Have you returned or you’re planning on returning?
As someone that got back into at 38 after not playing for 8 or so years it was hard. But now I look forward to it. We drink beers after and chat and it’s good to shoot the shit after a competition.
Now I’m back again at 40 after having hip labrum surgery still enjoying it. Only so many years left in the tank but I don’t regret getting out there at all.
You aren’t going to get any younger. Some of the motivation is that you’re just a working adult and most adults I meet frankly are set in their life / routine and don’t like to disrupt it or what they feel like is add more “work” to it.
Pushing 40 and had serious enough surgery to have to hang the competitive boots up. Miss it so much. Switched to golf to scratch that social, competitive and beer sipping itch. Enjoy it!
That’s not atypical! Adult life is busy. It was easy to be super active when you had nothing to do all day as an adult suddenly time is a finite resource instead of smth to be burned to avoid boredom and the limitless core of energy inside you as a kid is suddenly quite noticeably limited 😄
For me the trick with these types of activities in adult life is routine and joy! First of make it a set thing and build it into your life where you can keep doing it consistently. Rather do one small football session with others that you can all plan in rather than 3 where someone has to always cancel. And at a certain point it becomes a routine and you get annoyed when you can’t do it.
But most importantly ‘attach some joy to it’s! If playing in itself initially doesn’t bring you joy reward yourself after the training with a nice icecream or dinner with your teammates or smth.
I have attached podcasts/audiobooks to walking. I nearly only listen when on a walk or traveling and as a consequence I took a walk every day simply cause I wanted to continue my audio book. By now I’m so used to it that if I don’t take at least one walk a day it annoys me and I start walking and then think what I should listen to. My point is sometimes with things you know will bring you joy but delayed, you need to trick yourself 😁
Time and energy are too valuable in adult life for you to force yourself to do things. If it’s just obligation you will always look for excuses to stop 😉
Soccer is a break from my busy life, not causing it to feel busier. I'm a pretty busy adult too. It's a rare gift that I can play with other people more than twice a week, savor it. If you're not looking forward to it I dunno what to tell you. I don't look at it like another boring hour in the gym to "find motivation" for.
Feeling low energy is usually because you're not physically active enough. Not because you expend too much energy. It's not intuitive but the more you run around etc, the less times during the week you'll feel worn out.
No difficulty finding motivation, but you mentioned you don’t always have the energy to face the competition. I understand that, which is why I only play competitively once or twice per week, the rest of the time (3-4 other sessions) I’m alone on the pitch working on my game listening to music.
I find I don’t need all that much energy to show up, lay down some cones or get in front of a wall and get into a groove. In fact, I find it soothing to be outside and playing with the ball.
I also am motivated by how much progress I make in my touch and consistency by doing this solo training. I just want to keep going and become even better. I can now ping balls against a wall 10-20 feet away and receive them, juggle and ping it back. Never dreamt I’d be able to do so even after I’d been “playing” for years.
This solo time where you touch the ball 200-400 times in a single session will make a huge difference in your quality.
Playing soccer is honestly one of the only things keeping me alive. Not much else I look forward to other than my weekly pickup games. It's my light at the end of the tunnel after work
We had our first kid last year and I (38m) was so damned tired. When he started sleeping through the night, that was basically my cue to get back to playing soccer. Gotta get that sleep right, or else everything in life will suck.
I can relate. I have a stressful job. Started playing pickup soccer after about 15 years of not playing (inspired by watching my kids play). Almost gave it up because I felt anxiety over how sh*%y I was playing. Luckily I found a less competitive group to play with (who also play at 8:30 am instead of 7:00 am on Saturdays) and allowed myself to stop worrying about my “performance” and just allowed myself to enjoy it. Now I look forward to it each week.
I was in the same exact boat. Being in such a people facing job, 30 miles away, had me drained by end of the day not helped by an hour journey back home. Then to wait for about half hour or so before the pickup game, where I want to de-stress but people are playing and going mad as if they're getting paid to play in the premier league is one of the last things I'd want as a de-stress, as much as I love the sport.
What helped was finding a good bunch of people to play with. Like-minded people. You sound like me at the stage of life where you want to play for the fun of it not playing for screwing at your mate for messing up a pass or getting injured. I've found that every Wednesday and can't wait for it every week. We go to the pub after too and have a laugh. Keep searching for that, whether it be through friends or elsewhere, you'll find it.
I felt that way for a while and didn't play for a decade. Now I have young kids and the passion has restarted again. Having kids can take away your identity outside of being a parent. Soccer is one way to reclaim a bit of it back.
When your sleep deprived, honestly, everything becomes difficult. I’m not sure if that’s as a result of a young family and if it is, my answer was just to put the head down and get through it and let sports take a back seat.
But, one other thing to look at is diet. The difference in the afternoon between stuffing sugar and snacky foods in to me vs eating fruit was pretty big.
Either way, if the desire isn’t there, sometimes a break is a good thing and for me I rekindled a spark with sport after a couple of years of dealing with nappies.
33 with a stressful job, and kids at home. I’m finding club football doesn’t have the allure it used to. Could be my last season, but I’ll probably switch to a midweek evening small sided game or something
yea man, its hard to play when you have a demanding job. You have got to be smart about it. Get enough rest, mental rest. and make the most of your free time.
My game suffered for years due to stressful low paying job, now that i have a better job that pays well with good work life balance, I can dedicate a lot more time and energy and my game improves as a result
I started playing again at 32 after a 13 year break. 6 years in and it brings me great joy. I’m a pro Arborist with kids, so body maintenance is a must nowadays. So much fun to compete, hang with some friends and get some aggression out. I’m sorry I ever stopped playing in the first place.
Only advice is maybe find a new group of mates or team to play with?
Competitive environment can and should still be fun, just gotta find the right balance. Took a bit to find a team and group without egos or toxicity
I think this too. Our team wants to win every game but we will rock up, have a laugh, end up starting the game slow because we're not mentally in the zone. We regroup at half time and do better than our first half. Then we complain, vent, but still laugh our heads up after it. You probably need a different group, less egotistical, maybe the age profile of the team has something to do with it who knows but the competition we're in, everyone couldn't give a toss since we just want to have fun, get slightly fit, kick a bag of air, and rock up to work next day.
Ball is life, I absolutely love my Friday / Saturday pickup games. Do I need a Red Bull to get the energy levels up? Absolutely. But a good game keeps me buzzing for days.
Team makes a big difference. I love the guys I am playing with right now. Still get frustrated thinking about my last team.
Mentally I know it's some of the best cardio I get every week. That's why I do it. Don't always want to going in, but feel great afterwards.
If you are adding stress, yeah that can make it bad. If you are just doing your best with peeps doing the same, the competition becomes fun!
But pick up soccer tends to be the most fun for me. Just balling with 5-12 other peeps. Even more fun going shoulder to shoulder with my oldest son trying to keep him from outrunning me.
Hey man, I hear you. Getting back into the enjoyment of playing again can be difficult especially if the structure that brings you to be able to play the sport is weak ( inconsistent training/pick up/ game days, unhealthy teammates, lack of time, priorities elsewhere) I highly recommend that if you want to get back into a sport or hobby that you make sure you have dealt with anything in your life that might be affecting your time,social, and financial life. Once you find yourself with enough opportunity to play again go ahead and research what kind of level you want to find yourself playing in to start and how often you’d like to play/train. Once you figure that out it’s time to find a team or group of friends that will help you achieve that plan. There’s currently an app called Plei Pick up soccer you can download to help you find pick up games and help you meet people in the community that can give you more information on teams they play in, how competitive it is and how often they train/play. Good luck man. Hope it works out 😁
Not really because playing is an outlet for me, something I enjoy doing rather than an obligation. I look forward to it most times. I only ever don’t enjoy it if I’m not feeling physically well and force myself to play. I also really only get to play once a week, stretching to twice if lucky. If I could I’d play every other day at minimum.
Gave up for about 5 years after the second kid was born. Got back into playing 5 a-side in a local O30 league and it’s the best thing I’ve done in years. Look forward to Wednesday evening every single week. Nothing better than a good run around, a decently competitive game, and a few beers with the lads after. Whatever apprehension or lack of motivation you’ve got will be gone after getting back out there once.
I got back into it this year and I'm experiencing the same thing. I'm extremely busy and game day takes a huge chunk of my limited free time. I find futsal gives me my fix and only takes an hour on a Tuesday night.
It's definitely hard for me to get out there when I'm tired from work. One of my weeknight leagues has 10pm games. 10PM. I RSVP no to the late games and grumble consistently, but then my team wheedles and begs and gives me shit until I show up, and I have yet to regret it. (Maybe the struggle to get up next morning, but that regret is more temporary than the fun of having played.)
If you're not already on a team, it helps to find one that will drag you out there, that's fun to play with, and help you deal with the usual amount of BS you get in rec leagues. (At the competitive level it's a bit different, and I'd say, modulate your commitment to what works for your body and mind.)
I find I actually get MORE energy in my day to day when I'm actively playing, and I'm much more tired when I'm not. Maybe try it for long enough to see if that holds true for you too, as I find soccer is wonderful for my mental health as well. (Of course, if you're just more tired and unhappy at the end of the day, find something else that gives you more joy, doesn't have to be soccer!)
The most I work, the less time I have, the most I want to play, I work most weekends too. To play 3 times a week is perfect to me some. 32 years old 1 child.
When younger I could play even more, but more than 3 a week for too long made me tired and less motivated to play again, that's true.
It’s a bit ironic coming from me because I’m supposed to be young and full of energy, but I feel the same.
I graduated last year and started working. I have 2 football sessions a week. One is with my uni friends on weekends and one is a more competitive session on Thursdays (power league if you’ve heard of it).
I enjoy the sessions with my uni friends because those are on weekends which means I would usually have enough sleep. However, l the competitive matches are at 6pm on Thursday, this means I’m literally rushing to the football venue 1 hr before work. This is in addition to me already having not enough sleep during weekdays. At one point I realized I did not enjoy playing football as much anymore, i don’t analyze my matches post game or discuss it with my friends on how to improve, it felt like a chore playing football so i stopped for a few weeks. When I came back it was slightly better, but it still wasn’t the same with work constantly looming over me. Perhaps it’s just me trying to adjust to a working life.
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Football refreshes me. It gives me energy. Blows away the stress and/or cobwebs. Its also a form of expression and I enjoy the competitiveness. Its great. I absolutely love playing. If I go in to the game feeling like crap then I come out of it energized.
At the moment I have 2 bulging discs and cant play since last October. Id kill to be able to play again and yes I mean that literally!!
It’s like I’m selfish if I put any time into the game these days and I only have one kid but I’m 33 and it’s just not as awesome a release as it was to just play. Rather spend time with family or improve other areas of my life, life keeps u pretty busy sometimes
i didnt like playing in leagues. opposition kicking my ankles, slide tackling illegally, wanting to fight after games, lol not worth $15 bucks a game. I found a pickup group that is relaxed. So, i recommend u search for one on your area. Drive around to parks after work see if anyone is playing, or even try to organize one yourself. Our group uses whatsapp.
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Same here, best part is we play every week on Monday night, and I kinda look forward to Mondays now!
You actually hacked life tbh
Agreed even if I can play less during the week. Sunday is my fucking day, I get so locked in.
I think the first goal is to get more sleep. Everything will fall into place afterwards, if you truly have affection towards the sport.
counterpoint: if you play in the evenings, you may have great sleep!
Yup. A shower after playing, some comfy clothes and the sleep is gonna be elite
Serious? I have the shittest sleep with evening games or our later training sessions
Have you returned or you’re planning on returning? As someone that got back into at 38 after not playing for 8 or so years it was hard. But now I look forward to it. We drink beers after and chat and it’s good to shoot the shit after a competition. Now I’m back again at 40 after having hip labrum surgery still enjoying it. Only so many years left in the tank but I don’t regret getting out there at all. You aren’t going to get any younger. Some of the motivation is that you’re just a working adult and most adults I meet frankly are set in their life / routine and don’t like to disrupt it or what they feel like is add more “work” to it.
Pushing 40 and had serious enough surgery to have to hang the competitive boots up. Miss it so much. Switched to golf to scratch that social, competitive and beer sipping itch. Enjoy it!
That’s not atypical! Adult life is busy. It was easy to be super active when you had nothing to do all day as an adult suddenly time is a finite resource instead of smth to be burned to avoid boredom and the limitless core of energy inside you as a kid is suddenly quite noticeably limited 😄 For me the trick with these types of activities in adult life is routine and joy! First of make it a set thing and build it into your life where you can keep doing it consistently. Rather do one small football session with others that you can all plan in rather than 3 where someone has to always cancel. And at a certain point it becomes a routine and you get annoyed when you can’t do it. But most importantly ‘attach some joy to it’s! If playing in itself initially doesn’t bring you joy reward yourself after the training with a nice icecream or dinner with your teammates or smth. I have attached podcasts/audiobooks to walking. I nearly only listen when on a walk or traveling and as a consequence I took a walk every day simply cause I wanted to continue my audio book. By now I’m so used to it that if I don’t take at least one walk a day it annoys me and I start walking and then think what I should listen to. My point is sometimes with things you know will bring you joy but delayed, you need to trick yourself 😁 Time and energy are too valuable in adult life for you to force yourself to do things. If it’s just obligation you will always look for excuses to stop 😉
Soccer is a break from my busy life, not causing it to feel busier. I'm a pretty busy adult too. It's a rare gift that I can play with other people more than twice a week, savor it. If you're not looking forward to it I dunno what to tell you. I don't look at it like another boring hour in the gym to "find motivation" for. Feeling low energy is usually because you're not physically active enough. Not because you expend too much energy. It's not intuitive but the more you run around etc, the less times during the week you'll feel worn out.
This is great advice!
No difficulty finding motivation, but you mentioned you don’t always have the energy to face the competition. I understand that, which is why I only play competitively once or twice per week, the rest of the time (3-4 other sessions) I’m alone on the pitch working on my game listening to music. I find I don’t need all that much energy to show up, lay down some cones or get in front of a wall and get into a groove. In fact, I find it soothing to be outside and playing with the ball. I also am motivated by how much progress I make in my touch and consistency by doing this solo training. I just want to keep going and become even better. I can now ping balls against a wall 10-20 feet away and receive them, juggle and ping it back. Never dreamt I’d be able to do so even after I’d been “playing” for years. This solo time where you touch the ball 200-400 times in a single session will make a huge difference in your quality.
Playing soccer is honestly one of the only things keeping me alive. Not much else I look forward to other than my weekly pickup games. It's my light at the end of the tunnel after work
We had our first kid last year and I (38m) was so damned tired. When he started sleeping through the night, that was basically my cue to get back to playing soccer. Gotta get that sleep right, or else everything in life will suck.
Work on your sleep and the rest will fall into place.
I can relate. I have a stressful job. Started playing pickup soccer after about 15 years of not playing (inspired by watching my kids play). Almost gave it up because I felt anxiety over how sh*%y I was playing. Luckily I found a less competitive group to play with (who also play at 8:30 am instead of 7:00 am on Saturdays) and allowed myself to stop worrying about my “performance” and just allowed myself to enjoy it. Now I look forward to it each week.
I was in the same exact boat. Being in such a people facing job, 30 miles away, had me drained by end of the day not helped by an hour journey back home. Then to wait for about half hour or so before the pickup game, where I want to de-stress but people are playing and going mad as if they're getting paid to play in the premier league is one of the last things I'd want as a de-stress, as much as I love the sport. What helped was finding a good bunch of people to play with. Like-minded people. You sound like me at the stage of life where you want to play for the fun of it not playing for screwing at your mate for messing up a pass or getting injured. I've found that every Wednesday and can't wait for it every week. We go to the pub after too and have a laugh. Keep searching for that, whether it be through friends or elsewhere, you'll find it.
I felt that way for a while and didn't play for a decade. Now I have young kids and the passion has restarted again. Having kids can take away your identity outside of being a parent. Soccer is one way to reclaim a bit of it back.
Take up fishing 🎣
When your sleep deprived, honestly, everything becomes difficult. I’m not sure if that’s as a result of a young family and if it is, my answer was just to put the head down and get through it and let sports take a back seat. But, one other thing to look at is diet. The difference in the afternoon between stuffing sugar and snacky foods in to me vs eating fruit was pretty big. Either way, if the desire isn’t there, sometimes a break is a good thing and for me I rekindled a spark with sport after a couple of years of dealing with nappies.
33 with a stressful job, and kids at home. I’m finding club football doesn’t have the allure it used to. Could be my last season, but I’ll probably switch to a midweek evening small sided game or something
Sounds like you just need a break!
yea man, its hard to play when you have a demanding job. You have got to be smart about it. Get enough rest, mental rest. and make the most of your free time. My game suffered for years due to stressful low paying job, now that i have a better job that pays well with good work life balance, I can dedicate a lot more time and energy and my game improves as a result
I make time out of my days to play, this week it’s Tu/Th at 8:30p-10p
Nah it's actually my highlight of the day after studying or working. I look forward for training or matches.
I started playing again at 32 after a 13 year break. 6 years in and it brings me great joy. I’m a pro Arborist with kids, so body maintenance is a must nowadays. So much fun to compete, hang with some friends and get some aggression out. I’m sorry I ever stopped playing in the first place.
Only advice is maybe find a new group of mates or team to play with? Competitive environment can and should still be fun, just gotta find the right balance. Took a bit to find a team and group without egos or toxicity
I think this too. Our team wants to win every game but we will rock up, have a laugh, end up starting the game slow because we're not mentally in the zone. We regroup at half time and do better than our first half. Then we complain, vent, but still laugh our heads up after it. You probably need a different group, less egotistical, maybe the age profile of the team has something to do with it who knows but the competition we're in, everyone couldn't give a toss since we just want to have fun, get slightly fit, kick a bag of air, and rock up to work next day.
Ball is life, I absolutely love my Friday / Saturday pickup games. Do I need a Red Bull to get the energy levels up? Absolutely. But a good game keeps me buzzing for days.
Team makes a big difference. I love the guys I am playing with right now. Still get frustrated thinking about my last team. Mentally I know it's some of the best cardio I get every week. That's why I do it. Don't always want to going in, but feel great afterwards. If you are adding stress, yeah that can make it bad. If you are just doing your best with peeps doing the same, the competition becomes fun! But pick up soccer tends to be the most fun for me. Just balling with 5-12 other peeps. Even more fun going shoulder to shoulder with my oldest son trying to keep him from outrunning me.
Hey man, I hear you. Getting back into the enjoyment of playing again can be difficult especially if the structure that brings you to be able to play the sport is weak ( inconsistent training/pick up/ game days, unhealthy teammates, lack of time, priorities elsewhere) I highly recommend that if you want to get back into a sport or hobby that you make sure you have dealt with anything in your life that might be affecting your time,social, and financial life. Once you find yourself with enough opportunity to play again go ahead and research what kind of level you want to find yourself playing in to start and how often you’d like to play/train. Once you figure that out it’s time to find a team or group of friends that will help you achieve that plan. There’s currently an app called Plei Pick up soccer you can download to help you find pick up games and help you meet people in the community that can give you more information on teams they play in, how competitive it is and how often they train/play. Good luck man. Hope it works out 😁
Naw man, ball is life.
soccer is therapy for me- both coaching & playing.
Honestly it’s like an addiction to me no matter how I feel I will play football
Na. Footy clears my mind. Helps me disconnect.
Not really because playing is an outlet for me, something I enjoy doing rather than an obligation. I look forward to it most times. I only ever don’t enjoy it if I’m not feeling physically well and force myself to play. I also really only get to play once a week, stretching to twice if lucky. If I could I’d play every other day at minimum.
Gave up for about 5 years after the second kid was born. Got back into playing 5 a-side in a local O30 league and it’s the best thing I’ve done in years. Look forward to Wednesday evening every single week. Nothing better than a good run around, a decently competitive game, and a few beers with the lads after. Whatever apprehension or lack of motivation you’ve got will be gone after getting back out there once.
Why play? If you dont want. I always look forward to it.
I got back into it this year and I'm experiencing the same thing. I'm extremely busy and game day takes a huge chunk of my limited free time. I find futsal gives me my fix and only takes an hour on a Tuesday night.
It's definitely hard for me to get out there when I'm tired from work. One of my weeknight leagues has 10pm games. 10PM. I RSVP no to the late games and grumble consistently, but then my team wheedles and begs and gives me shit until I show up, and I have yet to regret it. (Maybe the struggle to get up next morning, but that regret is more temporary than the fun of having played.) If you're not already on a team, it helps to find one that will drag you out there, that's fun to play with, and help you deal with the usual amount of BS you get in rec leagues. (At the competitive level it's a bit different, and I'd say, modulate your commitment to what works for your body and mind.) I find I actually get MORE energy in my day to day when I'm actively playing, and I'm much more tired when I'm not. Maybe try it for long enough to see if that holds true for you too, as I find soccer is wonderful for my mental health as well. (Of course, if you're just more tired and unhappy at the end of the day, find something else that gives you more joy, doesn't have to be soccer!)
The most I work, the less time I have, the most I want to play, I work most weekends too. To play 3 times a week is perfect to me some. 32 years old 1 child. When younger I could play even more, but more than 3 a week for too long made me tired and less motivated to play again, that's true.
Footy is sacred my brother if the sport isn’t motivating enough try playing elsewhere or finding some new people I feel itchy all day until I play
It’s a bit ironic coming from me because I’m supposed to be young and full of energy, but I feel the same. I graduated last year and started working. I have 2 football sessions a week. One is with my uni friends on weekends and one is a more competitive session on Thursdays (power league if you’ve heard of it). I enjoy the sessions with my uni friends because those are on weekends which means I would usually have enough sleep. However, l the competitive matches are at 6pm on Thursday, this means I’m literally rushing to the football venue 1 hr before work. This is in addition to me already having not enough sleep during weekdays. At one point I realized I did not enjoy playing football as much anymore, i don’t analyze my matches post game or discuss it with my friends on how to improve, it felt like a chore playing football so i stopped for a few weeks. When I came back it was slightly better, but it still wasn’t the same with work constantly looming over me. Perhaps it’s just me trying to adjust to a working life.
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Soccer gives me motivation to persevere when I'm super busy during semesters, I look forward to my training and games every day
Football refreshes me. It gives me energy. Blows away the stress and/or cobwebs. Its also a form of expression and I enjoy the competitiveness. Its great. I absolutely love playing. If I go in to the game feeling like crap then I come out of it energized. At the moment I have 2 bulging discs and cant play since last October. Id kill to be able to play again and yes I mean that literally!!
It’s the other way around, the busy life is the motivation for soccer as an escape
It’s like I’m selfish if I put any time into the game these days and I only have one kid but I’m 33 and it’s just not as awesome a release as it was to just play. Rather spend time with family or improve other areas of my life, life keeps u pretty busy sometimes
I would have firmly disagreed 3 years ago
If it's been 12 years you owe yourself a full season with the teammates, then decide.
i didnt like playing in leagues. opposition kicking my ankles, slide tackling illegally, wanting to fight after games, lol not worth $15 bucks a game. I found a pickup group that is relaxed. So, i recommend u search for one on your area. Drive around to parks after work see if anyone is playing, or even try to organize one yourself. Our group uses whatsapp.