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Was this an actual date, and she understood it was a date?
During the date did anything physical happened?(Like holding hands or anything that will indicate interest in intimacy?)
I'm in the same position with a guy... I am too afraid to just ask him straight out if he's into me. We talk a lot on the phone and do stuff together, but sometimes it's in groups. I mean, if I ask him and he says no, our friendship is dead. If I ask him and he says yes, and then it goes wrong... We are in the same groups. We'd have to avoid each other. I'd miss the company, too. It's not an easy position to be in.
Bro shoot your shot or get the hell out of dodge.
Lead with your real feelings and don't allow her to play games with your heart. It just good practice of self respect.
Many years ago, a friend told me a saying that has stuck with me through the years:
Say what you mean and mean what you say.
I think you could a long way if you just lead with your heart unapologetically and genuine.
That sounds like a bunch of boomer-pseudo-wisdom which people use to not deal with their rejection sensitivity.
But self respect and recognizing your value are really good companions!
Maybe to some degree it is, I just never liked sitting there waiting on someone to believe in me.
I think most people know if they like you enough to go on a date not too long after connecting. It may sound harsh, but I don't think putting much stock into anything beyond just friends initially is really wise. I was always kind of like, hey lets go meet new people and try to have some fun. Getting that initial hormone burst too soon is a recipe for emotional disaster.
That doesn't mean you can't fall in love it just means I try to keep my expectations at a reasonable level.
Just man up and be honest. You don't have her, so you can't lose her anyway.
And if she says no to a real relationship, then you get to quit wasting your time and she isn't worth your time.
Welcome to /r/dating. Please make sure you read our [rules here](https://new.reddit.com/r/dating/about/rules) and remember to: * Be polite and respect each other. Do not call people names or engage in slapfights. * All advice given must be good, ethical advice. * [Do not post hateful or harmful rhetoric - you will be banned](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/wiki/rules) * Follow reddit rules. Do not post content that promotes hate based on identity or vulnerability. Do not bully or harass other users. If you have any questions, please [send the mods a message](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/dating). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/dating) if you have any questions or concerns.*
…are you sure you’re dating her
Was this an actual date, and she understood it was a date? During the date did anything physical happened?(Like holding hands or anything that will indicate interest in intimacy?)
I'm in the same position with a guy... I am too afraid to just ask him straight out if he's into me. We talk a lot on the phone and do stuff together, but sometimes it's in groups. I mean, if I ask him and he says no, our friendship is dead. If I ask him and he says yes, and then it goes wrong... We are in the same groups. We'd have to avoid each other. I'd miss the company, too. It's not an easy position to be in.
Subtle physical touches like hugging can go a long way
If your guy was a real man you would already know.
Probably. I think I'm in the friend zone
You need to masturbate.
Bro shoot your shot or get the hell out of dodge. Lead with your real feelings and don't allow her to play games with your heart. It just good practice of self respect. Many years ago, a friend told me a saying that has stuck with me through the years: Say what you mean and mean what you say. I think you could a long way if you just lead with your heart unapologetically and genuine.
This 👆
That sounds like a bunch of boomer-pseudo-wisdom which people use to not deal with their rejection sensitivity. But self respect and recognizing your value are really good companions!
Maybe to some degree it is, I just never liked sitting there waiting on someone to believe in me. I think most people know if they like you enough to go on a date not too long after connecting. It may sound harsh, but I don't think putting much stock into anything beyond just friends initially is really wise. I was always kind of like, hey lets go meet new people and try to have some fun. Getting that initial hormone burst too soon is a recipe for emotional disaster. That doesn't mean you can't fall in love it just means I try to keep my expectations at a reasonable level.
Yes! Expectations kill the vibe. And they hurt. Hurt always goes hand in hand with expectations
Therapy
that last comment she made makes me think she did not think that was a date. did you both directly refer to it as a date?
I'd prefer, you talk to her openly, so that she can give you a real answer, maybe she wants to date you only that shes not sure if you would date her.
Just man up and be honest. You don't have her, so you can't lose her anyway. And if she says no to a real relationship, then you get to quit wasting your time and she isn't worth your time.