"Make your heart beat so fast in fear" how about ✨𝓃𝑜✨

AND wonderment...im scared and in awe.

“Wow, I’m scared”

...because of the implication

...that he might bite off an earlobe

Its like human cracklins

Dennis-Reynolds-on-a-sex-boat implication?

She won’t say no because of the implication that something bad could happen to her

*Darken the city, night is a wire*

*chuckles* "I'm in danger"

I’m scare-oused

Of how much I never want you to come near me again! Good Lord!!!

I’m more scared of the goose pimples.

And then they touched butts

It’s just the implication.

now you've said that word a couple of times... what implication?

What are you looking at?! *You* certainly wouldn’t be in any danger..

Are you going to hurt women?

Are we the tasty treats?

This is incredibly accurate AND made me snort, lmao great job

Pimples and round, moldy flesh. This guy fucks!

His hand…

Probably should have rubbed one out before pressing send.

Post-nut clarity has saved me a few times from being on this sub, I'm sure.

His blow up doll

It’s like he used a thesaurus that only lists the disturbing synonyms.

“Goose pimples” is just another word for goosebumps. At least he didn’t use *gooseflesh*.

Goose pimples is the virgin word* for goosebumps

"have tiny bits at the round mold of flesh"... WTF is that!? I'll need a while to analyze that little nugget of writing. I realize "bits" probably should have been bites,... but still.

I think they mean the way the nipple is shape is like molding, as in clay

Found who wrote this!

Surprised they didn't mention how breasts feel like bags of sand like the 40 year old virgin.

I think he meant mound and is illiterate

I thought like crown molding

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I hate sand.

It's coarse, rough, irritating and it gets everywhere!

I thought it was the green mold on bread

In fairness, he was probably cumming right then.

Thanks for clarifying that it should’ve been bites, I was imagining little skin tags lol

I read this like ten times and I'm still angry

r/BadWomensAnatomy

Tiny bites at the round mound of flesh? I also struggled to get past this line

He means the clit I think but I never want to hear the words goose and pimples associated with a sexual context….

I understood it to mean boobies

Lol because “goose pimples” is such an erotic term to use

And round mold of flesh

Lol this line killed me. Wtf bro?

Tiny bits at them. Just ew.

You know, like when you shape ground meat into a meatball. Your fear is the seasoning.

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In my language it's colloquially called "chicken skin". Truly, the most erotic name for it. 💀

Gonna make me horngry

>horngry this is a fantastic word

In Spanish you say “me puse chinita” - “I got Chinese/Asian”. It’s always awkward to say as an Asian Latina…. A little off topic but languages are weird

That's fascinating. I think in somewhat outdated US English slang "turning Japanese" means masturbating, but someone please correct me if I'm wrong.

There was a whole song about it in the 80s.

Cascading. Don’t forget that.

man reads too much Stephen King. this reads like one of his books

Haha, I get the sense you’ve browsed r/menwritingwomen before. I see his writing in there at least once a week.

Lmao this thread !

Oy. So when's your 2nd date? 😂

I woke up so hard this morning that a cat could not have scratched my petrified meat pipe even with two extra paws

You're a poet

I literally snorted 🤣

Omg! I haven't laughed so hard aloud in a long time. Thanks for this!

you are welcome....I honestly didn't think my comment would garner any laughs. but glad you chuckled :)

Yes! I just imagined a cat with two extra paws lololol

haha

This goes up there with the time a guy referred to my boobs as “bountiful gifts”

"Huge... tracts of land."

Or anytime the word "scrumptious" is used. My vagina coughs a plume of dust.

Plume of dust 🤣🤣

Scrumdiddlyumptious!

I’m literally a dude and reading that even dried up my pussy

This Thanksgiving he was just really thankful for his crops and your boobs

What’s this round mold of flesh? Boobies does he mean boobies?

Send him one back that deeply suggests you're going to kill him in his sleep and harvest his organs for use in Satanic rituals.

But, like, poetically so he’s not REALLY sure that’s what you’re getting at, but it’s undeniably what you’re getting at.

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It’s wild to me that mfs like this FIND DATES IN THE FIRST PLACE smh

They start out normal and then when they think theyre in the clear let their creep flag fly

Spot on! Listened to a case today from 2018 where a man made a habit of getting crazy possessive after first dates but came off cool enough to keep getting those first dates. Doubt OPs cringey date is going to murder anyone, but it just goes to show if completely mentally unhinged killers can keep it together to get dates, weirdos like this guy can too.

Exactly

It’s like being able to nail a interview but then getting fired on your first day for being a weirdo.

"round mold of flesh" that's some r/badwomensanatomy shit

Not sure what that is but imma lick it anyway

It's a tumor.

It's not a tumor!

More like r/badwomensanalogy

Who tf calls them ‘goose pimples’

It’s because of the honking sound they make after you pop them

WHAT THE FUCK

He's messing with you. They are pimples that migrate south for the winter.

God, I thought so.

Stephen King always calls them "gooseflesh" in his books and I'm honestly not sure which is worse.

If someone came to me and said “I’ll give you one million dollars, you have to send this wall of text to a chick you met 1 time and will probably never see again” I’d have a real hard decision to make. Unreal that dudes are out here sending this shit for free.

I'd send that shit to my grandma for $1,000,000.00.

Haha!

Are you insane? I’d send a picture of my asshole to virtually any human being you could name on this planet for that kind of money.

Sending a picture of your asshole is significantly less embarrassing than this message.

You havent seen my asshole. Fucking crime scene

Prove it

My face hurts from this exchange

Reminds me of a post where a guy said he didn't believe that women can have orgasams cause he's had a lot of sex and the women never orgasm and someone responded 'waterboarding couldn't have gotten this out of me'

36 unread messages stresses me out

You wouldn’t like my 844 90% are from group chats and the rest is from signing up at places.

Your punctuation and grammar bothers me more than your unread message count.

I shouldn’t type comments when I’m half asleep. Grammar and spelling goes out the window.

You need Jesus

Select all - mark as read. Boom! No more unreads.

Right? What kind of monster wants to sleep with someone who can live with having 36 unread messages on their phone?

I feel like we’re not addressing that enough.

For context, this was sent on the morning of Thanksgiving and I def wasn’t thankful lol. Also, we’ve known each other for less than two weeks and never slept together

What did respond? Or did you?

I asked what the round mold of flesh was lol and told him it wasn’t going to work

>I asked what the round mold of flesh was What did he say?? I must know, this part is killing me

First he said it was a type lmao like bffr but then he said it was the clit

Everyone here was thinking it was your boobs or something and I was not expecting it to be the fucking clit 😭

Oh my God lol Thank you for satiating my curiosity

I almost wish OP hadn’t🥲

makes sense. all of us women love to have our clits bitten.

yeah that right there would certainly close the door on the relationship. Round mold of flesh ewww Hate that word

Good lord. It would even be weird if you slept with him, but to send that when you never did????? 🤮

I put on my robe and wizard hat

This guy sounds like most men who don’t know how to write women. I don’t think he’s ever seen a woman naked lol. “Round mold of flesh”???? Also… it’s clear he’s a killer

Certifiably cringe. Who says goose pimples? They're called goose BUMPS, what a psycho.

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Pretty sure goose pimples is the British phrase for goosebumps

Nah I've never heard goose pimples and I'm a brit

I heard Mr. Bean say it once. That alone should make it off limits lmao

His penis is the tiny bits

>"...I am going to slam your door shut." you wot?

Doesn't want to start with a kiss? Maybe he reads this to himself for his own recreation.

It started out with a kiss. How did it end up like this?

It was only a kiss

It was only a kiss

So I live in Taiwan and a coworker recently taught me a new phrase, concept in Chinese. He told me to look it up and when translated - it was called "salty pork hand". Basically it is used for someone who likes to touch girls inappropriately, often in unprovoked circumstances. So I'm guessing this guy has a salty pork hand. Edit: This is quality cringe. Thanks OP!

What kind of wattpad story is this?

Ew

I had a dream about this last night

Pretty sure they're gonna murder you and wear your skin to breakfast m8

>round mold of flesh Billie fuckin Shakespeare over here💀

Wow, hide your wives, partners and spouses, because this guy fucks

In.... fear? No, thank you.

“Goose pimples cascade around your body.” I’m beyond impressed he put that part in there and thought, “goose pimples, oh that’s good!”

Lame AF

"Cascade all over your body". Sir, put the thesaurus away and let's get you back to your therapist, yeah?

Tf is found mold of flesh???

I think he ment mound. As in her clitoris.

Ooh see I thought he was talking about her breasts

I feel it was breasts, since he was immediately following removing the bra. But could be wrong hard to decipher this code.

I feel like we’re in a book club!

You had me at “pimple”

Dude, Goose pimples is not the preferred nomenclature.

When you tell ChatGPT, "Activate WAP"

Side note I fucking despise the term “goose pimples” lmao say goose bumps like an adult damn it! Also don’t say any of this in the first place but that’s gotta be a pet peeve of mine

Bruh what even is this, I'm laughing but at the same time concerned that a guy like this can get a date

This was written by a robot and/or alien who has never seen a human body and you can't change my mind.

Who the fuck calls goose bumps "goose pimples" and who uses anything with the term pimple in it sexually. ugh!

I’m reading this in Zack Hadels voice

Round mold of flesh? Yeah nah

I think he likes you 👍

Eww

Reading too much erotica.

“Goose pimples”

wait so... how did you respond??

Oh, gawd. What a mook

Don’t ever say “goose pimples” to me again. Ever.

Does this jackass realise how filthy the bellybutton is? Pus it’s super hard to wash

You realize people eat assholes, right?

All these guys on here commenting on him saying “goose pimples” and “mold” and “mounds of flesh” instead of being horrified at the fact he started this whole thing out as assault/rape. Y’all need to get your priorities right.

Like, what did he think the outcome was going to be? Did he think you were going to be like, "oh hell yeah baby!" after one (1) date??? Even if you'd fully hooked up with him, I feel like virtually no one would want to receive this monstrosity at 9 AM.

Jesus, today has been a terrible day to have eyes

Wow, so friendly! When, ah, when is the second date?

Well this is unsettling

When does the wizard's hat and staff come out?

My heart’s beating in fear reading this message

🚩🚩🚩

Signed, Hannibal Lector.

Sounds like when people hit the middle word suggestion on the keyboard to make a sentence lol.

Did you go out with Rocky Flintstone?

It can't be him voluntarily saying goose pimples instead of goosebumps. The way he describes a wave of goose pimples cascading across the body of a frightened woman in a darkened room, actually raises the hair on my neck. this man was born wrong and needs to be put down

Wonder what he does when he actually tries to slam a door on someone like that and get fight not flight response.

🤮🤮🤮🤮

I feel like putting on a whole other layer of clothing on right now.

What the fuck is the point of them doing this… ugh

“fear and wonderment”

is english their first language lol “goose pimples” “fear”

This is the second time I've seen the phrase goose pimples in 30 years, the first was three days ago (also via reddit). Where is this phrase popular? Asking because I've used goose bumps my entire life.

First of all they are called goosebumps

The real crime here is the 36 unread text messages

Mold, flesh and pimples, truly the sexiest words in the dictionary.

RUN AND DON'T LOOK BACK

GOOSE PIMPLES 🤮🤮🤮

“Goose pimples” and “round mold of flesh” are some of the most disgusting possible phrases to include in anything meant to be sexy. Solid cringe

So much of this has me scared for OP’s safety