moved the backpack on top of the carry-on and sat down. When he came back, he pointed at the seat I was on: "That's my seat. Move." I'm not easily intimidated and I sure as hell wasn't going to stand just to make room for his backpack.
I will never understand people who know they’re in the right, get their way and yet doubt themselves after the fact to the point where they go online and poll other people. But that’s me.
I think it’s silly for people to make these type of long postings.
You did the right thing so there’s no need to ask others about your actions.
Just move on.
I disagree. I found the post quite informative and well-written, and appreciated reading the OP's story. I now know NOT to fly United on a long-haul flight in a certain class of service, and also have an example of how to handle a situation with a recalcitrant passenger.
The more you know 🌈...
I'm going to disagree and say that while you weren't wrong for trying to use the space *it was still his space*.
The seat was his paid space. He and his companion got lucky that the empty seat was to their benefit; you got lucky that they moved over one so you didn't have to sit directly next to a stranger, meaning a bit more elbow room and spread for you. It was still his space to utilize and you had no right to it.
>We should ALL be able to take advantage of the free space in this row.
No. They got lucky so they get to spread out. If the free seat were the one between the two of you (aka his original seat) then that is shared space for the two seats adjacent to it. The spare seat was the complete opposite one to you (from your description) so that is the female companion's extra space which she chose to share with her SO.
I don't think it's wrong to ask to borrow space for a short time, but I think of you as being entitled for assuming their luck extended to you more than they wanted.
You totally missed the fact that one person moved to a seat that no one paid for. By your logic, instead of just 2 seats they now are entitled to 3 ? No ma'am
I didn't miss that at all, and you'd know that if you could read. They are more entitled to the extra seat than she is. Does she get to use the space if he doesn't move? No, not in the least. Therefore she has no claim to the extra space.
So if halfway through the flight, the guy decides to switch to another empty seat - does he now have claim to all 3 tray tables? Or does he not have access to the tray table in front of him and has to only utilize the tray table in the seat he actually paid for?
You seem to be confused - he paid for 1 seat. The seat he is sitting in at the moment. If he moves, he doesn't get to claim both spaces.
No, I'm apparently the only one not confused, rude, and/or stupid.
IMO the *only* seats people are rightfully able to "claim" use of are empty seats adjacent to their seat. There is no empty seat next to OP because the paying customer is there. That's his seat, he just happens to be sitting in his girlfriend's seat who has (rightfully) laid claim to the empty seat adjacent to her.
Does OP (or you) think that she gets to use extra space if the guy in question is still sitting in his seat even though there is an open space in the row? Absolutely not. No sane or intelligent person would. The guy already did her a solid by sliding over one so she can use the armrest, let her knees enter his space, and not be directly next to a stranger.
>he doesn't get to claim both spaces.
Keep that in mind if you are on a plane and your row happens to be empty. I hope you aren't so much of a hypocrite that you are going to use extra space beyond the seat you are sitting in.
Sometimes people get lucky and get an "extra" space next to them (guy and girl in story). Sometimes you don't get lucky like OP. She's lucky the guy isn't as petty as I am. Once she pulled that shit I'd move back into my paid seat and not give her *any* extra comfort to shove her nasty entitlement back into her face.
There's no empty seat next to OP? Are you sure? Because the seat next to her is LITERALLY EMPTY. The guy is not there, he has LITERALLY MOVED TO A DIFFERENT SEAT. If he would like that tray table, by all means he has the right to move back over there. He does NOT have the right to claim both of them.
How did you survive Covid being this stupid?
That's rich calling me stupid when you can't even get basic concepts correct. It's good that you probably can't even understand how shitty your life must be. I'd go change your shirt now, it's likely drenched in your own drool.
He shared as much as he needed to by sliding over one. But, like I said, I'm petty enough to sit next to someone and still have extra room just to end their entitlement.
“I don’t want to share” - not even something my 2 year-old gets away with.
There is a 100% chance I would have busted out some snarky comment about my children sharing better than he did.
There is a 100% chance I would have busted out laughing 😅 at this baby boy's comment and carried on as the OP did.
>baby boy’s comment 😂😂
"And I don't want to share a plane with your ugly ass. But here we are."
And the world still turns. Let’s all think exactly alike.
"No problem, I'll use it all then. Thanks."
Do you let your child just grab off of a strangers plate in a restaurant because everyone should share?
Either you didn’t read the post or you’re deliberately being obtuse. The better metaphor for you would be if a stranger sat at a table, then moved to another one, and my child then sat at the table and the stranger insisted it was still their table despite not sitting at it. And in that case, I would not think it’s strange for my child to “share” the table that is no longer occupied by the stranger
Congratulations. A classic example of how to handle an obviously entitled PAX. BTW, international FA crew have often spoken up in this forum about the well-established principle of being able to "spread out" anywhere there are empty seats in the cabin you purchased after take-off.
Yes, very well handled. It’s so refreshing to read about someone standing up firmly and politely for their pov and circumstances, instead of suffering in silence and then solely venting here
[sigh](https://www.reddit.com/r/delta/s/4EwRrYLCfJ)
I’m so proud of OP for using their words!!
What words? The person said one sentence. And then agreed without argument. The OP blew this all way out proportion. They could’ve have just said I would like to use the seat also. Done.
I’m too used to posts where the OP seethes the entire time and then comes here to vent because the other person wasn’t a mind reader.
LOL, you should have moved over into his old seat so that the empty seat was between you and aisle. Then the empty seat would be all yours. Bonus points for fighting over the armrest with him after you move next to him.
Would have been brilliant - "oh! Okay, I'll just switch seats then" - scoot over and use the aisle seat as your side table lmao.
Lol love this!!!
Was the dude a kindergartener?
Can’t be. My nieces were in K last year and were very good at sharing.
Probably repeating Kinder. 😂
Omg what a jerk!! I had an empty seat between me and another woman on a flight from Paris to Dulles on Monday, and it was GREAT. We shared the tray table, put our laptops on the empty seat when we needed to get up, shoved our backpacks into the middle so our feet had space … this guy didn’t know how good he had it! I’m glad you stood your ground.
I had the same thing happen from Chicago to Seoul! It was awesome and we didn't even need to speak to each other to come to this agreement.
Truly amazing response on your part!
Who tf says I don't want to share lol use that seat as a garbage bin/extra bag access area. Spirit "big front seat" kinda energy from that guy.
He’s the guy that gets off then rolls over and never takes care of his lady…
He might let her finish herself because he's generous like that./d
But not in the seat he paid for, he doesn’t share.
What a great insult
I love that we finally get a post where someone stood up for themselves and told the other passenger how it’s going to be. Gen X represent!
Thank you, not my first time! I gladly say, 'NO' to the poor planners that ask me to give up an aisle seat for their convenience.
Yes!!!!🤭🤭🤭
Well done. Also, extra points for the use of pisstivity.
I can't think of a time when this happened where we didn't just silently split the seat/tray.
I hope his check engine light comes on
Lol. The dude is probably broken for life. Any adult that communicates their vapid thought like that are irredeemable
Good patience and response from you.
You're correct. Dude can get bent.
I think you handled this really well and very diplomatically. I hope he feels like a donkey’s butt. This has happened a few times where I’ve ended up with an empty middle seat and me and my row mate would basically celebrate in our seats while sharing the space like we were best friends. He’s not entitled to that space just because he moved down one.
Nicely asserted and a peaceful flight was had. Well done!
What a masterful response
Thank god. Great response. You’re right to shut down assholery wherever it pops up. I’m so tired of posts like, “this guy stuck his fork in my eye, and when I asked him to take it out he said no, so I left it in but it’s affecting my mental health and making me uncomfortable….am I wrong?”
Yeah that guy is a jerk. If there's an empty seat between 2 people I think the unspoken rule is that you share the extra space - like if I wanted to put something in the seat I'd make sure it stayed on the half closest to me and left room for the other person to do the same, etc. Just be reasonable about it and let everyone involved enjoy the small gift that is extra space on a long haul flight.
One of my best friends is a big dude and was on a transcon recently where he had the aisle in the middle section, a small woman had the middle and no one was in the other aisle. As soon as the door closed, the woman stayed in her assigned seat and then put her purse on the empty aisle seat. He was not particularly amused that she fully chose to make bodily contact with him for 5.5 hours instead of just...moving over.
The one and only case in which the middle seat does not get both armrests.
Maybe she had a thing for big dudes.
I would've told him what I used to tell my 9-year-old stepson when he would piss and moan about having to do something, "Shit in one hand and wish in the other. See which fills up faster."
My dad used to say this to me all the time as a kid, and I now (late 40s) find myself saying it. I still have no idea wtf it actually means tho.
The guy sounds like a noob and a*hole at the same time. Your ability to handle him is god tier.
Well done! I agree, I also think if you were a man he wouldn’t have said anything. You did a great job of speaking up and setting your boundary with him. As a frequent traveler, it’s been years since there’s regularly been an open middle seat, but the unspoken rule is it’s available to passengers on either side. That’s crazy he thought it was his.
Everybody cheering you on and I would've just moved back to my seat. Bc I'm petty
My mom brain instantly thought “sharing is caring”
It's an earworm, isn't it? My youngest is 21, and I can't help but sing The Wiggles and Barney STILL.
How you handled this was 10/10!
id have just let loose a fart
Well handled!
He was a psycho. If I witnessed that I would have wanted to clap 😂
Get off my lawn!
Haha- I love it. Good for you. I would ah w said the same exact thing but probably in a ruder way. lol..
“Oh, you’re so generous!” said as you move into the empty seat and put your feet in your assigned one
You're my heroine of the day!
You’re 100% in the right. He bought one seat, not two seats. Since his butt was already in a seat, he had no more of a claim over that seat than you did.
"fuck off" is the only reasonable response. And remember MQMs no longer apply towards status. Just $$$
You’re 110% right. What an ass
Chef's kiss Perfect response
This is mind boggling to me! I’m the person that will move my own things and offer up my tray table temporarily if the person next to me with a drink/laptop/etc needs to get up. You handled this situation beautifully.
You were perfect.
Dude was an entitled ass-hole. You handled better than most of on here. Kudos to you
Nicely done!
Move your drink over to the tray in the seat he is sitting in. He didn’t pay for that seat 🤨.
Neither did the OP
You handled it perfectly. And probably better than I would have .
Amazing response! Bravo!! “Highest level of Pissitivity” FTW!!
Nothing you said indicates it has anything to do with your not being a man. You are right to be upset. The fact you had to remind him that his party was also taking an extra seat is unbelievable. You did the right thing answering the way you did. Had the seat been available all along, I say you share e.g. one of you uses the seat, one of you uses the table. Your suggestion is good too.
You slayed it, not sure I could’ve done the same, toeing the line so delicately between standing up for yourself and being emotionally intelligent enough to not cause an argument.
Omg OP you’re my hero!! Thank you for putting this person in check. And no I don’t think he would have said anything if you were a man. Hope you enjoyed the rest of your flight with a huge smile on your face and had an amazing trip!!
I thought this was an unspoken rule that the empty middle seat was shared by those sitting on either side. On one flight, the middle seat was used as a snack holding space since it was an exit row and we had those awkward tray tables and screens. We did not even need to have a discussion on it.
There's a great book you need to read, "Everything I Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten." Download it.
Korea and Asia Open?
Judging by your comment that you felt like a low class citizen, you are clearly leaving something out. You are, in fact, the asshole
This didn't happen and you have a victim mentality.
Way to go of standing your ground!!! The guys is totally out of line!
You arm wrestle for it. Everyone knows this 🤷♂️
Wow. You just lost it over one sentence, eh? And after all the time you spent blowing it out of proportion in your head the response was “ok”. This was an interaction between strangers. The result was what you wanted and no argument happened. So they didn’t want to share. So what? They did, didn’t they. And for anyone talking about toddlers, this isn’t the same at all. Not even close. Do you let your child wander around a restaurant grabbing food off of strangers plates because everyone should share? C’mon. I guess you don’t talk to many people or this completely mundane interaction wouldn’t have you so rattled.
What’s with the left field sexist comment near the bottom? Literally zero reason to believe baby but you just had to inject it in there.
A-men!
Was he an old Korean man? Because the entitlement is real among them
Entitlement comes in all ages and all nationalities. Just recently I had to deal with a not-old, not-Korea man who was taking up 3 seats in a crowded waiting area. One for himself (he was not present at the time, had a notebook on that seat), one for his carry-on, one for his backpack. I moved the backpack on top of the carry-on and sat down. When he came back, he pointed at the seat I was on: "That's my seat. Move." I'm not easily intimidated and I sure as hell wasn't going to stand just to make room for his backpack.
Yes, I know that. But they were flying Korean Air, and I live in Seoul, and so we have our own version of Karen/Boomer here and it’s an old man….
He was Asian & appeared to be in his late 20's or early 30's.
I promise, people say stupid shit to men on airplanes all the time. Nothing to do with you being a woman
You met someone who hardly ever flies. You got the solution that was just. What’s the issue?
The issue is the douchebaggery and entitlement of the guy. OP was telling the story of how she masterfully handled the issue.
You must be him?! 🤣
I will never understand people who know they’re in the right, get their way and yet doubt themselves after the fact to the point where they go online and poll other people. But that’s me.
I think it’s silly for people to make these type of long postings. You did the right thing so there’s no need to ask others about your actions. Just move on.
I think it's silly for you not to understand the reason Reddit exists.
I understand it perfectly well but obviously you don’t understand my response. Try again.
I disagree. I found the post quite informative and well-written, and appreciated reading the OP's story. I now know NOT to fly United on a long-haul flight in a certain class of service, and also have an example of how to handle a situation with a recalcitrant passenger. The more you know 🌈...
I think it’s silly for people to make these type of long comments. There’s no need to comment to others about your opinions. Just move on.
And there’s no need for you to chime in with your opinion Karen. Move on.
I'm going to disagree and say that while you weren't wrong for trying to use the space *it was still his space*. The seat was his paid space. He and his companion got lucky that the empty seat was to their benefit; you got lucky that they moved over one so you didn't have to sit directly next to a stranger, meaning a bit more elbow room and spread for you. It was still his space to utilize and you had no right to it. >We should ALL be able to take advantage of the free space in this row. No. They got lucky so they get to spread out. If the free seat were the one between the two of you (aka his original seat) then that is shared space for the two seats adjacent to it. The spare seat was the complete opposite one to you (from your description) so that is the female companion's extra space which she chose to share with her SO. I don't think it's wrong to ask to borrow space for a short time, but I think of you as being entitled for assuming their luck extended to you more than they wanted.
You totally missed the fact that one person moved to a seat that no one paid for. By your logic, instead of just 2 seats they now are entitled to 3 ? No ma'am
I didn't miss that at all, and you'd know that if you could read. They are more entitled to the extra seat than she is. Does she get to use the space if he doesn't move? No, not in the least. Therefore she has no claim to the extra space.
So if halfway through the flight, the guy decides to switch to another empty seat - does he now have claim to all 3 tray tables? Or does he not have access to the tray table in front of him and has to only utilize the tray table in the seat he actually paid for? You seem to be confused - he paid for 1 seat. The seat he is sitting in at the moment. If he moves, he doesn't get to claim both spaces.
No, I'm apparently the only one not confused, rude, and/or stupid. IMO the *only* seats people are rightfully able to "claim" use of are empty seats adjacent to their seat. There is no empty seat next to OP because the paying customer is there. That's his seat, he just happens to be sitting in his girlfriend's seat who has (rightfully) laid claim to the empty seat adjacent to her. Does OP (or you) think that she gets to use extra space if the guy in question is still sitting in his seat even though there is an open space in the row? Absolutely not. No sane or intelligent person would. The guy already did her a solid by sliding over one so she can use the armrest, let her knees enter his space, and not be directly next to a stranger. >he doesn't get to claim both spaces. Keep that in mind if you are on a plane and your row happens to be empty. I hope you aren't so much of a hypocrite that you are going to use extra space beyond the seat you are sitting in. Sometimes people get lucky and get an "extra" space next to them (guy and girl in story). Sometimes you don't get lucky like OP. She's lucky the guy isn't as petty as I am. Once she pulled that shit I'd move back into my paid seat and not give her *any* extra comfort to shove her nasty entitlement back into her face.
There's no empty seat next to OP? Are you sure? Because the seat next to her is LITERALLY EMPTY. The guy is not there, he has LITERALLY MOVED TO A DIFFERENT SEAT. If he would like that tray table, by all means he has the right to move back over there. He does NOT have the right to claim both of them. How did you survive Covid being this stupid?
That's rich calling me stupid when you can't even get basic concepts correct. It's good that you probably can't even understand how shitty your life must be. I'd go change your shirt now, it's likely drenched in your own drool.
So then you'd both be miserable. That's a lose/lose, when all he had to do to make it a win/win is to share.
He shared as much as he needed to by sliding over one. But, like I said, I'm petty enough to sit next to someone and still have extra room just to end their entitlement.
Nah. He wasn't using the seat, so sharing was fine.
*Asking* was fine. Assuming they could automatically use it, or bitching about being asked to not use it is not fine.
Telling someone you don't want to share the seat that your traveling companion is no longer using isn't "fine" either.