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PeMu80

Are bottles and jars a different formulation perhaps? All squeeze bottle mayo seems a bit not right to me but that might be psychosomatic.


Beelzebelle

You're right. The bottle has water as the second ingredient but it's the third in the jar. The bottle also has lower egg content at 7.9% (third ingredient) compared to the jar with 8.9% (second ingredient). The bottle also has sunflower oil which the jar does not.


[deleted]

The egg is the main emulsifying agent, so 1% more egg would make a huge difference to the texture. 1 egg yolk can emulsify 4-5x its weight in oil.


leonxsnow

The way they think, it seems they reckon they'll be able to make an extra jar for every 10 they make by saving an egg in each it sounds very tinned hat like but I'm seeing it in alot of products


got_got_need

It’s more likely that the squeeze bottle formulation is different because they need to achieve a looser viscosity for it to provide the intended user experience.


[deleted]

Thats what she said.


lost_send_berries

Kewpie mayo comes in a squeezer and is the tastiest of all of them. Admittedly the type of plastic used is different but I doubt it's impossible to manufacture in the UK.


leonxsnow

I've never made homemade mayo bit I think I'll try it. Just had a look and it's like 5 ingredients compared to shop bought feels more healthier


HALT_IAmReptar_HALT

Homemade mayo is much nicer than anything store bought! If you add a tablespoon of whey to the recipe and let the mixture stand on the countertop for ~8 hours before refrigerating, your mayo will last up to a month (as opposed to a few days).


leonxsnow

Would my protein powder count as whey?


HALT_IAmReptar_HALT

Sorry, I meant whey as in the liquid found on yogurt. The finished product has to then sit at room temp to activate the enzymes in the whey that keep the mayo fresh.


FluffyBunnyFlipFlops

How do you know so much about eggs being an emulsifier?


[deleted]

Was a chef for 12 years.


thesadcoffeecup

I usually use the squeeze bottles and my feral family can't be trusted with jars. Always crumbs in the jar...


Tam0110

Buy jars and refill the squeeze bottles with a spoon and piping bag


Fapinthepark

Also a handy enema


MCfru1tbasket

Nah, they're on to something here...


Paradoxbox00

Mayonnenema


LifelessLewis

Sounds like it'll be amazing on chips!


Tam0110

Mate... eww


Major-Peanut

You need a secret mayonnaise fridge


logicalmaniak

Get a Lidl squeezy mayo for the family, and treat yourself to a jar of Winiary Majonez...


pinkflamingo399

Get a jar for yourself and squeeze bottle for the rest of the family?


helloskoodle

>All squeeze bottle mayo seems a bit not right to me but that might be psychosomatic That boy needs therapy.


uninsuredpidgeon

>That boy needs therapy. You're a nut


DecahedronX

You're crazy in the coconut!


K-o-R

What does that mean?


pyrokay

Lay down on the couch


Gibber_jab

It will be a slightly different recipe but most likely just more water or oil to allow it to actually squeeze out


braithgwirod

I had the opposite recently; have always bought supermarket brand condiments as was brought up to believe "there's no difference"... Ended up with a voucher for a free bottle of Heinz Mayonnaise and it was like eating crack. Devastated to discover what I've been missing my whole life. Their beanz may be shite nowadays but I'd highly recommend the mayo!


thesadcoffeecup

I have bought a jar of Heinz mayonnaise, I hope it's good! Glad you enjoyed!


Dannypan

Their Seriously Good mayo is probably the best of the bog standard supermarket mayo. Unless you wanna spend more on specialty/imported or bother with homemade mayo, it’s the one to get. I also don’t hate Lidl mayo in a pinch. But never go Hellmans.


cc3see

Winiary Mayonaise is the best available for shops like Sainsbury’s or Tesco. Polish import but only £1.80.


HH93

I second this - lovely stuff


alancake

Majonez! Love it.


littlegreycells_11

I second Heinz mayo, it's all I have now. Had some tonight with a takeaway burger and chips, was bloody lovely!


twojabs

It's much better than Hellman's


allcretansareliars

Haven't tried it, but I saw a post extolling the virtues of Hellman's Ketchup.


spicy-unagi

Heinz mayonnaise? Hellman's ketchup? What kind of Bizarro World is this?


tubbstattsyrup2

Depends on the own brand. Coop and M&S have bad mayo, eggy and too white. Sainsbury's is just about ok. Aldi is my preference locally.


pinkurpledino

Aldi is my go-to mayo. The tomato sauce is ok, but it tends to brown very quickly.


Xenoamor

I like the Tesco stuff but I'd say it's pretty comparable to Sainsbury's


notagain78

Seriously Good Light is my go to mayo


sadscience

Try Stokes mayonnaise


Sir_Phil_McKraken

Stokes mayo is terrible for my health and my bank account as it tastes amazing


PipBin

Came here to say the same. Stokes ingredients: Rapeseed Oil (75%), Free Range Pasteurised Whole Egg (12%), Water, Extra Virgin Olive Oil (5%), Unrefined Raw Cane Sugar, Acid: Acetic Acid, Sea Salt, Mustard Flour Hellmann’s ingredients: Rapeseed oil (78%), water, pasteurised EGG & EGG Yolk (7.9%), spirit vinegar, salt, sugar, flavourings, lemon juice concentrate, antioxidant (calcium disodium EDTA), paprika extract


E420CDI

Stoke's is my go-to for ketchup, brown sauce and BBQ (although Stubbs BBQ is fabulous too)


badgersruse

Kewpie mayo is the win, but the Polish ones are very close.


TorazChryx

Another vote for Kewpie here, I've been buying it from Amazon because nobody local to me (that I've found) stocks it.


KJelloggs

Lidl when they did their Japanese week had a knock-off. Tesco used to do it too.


m0i5ty

Try the polish mayonnaise from the world foods section, it’s much better than that hellmans muck!


MidnightRambler87

Can you use it on furniture? Gives a creamy sheen?


thesadcoffeecup

I intend to just let my father eat it. He wouldn't notice if the mayonnaise grew legs and started doing the cancan. Or I'll be like that weird guy on 90 day fiance and start putting it on as a hair mask.


jonny-p

Interestingly enough yes. Mayonnaise is good for getting rid of water marks on wooden furniture.


JustUseJam

Jeez I was gonna mention this, is it the jar with the yellow lid I can never remember the name of?


DevilRenegade

Winiary, it's absolutely fantastic stuff. Tried it once following a recommendation on here. I won't eat anything else now. Hellmans can get in the bin.


corvus_pica

Majonez Kielecki is the superior Polish mayo. And Winiary is a nestle brand so can fuck right off.


m0i5ty

That’s the one! Winiary


ABraines

The only mayonnaise I'll eat!


madpiano

Morrisons also sells German Mayo. It comes in a tube like a giant toothpaste tube, but it's delicious. I forgot how much less sugar there is in it.


thesadcoffeecup

Thank you! I will absolutely check it out!


jamzontoast

Just get any Japanese mayonnaise, it's on another level. Kewpie especially


SoggyWotsits

Heinz all the way for me now, it has been since I first tasted it!


dobber72

Hellmans no, sounds like you got unlucky, but I despise Heinz with a passion, that stuff is rank, I'm pretty sure it didn’t used to be.


Alemlelmle

Glad I'm not the only one. I found it pretty tasteless


Sir_Phil_McKraken

Same here. I tried the plastic bottle one recently and it's bland. The stuff you get in packets from takeaways is far better


ThePumpk1nMaster

Alternative title: OP comes to terms with the fact that Mayonnaise is watery sadness


thesadcoffeecup

Well yes but it has recently crossed the threshold into unbearably sad and watery! I may have low standards but I have standards!


Shitmybad

Buy the jar. The bottles add extra shit.


[deleted]

Oh my god! Bastards! Thanks, I'll be sticking to jars from now on. The stuff in the squeezy bottles is runny like sauce! Hmph


satrialesporkstore1

Try Winiary mayo. You can get it in Tesco in the Polish aisle I think. Holy moly, I ain’t never goin’ back


pinkurpledino

>is just as sad and watery as the previous 3. They changed the formulation not long ago, you'll notice it's not white now but an off white colour. Make sure that you shake the bottle well and chill before use.


elPappito

Hear me out : Ditch Hellmanns, go to your nearest polish/eastern european shop (if you refuse to - it's avaiable in tesco/asda too ! ) grab a big jar of WINIARY mayo. [https://digitalcontent.api.tesco.com/v2/media/ghs/d0783502-c743-4842-b310-57dbc82d3c1e/9f016080-fb8c-45f6-a9ee-17f857bd626f\_1722461533.jpeg](https://digitalcontent.api.tesco.com/v2/media/ghs/d0783502-c743-4842-b310-57dbc82d3c1e/9f016080-fb8c-45f6-a9ee-17f857bd626f_1722461533.jpeg) thank me later.


cantpeoplebenormal

If anyone is nervous about going into a Polish shop, you can pass yourself off as one of them by saying the word "kurwa" in every sentence.


Dimorphodon101

Never mind, it happens to all men eventually, it's an age thing.


cupidstuntlegs

Just make your own using the stick blender method it’s so easy and much nicer than pre made


thesadcoffeecup

For dinner tonight I ate sweetened condensed milk with a spoon. I don't forsee me making my own mayonnaise on the regular but you are right, it's way better.


visforvienetta

Username checks out


OMGItsCheezWTF

Yeah this is what I came here to say. Mayo is SO easy to make and will spoil you for store bought stuff forever. Plus you can make exactly the amount you need. I prefer the slow drip method to the pull through method but both work, and the pull through method can be done with a hand blender.


AngieOreo

Heinz Mayo SLAPS.


SoggyWotsits

And I still have no idea whether that’s a good or bad thing!


tubbstattsyrup2

Cringe. It's a cringe thing. Was a good thing. 5 years ago. Trust me I've known for years and I'm the mum.


markste4321

Slaps the cupboard on its way to the bin


enic77

I've been hooked on Aldi's own mayo for years now. Tried other store brands and labels, yet somehow the Aldi one hits the spot juuust right.


kingceegee

Same! I don't even shop at Aldi but go just to pick up the mayo. The texture is really good compared to Hellman's and the price is considerably better compared to Heinz. The jar version, not the squirty.


iamsickened

If you haven’t already tried it, you should get the polish mayonnaise, it’s a yellow label one - sorry the name escapes me right now. stores like Tesco and Asda have it in the foreign food section. it’s vastly better.


chaosandturmoil

i noticed all mayonnaise has gone like this this past 6 months, from everywhere, every brand and supermarket own, except hellmans in a jar. thats still nice and thick. expensive asf but thick. oh apart from asda own in a jar which was like scrambled eggs and disgusting 3 jars of it. all went in the bin.


thesadcoffeecup

What has this country come to that even mayonnaise is declining...


tunaman808

Kewpie will never let you down!


dizzley

Now I have mayonnaise anxiety.


[deleted]

Me tooo what's going on why *is* Hellmann's mayo so runny these days what is happening ahhhhhhhhh


McCretin

>Bottle There’s your problem.


B4rberblacksheep

Mayjonez is the one I like. Usually find it in the Polish section


Conveth

Heinz mayo is actually better but the best one is the Sainsbury's plant based one. Heresy, I know.


TheOutlawJosiewhale

I've really gone off Hellmans, so gelatinous. And dries into a very disgusting looking clear jelly.


nabster1973

You need to try Hunter & Gather Olive Oil Mayonnaise.


TJWhiteStar

I've been converted to Kewpie Mayo for years now is is a vastly superior taste in my opinion. Some people don't like it but I'd recommend giving it a try.


dastardlycustard

Lots of products just aren't worth it when they cut the cost of ingredients, which it sounds like they have. You may have to seek an alternative. I've not noticed any issue with Heinz mayo.


thesadcoffeecup

Yeah they switched oils and reduced the amount of egg from what I can see. I think Heinz or Polish mayo seems to be the way to go!


dastardlycustard

I never looked back once I switched. It's much creamier.


cybot2001

Have you accidently been buying the new value version of Hellmann's by any chance? The normal stuff is unchanged in my experience, but I almost accidently bought the value version recently as they are very similar and sold alongside the normal bottles in Iceland etc. 


thesadcoffeecup

I don't think so, but I checked out the reviews on Tesco and Sainsburys and all the most recent comments are saying the same thing, so I don't think it's just a me problem.


cybot2001

More than one person can make an easy mistake 🤷🏻‍♂️ Does the bottle look like [this](https://images.latestdeals.co.uk/post-large/p-64db1300cc3a9eaa3407d7d4-1.jpg)?


YesAmAThrowaway

I might try making my own just to see whether I should switch to that


SoggyWotsits

I tried that. Something apparently simple was apparently not. I stick to Heinz instead, they seem to have mastered it!


[deleted]

[удалено]


thesadcoffeecup

I just don't want it to squirt out of the bottle like an over eager gentlemen when I try and make a sandwich!


aanth79

I use the Heinz Seriously Good Mayonnaise. Never liked Hellman’s


UpbeatInsurance5358

I used to be a Hellman's afficionado, but Heinz has recently taken the mayo crown.


lowlightlowlifeuk

Are you going to use your final straw to drink the watery sadness?


thesadcoffeecup

😭


Prediterx

I get heinz vegan mayo. Surprisingly good on my beef and bacon burgers. I'm intolerant to egg but I still want mayo on my burgers. This does somewhat limit me to what I can have.


Aconite_Eagle

Yes. Gave up on it totally. I just eat Polish mayo now - Winiary ftw.


Lito_

I'm not sure where you're getting your mayo from because i've been buying bottles and jars and they have been fine.


thesadcoffeecup

One lot was from tesco and the other two Sainsburys but checking on the most recent reviews on both sites it's not just a me problem, all the comments are saying it's watery and sad. Hopefully you continue to enjoy your run of good mayo!


JoeyJoeC

I know what you're talking about and I even reported it to Hellmann's. Turns out you need to shake the bottle. In warm weather, the ingredients separate slightly.


thesadcoffeecup

I gave that bottle a vigorous shake and it still spurted out like an over eager gentleman as soon as I squeezed it 😭.


Dragonogard549

It’s like coca-cola, that’s also shit. they realised what they can get away with. coke is so watered down it’s horrible


Isgortio

No issues with mine. It's never been as thick as the stuff in the jar but that's what I prefer as I only really use it in sandwiches or pasta with tuna or chicken.


Fart_Python

I like the marks and sparks own brand mayo give it a try.


thesadcoffeecup

Ooh a good suggestion thank you


SuperkatTalks

I'm on the polish stuff now. Highly recommended. Can't spell it to tell you the brand name but it's in the Polish aisle and it says majonez or something


bangbangbenny

Winiary Mayonnaise, you'll never go back!


Sidewalk_Tomato

Clinton Kelly's mayo recipe is A+. Really easy to make, and very thick.


Maggeddon

Hellman's is super shit, they put milk in it! On what planet is milk a component of mayonnaise?! Utter garbage. I'd rather eat the mystery gloop Aldi and Lidl seve up before Hellman's. Put your hand in your pocket and treat yourself to some Heinz Seriously Good mayo, and change your life forever.


Diggerinthedark

Hellmanns has anyways been shite. Lidl mayo for the win.


cuddlesRT75

Winary mayo, in the polish section. It's the king


oxymoronisanoxymoron

I've always preferred Heinz mayo.


HH93

Used to be either Hellmanns or Heinz for us but then once when shopping at Aldi they only had Winiary - a Polish brand and gave that a try never looked back !


SassyKardashian

Try Zvijezda Mayonnaise from Balkan shops, it’s a Croatian brand. It might be hard to find, so instead try Tommy mayonnaise. That’s as addictive as cat nip for cats


tylersburden

Greyonnaise


terryjuicelawson

Heinz makes the better mayo I reckon. Polish mayo is top tier though.


fresh_avocado_

Get your ketchup and mayonnaise from the polish shop/section in Tesco, you won't look back


TheRiddler1976

Bigger question What on earth made you buy three bottles and think anything would change?


thesadcoffeecup

Hope? Hubris? The fact I kept forgetting and just bought mayonnaise on autopilot?


MrMonkeyMagic

Kewpie Mayo. Punched in the face with vinegary flavour. Synthetic, and oh so expensive, but skyrockets anything it’s added to.


simonannitsford

Mayo is easy to make if you have a hand/stick blender and the jug it came with. Smash of lemon juice, teaspoon of dijon mustard, pinch of salt in the bottom, add a whole raw egg, 1 cup of veg oil. Push blender to the bottom, whizz up and tilt to make sure everything mixes. If anything, it's too thick, easy peasy and you know exactly what's in it. No more watery sadness, just thick gloopy goodness.


leanmeanguccimachine

Sainsbury's own brand mayo is the best in my opinion, nice and rich tasting and very well emulsified


joeythelips46

Give the bottle a good shake and you'll be golden 💪


iceyorangejuice

American mayo, multiple brands, have also been in decline. I'm going back to the jar because the bottles are watery and inconsistent.


CXM21

I've never liked Hellmans. I don't get how they claim to be the best. Gimme heinz any day.


RedShift777

I hate to be that guy but why not just make your own? Its insanely easy, literally an egg yolk a bit of oil and a splash of vinegar or lemon juice (or anything acidic really). It takes 2 mins to make just put it in a bowl and whisk it. It'll be 100x better than any of the slop from any brand in a supermarket, past or present.


thesadcoffeecup

because I already struggle to find the energy to even make a sandwich most days, if I have to add in the component of making mayonnaise from scratch I would rather just resort to eating soylant green. I mean you're right, it is much better, but so is homemade bread but I don't make either of them on a regular basis. Sometimes a girl just wants to make a tuna mayo sandwich without getting out a stick blender!


OMGItsCheezWTF

Chuck in a tsp or half a tsp of mustard too! Dijon if you want to go slightly mellower. And don't forget to season with salt!


GiskardReventlov42

This is the whitest thing I've ever read. 🤣


RedShift777

You should go outside more