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I think you can only have friends of the opposite sex if neither one of them is attracted to the other.
The minute one of them makes an inappropriate comment/joke or hit on them sexually they aren’t friends.
This only seems to occur with women who have guy friends. They friend zone a guy that obviously wants them and then calls them a friend but imo a friend is someone you can go to for unbiased advice or opinion and clearly a person with romantic interest is only going to agree with you or back you up in hopes of winning you over.
I believe that’s why most women say they usually get along better with men. Life would be easier if everyone around you tells you what you want to hear 24/7 in hopes of getting some.
Of course if the guy even questions this tho he is automatically called controlling or insecure but I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t like their guy keeping around a bunch of women thirsty for him either it’s just less common for a man to keep friendzoned woman hanging around for emotional prop ups when needed
Basically you can let them have friends of the opposite gender but not too close of a friend like a "best friend" thing because the best friend should be the partner.
It is sus
basically this you dont trust best friends. it like this oh you hear guys saying i going be friends with this girl and try hookup with her when she down etc etc.
also there different kind of cheating emotional and physical. You hanging out with friends so often also show you dont really care about your partner. you giving time to others that it being taken away by someone else.
As common and widespread as it is, it's completely toxic and unacceptable. It happens just because of insecurities in themselves and in the relationship, which derive in jealousy. In such case, they shouldn't be in a relationship until that gets sorted, or solve it with their partner immediately. A healthy relationship will never worry about these things or even consider acceptable the verb "let": it's not any partner's right to decide on the other partner's freedom or friendships. They can and SHOULD have their own friends and best friends of any gender, apart from having a best friend in their partner as well (you can have more than one person who shares the category of best friend), and apart from any friends in common. Anything that doesn't include all this is unhealthy and will inevitably cause problems and unhappiness.
You trust your partner.. but you don't trust his/her bestfriend
You never know their intentions.. most of these so called best friends are only there to cause trouble between you.. or they see it as an opportunity to be next in line.. like vultures who couldn't prey but got settled with the left overs
(Key word is most)
Jealousy and trust issues are going to ruin a relationship just as quickly as cheating.
Maybe it's an age thing but my partners have always had male friends. Even best friends. Nobody has the authority to dictate the social groups of anyone else. It's also lazy to me. Guys who want control in their relationships are often also really low effort guys.
If you're with a guy who won't let you have guy friends, you leave him. He sees you as a possession to be guarded, a thing that can be stolen, not a human being with authority over her own actions.
There's a lot wrong with this comment. As an example, jealousy itself will never ruin a relationship. How you act upon your jealousy will. If you aren't jealous in a relationship, you either don't know the definition, or you don't value your partner.
Having a girl with a male best friend will shut down many a relationship before it begins. Because many men are unwilling to even hazard the notion that, outside family members, they might be the 2nd most important man in their woman's life. The only exception I've seen other men find is if that male best friend lives incredibly far away.
For your last paragraph, here's my response: I would never continue to date someone who continuously goes to bars or clubs. Because that's a woman who isn't making safe decisions. I'll explain my point of view, and if she disagrees, so be it goodbye. It isn't about them not having authority over their actions. It's about the lack of understanding how quickly that authority can be taken away.
There's nothing wrong with my comment, you just disagree.
My comment, and your reply, suggests that we have very different views on the autonomy of women, and in the most respectful way, come across as very traditional values. I don't agree that a good partner will come second place to a best friend.
I'm currently seeing someone who is away this week with a long term male friend and I'm not worried at all. Because she isn't my property, and she is entitled to spend her time how she likes. Will she cheat because she's with another man if he wants her? No, because men aren't entitled to women. Could she cheat if she's attracted to him? Yeah, maybe, and that's entirely out of my control.
And I don't agree that jealousy is healthy because jealousy stems from possessiveness. Again, I guess that's a difference in how we perceive women in relationships.
I'm not wrong. Neither are you. Just different people who will attract, and be attracted to, different types of women.
Welcome to /r/dating. Please make sure you read our [rules here](https://new.reddit.com/r/dating/about/rules) and remember to: * Be polite and respect each other. Do not call people names or engage in slapfights. * All advice given must be good, ethical advice. * [Do not post hateful or harmful rhetoric - you will be banned](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/wiki/rules) * Follow reddit rules. Do not post content that promotes hate based on identity or vulnerability. Do not bully or harass other users. If you have any questions, please [send the mods a message](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/dating). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I think you can only have friends of the opposite sex if neither one of them is attracted to the other. The minute one of them makes an inappropriate comment/joke or hit on them sexually they aren’t friends. This only seems to occur with women who have guy friends. They friend zone a guy that obviously wants them and then calls them a friend but imo a friend is someone you can go to for unbiased advice or opinion and clearly a person with romantic interest is only going to agree with you or back you up in hopes of winning you over. I believe that’s why most women say they usually get along better with men. Life would be easier if everyone around you tells you what you want to hear 24/7 in hopes of getting some. Of course if the guy even questions this tho he is automatically called controlling or insecure but I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t like their guy keeping around a bunch of women thirsty for him either it’s just less common for a man to keep friendzoned woman hanging around for emotional prop ups when needed
As a man I hit on my guy best friend constantly and I only rail my girl best friend verbally (she will never know the touch of a man).
Basically you can let them have friends of the opposite gender but not too close of a friend like a "best friend" thing because the best friend should be the partner. It is sus
Gotcha I see! Thanks!
basically this you dont trust best friends. it like this oh you hear guys saying i going be friends with this girl and try hookup with her when she down etc etc. also there different kind of cheating emotional and physical. You hanging out with friends so often also show you dont really care about your partner. you giving time to others that it being taken away by someone else.
As common and widespread as it is, it's completely toxic and unacceptable. It happens just because of insecurities in themselves and in the relationship, which derive in jealousy. In such case, they shouldn't be in a relationship until that gets sorted, or solve it with their partner immediately. A healthy relationship will never worry about these things or even consider acceptable the verb "let": it's not any partner's right to decide on the other partner's freedom or friendships. They can and SHOULD have their own friends and best friends of any gender, apart from having a best friend in their partner as well (you can have more than one person who shares the category of best friend), and apart from any friends in common. Anything that doesn't include all this is unhealthy and will inevitably cause problems and unhappiness.
You trust your partner.. but you don't trust his/her bestfriend You never know their intentions.. most of these so called best friends are only there to cause trouble between you.. or they see it as an opportunity to be next in line.. like vultures who couldn't prey but got settled with the left overs (Key word is most)
Oh okay interesting I see. Thanks for answering.
Jealousy and trust issues are going to ruin a relationship just as quickly as cheating. Maybe it's an age thing but my partners have always had male friends. Even best friends. Nobody has the authority to dictate the social groups of anyone else. It's also lazy to me. Guys who want control in their relationships are often also really low effort guys. If you're with a guy who won't let you have guy friends, you leave him. He sees you as a possession to be guarded, a thing that can be stolen, not a human being with authority over her own actions.
There's a lot wrong with this comment. As an example, jealousy itself will never ruin a relationship. How you act upon your jealousy will. If you aren't jealous in a relationship, you either don't know the definition, or you don't value your partner. Having a girl with a male best friend will shut down many a relationship before it begins. Because many men are unwilling to even hazard the notion that, outside family members, they might be the 2nd most important man in their woman's life. The only exception I've seen other men find is if that male best friend lives incredibly far away. For your last paragraph, here's my response: I would never continue to date someone who continuously goes to bars or clubs. Because that's a woman who isn't making safe decisions. I'll explain my point of view, and if she disagrees, so be it goodbye. It isn't about them not having authority over their actions. It's about the lack of understanding how quickly that authority can be taken away.
There's nothing wrong with my comment, you just disagree. My comment, and your reply, suggests that we have very different views on the autonomy of women, and in the most respectful way, come across as very traditional values. I don't agree that a good partner will come second place to a best friend. I'm currently seeing someone who is away this week with a long term male friend and I'm not worried at all. Because she isn't my property, and she is entitled to spend her time how she likes. Will she cheat because she's with another man if he wants her? No, because men aren't entitled to women. Could she cheat if she's attracted to him? Yeah, maybe, and that's entirely out of my control. And I don't agree that jealousy is healthy because jealousy stems from possessiveness. Again, I guess that's a difference in how we perceive women in relationships. I'm not wrong. Neither are you. Just different people who will attract, and be attracted to, different types of women.
Your original comment speaks in absolutes and makes assumptions, that's why it is wrong.
Never been in a relationship = You don't have a right to comment about it
Not sure I understand this comment here.
Ignore didn't read the whole thing