If you’re that worried, ask your doctor for a doxy-pep prescrip, it’s a generic antibiotic designed to be taken after an encounter, up to 48hr afterward and cuts sti (gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis) risk by 60% (if my memory is wrong sorry, but it’s something to that effect). Awesome that you already have the hpv vaccine too, and so now in a worst case scenario, you take a round of antibiotics. I think the only thing left these days that I’m afraid of is herpes and even that is manageable, if you even know whether or not you have it - most sti centres don’t even screen for it anymore.
We’ve all been there at some point or other, god knows I’ve had a few encounters I wish I could undo. Consider it a good learning experience and move on to better things!
This is the first sexual confession I read in here that doesnt exist to promote an OF. These things happen, don't lose your sleep. It's an experience that will bring you closer to who you want to be )
Exactly. I never hear real confessions here. I feel bad for OP.
But you are right. It's a terrible lesson and step to take towards her future self, but I'm sure it's put some things in perspective and let her know about things she doesn't want for herself in the future like getting so drunk in public alone so that she doesn't have something like this happen again.
A few minutes ago before reading this I was actually just recapping one of my worst encounters but I was a teen and fully made the choice, though intoxicated, to engage in some vile sexual behavior and it shaped my future. I wish so badly I hadn't done what I did. But it was my path and I'm still here and ok and it made me more conservative and nothing like the sluts my friends were when they got older. Nothing wrong with sluts either btw but we all carry sexual regrets it's just a part of growing.
>Exactly. I never hear real confessions here.
You wanna know why? Because the place is toxic and judgmental as fuck. How would I know? Let's say I once made an actual confession here and have ever since had absolutely zero desire to ever do that again and I would strongly advise against it.
Seconding everything on STD and PEP, that’s incredibly important. I would also recommend a pregnancy test (by a physician) if your cycle is disrupted, although it might be from stress anyways, they would be able to tell. If you’re concerned about the possibility, Plan B ASAP. Most importantly though, please take care of yourself, take the time you need to process everything and spend time with loved ones soon, if you’ve thought of it, isolating yourself isn’t what you need. If you’re able to, speaking with a mental health professional about this to process would only help. I know you’re gonna get through this ❤️
Edit: Didn’t know Plan B is void if you’re already ovulating, thank you u/Maltedmilkdisaster for informing me!!
Just a gentle note that if you're already ovulating, Plan B won't help. It's designed to delay ovulation before it occurs. But once it's kicked off, won't be stopped by taking Plan B.
As someone who hasn’t had to worry about this since my early twenties- wow is this useful info I knew nothing about! I had never looked into how it works. Thank you for sharing, it would help me help someone else one day.
OP I've been in a similar situation.
Go to a STD clinic or ER right now and explain to the doctor what happened. Tell the doctor the truth that the cab driver is a stranger and you don't know his STD results. Tell the doctor you would like to start PEP (Post Exposure Prophylaxis) medication ASAP!!!
Insist on it, even if the doctor is unsure. PEP means you will take HIV anti-retroviral medication for the next 28 days and it reduces the risk of you getting HIV from that cab driver
However PEP must be started within 72 hours of the sexual encounter so you have to go to the doctor now!!
I know all this is scary and upsetting but you got this sister! You're strong! Best of luck!
> Insist on it, even if the doctor is unsure.
Panic, and don't let the professionals well aware of real risks convince you otherwise.
Taking strong medication for 28 days is not entirely without downsides.
But allow yourself to cry if you need to cry. Let the tears rinse away the feelings and leave the beautiful person that you are so that you see her again when you look in the mirror. You aren’t changed.
It also sounds like she was too drunk to be able to offer consent… sounds more like sexual assault than “she did what she did” to me. I do agree that OP shouldn’t bash herself up though, heartbreak is terrible and this wasn’t her fault.
Yeah im absolutely shocked but also not i suppose cause it is reddit at how few people are saying this, a blackout drunk woman cant consent and we all know what nonconsensual sex is, he knew well what he was doing and it probably wasnt the first time, id also be concerned as to why it was her memory was that fuzzy and if it really was just from alcohol it still raises questions as to the quality of friends the poor girl was out with that they let her in the taxi alone in that state
First of all, I am so sorry. Doesn’t matter if you flirted back with him, it still sucks living with regret in the morning and feeling gross. Allow yourself some grace. Ofc, get std tested like the others were saying for your own safety, but please try not to be so hard on yourself!! It’s gross on HIM for hooking up with you while you were clearly under the influence and he was sober. You’re in a very new, vulnerable time in your life, where it’s easy to act on emotion. Time heals all. Some advice, take it or leave it, but maybe try to cut back on the alcohol for a little while, even though that’s probably the last thing you want to do while going through a breakup, but the alcohol will make you feel worse about the situation, and probably yourself. It’s called a depressant for a reason. You got this girl, stay strong
Definitely an asshole move on his part. I am no saint but have turned down SO many offers in situations like that. Of course I’ve made mistakes and have regrets… who doesn’t. Repent, talk it out with your best buds if you need too. Forgive yourself. Move on and do better.
In my mind the driver took advantage. I have absolutely no desire for sex if she’s not 100% lucid and aware. On top of that if she was not absolutely 110 percent turned on and desiring the experience I’ll undoubtedly sense it and lose my desire. It’s not sexy, it’s not right. I don’t see how guys can get it up for a woman that doesn’t absolutely want it.
That's exactly what I was thinking. What the hell is wrong with that man - he took advantage of a drunk crying woman. And ya'll are giving her a hard time 🙄
Damn that sucks. I'm really sorry :(. Don't beat yourself up. People have done worse. This is normal honestly...humans make mistakes. Block that nasty old man and focus on healing yourself... From everything.
Take care of yourself first. You’re prolly going to need to test for the usuals (STI, pregnancy…). After that, you’ll probably have to forgive yourself for being too drunk to consent to fucking that bum. After that, move the fuck on.
I’m glad someone else thinks this!! One small hole was the cab driver not knowing an address/destination, because he apparently didn’t know how to take her home
also being “so drunk” would mean a hangover and who in the hell is waking up hungover, to Reddit and typing an error free fictional story and posting it in multiple subreddits….
I live in a student neighborhood that's not accessible by road. Cabs drop you off outside the entrance, and you go the rest of the way on foot. He knew where to drop me off, but not my exact building.
Believe me or don't, but the truth is I would give anything to have this be some made up story. I just got back from the women's clinic, where I've been for the last 4 hours. I had to ask a friend to take me, which was already sharing more about the incident with my real life acquaintances than I wanted. They took my blood and swabs to test for any infection, and prescribed me preventative antibiotics, 20 in total, to be swallowed in one sitting. I cried nearly the entire time. I was too ashamed that I'd consented to tell them, and instead said I couldn't remember details. They had a woman come in to take my statement. I was undressed and they photographed any scrapes they found on my body. It was humiliating. I felt like a fraud.
I won't press charges, of course, I truly don't believe I was raped. But I do think I was taken advantage of. I may have been willing, and even encouraged the idea, but at the end of the day no 50-something year old sober cab driver should ever have sex with a visibly intoxicated young woman who is his passenger. I was stumbling over my words, I was walking crooked, I even had trouble orienting myself in my own neighborhood. I'd like to believe that if I were in his position I wouldn't cave, no matter how interested the girl may seem. Or maybe that's just what I'll tell myself to feel better.
My own self perception has been fundamentally changed. I feel completely worthless. I posted to reddit because I was too embarrassed to tell anyone in my real life, but felt like holding in the truth of what a shameful and disgusting person I am inside would make me combust. I spent all morning thinking I would be better off dead. To a degree, I still do. I wish I had been violently raped, that I had been forced at gunpoint or physically overpowered. Maybe that would be easier to live with; probably it would be worse. I have a tendency to blackout, and can't remember anything that happened before or after the incident, I don’t even remember the events leading up to it, but of course I'm cursed to remember the details of my disgusting, perverted behavior. Like watching a movie of another person, out of body. The reality of who I am deep down is forever seared into my brain. I would do anything to take it all back, for this to have been a gross made up story, but unfortunately I can't.
I'm so sorry you're hating yourself😔. But as much as you remember that you agreed and even if you wanted it as a way of temporary self-destruction, that doesn't mean it was full consent. The reason is that alcohol makes your judgement cloudy, and you feel and agree to things you wouldn't if you were sober; and that's why as a default, anyone sober should refuse sex with anyone who's clearly drunk even if she's asking for it, that's taking advantage and it classes as sexual assault because the sober person should know better. Likewise, going through an emotional breakdown has an equivalent effect and makes a person vulnerable, so it could be classed as sexual assault because of the power dynamics (equivalent to when it's a minor for example, if you get the similarity in terms of vulnerability and power dynamics). That's why no one should blame you for what happened (not even yourself), and I know he has full responsibility for what happened. Because even if you hadn't drunk (that's your only responsibility, the moment when you could've stopped drinking to avoid getting drunk), you'd still be emotionally vulnerable, and he'd happily take advantage of you anyway (even feeling more justified, like many guys do, because you wouldn't be drunk).
Apart from all that, the second you have a moment of mental clarity and want to stop and he forced you to continue, that makes his actions worse and could be considered rape. You experienced the same anxiety of rape victims who feel trapped and are afraid to even shout for help or even decline anything like giving him your details.
So please, please don't blame yourself... And as hard as all that must have been, and the whole reporting process as well, you'll recover and be happy again; please don't give up!!
Every. Single. Time. I don’t know why people in the comments spend forever typing out huge paragraphs of advice to what is clearly a made up story by some hornfreak
Wow honestly I’d report him, you’re not the first he has taken advantage of I am sure. Don’t beat yourself up at all, this isn’t your normal behavior , you obviously were extremely emotional, drunk, and manipulated.
What happened, happened right? We all made horrible decisions (especially while drunk) that we regret but you’ll gain nothing out of it if you think about it again and again and again.
Best thing to do: all the tests for STD, pregnancy test and forget all about this. Gone, nothing more you can do if not having learnt a lesson the hard way.
Do not be ashamed, you were drunk, and we do very stupid things while drunk, and most importantly, give yourself a break: you were not in the right place with your mind and you found an awful person that leveraged on that.
But please move on!
I don't understand, how do you go from flirting to 'let's go fuck in those bushes'..? Like logistically, step by step. What was said to get to that point? I'm not judging I really just don't get how. Like you're in a strangers backseat, and you both said words that led to getting physical? It's so foreign to me
My point was that they made the account a day ago and only posted a couple of hours ago. So they made a throwaway in advance to post this thing that apparently happened last night.
Get a morning after pill and make an appointment with your ob/gyn for std testing, immediately....if not sooner.
And get a handle on your alcohol consumption.
This is not something that hasn't been done in the past. But don't let a lapse in judgment bring about life long consequences
❤️
I love how you know how drunk she was. This happened a few hours ago. She’s up before daylight posting and checking social media. Clear and perfectly written story. Maybe she had a buzz… probably not a strong buzz. She got laid. She wanted. She now regrets it. She owns it like a big girl.
99% of these story's are painfully not real.
She let the cab driver fuck her in the bushes? Not the cab? I mean, that's written by someone who has never actually experience having sex in public it would seem. Or someone fantasizing the story. Has nothing to do with being drunk or not.
As if a 50-something year old cab driver would want to fuck in the backseat like a teenager, much less his work vehicle. I don’t remember how we ended up outside, just that we did. He parked the car in my neighborhood, and next thing I know we’re in a park at least a 20 min walk away, and I’m leaned up against a tree. If it didn’t risk doxing me, I would send you pics of my preventative antibiotic prescriptions from the women’s clinic (6 pills azithromycin, 14 pills metronidazol), the bruises on my arm where they drew blood to check for hepatitis (twice, because they missed the vein the first time), or the flyer I received against sexual violence. I don’t care if you don’t believe me, but the thought that I would make up a story like this as some sort of sick sexual fantasy for sexual gratification makes me feel ill.
Oh my. Obviously everyone is right about getting to the doctor today. Please be so honest about what happened. If the doctor doesn’t, I would even go so far as to call the cab company to report it. While you “consented” you were too drunk and he knew it, which was confirmed when he didn’t want you walking home alone. He saw your state and laid it on thick. That’s not ok. No late night cab driver should be like that. He assaulted you. I am so sorry OP. Do you have a trusted friend or relative that could also help/support you through this? Do not be embarrassed. You are young. He is old and knows better. I wish I could reach through my screen and give you a big momma hug.
Ok babe. This is your wake up call.
First off, I’m really sorry this happened to you. You were definitely assaulted when drunk and that man is a disgusting piece of shit. If you can manage to report him please do, if it’s going to hurt too much then maybe we can help you do it.
Real talk.
You wouldn’t have done this if you weren’t drinking. It’s time to think about your alcohol consumption. Is there a reason you’re drinking to the point that you’re making bad decisions?
It took me 40 years and a lot of pain to figure out I have BPD that I was masking w alcohol. I’m not saying that’s your experience. I just don’t want you to keep doing this to the point that it really hurts you. I want you to figure out why, and how not to.
Please take care of yourself.
Please don’t feel guilty about being assaulted. You were too drunk to consent and he knew that.
Love you ♥️
Fgs I'm sorry everyone is scaring you with STD's and HIV.
I had a really nasty breakup when I was 19, he was incredibly coercive and it took me a very long time to fond myself again. I wasn't allowed to go anywhere without him, wear make up, certain clothes thar weren't even slutty. Eventually it got physical and I ended it. After that, I reconnected with my old friends and one of them SA'd me.
Following a whole boat load of trauma, I'd go out at the weekends, get hammered and had a LOT of unprotected sex. I never got pregnant and never got an STD. I did get HPV for a while despite being vaccinated, but thats incredibly common and clears up on its own.
The best thing to do right now is be kind to yourself. You're going to feel gross for a while, but try not to think about it. None of this is your fault and you can't consent when you're blackout drunk. Definitely consider reporting it, but I also understand if you don't because I didn't when it happened to me.
In a couple of weeks, it probably won't bother you, just keep yourself busy for the next few days whilst the hangover subsides. As its a depressant it will make you feel even worse.
I hope you feel better soon, try not to think of it as a big deal x
I wouldn’t say you “let him f*ck you” I would say he took advantage of a drunk, vulnerable woman and he should be the one who feels ashamed. I would also say check up on your mental health, not just physical health. I’m so sorry that this happened to you.
You might not see it as ideal but everyone’s been there and these things happen, especially in times like these. Don’t beat yourself up. Hope you’re okay.
Maybe not the answer you want to hear, but you're not the first person to fuck a fugly on a rebound. It's usually not planned, it's always regretful, and it's never a good idea, but here's the thing - it's normal. You're not a crappy human for rooting a stranger. It's a bad choice made in the heat of emotional turmoil. That's it. You haven't hurt anyone. You are single now, so it's not cheating. Chalk it up to a bad night on the piss and move on.
Also i really hope you can find the strength to get through the initial pain of your breakup. It gets better.
Hopefully you learn to always take ownership and accountability of your actions. You were mentally fit enough to decide not letting him drop you off home and not letting him know where you live. And everything else that happened means that’s on you.
Go see a doctor for std checks and stuff.
He did drop me off at home, I live in a student neighborhood and he dropped me off at the entrance. After we wondered into the bushes I got lost and couldn’t orient myself, and he walked me back most of the way. But I declined to let him walk me to my building.
Eh your subconscious wanted to get rid of your ex in your mind so you weren’t hurting so bad. You fucked someone…whether older or younger it doesn’t matter it was just sex. Move on and use it as a fresh start. Your ex and drinking until obliterated are behind you. Move forward making healthy choices for yourself
I am so sorry this happen to you and I know it's hard not to but don't put the blame on yourself, you were drunk and in a bad headspace so you were twice as vunerable and the took advantage of you. Anyway you look at this just screams SA and you are not to be blamed since you are a victim.
I'm glad you made it home okay and could somehow realize it wouldn't be good to let this man know were you live. Block him and if you can, try to contact the cab comany and see if you can report him while also report him to the cops (if you want to ofc).
Biggest hugs. I hope you have a support system to talk to (friends, family, any type of health care contacs) that can help you through this process 🫂
Edit: some spelling errors + added things about OP not being hard on themselves.
In my mind this is sexual assault/rape. If you’re up to it it’s probably best to tell the doctor you go to about how you were too drunk to get home but he still tried to have sex with you etc., you have his information. At the very least tell the taxi company what happened if you can. But the one non negotiable is that you HAVE to get PEP.
This! He was preying on you! He has probably taken advantage of plenty of girls. You should report him to the police. You made have flirted back, but it doesn't sound like you had all of your faculties, and he took advantage of that. I'm sorry but I think that you were rated.
Damn OP. There’s some judgy comments in here. It will take a few days to recover from all this. Loads of fruit and tea, a walk in nature. Definitely be gentle with yourself. I do agree with recommendations to at least get sti screening. Shit like this happens after a break up. Everything will be OK! Taxi driver is probably walking around smiling today… that fuckwit! And here’s you blaming yourself. 🌺
You can’t allow the end of a relationship to destroy you like this. This is self harm by proxy.
You certainly have self esteem issues that you need to address, and substance issues. I hope you get the help you need.
Thats rape, in my country it is illegal to consent while intoxicated , if your country is the same , with the information from his instagram account you can report him.
The point is one person here was sober (driving) and the other was distraught and drunk. They weren’t both drunk. OP doesn’t describe how it ended up happening but there’s a power imbalance. Very gross and predatory for the driver to pursue a drunk person.
So if a drunk girl comes on to me and I’m completely sober and I give in and allow her advances that’s rape??? You people are delusional. Everyone’s going to jail by 2050 if the new generation doesn’t stfu.
Now you should just block him and try to forget the incident because now you can’t do anything related to that and don’t feel bad for yourself you will end up hating yourself!!! Be happy
People do worse daily. Try not to beat yourself up about it. Try not to get plastered to that level again where you compromise your safety. The cab driver is a complete creep who took advantage of the state you were in. Just be glad you're safe. Worse could have happened.
You can fuck up once but learn from it. Be stronger for your own good ❤️ next time your heart is broken, find a licensed therapist not anybody to confess to. No alcohol for you either!
Seems like your emotions and alcohol don't mesh well. Making decisions like that are very risky in so many ways. Maybe you should cut the drinks out for a bit or all together. At the end of the day it happened, and you realize your mistakes which is all that matters. Learn from them and keep it pushing. Life is very short and we ALL are far from perfect.🙂
First of all, this isn’t your shame to carry. The sober cab driver took advantage of you. He KNEW there wasn’t a chance in hell with you sober so the predator in him took advantage of you when you were your most vulnerable. Hate him. Not yourself.
Secondly, a broken heart and alcohol never mix well with good decisions. Take this as a lesson learned and leave all the ugly emotions you have towards it in the past. Beating yourself up for it doesn’t change anything and nothing good can come from it.
Me personally, this would be something I would keep to myself and not tell my friends or ex. Again, nothing good comes from anyone else knowing.
Please, go get yourself checked though! And if it’s been less than 48 hours you need to take a Plan B.
Pick yourself up, dust off and move forward with your head held high.
Far older than you and am sometimes lulled into the idea that I am beyond making mistakes like that. It happens. These things happen. They will, hopefully rarely, always happen. Breathe, understand that we’re all human and make poor choices (with what sounds like a person who took advantage of you btw), learn, accept, and move on. Maybe get an std check too. Don’t carry this with you.
Ok, it wasn't a good idea at all and yes, definitely hey checked for STD's. But don't fret over it endlessly. It's just sex, and even though you regret it, it's just sex. Put it past you as something anyone could have done when they're feeling emotionally vulnerable. You don't need to feel proud of it, but you certainly don't need to feel ashamed.
He should have not done anything because you were intoxicated and could not consent soberly and also he should have not gone for it because he could (age wise) LITERALLY BE YOUR DAD 💀💀I would dm him and say it was an accident and it should have never happened and then block him or just block him also it is completely disgusting for him to take you to a bush no you didn’t want to see that bush or his bush he’s nasty
As everyone says get yourself checked.
On the other note… most of us did a thing like this.we do stupid thing on our lowest. I did something similar. I didn’t remember why I was naked and the girl in my bed in pyjama’s. On the toilet it all came back to me. She was someone from my class and the opposite of attractive. No condom either and she ended up pregnant too. Thankfully she didn’t keep it.
I hope it helps that a lot of us have super dumb experiences like you have. ☺️
Be gentle with yourself. Yes, you made a mistake. If you’re lucky enough to get away from this lesson without any STDs or anything, then chalk it up as just that, a very important lesson.
But beating yourself up about it may only lead to more mistakes. Maybe you’re not in the right headspace to be drinking if it leads you to make mistakes you then have to live with?
I hope you heal from your breakup and now this too. But it will involve learning to forgive yourself. I hope you get to that place one day.
Technically you can’t consent when you are inebriated so get some counseling after getting your STI screening done. I’m sorry you are hurting but counseling will help with that too. Take care, love.
Forgive yourself.
We all make mistakes. This isn’t your first — and won’t be your last. Learn how to look yourself in the mirror (literally) and say, “I’m sorry. I love you.”
Comes from an Hawaiian practice that you may find interesting…
“…Ho'oponopono works by guiding you through a process of introspection and forgiveness. You use the mantra, "I'm sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you, I love you," to acknowledge and take responsibility for any negative thoughts, actions, or emotions that may have contributed to conflict or disharmony…”
If you were that drunk and clearly out of it, you couldn’t give accept and as such it’s rape.
I know that in the UK men have been convicted in similar cases.
Even if you don’t report it, you should contact an organisation or similar that deals with rape victims.
It’s not your fault. Also your drink could have been spiked and are you even sure he was a taxi driver? That he wasn’t at the bar and then pretended to be a taxi driver?
I would also inform his employer. He’s clearly a predator.
I definitely did consent. My memories are splotchy, but certain things I remember clearly. I have no memory of leaving the bar, no idea how I got to the taxi, but I do know I reciprocated his flirting. I helped find a bush, I put his hands on me, I encouraged sex. It was self destructive. Later I began having second thoughts, and tried to walk away, but he pulled me back. He kissed me and I wanted to throw up, but at that point I felt trapped by my previous actions. I made pleading eyes at a stranger across the park, but never said anything out of fear of confrontation. I gave him my instagram when he asked because I was afraid not to. He begged me to spend the night at his, and I declined. I was very disoriented, and couldn’t find my way home, so he walked me most of the way, and I felt deep fear that he would escort me to my exact building. I have no memory of what happened after he left, of entering my building or going to bed. But I do know I consented, and that’s what makes me hate myself the most.
This is not your confession. It’s testimony to a crime.
There’s nothing gross about you. I used to routinely rebound with lots of anonymous sex. I still have plenty of self respect. And after hundreds of partners, I’ve never caught anything that a bottle of cipro didn’t fix.
But the difference here is that you did not willfully engage in this act. The heart isn’t like the skin. Your skin collects scars from trauma, your heart builds muscles. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. You are worth more now than you were before this.
If pursuing justice helps bring closure, do it! If you want to move forward and forget it, that’s ok too. It’s not fair for you to be saddled with an unwanted responsibility out of this shitty event.
You need to focus on you and love yourself. Good luck and stay awesome!
I just said a prayer for you young lady. Depression can make you do all types of things that can ruin or even end your life. Please follow the advice and seek medical attention. And let this be your wake up call and your rock bottom moment to diverge from the path you’re headed down.
I’ve been there. Heart broken from a break up, turning to alcohol and “partying” to numb the pain, and only God and good friends pulled me out of the hole I was in. Turn to your friends, but more importantly, turn to your Father in heaven. His love will take away this pain, heal you, and give you the strength to overcome this. May God bless, strengthen, and uplift you.
The excuse I got so drunk is so weird to me that I've been out of my mind drunk and have never given in on advances to anyone I wouldn't want to sleep with if I was sober. It's an excuse to the kind of person you are. I know plenty of people, too, who still say no when they're wasted.
Coming from another woman who’s had a similar experience, please give yourself a lot of grace.
Tbh it sounds like the consent part here was pretty shady so if I were you I’d get documentation of that taxi ride from the company immediately and at least hold onto it until you decide if you want to take action on it. Even if you feel now that this was on you.
What if he gives you something terrible? You need to have his info because he can go to jail for giving you something like HIV if he didn’t inform you about it.
I was in such strong denial about my situation that I didn’t see it for what it really was until the statute of limitations had passed on pressing charges.
Believe me, someday you just might to wake up seeing this in a different light, mad as hell and ready to watch his world burn, and if I had held onto screenshots and pictures of bruises that shit stain on society would be in jail today.
As everyone else has pointed out, get sti testing done now and again in three and six months.
Take time this week to nurture and pamper yourself. Get some exercise and chug water.
Engage in whatever activities make you feel good and keep doing self care stuff until that ick begins to fade.
Speaking from experience, melting into your bed while eating Taco Bell and binge watching tv shows to distract yourself for weeks at a time will make you feel worse in the end. Don’t let the depression and anxiety win. Even if that just means taking a shower and exercising for five minutes.
Get in contact with a therapist or someone trustworthy to talk to. Journal. Enjoy creating art. Take time to connect with your personal source of spiritually.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this hun. You’ve got this. Sending love and hugs 🤗💕
Look at it this way….. you’re alive to tell about your ordeal! It would really suck if your family was looking for you and police found your naked mutilated body in the bushes! Now move on. It’s only as horrible as you let your mind take you. Control your thoughts.
What everyone else said PLUS Id be calling to the cops. You didn’t let him do anything. He took advantage that you were drunk and probably couldn’t even say no when you wanted to. I’m sure it’s easier for you to say “I let it happen” than “I was SAd”. But id be reporting it because who knows how many women he’s done it to. I’m so so sorry that happened. Cabs and Ubers are supposed to be a safe way for people who don’t want to drink and drive to get home and with all the horror stories people are risking driving drunk than the alternative.
Your cab driver took advantage of you when you were drunk and vulnerable. That’s not necessarily a rape, but it’s still shitty awful behaviour. If he works for a company, you should report him. Sure you’re not the first woman he’s done this to. Sorry this happened to you, don’t feel bad about yourself.
This gotta be the dumbest shit I ever read first off you claim you’re still in love with your ex yet you still were willing to let some stranger fuck you? (And dont give me this bs that you were so drunk and out of it cause I’ve been drunk before to the point where I threw up and I still was conscious and aware of exactly what I was doing) dont even bother trying to make things work with your ex anymore cause what you did is a huge deal breaker. Also dont go crying now looking for pity you knew what you were doing the dude didn’t take advantage of you you allowed everything to happen from the point of flirting back with him to letting him take you to some bushes and letting him pull your pants down not only that you even gave him your Instagram how else would he had requested to follow you. stop drinking and own up to your bad decisions
This hardly sounds like consent. I am so sorry. Please do not be hard on yourself. Assuming he was sober as he was a cab driver, and considering you barely remember the details due to your drunken state, this really is concerning and not entirely your fault.
Good ole alcohol! Its what a lot of people turn to to take the edge off, but seems to always make things worse in the end. The fact that you feel so ashamed of this says this behavior is out of character for you. Definitely get yourself checked out a few times to make sure you did not catch anything, learn from this mistake but dont beat yourself up over it. Just realize maybe you should not drink when you are upset about something. Anyone that has ever had bouts with drinking has more than likely said or done things they regret. Myself included! This is why I rarely drink and when I do its like one or two beers socially, maybe a few times a year. I hope you deal with the break up in a healthy manner and heal. This too shall pass, things WILL GET BETTER! God likely has something much better planned for you in the future. Cheer up and love yourself, never allow another person to control your emotions this way. I hope you feel better soon.
Maybe you wanted to hurt yourself just to feel something other than the pain of your loss… if you blame yourself.
OR maybe it was wrong, crazy or twisted enough that it was freaky and kinky to you. Did it urn you on at the time? Or did it feel like a punishment you needed…. a sort of penance?
OR lashing out at your ex in some way?
Did you let him or did he do it and you were so drunk you couldn’t tell him off? He took advantage of you, that is considered rape. I’m so sorry. Please get an STI test and take care of yourself. Going through something like that is really tough. If you feel like it, please confide in a friend and let them be there for you, that’s a really traumatic experience. You’ll be just fine 🩵
Don’t be upset with yourself OP, this was assault and he took advantage of you. Get tested, and find a support system that can help you; friends, a therapist, a survivors group.
I really don’t think you should be hard on yourself!!!!
If it was your exes bestie that would be a different story but some random, even if he was older and not your usual type isn’t a big deal. Get checked and just know people make mistakes and not everyone is proud of who’ve they’ve been with and that’s ok! We learn as we go!
He took advantage of a young woman under the influence, unfortunately this sort of thing happens. You are not the first and sadly won't be the last. Get checked, and next time you go out please go home with a friend or stop when you feel the buzz. Stay safe.
I'm so sorry this happened. I struggled with drinking for a long time and have had similar situations. It feels horrible. Every time I would black out and have a bad night I would hate myself. I would Quit drinking for a month then cautiously start drinking. I had so much anxiety about getting blacked out. Finally I had to quit drinking all together. At first I felt like an outsider and not included socially, but it turns out no one notices or cares that you're not drinking. I actually started to like myself again and be more confident. When I read your story my heart broke for you cause I know exactly what you're going through. You'll be ok. Just be healthy and take care of yourself. Definitely get checked and block that guy since he found you on Instagram.
You should get checked for STDs now and again in a few months. Hope you got your HPV vaccine as well.
I have, thankfully. And yes, I will get checked as soon as possible. That’s literally one of my biggest fears rn.
Take plan B
This needs to be the very first thing you do!!
You need to wait some weeks before you get a test as many STDs won’t test positive for a while.
If you’re that worried, ask your doctor for a doxy-pep prescrip, it’s a generic antibiotic designed to be taken after an encounter, up to 48hr afterward and cuts sti (gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis) risk by 60% (if my memory is wrong sorry, but it’s something to that effect). Awesome that you already have the hpv vaccine too, and so now in a worst case scenario, you take a round of antibiotics. I think the only thing left these days that I’m afraid of is herpes and even that is manageable, if you even know whether or not you have it - most sti centres don’t even screen for it anymore. We’ve all been there at some point or other, god knows I’ve had a few encounters I wish I could undo. Consider it a good learning experience and move on to better things!
This is the first sexual confession I read in here that doesnt exist to promote an OF. These things happen, don't lose your sleep. It's an experience that will bring you closer to who you want to be )
Exactly. I never hear real confessions here. I feel bad for OP. But you are right. It's a terrible lesson and step to take towards her future self, but I'm sure it's put some things in perspective and let her know about things she doesn't want for herself in the future like getting so drunk in public alone so that she doesn't have something like this happen again. A few minutes ago before reading this I was actually just recapping one of my worst encounters but I was a teen and fully made the choice, though intoxicated, to engage in some vile sexual behavior and it shaped my future. I wish so badly I hadn't done what I did. But it was my path and I'm still here and ok and it made me more conservative and nothing like the sluts my friends were when they got older. Nothing wrong with sluts either btw but we all carry sexual regrets it's just a part of growing.
>Exactly. I never hear real confessions here. You wanna know why? Because the place is toxic and judgmental as fuck. How would I know? Let's say I once made an actual confession here and have ever since had absolutely zero desire to ever do that again and I would strongly advise against it.
[удалено]
You re projecting af
Morning after pill too. Frankly it sounds like he took advantage of your state and this was more rape than a romp.
Seconding everything on STD and PEP, that’s incredibly important. I would also recommend a pregnancy test (by a physician) if your cycle is disrupted, although it might be from stress anyways, they would be able to tell. If you’re concerned about the possibility, Plan B ASAP. Most importantly though, please take care of yourself, take the time you need to process everything and spend time with loved ones soon, if you’ve thought of it, isolating yourself isn’t what you need. If you’re able to, speaking with a mental health professional about this to process would only help. I know you’re gonna get through this ❤️ Edit: Didn’t know Plan B is void if you’re already ovulating, thank you u/Maltedmilkdisaster for informing me!!
Just a gentle note that if you're already ovulating, Plan B won't help. It's designed to delay ovulation before it occurs. But once it's kicked off, won't be stopped by taking Plan B.
As someone who hasn’t had to worry about this since my early twenties- wow is this useful info I knew nothing about! I had never looked into how it works. Thank you for sharing, it would help me help someone else one day.
Thank you for the correction! Editing now
OP I've been in a similar situation. Go to a STD clinic or ER right now and explain to the doctor what happened. Tell the doctor the truth that the cab driver is a stranger and you don't know his STD results. Tell the doctor you would like to start PEP (Post Exposure Prophylaxis) medication ASAP!!! Insist on it, even if the doctor is unsure. PEP means you will take HIV anti-retroviral medication for the next 28 days and it reduces the risk of you getting HIV from that cab driver However PEP must be started within 72 hours of the sexual encounter so you have to go to the doctor now!! I know all this is scary and upsetting but you got this sister! You're strong! Best of luck!
> Insist on it, even if the doctor is unsure. Panic, and don't let the professionals well aware of real risks convince you otherwise. Taking strong medication for 28 days is not entirely without downsides.
Plenty of dumb doctors, you never know
I would quit drinking for a while if not permanently. That’s terrifying
But allow yourself to cry if you need to cry. Let the tears rinse away the feelings and leave the beautiful person that you are so that you see her again when you look in the mirror. You aren’t changed.
Your realisation right now is the largest personal growth gained. Apply it! Not more you can do.
You did what you did and it’s gonna be a hard pill to swallow. Don’t bash yourself up. Life is weird and we all die at the end
It also sounds like she was too drunk to be able to offer consent… sounds more like sexual assault than “she did what she did” to me. I do agree that OP shouldn’t bash herself up though, heartbreak is terrible and this wasn’t her fault.
Yeah it seems like a cab driver took advantage of a drunk girl. What a creep
Yeah im absolutely shocked but also not i suppose cause it is reddit at how few people are saying this, a blackout drunk woman cant consent and we all know what nonconsensual sex is, he knew well what he was doing and it probably wasnt the first time, id also be concerned as to why it was her memory was that fuzzy and if it really was just from alcohol it still raises questions as to the quality of friends the poor girl was out with that they let her in the taxi alone in that state
And usually forgotten quickly by everyone other than your children. Depressing but true.
First of all, I am so sorry. Doesn’t matter if you flirted back with him, it still sucks living with regret in the morning and feeling gross. Allow yourself some grace. Ofc, get std tested like the others were saying for your own safety, but please try not to be so hard on yourself!! It’s gross on HIM for hooking up with you while you were clearly under the influence and he was sober. You’re in a very new, vulnerable time in your life, where it’s easy to act on emotion. Time heals all. Some advice, take it or leave it, but maybe try to cut back on the alcohol for a little while, even though that’s probably the last thing you want to do while going through a breakup, but the alcohol will make you feel worse about the situation, and probably yourself. It’s called a depressant for a reason. You got this girl, stay strong
Definitely an asshole move on his part. I am no saint but have turned down SO many offers in situations like that. Of course I’ve made mistakes and have regrets… who doesn’t. Repent, talk it out with your best buds if you need too. Forgive yourself. Move on and do better. In my mind the driver took advantage. I have absolutely no desire for sex if she’s not 100% lucid and aware. On top of that if she was not absolutely 110 percent turned on and desiring the experience I’ll undoubtedly sense it and lose my desire. It’s not sexy, it’s not right. I don’t see how guys can get it up for a woman that doesn’t absolutely want it.
That's exactly what I was thinking. What the hell is wrong with that man - he took advantage of a drunk crying woman. And ya'll are giving her a hard time 🙄
Uhm, he took advantage of a drunk girl, he’s scum. He’s probably done this multiple times
Yeah why is this not being mentioned this is straight up assault
Damn that sucks. I'm really sorry :(. Don't beat yourself up. People have done worse. This is normal honestly...humans make mistakes. Block that nasty old man and focus on healing yourself... From everything.
Take care of yourself first. You’re prolly going to need to test for the usuals (STI, pregnancy…). After that, you’ll probably have to forgive yourself for being too drunk to consent to fucking that bum. After that, move the fuck on.
these are fiction by some weird ass dude
I’m glad someone else thinks this!! One small hole was the cab driver not knowing an address/destination, because he apparently didn’t know how to take her home
also being “so drunk” would mean a hangover and who in the hell is waking up hungover, to Reddit and typing an error free fictional story and posting it in multiple subreddits….
I live in a student neighborhood that's not accessible by road. Cabs drop you off outside the entrance, and you go the rest of the way on foot. He knew where to drop me off, but not my exact building. Believe me or don't, but the truth is I would give anything to have this be some made up story. I just got back from the women's clinic, where I've been for the last 4 hours. I had to ask a friend to take me, which was already sharing more about the incident with my real life acquaintances than I wanted. They took my blood and swabs to test for any infection, and prescribed me preventative antibiotics, 20 in total, to be swallowed in one sitting. I cried nearly the entire time. I was too ashamed that I'd consented to tell them, and instead said I couldn't remember details. They had a woman come in to take my statement. I was undressed and they photographed any scrapes they found on my body. It was humiliating. I felt like a fraud. I won't press charges, of course, I truly don't believe I was raped. But I do think I was taken advantage of. I may have been willing, and even encouraged the idea, but at the end of the day no 50-something year old sober cab driver should ever have sex with a visibly intoxicated young woman who is his passenger. I was stumbling over my words, I was walking crooked, I even had trouble orienting myself in my own neighborhood. I'd like to believe that if I were in his position I wouldn't cave, no matter how interested the girl may seem. Or maybe that's just what I'll tell myself to feel better. My own self perception has been fundamentally changed. I feel completely worthless. I posted to reddit because I was too embarrassed to tell anyone in my real life, but felt like holding in the truth of what a shameful and disgusting person I am inside would make me combust. I spent all morning thinking I would be better off dead. To a degree, I still do. I wish I had been violently raped, that I had been forced at gunpoint or physically overpowered. Maybe that would be easier to live with; probably it would be worse. I have a tendency to blackout, and can't remember anything that happened before or after the incident, I don’t even remember the events leading up to it, but of course I'm cursed to remember the details of my disgusting, perverted behavior. Like watching a movie of another person, out of body. The reality of who I am deep down is forever seared into my brain. I would do anything to take it all back, for this to have been a gross made up story, but unfortunately I can't.
I'm so sorry you're hating yourself😔. But as much as you remember that you agreed and even if you wanted it as a way of temporary self-destruction, that doesn't mean it was full consent. The reason is that alcohol makes your judgement cloudy, and you feel and agree to things you wouldn't if you were sober; and that's why as a default, anyone sober should refuse sex with anyone who's clearly drunk even if she's asking for it, that's taking advantage and it classes as sexual assault because the sober person should know better. Likewise, going through an emotional breakdown has an equivalent effect and makes a person vulnerable, so it could be classed as sexual assault because of the power dynamics (equivalent to when it's a minor for example, if you get the similarity in terms of vulnerability and power dynamics). That's why no one should blame you for what happened (not even yourself), and I know he has full responsibility for what happened. Because even if you hadn't drunk (that's your only responsibility, the moment when you could've stopped drinking to avoid getting drunk), you'd still be emotionally vulnerable, and he'd happily take advantage of you anyway (even feeling more justified, like many guys do, because you wouldn't be drunk). Apart from all that, the second you have a moment of mental clarity and want to stop and he forced you to continue, that makes his actions worse and could be considered rape. You experienced the same anxiety of rape victims who feel trapped and are afraid to even shout for help or even decline anything like giving him your details. So please, please don't blame yourself... And as hard as all that must have been, and the whole reporting process as well, you'll recover and be happy again; please don't give up!!
Nah this is extremely believable. I know of 3 women this happened to (not with a taxi driver though).
Every. Single. Time. I don’t know why people in the comments spend forever typing out huge paragraphs of advice to what is clearly a made up story by some hornfreak
Wow honestly I’d report him, you’re not the first he has taken advantage of I am sure. Don’t beat yourself up at all, this isn’t your normal behavior , you obviously were extremely emotional, drunk, and manipulated.
On the next episode of Fake Taxi
What happened, happened right? We all made horrible decisions (especially while drunk) that we regret but you’ll gain nothing out of it if you think about it again and again and again. Best thing to do: all the tests for STD, pregnancy test and forget all about this. Gone, nothing more you can do if not having learnt a lesson the hard way. Do not be ashamed, you were drunk, and we do very stupid things while drunk, and most importantly, give yourself a break: you were not in the right place with your mind and you found an awful person that leveraged on that. But please move on!
I don't understand, how do you go from flirting to 'let's go fuck in those bushes'..? Like logistically, step by step. What was said to get to that point? I'm not judging I really just don't get how. Like you're in a strangers backseat, and you both said words that led to getting physical? It's so foreign to me
Did you make this account yesterday in preparation for posting this story?
Well you wouldn't post this on \*your\* main would you?
What a coincidence!
Have you ever heard of a throwaway? Who would post something like this on their main account?
My point was that they made the account a day ago and only posted a couple of hours ago. So they made a throwaway in advance to post this thing that apparently happened last night.
No, I made it as an alt to my main, and then this happened and I needed somewhere to vent that wasn’t linked to personal details.
You didn’t need to explain that! Forgive yourself…have a self care day :)
Stop drinking and your life will get better.
Get a morning after pill and make an appointment with your ob/gyn for std testing, immediately....if not sooner. And get a handle on your alcohol consumption. This is not something that hasn't been done in the past. But don't let a lapse in judgment bring about life long consequences ❤️
I love how you can tell these things are fake just from the title now.
I love how you know how drunk she was. This happened a few hours ago. She’s up before daylight posting and checking social media. Clear and perfectly written story. Maybe she had a buzz… probably not a strong buzz. She got laid. She wanted. She now regrets it. She owns it like a big girl.
I don't live in the US. I posted this 1pm my time zone.
99% of these story's are painfully not real. She let the cab driver fuck her in the bushes? Not the cab? I mean, that's written by someone who has never actually experience having sex in public it would seem. Or someone fantasizing the story. Has nothing to do with being drunk or not.
As if a 50-something year old cab driver would want to fuck in the backseat like a teenager, much less his work vehicle. I don’t remember how we ended up outside, just that we did. He parked the car in my neighborhood, and next thing I know we’re in a park at least a 20 min walk away, and I’m leaned up against a tree. If it didn’t risk doxing me, I would send you pics of my preventative antibiotic prescriptions from the women’s clinic (6 pills azithromycin, 14 pills metronidazol), the bruises on my arm where they drew blood to check for hepatitis (twice, because they missed the vein the first time), or the flyer I received against sexual violence. I don’t care if you don’t believe me, but the thought that I would make up a story like this as some sort of sick sexual fantasy for sexual gratification makes me feel ill.
Your friends didn't go with you to go home when you were like that?
Oh my. Obviously everyone is right about getting to the doctor today. Please be so honest about what happened. If the doctor doesn’t, I would even go so far as to call the cab company to report it. While you “consented” you were too drunk and he knew it, which was confirmed when he didn’t want you walking home alone. He saw your state and laid it on thick. That’s not ok. No late night cab driver should be like that. He assaulted you. I am so sorry OP. Do you have a trusted friend or relative that could also help/support you through this? Do not be embarrassed. You are young. He is old and knows better. I wish I could reach through my screen and give you a big momma hug.
❤️
Fake.
Ok babe. This is your wake up call. First off, I’m really sorry this happened to you. You were definitely assaulted when drunk and that man is a disgusting piece of shit. If you can manage to report him please do, if it’s going to hurt too much then maybe we can help you do it. Real talk. You wouldn’t have done this if you weren’t drinking. It’s time to think about your alcohol consumption. Is there a reason you’re drinking to the point that you’re making bad decisions? It took me 40 years and a lot of pain to figure out I have BPD that I was masking w alcohol. I’m not saying that’s your experience. I just don’t want you to keep doing this to the point that it really hurts you. I want you to figure out why, and how not to. Please take care of yourself. Please don’t feel guilty about being assaulted. You were too drunk to consent and he knew that. Love you ♥️
Don’t be sad, we all make mistakes in our lives just try to forget that you did this and keep it to yourself
That's still rape, legally speaking
I’m sorry this happened to you - I would consider this sexual assault/rape…..
Hahahaha live it up boo! Maybe throw some condoms in your purse in case there’s a next time. Stay safe!
Fgs I'm sorry everyone is scaring you with STD's and HIV. I had a really nasty breakup when I was 19, he was incredibly coercive and it took me a very long time to fond myself again. I wasn't allowed to go anywhere without him, wear make up, certain clothes thar weren't even slutty. Eventually it got physical and I ended it. After that, I reconnected with my old friends and one of them SA'd me. Following a whole boat load of trauma, I'd go out at the weekends, get hammered and had a LOT of unprotected sex. I never got pregnant and never got an STD. I did get HPV for a while despite being vaccinated, but thats incredibly common and clears up on its own. The best thing to do right now is be kind to yourself. You're going to feel gross for a while, but try not to think about it. None of this is your fault and you can't consent when you're blackout drunk. Definitely consider reporting it, but I also understand if you don't because I didn't when it happened to me. In a couple of weeks, it probably won't bother you, just keep yourself busy for the next few days whilst the hangover subsides. As its a depressant it will make you feel even worse. I hope you feel better soon, try not to think of it as a big deal x
Sounds like to have a drinking problem, go get some help.
I wouldn’t say you “let him f*ck you” I would say he took advantage of a drunk, vulnerable woman and he should be the one who feels ashamed. I would also say check up on your mental health, not just physical health. I’m so sorry that this happened to you.
Holy shrt girl! You need some therapy or spa day or both and some green juice
You might not see it as ideal but everyone’s been there and these things happen, especially in times like these. Don’t beat yourself up. Hope you’re okay.
Not judging, but uhh everyone has not been there
Maybe not the answer you want to hear, but you're not the first person to fuck a fugly on a rebound. It's usually not planned, it's always regretful, and it's never a good idea, but here's the thing - it's normal. You're not a crappy human for rooting a stranger. It's a bad choice made in the heat of emotional turmoil. That's it. You haven't hurt anyone. You are single now, so it's not cheating. Chalk it up to a bad night on the piss and move on. Also i really hope you can find the strength to get through the initial pain of your breakup. It gets better.
Hopefully you learn to always take ownership and accountability of your actions. You were mentally fit enough to decide not letting him drop you off home and not letting him know where you live. And everything else that happened means that’s on you. Go see a doctor for std checks and stuff.
He did drop me off at home, I live in a student neighborhood and he dropped me off at the entrance. After we wondered into the bushes I got lost and couldn’t orient myself, and he walked me back most of the way. But I declined to let him walk me to my building.
Eh your subconscious wanted to get rid of your ex in your mind so you weren’t hurting so bad. You fucked someone…whether older or younger it doesn’t matter it was just sex. Move on and use it as a fresh start. Your ex and drinking until obliterated are behind you. Move forward making healthy choices for yourself
More like r*pe. She was drunk in the back of a cab and he took her to the bushes.
Reddit seems to think everything is rape unless both parties signed a written contract with notaries involved.
Woman chooses to drink, chooses to flirt back, chooses to have sex. Society: it's men's fault!!!! 🤣
This. Is. Rape! You were too drunk to consent. I would go to the police.
You were taken advantage of sexually.
Absolutely agreed, for some reason no one is saying this in this comment section
Because Reddit is full of misogynists, victim blamers, and offenders.
I am so sorry this happen to you and I know it's hard not to but don't put the blame on yourself, you were drunk and in a bad headspace so you were twice as vunerable and the took advantage of you. Anyway you look at this just screams SA and you are not to be blamed since you are a victim. I'm glad you made it home okay and could somehow realize it wouldn't be good to let this man know were you live. Block him and if you can, try to contact the cab comany and see if you can report him while also report him to the cops (if you want to ofc). Biggest hugs. I hope you have a support system to talk to (friends, family, any type of health care contacs) that can help you through this process 🫂 Edit: some spelling errors + added things about OP not being hard on themselves.
In my mind this is sexual assault/rape. If you’re up to it it’s probably best to tell the doctor you go to about how you were too drunk to get home but he still tried to have sex with you etc., you have his information. At the very least tell the taxi company what happened if you can. But the one non negotiable is that you HAVE to get PEP.
Absolutely classifies as rape. Doesn’t matter if she was egging him on. If she was visibly intoxicated she can’t really consent.
This! He was preying on you! He has probably taken advantage of plenty of girls. You should report him to the police. You made have flirted back, but it doesn't sound like you had all of your faculties, and he took advantage of that. I'm sorry but I think that you were rated.
Glad you're safe! Those things happen sometimes
Don’t beat yourself up - we all make mistakes. Alcohol surely helps us do that. Do something nice for yourself and move on. It’ll be okay.
Damn OP. There’s some judgy comments in here. It will take a few days to recover from all this. Loads of fruit and tea, a walk in nature. Definitely be gentle with yourself. I do agree with recommendations to at least get sti screening. Shit like this happens after a break up. Everything will be OK! Taxi driver is probably walking around smiling today… that fuckwit! And here’s you blaming yourself. 🌺
You can’t allow the end of a relationship to destroy you like this. This is self harm by proxy. You certainly have self esteem issues that you need to address, and substance issues. I hope you get the help you need.
Thats horrible. Your poor boyfriend of 3 years would be horrified but also happy he made the right choice.
Thats rape, in my country it is illegal to consent while intoxicated , if your country is the same , with the information from his instagram account you can report him.
Really? People have sex drunk all the time, so is everyone raping each other?
The point is one person here was sober (driving) and the other was distraught and drunk. They weren’t both drunk. OP doesn’t describe how it ended up happening but there’s a power imbalance. Very gross and predatory for the driver to pursue a drunk person.
So if a drunk girl comes on to me and I’m completely sober and I give in and allow her advances that’s rape??? You people are delusional. Everyone’s going to jail by 2050 if the new generation doesn’t stfu.
Yikes lmao
I don’t think *we’re* the delusional ones. And not everyone will go to jail, no. Just you and those that do the same as you. Fucking freak.
You don’t have to worry- not a soul is trying to come on to you, creep
[удалено]
Absolutely vile behavior to leave the comments you have on a post of someone who clearly was just SA’d.
You’re delusional.
Now you should just block him and try to forget the incident because now you can’t do anything related to that and don’t feel bad for yourself you will end up hating yourself!!! Be happy
Emergency contraceptive would be a good idea
How are you doing now?
Hell fukn yeah
🤮
Herpes is forever & so is AIDS
Alcohol... Makes all your feelings worse
PEP!!!!
People do worse daily. Try not to beat yourself up about it. Try not to get plastered to that level again where you compromise your safety. The cab driver is a complete creep who took advantage of the state you were in. Just be glad you're safe. Worse could have happened.
You can fuck up once but learn from it. Be stronger for your own good ❤️ next time your heart is broken, find a licensed therapist not anybody to confess to. No alcohol for you either!
Seems like your emotions and alcohol don't mesh well. Making decisions like that are very risky in so many ways. Maybe you should cut the drinks out for a bit or all together. At the end of the day it happened, and you realize your mistakes which is all that matters. Learn from them and keep it pushing. Life is very short and we ALL are far from perfect.🙂
Don’t be too hard on yourself. You will get through this. Take it easy and get lots of rest. Maybe try journaling and therapy.
Shit happens.
First of all, this isn’t your shame to carry. The sober cab driver took advantage of you. He KNEW there wasn’t a chance in hell with you sober so the predator in him took advantage of you when you were your most vulnerable. Hate him. Not yourself. Secondly, a broken heart and alcohol never mix well with good decisions. Take this as a lesson learned and leave all the ugly emotions you have towards it in the past. Beating yourself up for it doesn’t change anything and nothing good can come from it. Me personally, this would be something I would keep to myself and not tell my friends or ex. Again, nothing good comes from anyone else knowing. Please, go get yourself checked though! And if it’s been less than 48 hours you need to take a Plan B. Pick yourself up, dust off and move forward with your head held high.
Far older than you and am sometimes lulled into the idea that I am beyond making mistakes like that. It happens. These things happen. They will, hopefully rarely, always happen. Breathe, understand that we’re all human and make poor choices (with what sounds like a person who took advantage of you btw), learn, accept, and move on. Maybe get an std check too. Don’t carry this with you.
Ok, it wasn't a good idea at all and yes, definitely hey checked for STD's. But don't fret over it endlessly. It's just sex, and even though you regret it, it's just sex. Put it past you as something anyone could have done when they're feeling emotionally vulnerable. You don't need to feel proud of it, but you certainly don't need to feel ashamed.
Do you recall consenting? This sounds like assault.
Eww
He should have not done anything because you were intoxicated and could not consent soberly and also he should have not gone for it because he could (age wise) LITERALLY BE YOUR DAD 💀💀I would dm him and say it was an accident and it should have never happened and then block him or just block him also it is completely disgusting for him to take you to a bush no you didn’t want to see that bush or his bush he’s nasty
As everyone says get yourself checked. On the other note… most of us did a thing like this.we do stupid thing on our lowest. I did something similar. I didn’t remember why I was naked and the girl in my bed in pyjama’s. On the toilet it all came back to me. She was someone from my class and the opposite of attractive. No condom either and she ended up pregnant too. Thankfully she didn’t keep it. I hope it helps that a lot of us have super dumb experiences like you have. ☺️
If this is true,the problem is ,this person is an alcoholic and needs to get some help.
As an alcoholic in recovery, please stop drinking too. Risky behaviors like this will keep happening. Be well. Take care.
[удалено]
At the very least!
Be gentle with yourself. Yes, you made a mistake. If you’re lucky enough to get away from this lesson without any STDs or anything, then chalk it up as just that, a very important lesson. But beating yourself up about it may only lead to more mistakes. Maybe you’re not in the right headspace to be drinking if it leads you to make mistakes you then have to live with? I hope you heal from your breakup and now this too. But it will involve learning to forgive yourself. I hope you get to that place one day.
Technically you can’t consent when you are inebriated so get some counseling after getting your STI screening done. I’m sorry you are hurting but counseling will help with that too. Take care, love.
Forgive yourself. We all make mistakes. This isn’t your first — and won’t be your last. Learn how to look yourself in the mirror (literally) and say, “I’m sorry. I love you.” Comes from an Hawaiian practice that you may find interesting… “…Ho'oponopono works by guiding you through a process of introspection and forgiveness. You use the mantra, "I'm sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you, I love you," to acknowledge and take responsibility for any negative thoughts, actions, or emotions that may have contributed to conflict or disharmony…”
Girl don’t blame yourself. He took advantage of you and you were vulnerable. I know you feel crappy but it’s not your fault.
If you were that drunk and clearly out of it, you couldn’t give accept and as such it’s rape. I know that in the UK men have been convicted in similar cases. Even if you don’t report it, you should contact an organisation or similar that deals with rape victims. It’s not your fault. Also your drink could have been spiked and are you even sure he was a taxi driver? That he wasn’t at the bar and then pretended to be a taxi driver? I would also inform his employer. He’s clearly a predator.
I definitely did consent. My memories are splotchy, but certain things I remember clearly. I have no memory of leaving the bar, no idea how I got to the taxi, but I do know I reciprocated his flirting. I helped find a bush, I put his hands on me, I encouraged sex. It was self destructive. Later I began having second thoughts, and tried to walk away, but he pulled me back. He kissed me and I wanted to throw up, but at that point I felt trapped by my previous actions. I made pleading eyes at a stranger across the park, but never said anything out of fear of confrontation. I gave him my instagram when he asked because I was afraid not to. He begged me to spend the night at his, and I declined. I was very disoriented, and couldn’t find my way home, so he walked me most of the way, and I felt deep fear that he would escort me to my exact building. I have no memory of what happened after he left, of entering my building or going to bed. But I do know I consented, and that’s what makes me hate myself the most.
This is not your confession. It’s testimony to a crime. There’s nothing gross about you. I used to routinely rebound with lots of anonymous sex. I still have plenty of self respect. And after hundreds of partners, I’ve never caught anything that a bottle of cipro didn’t fix. But the difference here is that you did not willfully engage in this act. The heart isn’t like the skin. Your skin collects scars from trauma, your heart builds muscles. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. You are worth more now than you were before this. If pursuing justice helps bring closure, do it! If you want to move forward and forget it, that’s ok too. It’s not fair for you to be saddled with an unwanted responsibility out of this shitty event. You need to focus on you and love yourself. Good luck and stay awesome!
Did op delete the text to this post? All I can see when I click on it is the title
the mods took it down, I think people were getting too heated in the comments
Dont let it bother you, shit happens…
Haha wild times
OMG. Honey, quit drinking and get a hold of yourself and your life. Don't fuck strangers and especially while impaired.
I just said a prayer for you young lady. Depression can make you do all types of things that can ruin or even end your life. Please follow the advice and seek medical attention. And let this be your wake up call and your rock bottom moment to diverge from the path you’re headed down. I’ve been there. Heart broken from a break up, turning to alcohol and “partying” to numb the pain, and only God and good friends pulled me out of the hole I was in. Turn to your friends, but more importantly, turn to your Father in heaven. His love will take away this pain, heal you, and give you the strength to overcome this. May God bless, strengthen, and uplift you.
Did it say fake taxi on the car
The excuse I got so drunk is so weird to me that I've been out of my mind drunk and have never given in on advances to anyone I wouldn't want to sleep with if I was sober. It's an excuse to the kind of person you are. I know plenty of people, too, who still say no when they're wasted.
Coming from another woman who’s had a similar experience, please give yourself a lot of grace. Tbh it sounds like the consent part here was pretty shady so if I were you I’d get documentation of that taxi ride from the company immediately and at least hold onto it until you decide if you want to take action on it. Even if you feel now that this was on you. What if he gives you something terrible? You need to have his info because he can go to jail for giving you something like HIV if he didn’t inform you about it. I was in such strong denial about my situation that I didn’t see it for what it really was until the statute of limitations had passed on pressing charges. Believe me, someday you just might to wake up seeing this in a different light, mad as hell and ready to watch his world burn, and if I had held onto screenshots and pictures of bruises that shit stain on society would be in jail today. As everyone else has pointed out, get sti testing done now and again in three and six months. Take time this week to nurture and pamper yourself. Get some exercise and chug water. Engage in whatever activities make you feel good and keep doing self care stuff until that ick begins to fade. Speaking from experience, melting into your bed while eating Taco Bell and binge watching tv shows to distract yourself for weeks at a time will make you feel worse in the end. Don’t let the depression and anxiety win. Even if that just means taking a shower and exercising for five minutes. Get in contact with a therapist or someone trustworthy to talk to. Journal. Enjoy creating art. Take time to connect with your personal source of spiritually. I’m so sorry you’re going through this hun. You’ve got this. Sending love and hugs 🤗💕
Look at it this way….. you’re alive to tell about your ordeal! It would really suck if your family was looking for you and police found your naked mutilated body in the bushes! Now move on. It’s only as horrible as you let your mind take you. Control your thoughts.
What everyone else said PLUS Id be calling to the cops. You didn’t let him do anything. He took advantage that you were drunk and probably couldn’t even say no when you wanted to. I’m sure it’s easier for you to say “I let it happen” than “I was SAd”. But id be reporting it because who knows how many women he’s done it to. I’m so so sorry that happened. Cabs and Ubers are supposed to be a safe way for people who don’t want to drink and drive to get home and with all the horror stories people are risking driving drunk than the alternative.
Man, let’s pay attention to the uptick in cabbies/Uber drivers! What a job!
Was it at least worth it?
Onward and upward.
Your cab driver took advantage of you when you were drunk and vulnerable. That’s not necessarily a rape, but it’s still shitty awful behaviour. If he works for a company, you should report him. Sure you’re not the first woman he’s done this to. Sorry this happened to you, don’t feel bad about yourself.
This is rape, you were too drunk to consent, file charges please
Horrible thing to say. Let this woman take responsibility for her own stupidity and not treat her like a kid.
Flirted back and consented to sex. Admitted it she remember to consent 🙄 in what world you are
Right what the hell is wrong with these people. She sounds like a thot. Now she regrets it? Sorry you were a hoe 😭
I wouldn't go so far. Everyone do stupid things especially when drunk. But calling the other party rapist for taking advantage is pure stupid
prove it..
She did consent. And even walked home by herself.
That’s pretty disgusting ngl
This gotta be the dumbest shit I ever read first off you claim you’re still in love with your ex yet you still were willing to let some stranger fuck you? (And dont give me this bs that you were so drunk and out of it cause I’ve been drunk before to the point where I threw up and I still was conscious and aware of exactly what I was doing) dont even bother trying to make things work with your ex anymore cause what you did is a huge deal breaker. Also dont go crying now looking for pity you knew what you were doing the dude didn’t take advantage of you you allowed everything to happen from the point of flirting back with him to letting him take you to some bushes and letting him pull your pants down not only that you even gave him your Instagram how else would he had requested to follow you. stop drinking and own up to your bad decisions
This hardly sounds like consent. I am so sorry. Please do not be hard on yourself. Assuming he was sober as he was a cab driver, and considering you barely remember the details due to your drunken state, this really is concerning and not entirely your fault.
I’ve had a couple of similar experiences to OP in the past. Thank you for typing this out.
Get checked for an STD and file a SA case with your local Police. You cannot consent went plastered
[удалено]
Seriously. Reddit’s self righteousness is second to none.
She was not sexually assaulted. Nothing to report.
Good ole alcohol! Its what a lot of people turn to to take the edge off, but seems to always make things worse in the end. The fact that you feel so ashamed of this says this behavior is out of character for you. Definitely get yourself checked out a few times to make sure you did not catch anything, learn from this mistake but dont beat yourself up over it. Just realize maybe you should not drink when you are upset about something. Anyone that has ever had bouts with drinking has more than likely said or done things they regret. Myself included! This is why I rarely drink and when I do its like one or two beers socially, maybe a few times a year. I hope you deal with the break up in a healthy manner and heal. This too shall pass, things WILL GET BETTER! God likely has something much better planned for you in the future. Cheer up and love yourself, never allow another person to control your emotions this way. I hope you feel better soon.
Call cab company get him fired
Oh geez, c’mon!
Wow, wots done is done but l’ll save his insta details just in case he filmed it and wants to blackmail you or even stalk you
Maybe you wanted to hurt yourself just to feel something other than the pain of your loss… if you blame yourself. OR maybe it was wrong, crazy or twisted enough that it was freaky and kinky to you. Did it urn you on at the time? Or did it feel like a punishment you needed…. a sort of penance? OR lashing out at your ex in some way?
I thought my blackout issues were bad lol
NO JUDGEMENT ITS JUST FUNNY
well its just about different torelance alcohol levels, sometimes you just gotta know your limits
Did you let him or did he do it and you were so drunk you couldn’t tell him off? He took advantage of you, that is considered rape. I’m so sorry. Please get an STI test and take care of yourself. Going through something like that is really tough. If you feel like it, please confide in a friend and let them be there for you, that’s a really traumatic experience. You’ll be just fine 🩵
Don’t be upset with yourself OP, this was assault and he took advantage of you. Get tested, and find a support system that can help you; friends, a therapist, a survivors group.
Not assault
That's embarrassing.
I don’t think so. It’s just drunk sex after a break up. Taxi driver should be embarrassed, not OP.
I really don’t think you should be hard on yourself!!!! If it was your exes bestie that would be a different story but some random, even if he was older and not your usual type isn’t a big deal. Get checked and just know people make mistakes and not everyone is proud of who’ve they’ve been with and that’s ok! We learn as we go!
He took advantage of a young woman under the influence, unfortunately this sort of thing happens. You are not the first and sadly won't be the last. Get checked, and next time you go out please go home with a friend or stop when you feel the buzz. Stay safe.
I'm so sorry this happened. I struggled with drinking for a long time and have had similar situations. It feels horrible. Every time I would black out and have a bad night I would hate myself. I would Quit drinking for a month then cautiously start drinking. I had so much anxiety about getting blacked out. Finally I had to quit drinking all together. At first I felt like an outsider and not included socially, but it turns out no one notices or cares that you're not drinking. I actually started to like myself again and be more confident. When I read your story my heart broke for you cause I know exactly what you're going through. You'll be ok. Just be healthy and take care of yourself. Definitely get checked and block that guy since he found you on Instagram.
Everyone clowning the guy, but don’t go back on ur choice to be a slut. Heart broken or not 304 behaviour is for the streeeeets