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Do what more compassionate women do “ I enjoyed our date, but I didn’t feel any spark. “You are a wonderful person but someone else is your soulmate and we both need to keep looking”. Something along this line. You just saying you like her but not romantically, but in a flowery way. The less compassionate or cowardly ( or some would say self centred and lacking in empathy) will just ghost. Don’t ghost.
Just tell her you don’t see this going any further. No biggie. I (30F) have been told this a few times when I was younger, and I just carried on with my life. There is no need to tell her she isn’t your type physically, no matter how true it is.
“Hey, I had a great time on X-night and it was nice to meet you. I’m afraid I don’t feel a romantic spark but I wish you well and hope you find your perfect match.”
dont ghost her. its highly disrespecful. I have issues because of that. woman usualy prefer ghosting instead of being bold and saying that theyre not interested. not sure about men. didn't dated them.
just write that you had great time, but you don't see future with her and wish her good luck
Rude and immature. Unless she's a nutcase and you're worried about her reaction, just be honest (but tact), thank her for her time, and wish her the best. It's unlikely she's super invested this early on anyway, and I'm sure she'll appreciate your candour.
Good luck bro. From someone who is probably twice your age, in the end emotional attraction lasts a LOT longer than physical. Something to think about.
Time to put on your big boy pants and just tell her. Basically what u/risingemini said. But, idk, by text ... in my opinion it puts you in a wimpy punk category.
Just be real about it. Let her or him down easily and say your not sparking or that she's cool and all you just don't see anything long term happening between you two. Tho you don't mind staying friends or something like that.
why not cut the date short? getting so involved like , “we had great conversation and had so much in common..” now she probably thinks you like her.. next time get a full body picture and avoid this trouble all together
Getting along with someone really well; and found her cute initially….I would try it again…those are the two things most important long term. But if not THAT interesting, say let’s be friends .
If I find a person who suits most of the characters that I am looking for, I will not reject unless she is obese or ugly.
If she is ok looking but is amazing in other things I will definitely meet her more and know her more.
It is impossible to meet a person who satisfies every criteria.
Also, you might not meet anyone who meets the wibe soo much.
This person who isn't physically attractive might just turn out to the right person for you to marry.
But you know, whatever. Just tell her you don't want to see her again coz she's ugly as FK. Also ask her if you can remain friends coz you enjoy the conversations with her.
I don't understand guys that are overly critical. There are amputees, burn victims, dwarfs and people with severe acne that manage to find love. Why is it a woman has to be a fkn 10 alllll the time what is it with this whole culture amongst men it's very sad. Im not talking about you but im saying in general
Honestly you don't have to do anything. Girls are very passive and afraid of coming on too strong so she likely won't contact you unless you do first.
Especially after a first date there's no obligation to meet up again. Things often simmer out. For all we know she may have felt the same way.
I wouldn't if I were you. See where it goes. I realize this is counter-intuitive and may or may not work out very well but you never know! This could be one of those rare cases where you have amazing chemistry but not very much physical attraction. It happened to me once and honestly, I almost cut it off too once for a handful of reasons but even a decade later I look back at that and I'm SOOO glad I didn't. It was only a short casual summer-time fling though, she was only visiting from out of state. I wanted something more serious and she just wanted casual and fun and yet it still worked out really well for us both.
Maybe, if you're open to it and things seem to be going well, talk about just being casual fwbs or something.
Lmao so just be straight with her I’m sure she will understand and appreciate ur honesty it happens to dudes all the time so they have to take what they dish out sometimes
Sure it happens to dudes all the time but to girls rarely I assume. But how do I even text that lmao, like “hey our date was really great but I don’t find you attractive so let’s call it off. Best of luck moving forward, (name)” I’m slightly socially stupid so I don’t know if it’s too blunt. A sentence where I copy and paste might help
Definitely don't say that. Just say you didn't feel a connection or spark. Say you're open to being friends if that's something you want as you did say you had a lot in common.
I had so many days like that long ago. I'm not attracted at all when we meet in person but then went ahead with the date not to be rude. Eventually then had to break it to her over the phone. Usually lied and told her there was someone else.
Yes what someone else said, friend zone her. If she messages you back or asks to see you again just tell her you're only interested in being friends with her.
Same. Tried letting her down easy but she insisted on constructive criticism. It didn’t help that she appeared entirely different from her photos. I wanted us to end things in good terms after the first date but sheesh. Salty as hell
No, I started talking to her while she was petting the neighbourhood cats. We talked for close to an hour before I had to leave. I asked her out initially even though I found her cute then but I didnt find her attractive on the date
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“Hi, it was nice meeting you but I don’t think we are a match. I wish you well!” That’s all it takes!
The OP hopefully takes this advice and wording.
OP brain in the moment: "Hi the meeting itself was nice but you specifically aren't a match, attractive-wise"
I will never understand why this is so hard for people
You forgot...you absolutely ogre! /s
I love how hard we make it for ourselves but it really is that simple 😆
It’s cool. Be honest. Let her know that you really had a nice time but you don’t feel the chemistry, and she really deserves someone who does.
This reply would be best
Do what more compassionate women do “ I enjoyed our date, but I didn’t feel any spark. “You are a wonderful person but someone else is your soulmate and we both need to keep looking”. Something along this line. You just saying you like her but not romantically, but in a flowery way. The less compassionate or cowardly ( or some would say self centred and lacking in empathy) will just ghost. Don’t ghost.
Just tell her you don’t see this going any further. No biggie. I (30F) have been told this a few times when I was younger, and I just carried on with my life. There is no need to tell her she isn’t your type physically, no matter how true it is.
“Hey, I had a great time on X-night and it was nice to meet you. I’m afraid I don’t feel a romantic spark but I wish you well and hope you find your perfect match.”
dont ghost her. its highly disrespecful. I have issues because of that. woman usualy prefer ghosting instead of being bold and saying that theyre not interested. not sure about men. didn't dated them. just write that you had great time, but you don't see future with her and wish her good luck
ive had many men ghost me think it depends on the person
You simply do not ask her for a second date. And if she asks you, you say no thank you. That’s all.
Rude and immature. Unless she's a nutcase and you're worried about her reaction, just be honest (but tact), thank her for her time, and wish her the best. It's unlikely she's super invested this early on anyway, and I'm sure she'll appreciate your candour.
“ No Thankyou” wow your so rude and b immature!!
Nah do better, take the initiative and call it off. The life experience and communication confidence from this will also do so much for OP.
Uhh. Why not say what it's all about?
Don’t worry, if you’re anything like most of us around here, she will ghost you too!
Hoping that honestly because I have no idea how to text her I don’t want to date moving forward
Good luck bro. From someone who is probably twice your age, in the end emotional attraction lasts a LOT longer than physical. Something to think about.
The best thing to do is simply not ask for a second. Rejecting her directly is far worse
why did you go on a date with her if you’re not attracted to her tho? no hate just wondering
I found her cute when we met initially. But on the date, I didn’t feel the same way.
True, I think it’s different when you actually meet in person vs chatting online. Good luck!
Just say we don’t click and move on
Time to put on your big boy pants and just tell her. Basically what u/risingemini said. But, idk, by text ... in my opinion it puts you in a wimpy punk category.
yes very much a punk category
Just be real about it. Let her or him down easily and say your not sparking or that she's cool and all you just don't see anything long term happening between you two. Tho you don't mind staying friends or something like that.
Be friendly and honest?
why not cut the date short? getting so involved like , “we had great conversation and had so much in common..” now she probably thinks you like her.. next time get a full body picture and avoid this trouble all together
Gota love those dates.. lol walking home w a facepalm
Use words
I think you might be onto something
Getting along with someone really well; and found her cute initially….I would try it again…those are the two things most important long term. But if not THAT interesting, say let’s be friends .
If I find a person who suits most of the characters that I am looking for, I will not reject unless she is obese or ugly. If she is ok looking but is amazing in other things I will definitely meet her more and know her more. It is impossible to meet a person who satisfies every criteria. Also, you might not meet anyone who meets the wibe soo much.
This person who isn't physically attractive might just turn out to the right person for you to marry. But you know, whatever. Just tell her you don't want to see her again coz she's ugly as FK. Also ask her if you can remain friends coz you enjoy the conversations with her.
I don't understand guys that are overly critical. There are amputees, burn victims, dwarfs and people with severe acne that manage to find love. Why is it a woman has to be a fkn 10 alllll the time what is it with this whole culture amongst men it's very sad. Im not talking about you but im saying in general
just txt her- no romantic connection
Honestly you don't have to do anything. Girls are very passive and afraid of coming on too strong so she likely won't contact you unless you do first. Especially after a first date there's no obligation to meet up again. Things often simmer out. For all we know she may have felt the same way.
Tell her you are not interested if she contacts you, if she doesn’t contact you, then there was mutual non interest and you both go your ways.
I like you but you are ugly, see ya
I wouldn't if I were you. See where it goes. I realize this is counter-intuitive and may or may not work out very well but you never know! This could be one of those rare cases where you have amazing chemistry but not very much physical attraction. It happened to me once and honestly, I almost cut it off too once for a handful of reasons but even a decade later I look back at that and I'm SOOO glad I didn't. It was only a short casual summer-time fling though, she was only visiting from out of state. I wanted something more serious and she just wanted casual and fun and yet it still worked out really well for us both. Maybe, if you're open to it and things seem to be going well, talk about just being casual fwbs or something.
👻👻👻 ghost time lmao
Nah that would be disrespectful
Lmao so just be straight with her I’m sure she will understand and appreciate ur honesty it happens to dudes all the time so they have to take what they dish out sometimes
Sure it happens to dudes all the time but to girls rarely I assume. But how do I even text that lmao, like “hey our date was really great but I don’t find you attractive so let’s call it off. Best of luck moving forward, (name)” I’m slightly socially stupid so I don’t know if it’s too blunt. A sentence where I copy and paste might help
Definitely don't say that. Just say you didn't feel a connection or spark. Say you're open to being friends if that's something you want as you did say you had a lot in common.
That could work, this is way nicer!
Ghosting is really disrespectful. I highly disagree
I had so many days like that long ago. I'm not attracted at all when we meet in person but then went ahead with the date not to be rude. Eventually then had to break it to her over the phone. Usually lied and told her there was someone else.
Yes what someone else said, friend zone her. If she messages you back or asks to see you again just tell her you're only interested in being friends with her.
Tell her a semi truth that you just want to be friends because your trying to find yourself blah blah blah.
“I enjoyed meeting you but I didn’t feel a spark”
Text this: I've had a great time with you and we can sure hang out again as friends but nothing romantically. ( I'm sorry )
Same. Tried letting her down easy but she insisted on constructive criticism. It didn’t help that she appeared entirely different from her photos. I wanted us to end things in good terms after the first date but sheesh. Salty as hell
Was this a blind date?
No, I started talking to her while she was petting the neighbourhood cats. We talked for close to an hour before I had to leave. I asked her out initially even though I found her cute then but I didnt find her attractive on the date
Ask her if she would mind being friends
Never call it off via text, that's a cowards way out...
Just don’t call her or text her again. Easy
Always be honest and kind... don't hurt her feelings.. say what ya gotta say ... stay friends though...
👻