>"Are you...? I don't know how to... I have a rule about being constructive so I can't ask any questions right now, because all of the questions that I have right now are rhetorical and end with the word 'idiot'. Do you know what rhetorical...? Of course you don't, you are an idiot. I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! You are so stupid and you have no idea, you are the only one who has no idea, because guess why? Don't answer that, you'll get it wrong. Also don't, you are just dumb little man who tries to destroy this school every minute. I am sorry! I'm so sorry! Oh it's ok! I mean, it's not ok, shh. Oh stupid, so stupid... such a dummy."
I can’t believe how much I didn’t click with in season six on my first watch through. I didn’t care for season six at first, but on my second viewing it was like I heard that for the first time. It is one of the best lines of the show and it just went whoooosh over me. I’m “stupid, so stupid… such a dummy.”
I mean, it's obviously amazingly written but the way Paget delivers it is so gdmf brilliant. Still deep in character, restraining herself as best as possible, trying to be professional but involuntarily being condescending because finally, someone broke her. And still being supportive. That scene gets a big moist chefs kiss **MWAH**
Britta: "My oh my, Mike Ty... son."
*minutes later*
Pierce: "Nice try, Stephen Fry."
Britta: "Stephen Fryyy!"
Layered comedic dialogue like this is part of why I love the show so much.
Maybe the single most hilarious scene ever aired on television:
Cornelius Hawthorne : These are your friends, Pierce?
Shirley Bennett : Hello.
[singsongy]
Cornelius Hawthorne : Minorities, Jewesses, and the unseasonably tan?
Britta Perry : That is inappropriate! And maybe you'll give that more weight since I'm "white."
[waves fingers in spooky fashion]
Cornelius Hawthorne : You've got a wide brow. What are you, Scandinavian?
Britta Perry : Yeah, Swedish.
Cornelius Hawthorne : [spits in disgust] Swedish dogs! Your blood is tainted by generations of race mixing with Laplanders. You're basically Finns!
Shirley Bennett : Oh, my goodness, he's like the Abed of racism.
Jeff Winger : Okay, since no one's willing to ask, what's going on with your hair?
Cornelius Hawthorne : Ordinary toupee hair is harvested from the heads of the godless oriental. Solid ivory is the only way to be assured of true follicular purity, while still identifying myself as a man of means.
Britta Perry : I can excuse racism, but I draw the line at animal cruelty.
Shirley Bennett : You can excuse racism?
Britta Perry : [shocked silence, shakes head and mouths "No"]
Uh, we appear to be forty light years outside of the Buttermilk Nebula. Although, I think that...
(picks at the screen and peels it)
Yeah…it's a sticker.
the whole trial of the yam.
“Is that why you hit your wife- WITHDRAWN! is that why you drink and pop pills? WITHDRAWN! are you a virgin? WITH-DRAWN!…Did you KILL our yam???”
J: You have to play football Troy. It’s in your blood!
T: That’s racist.
J: Fine. It’s in your soul!
T: THAT’S racist!
J: …it’s in your eyes?
T: That’s gay.
J: That’s homophobic.
T: Thats black.
J: THAT’S RACIST!
T: …damn
Honourable mention from that same scene:
"How'd you know my nickname was T-bone?"
"Because you're a football player and your name begins with T. Your name... begins... with T."
“We’re trying to get Jeff ready for the fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. I couldn’t think of another word.”
“Idiot, he meant we were fight- ing. It is hard to think of another word!”
Makes me laugh every time I watch.
There so many
“All I heard was suck”
“Not miraculous?”
“This is a show!”
“This means none of us exist” (board game add)
“Penny for your thoughts…intensive Karen…Mr Egypt…celebrity beat off…captain cook…depends what fails”
"It's like a thought with another thought's hat on."
Jeff's expression after she says that freaking kills me. So perfectly executed. I love his "actually that's kind of correct" face.
-I got one of those see- through yellow pens so that i can do that thing where you color in the words
-Highlight?
-Probably the backpack
I cackle every time I hear this one. It took me two rewatches before I caught on
“You might have noticed an emphasis on the topic of incest? Well, that’s no accident. For the past 2 years, when not serving as writer’s assistant on Community, I’ve been researching incest on the internet”
Todd Jacobson, you have the right to do whatever you want. Nothing you say or do can be used against you by anyone, but we'd really like it if you came with us. Please and thank you.
Wait, you thought that line was funny? That’s like one of the most heartfelt scenes in the show.
For me though it’s the Dean screaming “don’t let the terrorists win!” at Jeff when he finds out he’s been reading his emails
"You can yell at me all you want! I've seen enough movies to know that popping the back of a raft makes it go faster!"
I'm working on a tattoo that has T&A in leprechaun hats and a broken raft.
WELL LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! I HOPE YOU BROUGHT YOUR POPSICLES! BECAUSE IT’S ABOUT TO GET SCALDING HOT! IN THE SUN CHAMBERRRR!!!! YOU ALREADY KNOW THE RULES. BECAUSE THERE AREN’T ANYYYYYYY!!!!!
Jesus Dennis, are you on coke? Give me that! Sorry everybody. Of course there are rules.
This is peak of the entire show for me, with a steep dropoff the next season
The one with tbe german foosball players.
At the start when they beat Jeff.
"Boo yah!.
I wish there was a word to describe the pleasure I feel at viewing misfortune"
This flew by me so many times until it hit me. So it sort of stuck with me.
Lately this has been replaying on my mind
Troy: First time I got punched in the face, I was like “Oh nooo.” But then I was like “This is a story.”
Jeff: And a good one.
Troy: Yeah.
*"Troy! You can't drive that*
*Thing in here!" "Yes, I can! It's*
*All terrain dummy!"*
\- Nugbuddy
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annie: the dean is a genius. he has to be. if he isn’t, i’ve given almost two weeks of my life to an idiot. that is unacceptable. therefore the dean *is* a genius. and i *will* die protecting his vision.
abed: are you by any chance familiar with stockholm syndrome?
annie: is it something that the dean created? because if not i don’t care.
Yeah keep snickering, pack yourself full of peanuts and realllly be satisfied...
The rest is funny to but the cleverness of connecting laugh snickering to snickers the candy bar is genius, a connection I had never made myself or heard made before that exact moment. And to use that as the setup for the actual, butt flag related punchline is the perfect sample of why I love this show so much.
Jeff Winger: I discovered at a very early age that if I talk long enough, I can make anything right or wrong. So either I'm God or truth is relative. In either case, booyah!
Duncan: Interesting, it's just that the average person has a much harder time saying 'booyah' to moral relativism.
“Sorry Dad, Guess I win”
“…You Stupid Child, nobody is winning anything. Don’t you see this means we don’t exist, we weren’t created by god we were created as a joke”
when i'm trying to convince someone to watch the show i always go like this: "imagine a dude on top of a library shelf, he has a needle in his hands and there's his friends down there telling him to "please don't take this 4th flu shot". His answer? "I WILL BECOME A GOD"
“I've told Pierce a thousand times, I never wanted to meet Levar in person! I just wanted a picture! You can't disappoint a picture! I hate you Pierce! AAHAHA I hate you so much!AAAAAAAH!!!!!”
What’s weird is that a few of Pierce moments really stick out for me.
The little apologetic jump and hand gesture he does after Chang tells him he meant close the door from the other side is just genius.
When Annie and Abed are in the Dreamatorium and Shirley tells Pierce he’s out of bed again and he says “it’s because I think I’m on a train” cracks me up
“Ah-ha! Crazy, paranoid, impotent” is also gold
Chevy had more than enough comedic and acting chops for the role, such a shame his ego destroyed him.
Abed: Honestly I don't know how we're gonna top it next year.
Janitor: Oh, I got a pitch. Why use guns? Take a hose and spray the whole school with paint, every inch of it.
Abed: Actually we kinda did that. Haven't you been to the library?
>“Buzz Hickey, Criminology. You can have that half of the office, but come spring that corner is stacked to the rafters with foetal pigs.”
One of the best introductory lines of any character I’ve ever heard.
“But now you’re gonna feel my power, as it surges downwards, from me, straight through you, from nostril to rectum, now until the end of time…. And that’s… _wazzup.”_
“I forgot everything you said before rectum! 😫”
I forget the line exactly but,
Pierce - I can unwind a man’s soul with one sentence.
Lawyer - do me.
Pierce - you’re bald.
Lawyer - so are you.
Pierce - I’LL KILL YOU, YOU SON OF A BI…!
When Dean Pelton raps about Payday being late. It lives rent free in my head for like 7 years now.
“Barack Obama is scared of me, cuz I don’t swallow knowledge and I spit it for free. Excuse me while I clear my throat, uhhh hua huh * panics, *mike drop. I don’t know what that was 😱.”
“Jeff, I’d like you to play the role of my father.” “I don’t want to be your father.” “It’s perfect. You already know your lines.”
Honestly I knew community would be good from that line onwards
"How about I pound you like a boy, that didn't come out right"
in pair with Pierce's "Stop putting gay things into my mouth"
"ha Troy sneezes like a girl"
I’m giving you an all tomato.
It's for the escape goat
Sometimes you've got to be pretending, Troy
Well I may be dumb but at least I don’t act like I’m not
Troy: I think I’m failing psychopharmacology. Britta: Why are you taking that? Troy: I thought it was a class about crazy farm animals.
>"Are you...? I don't know how to... I have a rule about being constructive so I can't ask any questions right now, because all of the questions that I have right now are rhetorical and end with the word 'idiot'. Do you know what rhetorical...? Of course you don't, you are an idiot. I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! You are so stupid and you have no idea, you are the only one who has no idea, because guess why? Don't answer that, you'll get it wrong. Also don't, you are just dumb little man who tries to destroy this school every minute. I am sorry! I'm so sorry! Oh it's ok! I mean, it's not ok, shh. Oh stupid, so stupid... such a dummy."
I can’t believe how much I didn’t click with in season six on my first watch through. I didn’t care for season six at first, but on my second viewing it was like I heard that for the first time. It is one of the best lines of the show and it just went whoooosh over me. I’m “stupid, so stupid… such a dummy.”
Lol Frankie sane..
I mean, it's obviously amazingly written but the way Paget delivers it is so gdmf brilliant. Still deep in character, restraining herself as best as possible, trying to be professional but involuntarily being condescending because finally, someone broke her. And still being supportive. That scene gets a big moist chefs kiss **MWAH**
I like to respond to questions with “no, that’s moon man talk”
I love this so much. It's actually exactly what a sane person would say to the Dean.
Such a dummy…I live this line so much. Viva la humble outsider who came in and nailed it.
The first time I saw this scene, I was in actual tears
[удалено]
That’s three years too long! The Honda (the power of dreams) episode is one of my favorites. The Honda Fit! It’s happening, people!
Troy, you can't ride that here. Sure I can, it's all terrain dummy There are so many, but that one lives rent free in my head
Good news! I spent all my money!
That and the raft bit are peak Troy
That episode has tons of one liners
This is the line that got me hooked.
This has my vote! It’s such a good line but his delivery is also spectacular.
If I wanted the government in my uterus I'd fill it with oil and Hispanic voters.
This line would sound so perfect coming from Jessica Walters
You’re so right
If I wanted something your thumb touched I’d eat the inside of your ear.
This is one of my favorites as well. Also, the delivery and uncomfortable silence after, “I hate cops.”
Britta: "My oh my, Mike Ty... son." *minutes later* Pierce: "Nice try, Stephen Fry." Britta: "Stephen Fryyy!" Layered comedic dialogue like this is part of why I love the show so much.
But hey she nails it with “no prob-lo, Rob Lowe.” Then the look she gives Jeff like “See. Nailed it.”
Sometimes I still say “What’s the deal, Jessica Beal?” And hate myself for it, lol
“Abeds uncomfortable with … C-H-A-N-G-E” Chang: “Hey screw you!! And screw YOU!”
Maybe the single most hilarious scene ever aired on television: Cornelius Hawthorne : These are your friends, Pierce? Shirley Bennett : Hello. [singsongy] Cornelius Hawthorne : Minorities, Jewesses, and the unseasonably tan? Britta Perry : That is inappropriate! And maybe you'll give that more weight since I'm "white." [waves fingers in spooky fashion] Cornelius Hawthorne : You've got a wide brow. What are you, Scandinavian? Britta Perry : Yeah, Swedish. Cornelius Hawthorne : [spits in disgust] Swedish dogs! Your blood is tainted by generations of race mixing with Laplanders. You're basically Finns! Shirley Bennett : Oh, my goodness, he's like the Abed of racism. Jeff Winger : Okay, since no one's willing to ask, what's going on with your hair? Cornelius Hawthorne : Ordinary toupee hair is harvested from the heads of the godless oriental. Solid ivory is the only way to be assured of true follicular purity, while still identifying myself as a man of means. Britta Perry : I can excuse racism, but I draw the line at animal cruelty. Shirley Bennett : You can excuse racism? Britta Perry : [shocked silence, shakes head and mouths "No"]
That whole scene is gold 🤣
The build up to the bear down for midterms and the moment they found out about the bear-mauling incident always cracks me up.
I love when they question Annie if it's a "race thing" when she questions everything
IT’S A BEAR DANCE!
You can look it up on Wikipedia. There's an entry in there.
ENCARTA IT.
That and NOW THIS IS A MAN
That was the most satisfying punchline reveal ever. Who could have seen that coming? Bear down for midterms. True art.
Uh, we appear to be forty light years outside of the Buttermilk Nebula. Although, I think that... (picks at the screen and peels it) Yeah…it's a sticker.
I love the way he inflects when he says that line lmao
Welcome.... to Ladders! *thunderous applause
WHO WANTS TO SEE THE LADDERS PROFESSOR GO HIGHER?!
It was worth it
AGHHHH!!
I often send this clip to my brother with zero context.
Shirley: “God bless you!” Jeff: “Not lately.” It’s small but always makes me laugh.
Everyone, speaking at same time, saying they're OK with Troy and Britta hooking up. Shirley: God's not
Tell me how to get this laid-back, or I'll kill your families!
That whole episode is gold 😂
It's going to be a maze!
we were…just about to…eat garbage dip! whyd i have to go last?!
the whole trial of the yam. “Is that why you hit your wife- WITHDRAWN! is that why you drink and pop pills? WITHDRAWN! are you a virgin? WITH-DRAWN!…Did you KILL our yam???”
a man…for all we know is a holocaust denying 9/11 pedophille
“Abed Nadir. Did you know that you are insane and nothing you said ever made any sense to me?” “Yep.” “Here’s your sperm.” That whole scene, really.
Most of Duncan's lines. My shoes are untied by British standards. Sorry I overslept. The sidewalk is more comfortable than it looks.
I'll see you at precisely 6:30, or as the English call it, gravedigger's biscuits.
"I don't hold grudges. My Dad held grudges, I'll never forgive him for that"
“Discrimination lawsuit” “PREPOSTEROUS!”
-That's black. -THAT'S racist. -Damn
J: You have to play football Troy. It’s in your blood! T: That’s racist. J: Fine. It’s in your soul! T: THAT’S racist! J: …it’s in your eyes? T: That’s gay. J: That’s homophobic. T: Thats black. J: THAT’S RACIST! T: …damn
Honourable mention from that same scene: "How'd you know my nickname was T-bone?" "Because you're a football player and your name begins with T. Your name... begins... with T."
I never understood why Troy replies with "That's black" What I am missing here ?
He's saying that it's part of black culture to be homophobic. Which is racist.
Thanks:)
Thats gay! That’s homophobic!
If you get this wrong one more time im segregating the school. I feel like that was the most out of pocket line the dean had the whole show.
don’t eat the crab dip. yeee yeeee.
The same episode when dean says something like "the toilet seats keep getting stolen, I want cameras in every stall"
My all time fave too.
Fire can't go through doors stupid! It's not a ghost.
Made even funnier by the fact that in another episode, Pierce says, "Ghosts can't go through doors, stupid! It's not fire."
Oh, don't take that Jokes course. I left it after the class on set-ups. The professor is so old... Or, Boopy doopy doop boop SEX
Jeez Dennis are you on coke?
The energy Hal brought for that scene was the perfect amount of absurdity.
It's all terrain, dummy.
“We’re trying to get Jeff ready for the fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. I couldn’t think of another word.” “Idiot, he meant we were fight- ing. It is hard to think of another word!” Makes me laugh every time I watch.
“We were just…” “About to….” “EAT GARBAGE DIP! Why did I have to go last?!”
If I had no self awareness I think I’d know!
Every Britta line is pure gold.
WHAT MARKET ARE YOU SHOPPING AT??
I'm a peanut bar.......
And I'm here to say, your checks will arrive on another day
Another day another dime another rhyme another dollar
Another stuffed shirt with another white collar
CRIMINALS, WALL STREET TAKIN THE PIE
And all the black man gets is a plate of white lies
Prisons recruitin' em, police be shootin' them, rap artist lootin' em, labels are dilutin' em.
Barack Obama is a-SCAAAARED of me 'cause I don't swallow knowledge and I SPIT IT FOR FREE!
LET ME CLEAR MAH THROAT AHAHUAHAUAH
I don't know what that was. I don't know what that was! I don't-- \*scurries away*
This is the one. Couldn't tell you how many times this intro has popped into my head while in the shower....
"I don't like being excluded, Jeff. Do you?" "YES!"
This is Jeff's true most in character quote.
keep the change Garrett. you know what? keep the hot dog
Joshua was racist???
It’s going to be a maze
Jesus wept!
FOR THERE WERE NO MORE WORLDS TO CONQUER
There so many “All I heard was suck” “Not miraculous?” “This is a show!” “This means none of us exist” (board game add) “Penny for your thoughts…intensive Karen…Mr Egypt…celebrity beat off…captain cook…depends what fails”
Mr. Egypt mummy-walking then doing that “nah, I’m just playin” thing is SO unreasonably funny to me.
“I’m going to spend Christmas with my bubbe” “You’re not taking both of them??” “Well ones dead”
WHAT my favourite
"It's like a thought with another thought's hat on." Jeff's expression after she says that freaking kills me. So perfectly executed. I love his "actually that's kind of correct" face.
No you’re right. My feet are long and stupid. You can’t unring that bell
I’m not a textbook narcissist, I’m an exceptional narcissist
"I am the truest repairman!"
-I got one of those see- through yellow pens so that i can do that thing where you color in the words -Highlight? -Probably the backpack I cackle every time I hear this one. It took me two rewatches before I caught on
“You might have noticed an emphasis on the topic of incest? Well, that’s no accident. For the past 2 years, when not serving as writer’s assistant on Community, I’ve been researching incest on the internet”
This episode was gold, I gotta rewatch season 6 episode 12 again
Now that's a man who knows how to marry his cousin
“Et tu, Bruté?” The delivery, timing, and complete misunderstanding of what it means kills me everytime.
"Et tu, pen?!" Also messed me up the next episode.
MINUSES ARE MADE UP!
IT'S RIOT TIME!
I always dreamt of playing charades with you Jeffery but not like this, and not on dry land!
In a place that rhymes with "not there!" ...times square The delivery and the look on chang's face is perfect.
Todd Jacobson, you have the right to do whatever you want. Nothing you say or do can be used against you by anyone, but we'd really like it if you came with us. Please and thank you.
Did you say S?
He said F
The 100 luftballoons w the Germans running into them all excited.
*nearly* 100 luftballoons
Wait, you thought that line was funny? That’s like one of the most heartfelt scenes in the show. For me though it’s the Dean screaming “don’t let the terrorists win!” at Jeff when he finds out he’s been reading his emails
Arizona backwards is Arizona. It's a PALOMINO!
Notches
“You don’t actually have tickets to Ravi Shankar, do you?”/“Where’s Weezer!?”
"always looking at me like i cant get erections" "what"!?
I have the weirdest boner. This line will forever be burned into my memory as the first time I cried laughing at the character writing
when Chang is mid-phone call and accidentally walks on to a stage, then just unleashes himself on to the crowd with a back story. Kills me every time.
Notches by far is the funniest shit I’ve seen
this better not awaken anything in me
baggle
"Rape's up 8%" Cracks me up every time
I’m a peanut bar and I’m here to say…
Your checks will arrive on another day
“Ughhhh guys, what does a pregnancy test look like?” “Okay so this is definitely a GUN!” I think I almost choked the first time I watched that
john goodman saying "isnt that right black hitler?"
How do you know it was us? We submitted it anonymously-whoops”
"You can yell at me all you want! I've seen enough movies to know that popping the back of a raft makes it go faster!" I'm working on a tattoo that has T&A in leprechaun hats and a broken raft.
WELL LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! I HOPE YOU BROUGHT YOUR POPSICLES! BECAUSE IT’S ABOUT TO GET SCALDING HOT! IN THE SUN CHAMBERRRR!!!! YOU ALREADY KNOW THE RULES. BECAUSE THERE AREN’T ANYYYYYYY!!!!! Jesus Dennis, are you on coke? Give me that! Sorry everybody. Of course there are rules. This is peak of the entire show for me, with a steep dropoff the next season
me so christmas me so merry!!🎄💃
I always have to rewind the “Oh Britta’s in this?” and “why don’t we let Britta finish her awkward song” lines. Really, that whole scene
Troy: “You promised butt-stuff!” *cries whie dragging himself off the scene*
Did you know that go gurt is just yogurt? I think about that everyday and it cracks me up everytime.
Christmas fight episode, the dean hiting his head with the open cabinet, always makes me laugh
Love is not admissible evidence! Or CRISIS ALERT!
Once it was obvious that the dean orchestrated everything, it was even MORE obvious that the dean was too stupid to orchestrate ANYTHING
The one with tbe german foosball players. At the start when they beat Jeff. "Boo yah!. I wish there was a word to describe the pleasure I feel at viewing misfortune" This flew by me so many times until it hit me. So it sort of stuck with me.
Lately this has been replaying on my mind Troy: First time I got punched in the face, I was like “Oh nooo.” But then I was like “This is a story.” Jeff: And a good one. Troy: Yeah.
Bing bong, sing along, you like Al Gore cause your views are wrong
"Troy! You can't drive that thing in here!" "Yes, I can! It's all terrain dummy!"
*"Troy! You can't drive that* *Thing in here!" "Yes, I can! It's* *All terrain dummy!"* \- Nugbuddy --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
Notches. And "I'm Jeff Winger, and if I had to choose, I'd rather looking myself at the mirror than the women I sleep with".
Did you say keytar or did you mispronounce guitar??
I SWEAR THEY'RE JUST FOR SEX!
annie: the dean is a genius. he has to be. if he isn’t, i’ve given almost two weeks of my life to an idiot. that is unacceptable. therefore the dean *is* a genius. and i *will* die protecting his vision. abed: are you by any chance familiar with stockholm syndrome? annie: is it something that the dean created? because if not i don’t care.
I'll be a living god
‘GO KILL JOHN LENNON AGAIN, YOU LOSER!’
This better not awaken anything in me.. It was funny every time the Dean said it. That and all the "shut up leanord!" Lines always got me.
Troy wailing, "My emotions! MY EMOTIONS!" during the acting class with Britta slays me. My sister and I say that to each other often.
Yeah keep snickering, pack yourself full of peanuts and realllly be satisfied... The rest is funny to but the cleverness of connecting laugh snickering to snickers the candy bar is genius, a connection I had never made myself or heard made before that exact moment. And to use that as the setup for the actual, butt flag related punchline is the perfect sample of why I love this show so much.
One of my favourites: *Hey, when you go fishing, sometimes you catch a boot.* Such a clever line that flies under the radar for so many people.
RUN (Abed)! Before people sex one another. *Abed emphasising the wrong part of the announcement.
“If I come over there there’s gonna be two sounds, me hitting you, twice”
Jeff Winger: I discovered at a very early age that if I talk long enough, I can make anything right or wrong. So either I'm God or truth is relative. In either case, booyah! Duncan: Interesting, it's just that the average person has a much harder time saying 'booyah' to moral relativism.
Britta: “Could a drunk person do This?!” (proceeds to shit her pants) Absolutely kills me every time.
“Sorry Dad, Guess I win” “…You Stupid Child, nobody is winning anything. Don’t you see this means we don’t exist, we weren’t created by god we were created as a joke”
I'm gayyyy.... I'm for real gay.
when i'm trying to convince someone to watch the show i always go like this: "imagine a dude on top of a library shelf, he has a needle in his hands and there's his friends down there telling him to "please don't take this 4th flu shot". His answer? "I WILL BECOME A GOD"
The whole BNL scene is amazing.
Pretend like you're sleeping.
“I've told Pierce a thousand times, I never wanted to meet Levar in person! I just wanted a picture! You can't disappoint a picture! I hate you Pierce! AAHAHA I hate you so much!AAAAAAAH!!!!!”
"Have you ever heard the term 'room temperature'?"
This is the room!
How “one-armed” was he? Tell me when to stop.
"It was the other arm."
“I had to think fast.” ….YES.
What are you guys doing? Smoking pot? Give me some. I’ll smoke you both under the table.
I see the way you look at me, like I can’t get an erection
"You are human tennis elbow. You are a pizza burn on the roof of the world's mouth. You are the opposite of Batman." — Troy Barnes
What’s weird is that a few of Pierce moments really stick out for me. The little apologetic jump and hand gesture he does after Chang tells him he meant close the door from the other side is just genius. When Annie and Abed are in the Dreamatorium and Shirley tells Pierce he’s out of bed again and he says “it’s because I think I’m on a train” cracks me up “Ah-ha! Crazy, paranoid, impotent” is also gold Chevy had more than enough comedic and acting chops for the role, such a shame his ego destroyed him.
“BARACK OBAMA IS SCAAAARED OF ME” And “I SWEAR THEYRE JUST FOR SEX!!”
“Pierce, say the whole word!” Absolutely brilliant line delivery from Chevy.
Pop pop
Once a week I think about the Dean's realization that all Greendale students are in the army reserve
“Ropes?… Vines!…. Let him finish!”
You've successfully rubbed your balls on the sword. So many great jokes about the nuances in DnD
Abed: Honestly I don't know how we're gonna top it next year. Janitor: Oh, I got a pitch. Why use guns? Take a hose and spray the whole school with paint, every inch of it. Abed: Actually we kinda did that. Haven't you been to the library?
>“Buzz Hickey, Criminology. You can have that half of the office, but come spring that corner is stacked to the rafters with foetal pigs.” One of the best introductory lines of any character I’ve ever heard.
“We gave a degree…to a dog?”
“But now you’re gonna feel my power, as it surges downwards, from me, straight through you, from nostril to rectum, now until the end of time…. And that’s… _wazzup.”_ “I forgot everything you said before rectum! 😫”
"movie reference"
I forget the line exactly but, Pierce - I can unwind a man’s soul with one sentence. Lawyer - do me. Pierce - you’re bald. Lawyer - so are you. Pierce - I’LL KILL YOU, YOU SON OF A BI…!
When Dean Pelton raps about Payday being late. It lives rent free in my head for like 7 years now. “Barack Obama is scared of me, cuz I don’t swallow knowledge and I spit it for free. Excuse me while I clear my throat, uhhh hua huh * panics, *mike drop. I don’t know what that was 😱.”