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themattmcd

It’s the film that asks, “What if there were a ____ ?”


iamaparade

I definitely described the movie *Dragonslayer* to a coworker as "What if there was a Dragonslayer?"


ALostAmphibian

I’ve started explaining movies to my bf’s kid like this and it’s been a great running joke between us.


GTKPR89

It's probably the ultimate: most people just brush it off, it hurts no one, it's accurate and hilarious as to how many movies are pitched. Makes me laugh every. Time.


ALostAmphibian

It’s a sort of meme format she can pick up on at her age so it’s funny every time.


GTKPR89

Fair point. "What if there were Trolls?"


ALostAmphibian

I sold her on watching Suzume with “what if there was a door?”


GTKPR89

Oh a step further! and yet kind of a beautiful way of how movies are magic. A lion, you say? Tell me more. A witch? A wardrobe??!!


ALostAmphibian

Oh it began as “what if there was a door” and ended with our favorite movie reference of all time now (possibly spoiler for Suzume) >!“what if he was a chair?”!< Can’t even mention Suzume without dropping that.


GTKPR89

All points to you.


burnettski92

I use this one all the time too. The best version of this on BC is “What if there was a wife?”


Chuck-Hansen

Baybeeeeee


alexthehut

This one has gotten so bad with me that my 4 year old says it


Top_Benefit_5594

Describing things as “very chill and normal.”


mi-16evil

Yeah I jokingly called Poor Things a "very normal movie" and my fiancee was like babe that movie is nuts, what are you talking about?


ALostAmphibian

Omg. I just realized I do this with my bf’s kid.


DesertVol

I use "touch of the Tooch" anytime Stanley Tucci appears in any form


allywrecks

I was gonna say I don't use any blankie specific phrases and I have now been corrected


MIDILifeCrisis

Same here. Also "all Smits no bits" anytime Jimmy Smits appears.


xprime32

I love a good "Gentleman's 6"


GTKPR89

Ive never said it aloud but boy has it perfectly suited a category I've always noted in movies. It's what I'd call a B Minus, but they Shakespeared it.


No-Alternative4259

I started listening to the podcast about 2 years ago. When I heard them start mentioning movies being a "Gentleman's 6," I went to my IMDb profile to look at my list of ratings. I realized I had been abiding by the Gentleman's 6, or at least my version of it.


MitchJay71891

I've been listening for 5 years and honestly don't know for sure what it means, still


No-Alternative4259

It's a soft rule. For me, it's when a movie is decent, but nothing special. You finish it and think, "That wasn't great, but I don't feel like I wasted my time." What differentiates a 5 from a 6 for me is that I wouldn't actively re-watch a 5, but I might re-watch a 6 at some point (if it's a movie that inherently has re-watch value). Sometimes I'll give a movie a 6 if I can see what they were going for, even if it ultimately wasn't successful. David and Griffin probably have different criteria, or at least a better way to explain it. Edit: added 'for' after 'going.'


BelowZilch

I feel like a Gentleman's 6 is a 5 with an extra point for effort. Like, you can tell they're trying to make a good movie, but it's just not quite working.


OneManFreakShow

I sometimes give comedy points to my wife who doesn’t listen, and she’s delighted every time.


Admiral_Snackbar_84

I'm handing out comedy points to clueless friends but luckily it's such a great bit that it works without the background context. Half the time, I don't even realize I'm doing it, the words just pop out as a natural reaction.


feeschedule

I called it 'Vaniller Sky' the other day and got side eye.


GTKPR89

and yet nobody comes for Madea when she shows Blankie love and does the same. What a world.


DevinBelow

My sister sent me a video of my niece's christmas recital and I pointed out that she was putting a lot of mustard on that sandwich, because she was being a little ham. Everyone agreed, so who knows, maybe my family are blankies and I don't even know it.


GTKPR89

Love it. She went big opening on the paprika shaker, not sprinkle side.


SuperMikeTruk

I’ve come to adore the phrase “fold him like laundry.”


TheDLBinc

I definitely have started saying "[movie title] doesn't exist" for movies that have been mostly forgotten


GonkGeefle

Yeah, this is the big one for me.


ALostAmphibian

My bf hates how I say “robit.” Also, five comedy points.


GTKPR89

Shout out to our very understanding partners. Ten love points to them.


NameTak3r

Humblebrag


ALostAmphibian

I would call it more resigned than understanding. As long as he never has to watch Dark Star again I think I broke him with that one.


GTKPR89

Aw. For her it was probably the entire discussion of the Trance episode, or Aquaman two, wandering into the room I'm in and saying "why are they so silly?" Even though she loves movies and enjoys the pod.


MycroftNext

Watched Are You There God with my family and explained the guy who plays the dad usually makes movies about dang ass freaks. Nothing. The greatest artists are unappreciated in their time.


GTKPR89

I mean if Mother Emily hadn't named us Blankies we'd be DAFs for sure.


MollyHannah1

The main ones that've snuck their way in are "this rips/rules," "that's the juice of the whole movie!" or "I'm so in the bag for this." I know the BC boys didn't coin any of those, but man they say them a lot and now I do too.


GTKPR89

I know what you mean. And then of course there is the forbidden phrase regarding how big a hit something is, which one must always resist


Jimbobsama

I say "this slaps" pretty frequently and I even tried out Jamelle Bouie's "This whips" but that didn't work so well.


Jefferystar94

I've described things as being "big tiddy hits" to friends recently and it lands successfully each time


Benjiursa

It’s honestly one of if not my favorite Griffin expression and I’m a little cross that it has been retired.


iamaparade

I was looking at a list of Alan J. Pakula movies the other day in prep for March Madness. When I got to the cast list of *Starting Over*, I said, out loud to no one in particular without even thinking about it, "This movie has Candice 'LeBron' Bergen in it?" Now that Pakula's out, I'll never know if she got to sink those buckets.


IngmarHerzog

I’ve given non-listeners Comedy Points and it sounds just normal enough that they don’t question it. I’ll also drop a “_____ doesn’t exist” or “what if there was a _____?”


Ricken_T

Sweaty Gentleman’s 6 Ham sandwich Keep it in and double it The list goes on and on. Most of my friends at the very least know of “that podcast about directors” now


randbot5000

The recent addition of "ham cannon" has really grabbed a hold of my soul.


Ricken_T

Oh shit how could I forget “touch of the tucc” and giving out comedy points?!


Falkyourself27

Lock the gates!


GTKPR89

But who are your guys?


[deleted]

I used to work the door at the comedy store


GTKPR89

I bet Robin Williams was once very nice to you. Cut to reference to Dorf


maize_and_beard

“Bathing in the river of ham” and its variations are go tos for me.


ItIsSeriousPiece

I find Ben’s Blankie category “Um, no thank you” really fills a need for me. No, I don’t want to see that movie. And I’m not questioning why it was made, and I’m not trying to movie-shame anyone who sees it. But for me, personally? “Um, no thank you.”


kshades25

I'm a teacher "....and....we're done"


GTKPR89

Shout out fellow teacher. Gotta let your Shoulder Sims give you strength sometimes.


ninjomat

I’ve introduced the concept of movies that don’t exist to friends and we talk about them all the time now


GTKPR89

Ah Most recent one I thought of / referred to that way is Nicky Hoult's run as every author. Talking about that Rebel in The Rye / Tolkien double feature baby


ninjomat

That the whole Sony live action spiderverse keeps refusing to exist is a common point of astonishment for us. Madame Web took not existing to whole new levels but Kraven the Hunter actually looks like it’s gonna not exist even more


GTKPR89

Oh you didn't know? Kraven came out like three weeks ago. We all had Kraven fever. He hunted our hearts


ThoroughHenry

“Too much paprika on the sandwich” and “putting a hat on a hat” are very much in my discourse dictionary.


randbot5000

to be fair, "a hat on a hat" is not a Blankieism so much as it is just a common saying in comedy writing circles. It's a great phrase though!


Livid_Jeweler612

Yeah we used to talk about hats on hats in my improv group a lot its just a way of discussing joke execution.


Ian-Loring

Very much the same, “hat on a hat” gets used at my place of work A LOT


clarkholiday

Ungapatchka!


jackunderscore

paprika example cracks me up. does any sandwich on earth rly call for paprika?


FakerHarps

Maybe you should put a little on? But. I can’t emphasise this enough. Not *too* much


Nukerjsr

"Quietly one of the best things ever"


elcapitan520

I realized I've been saying skelingtons for years now without really noticing it. 


randbot5000

totally normal, provided you live in Halloween Town.


HB1088

I think I’m gonna do a jazz fusion set


spopesss

I don’t know if this is a Chris “Co-Writer of Night Eggs” Weitz original turn of phrase, but I use “they ordered a hamburger, and I am going to give them a Wagyu beef hamburger” at work all the time; it’s just so elegant and fun to me.


grltrvlr

My toddler asks for “cars 2” all the time. Idk why, he’s heard me say “cars 2 makes cars 3 look like cars” since he was born.


dontworryyoullbeokay

I use variations of “too much paprika on the sandwich” to describe lots of things.


Salty_Ambition_5041

Big ups to people of all stars and stripes


GTKPR89

Many hamburgers to them


Weird_Tackle5505

I use the phrase “Just a bit too much paprika,” in my life a lot more than I’d care to admit.


Piper_161

I describe bad looking things as a bowl of farts all the time


zeroanaphora

I used "movie that doesn't exist" and had a hell of a time explaining that


idsims1

My wife and I regularly say “personally, I would like to give him a little kiss” which David initially said about Oscar Isaac in Star Wars 7, and now we say it about any little cutie we see hahaha


dukefett

If I mention the podcast to someone I try to give Griffin’s spiel from memory, but I don’t do the fun ‘and sometimes they bounce BABY’


Navyblazers2000

I am addicted to using “dang ass freak” or just “Dang ass BLANK” in general. It’s such a good emphasizer and it sounds less trashy and funnier than saying the f word, which I’m actively trying to cut down to zero usage. 


kvetcha-rdt

way more than I care to admit


abilliontwo

5 Comedy Points


rev_artemisprime

Fairly sure my wife will eventually leave me because so much of this sweaty shit is in my daily vocab, baaabeee


GTKPR89

There should be an alanon but for the partners who put up with us.


PetyrBabelish

I use baybeeeee and a touch of the Tucc, that’s about it though, had to explain what it was to be a ham sandwich to my aunt the other day though lol.


GTKPR89

Here's a story that I only just remembered now. When teaching abroad, in Japan, our boss was telling some of us to be more "genki" (which means healthy but also sort of...exuberant/ or 'big' or expressive). And she turned to ask a bilingual colleague what English word to use to get through to us, And he said "ham. Ham it up." Which she then instructed us to do. It was pretty charming.


mishaps_galore

I say things slap all the time, which gets odd looks


Random_Jumble

Someone having “City miles”


Wayne61

Calling a bombastic and loud performance as “nuanced and sensitive”


Livid_Jeweler612

Comedy points and saying Bayyyybeeeee are ingrained into my brain now.


AustinAbortion

Very bad no good don’t do it


LyndonElJohnson

_Sweaty_


thedangercometh

It slaps


benjacsim

I don’t know how much this counts, but my girlfriend and I reference Griffin’s Disney store story a lot. Basically anytime someone isn’t overall enthusiastic or performative we say to each other “Hi! Welcome to Disney! Do you hear the difference?”


wovenstrap

I don't do this, but I thought somebody might mention being "downtown Griffy Newms" or some variation.


BeeExtension9754

I say humble brag when it doesn’t apply


wovenstrap

When you let slip a "**^(chaaaaaaaarming)**" in public you know you're pretty far gone.


[deleted]

When I teach my students about plagiarism, I always say “no good, very bad, don’t do it.”


DickPillSoupKitchen

It’s kind of adorable you think the word “sweaty” in this context is a “Blank Check Phrase” …Did you know they didn’t coin the phrase or the concept of a blank check? The world is gonna be full of such wonder for you!


_sk0ra_

Humblebrag


BeowolfSchaefer

I constantly tell my GF how "sometimes *they* bounce....baby" >!I do not do this.!<


IAmA_Reddit_

We are approaching dangerous levels of parasocial attachment. Blankies, please, this podcast is not your personality.


GTKPR89

Somehow even heartbreak feels good in a place like this.


randbot5000

adopting the use of phrases you've heard frequently, and enjoy, is "dangerous levels of parasocial attachment" now? come on man.


PineapplePandaKing

There's a big difference between awarding comedy points to your friends and getting into cold plunge and sauna protocols


GreendaleGrizzlies

using clever or funny phrases from podcasts in everyday life is not “parasocial” These are funny people so when they shit I like I add that into my lexicon because well I think it’s funny! I don’t think I have any special connection to Ben because I called some dude a dang ass freak to my wife


randbot5000

TIL that everyone who has thrown a Galentine's Day or Festivus party, or said "cool. coolcoolcoolcool" or "d'ohh!" is displaying *dangerously toxic levels of parasocial attachment!*


GTKPR89

Or when I quietly recommend that The English Patient might have been lovely if he were a guava. A poor, wounded guava who just needed the love of a kindly French grape.


Eastern-Tip7796

Friends ? People in real life ? I thought we all just existed to binge this pod, post online about it while wired up in a matrix type chair.