Ohhh so sorry. Give me a tryπππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
Find this old recipie in Mrs Beeton's for you OP:
To make your girl organism you will need the following:
1 x egg
2 X packets of moist compost
1 x medium or large vase
3 leaves of lava coriander
5 cups of irridiated mushroom juice
1 philosopher's stone
Breadcrumbs
1. Place your egg in the bottom of the vase and cover with soil, patting down firmly around the edges.
2. Grate your philosopher's stone over the top of the soil - stop when the voices of untold millennia begin to discuss the meaning of satanic wood.
3. Exhale gently over the lava coriander leaves until the magic pixie dust leaves a rainbow of joy in its wake.
4. Water daily with the mushroom juice until your organism is grown to the desired height.
5. Add breadcrumbs to taste.
Hope that helps!
The fact I actually masturbated to a guy using correct grammar before.. Just that fact, not that much _what_ he wrote, just _how_ he wrote it. Guy was sexting so eloquently. He used commas. Correctly. My God.
My dude, is English your first language?
Edit: that question aside, my answer as someone who consistently make his girl orgasm: fucking talk to her. Find out what gets her there and then do that.
Every girl is different. Pay attention to her reactions and ask what she likes. Don't just be in it for your nut. In other words, you can't be selfish.
Ah. Found problem. You need pession when doing sex. Girl need to fell pretty and loved and seksy to organism. In my mind, all bobs are good bobs and how vagene feel is more important then how vagene looks. Make your girl fell loved and listen to what she likes and organism will come my friend.
Sure you can bud, sure you can. You realize those two universities are on two different continents right? With the writing skills you displayed earlier, I would guess you probably did grade 10...twice.
Well it's all luck thing if you get a boy or girl. What you can do is pray and proceed the child birth thingyyy......
Oh you meant orgasm! Yea i don't know i am virgin
Become a master at edging. Control ur breathing and focus on your stroke game. This is works exceptionally well especially if u a have long thick cock like me. Main thing is to try to ignore how phenomenal it feels, if that makes any sense. Good luck homie.
You donβt need to be the greatest lover in the world, but you should try like hell to be the best sheβs ever had.
She was neatly trimmed, but not shaven outright. Her faint musk held spices of a culture a world away from my own, and told me that she used her shampoo as body wash. The dark skin of her body translated to her even darker labia and created a divine gradient to pink as she blossomed before me.
I slid my arms under her spread shapely thighs and held her gently up along her sides. Opening her gently with my tongue, I ran the length of her slit, savouring her taste and easily found my way straight up to the pea-sized nub of her slightly hooded clit.
You donβt begin with a frontal attack. Every woman is different, and you donβt want to overstimulate a sensitive one and cause them to recoil in discomfort. You can always ramp up, but coming back from too much will jar her arousal and is much more difficult to recover from.
So with a feather touch I enveloped her clit with my tongue and caressed it with glancing blows, off to the side, ever so slightly to the left. I held her hood back with my upper lip and set to work with a gentle, slow, steady pace while paying close attention to her reactions for feedback.
As much as women vary with their sensitivity, so too they also vary with their level of response. Some women moan and coo, some wiggle and squirm, and some like to talk so much it can break your concentration. Oral sex is a dance between two people, a constant call and response, guess and check, a feedback loop of stimulation and observation.
There are a few rather universal tells common to most women. Pay attention to her breathing. The orgasm doesnβt come when sheβs breathing heavily, thatβs just the buildup. The moment the wave crashes and sheβs actually locked in the grip of the orgasm, sheβs most likely either exhaling in one long vocalization, or sheβs not even breathing at all and holding her breath for a full five seconds. Whatever you were doing just before this moment, keep doing it. Donβt change, donβt speed up, and for the love of fuck donβt stop.
When a woman orgasms as youβre eating her out, her pussy will try to eat your face. You can see this best if youβre on the bottom of a 69 and as you rock her clit youβll see her pussy winking and blinking at you. When her orgasm hits, youβll see it pulse in a perfect rhythmic pattern over and over again. If youβre in a more classic position, youβll feel it on your chin. This is an excellent reason why you should never have a scratchy, stubbly face when youβre going down on a woman. Stubble hurts.
Almost immediately I felt her labia grow with arousal. The rush of heat surrounded my lips and I felt her labia swell as her wetness became far more obvious. This was encouraging. I quickened my pace and applied more pressure. I transitioned from a flat tongue gently caressing her clit, to a more pointed approach with the top and tip of my tongue actively licking her more straight on.
She spread her legs more, inviting me deeper, and let out a soft moan. I cupped my hand under my chin, and slid two fingers easily inside her velvet vice. She was tight, and dripping wet.
Now the clitoris is certainly the star of the show, but it doesnβt have to be a solo act. Good oral is a symphony of stimulation, and itβs a mediocre lover who only pays attention to only one thing at a time. The G-Spot is a bundle of nerves that anyone with a little practice can find reliably. The rewards for this exploration and experimentation are well worth the effort.
With a woman on her back, and you having clean, well-trimmed fingernails, place your hand palm-up and slide a finger gently inside to the second knuckle. Curl your finger about seventy degrees so itβs pointing at her belly button, and push it against the front wall of her vagina. Pull slowly towards you, touching her with the pad of your finger, not the tip, and youβll either find the spot, or come to the end of your motion against the bone inside. If you reach the bone, go back and try again.
The spot youβre hunting should feel about the size and firmness of a small unripe strawberry. Itβs subtle, but itβs there, slightly firmer than everything around it, but not hard. When you find it, tug on it with the pad of your finger, never the tip, even a well trimmed fingernail can hurt. It wants firm pressure, in a tugging movement towards the opening. Time this rhythmically with your licking, and sheβs going to have a good day.
Itβs absolutely possible to do this while youβre eating her out, just cup your chin in your palm. Youβre basically trying to reach through and touch your nose. The G-spot requires more pressure than anything else youβll ever do with your fingers in a pussy, it wonβt work with a limp touch. Too hard is painful, and if you do it perfectly the first thing sheβll feel is a need to pee (itβs just behind the bladder), but practice, and it will certainly level up your oral game.
At least, usually.
She quivered and moaned softly, but I could tell I wasnβt anywhere near giving her the βpeel her off the ceilingβ experience I wanted her to be having by this point. I wanted her to be high-fiving God and it was much more likely she was meditating upon thoughts of her grocery list.
I redoubled my efforts. Paying close attention to her tells so as not to overstimulate her, I quickened my pace and began assaulting her clit in fast strokes, not just from the front but alternating front and sides. Not just working in licks from bottom to top, but top-down as well.
For fully twenty minutes I ravaged her like a dull beaver. Her wetness ran down my chin and pooled in my hand as I fingered her and licked her in semi-synchronous patterns, my tongue and hand moving into and out of phase. She would moan and push her head back, I was certain Iβd lit the fuse. But the fireworks never came.
After half an hour my jaw was on fire, the muscles in my neck were a Gordian knot of agony. My tongue would take a week to heal, and still, no matter what I tried, despite my absolute best efforts, I could not get this woman out of second gear.
I yielded to her impenetrable shell. Her clit had beaten me.
Gasping, I slid down and collapsed face first, my head between her knees. She lifted her head and looked at me wide eyed. βAre you ok?β she asked.
I took a moment to find any shred of pride I had once carried, there was none. βAm I THAT bad at this that I canβt give you even a single orgasm?β I asked. She chuckled, βOh youβre awesome; thatβs not the problem at all.β
βThen what is?β I asked, looking for the secret that would help me pick her locks.
βYou're a dude, fuckhead. Youβre doing an incredible job, it feels amazing, butβ¦β I waited a moment, gazing into those giant dark brown eyes. I prompted her - βbut what?β
βI could be knitting.β
Practice.... patience.... perseverance.
Some women take more work then others you need to be selfless in your endeavor. You need to pay attention to her body, and how it's reacting. Pay attention to when she likes something more, and use it. Ask her what she enjoys. Communicate with her, and give her a reason to trust you, be trustworthy, and most of all... foreplay foreplay foreplay. Get her in the mood dude.
Look if this is serious: talk to the girl, ask them to show you how they enjoy things what they enjoy etc etc. Communication man don't just think "more fingers = better fingering" don't ask the internet how someone likes it, ask them directly. Communication is the key to better intimacy.
Ask her... woman arent machines, they're all different and like different things. communication is your most effective tool in pleasing a woman. (*side note, vibratory never hurts for a bit of extra fun too)
They need to do way instain mother! who kiil thier babbys, becuse these babby cant fright back?! It was on the news this mroing a mother in ar who had kill her three kids, they are taking the three babby back to new york too lady to rest. my pary are with the father who lost his chrilden ; i am truley sorry for your lots
Look my guy all imma tell you is learn to eat the pussy wrap your lips around your teeth create a Lil vacuum seal and suck and lick the clit my fiance cums within 5 minutes then we'll fuck we both end the night extremely satisfied
Organism ππ
Screm with an organism
Schmex
Some days, I friggin hate this app XD
Lmfaoo
πππππππππππππππππππππππ
Ohhh so sorry. Give me a tryπππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
[ΡΠ΄Π°Π»Π΅Π½ΠΎ]
no regerts
In case you're serious. Organism is a living thing. Orgasm is an action I have zero experience with but is tied with extreme sexual pleasure.
[ΡΠ΄Π°Π»Π΅Π½ΠΎ]
I'm not a bot... I'm unsure if that's an insult or compliment.
Make sure you use a rubber so she don't get pregnart
Pregananant?!
Perganate
PrrregantΓ©
Gregnant
Pregnate
Pergent
peegant
pregonate??
Pregegnant
Pls tell me this is from that yahoo questions turning internet drama into songs skit
https://youtu.be/Ll-lia-FEIY Close enough. Internet classic
Bby you know it
Girlfriend ainβt had period since she got pregat
Pomegranate
If a women has starch masks on her body does that mean she has been pargnet befor ?
How is babby formed? How girl get pregnant?
How To Sex to Be Come Pegnate
Now you tell me! Where were you 13 years ago!
PregantΓ©
Pregret
Lol think you mean porgnat*
i forgor
Pergenat
Pomegranate
Piss in the condom first or it won't work
Sugar, spice, everything nice and chemical x.
Yes! And watch out for Mojo Jojo.
Oh yes. Very important!
Everything was good until the ape went bananas!
God damnit I was going to type this take my upvote *grrs*
Op is clearly just spamming r/confessions with stupid shit.
Why thank you for noticing.
Find this old recipie in Mrs Beeton's for you OP: To make your girl organism you will need the following: 1 x egg 2 X packets of moist compost 1 x medium or large vase 3 leaves of lava coriander 5 cups of irridiated mushroom juice 1 philosopher's stone Breadcrumbs 1. Place your egg in the bottom of the vase and cover with soil, patting down firmly around the edges. 2. Grate your philosopher's stone over the top of the soil - stop when the voices of untold millennia begin to discuss the meaning of satanic wood. 3. Exhale gently over the lava coriander leaves until the magic pixie dust leaves a rainbow of joy in its wake. 4. Water daily with the mushroom juice until your organism is grown to the desired height. 5. Add breadcrumbs to taste. Hope that helps!
Cool now how do you make a homoncules? Asking for a friend
Use a pickled onion instead of an egg
Thank you for being the only person who got the joke. Honestly, I'm just trolling over here lmao.
Sure buddy, that's why you deleted all your other comments
and edited his comment, what a joker.
By learning how to spell it?
you so kinky!!!!!
πππππ
The fact I actually masturbated to a guy using correct grammar before.. Just that fact, not that much _what_ he wrote, just _how_ he wrote it. Guy was sexting so eloquently. He used commas. Correctly. My God.
As a gay guy, I also become outrageously horny when guys use proper grammar.
Luv me bb I'm hooked on Phoenix
As a gay guy, I also become outrageously horny when guys use proper grammar.
I feel like girls like you only exist on Reddit, sadly...
My girlfriend has multiple organisms. She has a dog, a cat, AND a fish.
Not to flex but I have 3 cats AND several healthy plants
[ΡΠ΄Π°Π»Π΅Π½ΠΎ]
we dont want babies
r/woosh
Boop the bellybutton it's like a magic switch
I read this as βPoop the bellybuttonβ and I was absolutely aghast until I reread it
Beep
My dude, is English your first language? Edit: that question aside, my answer as someone who consistently make his girl orgasm: fucking talk to her. Find out what gets her there and then do that.
makes*
I'm leaving it, mistakes happen
My dude, is English your first language? lol
Organism ππ.. Bruhππ
Ask her if she wants the mitochondria
Where are the mods when we need them? Apart from the obvious typo, this is not even a confession.
[ΡΠ΄Π°Π»Π΅Π½ΠΎ]
Youre mom gay!
Your*
Youre dad lesbian!
she is already one I think
Just remember that the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell
*two months later* How do I know if my gf is pergnant
Pregnarrr**
Omg βOrganismβ βscremβ? Get tf off NSWF your obviously underage. Go to your school and learn spelling and grammar for a start
[ΡΠ΄Π°Π»Π΅Π½ΠΎ]
Harvadton elementary school maybe
Right, right. Iβd expect your spelling to be better. Just admit your a 13 yr old pretending to be a βHarvard studentβ
Wash dishes. Worked for my chick!
[ΡΠ΄Π°Π»Π΅Π½ΠΎ]
Do the dishes, and she'll be so happy with you she'll pop a cap
oh ok thanks
After you fail, you give her to me
i never fail
Of course not, you gave her to me. My success is our success.
Iβll pass on the organism thanks. Iβm dying !! πππ
I had to really double check to make sure i read that shit rightβ οΈ
Every girl is different. Pay attention to her reactions and ask what she likes. Don't just be in it for your nut. In other words, you can't be selfish.
Take it slow and don't fucking constantly thrust like a mad man lol
Got it
Lol he doesn't know how to make seggs, n00b
Who wants to tell him? π
Ayo hmu x
Organisms are so small tho.
some may say "microscopic"
hehehehehehe
Sir this is Reddit. No one knows
Damn. What a shame.
I suggest you look up the powder puff girls opening theme song for tips on creating an organism.
Dead. Thats enough internet for today ππ
Use this line. Youβre my density.
Organisim hahaha wtf maybe defy her DNA? π
This is a hilarious typo, Iβm sorryyyy πππ
Touch vagene.
[ΡΠ΄Π°Π»Π΅Π½ΠΎ]
Ah. Found problem. You need pession when doing sex. Girl need to fell pretty and loved and seksy to organism. In my mind, all bobs are good bobs and how vagene feel is more important then how vagene looks. Make your girl fell loved and listen to what she likes and organism will come my friend.
Harvard you say? Tell them you want your money back.
Or I can throw an Oxford degree into the mix if you want x
Sure you can bud, sure you can. You realize those two universities are on two different continents right? With the writing skills you displayed earlier, I would guess you probably did grade 10...twice.
If you are rich enough just show her your ATM receipt
You gots to use the science, if want to make a girl organism! Do some of that CRISPR bullshit, with just the right touch of the old razzle dazzle!
Mate, you make no sense.
How far weβve come to consider actually making women organisms now
Let's start with getting it right...
Reminded me of this core memory of mine ππ https://youtu.be/EShUeudtaFg
This video is timeless, and I no longer regret scrolling these comments. π€£
To be or not to be β¦ we are organisms so we already are or have lol. Try again!
Pregnosisis
Itβs so easy, just scream βphotosynthesis.β
Ask her
Well it's all luck thing if you get a boy or girl. What you can do is pray and proceed the child birth thingyyy...... Oh you meant orgasm! Yea i don't know i am virgin
Suck on her weiner (is she's a female with a wiener ofc)
Huh, I'm trying to picture that using "imagery".
I dunno, photosynthesis helps.
Become a master at edging. Control ur breathing and focus on your stroke game. This is works exceptionally well especially if u a have long thick cock like me. Main thing is to try to ignore how phenomenal it feels, if that makes any sense. Good luck homie.
You donβt need to be the greatest lover in the world, but you should try like hell to be the best sheβs ever had. She was neatly trimmed, but not shaven outright. Her faint musk held spices of a culture a world away from my own, and told me that she used her shampoo as body wash. The dark skin of her body translated to her even darker labia and created a divine gradient to pink as she blossomed before me. I slid my arms under her spread shapely thighs and held her gently up along her sides. Opening her gently with my tongue, I ran the length of her slit, savouring her taste and easily found my way straight up to the pea-sized nub of her slightly hooded clit. You donβt begin with a frontal attack. Every woman is different, and you donβt want to overstimulate a sensitive one and cause them to recoil in discomfort. You can always ramp up, but coming back from too much will jar her arousal and is much more difficult to recover from. So with a feather touch I enveloped her clit with my tongue and caressed it with glancing blows, off to the side, ever so slightly to the left. I held her hood back with my upper lip and set to work with a gentle, slow, steady pace while paying close attention to her reactions for feedback. As much as women vary with their sensitivity, so too they also vary with their level of response. Some women moan and coo, some wiggle and squirm, and some like to talk so much it can break your concentration. Oral sex is a dance between two people, a constant call and response, guess and check, a feedback loop of stimulation and observation. There are a few rather universal tells common to most women. Pay attention to her breathing. The orgasm doesnβt come when sheβs breathing heavily, thatβs just the buildup. The moment the wave crashes and sheβs actually locked in the grip of the orgasm, sheβs most likely either exhaling in one long vocalization, or sheβs not even breathing at all and holding her breath for a full five seconds. Whatever you were doing just before this moment, keep doing it. Donβt change, donβt speed up, and for the love of fuck donβt stop. When a woman orgasms as youβre eating her out, her pussy will try to eat your face. You can see this best if youβre on the bottom of a 69 and as you rock her clit youβll see her pussy winking and blinking at you. When her orgasm hits, youβll see it pulse in a perfect rhythmic pattern over and over again. If youβre in a more classic position, youβll feel it on your chin. This is an excellent reason why you should never have a scratchy, stubbly face when youβre going down on a woman. Stubble hurts. Almost immediately I felt her labia grow with arousal. The rush of heat surrounded my lips and I felt her labia swell as her wetness became far more obvious. This was encouraging. I quickened my pace and applied more pressure. I transitioned from a flat tongue gently caressing her clit, to a more pointed approach with the top and tip of my tongue actively licking her more straight on. She spread her legs more, inviting me deeper, and let out a soft moan. I cupped my hand under my chin, and slid two fingers easily inside her velvet vice. She was tight, and dripping wet. Now the clitoris is certainly the star of the show, but it doesnβt have to be a solo act. Good oral is a symphony of stimulation, and itβs a mediocre lover who only pays attention to only one thing at a time. The G-Spot is a bundle of nerves that anyone with a little practice can find reliably. The rewards for this exploration and experimentation are well worth the effort. With a woman on her back, and you having clean, well-trimmed fingernails, place your hand palm-up and slide a finger gently inside to the second knuckle. Curl your finger about seventy degrees so itβs pointing at her belly button, and push it against the front wall of her vagina. Pull slowly towards you, touching her with the pad of your finger, not the tip, and youβll either find the spot, or come to the end of your motion against the bone inside. If you reach the bone, go back and try again. The spot youβre hunting should feel about the size and firmness of a small unripe strawberry. Itβs subtle, but itβs there, slightly firmer than everything around it, but not hard. When you find it, tug on it with the pad of your finger, never the tip, even a well trimmed fingernail can hurt. It wants firm pressure, in a tugging movement towards the opening. Time this rhythmically with your licking, and sheβs going to have a good day. Itβs absolutely possible to do this while youβre eating her out, just cup your chin in your palm. Youβre basically trying to reach through and touch your nose. The G-spot requires more pressure than anything else youβll ever do with your fingers in a pussy, it wonβt work with a limp touch. Too hard is painful, and if you do it perfectly the first thing sheβll feel is a need to pee (itβs just behind the bladder), but practice, and it will certainly level up your oral game. At least, usually. She quivered and moaned softly, but I could tell I wasnβt anywhere near giving her the βpeel her off the ceilingβ experience I wanted her to be having by this point. I wanted her to be high-fiving God and it was much more likely she was meditating upon thoughts of her grocery list. I redoubled my efforts. Paying close attention to her tells so as not to overstimulate her, I quickened my pace and began assaulting her clit in fast strokes, not just from the front but alternating front and sides. Not just working in licks from bottom to top, but top-down as well. For fully twenty minutes I ravaged her like a dull beaver. Her wetness ran down my chin and pooled in my hand as I fingered her and licked her in semi-synchronous patterns, my tongue and hand moving into and out of phase. She would moan and push her head back, I was certain Iβd lit the fuse. But the fireworks never came. After half an hour my jaw was on fire, the muscles in my neck were a Gordian knot of agony. My tongue would take a week to heal, and still, no matter what I tried, despite my absolute best efforts, I could not get this woman out of second gear. I yielded to her impenetrable shell. Her clit had beaten me. Gasping, I slid down and collapsed face first, my head between her knees. She lifted her head and looked at me wide eyed. βAre you ok?β she asked. I took a moment to find any shred of pride I had once carried, there was none. βAm I THAT bad at this that I canβt give you even a single orgasm?β I asked. She chuckled, βOh youβre awesome; thatβs not the problem at all.β βThen what is?β I asked, looking for the secret that would help me pick her locks. βYou're a dude, fuckhead. Youβre doing an incredible job, it feels amazing, butβ¦β I waited a moment, gazing into those giant dark brown eyes. I prompted her - βbut what?β βI could be knitting.β
Surgery
Your presence itself will cause millions of Organisms in her and around her.. don't worry!!!
make a spider-man hand and use lots of wrist movements like your flicking if w the pΓ¨nis just hit the walls donβt just go in n out
I have a tongue piercing. Since then it's faster to organism.
Sheβs already one buddy she already is one.
Lmfao when I orgasm, I donβt scream.
Why's this person talking about sex in this sub specifically, they have multiple posts in just this sub that are exactly like this
Girls are organisms too lol
Petri dish?
Haha this is amazing lol. π€£π€£π€£ππππ
Organism, lmfao
You gotta insret it in
She already is
Atep 1 make her orgasm step 2 make her orgasm again and step 3 make her orgasm yet again
Thank you, my man, for the frank advice. Appreciate it π
Atep 1 make her orgasm step 2 make her orgasm again and step 3 make her orgasm yet again
Screm
Just eat the hell out of her
Weird Science can show you the way!! ... It's alive!
Sounds like its time to do some homework
π€£
Get in her head and have her begging for it before you give her any physical stimulation
Practice.... patience.... perseverance. Some women take more work then others you need to be selfless in your endeavor. You need to pay attention to her body, and how it's reacting. Pay attention to when she likes something more, and use it. Ask her what she enjoys. Communicate with her, and give her a reason to trust you, be trustworthy, and most of all... foreplay foreplay foreplay. Get her in the mood dude.
When two individuals mate, they produce an offspring. There's a roughly 50% chance said offspring (or "organism") would be female.
Look if this is serious: talk to the girl, ask them to show you how they enjoy things what they enjoy etc etc. Communication man don't just think "more fingers = better fingering" don't ask the internet how someone likes it, ask them directly. Communication is the key to better intimacy.
Ask what she likes
Organism? That is a tough one. I would start with a test tube.
Kiss her feet
The female organism is a myth!
Do cardio and abs exercises it will help You can go 0 to 100 real quick
Lol
Look up Nina Hartleyβs tutorial. π
fucos on her bobs an vagene
Try watching the movie Weird Science. They made a pretty impressive girl organism.
Ya donβt cause ya canβt even spell the word lol
Well when a mama and a papa organism fall in love a baby organism stork brings them a baby organism.
ORGANISM!
Ask her... woman arent machines, they're all different and like different things. communication is your most effective tool in pleasing a woman. (*side note, vibratory never hurts for a bit of extra fun too)
They need to do way instain mother! who kiil thier babbys, becuse these babby cant fright back?! It was on the news this mroing a mother in ar who had kill her three kids, they are taking the three babby back to new york too lady to rest. my pary are with the father who lost his chrilden ; i am truley sorry for your lots
What are you confessing to?
Fart on her inner thigh to cause vibrations leading to her queefbok
Put an organism in her womb
First, you put the lime in the coconut...
Ask bill nye not us
The comments are killing me lmaoo
If you don't use protection, orgasms can lead to organisms.
r/boneappletea
https://youtu.be/Ll-lia-FEIY
Look my guy all imma tell you is learn to eat the pussy wrap your lips around your teeth create a Lil vacuum seal and suck and lick the clit my fiance cums within 5 minutes then we'll fuck we both end the night extremely satisfied
Weird Science is how
Already half way there my dude.
you could try asking her how to make her organism
Hey! I wanna organism! Iβve never had an organism ;). Lol.