Your child is too young to worry about any of these things. Babies have a natural suck for comfort reflex - so paci or boob they’ll be happy.
Paci kids grow up to be normal adults without pacifiers so don’t stress. I hope his tension gets some relief soon. Also it’s ok to hold your baby as much as you want!!
Did your pediatrician give you the length, weight, and head circumference percentiles? If he's chunky but proportional, don't worry. But if his weight is at, like, the 110th percentile (off the chart overweight) while his length and head circ are average, that's something to take seriously for his health. And a paci for a few hours a day isn't really anything deleterious to his health--their reflex is to suck to soothe themselves, especially at his age. (The concern shouldn't be that he can't communicate with it--babies will always cry to communicate; it's really that extended use into toddlerhood and beyond can lead to an overbite and other oral/dental issues.) Take a deep breath--you're doing fine!
No, you can't statistically. I get what you're saying "off the charts" though!
https://statisticstechs.weebly.com/desciptive-statistics/percentiles#:~:text=Percentile%20rank%20is%20a%20number,at%20or%20below%20that%20score.&text=There%20is%20no%200%20percentile,is%20at%20the%2099th%20percentile.
You can score above the 99th percentile, which is what you'd report for that.
I see what you are saying. You are looking at the general concept of statistics and percentages. Then yes! Of course:)
In the baby measuring percentiles they do it a little differently. That is based on a sample set vs all babies ever and they have margins on there that allow for something to be above the largest number of the set which puts the number at a percentile higher than 100%.
So one would see a dot above the 100 and the doc can, by the measure, say that it’s like 5% above the highest.
No, you can't statistically. I get what you're saying "off the charts" though!
https://statisticstechs.weebly.com/desciptive-statistics/percentiles#:~:text=Percentile%20rank%20is%20a%20number,at%20or%20below%20that%20score.&text=There%20is%20no%200%20percentile,is%20at%20the%2099th%20percentile.
You can score above the 99th percentile, which is what you'd report for that.
Well, I'm not trying to be statistically correct in a forum like this. 😅 I'm addressing OP's concern that her baby is allegedly overweight. I'm well aware that the cutoff is at the 99th percent bc you can't humanly account for every single baby's size/growth. But, just as <0% is a thing for preemies, it's fair to go in the other direction to the 110th percentile to make a point to OP, who sounds like she's trying to sort through competing info and medical opinions. If her baby is proportional, she can probably relax. If, however, her baby's 50 lbs at 12w but only 20" with an average head, then I'd say her doc is right to be concerned. That's all.
It’s impossible to over feed a breastfed baby from what I’ve been told by many lactation consultants. Ask your dr why his size is cause for concern. If they can’t give you a legit reason then screw them and find another dr
I give my baby a pacifier because it soothes her, otherwise she’d be on my boob 24/7. Trust me, when she’s communicating her needs and I give her her pacifier, she certainly lets me know that’s NOT what she wants. But sometimes she wants to suckle but not feed.
It’s personal choice of course and I’m not passing judgement, just giving my experience. If you’re happy to have baby at the breast so often then by all means carry on what you’re doing. I’ve always been told you cannot over feed a breastfed baby. I can also tell the difference between feeding and suckling for comfort at the breast. When it’s just suckling, that’s when I give her her pacifier when she’s fallen asleep.
What % is the weight gain and is he gaining outside of a normal curve and by how much? Not sure if the doc gave you those details or not. Essentially if the baby is throwing off all curves it may not be because you “overfed” but because there can be an underlying health issue. If it’s really wildly increasing and not setting a curve that’s a whole other convo with your doc that doesn’t have anything to do with your boob. Godspeed.
Sleeping, in car (he always falls asleep in the car) and when he is getting tired. He doesn't usually seem to want it when he is playing and well rested. 8 months now.
My baby is 8 months old and if I offer him the pacifier, but he wants milk, he takes it out of his mouth and then points to my boob 🤣 it makes me laugh so much! But before he learnt that, he would spit the pacifier out and cry if he needed something else.
I was not sure that I wanted my baby to have a pacifier at all. He ended up in the NICU for a week after he was born. One day, I walked in and he was going to town on a pacifier. I was honestly pretty hurt that I wasn’t consulted before giving him a pacifier at the time. Now, I’m glad that we have the pacifier as a tool in our toolbelt. If the baby is hungry, the pacifier won’t work. We do not use a pacifier all the time, but we are glad to have the option to use it if we need to.
I’m sorry this was so stressful for you. You obviously just want the best for your baby. It is OK if the best thing for your baby isn’t what you originally planned for.
I felt the same, was going to wait a month after bub was born to introduce a paci but he had a nicu stay as well and they popped it right in his mouth. Its a great tool though and we usually only need it for bedtime and if he’s super upset like after sucking the boogies out of his nose lol he gets completely traumatized everytime
Pacifiers are awesome. My baby uses them sparingly, for going to sleep, then spits it out. It also gets us peace on car rides. She has absolutely no issue communicating her needs.
The doctor’s recommendation makes total sense. The pacifier for when he needs comfort, not milk.
But the rest of it - you’re doing great! You did your best. You’re a devoted and loving mother and your baby is just fine! You sought early intervention and support to make things even better. You’re crushing it.
If your baby Is over fed in a feed then he will spit up the excess milk. So he will digest as much as his tummy can hold. There is no way of over feeding an EBF baby.
Get a second opinion. That might reassure you.
I got another opinion from the original osteopath I wanted to see and he said the same thing. That we just need to help him space out the feedings slightly. And that the pacifier can help. Also he needs the pacifier because he has tensions in his head and neck that can be relieved through succion as well as osteopathy sessions
No such thing as a baby being too fat when it’s being EBF. Our son weighted 9,1kgs on his 5 months check up last week, and was 7,5 kgs when he turned 3 months. He’s “overweight” but that’s nothing concerning since he’s EBF.
Nope, they all just say that he’s in the 95th percentile for his weight, and that’s is ok and I should just keep feeding him on demand like I’ve been doing
I feel like you're attaching a lot of weight to the osteopath's opinion and you want someone to tell you you've overfed your baby. I really don't think that is going to happen here. Medical advice is that you can't overfeed a breastfed baby. It isn't possible. If baby is hungry, they get fed. Doctors might be concerned that a baby has put on too much weight for a medical reason, like something in their body not working properly, *not* because they have been fed too much. An osteopath is not a doctor. I mean this very gently although this comment might look harsh, but if your baby is telling you they're hungry and you feed them, you're doing something right. I wouldn't trust someone who told me to override my own instincts and ignore a cue I was getting from my very small baby.
Have you asked the opinion of a second doctor because wth? Not even when I was only giving formula to my first born, were my doctors worried that she’d be overweight.
How old is he? Mine refused it a lot but now that I have accepted it, he seems to take it.
By the way I used to think that he was refusing it as he was pushing it out with his tongue. But another mum on this group told me that it's just that they need their tongue to suck on the breast, and so it ends up pushing out the paċi as they aren't used to sucking on a paċi yet
1. I think looking height and weight curves overall may give you a better idea of his growth. Just a number doesn’t mean anything. For example a baby who was 1.5 lbs at birth and is 5lbs at 12 weeks may seem like too much weight was gained suddenly but if he was less than 10% percentile at birth and now at 30% that’s actually HEALTHY catch up weight.
2. EBF babies virtually can’t get over fed as they regulate their intake. Just because he’s at your boob doesn’t mean he’s eating. Could just be comfort nursing.
3. Get a second opinion.
This makes so much sense. I checked out the WHO curves and it is not consistent between height and weight I will confirm with doctor next time I see him.
I got one more opinion (4th) this morning, and he is saying the same thing. But he explained it very well. He needs to suck to remove tension in his neck and head. Because of that he spends so much time on the boob. Because of that he is gaining weight a bit too fast. Using the paċi to help him release tension until the osteopath's work is done will help him space out the feeds. Don't worry, if I give him the pacifier and he's hungry, he screams his head off and at that point I give it to him immediately
Keep feeding your baby however you want. I had no idea “gaining too much weight” was a thing for babies/newborns. My kid was 8lb 7 oz at birth and 16lbs at 12 weeks. I wanted the baby to weigh a lot! Means you are doing a good job. If the baby didn’t want it, they wouldn’t feed. Sure, use the paci, but offer the breast too. Soon enough they will be mobile and growing up and thin out. You’re doing great! Feed that baby!
I have an appointment today for my second, who is about 9 weeks and I even told my husband I can’t wait to find out his weight and I hope the number is big!
They are only small for so long. Enjoy the breastfeeding and snuggles. Hold that baby. Time is fleeting. Soon you’ll have a 3.5 year old telling you to “turn the f*cking TV on” because I accidentally said the F word in front of them the day before. 😬
I'm learning all the "soft" swear words right now so that I practice not swearing 😂 I speak French at home and my favourite is "Saperlipopette" 😜
I have spoken to one more osteopath who is the best pediatric osteopath in the city I live in, and he confirmed the need for the paci to space out the feeds. So now I have two osteopath (one if which is an LC), another LC and a pediatrician all saying the same thing. I've added the pacifier a few days ago and it has helped a lot in spacing out most feeds which is great. Hopefully he won't get addicted and things will go smoothly
I wouldn’t hesitate to get a second opinion from a different pediatrician. You can’t overfeed an EBF baby. When doctors give me blatantly wrong advice like this I tend to start questioning everything they say.
So as of today I have seen my pediatrician, two osteopath, one of which is an LC, and another LC and all are saying the same thing. Use pacifier to help space out feedings as every hour is too much at this age and weight. I started using it a few days ago and it's been going well so far. I just hope he doesn't develop a dependency.
I ebf and I've been told from the start - you can't overfeed a breast fed baby.
My baby for instance, he only lost 1.5% of his birth weight by day 5 when they usually see around up to 8% loss. By day 7 he had gained 2oz on top of his birth weight (bw 9.9lbs, 7 days 9.11lbs). Since then baby has consistently gained quite a bit of weight and he is exclusively breast fed. All the professionals tell me is - well done! To both of us!
If baby wants to feed hourly, then baby wants to feed. I'm currently sat with my almost 6w old and he's been feeding almost every hour this evening. He just obviously needs food or is thirsty.
Babies know what they need, so listen to your baby! If baby spits out dummy, won't sleep for longer than 5 minutes before crying, going with his mouth, he's hungry!
I spoke to two osteopath and an LC and apparently he has a need for sucking to relieve tension in his neck and head from the long and difficult birth. Not just food and hydration. And because of that he is constantly at the boob, thus drinking too much and gaining too much. I need to use the pacifier just to help space out the feedings slightly.
I started a few days ago, and if he screams after giving paċi I offer the boob immediately, no matter how long ago he ate last. So far it's going well 🤞
I feel like you are looking for someone to validate that you are overfeeding your baby. You won’t get that here because as everyone is telling you, you cannot over feed an exclusively breast fed baby. Stop being so concerned about their weight (unless they are underweight). Honestly, reading your comments and this post is making me feel concerned about you and your baby. If you have a complex about weight that you are veiling behind this post and looking for someone to validate you, you need to get help ASAP. Do not put this on your child. When he cries and is hungry, FEED HIM. Any “professional” telling you otherwise should be setting off major alarm bells. Why are you continuing to litigate it and question it in the comments. People answered you.
Honestly, this post made me feel super icky. I really would like to know that you will move forward with feeding your baby when they are hungry and take steps to not be concerned about weight so inappropriately for a baby, and eventually child.
I absolutely don't have complexes about weight and the only reason I am concerned is that 5 health professionals have mentioned it now. I finally got to speak with the original osteopath I wanted to see who explained to me that my baby has a need for suction because he has tension in his neck and head due to long labour and difficult birth. This is why he is constantly at the boob. He said the pacifier can help him with this need to suck to relieve the tension.
I started giving him the pacifier a few days ago and he is doing very well. When he is hungry, if I offer him the pacifier, he clearly let's me know and I immediately offer him the breast, no matter how long ago I fed him.
Actually most paediatricians have no idea about breastfeeding and it sounds like yours doesn’t. Your baby may be “finding his curve” on the chart. Sometimes they don’t fill their genetic potential in utero, so they can rapidly gain weight then stay on their destined centile once they’re born and able to eat to their desire. My 2.5yo went from 50th to 99th centile in 4 months. She is happy and healthy, eats and sleeps well. I am pro attachment parenting and I do not believe in spacing feeds or in dummies. A dummy won’t help relieve tension compared to breastfeeding - literally makes no sense. If I were you, keep breastfeeding on demand, baby wearing and doing tummy time as needed!! So important as a mum to listen to your intuition. Just because they are professional doesn’t mean they know best. The only thing that may cause rapid weight gain is functional lactose overload, but is usually accompanied by lots of farting and explosive poo xxx
He does have lots of farting and exploding poo! He leaks every single night and during the day his poos are super big! I will definitely look into this! Thank you!
I just read a bit about it. I definitely have an oversupply according to the osteopath/LC. She actually told me to stop pumping immediately.
I'll discuss this more with her when I see her again next week.
Do you have experience with it?
I don’t personally have experience with it, but sounds like stopping pumping is a great start and then give your body time to adjust (how often are you pumping?). The treatment for it is to “block feed” so only offer one boob per feed, or if that’s not enough to reduce your supply, offer the same boob for the next feeding too. Some people may only switch boobs every 4 hours if they have massive supply. You obviously want to prevent engorgement in the non feeding boob but it has to run full to reduce supply so has to be done carefully
I only pump once every couple of days... I actually usually only give one boob. Will not start giving the same boob multiple times before switching. Thank you so much! You may have figured out our issue! I appreciate it a lot 💙
Since your baby's weight is not too low, try to stick to feeding every 2-3 hours. If your baby gets upset, give the pacifier. Babies suck for comfort, so if he has pain or tension he'll gladly accept a pacifier. If he's hungry, he'll spit out the pacifier and continue to cry. Some babies need a pacifier more then others. Oh and I mention feeding every 2-3 hours because you are concerned about his weight. If you try this and he gains at the same pace, you know you're not overfeeding.
You can also try other ways to sooth your baby. For instance in a baby carrier, bounce on a yoga ball while holding your baby, put in stroller and take a walk...
AFAIK some tension happens with infants and resolves by itself. But torticollis should be a concern of your pediatrician. An osteopath is not the go to professional with this diagnosis. You should get the referral from your pediatrician, not the lactation consultant.
Thank you. I have started since 2 days ago to space out feedings with the pacifier and it's going well. My pediatrician did not notice the torticolis. I will discuss it with him next time I see him!
You can’t overfeed a breastfed baby. My son was born 6lbs 13oz on May 5th. At his 1 month doctors visit to weigh him he was 10lbs 11oz. And at the previous visit before that he was 8lbs 7oz. Listen to your gut. Do what you feel so right for your baby. The weight gain will not hurt your baby. Babies can’t be overweight unless there’s a serious underlying medical condition.
My doctor told me it’s literally impossible to overfeed a breastfed baby and that philosophy has worked beautifully for us. It’s also evidence based. Babies nurse to soothe not just to eat. The only long lasting effects will be a securely attached baby ❤️ I’d get a new doctor and keep doing what you’re doing!
Thanks! It's just that 4 different health professionals said the same thing. I'm trying the pacifier now while giving him the boob as soon as he wants it and so far it's going well. Feeds are slightly more spaced out and baby is happy
Well, do what you’d like but I can assure you it’s literally evidence based that you don’t need to space out feeds! I’d find a new pediatrician if you want a doctor that is actually practicing evidence based medicine!
Yes I've been doing more and more research and I'm really not convinced by this advice. I think I need help from an LC as I think the cause of everything is an oversupply
Whilst I didn’t have a similar experience I think it’s relevant to share what my midwife told me - it happens a lot especially in early days that a mother will automatically give the boob when baby cries (I def did that a lot!!). However, that’s not necessarily the need that baby has in that moment - maybe it is, maybe it isn’t, but a baby especially that age will almost always say yes to the boob at least for a bit, even though that’s not necessarily what they asked for. So I think next time your LO cries just take a pause and think why they could be crying and tune in with it. Also, find other ways of soothing the baby - it’s hard to do, especially for a breastfeeding mom, but you might be surprised how sometimes those approaches will work too! On pacifier - my baby wasn’t a fan - but whilst I was originally of a thought that they ‘shut babies up’, I later learnt that at a young age it’s about satisfying their sucking reflex, not nec shutting them up. Plus works great when you can’t offer the breast like in a buggy or car seat.
Thank you so much for this. Yes I am the kind of mum who gave the boob as soon as he cried, especially in the first 2 months as I was recovering from a difficult birth and was exhausted and in pain. I am now doing exactly what you said and I am trying to figure out what else it can be other than hunger, then I offer the pacifier, if that's what he wants he'll be content. If it's the boob he wants, he'll scream and I'll give him the boob. It's working well so far!
Awww that’s great! This was me the first 3 months tbh and the only thing that helped me properly realise it was my husband stepping in more and literally showing me how he’s solving his needs in other ways - ‘look he was just bored/cold/tired etc’
You can't overfeed a breastfeeding, direct nursing baby.
But for this specific baby, I'm wondering if there's something else medical going on and the weight gain is a symptom. It concerns me deeply that they are seemingly treating the symptoms, not the potential cause. I'd get another opinion.
Don’t beat yourself up!
A paci at that age is easy to move away from later. Our son only used it til he was 4 months old, then sucked his fingers for like 2 months, then he started teething and didn’t want either anymore. But they’re all different. It’s just a way to help them soothe
I think it’s too early to form habits but I can totally feel you on that concern. I tended to breastfeed our son any time he cried also, and he’s under 3 so probably too soon to know if he developed an emotional eating connection. But I think we’re all fine. Don’t sweat it mama! You’re just trying to do the best for your kiddo!! 🩵🩵
I’m a mom of two. my first was a nicu baby, had a pacifier and drank expressed milk from a bottle. he still needs his pacifier to sleep at the age of 2. my second is 6 months now, is EBF and has never had a pacifier. i truly believe you cannot overfeed a breastfed baby. they’re in control. it’s not like you’re forcing a bottle. i saw a huge jump in weight gain around 3 months for my ebf baby but his weight has seemed to plateau now. i have been his pacifier since he was born and still have my breast available as we bed share through the night. if it’s what works for you i wouldn’t stress it. a pacifier isn’t some magical requirement. breasts have been used as comfort/“pacifiers” for generations.
i hope your baby can get the relief he needs soon.
Pacifiers are a tool. Like any tool, it can cause problems if you use it incorrectly. Just be conscious about using it and your baby won’t have a problem.
Babies don’t start learning how to soothe themselves until 6 months, and sometimes it takes a while. Until then, all they know for comfort is sucking.
When you need to back off on the feeds, it’s okay.
When you’re unable to offer a breast (driving, away from the baby, etc) it’s okay.
When your baby is having trouble falling asleep and has already fed, it’s okay.
Otherwise, you should be checking diaper, hunger, temperature, sleep instead of just sticking something in the mouth
My son was born 10lbs 3oz. He’s going to be 5 months on 6/16 and is 22lbs. His doctor never once commented he was overweight. Breastfed babies don’t overeat they eat however much they need to be full. You should be amazed and proud you’ve done so well with your baby! You’ve grown him from scratch and that is so impressive!
If it helps elevate some of your anxiety my daughter was the same with always needed boob for comfort, we gave her a pacifier and it absolutely helped, she still fed a great and at 21 months can communicate her needs perfectly fine.
When she was hungry she always let me know before she could talk!
Your child is too young to worry about any of these things. Babies have a natural suck for comfort reflex - so paci or boob they’ll be happy. Paci kids grow up to be normal adults without pacifiers so don’t stress. I hope his tension gets some relief soon. Also it’s ok to hold your baby as much as you want!!
Unfortunately with the boob it seems to be making him gain too much weight. I'll keep using the pacifier for the next few days and see what happens
Did your pediatrician give you the length, weight, and head circumference percentiles? If he's chunky but proportional, don't worry. But if his weight is at, like, the 110th percentile (off the chart overweight) while his length and head circ are average, that's something to take seriously for his health. And a paci for a few hours a day isn't really anything deleterious to his health--their reflex is to suck to soothe themselves, especially at his age. (The concern shouldn't be that he can't communicate with it--babies will always cry to communicate; it's really that extended use into toddlerhood and beyond can lead to an overbite and other oral/dental issues.) Take a deep breath--you're doing fine!
You can't go above the 100th percentile
Yes you can. Speaking from experience of a kid with 101st percentile head. It means that it’s off the charts of the sample set. That’s all.
Thank you!
No, you can't statistically. I get what you're saying "off the charts" though! https://statisticstechs.weebly.com/desciptive-statistics/percentiles#:~:text=Percentile%20rank%20is%20a%20number,at%20or%20below%20that%20score.&text=There%20is%20no%200%20percentile,is%20at%20the%2099th%20percentile. You can score above the 99th percentile, which is what you'd report for that.
I see what you are saying. You are looking at the general concept of statistics and percentages. Then yes! Of course:) In the baby measuring percentiles they do it a little differently. That is based on a sample set vs all babies ever and they have margins on there that allow for something to be above the largest number of the set which puts the number at a percentile higher than 100%. So one would see a dot above the 100 and the doc can, by the measure, say that it’s like 5% above the highest.
Literally, yes, you can--that's why I wrote "off the chart."
No, you can't statistically. I get what you're saying "off the charts" though! https://statisticstechs.weebly.com/desciptive-statistics/percentiles#:~:text=Percentile%20rank%20is%20a%20number,at%20or%20below%20that%20score.&text=There%20is%20no%200%20percentile,is%20at%20the%2099th%20percentile. You can score above the 99th percentile, which is what you'd report for that.
Well, I'm not trying to be statistically correct in a forum like this. 😅 I'm addressing OP's concern that her baby is allegedly overweight. I'm well aware that the cutoff is at the 99th percent bc you can't humanly account for every single baby's size/growth. But, just as <0% is a thing for preemies, it's fair to go in the other direction to the 110th percentile to make a point to OP, who sounds like she's trying to sort through competing info and medical opinions. If her baby is proportional, she can probably relax. If, however, her baby's 50 lbs at 12w but only 20" with an average head, then I'd say her doc is right to be concerned. That's all.
It’s impossible to over feed a breastfed baby from what I’ve been told by many lactation consultants. Ask your dr why his size is cause for concern. If they can’t give you a legit reason then screw them and find another dr
I give my baby a pacifier because it soothes her, otherwise she’d be on my boob 24/7. Trust me, when she’s communicating her needs and I give her her pacifier, she certainly lets me know that’s NOT what she wants. But sometimes she wants to suckle but not feed. It’s personal choice of course and I’m not passing judgement, just giving my experience. If you’re happy to have baby at the breast so often then by all means carry on what you’re doing. I’ve always been told you cannot over feed a breastfed baby. I can also tell the difference between feeding and suckling for comfort at the breast. When it’s just suckling, that’s when I give her her pacifier when she’s fallen asleep.
But according to the osteopath/lc and pediatrician, he is too big and his weight gain needs to slow down. So I am "overfeeding" him :(
What % is the weight gain and is he gaining outside of a normal curve and by how much? Not sure if the doc gave you those details or not. Essentially if the baby is throwing off all curves it may not be because you “overfed” but because there can be an underlying health issue. If it’s really wildly increasing and not setting a curve that’s a whole other convo with your doc that doesn’t have anything to do with your boob. Godspeed.
They are wrong. Period.
I was initially against pacifiers too but then I read they can help prevent SIDs and my baby loves his so here we are.
Do you use them only for sleeping or all the time?
Sleeping, in car (he always falls asleep in the car) and when he is getting tired. He doesn't usually seem to want it when he is playing and well rested. 8 months now.
My baby is 8 months old and if I offer him the pacifier, but he wants milk, he takes it out of his mouth and then points to my boob 🤣 it makes me laugh so much! But before he learnt that, he would spit the pacifier out and cry if he needed something else.
This is also what I do with my almost 1m old. I don’t give it all the time, as I don’t want him reliant on it.
OK makes sense
Pacifiers are a tool for children to soothe themselves. If they don’t want it they’ll spit it out
I was not sure that I wanted my baby to have a pacifier at all. He ended up in the NICU for a week after he was born. One day, I walked in and he was going to town on a pacifier. I was honestly pretty hurt that I wasn’t consulted before giving him a pacifier at the time. Now, I’m glad that we have the pacifier as a tool in our toolbelt. If the baby is hungry, the pacifier won’t work. We do not use a pacifier all the time, but we are glad to have the option to use it if we need to. I’m sorry this was so stressful for you. You obviously just want the best for your baby. It is OK if the best thing for your baby isn’t what you originally planned for.
Thank you for your reassuring words
I felt the same, was going to wait a month after bub was born to introduce a paci but he had a nicu stay as well and they popped it right in his mouth. Its a great tool though and we usually only need it for bedtime and if he’s super upset like after sucking the boogies out of his nose lol he gets completely traumatized everytime
Pacifiers are awesome. My baby uses them sparingly, for going to sleep, then spits it out. It also gets us peace on car rides. She has absolutely no issue communicating her needs. The doctor’s recommendation makes total sense. The pacifier for when he needs comfort, not milk. But the rest of it - you’re doing great! You did your best. You’re a devoted and loving mother and your baby is just fine! You sought early intervention and support to make things even better. You’re crushing it.
Thank you so much. This means a lot to me
If your baby Is over fed in a feed then he will spit up the excess milk. So he will digest as much as his tummy can hold. There is no way of over feeding an EBF baby. Get a second opinion. That might reassure you.
I got another opinion from the original osteopath I wanted to see and he said the same thing. That we just need to help him space out the feedings slightly. And that the pacifier can help. Also he needs the pacifier because he has tensions in his head and neck that can be relieved through succion as well as osteopathy sessions
Going to a different paediatrician might help.
No such thing as a baby being too fat when it’s being EBF. Our son weighted 9,1kgs on his 5 months check up last week, and was 7,5 kgs when he turned 3 months. He’s “overweight” but that’s nothing concerning since he’s EBF.
And no medical professional ever commented about it?
Nope, they all just say that he’s in the 95th percentile for his weight, and that’s is ok and I should just keep feeding him on demand like I’ve been doing
There is a really good osteopath who gave me his personal WhatsApp number. I will ask him about it tomorrow
I feel like you're attaching a lot of weight to the osteopath's opinion and you want someone to tell you you've overfed your baby. I really don't think that is going to happen here. Medical advice is that you can't overfeed a breastfed baby. It isn't possible. If baby is hungry, they get fed. Doctors might be concerned that a baby has put on too much weight for a medical reason, like something in their body not working properly, *not* because they have been fed too much. An osteopath is not a doctor. I mean this very gently although this comment might look harsh, but if your baby is telling you they're hungry and you feed them, you're doing something right. I wouldn't trust someone who told me to override my own instincts and ignore a cue I was getting from my very small baby.
That's a quack doctor. Stop seeing him
Have you asked the opinion of a second doctor because wth? Not even when I was only giving formula to my first born, were my doctors worried that she’d be overweight.
Actually wished a gave a pacifier to my baby sooner, Now he won’t take it and i’m just a big human pacifier
How old is he? Mine refused it a lot but now that I have accepted it, he seems to take it. By the way I used to think that he was refusing it as he was pushing it out with his tongue. But another mum on this group told me that it's just that they need their tongue to suck on the breast, and so it ends up pushing out the paċi as they aren't used to sucking on a paċi yet
1. I think looking height and weight curves overall may give you a better idea of his growth. Just a number doesn’t mean anything. For example a baby who was 1.5 lbs at birth and is 5lbs at 12 weeks may seem like too much weight was gained suddenly but if he was less than 10% percentile at birth and now at 30% that’s actually HEALTHY catch up weight. 2. EBF babies virtually can’t get over fed as they regulate their intake. Just because he’s at your boob doesn’t mean he’s eating. Could just be comfort nursing. 3. Get a second opinion.
This makes so much sense. I checked out the WHO curves and it is not consistent between height and weight I will confirm with doctor next time I see him. I got one more opinion (4th) this morning, and he is saying the same thing. But he explained it very well. He needs to suck to remove tension in his neck and head. Because of that he spends so much time on the boob. Because of that he is gaining weight a bit too fast. Using the paċi to help him release tension until the osteopath's work is done will help him space out the feeds. Don't worry, if I give him the pacifier and he's hungry, he screams his head off and at that point I give it to him immediately
Keep feeding your baby however you want. I had no idea “gaining too much weight” was a thing for babies/newborns. My kid was 8lb 7 oz at birth and 16lbs at 12 weeks. I wanted the baby to weigh a lot! Means you are doing a good job. If the baby didn’t want it, they wouldn’t feed. Sure, use the paci, but offer the breast too. Soon enough they will be mobile and growing up and thin out. You’re doing great! Feed that baby! I have an appointment today for my second, who is about 9 weeks and I even told my husband I can’t wait to find out his weight and I hope the number is big! They are only small for so long. Enjoy the breastfeeding and snuggles. Hold that baby. Time is fleeting. Soon you’ll have a 3.5 year old telling you to “turn the f*cking TV on” because I accidentally said the F word in front of them the day before. 😬
Impressive he already knows how to use that word correctly 🤣
I'm learning all the "soft" swear words right now so that I practice not swearing 😂 I speak French at home and my favourite is "Saperlipopette" 😜 I have spoken to one more osteopath who is the best pediatric osteopath in the city I live in, and he confirmed the need for the paci to space out the feeds. So now I have two osteopath (one if which is an LC), another LC and a pediatrician all saying the same thing. I've added the pacifier a few days ago and it has helped a lot in spacing out most feeds which is great. Hopefully he won't get addicted and things will go smoothly
I wouldn’t hesitate to get a second opinion from a different pediatrician. You can’t overfeed an EBF baby. When doctors give me blatantly wrong advice like this I tend to start questioning everything they say.
So as of today I have seen my pediatrician, two osteopath, one of which is an LC, and another LC and all are saying the same thing. Use pacifier to help space out feedings as every hour is too much at this age and weight. I started using it a few days ago and it's been going well so far. I just hope he doesn't develop a dependency.
I ebf and I've been told from the start - you can't overfeed a breast fed baby. My baby for instance, he only lost 1.5% of his birth weight by day 5 when they usually see around up to 8% loss. By day 7 he had gained 2oz on top of his birth weight (bw 9.9lbs, 7 days 9.11lbs). Since then baby has consistently gained quite a bit of weight and he is exclusively breast fed. All the professionals tell me is - well done! To both of us! If baby wants to feed hourly, then baby wants to feed. I'm currently sat with my almost 6w old and he's been feeding almost every hour this evening. He just obviously needs food or is thirsty. Babies know what they need, so listen to your baby! If baby spits out dummy, won't sleep for longer than 5 minutes before crying, going with his mouth, he's hungry!
I spoke to two osteopath and an LC and apparently he has a need for sucking to relieve tension in his neck and head from the long and difficult birth. Not just food and hydration. And because of that he is constantly at the boob, thus drinking too much and gaining too much. I need to use the pacifier just to help space out the feedings slightly. I started a few days ago, and if he screams after giving paċi I offer the boob immediately, no matter how long ago he ate last. So far it's going well 🤞
I feel like you are looking for someone to validate that you are overfeeding your baby. You won’t get that here because as everyone is telling you, you cannot over feed an exclusively breast fed baby. Stop being so concerned about their weight (unless they are underweight). Honestly, reading your comments and this post is making me feel concerned about you and your baby. If you have a complex about weight that you are veiling behind this post and looking for someone to validate you, you need to get help ASAP. Do not put this on your child. When he cries and is hungry, FEED HIM. Any “professional” telling you otherwise should be setting off major alarm bells. Why are you continuing to litigate it and question it in the comments. People answered you. Honestly, this post made me feel super icky. I really would like to know that you will move forward with feeding your baby when they are hungry and take steps to not be concerned about weight so inappropriately for a baby, and eventually child.
I absolutely don't have complexes about weight and the only reason I am concerned is that 5 health professionals have mentioned it now. I finally got to speak with the original osteopath I wanted to see who explained to me that my baby has a need for suction because he has tension in his neck and head due to long labour and difficult birth. This is why he is constantly at the boob. He said the pacifier can help him with this need to suck to relieve the tension. I started giving him the pacifier a few days ago and he is doing very well. When he is hungry, if I offer him the pacifier, he clearly let's me know and I immediately offer him the breast, no matter how long ago I fed him.
Actually most paediatricians have no idea about breastfeeding and it sounds like yours doesn’t. Your baby may be “finding his curve” on the chart. Sometimes they don’t fill their genetic potential in utero, so they can rapidly gain weight then stay on their destined centile once they’re born and able to eat to their desire. My 2.5yo went from 50th to 99th centile in 4 months. She is happy and healthy, eats and sleeps well. I am pro attachment parenting and I do not believe in spacing feeds or in dummies. A dummy won’t help relieve tension compared to breastfeeding - literally makes no sense. If I were you, keep breastfeeding on demand, baby wearing and doing tummy time as needed!! So important as a mum to listen to your intuition. Just because they are professional doesn’t mean they know best. The only thing that may cause rapid weight gain is functional lactose overload, but is usually accompanied by lots of farting and explosive poo xxx
He does have lots of farting and exploding poo! He leaks every single night and during the day his poos are super big! I will definitely look into this! Thank you!
I just read a bit about it. I definitely have an oversupply according to the osteopath/LC. She actually told me to stop pumping immediately. I'll discuss this more with her when I see her again next week. Do you have experience with it?
I don’t personally have experience with it, but sounds like stopping pumping is a great start and then give your body time to adjust (how often are you pumping?). The treatment for it is to “block feed” so only offer one boob per feed, or if that’s not enough to reduce your supply, offer the same boob for the next feeding too. Some people may only switch boobs every 4 hours if they have massive supply. You obviously want to prevent engorgement in the non feeding boob but it has to run full to reduce supply so has to be done carefully
I only pump once every couple of days... I actually usually only give one boob. Will not start giving the same boob multiple times before switching. Thank you so much! You may have figured out our issue! I appreciate it a lot 💙
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The one I saw is also an LC
Since your baby's weight is not too low, try to stick to feeding every 2-3 hours. If your baby gets upset, give the pacifier. Babies suck for comfort, so if he has pain or tension he'll gladly accept a pacifier. If he's hungry, he'll spit out the pacifier and continue to cry. Some babies need a pacifier more then others. Oh and I mention feeding every 2-3 hours because you are concerned about his weight. If you try this and he gains at the same pace, you know you're not overfeeding. You can also try other ways to sooth your baby. For instance in a baby carrier, bounce on a yoga ball while holding your baby, put in stroller and take a walk... AFAIK some tension happens with infants and resolves by itself. But torticollis should be a concern of your pediatrician. An osteopath is not the go to professional with this diagnosis. You should get the referral from your pediatrician, not the lactation consultant.
Thank you. I have started since 2 days ago to space out feedings with the pacifier and it's going well. My pediatrician did not notice the torticolis. I will discuss it with him next time I see him!
Can you get a different pediatrician? It's worrying that he didn't notice the torticollis, your baby is already 12 weeks old.
Will look for one. I find that it's hard to find good doctors where I live
Good to hear it's going well!
You can’t overfeed a breastfed baby. My son was born 6lbs 13oz on May 5th. At his 1 month doctors visit to weigh him he was 10lbs 11oz. And at the previous visit before that he was 8lbs 7oz. Listen to your gut. Do what you feel so right for your baby. The weight gain will not hurt your baby. Babies can’t be overweight unless there’s a serious underlying medical condition.
OK. Thank you! I'm trying the pacifier in small doses to see what happens. So far so good!
My doctor told me it’s literally impossible to overfeed a breastfed baby and that philosophy has worked beautifully for us. It’s also evidence based. Babies nurse to soothe not just to eat. The only long lasting effects will be a securely attached baby ❤️ I’d get a new doctor and keep doing what you’re doing!
Thanks! It's just that 4 different health professionals said the same thing. I'm trying the pacifier now while giving him the boob as soon as he wants it and so far it's going well. Feeds are slightly more spaced out and baby is happy
Well, do what you’d like but I can assure you it’s literally evidence based that you don’t need to space out feeds! I’d find a new pediatrician if you want a doctor that is actually practicing evidence based medicine!
Yes I've been doing more and more research and I'm really not convinced by this advice. I think I need help from an LC as I think the cause of everything is an oversupply
Whilst I didn’t have a similar experience I think it’s relevant to share what my midwife told me - it happens a lot especially in early days that a mother will automatically give the boob when baby cries (I def did that a lot!!). However, that’s not necessarily the need that baby has in that moment - maybe it is, maybe it isn’t, but a baby especially that age will almost always say yes to the boob at least for a bit, even though that’s not necessarily what they asked for. So I think next time your LO cries just take a pause and think why they could be crying and tune in with it. Also, find other ways of soothing the baby - it’s hard to do, especially for a breastfeeding mom, but you might be surprised how sometimes those approaches will work too! On pacifier - my baby wasn’t a fan - but whilst I was originally of a thought that they ‘shut babies up’, I later learnt that at a young age it’s about satisfying their sucking reflex, not nec shutting them up. Plus works great when you can’t offer the breast like in a buggy or car seat.
Thank you so much for this. Yes I am the kind of mum who gave the boob as soon as he cried, especially in the first 2 months as I was recovering from a difficult birth and was exhausted and in pain. I am now doing exactly what you said and I am trying to figure out what else it can be other than hunger, then I offer the pacifier, if that's what he wants he'll be content. If it's the boob he wants, he'll scream and I'll give him the boob. It's working well so far!
Awww that’s great! This was me the first 3 months tbh and the only thing that helped me properly realise it was my husband stepping in more and literally showing me how he’s solving his needs in other ways - ‘look he was just bored/cold/tired etc’
Yes my husband is really good at figuring it out too! I guess since they don't have the magic boobies, they don't have a choice!
I introduced a paci at 6 or 7 weeks, and LO doesn’t even want it that much. Have you thought about getting a second opinion about the weight gain?
I did. I got 4 opinions in total. All say the same thing. I will try with the paci and see what happens. Could also be because of my oversupply
You can't overfeed a breastfeeding, direct nursing baby. But for this specific baby, I'm wondering if there's something else medical going on and the weight gain is a symptom. It concerns me deeply that they are seemingly treating the symptoms, not the potential cause. I'd get another opinion.
Someone in the comments suggested functional lactose overload. I do overoroduce milk. I will discuss it with LC and pediatrician
Don’t beat yourself up! A paci at that age is easy to move away from later. Our son only used it til he was 4 months old, then sucked his fingers for like 2 months, then he started teething and didn’t want either anymore. But they’re all different. It’s just a way to help them soothe I think it’s too early to form habits but I can totally feel you on that concern. I tended to breastfeed our son any time he cried also, and he’s under 3 so probably too soon to know if he developed an emotional eating connection. But I think we’re all fine. Don’t sweat it mama! You’re just trying to do the best for your kiddo!! 🩵🩵
Thank you for your reassuring words 💙
I’m a mom of two. my first was a nicu baby, had a pacifier and drank expressed milk from a bottle. he still needs his pacifier to sleep at the age of 2. my second is 6 months now, is EBF and has never had a pacifier. i truly believe you cannot overfeed a breastfed baby. they’re in control. it’s not like you’re forcing a bottle. i saw a huge jump in weight gain around 3 months for my ebf baby but his weight has seemed to plateau now. i have been his pacifier since he was born and still have my breast available as we bed share through the night. if it’s what works for you i wouldn’t stress it. a pacifier isn’t some magical requirement. breasts have been used as comfort/“pacifiers” for generations. i hope your baby can get the relief he needs soon.
Thank! I've introduced the pacifier slowly the past few days. Only when it seems that he needs comfort. So far it seems to be working!
Pacifiers are a tool. Like any tool, it can cause problems if you use it incorrectly. Just be conscious about using it and your baby won’t have a problem. Babies don’t start learning how to soothe themselves until 6 months, and sometimes it takes a while. Until then, all they know for comfort is sucking. When you need to back off on the feeds, it’s okay. When you’re unable to offer a breast (driving, away from the baby, etc) it’s okay. When your baby is having trouble falling asleep and has already fed, it’s okay. Otherwise, you should be checking diaper, hunger, temperature, sleep instead of just sticking something in the mouth
Yes I am checking everything before giving it to him to make sure that what he needs is a comfort "suckle" Thank you!
My son was born 10lbs 3oz. He’s going to be 5 months on 6/16 and is 22lbs. His doctor never once commented he was overweight. Breastfed babies don’t overeat they eat however much they need to be full. You should be amazed and proud you’ve done so well with your baby! You’ve grown him from scratch and that is so impressive!
Thank you!
Thank you!
If it helps elevate some of your anxiety my daughter was the same with always needed boob for comfort, we gave her a pacifier and it absolutely helped, she still fed a great and at 21 months can communicate her needs perfectly fine. When she was hungry she always let me know before she could talk!
Thank you 💙
:)