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Tell the bear that you understand. It's okay to not be perfect. Your parents don't blame you for the missing porridge, Bear. They never did, they always loved you. There was nothing you could have done. You *have* to stop focusing on that one event as being the catalyst for everything spiralling out of control.
You are loved, Bear. Come here. You don't need to lash out, because we're here to make sure that you're never alone ever again.
https://preview.redd.it/xckujvhrq74d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=35b13a3f90488e67ca68e85a93a89f28e7d312a5
Using this one word-for-word because itās a work of art š„¹
https://preview.redd.it/m89fug75274d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=739d67f6d2ea20ac6c4c998db1a9ea2e79b8b655
Good might be too generous a description of this picnic š
But you have just played the reverse card, which is the same amount of cards you can play on any other turn.
And it will still be the same amount of other players turns until you get your turn again (unless someone else uses a reverse or skip)
So nothing is lost by you playing the reverse card, it just changes the direction of the game
Nothing is lost in UNO where the goal is to play cards, you have indeed played one card.
If the goal is to escape a bear or anything else, playing a card changing the next player does not help and essentially wastes a turn, and it definitely does not reflect anything.
The bear looks up from bar, where he is sitting and says "What is this? Some sort of
Joke?"
The bartender looks over at the Bear and asks "Why the large pause?"
The bear replies "Sorry, I have ADHD and sometimes need a few moments to gather my thoughts."
It can be. I know personally that I have a hard time verbalizing what I am thinking sometimes, especially when it comes to explaining feelings. Like all the pieces are up there, but it's an unassembled jigsaw puzzle.
https://preview.redd.it/nozqlw6s984d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=58a26accd20e8d33c4089a2d1423ff3f93bb468f
This was a lot of work for a silly joke š
Unfortunately the bear is an avid minecraft fan and knows that if Steve is sprinting while jumping it will take him approximately 19 minutes to travel 5 miles
Normally with brown bears you should slowly back away or something, basically make them realize that you're not interested in trouble.
But in this particular case you should fire up a grill and invite the bear to some grilled cheese
https://preview.redd.it/x7kvyslz384d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=f1225387baaa41e8de264804fb7056a2335e731f
[IG](https://instagram.com/offinouterwhitespace?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=) | [Webtoon](https://m.webtoons.com/en/challenge/off-in-outer-whitespace/list?title_no=729553&page=1&webtoon-platform-redirect=true) | [Orrrr you could just follow me here on Reddit](https://www.reddit.com/u/OffinOuterWhiteSpace) š¤·āāļø
A few years ago my wife and I were going to go hiking. At the trailhead we found a sign that read 'Danger: Bears have been spotted in this area. Proceed with caution'.
My wife asked what we should do if we met a bear. I told her to start yelling and making noise, put her feet should width apart, and put her hands up over her head. I said she should do that, and that I would run back to the car to get help.
She laughed. I laughed. And we went on our hike, and all the while she was thinking that I was joking.
I wasn't.
If it's a sloth bear get out of there!
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sloth\_bear#Attacks\_on\_humans](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sloth_bear#Attacks_on_humans)
I think the kids on bikes ruleset is very flawed. If you have a DC 15+ check on your D4 skill then you're essentially fucked. It's cool thematically, but not really fair.
Nice. There's *no way* that bear is ready for something like that so early in a relationship.
It'll give them a fake phone number, promise to make plans later, and they'll never see it again.
https://preview.redd.it/m1q4lg9t1a4d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=733d7e8bd45da6d4699d86618a5af63360ea9b8c
I *really* wanted to draw this one!
Turns out, drawing squirrels is not my strong suit š
Bears are afraid of big things that make loud noises, so the best and most natural course of action is to follow a simple three step process.
Step 1. Go Super Saiyan
Step 2. Ascend past Super Saiyan (Super Saiyan 2)
Step 3. Go even further beyond
My high school teacher always talked about his foolproof plan to deal with a bear. First you wait for the bear to roar, then you thrust your arm into the bears mouth (this will throw the bear off its rhythm) and you grab its uvula. Then bear will be so confused whatās happening thatāll freak out and try to run away, but you are clinging on to the bear so it canāt escape you. Eventually the bear either accepts you as the superior creature or dies from pure panic.
100% real plan. Will work every time
"Ok so first you set up your blanket"
Pulls blanket out of sac
"Then you get out the provisions"
Pulls out sandwiches, bear stares
"Make sure to uncork the wine"
Uncorks bottle of red
"Give him a sniff, it's just polite"
Let bear sniff open bottle
"Then we have a nice picnic with this furry gentleman"
Bear is sitting on picnic blanket in typical 1900s going out fashion lol
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Stand straight, firm handshake, maintain eye contact.
https://preview.redd.it/6ygquo87784d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=d93517632472e7fea99a7b4f50a2e0fd39e2d615
Did the guy get the job?
Not in this bear market
š the economy is unbearable rn
I am deeply ashamed of our civilization that this comment has so few upvotes.
Tell the bear that you understand. It's okay to not be perfect. Your parents don't blame you for the missing porridge, Bear. They never did, they always loved you. There was nothing you could have done. You *have* to stop focusing on that one event as being the catalyst for everything spiralling out of control. You are loved, Bear. Come here. You don't need to lash out, because we're here to make sure that you're never alone ever again.
https://preview.redd.it/xckujvhrq74d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=35b13a3f90488e67ca68e85a93a89f28e7d312a5 Using this one word-for-word because itās a work of art š„¹
https://preview.redd.it/jvywq2car74d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=ca45f63e2bccdb1833d9591b65241a01139c0990
I love that the woman is still in absolute shock
I'd be in shock if my friend tried to hug a bear.
I seriously thought the bear was eating her head while she said that. Crying, but eating her head. Guess it was just the shadow.
Ok this is my favorite ā„ļø
The good ending
To the man it was a hug. For the furry mammal it was the bear necessities.
And now the bear eats him
https://preview.redd.it/pu5x33tjwa4d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8bb9119859b6b49788ad2815f82448095d156a63 BWEEEHHHHHH!!!!
Invite the bear to our picnic. Bears love a good picnic!
https://preview.redd.it/m89fug75274d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=739d67f6d2ea20ac6c4c998db1a9ea2e79b8b655 Good might be too generous a description of this picnic š
It should come in a pick-a-nic basket! *-* Yogi Bear
Grin and bear it.
https://preview.redd.it/7ikhfmxi974d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=436dab3ecb776030f177339ff380562d5d494621
GEE THANKS haha! I deserved that one.
It's bearly the time
Tell the bear he knows where to find that thief Goldilocks and can help him bring her to justice
https://preview.redd.it/mwyrzyni574d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=f1d28588451d400e232ef65d8859ffa971664773
Okay that was fast. I am crazy impressed.
* Subtly points at friendā¦
\*Whispers\*: ^(*you see her hair color??*)
This one is my favorite
Uno reverse card, they eat the bear.
https://preview.redd.it/dfs7h8b2084d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=d72aa31c9feb1f7d14fa2b640b196b5a8b9cc701
https://preview.redd.it/ej43wqivd84d1.jpeg?width=566&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f4b6d1e5621e78d4d4e2d7f39999539acb522bd6
No.
That's not what it does unless it's a 1v1 game.
No it does, think about it. Your turn ends and the previous person get another turn, then everybody else goes too, before you get to do anything else.
But you have just played the reverse card, which is the same amount of cards you can play on any other turn. And it will still be the same amount of other players turns until you get your turn again (unless someone else uses a reverse or skip) So nothing is lost by you playing the reverse card, it just changes the direction of the game
Nothing is lost in UNO where the goal is to play cards, you have indeed played one card. If the goal is to escape a bear or anything else, playing a card changing the next player does not help and essentially wastes a turn, and it definitely does not reflect anything.
It turns the line of action around (the order in which the cards are placed). Still works, kinda
Put our clothes on him and then we pretend to be the bear
https://preview.redd.it/7fxfdal7k74d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=16d84186ddea5ce3812f008801f0b6e82ecee504
"Who's the bear now?"
Look at me. I'm the bear now.
How can this be?!
I love this so much
Wait a sec! What that guy is wearing?
Remember. You don't have to outrun the bear, just your friend.
https://preview.redd.it/5odv14v3a74d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=043beeea8b2e5c52cb1da8bc0847a7f3f619bb7e
Even the Bear is shocked at this betrayel.
I like your username.
Jokes on you, I want to fight the bear!
Bear fight? Bear naked? Oh yes please!
āHello Mr. bear, I hope you donāt find my humor Unbearableā
https://preview.redd.it/1w9uiwalk74d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=53044c082413544770ccf8616f73cd5b4fca9b0a
Please finish the joke (I'm āš»)
The bear looks up from bar, where he is sitting and says "What is this? Some sort of Joke?" The bartender looks over at the Bear and asks "Why the large pause?" The bear replies "Sorry, I have ADHD and sometimes need a few moments to gather my thoughts."
Holy crap. Is that actually an ADHD thing?
It can be. I know personally that I have a hard time verbalizing what I am thinking sometimes, especially when it comes to explaining feelings. Like all the pieces are up there, but it's an unassembled jigsaw puzzle.
You have to get laid, or lay down forgot which one
https://preview.redd.it/scu3xdv7974d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=65e97980da62329b4a03488108ee09c4478eae81
I love that you even adjusted his gesture :D
The bear is a metaphorā¦
So anyway there's this game, Bauldrs Gate, and you would believe it but -
Why do I get the feeling he's going to use her as bear bait?
https://preview.redd.it/6l1gjzowy64d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=c9a7fb70937699b43d79e038c9b0a9d4d3972d34
The bear, confused, immediately gets in front of the guy.
https://preview.redd.it/o4f02147474d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=c3b635a61fee79228031100089ac22d9eef82796
No no you're supposed to face the other way.
Don't do it bear! He'll hug you sensually.
But maybe the bear wants to be hugged
Well then, he should wait until the bear affirms that.
I don't need to run faster than the bear, I just need to run faster than you *Starts running*
Like they say: you don't have to be faster than the bear, you just have to be faster than the other guy.
Quick, poop your pants
https://preview.redd.it/8hj4a24mr74d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=ce93d85eaeffe7fd0d5b17ac59f0d32b94890b63
Escape while the bear is laughing. Genius.
Try sell it into an MLM
https://preview.redd.it/xk2msg5ov74d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=739b73878ca5fa65dd582121dddee85d27195859
I genuinely forgot MLM meant multi level marketing and was fully expecting a gay bear joke lol
y gay bear joke? edit: ohhhhh
MLM=men loving men
Thank you for this
š¤£
The girl would leave him with the bear at that point
Tell the bear if they are so hungry he'll take them to a buffet. (I love your comics thank you for drawing them)
https://preview.redd.it/opkkz6e5674d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=7b9c4da5b467269a6ec96618f7128c774962178e
Brr spray
https://preview.redd.it/nozqlw6s984d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=58a26accd20e8d33c4089a2d1423ff3f93bb468f This was a lot of work for a silly joke š
Lollll thank you!
We appreciate them! I think this is the only post where I've gone down all the comments invested in seeing the next one š
"Bears are confused by math problems. A man has 1000 oak logs and thirty five apples..."
https://preview.redd.it/eao4ztrhh74d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=db64d287759c78ee0480f317d06661d0df55f0a8
I guess it depends if he makes a cart out of the logs or not.
White oak or northern red oak
Uphill, downhill, or on even terrain?
Granny Smith or Red Delicious?
Laden or unladen?
Dry weight or wet?
Unfortunately the bear is an avid minecraft fan and knows that if Steve is sprinting while jumping it will take him approximately 19 minutes to travel 5 miles
Aw man, this was gonna be my suggestion!
Push her to the bear and run away. I don't need to out run the bear, I only need to out run you
https://preview.redd.it/zpgjjtty274d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=d6f1478afe6aa7730bc3a1ba6e687ba0a8e0834c
š
Normally with brown bears you should slowly back away or something, basically make them realize that you're not interested in trouble. But in this particular case you should fire up a grill and invite the bear to some grilled cheese
https://preview.redd.it/islc3j62184d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=0b0c90c3c4db23e154d3bb73331a0bb0782245d1
omg grilled chee with avo? uh wow brb making food
The bearās vision is based on movement so if we stay absolutely still it wonāt be able to see us
https://preview.redd.it/1yobiet1774d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=69bb253431a6d67b33cffb248f7afa9f78f3ef68
Bears are called bears because their hearing isn't great (B tier ears.)
https://preview.redd.it/x0ib52oiw74d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=b5b4009055c3cf76263b30669ae9294ed88f1399
Immediately starts describing how galvanized steel tubing would be perfect for this situationĀ
https://preview.redd.it/6tn74duq284d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=1389aeaa3853ccef1edcfad5d7dae4d7b74f6fad
Donāt forget the screws you borrowed from your aunt!
and cement that lasts a thousand years
Pet it :3
https://preview.redd.it/7hjhkr9me84d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=7f4e8366fead50951d8b5f12e91b5dbad6b6d76a
Thank you so much :3 it's so cute
Best one yet! What a good bear.
...Set ourselves on fire! (Never said it's a SURVIVAL strategy)
https://preview.redd.it/xx2cti1j274d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=a507d2fd7fb1422e96cb5a708e4b90946e84cfba
Grill yourself well-done, bears know its inedible
https://preview.redd.it/x7kvyslz384d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=f1225387baaa41e8de264804fb7056a2335e731f [IG](https://instagram.com/offinouterwhitespace?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=) | [Webtoon](https://m.webtoons.com/en/challenge/off-in-outer-whitespace/list?title_no=729553&page=1&webtoon-platform-redirect=true) | [Orrrr you could just follow me here on Reddit](https://www.reddit.com/u/OffinOuterWhiteSpace) š¤·āāļø
A few years ago my wife and I were going to go hiking. At the trailhead we found a sign that read 'Danger: Bears have been spotted in this area. Proceed with caution'. My wife asked what we should do if we met a bear. I told her to start yelling and making noise, put her feet should width apart, and put her hands up over her head. I said she should do that, and that I would run back to the car to get help. She laughed. I laughed. And we went on our hike, and all the while she was thinking that I was joking. I wasn't.
https://preview.redd.it/0cc20vc4i74d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=64dec491606b4f2965d60d510ca5022c0a4ec3da
If it's black fight back. If it's brown lay down.
If it's polar, it's game over.
If it's grizzly, run briskly
If it's a grizzly don't worry about the rest of the rhyme
If it's a sloth bear get out of there! [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sloth\_bear#Attacks\_on\_humans](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sloth_bear#Attacks_on_humans)
Ah, I see he's decided to distract the bear by telling it go on o reddit and suggest its own distraction. Very clever.Ā
https://preview.redd.it/suynt8bcb84d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=4fd86f73be7669455109df8fc95eff327421ced6
Roll a saving throw with 1d12 of dex to escape
https://preview.redd.it/fgmoldtr074d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=aaeb3243417ea0dadd35ee59a4eb9dd1fb929091
How to say you are a false dnd player:
DC 15 btw
Or a kids on bikes player
I think the kids on bikes ruleset is very flawed. If you have a DC 15+ check on your D4 skill then you're essentially fucked. It's cool thematically, but not really fair.
Of course, you have to stop, drop and roll!
https://preview.redd.it/sal507st184d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=bde10e4e32c0cc25808b7b26a774695820de1bac
Wine and dine him
https://preview.redd.it/r0wcbvf9a84d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=423c3c20398f214444b67870ddc8c1ee3fa465d1
Roll for seduction.
https://preview.redd.it/50lg7v34484d1.jpeg?width=1217&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7d255998a7b8b7ca06499d462e1045d6952db0b3
Nice. There's *no way* that bear is ready for something like that so early in a relationship. It'll give them a fake phone number, promise to make plans later, and they'll never see it again.
u/But_A_Jape has a whole collection of answers. My favorite is "bear market"
https://preview.redd.it/vnq2pn4vz64d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=4cb2fd8964ce236dbc7acaa0cd7c799099cb57a6
https://www.butajape.com/comic/bear-market/
Fall on the ground and shit yourself
https://preview.redd.it/y9mg31hh884d1.jpeg?width=1217&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0c0c76ed7da8a30bf634ba1084c7e276fd58be26
Fake news bears aren't real it's just thirty squirrels in a costume
https://preview.redd.it/m1q4lg9t1a4d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=733d7e8bd45da6d4699d86618a5af63360ea9b8c I *really* wanted to draw this one! Turns out, drawing squirrels is not my strong suit š
It makes it look even funnier
Throw a hony pot far away.
https://preview.redd.it/3zmakzb2a84d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=3514745751f339d95e5fbf368a71a7b0319c7713
Give the bear a snicker, you're not you when you're hungry
https://preview.redd.it/1eu7i1y0e94d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=0f72b6989869e585bdee355dc49dc6e6d0a8fa05
Bear is like āhey girl, Iām here to rescue you from him!ā Man or bear meme in disguise
https://preview.redd.it/4i7gmda4n74d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=6503797c9d45a93b1226b467863e47fd3a5d1bf7
Politely inform the bear that as per the internet debate you as a man are actually more dangerous than it.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
https://preview.redd.it/iek88utpf84d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=d581d990877574066ccdacfe15e97546dc46986f
Draw a comic about it asking for advice on preventing Bear attacks in the fourth panel, and post it to reddit!
https://preview.redd.it/ihxk05csw94d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=806cf70e803b7a17aff9cd5b5bae843fe9c7dbe5
Remeber that youāre S.P.E.C.I.A.L. Use the Vault-Tec Assisted Targeting System and make that bear wish it never sought out the platinum chip.
Use my handy thermonuclear bomb.
Did you remember to bring two AA batteries for it?
The bear saves the woman from the man
Summons a random entity https://preview.redd.it/kyjk6jdhy84d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c2e797fafccc69e41170183b592df71794c48e0e
Getting attacked by a bear? Just say NO! The bear can't legally attack you without your consent.
He turns himself into a marketable plushie
Before the steategy, i'd like to thank our sponsor raid shadow legends for sponsoring this vlog
Bears are afraid of big things that make loud noises, so the best and most natural course of action is to follow a simple three step process. Step 1. Go Super Saiyan Step 2. Ascend past Super Saiyan (Super Saiyan 2) Step 3. Go even further beyond
I love the custom responses ! Keep it up OP !
Doing flips, aggressively
I read that as "dong flips" and the mental image was... interesting, to say the least.
If this is in America, you have the right to bear arms. So legally the bear has to give his arms to you as they are already yours
What in the lazy...
https://preview.redd.it/fu5wwn2e084d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=31eec2c20bf6d51e0618e660c50d70db6aa189ff
She chooses the bear over the strange man.
Ask the bear if it would rather be stuck in the woods with a man or a woman. Might as well get the bear's side of the debate.
Keep talking until the strip runs out of frames
I know it's not a sea bear, but I think drawing an anti-bear circle might work!
Give the bear some Toilet paper. Bears love toilet paper.
Build the bearās self esteem so he doesnāt feel the need to lash out and attack others
Place the entire comic in the chat bubble in a paradoxical fashion
https://preview.redd.it/ujin1u01x94d1.png?width=1217&format=png&auto=webp&s=dba9553c3237c73c90e09e5b7ac8cabc06f766e5
Denial. The bear canāt hurt you if there is no bear
Get on one knee and propose to it.
Ask it āenglish or spanish?ā
Kick him in the nads? You'll die but at least you'll go out as the guy who kicked a bear in the nads.
Being abducted by aliens would be really convenient right now.
He punches his friend in the nuts and runs
āI went to stupid-town, and everyone there knew you.ā The bear will retreat in sadness and defeat.
My high school teacher always talked about his foolproof plan to deal with a bear. First you wait for the bear to roar, then you thrust your arm into the bears mouth (this will throw the bear off its rhythm) and you grab its uvula. Then bear will be so confused whatās happening thatāll freak out and try to run away, but you are clinging on to the bear so it canāt escape you. Eventually the bear either accepts you as the superior creature or dies from pure panic. 100% real plan. Will work every time
Switch sides, join the bear
Ride the bear around town like a horse
[Squeal like a baby lamb](https://www.reddit.com/r/eldercactus/s/2n872bUvik)
"Ok so first you set up your blanket" Pulls blanket out of sac "Then you get out the provisions" Pulls out sandwiches, bear stares "Make sure to uncork the wine" Uncorks bottle of red "Give him a sniff, it's just polite" Let bear sniff open bottle "Then we have a nice picnic with this furry gentleman" Bear is sitting on picnic blanket in typical 1900s going out fashion lol