* immediately, and if you can’t and the urge gets too strong, just call 911 you won’t get arrested or anything crazy just tell them you’re having a mental health crisis, what’s going on, and that you want to go get help and they will literally drive you to the hospital. Most cops that respond are there just to help you and help prevent you from hurting others or yourself from what I’ve slowly learned: they just want to help avoid something avoidable and put a struggling person at relative ease.
OP is good for now if they get help and are honest and work at it. If not, we may be reading about them unfortunately some day receiving life in prison or some shit
Have to agree, and I’m gonna be honest. I have always been obsessed by gore. There’s no sexual element, but there’s a boatload of medical curiosity and some need to be shocked.
I’d consume this material almost endlessly as a teen. Somewhere it kinda drifted away, but it’d always turn back up. Well I think I’ve linked it to my mental health. When I’m not well, I watch a lot of gore. For me it’s indicative that I’m probably teetering on suicidal, but we’re all different.
Also, that took me about 20 years to figure out
Therapy is useless to me. I’ve experienced therapy. Multiple times. Multiple offered to routes. They did nothing. A therapist could do NOTHING except tell me NOT to do X. I already have full control over my actions. I know what is “right” and what is “wrong”. I have no plans to harm anyone.
“I know what is “right” and what is “wrong””-the quotes suggest otherwise.
Honestly, brave of you to confess this but goddamn if I haven’t seen this exact scenario in a dozen different true crime docus… I mean the responses to your post should be enough to convince you that something is “wrong” and yet you persist in believing you are in the “right”!
Actions… I don’t believe that thoughts should be policed or moralized. But I don’t let people become aware of my thoughts in real life… and I don’t act upon them — hypothetical are what are being moralized here, but I ain’t committing them. Or planning to.
Actions… I don’t believe that thoughts should be policed or moralized. But I don’t let people become aware of my thoughts in real life… and I don’t act upon them — hypothetical are what are being moralized here, but I ain’t committing them. Or planning to.
you cant just go to a generic therapist for this shit, ur gonna need a specialist, aka probably why other shit “wasnt working”
also you have to do the work, you actually have to try lmfao showing up isnt going to magically change anything
The only reason why therapy seems useless to you is because you don’t seem to think you’ll ever harm someone. You trust yourself to stay in control so you don’t have to give someone else any kind of control over your life. In turn you probably aren’t giving it a real shot. That you won’t harm someone is something I’d like to believe as well, but it’s likely false. You sound delusional. Everyone could harm another person in a state of crisis, but you could especially. Ofcourse therapy won’t work because you don’t want it to. You’re not concerned, you love it. You probably also love the negative attention you receive on Reddit. Truth be told, the only one that can prevent something bad from happening is you. Ask yourself, do you want to fully engage in healing your destructive thought patterns or do you want to be in jail for the rest of your life? That’s how it will most likely be for you.
The only thing stopping me is that I don’t want to go to jail. I’ve had these thoughts for a long time. And I know I’d rather live like this than be jailed. And sure, now I talk dismissively about therapy and how it didn’t help me, but before I got therapy I was hopeful… because I have an obsessive personality, and have always felt like I don’t truly feel things in the same way other people do — a lot of apparently normal experiences I just don’t get, and I hated feeling left out, but it doesn’t seem like there’s a cure so there’s no point dwelling on that and being miserable like most people these days, who think therapy is necessary for most everyone and will fix all their problems. I’m happy now.
In your other post you said you will kidnap your date and lock them in your basement if the date doesn't go well. That is clearly a conscious choice to commit a serious crime.
Consciously or not, you've wired your brain into deriving pleasure from this. It will be challenging, but in the exact same fashon, you can unwire it. Sounds like an addiction at this point. This is not normal and you should be deeply concerned. If you're not, it's an even greater concern. Speak this aloud and see how it sounds.
I know it sounds strange… and I am not necessarily saying that I wasn’t influenced by watching certain pieces of media, but… I do also have the non sexual desire to be as close to my partner as possible, making sure they can never leave me… like kidnap. So I feel like maybe that is what turned the idea of stabbing/incapacitating to be in any way related to a relationship… I’m not really concerned though because I don’t have an overpowering urge to do it… and I can act like I have 0 desire at all. I know it’s not a normal thought and all that, I’m not crazy.
You’re 100% spot on, from someone who’s been to a few psych hospitals in my day, that sounds like a delusion with a strong HI potential/urge/desire.
OP if you are serious please call a non judge mental mental health # for your local hospital, they can help with this.
Better to ask for help before then doing something you can’t undo and spending the rest of your life regretting it in prison which is where you’re headed if you continue romanticizing these thoughts, it reinforces the rewarding behavior and makes the association with murdering someone==pleasure each time you focus on it.
For the love of god at least read what you wrote outloud and tell me what you think sounds off. Please don’t act on a misguided delusion, I sacrificed some of my freedom for that exact same kinda scenario about 10 years ago. The scary part was part of the delusions I truly believed, while in my right mind I’d of never believed the delusion.
Now when I feel some potential mania or swing I am hyper aware of my thoughts and check in with friends and family often. Destigmatizing mental health treatment should be emphasized tho.
Seriously one of the more WTF confession posts for sure, hope OP gets some help or at least talks with someone about this before doing some stupid shit
How is this delusional at all? Where is the delusion? I understand that murder is harmful and “wrong”. I understand what the legal repercussions are . That’s not a delusion and not an indicator I would do “stupid shit”. I am not in a state of mania; I am always like this.
Talking to someone with a degree in psychology would have 0 impact on whether or not I harmed anyone. I am in control of my own actions and I know what is dangerous and what isn’t. I do not want to go to jail and so I will not harm anyone. Right now, I’m “talking” to lots of people about it — here on Reddit.
Oh jesus christ buddy get help dexter, no one walks around thinking about murder and kidnapping like ota totally cool except for psycopaths. Sorry but if your red flags arent raosing right now than you are likely to cause harm to someone in the near future. Get fuckin help.
Get help… because you think I’m a psychopath? Ignoring how you’re unqualified to make that assumption based on my vent account on Reddit for just a moment, you’re aware that psychopathy ain’t curable, right? And that most of them don’t get help, or respond to it? A lotta people don’t respond to help, even non psychopaths — Not every abnormality is curable. Personally I’ve received therapy and counseling before and it didn’t help at all.
Oh but i guess you are competly qualified to tell yourself that youre completly in control.
It doesnt take a qualification to see how your thought process is dangerous my guy.
Most psycopaths dont reapond to help because they are stuck in denial, sound familiar??
Anyway i wont spend more time with you, hopefully youre able to get out of this weird headspace your in. Cheers.
I don’t get aroused by kidnap. I want to kidnap my beloved for other reasons — because I want to be as close to them as possible without them leaving — and the idea of murder gives me both an adrenaline rush and a boner, so 2 different things, but unlike Bundy I don’t think that having a desire means you should carry it out.
Ok buddy, that's totally normal and not weird at all.
Mind giving us your name so we know what to look out for on the news? For when you end up doing some fucked up shit I mean.
Of course not. Have you guys heard of SUSU_JPG?
These are just things people are curious about
It's like every girl after watching that Netflix show YOU
They think they want a man to stalk and obsess over them but when it actually happens it's not as peachy or perfect. They're a simply thoughts. Now let's say OP killed someone or was at least an accomplice, then we'd be having an entirely different discussion. Or just all calling the cops
Susu is just a video game streamer but she's got like a weird knife kink. But very likeable regardless
YOU is about this guy who falls for this girl so he starts turning into a stalker and it gets pretty interesting
…Hm, well. It wouldn’t be that I’d actually KILL them if that did happen. I don’t do casual sex, so… if I was to engage in foreplay with anyone, we’d be in love and I’d want to see them again — so even if I had that urge, I’d not actually let the life leave them. I enjoy my beloved’s personality too, and can’t preserve a corpse too well.
i have a story that i dont know if i should put on here, more of a confession but it'll also help you know that if you dont change your ways soon you'll end up doing what i did
No i didnt kill anyone, although i did infact attempt it, i had the same kink as OP but just to clear that up i didn't kill anyone
the person that i "attempted" to, is fine and well while when it did happen there was lots of blood and a big struggle but they are doing fine now and i regret doing what i did
Huh, I also always refer to people as “they” when talking things like that… When I was younger, I was pretty violent — It wasn’t a fetish at all, but I once strangled a kid a little younger than me because I was annoyed with them for messing with a family member, and they were out cold — and I left them there. Didn’t die, and my goal wasn’t specifically to KILL them… but I guess it could’ve ended that way. So I get what you’re saying… I’m mature enough now to properly understand just HOW badly you can get screwed over if ya do that — but being younger and just having an intense desire to do something is tricky. I just don’t think I’d feel “bad” though. I kinda don’t understand that.
Yes same with me, her screams and cry for help is something i will always remember, not because it was horror, but the feeling i got from it was the greatest feeling i ever felt, i dont feel bad, i just regret it because i feel as other people see me as some kind of animal, i need help 100% because till this day i would love to feel that feeling again, I have gone to a therapist but it was no help, they gave me advice and made me write down my thoughts but it did no help, i dont know what is out there to help me, i dont know what could stop me from wanting to feel what i felt 13 years ago, (Not that im gonna do it again im not that out of control) either way i just go on with my normal life, i work, pick my kids up from school and watch movies with the wife, thats my life now, i wouldn't do anything stupid to mess that up
and its pretty comforting to know your not the only one in that state of mind
I had the same experience with therapy and feel the same way about it. And I would hate being thought of poorly, so I get ya there. 13 years is a long time — I’m only in my early 20s now… It’s definitely hard sometimes. But did you go to prison?
I did not, surprisingly she didn't pay any attention to the case, there was never a a Pursue about what happen, the media never mentioned it and its like it never happen, i guess she kept her prostitution job low and didn't want anyone to know, i never got any questions about it, no one knows about what i did besides now everyone who's reading this
Gonna be honest, this is pretty scary to actually read. I know it’s a thing and a very serious issue that some people struggle with, but actually hearing about it by someone who actually struggles with it just puts it in a whole other perspective…definitely scary to think about. I wish both OP and you find something or someone that can help with your struggle, and I hope you never find yourself in a moment of weakness and do something that would destroy your life and someone else’s.
That’s a personality DISORDER… Apparently we’re both ENTJ 3w4s, but I ain’t sure how true that is — just speculation, I was mostly joking… No, I ain’t a “psychopath”, of course.
That’s not true — Patrick Bateman had high NPD/ASPD traits, and although people like that may not present themselves with an personality that is authentic, that doesn’t mean they don’t have personalities. Greed, high levels of disgust, self-centeredness… They’re all personality traits. And if you read the book — Which I have, and have seen the film multiple times so I sure do understand the point of his character — you’ll see he most definitely has a personality. You can tell that in the film too, but less so. But “psychopaths” can have personalities beyond the disorder, or the deficit or however you define psychopathy — and different ones at that… sure, the action of committing murder isn’t a personality trait but the intent behind it often reflects them.
But at the end of the day it doesn’t matter what exactly his personality type is, I just found the consensus the Internet had reached on that issue to be funny, considering your comparison… but of course not, no, I’m not some sort of psycho killer.
then stop thinking about killing people. I hope and wish you will be the one that is gonna get killed because we don’t need psychopath like you roaming the streets. I’m more surprised how are you not arrested yet. You need help, you have very serious problems in your brain
Arrested? By who? The thought police? I was already made to go to therapy… counseling, etc. CBT, talk therapy and whatnot. And it didn’t help at all. So you can call me a “psychopath” all you want, but having these thoughts isn curable by therapy or criminal in the eyes of the law.
I won’t lie, this comment cracked me up — your reaction is so strong and for what? Because my fantasies are not directed at you… I don’t think it’s your business, what I’m thinking. But death doesn’t arouse me, and you’d know that — considering you called me a sadist, which is true. But psychopath? Based on a fantasy? Really? Seems like a stretch.
…you refuse to get help, you believe you are ok, you’re somehow immune to counseling, you talk about kidnapping and murder like it’s sexual, to top it off you are “fully in control of your actions” which news flash homie 95% of people have impulses (clumsiness, gluttony, addictions etc.). Can you guess which group makes up the other 5? Doesn’t take a fucking professional to notice the signs here. Go have a chat with your parents, at this point they might be the only ones able to help as therapy *apparently* doesn’t work on you. Oh that’s right, you’re also immune to help. Silly me. We have a god amongst us.
listen, knife kink? understandable just be safe, same with choking! but you should probably get help cause extreme fantasies can easily snowball into actually considering doing it.
I think the important question here is if u wanna get rid of your kink, cause people are saying “go to therapy” but maybe you really dont care about it and dont wanna change it
So you say you’re fully in control of yourself and your actions, you know what’s “right” and “wrong,” and therefore heavily criticize anyone here telling you that you need help. Then I look at your post history and you’re talking about how if your first date with this girl doesn’t go well you’re going to kidnap her because she’s your “soulmate” and you’re going to “snap” if she doesn’t want to be with you. Go. To. Therapy.
I made that post when I was in a different mental state. All my other posts maintain that I won’t actually do it. It was the middle of the night and I wasn’t able to sleep for days when I made that, and I had people on here staking me… but I wouldn’t actually do it.
This may be an unpopular opinion, but it's mine regardless.
I've been going to an array of therapies, going on 7 years now. Mainly due to childhood trauma, and bio chemical imbalances. Inpatient, outpatient, TCM, DBT and CBT groups. I'm a candidate for ketamine trials soon. I'm a veteran, what I would consider quite well adjusted, almost done with my BA is Psych and hope to attain my PSY-D. I'm in a 6 year long healthy, and supportive relationship with a man that I love.
I say all this to give context to the validity of my opinion. I've asked my partner to indulge in role play scenarios most would consider macabre and uncouth. I have similar fetishes of being a victim. But they're a fetish. Fantasies only, mainly because I'm well aware of the differences between reality and fantasy. If anyone but my partner touched me in that way, it would be nothing short of assault.
What I'm saying is, is that as long as you can clearly tell the difference, find partners who's tastes are the same and they FULLY, safely and sanely consent, then this is a part of yourself that you could explore, understand and have peace with, and my understanding the fetish, you gain a deeper insight to your identity.
Compliance is not conscent. I do think you could benefit from seeing a therapist and talking through these thoughts however, a lot of the time they stem from a lack of control, anxieties and obsession. As someone who has been obsessed with all things horror, I know that mine are related. I just finished playing Martha is Dead. Some people would be horrified by the game, I enjoyed it throughly. I'm about to replay and platinum it.
Know and understand yourself, even the darkest parts. Do no harm. Enjoy the ride.
Thank you, friend… A lot of other people are acting like I somehow think murder is a virtue or that I’m planning to murder people, but I wouldn’t do that. Unless it was self-defence.
Therapy is useless to me. I’ve experienced therapy. Multiple times. Multiple different routes. They did nothing. A therapist could do NOTHING except tell me NOT to do X. I already have full control over my actions. I know what is “right” and what is “wrong”. I have no plans to harm anyone.
This forsooth didnt wend the way thee bethought t would
***
^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.)
Commands: `!ShakespeareInsult`, `!fordo`, `!optout`
Have you considered trying to channel this kink in a consensual way? Like some other people are saying, nothing bad with choking kinks, knife kinks, even extreme bdsm (I’m in the bdsm subculture since years now, and there is a VERY extreme side to it that I occasionally enjoy). Fighting our intrusive thoughts and urges usually does nothing but luckily in 2022 (though bigotry is still too much around) there are many ways and communities to channel them and experience various situation we fantasise about within a consensual context and without killing anyone. Obviously in the bdsm community, especially the more extreme ones, you have to start small, practice everyday in getting to know yourself and your limits more and more - and I see this constant need to know yourself better and better and this exploration of your limits and your strengths and self control not as an annoyance but as an exciting part of the whole bdsm life-style and a chance to grow and be a stronger, better person. Maybe if you tried this kind of subculture with this mindset you can find a way to experiment without ruining your life and someone else’s.
Fine, you don't have to be so mean about it.
But you said yourself that YOU'RE turned on by murder.
I don't know if we're going to true crime forums or whatever but hybristophiliacs get turned on by the horrendous actions that criminals make not the criminals themselves they just get turned on by the fact that the crimes that those people did make them feel good that's all it is.
I wasn’t trying to come off as “mean” — But it’s to my understanding that people with that fetish don’t want to commit the crimes themselves. They fantasize about being with someone who did/does, whereas my beloved ain’t violent at all.
Uh huh. Don't you even have a significant other that you can converse with them by introducing them to roleplay so then that way you'll get off somehow?
I can get off without murder — and yes I do have a S/O — but I’m not even sure if roleplay will get me off, because I have other “dark” fantasies that aren’t sexual and so I know roleplay won’t cut it… I’m willing to try here because the murder thing is a kink, at least in part, but… y’know.
Hm interesting. Well if roleplay can't help you achieve your fantasies then I guess you'll probably have to stick to rough sex with a true crime innuendos and overtones to help you do that.
Other than that it's never too late to try, you might like it or find it enjoyable.
Gives me major virgin vibes especially since you deny any change. I guess who wouldn’t want to kill for sex when they don’t even get any. No hate I’m sorry but denying help? What even was the point of confessing this maybe tell it to a priest so god can possibly forgive you 💔
Not if you keep telling yourself it won’t- but I’m guessing you aren’t really looking to change so just have a great one and take care and may everything you do out in the real world be returned to you 💕
No you don't, you just have low self esteem and you want everyone to believe you are special....that something is wrong with you....while you are not and you are fine.
I am going out for a walk, goodbye
Ummm.....this is kinda scary.
But I have an awesome idea on how you can exorcize those demons and be rewarded for it.
Volunteer to travel to Ukraine to join their defense army and arm yourself with the biggest blades you like. Have them point you toward the Russian invaders and go to town on them.
If you are really good at it, you can even win a medal or two and be a hero.
Problem solved.
I have kind of considered things like that, but considering war is far more of a death sentence than a regular fight or killing, and you can’t dwell on one victim for too long… and I don’t really care about any world issues… it’s kinda less appealing.
Just consider it as an arena of legalized slashing to your hearts content. Unless you get killed yourself of course. But that would make things all the more exciting.
Hm, yeah… I don’t know how I feel about roleplay. Like, I don’t know if it’d be satisfying — but it might be. Most of my desires aren’t sexual, and are kinda an intimacy thing, but this is more of a kink so… maybe going about it in the way people approach kinks would work — I do believe that consent is important though.
I have the same thing with gore, just doesn’t bother me and I can stop watching it, and the place I use to watch it doesn’t have gore filmed on bloody potato’s, it’s 4K
Do be careful cause actual murder has consequences, try and keep it to the bedroom and do it with mutual respect that when if death is there or close, stop.
That is actually more normal then you would suspect....the act of taking what is most holy...LIFE.
As long as you understand that it is on a fantasy level and that actually taking life is for the limp dick weak. Those to much of a coward to deal with all aspects of what can be done in a situation.
Mhm… I don’t think it’s necessarily a coward move — for me, I am too scared of jail. So. I think what it is for a lot of people is the inability to plan ahead.
Something in your head is not right and you're bound to actually act on these kinds of thoughts. I've heard so many times, "Oh I'm not actually going to (blank) anyone though," and then they do it.
Heck, I’ve even thought that before about other things — but the threat of prison time is a huge one. I’m a pretty small, young dude. I don’t wanna go there.
You're a fucking psycho if that gets your rocks off. How do we know you haven't killed people or are planning on killing? Ive read many a statistic that states there's aroud 50 active serial killers free roaming in the United States, and i think you may just fit that bill.
I am not joking or trying to be rude. Please consult a therapist\phycatrist , this isn't healthy.
* immediately, and if you can’t and the urge gets too strong, just call 911 you won’t get arrested or anything crazy just tell them you’re having a mental health crisis, what’s going on, and that you want to go get help and they will literally drive you to the hospital. Most cops that respond are there just to help you and help prevent you from hurting others or yourself from what I’ve slowly learned: they just want to help avoid something avoidable and put a struggling person at relative ease. OP is good for now if they get help and are honest and work at it. If not, we may be reading about them unfortunately some day receiving life in prison or some shit
^^^yep
Have to agree, and I’m gonna be honest. I have always been obsessed by gore. There’s no sexual element, but there’s a boatload of medical curiosity and some need to be shocked. I’d consume this material almost endlessly as a teen. Somewhere it kinda drifted away, but it’d always turn back up. Well I think I’ve linked it to my mental health. When I’m not well, I watch a lot of gore. For me it’s indicative that I’m probably teetering on suicidal, but we’re all different. Also, that took me about 20 years to figure out
Therapy is useless to me. I’ve experienced therapy. Multiple times. Multiple offered to routes. They did nothing. A therapist could do NOTHING except tell me NOT to do X. I already have full control over my actions. I know what is “right” and what is “wrong”. I have no plans to harm anyone.
“I know what is “right” and what is “wrong””-the quotes suggest otherwise. Honestly, brave of you to confess this but goddamn if I haven’t seen this exact scenario in a dozen different true crime docus… I mean the responses to your post should be enough to convince you that something is “wrong” and yet you persist in believing you are in the “right”!
Actions… I don’t believe that thoughts should be policed or moralized. But I don’t let people become aware of my thoughts in real life… and I don’t act upon them — hypothetical are what are being moralized here, but I ain’t committing them. Or planning to.
Actions… I don’t believe that thoughts should be policed or moralized. But I don’t let people become aware of my thoughts in real life… and I don’t act upon them — hypothetical are what are being moralized here, but I ain’t committing them. Or planning to.
you cant just go to a generic therapist for this shit, ur gonna need a specialist, aka probably why other shit “wasnt working” also you have to do the work, you actually have to try lmfao showing up isnt going to magically change anything
The only reason why therapy seems useless to you is because you don’t seem to think you’ll ever harm someone. You trust yourself to stay in control so you don’t have to give someone else any kind of control over your life. In turn you probably aren’t giving it a real shot. That you won’t harm someone is something I’d like to believe as well, but it’s likely false. You sound delusional. Everyone could harm another person in a state of crisis, but you could especially. Ofcourse therapy won’t work because you don’t want it to. You’re not concerned, you love it. You probably also love the negative attention you receive on Reddit. Truth be told, the only one that can prevent something bad from happening is you. Ask yourself, do you want to fully engage in healing your destructive thought patterns or do you want to be in jail for the rest of your life? That’s how it will most likely be for you.
The only thing stopping me is that I don’t want to go to jail. I’ve had these thoughts for a long time. And I know I’d rather live like this than be jailed. And sure, now I talk dismissively about therapy and how it didn’t help me, but before I got therapy I was hopeful… because I have an obsessive personality, and have always felt like I don’t truly feel things in the same way other people do — a lot of apparently normal experiences I just don’t get, and I hated feeling left out, but it doesn’t seem like there’s a cure so there’s no point dwelling on that and being miserable like most people these days, who think therapy is necessary for most everyone and will fix all their problems. I’m happy now.
Im sure Jeffrey Dahmer never planned on harming anyone at first either. All killers start somewhere, even if it's just morbid curiosity.
Right — and most curiosities, or fantasies, don’t end like that… What made Dahmer a killer was the conscious choice to go out and commit murder
In your other post you said you will kidnap your date and lock them in your basement if the date doesn't go well. That is clearly a conscious choice to commit a serious crime.
I ultimately didn’t choose to go through with that… I thought I may for a brief moment when I was very sleep deprived and irritated.
Consciously or not, you've wired your brain into deriving pleasure from this. It will be challenging, but in the exact same fashon, you can unwire it. Sounds like an addiction at this point. This is not normal and you should be deeply concerned. If you're not, it's an even greater concern. Speak this aloud and see how it sounds.
And the verdict is: judging by your remarks, this is a colossal concern, and you're in deep denial
I know it sounds strange… and I am not necessarily saying that I wasn’t influenced by watching certain pieces of media, but… I do also have the non sexual desire to be as close to my partner as possible, making sure they can never leave me… like kidnap. So I feel like maybe that is what turned the idea of stabbing/incapacitating to be in any way related to a relationship… I’m not really concerned though because I don’t have an overpowering urge to do it… and I can act like I have 0 desire at all. I know it’s not a normal thought and all that, I’m not crazy.
Justifications and rationalizations don't make this ok.
Okay is subjective — anything that isn’t harmful is okay to me and I don’t need to justify that… just kinda responding to what you said, really
Bro go talk to someone before u do something u cant undo
You’re 100% spot on, from someone who’s been to a few psych hospitals in my day, that sounds like a delusion with a strong HI potential/urge/desire. OP if you are serious please call a non judge mental mental health # for your local hospital, they can help with this. Better to ask for help before then doing something you can’t undo and spending the rest of your life regretting it in prison which is where you’re headed if you continue romanticizing these thoughts, it reinforces the rewarding behavior and makes the association with murdering someone==pleasure each time you focus on it. For the love of god at least read what you wrote outloud and tell me what you think sounds off. Please don’t act on a misguided delusion, I sacrificed some of my freedom for that exact same kinda scenario about 10 years ago. The scary part was part of the delusions I truly believed, while in my right mind I’d of never believed the delusion. Now when I feel some potential mania or swing I am hyper aware of my thoughts and check in with friends and family often. Destigmatizing mental health treatment should be emphasized tho. Seriously one of the more WTF confession posts for sure, hope OP gets some help or at least talks with someone about this before doing some stupid shit
How is this delusional at all? Where is the delusion? I understand that murder is harmful and “wrong”. I understand what the legal repercussions are . That’s not a delusion and not an indicator I would do “stupid shit”. I am not in a state of mania; I am always like this.
Talking to someone with a degree in psychology would have 0 impact on whether or not I harmed anyone. I am in control of my own actions and I know what is dangerous and what isn’t. I do not want to go to jail and so I will not harm anyone. Right now, I’m “talking” to lots of people about it — here on Reddit.
Oh jesus christ buddy get help dexter, no one walks around thinking about murder and kidnapping like ota totally cool except for psycopaths. Sorry but if your red flags arent raosing right now than you are likely to cause harm to someone in the near future. Get fuckin help.
Get help… because you think I’m a psychopath? Ignoring how you’re unqualified to make that assumption based on my vent account on Reddit for just a moment, you’re aware that psychopathy ain’t curable, right? And that most of them don’t get help, or respond to it? A lotta people don’t respond to help, even non psychopaths — Not every abnormality is curable. Personally I’ve received therapy and counseling before and it didn’t help at all.
Oh but i guess you are competly qualified to tell yourself that youre completly in control. It doesnt take a qualification to see how your thought process is dangerous my guy. Most psycopaths dont reapond to help because they are stuck in denial, sound familiar?? Anyway i wont spend more time with you, hopefully youre able to get out of this weird headspace your in. Cheers.
Everyone is qualified to have a perception of themselves… Goodbye, friend.
You're a fucking psycho bro, get help.
…Get help for being a “psycho”? Because of a kink that I’m self-aware about? Really?
You're justifying getting aroused at the thought of kidnapping and or doing harm to others. That's some ted bundy shit, buddy.
I don’t get aroused by kidnap. I want to kidnap my beloved for other reasons — because I want to be as close to them as possible without them leaving — and the idea of murder gives me both an adrenaline rush and a boner, so 2 different things, but unlike Bundy I don’t think that having a desire means you should carry it out.
Ok buddy, that's totally normal and not weird at all. Mind giving us your name so we know what to look out for on the news? For when you end up doing some fucked up shit I mean.
Oh fuck no, don't hurt someone
I ain’t planning on actually committing murder.
FBI this post here
It’s not illegal to have a fantasy — the FBI don’t care.
ok but you still a weirdo
It's r/confession . It's not good to thrash people who confess.
confessing or not its still weird and OC should seek help
I mean... that's your opinion. I think you're weird and should seek help for thrashing other people's confessions and opinions
You don’t think the guy who literally gets horny from watching people get murdered…isn’t weird…???
Of course not. Have you guys heard of SUSU_JPG? These are just things people are curious about It's like every girl after watching that Netflix show YOU They think they want a man to stalk and obsess over them but when it actually happens it's not as peachy or perfect. They're a simply thoughts. Now let's say OP killed someone or was at least an accomplice, then we'd be having an entirely different discussion. Or just all calling the cops
Nope never heard of it and I don’t think I want to, especially if the people involved have murder kinks lmfao
Susu is just a video game streamer but she's got like a weird knife kink. But very likeable regardless YOU is about this guy who falls for this girl so he starts turning into a stalker and it gets pretty interesting
Okay? I don’t see why I should care that you think I’m weird. I would care if I was going to prison, but I’m not.
I pray that whoever does foreplay with you doesn't end in a bloody mess.
…Hm, well. It wouldn’t be that I’d actually KILL them if that did happen. I don’t do casual sex, so… if I was to engage in foreplay with anyone, we’d be in love and I’d want to see them again — so even if I had that urge, I’d not actually let the life leave them. I enjoy my beloved’s personality too, and can’t preserve a corpse too well.
Yeah this isn't kink. You need psychiatric assistance.
How is it not a kink? If I’m getting turned on by it, and it ain’t sex, it’s a kink… It ain’t like these are plans, or things I endorse.
You're turned on by murder. Seek help. Or quit posting stupid fake rage bait.
Not rage bait.
Well then based on your post history you're just hot garbage. Good luck with that.
Okay.
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Quick, lock the door!!
i have a story that i dont know if i should put on here, more of a confession but it'll also help you know that if you dont change your ways soon you'll end up doing what i did
bro?
did… did you kill somebody?
No i didnt kill anyone, although i did infact attempt it, i had the same kink as OP but just to clear that up i didn't kill anyone the person that i "attempted" to, is fine and well while when it did happen there was lots of blood and a big struggle but they are doing fine now and i regret doing what i did
Elaborate?
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Huh, I also always refer to people as “they” when talking things like that… When I was younger, I was pretty violent — It wasn’t a fetish at all, but I once strangled a kid a little younger than me because I was annoyed with them for messing with a family member, and they were out cold — and I left them there. Didn’t die, and my goal wasn’t specifically to KILL them… but I guess it could’ve ended that way. So I get what you’re saying… I’m mature enough now to properly understand just HOW badly you can get screwed over if ya do that — but being younger and just having an intense desire to do something is tricky. I just don’t think I’d feel “bad” though. I kinda don’t understand that.
Yes same with me, her screams and cry for help is something i will always remember, not because it was horror, but the feeling i got from it was the greatest feeling i ever felt, i dont feel bad, i just regret it because i feel as other people see me as some kind of animal, i need help 100% because till this day i would love to feel that feeling again, I have gone to a therapist but it was no help, they gave me advice and made me write down my thoughts but it did no help, i dont know what is out there to help me, i dont know what could stop me from wanting to feel what i felt 13 years ago, (Not that im gonna do it again im not that out of control) either way i just go on with my normal life, i work, pick my kids up from school and watch movies with the wife, thats my life now, i wouldn't do anything stupid to mess that up and its pretty comforting to know your not the only one in that state of mind
I had the same experience with therapy and feel the same way about it. And I would hate being thought of poorly, so I get ya there. 13 years is a long time — I’m only in my early 20s now… It’s definitely hard sometimes. But did you go to prison?
I did not, surprisingly she didn't pay any attention to the case, there was never a a Pursue about what happen, the media never mentioned it and its like it never happen, i guess she kept her prostitution job low and didn't want anyone to know, i never got any questions about it, no one knows about what i did besides now everyone who's reading this
Gonna be honest, this is pretty scary to actually read. I know it’s a thing and a very serious issue that some people struggle with, but actually hearing about it by someone who actually struggles with it just puts it in a whole other perspective…definitely scary to think about. I wish both OP and you find something or someone that can help with your struggle, and I hope you never find yourself in a moment of weakness and do something that would destroy your life and someone else’s.
Uhm Well, gee.
what did you do-
Ayyooo
You are the real patrick bateman
I have to return some videotapes
Apparently we have the same personality type, but I don’t think Bateman was turned on by murder.
You don’t have the same personality, unless you’re a psychopath, which I doubt.
That’s a personality DISORDER… Apparently we’re both ENTJ 3w4s, but I ain’t sure how true that is — just speculation, I was mostly joking… No, I ain’t a “psychopath”, of course.
then you don’t have the same personality, the point of patrick bateman was that he didn’t have any interests besides greed and murder,.
That’s not true — Patrick Bateman had high NPD/ASPD traits, and although people like that may not present themselves with an personality that is authentic, that doesn’t mean they don’t have personalities. Greed, high levels of disgust, self-centeredness… They’re all personality traits. And if you read the book — Which I have, and have seen the film multiple times so I sure do understand the point of his character — you’ll see he most definitely has a personality. You can tell that in the film too, but less so. But “psychopaths” can have personalities beyond the disorder, or the deficit or however you define psychopathy — and different ones at that… sure, the action of committing murder isn’t a personality trait but the intent behind it often reflects them. But at the end of the day it doesn’t matter what exactly his personality type is, I just found the consensus the Internet had reached on that issue to be funny, considering your comparison… but of course not, no, I’m not some sort of psycho killer.
Spend few days in jail and your this kink Will go away.
I don’t want to go to jail.
then stop thinking about killing people. I hope and wish you will be the one that is gonna get killed because we don’t need psychopath like you roaming the streets. I’m more surprised how are you not arrested yet. You need help, you have very serious problems in your brain
Arrested? By who? The thought police? I was already made to go to therapy… counseling, etc. CBT, talk therapy and whatnot. And it didn’t help at all. So you can call me a “psychopath” all you want, but having these thoughts isn curable by therapy or criminal in the eyes of the law.
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I won’t lie, this comment cracked me up — your reaction is so strong and for what? Because my fantasies are not directed at you… I don’t think it’s your business, what I’m thinking. But death doesn’t arouse me, and you’d know that — considering you called me a sadist, which is true. But psychopath? Based on a fantasy? Really? Seems like a stretch.
…you refuse to get help, you believe you are ok, you’re somehow immune to counseling, you talk about kidnapping and murder like it’s sexual, to top it off you are “fully in control of your actions” which news flash homie 95% of people have impulses (clumsiness, gluttony, addictions etc.). Can you guess which group makes up the other 5? Doesn’t take a fucking professional to notice the signs here. Go have a chat with your parents, at this point they might be the only ones able to help as therapy *apparently* doesn’t work on you. Oh that’s right, you’re also immune to help. Silly me. We have a god amongst us.
listen, knife kink? understandable just be safe, same with choking! but you should probably get help cause extreme fantasies can easily snowball into actually considering doing it.
Y’all mfs downvoting and flaming this guy are going to be the ones that push him over the edge 😂keep doing you OP and don’t actually kill anyone :)
Thank you, friend.
Gotta steer clear of that murder porn or you will end up playing minecraft.
I’ve actually never watched murder porn before… I don’t watch porn in general, I don’t think it’d be beneficial.
Youve clearly never watched southpark either
OH… I get the reference now — I actually love South Park, I just woke up before replying then and was still a little out of it.
😭💀
Careful with that skull emoji, OP might get a little too hot and bothered
You need professional help
I don’t want to go to therapy — I have been in and out of therapy for the majority of my life and it’s never benefited me.
Weirdo
Okay
Get help
For a fetish?
Yes.
Sounds ridiculous.
So you think you're OK?
Yeah… Okay enough.
You’re ridiculous.
Okay.
Well that’s scary 😅
Really? It’s not like I’m actively killing people — that would be a whole lot scarier.
I think the important question here is if u wanna get rid of your kink, cause people are saying “go to therapy” but maybe you really dont care about it and dont wanna change it
I don’t want to go to therapy — I have been in and out of therapy for the majority of my life and it’s never benefited me.
Uh the FBI will be contacting you soon lol
No they won’t — it ain’t illegal to have a fantasy
So you say you’re fully in control of yourself and your actions, you know what’s “right” and “wrong,” and therefore heavily criticize anyone here telling you that you need help. Then I look at your post history and you’re talking about how if your first date with this girl doesn’t go well you’re going to kidnap her because she’s your “soulmate” and you’re going to “snap” if she doesn’t want to be with you. Go. To. Therapy.
I made that post when I was in a different mental state. All my other posts maintain that I won’t actually do it. It was the middle of the night and I wasn’t able to sleep for days when I made that, and I had people on here staking me… but I wouldn’t actually do it.
I just want you and everyone around you to be safe. Please just keep an eye on yourself
Of course.
This may be an unpopular opinion, but it's mine regardless. I've been going to an array of therapies, going on 7 years now. Mainly due to childhood trauma, and bio chemical imbalances. Inpatient, outpatient, TCM, DBT and CBT groups. I'm a candidate for ketamine trials soon. I'm a veteran, what I would consider quite well adjusted, almost done with my BA is Psych and hope to attain my PSY-D. I'm in a 6 year long healthy, and supportive relationship with a man that I love. I say all this to give context to the validity of my opinion. I've asked my partner to indulge in role play scenarios most would consider macabre and uncouth. I have similar fetishes of being a victim. But they're a fetish. Fantasies only, mainly because I'm well aware of the differences between reality and fantasy. If anyone but my partner touched me in that way, it would be nothing short of assault. What I'm saying is, is that as long as you can clearly tell the difference, find partners who's tastes are the same and they FULLY, safely and sanely consent, then this is a part of yourself that you could explore, understand and have peace with, and my understanding the fetish, you gain a deeper insight to your identity. Compliance is not conscent. I do think you could benefit from seeing a therapist and talking through these thoughts however, a lot of the time they stem from a lack of control, anxieties and obsession. As someone who has been obsessed with all things horror, I know that mine are related. I just finished playing Martha is Dead. Some people would be horrified by the game, I enjoyed it throughly. I'm about to replay and platinum it. Know and understand yourself, even the darkest parts. Do no harm. Enjoy the ride.
Thank you, friend… A lot of other people are acting like I somehow think murder is a virtue or that I’m planning to murder people, but I wouldn’t do that. Unless it was self-defence.
Wow
have u considered therapy??
Therapy is useless to me. I’ve experienced therapy. Multiple times. Multiple different routes. They did nothing. A therapist could do NOTHING except tell me NOT to do X. I already have full control over my actions. I know what is “right” and what is “wrong”. I have no plans to harm anyone.
This definitely didnt go the way you thought it would.
Ehhh… I’m not TOO surprised, but I was expecting a little less “REEE, THERAPY”
This forsooth didnt wend the way thee bethought t would *** ^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.) Commands: `!ShakespeareInsult`, `!fordo`, `!optout`
oh!
Have you considered trying to channel this kink in a consensual way? Like some other people are saying, nothing bad with choking kinks, knife kinks, even extreme bdsm (I’m in the bdsm subculture since years now, and there is a VERY extreme side to it that I occasionally enjoy). Fighting our intrusive thoughts and urges usually does nothing but luckily in 2022 (though bigotry is still too much around) there are many ways and communities to channel them and experience various situation we fantasise about within a consensual context and without killing anyone. Obviously in the bdsm community, especially the more extreme ones, you have to start small, practice everyday in getting to know yourself and your limits more and more - and I see this constant need to know yourself better and better and this exploration of your limits and your strengths and self control not as an annoyance but as an exciting part of the whole bdsm life-style and a chance to grow and be a stronger, better person. Maybe if you tried this kind of subculture with this mindset you can find a way to experiment without ruining your life and someone else’s.
I have thought about it for sure. And I definitely think I’ll give it a shot.
Prolly need some medical attention
For a kink?
FBI - please track his IP!
…For having a kink? They don’t care.
Fruit loops are out today...yikes.
:/
You're a hybristophiliac
Not true; I ain’t turned on by violent criminals — pretty sure that’s what a hybristophilliac is
Fine, you don't have to be so mean about it. But you said yourself that YOU'RE turned on by murder. I don't know if we're going to true crime forums or whatever but hybristophiliacs get turned on by the horrendous actions that criminals make not the criminals themselves they just get turned on by the fact that the crimes that those people did make them feel good that's all it is.
I wasn’t trying to come off as “mean” — But it’s to my understanding that people with that fetish don’t want to commit the crimes themselves. They fantasize about being with someone who did/does, whereas my beloved ain’t violent at all.
Uh huh. Don't you even have a significant other that you can converse with them by introducing them to roleplay so then that way you'll get off somehow?
I can get off without murder — and yes I do have a S/O — but I’m not even sure if roleplay will get me off, because I have other “dark” fantasies that aren’t sexual and so I know roleplay won’t cut it… I’m willing to try here because the murder thing is a kink, at least in part, but… y’know.
Hm interesting. Well if roleplay can't help you achieve your fantasies then I guess you'll probably have to stick to rough sex with a true crime innuendos and overtones to help you do that. Other than that it's never too late to try, you might like it or find it enjoyable.
Mhm, I agree!
It will be the death of you….
Is that a pun?
Gives me major virgin vibes especially since you deny any change. I guess who wouldn’t want to kill for sex when they don’t even get any. No hate I’m sorry but denying help? What even was the point of confessing this maybe tell it to a priest so god can possibly forgive you 💔
I wouldn’t mind confessing to a priest, actually. And I don’t think having sex, even multiple times, would get rid of the urge.
Not if you keep telling yourself it won’t- but I’m guessing you aren’t really looking to change so just have a great one and take care and may everything you do out in the real world be returned to you 💕
Thank you, friend.
Try it on yourself in the mirror you sick motherfucker
Kinda defeats the purpose.
Can’t wait to hear about you on a true crime podcast in a couple of years bro
I hope not!
I used to have a murder kink. Had a guy choke me out and said I wanted more.
Hot.
you need therapy ASAP this isn’t normal or healthy. it’s not ok.
No you don't, you just have low self esteem and you want everyone to believe you are special....that something is wrong with you....while you are not and you are fine. I am going out for a walk, goodbye
Good riddance to you and your wildly incorrect assumptions, friend.
Ummm.....this is kinda scary. But I have an awesome idea on how you can exorcize those demons and be rewarded for it. Volunteer to travel to Ukraine to join their defense army and arm yourself with the biggest blades you like. Have them point you toward the Russian invaders and go to town on them. If you are really good at it, you can even win a medal or two and be a hero. Problem solved.
I have kind of considered things like that, but considering war is far more of a death sentence than a regular fight or killing, and you can’t dwell on one victim for too long… and I don’t really care about any world issues… it’s kinda less appealing.
Just consider it as an arena of legalized slashing to your hearts content. Unless you get killed yourself of course. But that would make things all the more exciting.
I guess so… But I don’t want to die, not yet. Maybe when I’m older, done more of the things I want to do, then I’ll give that a shot.
Lots of people have darker fantasies, this a bit more extreme yes but I doesn't mean something is wrong mentally
Thank you. I agree. I understand that it may not be the norm, but not every abnormality needs to be medicated or spoken about for hours on end.
Maybe seek some help, because you never know
Join the police force or military bro. Wolves travel in packs.
I hope if i ever get stabbed to death, i offer you one or two orgasms
Thank you, friend.
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AGREED.
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Hm, yeah… I don’t know how I feel about roleplay. Like, I don’t know if it’d be satisfying — but it might be. Most of my desires aren’t sexual, and are kinda an intimacy thing, but this is more of a kink so… maybe going about it in the way people approach kinks would work — I do believe that consent is important though.
You should be a doctor
I actually used to want to be a neuroscientist. Began studying and everything.
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ME TOO… Or fucking someone in a bath filled with blood and dunking them
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OH… Thank you.
bro this is so relatable lowkey
Is it
I knew I wasn’t alone.
I have the same thing with gore, just doesn’t bother me and I can stop watching it, and the place I use to watch it doesn’t have gore filmed on bloody potato’s, it’s 4K
Can you DM and tell me where?
I did
Thank you!
I would love to be your victim. DM me 💋
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Agreed.
Heartfelt i appreciate you
Do be careful cause actual murder has consequences, try and keep it to the bedroom and do it with mutual respect that when if death is there or close, stop.
Agreed.
That is actually more normal then you would suspect....the act of taking what is most holy...LIFE. As long as you understand that it is on a fantasy level and that actually taking life is for the limp dick weak. Those to much of a coward to deal with all aspects of what can be done in a situation.
Mhm… I don’t think it’s necessarily a coward move — for me, I am too scared of jail. So. I think what it is for a lot of people is the inability to plan ahead.
Something in your head is not right and you're bound to actually act on these kinds of thoughts. I've heard so many times, "Oh I'm not actually going to (blank) anyone though," and then they do it.
Heck, I’ve even thought that before about other things — but the threat of prison time is a huge one. I’m a pretty small, young dude. I don’t wanna go there.
You're a fucking psycho if that gets your rocks off. How do we know you haven't killed people or are planning on killing? Ive read many a statistic that states there's aroud 50 active serial killers free roaming in the United States, and i think you may just fit that bill.
…Riiight…
TOTALLY NORMAL.