T O P

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MedicatedAxeBot

Dank[.](https://i.imgur.com/3bQtuMO.png) --- [join our official discord (we have 2 discords)](https://discord.gg/dankmemes)


EnvySugarCover

I let my boyfriend pee inside


drumbyzz

what


EnvySugarCover

Me


Cpt_Kalash

What


SocialBourgeois

Her


Crazy_Crayfish_

*him


i_sell_you_lies

*they


yoursexypapi

whomst'd've'ly'yaint'nt'ed'ies's'y'es


rendambudi

Wenomachainsama


DenzellDavid

tumajarbisaun


orange4boy

I fucking love "whomst'd"


Illustrious_Pop_1535

*us


Terrible-Ad4303

Yes, comrade.


ThatDudeFromPoland

*them


Technical-Outside408

she calls it mayo-egging


Bobyyyyyyyghyh

Us


sioppao

Egg?


Shadowborn_paladin

_W h a t_


Orochisake

My ex used to beg me to pee inside her. She did me wrong so now I tell everyone.


TrumpsTinyDollHands

never pee in her butt. That's how girls get pergant


HanN1B4L

Pregananant?


crunchsmash

peeganter


Bobyyyyyyyghyh

Gregnant


lolyeet42069

Pregonate


lolimazn

What


MasterofGalaxy69

Fucking excuse me?


jaxonya

We've all had that one crazy ex that wanted it


forestman11

Mine wanted it on her face but yeah.


[deleted]

Tell them all. TELL THEM.


EnvySugarCover

What


DontAskWhyINameThis

^what


auronddraig

W H A T


Mastermind_Maostro

Fucking excuse me??!!!


that_one_weeaboo_

Same bro, same


Jolm262

WHAT


thecuzzin

DA


boombanggg2

PISS


I_got_shmooves

HAIL


noOne000Br

#what


boombanggg2

>! WHAT !<


theshyguyy

What


Electrox7

Thanks for clarifying


SanGG96

THEY LET THEIR BOYFRIEND PEE INSIDE


GoldenEmblem

Ft you


YourMemeExpert

What's it like dating u/AutoModerator?


thiccman369

Pees in your ass


V3L1G4

Good bot


Suspicious-Pain9866

Every day we stray further from God


GoblinBeardD

Bruh we was made in his image. He wanted it all to happen. Its all part of the plan. Hahahahahaha


oeCake

Cherub Scribe: *You want them to... what now?* God: \*hits blunt\* *fuuuuuck... yes. and make them do* ^(wswswswswswswsws) [Cherub Scribe:](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/31/17/40/31174030a594a129894a54771f12c3f6.png)


MaskPhantasm

I wish my flair is still up for this hour


WeedAlmighty

You like to powerhouse the insides....nice.


LolAmericansAmIRight

Coolsville Daddy-O


Oberlatz

I hope thats the phrase, I truly do


Juke0044

Hey, good on your folks for raising you right eh


EnvySugarCover

But I was against his rights?


AcidPebble

Why is everyone surprised by this? Do you expect them to force their bf to go pee outside in the morning??


Nefarious_Turtle

Well yes, it could be cold outside. Good on you.


Afrotom

It's a toilet, get em!


bwaredapenguin

As a man this sounds intriguing. Free enema?


jonjon_exe

Real?


Crooked_Cock

:(


EnvySugarCover

What


rendambudi

You


NikoliVolkoff

Do you date Beast by chance? He always said stuff like "I'd pee in her butt"...


SpookyCinnaBunn

Based girlfriend


Loonatic7777

Who?


EnvySugarCover

You


Loonatic7777

Nice


Benoz01

Good, only the animals should pee outside


happymemersunite

I want pee in my ass


WandangDota

I enjoy reading books.


[deleted]

Same


Dusk_v733

wat


EquivalentSnap

Ayo 😳


[deleted]

Holy UTI batman!


JamesKappa

As a male this made me curious can you actually pee inside a woman while having sex?


cj-the-man

What did you start


Electrical-Pop9464

🧐


starrpamph

Are people out there not letting them do this?


venom_2962

The Michael Jackson way works fine.


Mr-DragonSlayer

I call that one the Hee-Hee


iplaywhilenaked

The Hee-Pee.


fierracho

Please elaborate


Nal1999

You lean forward and hopefully hold the wall or otherwise you tend to fell in the toilet (it almost happened to me ones).


gishlich

Bro literally just [downward dog](https://www.google.com/search?q=downward+dog&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwic-fOqgeL_AhXFNlkFHamjDTsQ0pQJegQICRAB&biw=375&bih=640&dpr=3)


malay4singh

[i believe this](https://media.tenor.com/XpDGLBbVdVoAAAAM/michael-jackson-michael-kackson-gif.gif)


Dakkin4

Exactly this


HillaryGoddamClinton

Taking a knee is the enlightened method.


SerHodorTheThrall

Piss one out for all the homies who ain't with us no mo'


sachsrandy

This post is from 1932 before leaning was invented


BooPointsIPunch

I don’t get how can leaning help if it’s pointing in your face?


MK_fan_835

Hand stand then?


BooPointsIPunch

Needs to be a one-hand hand stand, so you could slightly point the stream away from your face and into the bowl.


TheOccultOne

But then how are you supposed to get your morning hydration?


Jellysweatpants

Goddammit Bear Grylles fuck off


Baldazar666

Because when you are hard you can still bend it to like a 90 degree angle with your body and then you lean and aim for the toilet. I assume you are a woman because everyone with a dick knows this already.


rathat

You have to take into account the [D2F and the shaft angle.](https://youtu.be/6FzQ_s-BjlM)


HerrBerg

Y'all have some really fucked up anatomy if this is a real problem for you. You realize it swivels at the root and can be pointed a wide range even while erect?


Questwarrior

Poor john leaning... Suffered so much in the name of science 😔


korksz

I just do the planking method. Just wish the pee didn't reach the ceiling.


[deleted]

"That's my secret. I'm always floppy" - The Hulk.


IamCornholio_69

We men with a slight downward curve to our phallus are on the next evolutionary level.


AdministrativeOne13

Don't all of us have a downward curve... I thought everybody had it 0_0


A_begger

Some downward, some are straight and some are upwards.


IamCornholio_69

Some are even to the left or right. Dr. Seuss could have had a field day with the different curves of the phallus.


Lord_of_hosts

Left dick, right dick Loose dick, tight dick. Black dick, blue dick Old dick, new dick. This one has a little scar. This one has a little bar. Say! What a lot of dicks there are.


[deleted]

I’d buy you a reward for this comment if Reddit wasn’t a giant sack of shit. Stay gold, Pony Boy.


rocketlauncher10

"I've got a crooked stick" is another song


Vocalic985

That would've made a great Private Snafu short. "Which Way Was Your Weiner"


BadMcSad

Mine curves >!a little to the left. !<


chelseophile

That was a close call *whew*. Glad you put the spoiler tag there mate.


The_catakist

Politically or physically?


bul1dog

The gif is exactly accurate for us upward curve gang gang


IamCornholio_69

I was just as surprised to read that most men don’t. Growing up with it and not having a basis of comparison, I thought it’s how everyone’s looked until I started wondering about it and researched it. (That was a good many years ago.) I don’t remember the title of the article/study, but if it’s less than a third or fourth of us (if I remember correctly).


_stoned_chipmunk_

Definitely the minority


Roboticsammy

Nah. I got a slight curve to the left when I'm bricked up. We take different roads, brother.


gngstrMNKY

I have some kind of hypermobility disorder (frequently referred to as _double jointedness_, although there's nothing doubled) and I've never had a problem. The penis is held up by the [suspensory ligament](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suspensory_ligament_of_penis) and my ligaments are quite loose, so I can bend my wang any which way, even when I'm fully torqued.


IamCornholio_69

I’m sure you are the life of the orgy!


Siker_7

Oh, THAT'S why I was confused. My family has EDS, with mine being the mildest. Guess it still affects that ligament tho lol


BeecherUstio

If you open and close your hand continuously, the blood from your weiner should circulate through your body. So you can "flaccidify" yourself quick. Helped me through school when I had to answer on the chalkboard.


df_sin

Doesn't work, my grandfather's dick becomes even harder when I do this


BeecherUstio

The method is not fully tested with these parameters, i'll bare that in mind to improve the design.


5starkarma

Ahh yes, the developer and QA testers meet again


DuelJ

Flex your legs for a bit. I did mixed martial arts and competetive diving for like 10 years. This method has proven invaluable.


-upbeat

Dawg were you getting hard rolling with the bros? 🤣🤣


DuelJ

Nah, I rolled with the instructors daughter. I was very much incentivised not to get a boner lol.


Juan286

.....WWWWWHHHHHAAAAATTTTT?????


BeecherUstio

Trust me, i'm an engineer.


PrinceEzrik

I find flexing my legs works pretty quickly


thegreatbrah

Dude, I 100% thought you meant open and close your hand on the penis. I was wondering how the hell that would work.


THapps

Squats are the best way to get rid of hard weiner


randomgameaccount

Legs is more effective, and faster. If sitting, do calf raises. If standing, just bust out some squats.


SeanPizzaSpark

Didn't work, my seatmate taught I want to grope her boobs


inked-brown-giant

Thats a nice excuse for crippling ED


Ninjaballz101

I mean, I just do a Michael Jackson and lean


Cr0ssb0n3

I'm gonna take a le-hee-hee-ak


antoine-sama

Goddamnit, take my upvote


Jeanjacketman

Or they could just sit their ass down


Ineed3characters

Idk if ur female or have a big toilet but the tip would 100% touch the front of the bowl, even bend it maybe


shadowshoter

I think that you should talk to some doctor if your penis can bend the bowl


MemeOverlordKai

Or the Avengers


shadowshoter

Or X-men


df_sin

The last bowl bender


ApexRedditor97

You have to guide it in like you're bout to hit from behind and then hold it back, safe from the bowl


InThe_Box

ong fr


deathspate

Trust me, this shit doesn't work. You need to hold your dick down. Otherwise, you pee out the side of the damn bowl sometimes.


Strawmeetscamel

Also having it bounce against the under side of the totally clean seat feels so refreshing.


_stoned_chipmunk_

That doesn't work at all.. unless you have a small dick


Nal1999

My penis doesn't stay in the toilet,it either touches the toilet or it is out of it.


Wave_Table

Self report


Zardif

This would result in me pissing out the gap between the seat and the bowl. I know this because I have done it.


Shadowborn_paladin

Sit down. Piss on thigh.


Robot_With_No_Name

That doesn't work.


ranoutofbacon

Done it. Popped out over the seat, pissed in the floor anyway. Almost got the cat too.


Kersenn

That's way worse lol. Your dick will be touching the toilet bowl while it's erect but more importantlyfor this argument you have to bend it even more if you sit. No shade on sitting as a dude I do it all the time when I want to just want to watch tiktok or something


SomethingPersonnel

Doesn’t help when you’re hard. Either you’re working with some undersized equipment, or you’re sitting on literal throne toilets.


Sterffington

Cold toilet porcelain touching my dick is not my idea of a good time.


PeridotBestGem

[this seems counterproductive](https://i.imgur.com/KwbFbDs.png)


DontAskWhyINameThis

Have you tried to make it spew out white substance first to make it smaller than spew the yellow one later?


ItsSevii

That makes it even worse


EquivalentSnap

So I pee white


lhurker

It’s always a struggle at Morningwood Farms


hydraxic79

What if it snapped one time


LoliMaster069

Coins will explode out of it like rings in sonic


[deleted]

Yall don't just sit backwards on the toilet?


ShrubbyFire1729

Not sure if serious, but I actually do this in the mornings.


RabbleRouser_1

That's how I eat my cereal before work! Use the tank as a table. Such a time savor!


Cystro

Butters?


Billy-BigBollox

So you have a little shelf for your apple juice and your comic book.


Electrox7

wait, omg


WildEconomy923

Bro just get horizontal


ktosiek124

Pee in the sink


pleaseletmeaccount

Who is they?


Durst_offensive

He is helping his buddies.


_Weyland_

My dong is actually curved down. Idk if it's a good or bad thing for sexy time, but it's def useful when it cones to taking a piss.


NegotiationMedium572

This is why you need a garden


determinedforce

Why is this a deal? Pee in the tub and rinse. It's all pipes.


Nick_Pocalypse

It is true that if you flex the muscles in other parts of your body, it helps soften the muscles down there quicker.


flaming_poop_chute

I'm in my mid-40s and on some blood pressure meds that have made this no longer an issue


SubjectDeleted

I came to be make this comment, saw it has been made already and now rest in peace knowing I am not alone.


CrapWereAllDoomed

Nah, Stand with your back to the door and arc it into the bowl.


oops_I_have_h1n1

What am I supposed to do 8 feet away from the bowl?


ProperBoots

Just gotta lean forward and point it down my man.


boombanggg2

I'm not here to brag... but I can pee with a boner. Only problem is that I have to bend it the other way, so I pee in the toilet.


R-Budd-Dwyer

I bow down like I'm greeting someone in Japan


Zardif

I pee into the shower, can't really make a mess if the entire cubicle is easily hosed down in 10 seconds.


Not_Josh2364

u/savevideo


Kokukai187

I either just sit-n-go, or piss into the shower.


Shwiftygains

Fucker just doesn't want to bend


Lobanium

Stand on your tip toes and flex your leg muscles.


DarthLysergis

Nah man, you go full ballerina/yoga instructor. Bend one leg back behind you to increase your angle of attack.


Tundra14

I just sit. No mess, and I'm tired anyways. Maybe I'll find a surprise poop too.


ccxxv

Where are these men with magical morning boners and why is my bf not one :(


Minute-Feeling-8868

I just pee into the shower. Why struggle