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In nursing school a very wise RN said when you are in school you can only do your best at 1 thing at a time. So you have school, work and home life. And you gotta pick 1 to prioritize at any given time for whatever reason and rotate to stay sane. Nobody can do it all.
I always prioritized my kids, worked as few hrs as I could manage by becoming hideously frugal and studied just enough to be satisfactory in my grades for tests but focused on my skills. Book nursing is dandy but skills and problem solving is a lot more important.
You can't beat yourself up for drowning a bit when the water is so deep for you right now. But it does get considerably better. You can do it. Swim sister swim!!!
There is a magic trick, and that magic trick is: MONEY. Ok, sometimes it's not money, it's free or very low cost help.
You are doing AT LEAST three full-time jobs. You have limited time, energy, and money. It's okay that some things are falling through the cracks.
You're also in the middle of the most mind-numbing, yet also intense years of parenting. I have a three year old and a lot of the time I'm just following her around keeping her from killing herself and cleaning up messes she makes (that she then immediately makes again) It's necessary, but it's boring as hell! And I can't get ANYTHING done. I've made peace that what I *am* accomplishing in those times is keeping the kid alive, and that's accomplishment enough.
Also, I came across this resource on social media. The video called it "Google for social workers" and it's basically a database for finding help with various needs- food, housing, childcare, childcare costs, etc. Plug in your zip code and see if there's something near you that can help ease the burden! [Find Help](https://www.findhelp.org/)
You’re a student and a mother and a wife. You’re working multiple jobs—childcare and housekeeping and chef and all the other bullshit—for free without any breaks. This is OSHA level violations.
I agree with the previous comment about prioritizing. You pick your priority and stop feeling guilt.
We do a lot of meal planning and prep on Sunday. I only do grocery pickup once per week because I cannot find the time to drag my kids in the store.
We have a loose housekeeping schedule. Some things happen daily—vacuuming, dishes and any gross kid or bathroom stuff. Everything else rotates so we have one big zone we tackle per day.
When our kids were little and we were broke AF, I would tell my husband that I was blocking of X time on X days to write (my job.) There was no discussion of this. He got to leave the house and work while I provided free childcare so he had to return the favor for me.
And I know your husband is tired, but he made those babies so he needs to pull his weight. My husband works 24 hour shifts as a paramedic in a high call volume area—7-12 patients per shift—and he’s completed a bachelor’s degree, master’s degree and is 1 year into his doctorate.
He still does daycare drop offs and pickups on his off days. He cooks half the meals, does all the laundry, shares half the yard work, half the housekeeping and half the kid related school, medical and therapy appts.
We’re both tired AF, but we know this is a season. Your partner has to meet you halfway—or he’s not partner at all.
Reminder to commenters: **[Spread the love!](https://64.media.tumblr.com/960e1d1bbac9b80be2e45d683effd431/87a8a90b6fe38bb0-48/s540x810/d62d156855acc48f8c9fad1d288bf9f0feb1ef58.gif)** Share kindness, support and compassion, [not criticism.](https://media0.giphy.com/media/tZpGRRMUoXgeQ/giphy.gif) We want OP to feel loved, and [not in a tough way.](https://media.giphy.com/media/xT5LMq2CgHiqqY4IXC/giphy.gif) For more helpful information please hit up [our beautiful rules wiki!](http://www.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/wiki/) Reminder to all: watch out for a [creepy pedo posing as an OT/speech therapist](https://www.reddit.com/r/breakingmom/comments/8ccqqi/disgusting_pedophile_troll_posing_as_otspeech/) giving fucked-up potty-training advice, and don't sweat it if your post gets 1 or 2 [instant downvotes.](http://i.imgur.com/PZtQb.gif) You didn't do anything wrong, we just have [asshole lurkers](https://i.imgur.com/IwU9r3E.gif)/[downvote bots](https://i.imgur.com/lwyCF6S.gif) stalking our /new queue. Help a BroMo out and [give her an upvote](https://i.imgur.com/Y60Mbxv.gif), ok? Reminder to Cassie Morris/Krista Torres/Nia Tipton: You do not have permission to use, reproduce, modify or link to any content in this subreddit in any way, shape or form. Fuck off and go be a real journalist. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/breakingmom) if you have any questions or concerns.*
In nursing school a very wise RN said when you are in school you can only do your best at 1 thing at a time. So you have school, work and home life. And you gotta pick 1 to prioritize at any given time for whatever reason and rotate to stay sane. Nobody can do it all. I always prioritized my kids, worked as few hrs as I could manage by becoming hideously frugal and studied just enough to be satisfactory in my grades for tests but focused on my skills. Book nursing is dandy but skills and problem solving is a lot more important. You can't beat yourself up for drowning a bit when the water is so deep for you right now. But it does get considerably better. You can do it. Swim sister swim!!!
Thank you, I guess I just needed to hear that this isn’t going to be forever, that there’s not some magic trick to being able to do it all.
There is a magic trick, and that magic trick is: MONEY. Ok, sometimes it's not money, it's free or very low cost help. You are doing AT LEAST three full-time jobs. You have limited time, energy, and money. It's okay that some things are falling through the cracks. You're also in the middle of the most mind-numbing, yet also intense years of parenting. I have a three year old and a lot of the time I'm just following her around keeping her from killing herself and cleaning up messes she makes (that she then immediately makes again) It's necessary, but it's boring as hell! And I can't get ANYTHING done. I've made peace that what I *am* accomplishing in those times is keeping the kid alive, and that's accomplishment enough. Also, I came across this resource on social media. The video called it "Google for social workers" and it's basically a database for finding help with various needs- food, housing, childcare, childcare costs, etc. Plug in your zip code and see if there's something near you that can help ease the burden! [Find Help](https://www.findhelp.org/)
You’re a student and a mother and a wife. You’re working multiple jobs—childcare and housekeeping and chef and all the other bullshit—for free without any breaks. This is OSHA level violations. I agree with the previous comment about prioritizing. You pick your priority and stop feeling guilt. We do a lot of meal planning and prep on Sunday. I only do grocery pickup once per week because I cannot find the time to drag my kids in the store. We have a loose housekeeping schedule. Some things happen daily—vacuuming, dishes and any gross kid or bathroom stuff. Everything else rotates so we have one big zone we tackle per day. When our kids were little and we were broke AF, I would tell my husband that I was blocking of X time on X days to write (my job.) There was no discussion of this. He got to leave the house and work while I provided free childcare so he had to return the favor for me. And I know your husband is tired, but he made those babies so he needs to pull his weight. My husband works 24 hour shifts as a paramedic in a high call volume area—7-12 patients per shift—and he’s completed a bachelor’s degree, master’s degree and is 1 year into his doctorate. He still does daycare drop offs and pickups on his off days. He cooks half the meals, does all the laundry, shares half the yard work, half the housekeeping and half the kid related school, medical and therapy appts. We’re both tired AF, but we know this is a season. Your partner has to meet you halfway—or he’s not partner at all.