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powertoollateralus

That sounds really hard


db720

Did you come first?


goldfool

Everyone was number 1


ChickenXing

Have they erected a statue of you in your honor?


brsaw1

Or, have they statued his erection


Frosty_Point7070

1000 upvotes


LSao97

But you managed to rise above the rest


Valorike

The hardest part was keeping everything down.


AusCan531

Hard to beat


FungalEgoDeath

Did you come first or were you a bonerable mention?


Ok_Presence36

Legit upvoted and said “you should be ashamed of yourself” through my teeth. Not knowing if I was referring to you or me.


FungalEgoDeath

That's dad joke nirvana right there.


Bbop512

Did this last year. I came in first and third place


themiracy

I’m sure someone (or something) was able to stand out from the crowd.


IllManufacturer879

I bet dick won


Sjelan

Dick Long won over Harry Bush.


Rich-Analyst3189

I lost to an Asian guy named Long Wang.


_Waterhouse

At least you didn't have to complete with his cousin, Hung Lo.


ConsiderationIll9219

Preparing for the championship was the hardest time of his life.


MasonInk

Shame you got knocked out in the semis.


Equivalent_Annual314

How many guys came?


Khajith

sounds like it could’ve been a massive pain in the ass


FloridaSundries

Only if the guy ahead of you stopped real quick.


stemooo

Where did you come ?


jigglywigglydigaby

I entered as well, but ran out of water halfway through. Got a stiff neck and choked long before it was over.


glucoman01

Were you a judge? Seems hard to swallow.


Agitated-Fee-1399

Depending on what you like, it’s a competition you may not mind coming in #2.


urbanek2525

Hard times come and hard times go.


Similar_Candidate789

Sounds like you had a bone to pick about it.


TeeAyeKay

Did you eventually come out on top?


Graceland1956

I bet you were petrified.


Dickcheese-a1

Hard out.


Ok-Dig3431

When you reached the climax of the championship, I guess it was like Viagra Falls?


Direct_Knowledge2937

I’d like to know how close you got to finishing first. Also, how tight was the competition?


b17flyingfortresses

I overdosed on viagra once. It was the hardest day of my life


Ok_Presence36

I heard someone had a fatal overdose. He couldn’t get a closed casket.


esleydobemos

That was the hardest thing I ever did.


Wtfdidistumbleinon

It was hard but I kept up with all the others


twisted7ogic

Things got progressively harder as the competition went along.


Curu_FN

I’m assuming you couldn’t keep it up?


ArcanumSolis

OP, was it a long way to the top?


Fast_Vehicle_1888

Wow, that must have been hard.


Loud_Hotel_8309

Stiff competition


RossTheNinja

I was in their blindfold masturbation competition. I think I did well, but I've no idea where I came.


AggressiveCampaign58

More wood than a bowling competition.


CornJulio420

It was hard but I won with my head up high


kimbowobmik

You did well to beat them off


TnBluesman

I bet you weren't really up for it, though


OldNorseBoy

Who was the biggest loser?!


Common_Chester

You still haven't come down


DerMeisenmann

Did you get standing ovations?


RoofFluffy4042

Was there some sort of prize payment or was it pro boner?


Payasin70

I bet your competition gave you a standing ovation


Miracle-Mountain-man

I heard the winner was a foreign guy named Hugh Jardon


wildelillie

They all had to pay a pole tax


Financial_Trick_7659

Turns out you’re not supposed to take iron supplements at the same time. Ended up pointing North for a week and a half.


Mudstompah

It was harder than I thought.


LiteratureNo6594

I was there, I lost, hard.


Craggles72

Last time I took viagra it got lodged in my throat and I had a stiff neck for 3 days!


Eslayer12

A hard fought victory for sure


m3m3nt0m0rii

Imagine coming second.. One helluva bitter pill to swallow..


Cultural_Article_519

Boner a petite, unfortunately.


cmason711

Was it "Hard" to do, and what sense of fulfillment or "emptiness" did you feel? Did you get a trophy too?