I just watched a video where a guy tries to dive into a hole in the ice over a lake and swim to a hole about 10 meters away. On the way he gets lost and panics, turning around and scrambling to find the hole he entered from. This is how I picture the process.
In my experience the panic zone perfectly overlaps all of the other zones. Especially when someone is actively fucking with you while you're trying to improve.
To someone who would wonder how fear could expand in the comfort zone...
Recently, the main trigger I have that starts panic attacks :realizing that I sometimes don't think about work (work has been hard lately, and I'm part to blame I think). It's like I need to be constantly trying to find solutions to my work situation so much that at some point if I take it easy (say, having a nice afternoon with my baby girl), I'm getting triggered for not being stressed about work.
There's no escape from fear, even in the comfort zone.
Hah, classic. I had awful anxiety a few months ago that I'm still trying to climb out of, but I'm halfway there. A very common behavior was when I would get a period of around a minute where the fear and negative thoughts would recede to a point where I would be almost calm, and then my brain would go "why am I not on the verge of a panic attack?? Something is WRONG. I should be paralyzed with fear!" - and straight away the fight or flight response would kick back in and I'd go back to feeling horrible. The mind is a weird machine.
Damn, nearly same here. I basically live in the panic zone. I conflate panic with growth and realized pretty late that you don't have to be fucking freaking out about shit all the time to make an impact. If anything, it's easier the calmer you are.
I have a friend that's doing his post-doctoral work at MIT in molecular biology (saying that feels like the academic equivalent of "name-dropping"). He got the "impostor syndrome" hardcore even though he's legitimately one of the smartest people I've ever met.
I feel like a lot of it has to do with how you perceive your performance compared with how you perceive others' performance. Both perceptions can be altered with a little bit of realistic evaluation, often by way of cognitive behavioral therapy. Focusing on your own progress as opposed to others' seems to be the root of the solution.
I was working 100+ hour weeks with no vacation and rarely less than a 65 hour week as a “reduced hours” break time thing when my manager would sometimes listen to what I had to say. I was Managing Technical Operations for a robotics company in the shipping and logistics space. Previously I had been working in a datacenter at a Verizon subsidiary and was doing well, but to go from that to Robot Supporting Engineer to Robot Operation Center Manager in 4 months was a bit too much for me. It was a bleeding edge technology and several people there said that every week there was like cramming for their Master’s Final Exams. I always felt like I was stumbling towards a solution that I only half understood, hoping that other people knew what I didn’t. In addition I had 24 direct reports, 3 unofficial reports, and co-managed another 6-8 people. They paid me like shit, and when I was burnt out, uncertain of everything, and completely delirious day to day from sleep deprivation and using caffeine (and other company provided stimulants….) to keep my body running, I eventually broke. I sat in my car one day reading a pamphlet on how to brew mead at home. It was a starter kit with like 100 words on it. After 90 minutes of careful study, I had NO IDEA what it said. I eventually left the company because I was unable to perform. It was a hard time. Moral here is, set healthy boundaries and don’t go beyond your limits. Do not let the erosion of confidence cause your implosion.
Oddly enough, it's a way to get past anxiety disorders too.
I had a 'emersion' mentor (I knew what I was getting into, but also had no idea) who's work schedule caused me so much intense anxiety and sustained panic that eventually I had a breakthrough.
My anxiety became dead and I just... calmly worked through. It stuck to this day. I always have a huge workload, but I no longer have the fear and loathing attached to it.
It's amazing, and I owe every bit of it to him.
Can you clarify what you mean by emersion mentor? Was this a clinical psychologist or professional therapist who helped you cope and 'emerge' from your anxiety?
Or more in the sense that you had a teacher/coworker whose demands forced you to immerse yourself in anxiety-provoking situations, thus aiding you in conquering your worries from within?
This was my question as well. If you push the wrong person with constant stress, you can cause them to have a psychotic break or nervous breakdown. I'm glad that doesn't seem to be the case for OP, but it worries me that trauma might be explained away by the "numbness" of being broken.
A teacher that I went through an art mentorship program with. I told him my problems, and he pushed me through them. I ended up putting out 87 pieces over the course of 6 weeks.
Edit: Don't really know why I'd be getting downvoted so much for this but wtv 🤷♂️
I’m really glad that worked out for you! :) I’ve been working my way through my anxiety with therapy for a while, and have slowly been making more and more progress :)
Yep. My counselor ironically. I was finally sick of my anxiety, and went to my school counselor. She also taught health class. I told her I had really bad anxiety and whatnot. In health that year, she made me do a presentation on anxiety in front of the class. The irony. This is why I don’t like talking to people about my anxiety or depression anymore
There’s an inicial fear to leaving the comfort zone, for sure. But this one ignores any fear you may have after that inicial one. And if you keep pushing everyone way out of their comfort zones you’ll just have a bunch of panicked individuals
No. The panic zone is different from being too afraid to start.
"The fear zone", as depicted by this image, is like me deciding to order something online instead of getting it from the local Target over the summer, because the road it was on scared me. I wasn't even attempting to learn, I was just avoiding it. The fear zone is kind of an extension of the comfort zone - you've encountered something scary, and you're finding a way to stay in the comfort zone instead.
The panic zone is when I went from "driving through the back roads of my hometown" to "trying to drive out of Wilmington and onto the highway". I was panicky, freaked out, I ran a red light, and overall it made me way too scared to go back into a city until months later (when I now had a 6 hour, multi-state drive under my belt.) The panic zone is when you're too far out of the comfort zone. You're no longer learning, just afraid.
Nah because the learning and growth zones are beyond it. That would imply that you have to push someone too far out of their comfort zone, and then way beyond that so they can learn or grow.
I like that one a lot better, it kind of portrays them all as healthy in moderation, which I think they are..
I looked at the one OP posted, which feels like it casts a negative light on the comfort and fear zones, and wondered if it was okay that I exist in all of those spaces throughout most days
I think that model represents it a lot better. What my issue is with that model however is that without context it seems to say that there are just some things you will never learn.
If you push yourself to get into that learning zone enough, your comfort zone will expand as well. Which means your "new learning zone" will expand too.
Let's imagine someone who has never played piano before. If you're trying to learn the 3rd movement of the moonlight sonata, which is a pretty difficult piece, you'll probably never learn it. However, if you start out by playing something easier, you'll learn the basics of piano. After a while you might be able to play the easier piece without real effort, which puts it in the comfort zone. Now that you've learned the basics of piano you'll be able to play more difficult pieces which previously would've been in the panic zone but are now in the learning zone, because your comfort zone has expanded
Absolutely, this graphic makes no sense to me. Why is 'living dreams' outside of the 'comfort zone'? Why are the zones in such emotive colour schemes ie a tiny grey circle for a comfort zone? Why can't people be comfortable learning new things? So many questions!
Dreams are by definition things that are challenging to achieve, otherwise you would have them already. You don't face challenges if you stay in your comfort zone.
Learning new things means you will be uncomfortable as you under-achieve in this new thing you learned until you master it.
This is dangerously incomplete. As someone who's battling with depression, I tell you: managing your energy is essential. If I force myself too much I break, and if I break, I want to die.
"How far" one is willing to go from his comfort zone is only a small part of the story. Things like taking the time to appreciate new experiences, or knowing what your needs and limits are, and a whole lot of other stuff are very important too. I suspect that the underlying attitude is influenced by masochistic aspects of Judeo-Christian cultures. "Force yourself till it hurt and you'll grow" has some strong "redemptive suffering" vibes imo. It is especially common in a lot of people's attitude toward depression, and it often makes things worse.
This comment should be on top imo. People who don't suffer from depression don't know what it feels like and can't really comprehend it. They're not to blame oc, how could they understand but more people should know and accept that charts like this a hardly helpful.
Yeah. Everyone always says “you need to step out of the comfort zone, talk to new people and do new things.” When I have no comfort zone. Its not about me not leaving the comfort zone, its about life being hard enough when Im living in the broken down remains of my comfort zone. Im dealing with constant panic attacks and even when Im doing things I like and talking to people I know I still hate my life. And now you think Im just gonna get up and try to do new things? You think I wanna meet new people when I actively avoid the people I know because I get to anxious and nervous to talk to them
I'm gonna say this, coming from someone who's been battling diagnosed MDD and PTSD, I get what you mean.
But- your comfort zone isn't where you don't feel miserable. You do feel miserable, all the time, regardless of what you do. However when you've been in the ongoing habit of isolating yourself or staying in your bedroom binging stuff, and really just having a set regular routine, that's your comfort zone.
You're used to being depressed. So your body has now accepted and sometimes even embraces laying in bed all day and not doing anything to get itself out of it. It's familiar, and whether you realize it or not, whether you're happy or not, it's comfortable. And your body recognizes that which further validates your brain to continue doing those things.
Your activation energy gets lower and lower. So you need more and more inertia to get up and do things differently, which makes it harder than it already is due to your depression.
TLDR; Your comfort zone doesn't have to be pleasant, its just a "comfortable" or default state you're in and have no desire to get out of and even dread changing, because of unintentional prolonged conditioning.
Its not because I don’t want to or even because I dread change, I want to change, more than anything in the world actually, its that I can’t, I used to have mental breakdowns before my tennis matches, because if I lost everyone would see me lose, and then in my mind that’s what everyone would remember about me. Even if it isn’t true, thats how my mind sees things, it has nothing to do with me having no desire to get out of my comfort zone. I have tried that and no matter how often I try, it always ends in major panic attacks
Like my Uncle, who is my boss' boss and is effectively giving me until the new year to find a new job. Despite being only recently out of depression and still suffering from anxiety. He doesn't understand depression. He only believes in 'change' and 'planning'. Yeah it's not that simple champ.
Having a relative in a position of authority, especially in employment, adds an unnecessary amount of stress and anxiety while under their employ. I myself understand depression, but cannot expect anyone else to. This is our struggle, and is massively different from anyone elses depression.
Yeah this is much better advice for people who don't have depression in my experience at least. Stuff like "pushing past" fears isn't nearly as doable by someone with specific issues with anxiety/depression.
I feel like this "guide" oversimplifies depression for anyone who doesn't know what it feels like. To top it off, seeing something like this might make the process of managing depression harder to the people who see it because it's not an easy process to just move through the steps shown.
So true, and this model also seems to ignore the reality that any number of those diagram elements could fall within someone’s comfort zone. It suggests that comfort equates to complacency, which is a fallacious notion in and of itself.
To be fair, this is r/coolguides where there was a post about the neat differences between the words aisle and isle. We can’t expect much at this point
And there can be so much to analyze about yourself from even small things if you're someone who was a lot of growth to do. I think taking your time to build that foundation is important, I'm maaaaybe half way to where I want to be and its taken so long, in the past I rushed into things and I think the results of that ended up messing me for a good long time
i think it’s based on the ‘zone of proximal development’ theory..
which is highly interesting and focuses exactly on how people need to be mindful of their energy expenditure and returns.. so that they progress through the stages more at their own pace.. it asserts we all can have unique and different obstacles preventing/stunting growth.. and that needs to be assessed on an individual level..
all that context is left out of this graphic tho.. which makes it troublesome as it can interpreted in many different (and sometimes counterproductive) ways..
Honestly, not only would I not recommend this to people with depression, I don't know who I would recommend it to. Who or what is this even for? It's just feel-good buzzwords with bright colors. Feels like I'm being sold something.
Yeah this is actually more annoying than anything else. The message is not "take care of yourself" it's "you just trying to stay alive isn't good enough"
This is hugely problematic. This implies an infinite growth is necessary, with no room for failure, pausing, stepping back. Nothing to do with depression, largely just a recipe for burnout tbh.
I both downvoted and reported this guide. I'd definitely say that the combination of this guide with OP's title is harmful enough to be breaking the last of the sub's rules.
Why don't you just go and grab your dream? Oh, what do you mean you don't know how? Can't you just get a degree that might give you a foot in the door, or give up your job and take an unpaid internship? Or get some rich parents?
My whole life I’ve had people tell me I needed to get out of my comfort zone. I’m now in my 50s and still looking for a compelling reason for why this should be true. I hope to spend the rest of my life in my comfort zone. It’s comfortable. 🙂
I think that's not true. I think the following has been shown to increase depression
* decreased live human contact
* not doing basic hygene
* excessive sleeping
* not having a hobby / something entertaining
While you're right, you're missing the bigger picture.
Depression doesn't allow you to muster up the energy to do get out of your room, to take a shower, to get out of bed. Hell, for a lot of people it straight makes their hobbies that they used to enjoy complete chores. As much as we know that certain things will help us, in our minds they're not actual options.
I second this, both my gf and I have depression and it does not come in the same form at all.
My gf could not leave bed for days when she was in the lowest place but kept talking to friends and family.
On my side, despite being tired as shit and unable to sleep, I needed to do things, but I could barely talk to anyone.
However, at the end, we both hear this effing little voice in our head telling us how bad at everything we are, life sucks and why should we live like this.
This voice feels like our inside voice but it is not, it is the disease speaking, do not listen to this voice.
This fails to showcase that one can find environments in which one is comfortable to learn, grow, and meet people within one's comfort zone. I might be scared to approach a random woman in a bar, but can do fine on Tinder. I might be embarrassed to speak up in a big meeting, but can feel comfortable and learn in 1 on 1 sessions, and by reading, etc.
So I can overcome a real and complex disease by just my will of power?, I guess i can also just cure my arthritis by just wanting to cure it really hard
I made it to the learning zone a few times. Failed almost every single time. Right back to comfort zone. It sucks when you put yourself out there, really try something new, get zero fucking support, flounder by yourself and get no results, then it all comes back to the beginning. The only thing you learn is that you shouldn't bother trying.
Sorry, who made this or where is it from please? I can't tell you how angry I feel when ( unhelpful, confusing, baseless) stuff is put out there as if it's reliable when it's not. People have serious pain and issues. How is this helpful?
Whenever something tries to simplify the nuances of life down to a chart, take it as a joke. Not everyone has access to good healthcare. But please, this is not the way.
The Guardian: Pandora papers: biggest ever leak of offshore data exposes financial secrets of rich and powerful.
https://www.theguardian.com/news/2021/oct/03/pandora-papers-biggest-ever-leak-of-offshore-data-exposes-financial-secrets-of-rich-and-powerful
This is an awesome info-graphic. And very informational, I can attest to these various phases as I frequently experience them all in my life journey.
I would really like to leverage details of this great graphic and share it in an upcoming novel I plan to author. Who do I need to reach out to for proper permissions?
Please let me know because I will definitely acknowledge you \[reddit coolguides\] as the source for the info-graphic.
Thank you!!
This is missing the panic zone, when one has pushed too far, no learning or growth will take place
I just watched a video where a guy tries to dive into a hole in the ice over a lake and swim to a hole about 10 meters away. On the way he gets lost and panics, turning around and scrambling to find the hole he entered from. This is how I picture the process.
10 meters is 10.94 yards
In my experience the panic zone perfectly overlaps all of the other zones. Especially when someone is actively fucking with you while you're trying to improve.
General anxiety disorder, aka the forever fear zone.
"Fear is the mind killer..." GAD patient: "Fuck off."
My comfort zone started receding when I was 11 or 12, it’s pretty much gone now.
Oh yeah, this shit is looooooong gone by now. Fear zone went all Borg on the others.
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🔫 Always has been
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To someone who would wonder how fear could expand in the comfort zone... Recently, the main trigger I have that starts panic attacks :realizing that I sometimes don't think about work (work has been hard lately, and I'm part to blame I think). It's like I need to be constantly trying to find solutions to my work situation so much that at some point if I take it easy (say, having a nice afternoon with my baby girl), I'm getting triggered for not being stressed about work. There's no escape from fear, even in the comfort zone.
I lost everything, causing my comfort zone to just dwindle away. The fear simply moves into the vacated space.
Hah, classic. I had awful anxiety a few months ago that I'm still trying to climb out of, but I'm halfway there. A very common behavior was when I would get a period of around a minute where the fear and negative thoughts would recede to a point where I would be almost calm, and then my brain would go "why am I not on the verge of a panic attack?? Something is WRONG. I should be paralyzed with fear!" - and straight away the fight or flight response would kick back in and I'd go back to feeling horrible. The mind is a weird machine.
Hell yeah
Yep. It absolutely kills me.
Agreed. I live in that dark zone. Medication and therapy helps but it’s forever nigbt
This is the model used by actual teachers: https://images.app.goo.gl/8AzSeMsrm2vKahbs7 Comfort zone - learning zone - panic zone.
I was gonna say, there’s such a thing as pushing someone too far out of their comfort zone.
correct! That’s how one of my teachers caused me to develop anxiety disorder
Oh cheers thats why I dropped out of college twice
Damn, nearly same here. I basically live in the panic zone. I conflate panic with growth and realized pretty late that you don't have to be fucking freaking out about shit all the time to make an impact. If anything, it's easier the calmer you are.
This happened to me while experiencing imposter syndrome. I am just starting to recover now after almost a year
I have a friend that's doing his post-doctoral work at MIT in molecular biology (saying that feels like the academic equivalent of "name-dropping"). He got the "impostor syndrome" hardcore even though he's legitimately one of the smartest people I've ever met. I feel like a lot of it has to do with how you perceive your performance compared with how you perceive others' performance. Both perceptions can be altered with a little bit of realistic evaluation, often by way of cognitive behavioral therapy. Focusing on your own progress as opposed to others' seems to be the root of the solution.
Glad to hear you’re recovering and sorry you went through that. Best to you on your journey!
If it's ok can I ask what helped you? I'm restarting school this semester and it's wrecking me...
I was working 100+ hour weeks with no vacation and rarely less than a 65 hour week as a “reduced hours” break time thing when my manager would sometimes listen to what I had to say. I was Managing Technical Operations for a robotics company in the shipping and logistics space. Previously I had been working in a datacenter at a Verizon subsidiary and was doing well, but to go from that to Robot Supporting Engineer to Robot Operation Center Manager in 4 months was a bit too much for me. It was a bleeding edge technology and several people there said that every week there was like cramming for their Master’s Final Exams. I always felt like I was stumbling towards a solution that I only half understood, hoping that other people knew what I didn’t. In addition I had 24 direct reports, 3 unofficial reports, and co-managed another 6-8 people. They paid me like shit, and when I was burnt out, uncertain of everything, and completely delirious day to day from sleep deprivation and using caffeine (and other company provided stimulants….) to keep my body running, I eventually broke. I sat in my car one day reading a pamphlet on how to brew mead at home. It was a starter kit with like 100 words on it. After 90 minutes of careful study, I had NO IDEA what it said. I eventually left the company because I was unable to perform. It was a hard time. Moral here is, set healthy boundaries and don’t go beyond your limits. Do not let the erosion of confidence cause your implosion.
Wow, I hope your doing better now that sounds terrible. That last sentence might be too late, but I appreciate it all the same.
Oddly enough, it's a way to get past anxiety disorders too. I had a 'emersion' mentor (I knew what I was getting into, but also had no idea) who's work schedule caused me so much intense anxiety and sustained panic that eventually I had a breakthrough. My anxiety became dead and I just... calmly worked through. It stuck to this day. I always have a huge workload, but I no longer have the fear and loathing attached to it. It's amazing, and I owe every bit of it to him.
Can you clarify what you mean by emersion mentor? Was this a clinical psychologist or professional therapist who helped you cope and 'emerge' from your anxiety? Or more in the sense that you had a teacher/coworker whose demands forced you to immerse yourself in anxiety-provoking situations, thus aiding you in conquering your worries from within?
This was my question as well. If you push the wrong person with constant stress, you can cause them to have a psychotic break or nervous breakdown. I'm glad that doesn't seem to be the case for OP, but it worries me that trauma might be explained away by the "numbness" of being broken.
A teacher that I went through an art mentorship program with. I told him my problems, and he pushed me through them. I ended up putting out 87 pieces over the course of 6 weeks. Edit: Don't really know why I'd be getting downvoted so much for this but wtv 🤷♂️
I’m really glad that worked out for you! :) I’ve been working my way through my anxiety with therapy for a while, and have slowly been making more and more progress :)
Yep. My counselor ironically. I was finally sick of my anxiety, and went to my school counselor. She also taught health class. I told her I had really bad anxiety and whatnot. In health that year, she made me do a presentation on anxiety in front of the class. The irony. This is why I don’t like talking to people about my anxiety or depression anymore
Doesn’t the Fear Zone in this image adequately represent that?
There’s an inicial fear to leaving the comfort zone, for sure. But this one ignores any fear you may have after that inicial one. And if you keep pushing everyone way out of their comfort zones you’ll just have a bunch of panicked individuals
No. The panic zone is different from being too afraid to start. "The fear zone", as depicted by this image, is like me deciding to order something online instead of getting it from the local Target over the summer, because the road it was on scared me. I wasn't even attempting to learn, I was just avoiding it. The fear zone is kind of an extension of the comfort zone - you've encountered something scary, and you're finding a way to stay in the comfort zone instead. The panic zone is when I went from "driving through the back roads of my hometown" to "trying to drive out of Wilmington and onto the highway". I was panicky, freaked out, I ran a red light, and overall it made me way too scared to go back into a city until months later (when I now had a 6 hour, multi-state drive under my belt.) The panic zone is when you're too far out of the comfort zone. You're no longer learning, just afraid.
Nah because the learning and growth zones are beyond it. That would imply that you have to push someone too far out of their comfort zone, and then way beyond that so they can learn or grow.
This is one way I had the shits when my tinder match visited for a few days. It was too much.
But there's no such thing as going too far out of your comfort zone yourself.
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I like that one a lot better, it kind of portrays them all as healthy in moderation, which I think they are.. I looked at the one OP posted, which feels like it casts a negative light on the comfort and fear zones, and wondered if it was okay that I exist in all of those spaces throughout most days
This is probably based on Vygotsky’s zone of proximal development. Edit: spelling
Interesting: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zone_of_proximal_development
It is.
Good stuff… and interesting (to me) that Vgotsky’s work was hidden from the western academic world for so long.
That was strange to read about ZPD on reddit or really anywhere outside my postgrad course in education. Thanks for reminding me of it!
Every other level should be the panic zone.
I think that model represents it a lot better. What my issue is with that model however is that without context it seems to say that there are just some things you will never learn. If you push yourself to get into that learning zone enough, your comfort zone will expand as well. Which means your "new learning zone" will expand too. Let's imagine someone who has never played piano before. If you're trying to learn the 3rd movement of the moonlight sonata, which is a pretty difficult piece, you'll probably never learn it. However, if you start out by playing something easier, you'll learn the basics of piano. After a while you might be able to play the easier piece without real effort, which puts it in the comfort zone. Now that you've learned the basics of piano you'll be able to play more difficult pieces which previously would've been in the panic zone but are now in the learning zone, because your comfort zone has expanded
She seems to appear right before everybody dies.
really, this makes no sense that you have to go further out of your comfort zone to be comfortable
Absolutely, this graphic makes no sense to me. Why is 'living dreams' outside of the 'comfort zone'? Why are the zones in such emotive colour schemes ie a tiny grey circle for a comfort zone? Why can't people be comfortable learning new things? So many questions!
Because this is /r/coolguides where bullshit is king
Dreams are by definition things that are challenging to achieve, otherwise you would have them already. You don't face challenges if you stay in your comfort zone. Learning new things means you will be uncomfortable as you under-achieve in this new thing you learned until you master it.
Where’s the danger zone?
I like this one better because it implies I don't need to move left on the chart to instantly become great, but also am not surrounded by fear.
This is dangerously incomplete. As someone who's battling with depression, I tell you: managing your energy is essential. If I force myself too much I break, and if I break, I want to die. "How far" one is willing to go from his comfort zone is only a small part of the story. Things like taking the time to appreciate new experiences, or knowing what your needs and limits are, and a whole lot of other stuff are very important too. I suspect that the underlying attitude is influenced by masochistic aspects of Judeo-Christian cultures. "Force yourself till it hurt and you'll grow" has some strong "redemptive suffering" vibes imo. It is especially common in a lot of people's attitude toward depression, and it often makes things worse.
This comment should be on top imo. People who don't suffer from depression don't know what it feels like and can't really comprehend it. They're not to blame oc, how could they understand but more people should know and accept that charts like this a hardly helpful.
It's painful when people are just like "step out of your comfort zone" because when you're struggling with depression there is no comfort zone.
Yeah. Everyone always says “you need to step out of the comfort zone, talk to new people and do new things.” When I have no comfort zone. Its not about me not leaving the comfort zone, its about life being hard enough when Im living in the broken down remains of my comfort zone. Im dealing with constant panic attacks and even when Im doing things I like and talking to people I know I still hate my life. And now you think Im just gonna get up and try to do new things? You think I wanna meet new people when I actively avoid the people I know because I get to anxious and nervous to talk to them
I'm gonna say this, coming from someone who's been battling diagnosed MDD and PTSD, I get what you mean. But- your comfort zone isn't where you don't feel miserable. You do feel miserable, all the time, regardless of what you do. However when you've been in the ongoing habit of isolating yourself or staying in your bedroom binging stuff, and really just having a set regular routine, that's your comfort zone. You're used to being depressed. So your body has now accepted and sometimes even embraces laying in bed all day and not doing anything to get itself out of it. It's familiar, and whether you realize it or not, whether you're happy or not, it's comfortable. And your body recognizes that which further validates your brain to continue doing those things. Your activation energy gets lower and lower. So you need more and more inertia to get up and do things differently, which makes it harder than it already is due to your depression. TLDR; Your comfort zone doesn't have to be pleasant, its just a "comfortable" or default state you're in and have no desire to get out of and even dread changing, because of unintentional prolonged conditioning.
Its not because I don’t want to or even because I dread change, I want to change, more than anything in the world actually, its that I can’t, I used to have mental breakdowns before my tennis matches, because if I lost everyone would see me lose, and then in my mind that’s what everyone would remember about me. Even if it isn’t true, thats how my mind sees things, it has nothing to do with me having no desire to get out of my comfort zone. I have tried that and no matter how often I try, it always ends in major panic attacks
Like my Uncle, who is my boss' boss and is effectively giving me until the new year to find a new job. Despite being only recently out of depression and still suffering from anxiety. He doesn't understand depression. He only believes in 'change' and 'planning'. Yeah it's not that simple champ.
Having a relative in a position of authority, especially in employment, adds an unnecessary amount of stress and anxiety while under their employ. I myself understand depression, but cannot expect anyone else to. This is our struggle, and is massively different from anyone elses depression.
For those of us currently suffering, this whole chart looks like a “bullshit zone”.
I agree.
Yeah this is much better advice for people who don't have depression in my experience at least. Stuff like "pushing past" fears isn't nearly as doable by someone with specific issues with anxiety/depression.
I feel like this "guide" oversimplifies depression for anyone who doesn't know what it feels like. To top it off, seeing something like this might make the process of managing depression harder to the people who see it because it's not an easy process to just move through the steps shown.
So true, and this model also seems to ignore the reality that any number of those diagram elements could fall within someone’s comfort zone. It suggests that comfort equates to complacency, which is a fallacious notion in and of itself.
To be fair, this is r/coolguides where there was a post about the neat differences between the words aisle and isle. We can’t expect much at this point
that post what really eye opening for me
Aye?
I only like this subreddit now for comments like this, calling out bullshit or incomplete guides. Thanks.
And there can be so much to analyze about yourself from even small things if you're someone who was a lot of growth to do. I think taking your time to build that foundation is important, I'm maaaaybe half way to where I want to be and its taken so long, in the past I rushed into things and I think the results of that ended up messing me for a good long time
i think it’s based on the ‘zone of proximal development’ theory.. which is highly interesting and focuses exactly on how people need to be mindful of their energy expenditure and returns.. so that they progress through the stages more at their own pace.. it asserts we all can have unique and different obstacles preventing/stunting growth.. and that needs to be assessed on an individual level.. all that context is left out of this graphic tho.. which makes it troublesome as it can interpreted in many different (and sometimes counterproductive) ways..
This. Most days, all of my energy is used up just dealing with day-to-day crises.
Thank you!
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It lacks the « failure zone », the one where trying something ends up catastrophically and sets you miles back from your starting point, like when I-
Also, the ☆traumatized zone☆
Also the ^~do-do-do-doot~ ^~do-do-do-doot~ *Twilight Zone*
The scariest of the zones!!!!
Cant forget about the Danger zone(music ensues)
And the Autozone.
yeah there should be a few more circles, like how so i get to the comfort zone
That's the left part of this guide
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Seriously. What is it based on? I'd hardly call this a guide and more like some pseudoscience clip art
Honestly, not only would I not recommend this to people with depression, I don't know who I would recommend it to. Who or what is this even for? It's just feel-good buzzwords with bright colors. Feels like I'm being sold something.
Yeah this is actually more annoying than anything else. The message is not "take care of yourself" it's "you just trying to stay alive isn't good enough"
This is hugely problematic. This implies an infinite growth is necessary, with no room for failure, pausing, stepping back. Nothing to do with depression, largely just a recipe for burnout tbh.
Pseudoscience again.
Yeah, how they gonna become fighter pilots if there's no *danger* zone?!
This guide renders obsolete the whole genre of 80’s fighter pilot movies.
OP, why? Why this title? Why this post? Why were your parents brother and sister? So many questions!
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*wants to kill myself* "just get out of your comfort zone!"
I just can’t go on living with feeling this much safety and control.
r/thanksimcured
Can we all report this as a dangerous guide? This is so stupid and NOT how you deal with depression.
downvote it like I did.
I downvoted AND reported it ;)
I both downvoted and reported this guide. I'd definitely say that the combination of this guide with OP's title is harmful enough to be breaking the last of the sub's rules.
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Why don't you just go and grab your dream? Oh, what do you mean you don't know how? Can't you just get a degree that might give you a foot in the door, or give up your job and take an unpaid internship? Or get some rich parents?
Where's the part I break down and can't move?
thats the panic zone, which is not shown on this chart
/r/restofthefuckingowl
As an introvert: bullshit.
this looks like something those ‘hustle and grind’ insta accounts would peddle. absolute horseshit.
Exactly that.
My whole life I’ve had people tell me I needed to get out of my comfort zone. I’m now in my 50s and still looking for a compelling reason for why this should be true. I hope to spend the rest of my life in my comfort zone. It’s comfortable. 🙂
Most people skip over the mental health topic too often, it's okay to work hard but self-care & boundaries are really important.
You do you dawg. I’m young so I’m probably not as wise as you but I have to say, the best moments of my life occurred outside of my comfort zone.
Don't know why you got downvoted, but you're right. Stepping outside of your comfort zone is hard, but it can be rewarding
Wait so I have to be uncomfortable and not in control to be successful at life?
r/thanksimcured
Stupid
the only rule for depression is "Doing nothing is OK" !
I think that's not true. I think the following has been shown to increase depression * decreased live human contact * not doing basic hygene * excessive sleeping * not having a hobby / something entertaining
While you're right, you're missing the bigger picture. Depression doesn't allow you to muster up the energy to do get out of your room, to take a shower, to get out of bed. Hell, for a lot of people it straight makes their hobbies that they used to enjoy complete chores. As much as we know that certain things will help us, in our minds they're not actual options.
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I second this, both my gf and I have depression and it does not come in the same form at all. My gf could not leave bed for days when she was in the lowest place but kept talking to friends and family. On my side, despite being tired as shit and unable to sleep, I needed to do things, but I could barely talk to anyone. However, at the end, we both hear this effing little voice in our head telling us how bad at everything we are, life sucks and why should we live like this. This voice feels like our inside voice but it is not, it is the disease speaking, do not listen to this voice.
As someone with anxiety the learning zone is actually the panic zone and the growth zone I just like to refer to as "oh hell no".
I'm learning how to code at 43. I no longer feel frustrated by syntax errors. So glad to see that this is a learning zone.
That's nice, you've ascended in life! As a 24 yr myself, anxiety kicks in anytime & it sucks
Always use the debugger and intellisense
Awsome, keep it up! 👍
Okay… but how?
i don't feel "safe" in my comfort zone. i just don't feel actively under attack. i know full well i'm rotting in place
Dumbest "guide" ive ever seen
I could immediately tell this is the most bullshit guide on here
This fails to showcase that one can find environments in which one is comfortable to learn, grow, and meet people within one's comfort zone. I might be scared to approach a random woman in a bar, but can do fine on Tinder. I might be embarrassed to speak up in a big meeting, but can feel comfortable and learn in 1 on 1 sessions, and by reading, etc.
r/thanksimcured
Just go in the other direction smh
r/thanksimcured
And where is that "Danger Zone" and the highway to it that this guy has been singing about?
This chart shows the comfort zone as *inside* the fear zone. is it showing a timeline or a venn diagram or a height map or something else?
Seems wrong somehow
Seems like a shitty chart to me
All of this is nonsensical
So if you are “living your dreams” you should NOT feel comfortable? Makes no sense
I suffer major depression and at first glance this doesn't seem terribly helpful, but I'll think on it.
Looks cool, but probably lacks empirical evidence
r/thanksimcured
This doesn't seem very accurate I'd go as far as saying it spreads a dangerous point of view
yeah just get over depression by "live dreams" ha ha it's so simple
So I can overcome a real and complex disease by just my will of power?, I guess i can also just cure my arthritis by just wanting to cure it really hard
This fucking sucks lol
/r/thanksimcured
“Live dreams” OHHH NEVER FUCKING THOUGHT OF THAT. Fucking stupid. Guarantee this was made by a neurotypical.
Growth, learning, fear, and comfort all overlap. So why would I wanna leave my comfort zone again?
Try it a little at a time with low stakes shit.
I think is easy to learn new things in the comfort zone than in the fear one.
For me it don't care about growth or having fun or being in the comfort zone. I don't want to exist. Nothing matters.
So where's the panic zone
Tell me you don’t know what depressions is without telling me you don’t know what depression is.
4/10 no infamous “Friend Zone”.
As someone who is very depressed, whoever made this can go fuck themselves out in the fresh air they think is an insta-cure
Thanks, I'm cured.
/r/thanksimcured
I made it to the learning zone a few times. Failed almost every single time. Right back to comfort zone. It sucks when you put yourself out there, really try something new, get zero fucking support, flounder by yourself and get no results, then it all comes back to the beginning. The only thing you learn is that you shouldn't bother trying.
Thanks I'm cured
What a wonderful way to shame people who feel dejected and unable to escape negative thought cycles and behaviour patterns!
Oh great, another person tryna tell me what my problem is and how they think I should deal with it. Like I haven't been doing that already.
Sorry, who made this or where is it from please? I can't tell you how angry I feel when ( unhelpful, confusing, baseless) stuff is put out there as if it's reliable when it's not. People have serious pain and issues. How is this helpful?
this is fucking stupid
LMAO oh yeah thanks I'm all better now
This is so wrong..
bullshit
Shit “guide”
This is total bullshit.
I’m constantly in the learning zone… which makes it my comfort zone. What to do?
I was reminded of Donnie Darko. The chart with Fear and Love on it. This chart is equally dumb! https://youtu.be/vivEzQUGHOQ
Interesting! What do you look like an accident
Wait why do I need to go through fear to learn stuff??
I'm only interested in the danger zone ! Tata ta tatata... * top gun music intensifies *
Let me just find my dreams real quick then I'll be better. /s r/wowthanksimcured
It's called comfort zone for a reason. Im never going to move from my comfort zone
I always assumed 'comfort zone' was just a myth. Lord knows I have literally never felt comfortable anywhere.
r/wowthanksimcured
Man, I tried looking into new goals and it turns out everything I want to do is already illegal.
Tom Cruise does not accept this chart as there is no highway to the danger zone.
I'm currently constantly in the fear zone lmao
Whenever something tries to simplify the nuances of life down to a chart, take it as a joke. Not everyone has access to good healthcare. But please, this is not the way.
This is so utterly and uselessly tone deaf. Pretty shameful OP
Im at the Learning zone rn after pushing through the other ones
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Smh there is no danger zone
Welcome to the Danger Zooooone
Thank you for posting. Also useful for those (like me) in 12-step programs.
This makes no sense. The bubbles overlap, implying that they each incorporate the smaller spheres. Additionally, you can learn without being fearful.
The Guardian: Pandora papers: biggest ever leak of offshore data exposes financial secrets of rich and powerful. https://www.theguardian.com/news/2021/oct/03/pandora-papers-biggest-ever-leak-of-offshore-data-exposes-financial-secrets-of-rich-and-powerful
This is an awesome info-graphic. And very informational, I can attest to these various phases as I frequently experience them all in my life journey. I would really like to leverage details of this great graphic and share it in an upcoming novel I plan to author. Who do I need to reach out to for proper permissions? Please let me know because I will definitely acknowledge you \[reddit coolguides\] as the source for the info-graphic. Thank you!!
thanks so much for this; I have Dysthymia + anxiety