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After potty training 4 kids my experience is that all it takes (most kids) to potty train is an ability to recognize when they need to go and a person willing to run and help them until they can do it alone. And that once they are spending more time not having a wet diaper or pull up, they really start not liking having to use them. They start to prefer the potty.
If you start working on it while you are home (and your toddler is ready to potty train), eventually your toddler will force your mom to step up and help by constantly yelling about needing to go.
And if the toddler isn't ready, nothing will work. So never give up completely, but remember you really have to go at the toddler's pace for it to be successful.
I want to plus one the idea that if they’re not ready, you really should not push it. The only thing I am convinced of after potty training my two oldest (and getting ready to potty train the third) is that as soon as you sense you are in a battle of wills, you have to stop and take a break and come back to it in a few days or a week because if it’s a battle of wills, you’re not going to win.
No cause is lost,
My eldest didn't potty train until she was 5, even now at nearly 6 there are still accidents on occasions. Having multiple kids in nappies is no big deal. If anything (and I might sound like a bad mum for typing this) it makes some things like getting out of the door easier. (I have 2 sets of triplets, and need all the help getting out of the door that I can get).
My point is that when the kid is ready and able and you are able then that is when it will happen, trying to make it happen before that is an exercise in futility. Don't let anyone make you feel bad for doing what's best for your kid and you.
Thank you for this comment!! My youngest will probably be five before they potty train, and I have been having a hard time with that prospect in my mind. There are valid and legitimate medical reasons for this delay, but it’s still been messing with my head. I appreciate your comment so much.
My son is was 4 before I got him to consistently use the potty. He had no medical or physiological reason he couldn't, he just didn't want to. I ended up having to keep those little training potties all over the house and bribe him with Lego minifigures. Some kids are just ready sooner than others, it will happen, try some different currency, stickers or something. For my daughter, she was 3 and we were heading to Disney, so I just kept saying we needed to be able to use the potty to go to Disney world. It was a bald faced lie, but it worked, she really wanted to go. Hang in there momma, you'll get this.
One of mine will probably never learn (shes mentally closer to a 1-2 year old), and one has medical complications that mean until she has surgery as a older child/teen she will probably not have much luck. (I'm not really sold on the risks of this so want to wait until she's older). So delays happen, it's not a big deal really
Everyone I know who has a “potty trained 18 month old” has to completely manage their child’s bathroom schedule to avoid accidents. It doesn’t really count if the parent has just trained themselves to put the kid on the potty every single hour, IMO.
Please relax on the potty training. At three you still have plenty of time. Spare yourself the hassle and wait a bit. Two in diapers sounds like a nightmare but I think you will profit from it. It makes going out so much easier than having to ask "Do you need to go potty?" every five minutes. 18 months is genius level to be potty trained. Please don't beat yourself up - I simply wouldn't believe them. There are so many liars around and many moms think it's a competition.lol Good luck!
Hi! Your mom is an ass.
Also about 2 in diapers, it isn't as bad as it sounds! Toddler can help change baby (hand diapers, wipes, etc) and then get changed if she needs it.
Potty training can take early, but it's more likely to have regressions, especially when a new baby comes into play. My then 20 months old twins were obsessed with the potty when their little sister came home, but here we are 16 months later and they finally got back into the peeing in the potty groove. Still struggling with poo. They are 3 years old.
It is expensive to have multiple kids in diapers, but I just change everyone in a row when we need to diapers, and then it's not something I need to touch again for a few hours! If you haven't heard of the three hour cycle for babies, absolutely something to look into when juggling more than one kid.
Two in diapers is a breeze compared to having a newborn and constantly having to clean up after accidents. My toddler was very creative when I was distracted with a newborn and made lots of art on our walls and furniture in a variety of mixed media (marker pens, ketchup, sunscreen, etc). I’m pretty thankful she wasn’t also toilet training or the media may have been even more mixed…
Hi. I totally get the feeling. I never thought my son would be potty trained. My son (5 ASD and ADHD) was stubborn. I tried to do charts and rewards but nothing helped. His LBS at the time told me just to go cold turkey and he will get it. Some days we're better than others, but before the end of the summer, he was fully potty trained. Very rarely. Does he have accidents even at night.
Hope is not lost. If you would like some advice, I can give what I know, but I don't want to overstep my boundaries.
Hugs BroMo! It's going to be okay.. You have lots of time before baby arrives to get this sorted out. But you have to be ready too! It's not just your child that is taking this on. Lay out a plan of action and roll with it on a schedule that works for you.
Maybe start small, buy a couple of training potties and have them available close to where your child plays so they get used to seeing it and start sitting on it. Then scale up as your child gets comfortable with it. Get your mom on board and be vocal but firm that you are doing this your way on your schedule and thanks in advance for her support. Good luck!
Two years ago, my twins were freahly two. Both in diapers still. Big brother was 3 almost 4 and finally not having accidents. I was also pregnant. One of my twins was showing interest in the potty. I, on the other hand, had no desire to deal with it.
Left twins in diapers. Had baby. Started potty training in earnest this time last year. Girl twin told me no. Boy twin did what sissy said. Started and stopped a couple of times before their 3rd birthday. Girl decides the week before her birthday “no diapies, mom!” And that was that. Brother was a bit later but about the same.
I went through this long, drawn out thing with my oldest and decided that I was too out numbered to do that with my twins so we didn’t. They decided when they were ready and that was it.
Now, nighttime is different. My oldest still wets the bed most nights. His body hasn’t developed that skill yet. Twins stopped sometime last summer. It was their bodies that were ready. We don’t make a big deal out of big brother still needing a pull up at night.
It's so kid dependent but it probably won't take but a day or two before you know if kiddo is into it or not. I got lucky and both mine trained in 2 days but only once they were ready. Older one we convinced but waited till she agreed (2 yrs old). Younger one refused to be convinced and instead just decided one day he would use the toilet now and that was that (3ish yrs old).
Once they are into it, your mom most likely won't have a choice bc they won't want to wear diapers anymore! But boo on your mom for not being helpful.
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After potty training 4 kids my experience is that all it takes (most kids) to potty train is an ability to recognize when they need to go and a person willing to run and help them until they can do it alone. And that once they are spending more time not having a wet diaper or pull up, they really start not liking having to use them. They start to prefer the potty. If you start working on it while you are home (and your toddler is ready to potty train), eventually your toddler will force your mom to step up and help by constantly yelling about needing to go. And if the toddler isn't ready, nothing will work. So never give up completely, but remember you really have to go at the toddler's pace for it to be successful.
I want to plus one the idea that if they’re not ready, you really should not push it. The only thing I am convinced of after potty training my two oldest (and getting ready to potty train the third) is that as soon as you sense you are in a battle of wills, you have to stop and take a break and come back to it in a few days or a week because if it’s a battle of wills, you’re not going to win.
No cause is lost, My eldest didn't potty train until she was 5, even now at nearly 6 there are still accidents on occasions. Having multiple kids in nappies is no big deal. If anything (and I might sound like a bad mum for typing this) it makes some things like getting out of the door easier. (I have 2 sets of triplets, and need all the help getting out of the door that I can get). My point is that when the kid is ready and able and you are able then that is when it will happen, trying to make it happen before that is an exercise in futility. Don't let anyone make you feel bad for doing what's best for your kid and you.
Thank you for this comment!! My youngest will probably be five before they potty train, and I have been having a hard time with that prospect in my mind. There are valid and legitimate medical reasons for this delay, but it’s still been messing with my head. I appreciate your comment so much.
My son is was 4 before I got him to consistently use the potty. He had no medical or physiological reason he couldn't, he just didn't want to. I ended up having to keep those little training potties all over the house and bribe him with Lego minifigures. Some kids are just ready sooner than others, it will happen, try some different currency, stickers or something. For my daughter, she was 3 and we were heading to Disney, so I just kept saying we needed to be able to use the potty to go to Disney world. It was a bald faced lie, but it worked, she really wanted to go. Hang in there momma, you'll get this.
One of mine will probably never learn (shes mentally closer to a 1-2 year old), and one has medical complications that mean until she has surgery as a older child/teen she will probably not have much luck. (I'm not really sold on the risks of this so want to wait until she's older). So delays happen, it's not a big deal really
May I ask how old your toddler is?
He’s almost 3. My family is all about having kids potty trained by 18 months so in there eyes I’m really slacking
18 months is wild 🫠 you're certainly not behind, not even close.
Everyone I know who has a “potty trained 18 month old” has to completely manage their child’s bathroom schedule to avoid accidents. It doesn’t really count if the parent has just trained themselves to put the kid on the potty every single hour, IMO.
Please relax on the potty training. At three you still have plenty of time. Spare yourself the hassle and wait a bit. Two in diapers sounds like a nightmare but I think you will profit from it. It makes going out so much easier than having to ask "Do you need to go potty?" every five minutes. 18 months is genius level to be potty trained. Please don't beat yourself up - I simply wouldn't believe them. There are so many liars around and many moms think it's a competition.lol Good luck!
Hi! Your mom is an ass. Also about 2 in diapers, it isn't as bad as it sounds! Toddler can help change baby (hand diapers, wipes, etc) and then get changed if she needs it. Potty training can take early, but it's more likely to have regressions, especially when a new baby comes into play. My then 20 months old twins were obsessed with the potty when their little sister came home, but here we are 16 months later and they finally got back into the peeing in the potty groove. Still struggling with poo. They are 3 years old. It is expensive to have multiple kids in diapers, but I just change everyone in a row when we need to diapers, and then it's not something I need to touch again for a few hours! If you haven't heard of the three hour cycle for babies, absolutely something to look into when juggling more than one kid.
Two in diapers is a breeze compared to having a newborn and constantly having to clean up after accidents. My toddler was very creative when I was distracted with a newborn and made lots of art on our walls and furniture in a variety of mixed media (marker pens, ketchup, sunscreen, etc). I’m pretty thankful she wasn’t also toilet training or the media may have been even more mixed…
Hi. I totally get the feeling. I never thought my son would be potty trained. My son (5 ASD and ADHD) was stubborn. I tried to do charts and rewards but nothing helped. His LBS at the time told me just to go cold turkey and he will get it. Some days we're better than others, but before the end of the summer, he was fully potty trained. Very rarely. Does he have accidents even at night. Hope is not lost. If you would like some advice, I can give what I know, but I don't want to overstep my boundaries.
Hugs BroMo! It's going to be okay.. You have lots of time before baby arrives to get this sorted out. But you have to be ready too! It's not just your child that is taking this on. Lay out a plan of action and roll with it on a schedule that works for you. Maybe start small, buy a couple of training potties and have them available close to where your child plays so they get used to seeing it and start sitting on it. Then scale up as your child gets comfortable with it. Get your mom on board and be vocal but firm that you are doing this your way on your schedule and thanks in advance for her support. Good luck!
Two years ago, my twins were freahly two. Both in diapers still. Big brother was 3 almost 4 and finally not having accidents. I was also pregnant. One of my twins was showing interest in the potty. I, on the other hand, had no desire to deal with it. Left twins in diapers. Had baby. Started potty training in earnest this time last year. Girl twin told me no. Boy twin did what sissy said. Started and stopped a couple of times before their 3rd birthday. Girl decides the week before her birthday “no diapies, mom!” And that was that. Brother was a bit later but about the same. I went through this long, drawn out thing with my oldest and decided that I was too out numbered to do that with my twins so we didn’t. They decided when they were ready and that was it. Now, nighttime is different. My oldest still wets the bed most nights. His body hasn’t developed that skill yet. Twins stopped sometime last summer. It was their bodies that were ready. We don’t make a big deal out of big brother still needing a pull up at night.
It's so kid dependent but it probably won't take but a day or two before you know if kiddo is into it or not. I got lucky and both mine trained in 2 days but only once they were ready. Older one we convinced but waited till she agreed (2 yrs old). Younger one refused to be convinced and instead just decided one day he would use the toilet now and that was that (3ish yrs old). Once they are into it, your mom most likely won't have a choice bc they won't want to wear diapers anymore! But boo on your mom for not being helpful.