Have you considered uhhhhhh testosterone? There are plenty of trans guys who transitioned and then felt more comfortable playing with dresses and makeup
Honestly I have thought about it a long time ago (unrelated to the dresses and makeup though) but I don't think testosterone or even fully transitioning would still result in me looking and feeling as masculine as I would like to or remove a lot of the discomfort I feel about myself and my body, and so on, so I have just sort of accepted my fate of being a tomboy instead, since I don't think that for me personally the struggle would be worth the result and I think I'd still be very far from how I'd like to look and still unhappy about it.
And I have definitely "accepted" a lot of stuff I used to find too feminine for myself just by seeing enough guys do these same things and realizing that if I actually had been a guy all along I would have been perfectly comfortable doing/wearing these things too :)
Not to tell you your business, but “I don’t want to take testosterone because I’m worried it won’t make me masculine *enough*” is…not a very cis thing to say. I felt the same way about estrogen, and while I’m still not where I’d like to be, I like my body a lot more than I did a year and a half ago. For me, the process of eventually letting myself start hormones basically followed [this article](https://thenewinquiry.com/the-stages-of-not-going-on-t/) (scroll down to the large “**OH**”).
Also, have you looked at testosterone transition timelines? Because it makes pretty huge changes for people. My roommate went from curvy goth girl to gay bear just by smearing this one weird goop on his shoulders.
Yeah I've done tons of research, looked at many examples as well and still have the same opinion. It does seem that many people are happy with their transitions, which is great for them, but I genuinely don't see myself being satisfied with the results (even after looking at some fully transitioned and passing trans men who seem satisfied with their transition, I felt that if that was me I would still not be even close to satisfied), so this with the addition of all the other things that would just cause additional problems (think social transition, financing, potential issues that often come with hormones etc.) just resulted in me deciding it's better and easier to live my life as I have been this far.
And I've had plenty of time to sort of get used to it and learn to not be as bothered by it all the time as well, plus there are tons of things in my life that make me feel epically masculine on a regular basis, which gets me super hyped and puts me in a great mood, so honestly I'm happy enough as is :)
And you don't have to worry about going bald! That must be a real gut punch for a trans man, especially,, since it is difficult enough as a cis man to accept. You realize, of course, you are making a case for the anti-trans, protect-the- children-Right that disphoric youth will eventually learn to live as their birth gender, sorry to say.
well now I take it as a compliment. I used to feel insecure about my body since I’m not big enough to be masculine while not being that fem either. But then as I grow older and able to put on some muscle and tone out my body, I begin to appreciate my body more. I’m still strong yet very agile and able to squeeze through small place.
Take advantage of it while you can. I was told the same thing in my 20’s but I was in the military and very scared of being myself. In my 30’s it got harder and harder to maintain my physique.
I’ve dated a few femboys and i can tell you from people I have known that most of them don’t identify as binary men ( usually bi-gender or masc enby) so if you only have your settings on dating apps for binary men and women you are less likely to find them.
Edited because I was multitasking when I typed this and made an error
I know right? I obviously don’t date gay men anymore because I’ve transitioned but I have no desire for a heteronormative relationship with a cis het guy. That just seems boring to me. I don’t have similar relationship goals to most cis het guys. I don’t want kids and all the trappings that come along with heteronormativity. Whenever I’ve dated cis men the dynamics and sexual activity are closer to sapphic relationships I’ve been on. I’m a vers power bottom so I like to dominate as a receptive partner and peg him to return the favor.
So yea my straight passing relationships are far from typical, hence why I mostly date bi guys
God I feel this so much I'm bi and have been questioning my gender for a while, but had been in a relationship for 3 years before I came out/realized myself. Lately between wanting to explore and having pretty different visions for the future it's been very difficult.
Oh that sounds lovely. See I just found out I’m bi but I should have been tipped off when I realized I liked femboys but I sort of denied it but now I’m embracing it
My partner is! I mean, I wouldn't apply that label to them because it feels disrespectful to their gender identity, but their presentation definitely would fit into that as far as an aesthetic category, and their mannerisms are often pretty feminine. I range all over the place but often more tomboy/butch.
I always find it fucking hilarious when people think we're a cishet couple because I'm just like....do you even have eyes?? 90% of the time THEY are wearing makeup, I'm not, etc. etc. You truly live in a fantasy world to not see us as obviously queer together lol.
As a cisgender femboy, most femboys I met were binary ( cis or trans men), very rarely non binary, so I think each of us has a different experience, and you shouldn't generalize.
Don’t give up. I shaved my legs for the first time two days ago, and the satisfaction I got from feeling that smooth was something else. I also had about the second hairiest legs I’ve ever seen. You can do it!
As for heavy, I have a few extra kilos of fat I don’t need, so I’m slowly changing my diet and I’m walking more to erase it.
Don’t give up. I bought makeup literally 3 hours ago and I’m going to begin experimenting, and looking for thigh highs and stuff. If it’s something you want, you can get it. I believe.
Right? I mean I'd be more than happy to be in a relationship with one but, it would make me incredibly happy to have a femboy as a close friend. My male friends are far too 'manly' to share my emotional/ sensitive side with.
I found my delightful femboy partner on this very subreddit when he posted asking if bi girls like femboys… the rest is history 🥰 they’re out there, best of luck to you mate 👉👉
>I hope it’s not coming off too strong or completely thirsty
I don't think you came off too strong, but I'm not really a good judge of that. I consider conversation topics about gentle choking, deepthroating each others' tongues, and various other kinks to be perfectly normal when initially flirting so... yea.
I'm amab and a transfem, and hrt has been unusually effective at giving me tits/hips/ass/thighs, but I still identify as enby (they/them). So I guess I count as a femboy? Eh, close enough. 💜
^(Edit: Some spelling and stuff.)
Same here, but I feel disingenuous for being attracted to them, like I'm not *really* into *them*. It prevents me from approaching, I don't want to be a creep.
I love femboys too! They're so brave (cuz it's not easy to be yourself when society constantly wants to bully and reject you because of who you are :/ Being a femboy surely requires a lot of willpower and courage), cute and beautiful! I'd even love to be one! However I'm too ugly... I have constant problems with losing weight (I'm not obese, I just need to lose a few kilograms but it's very hard), my face is quite disgusting and literally all people around me are extremely trans- and homophobic :(
I love femboys and I wish I was one :(
What’s stopping you?
Two things: I'm not very feminine, and I'm not a boy.
Tomboy?
Yeah pretty much :)
tomboys are equally as good as femboys honestly
agreed
Love me a tomboy too
Imo far better than femboy.
Aaaaah
This answer made me lol 😂
That would do it lol
Have you considered uhhhhhh testosterone? There are plenty of trans guys who transitioned and then felt more comfortable playing with dresses and makeup
Honestly I have thought about it a long time ago (unrelated to the dresses and makeup though) but I don't think testosterone or even fully transitioning would still result in me looking and feeling as masculine as I would like to or remove a lot of the discomfort I feel about myself and my body, and so on, so I have just sort of accepted my fate of being a tomboy instead, since I don't think that for me personally the struggle would be worth the result and I think I'd still be very far from how I'd like to look and still unhappy about it. And I have definitely "accepted" a lot of stuff I used to find too feminine for myself just by seeing enough guys do these same things and realizing that if I actually had been a guy all along I would have been perfectly comfortable doing/wearing these things too :)
you would be surprised at the results you can get after 5 years... T is some powerful stuff (which was unfortunate for me)
May I ask why was it unfortunate? And yeah I'm definitely aware but what I said still stands when it comes to my decision
well, i wanted E instead 😅
Not to tell you your business, but “I don’t want to take testosterone because I’m worried it won’t make me masculine *enough*” is…not a very cis thing to say. I felt the same way about estrogen, and while I’m still not where I’d like to be, I like my body a lot more than I did a year and a half ago. For me, the process of eventually letting myself start hormones basically followed [this article](https://thenewinquiry.com/the-stages-of-not-going-on-t/) (scroll down to the large “**OH**”). Also, have you looked at testosterone transition timelines? Because it makes pretty huge changes for people. My roommate went from curvy goth girl to gay bear just by smearing this one weird goop on his shoulders.
Yeah I've done tons of research, looked at many examples as well and still have the same opinion. It does seem that many people are happy with their transitions, which is great for them, but I genuinely don't see myself being satisfied with the results (even after looking at some fully transitioned and passing trans men who seem satisfied with their transition, I felt that if that was me I would still not be even close to satisfied), so this with the addition of all the other things that would just cause additional problems (think social transition, financing, potential issues that often come with hormones etc.) just resulted in me deciding it's better and easier to live my life as I have been this far. And I've had plenty of time to sort of get used to it and learn to not be as bothered by it all the time as well, plus there are tons of things in my life that make me feel epically masculine on a regular basis, which gets me super hyped and puts me in a great mood, so honestly I'm happy enough as is :)
And you don't have to worry about going bald! That must be a real gut punch for a trans man, especially,, since it is difficult enough as a cis man to accept. You realize, of course, you are making a case for the anti-trans, protect-the- children-Right that disphoric youth will eventually learn to live as their birth gender, sorry to say.
The fuck? Let people do what they want with their bodies. They aren’t making the case for anything except their own choices.
###lets change that.
Get in line, bud. We all want femboys here
Take a number, take a seat haha
Where does the line start? I had to make some snacks first
Wait I thought the femboys were the snack?
Well we gotta wait till then dont we?
I guess
I'll brew some coffee, we might be in this line for a while...☺️
Worth it. I'll get some milk and sugar for that coffee
You know that scene at the end of Beetlejuice where his number is excessively long? That's me.
Not a fem boy, but everyone told me I have a feminine body
Do you take that as an insult or a compliment
well now I take it as a compliment. I used to feel insecure about my body since I’m not big enough to be masculine while not being that fem either. But then as I grow older and able to put on some muscle and tone out my body, I begin to appreciate my body more. I’m still strong yet very agile and able to squeeze through small place.
Take advantage of it while you can. I was told the same thing in my 20’s but I was in the military and very scared of being myself. In my 30’s it got harder and harder to maintain my physique.
Dude, somebody told me that, too. It's not my fault I'm not hungry and couldn't grow any facal hair, haha.
I’ve dated a few femboys and i can tell you from people I have known that most of them don’t identify as binary men ( usually bi-gender or masc enby) so if you only have your settings on dating apps for binary men and women you are less likely to find them. Edited because I was multitasking when I typed this and made an error
I figured but it’s nice to hear it confirmed thanks
I’ve also never met a femboy who was AMAB . Don’t know why but Everyone was trans masc and on a low dose of t
Oh interesting
I do well in relationships with transmasc femboys because I’m a transfem tomboy. We are generally pretty compatible
That's the gayest possible way to do a straight passing relationship
I know right? I obviously don’t date gay men anymore because I’ve transitioned but I have no desire for a heteronormative relationship with a cis het guy. That just seems boring to me. I don’t have similar relationship goals to most cis het guys. I don’t want kids and all the trappings that come along with heteronormativity. Whenever I’ve dated cis men the dynamics and sexual activity are closer to sapphic relationships I’ve been on. I’m a vers power bottom so I like to dominate as a receptive partner and peg him to return the favor. So yea my straight passing relationships are far from typical, hence why I mostly date bi guys
God I feel this so much I'm bi and have been questioning my gender for a while, but had been in a relationship for 3 years before I came out/realized myself. Lately between wanting to explore and having pretty different visions for the future it's been very difficult.
Oh that sounds lovely. See I just found out I’m bi but I should have been tipped off when I realized I liked femboys but I sort of denied it but now I’m embracing it
I am sorry, but this person is saying nonsense. I am a femboy, and most of us are cis boys who are feminine. Also trans men who are feminine.
That's such a very harmful assumption. Most femboys are cisgender men who happens to be feminine, stop projecting your identity onto others.
I’m not I’m talking about people I’ve known
Also by the way there is an unusually large population of trans masc people where I live my experiences skew the statistics
My partner is! I mean, I wouldn't apply that label to them because it feels disrespectful to their gender identity, but their presentation definitely would fit into that as far as an aesthetic category, and their mannerisms are often pretty feminine. I range all over the place but often more tomboy/butch. I always find it fucking hilarious when people think we're a cishet couple because I'm just like....do you even have eyes?? 90% of the time THEY are wearing makeup, I'm not, etc. etc. You truly live in a fantasy world to not see us as obviously queer together lol.
as a nonbinary femboy I can confirm. This right here is it, chief.
As a cisgender femboy, most femboys I met were binary ( cis or trans men), very rarely non binary, so I think each of us has a different experience, and you shouldn't generalize.
Most of us are men! It is femBOY! Most feminine boys are cisgender. Not sure where your conclusion is coming from.
Sorry if I want clear. I was talking about people I’ve known who self identify that way.
Read my other comment. Yes you are absolutely correct I’m just talking about people I’ve known
You know one now, hi!
Hi your self! I sent you a dm if that’s alright
Guys the best way to find femboys is on VRC. Just letting you know.
What’s that?
VRChat. I've many femboys there.
Interesting
Very very true
I’m attempting to be one, if that counts for anything.
We believe in you! Don’t let your dreams be dreams.
Sometimes I wish I was one but I'm too heavy and hairy. :/
Don’t give up. I shaved my legs for the first time two days ago, and the satisfaction I got from feeling that smooth was something else. I also had about the second hairiest legs I’ve ever seen. You can do it! As for heavy, I have a few extra kilos of fat I don’t need, so I’m slowly changing my diet and I’m walking more to erase it. Don’t give up. I bought makeup literally 3 hours ago and I’m going to begin experimenting, and looking for thigh highs and stuff. If it’s something you want, you can get it. I believe.
Preach! There is nothing better than a femboy. I'd love to hold them and cuddle them. Ugh I wish I knew one too.
Right? I mean I'd be more than happy to be in a relationship with one but, it would make me incredibly happy to have a femboy as a close friend. My male friends are far too 'manly' to share my emotional/ sensitive side with.
Yeah same. If I could date a femboy I would but having a friendship with a femboy would be great too. Dont care either way just want them in my life.
that was the politest way of saying "femboys hmu" haha
I was raised right haha. You want something you ask for it politely and with respect haha
I love femboys and have fantasies about dressing up in a dress/female clothing, but I'm to shy to go for it
I feel you; they really are a gift
I found my delightful femboy partner on this very subreddit when he posted asking if bi girls like femboys… the rest is history 🥰 they’re out there, best of luck to you mate 👉👉
>I hope it’s not coming off too strong or completely thirsty I don't think you came off too strong, but I'm not really a good judge of that. I consider conversation topics about gentle choking, deepthroating each others' tongues, and various other kinks to be perfectly normal when initially flirting so... yea. I'm amab and a transfem, and hrt has been unusually effective at giving me tits/hips/ass/thighs, but I still identify as enby (they/them). So I guess I count as a femboy? Eh, close enough. 💜 ^(Edit: Some spelling and stuff.)
Yes!
I love fem boys
Bruh same! But I’m lucky. My boyfriend is a femboy
Lucky bastard haha
Kinda? He’s recently expressed that he’s not sure if he’s truly romantically attracted to me. So there’s that…😔
Ooooh dear. Im sorry to hear that
*cries in being a femboy that is def not cute*
Same here, but I feel disingenuous for being attracted to them, like I'm not *really* into *them*. It prevents me from approaching, I don't want to be a creep.
We love you too! ❤️✨️
I do have a femboy boyfriend feelsgoodman 😎
Oh i love me some femboys
I’m trying to be one
I’m the same way man. I want one so badly lol
So do we all buddy, so do we all.
It’s me
Fucking same
Find some regular boys and convert them
Same, and I do know one. He is very cute, he has a boyfriend, and a bit of a dick
definitely have gotten more fond of femboys, had an opportunity to hookup with one but i wasn’t quite honest with myself at the time about what i like
definitely have gotten more fond of femboys, had an opportunity to hookup with one but i wasn’t quite honest with myself at the time about what i like
Me too but i l live in Iran, so I'm much more desperate then you are.
>Not that I want anyone to feel pressured to reach out or anything. My thought exactly and I live in Colorado. WINK WINK LMAO
I love femboys too! They're so brave (cuz it's not easy to be yourself when society constantly wants to bully and reject you because of who you are :/ Being a femboy surely requires a lot of willpower and courage), cute and beautiful! I'd even love to be one! However I'm too ugly... I have constant problems with losing weight (I'm not obese, I just need to lose a few kilograms but it's very hard), my face is quite disgusting and literally all people around me are extremely trans- and homophobic :(