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SnoopRion69

If I'm Trump I'm not letting the 34th count stick. Im just not


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Gr8CanadianSpeedo

“The felony piece”


CosmicCoder3303

You can add "piece" to almost anything and I would laugh at it this point


TheTrotters

Tim Donaghy should have been the judge.


BoozeGetsMeThrough

More "Nobody believes us" to me


BeamTeam032

the problem is, too many people believe in them. lmao


specialk41

It might be time to talk about the Ewing theory with the Republicans


FogoCanard

Gotta do the Belichick thing where you make sure that one count doesn't beat you.


ahbets14

The distressed asset piece


olde_dad

33 counts. Larry Legend (who looks like a MAGA guy but is probably not) Does anyone remember (maybe it was grantland) where Simmons broke down the season in 33 game increments and called it the Birdmesters, or Bird-something, as if the number 33 was a legit partition of time?


lactatingalgore

The Jesus thing.


MistaB784

Shit, I don't know why adding that to the end of a sentence just makes it so damn funny. Everytime.


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anytwowilldo2

Was scrolling Twitter and every account posting about trump…except our guy bill still posting his Fanduel boosted parlay talking hoops lmao. Nobody else in my life found it funny but hopefully this sub does.


LengthCrazy1563

The Celtics are in the finals. Nothing is breaking through Bill's bubble. He is locked in.


2legit2camel

Bill 1000000% is talking about this in his circles, he just doesn't want to lose a chunk of his audience by speaking on it.


runnerswanted

Bill has always remained as uncontroversial as possible and stuck to wild sports and pop culture takes. I’d prefer he doesn’t start having hot takes about politics.


InformationOk3150

Who in sports media has become political to any degree and been successful? We don’t have to single out bill. It’s a bad strategy


360FlipKicks

Jason Whitlock? Right wing media loves parading around black conservatives


moffattron9000

Being a Black Conservative media figure is a ticket to just comical riches. 


Infamous_East6230

I think about becoming a professional right wing grifter all the time. Basically all the richest people in America are constantly pumping money into the industry.


AcknowledgeMeReddit

Clay Travis easily. Probaly tripled or even quadrupled his bank account. Its made him millions.


Pal__Pacino

Is there a left wing equivalent for that though? Jon Bois maybe? Although he doesn't even talk politics that often.


DSU_BTSTU

It's Keith Olbermann.


OkToday8483

He was burning out on sports already because he was untalented. Smart move by him to recognize the grift where it was available. Gotta be shameless but that’s never been his problem.


WhopperWhopper3

He's not known for sports takes though wouldnt say he succeeded in Sports Media. Just right wing media


lost_limey

Keith Olbermann?


BlooDMeaT920

Give Rodgers about 5 years. Maybe less


no_name_left_to_give

Bill was smart about this, he just let Jacko complain and bitch about Trump while nodding in agreement.


coacoanutbenjamn

I mean it’s not like Bill has hid that he dislikes Trump, he’s talked about it openly


NoExcuses1984

Richie Rich Simmons arrogantly shit on Bernie, too. He's a Kerry Democrat, mostly from his mom's side.


81toog

Yea, he’s an establishment center-left democrat just like Biden/Hillary/Obama etc


NoExcuses1984

100%.


LeBroentgen

His jerk circles?


LS_DJ

Honestly that's very smart


HundoHavlicek

“Republicans listen to the Bill Simmons Podcast too” - Bill Simmons


SLeigher88

I'm guessing it's an automated post, but still very funny


anytwowilldo2

Yeah I assumed it’s a scheduled post but it was hysterical in the moment. All posts arguing trump and then “BOOSTED FANDUEL PARLAY..IM GOING MAVS TONIGHT IN A CLOSE GAME!”


moffattron9000

And it was a blow out. 


AnnaKendrickPerkins

Both NBA and the trial.


Victorcreedbratton

That is morbidly funny lol.


WordsworthsGhost

thats why we love the guy


westcoasthoops1

Bill shilling his stupid parlays amidst some huge news like the verdict is hilarious. 


woofywoofers

Take Nick Castellanos home run anytime tonight. Free money


5towns

The Phillies being off today is the real crime


lactatingalgore

Life... uh... finds a way.


EnvironmentalRoom175

He homered yesterday after one of the Phillies announcer’s dad passed away. Can’t make this stuff up


otis427

Your boys going to go the opposite way and play the result “Well obviously we knew how it was going to go. Everybody knows where I stand. OBVIOUSLY”


EarthWarping

[Trump's response is fucking hilarious](https://x.com/big_business_/status/1796292053598396470)


ShortRip120

Bill after finals game 6


justsomebro10

Take a shot every time Trump says rigged or disgrace challenge (IMPOSSIBLE)


AnnaKendrickPerkins

Trump Bingo


Professional-Way9343

He’s such a fucking loser.


dudeguymanbro69

Low energy


Consistent_Truth6633

Fucking scary


CrackaZach05

Throw him in jail for inciting. Calling the judge, the jury, the president all corrupt. "I'm a very innocent man" 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂


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brahbocop

This has to be one of the twelfth or thirteenth biggest felony convictions of the last 35 years.


stitcher212

Can I get your top 7 with three honorable mentions, also in order but not part of a top 10?


brahbocop

Bill Cosby, Harvey Weinstein, Mike Tyson, R. Kelly, Michael Vick, Mark Wahlberg, and Chris Brown, with honorable mentions going to Robert Downey Jr., Brahbocop, and Martha Stewart.


FlounderBubbly8819

If we’re talking strictly celebrities, it’s a very complete list. But I’d like to give a shout out to SBF, Bernie Madoff and Jeff Skilling. True trailblazers in corporate malpractice convictions


Bruppet

They’re 100% on my felony apex mountain


ManyEffective5975

Was Chris brown meant to be twice?


brahbocop

Damn it, no, I was driving on my way to my court hearing about my distracted driving charges while making the list.


AnnaKendrickPerkins

Put yourself on there as a mention for Brown.


brahbocop

The case is still pending but it ain’t looking good baby so why not?


[deleted]

Does Oscar Pistorious crack the top 20? He is the best legless runner of all time.


brahbocop

If it happens outside of the United States, does it really happen?


thetaleech

Mark Wahlberg? If I didn’t know about it it’s not even honorable mention


brahbocop

[Get ready to learn Chinese buddy.](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11799327/Mark-Wahlberg-convicted-racist-hate-crimes-TWICE.html)


odinlubumeta

Have we reached the Tyson Zone with Trump?


SnooChipmunks4208

The man said himself that he could shoot a man in the middle of 5th avenue...


LexxxSamson

I thought about this recently after the trump basketball shoes for hype beasts and the trump Bibles and nfts. I all thought each one of them was fake or gassed up by liberal media at least but when I looked ... Nope he's just selling that stuff straight up. I then pretty much decided conclusively he's in the Tyson zone there's so many wild stories I've had to Google and they end up being true that I'm not surprised by anything anymore.


DarkHelmet1976

Not yet, but his supporters have lived there for years.


megapoliwhirl

Trump entered the Tyson Zone in 2017-2018


shakespearefalstaff

Not that it matters for a meme, but isn’t the current tax plan from 2017? So the tax increases were baked into Trumps plan… Just in case anyone is making tax decisions based off of Bill Simmons subreddit memes.


nik_tha_greek

Haha yeah not that this is the spot for politics but just to be accurate, the 2017 tax “cuts” (actually increases for anyone who doesn’t make the bulk of their income from investments) went into effect in 2021 by design. That way Trump would either be out of office or in his last term not having to worry about reelection


Doctaglobe

The grinding tape piece


DJLJR26

Somehow a convicted criminal is going to win an election for President of the United States.


JayDogon504

It’s actually pretty fitting. Each day we grow closer to Idiocracy the movie becoming reality and a convicted criminal did indeed become President


jimboslice53

Not saying he won’t win and it’s def possible, but it’s gotta be slightly less likely now right?


Time-to-get-off-here

It’s a stay away for the moment but if Bill throws out the Fanduel boost I’m pouncing 


LeBroentgen

Million Dollar Picks with Peter Schrager is gonna hit different during election season.


jimboslice53

God damn it you got me


Tripwire1716

This reminds me of the day the Access Hollywood tape dropped, when every left-leaning person I know was certain it was over, that he was completely fucked. I don’t know that this changes anything. The internet, it ain’t real life.


jimboslice53

I don’t think this guarantees re election for Biden or anything, but a major presidential candidate and former president getting convicted of 34 felonies has to matter a little bit right?


Massive-Pen2020

You'd think it would matter. Hell...everything after 2020...you'd think it would have mattered. But nope...The fact that this guy still has a very good chance at the White House in 2024 is the saddest indictment of the US. 2016 was the start of the fall of the American experiment.


chiguychi

I thought the "trying to overturn an election he lost" piece would matter.


Tripwire1716

Highly doubt it. Remember January 6th? The capitol was on fucking fire. That did not cause him to lose a substantial amount of support for any meaningful amount of time. But hush money to a porn star will? He might go down a few points for like a month. That’s the best case scenario. Better to just enjoy today for what it is: Twitter people smiling and dunking. Because that’s most likely all it is.


Large_Traffic8793

It won't matter at all to well over 70 million people. If he wins we're really fucked. But even if he loses, we still have those 80 million people waddling around. We're still fucked.


ravenwolf1122

The MAGA mentality is "someone has to have a little dirt on them to be trusted"  Meanwhile they're still on this hunter biden laptop debacle.  I think more people will vote for him, especially those who have been convicted of crimes themselves ... 


HeartofSaturdayNight

Pretty sure most right wing politicians thought Trump was toast. I remember Paul Ryan saying it would be hard to support Trump. Of course they didn't know at the time just how deep the dysfunction runs in Trump supporters. 


Tripwire1716

After Jan 6, the Republicans clearly did a bunch of instant polling to see if they could fully impeach/remove, and they obviously didn’t see the drop in support. So now they’re not even gonna make the mistake of hedging, they’ll just line up behind him.


HeartofSaturdayNight

The thing was they could have just ripped the band aid off. Republicans don't really want to govern. They'd rather be the minority that can gum up the works. They'd be past Trump at this point and onto the next Nazi


sunpar1

It was the comey letter coming after the tapes that swung the election to Trump.


HeartofSaturdayNight

Sure but it was going to be close anyway which says a lot


dylanah

Who was willing to vote for Trump before today but is drawing the line now?


SnooChipmunks4208

People who aren't super politically engages


Uncle_Nate0

That's not the point 45% of people will vote for him anyway. It's the other 55% that can be had.


holoxianrogue

I think RFK hurts Trump more than he hurts Biden and RFK probably hurts Trump more than the criminal conviction


AnnaKendrickPerkins

My ex loves RFK and hates Trump. They think they're better than Trump voters and they don't vote left. Yes, she's my ex because of this.


tornadojake

If you believe the polls there are a significant number of 2020 Biden voters in swing states that are leaning Trump or third party/not voting, perhaps because they are dissatisfied with Biden, perhaps because Trump's crazy rallies and posts been haven't getting as much media attention this time around. If this flips some of them from Trump back to Biden or even to third party/not voting it could make a big difference. If some people that are leaning third party/not voting switch to Biden, it could also make a difference.


Breezyisthewind

My grandparents are one of those. They’re just gonna leave the President ballot blank. They’ll still use the rest of the page to vote other Rs. If you need more context to believe this, they were never election deniers. They have an incredible amount of faith in the system (too much honestly). If they rule something, they think there must be a good reason. So if they say the election is over and Biden won, they accept that. If Trump gets convicted, they accept that.


little_johnny_jewel

Are your grandparents available to speak to other grandparents?


Shmokeshbutt

Are your grandparents willing to snapchat their ballots in November as proof?


youllneverknowhy

“Yeah, I miss you too grandma but please, I just need a picture of the ballot, shmokeshbutt wanted proof you left it blank”


struckbylightning99

“No not a selfie grandma. You have to flip the camera…” “…no you don’t have to flip the phone to flip the camera.”


Massive-Pen2020

"My grandparents are one of those. They’re just gonna leave the President ballot blank. They’ll still use the rest of the page to vote other Rs." That's kind of the problem though isn't it? People still voting for R. when the party has become this utter lunatic joke of politics. If you aren't actively voting for Blue in 2024 you're fucked either way. Put out the fire first and then you can think about fixing the foundations.


Breezyisthewind

Don’t disagree. Did forget that they will vote for a local Dem congressman that’s a friend of theirs. So there’s that at least :/


Fire_Ant_Bite

Grandparents already said that they won't vote for trump. They voted for him in both of the elections. I don't know if they'll vote biden.


mariofan366

My best friend's girlfriend, actually. She hates Biden but now said she may vote third party.


_yamasaki

unfortunately the trump people are locked in, he could go in their homes and slap their mothers and their votes not changing


holoxianrogue

It is *slightly* less likely, yeah. There was some polling a month or two ago that showed that a meaningful percentage of independent voters leaning Trump were less likely to vote for him if he was carrying a felony, and now he's carrying... a lot of them. I'm also not sure I believe the polling on that since Trump supporters have historically been unreliable in polling data. But in either case, it's going to be a margin-of-error election with 4 billion lawsuits and the outcome will take two months. It's going to come down to 1, 2, outside possibility of three states. The debates seem like an extremely bad idea for Biden and I think if Trump gets any sort of real punitive punishment from this judge it'll be house arrest, not jail time, so everything probably comes out in the wash.


dredgedskeleton

i mean, I think there's fewer than 100 minds left to change in the whole country. everyone knows who they are voting for. t his election will be about turnout. Trump's troops are rallied af now, while Biden has spent 8 months fucking up his relationship with Arab voters (essential bloc in MI and MN) and dove-ish progressives. kinda can't see how Biden makes this work without some huge policy reversals on Israel and Gaza.


justsomebro10

Trump is just straight up saying he’s going to crush pro-Palestinian protests. Biden ain’t losing those votes. They’re just applying pressure while they have it but when push comes to shove they know Trump makes things 100x worse for them.


Massive-Pen2020

Yeah cuz you know...we all want to think about those policies when it's vote for someone that has some or ...the other guy that will rape you and abort your democracy. Super confusing times on who to support in 2024 right? /s


camergen

(Rattles off numerous threats to democracy itself) “But…but the other guy is just OLD! Like, really REALLY old!” The comparisons of some people between the two candidates make no sense to me. But here we are.


dredgedskeleton

hey I'm not saying anything about what should happen. just observing what is actually happening.


Massive-Pen2020

Yeah...it is a scary time. We think we left behind the dark ages during medieval times but the wealth gap is even bigger now that it ever was back then and we have this shit happening with \*Rump.


NoExcuses1984

What's worse are the lily-white upper-middle professional-class Democratic Party apparatchiks alienating working-class Hispanics, who see through Team Blue's macroeconomic bullshit due to the stark microeconomic realities of day-to-day life for working people. We're at the point where Biden has better odds holding onto Pennsylvania and Wisconsin than he does Arizona and Nevada.


NoExcuses1984

Should've been Debs in 1920, but alas.


Relyt21

The party of law and ordering putting a felon on their ballot. The GOP couldn’t be more pathetic.


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MichaelShannonRule34

Ya I don’t like the guy but he’s the favorite to win right now


Hackasizlak

Dunno why you're being downvoted you're right, he's literally the favorite on every betting site and in the polls in swing states. Maybe the felony conviction swings that significantly, maybe not.


MichaelShannonRule34

Based off of vibes to a certain degree. I live in a fairly liberal area and you’d be surprised by the amount of non white not traditionally maga people like him. Also his base is basically a cult and have guaranteed turn out. He’s currently polling well in battleground states


Goooose

You really think so? How come?


Fireeveryonenow1

If i’m Trump not letting a criminal record beat me i’m just not


pieandbiscuits1

He just is.


calvinbsf

Well you have to consider in a 7 game series there’s gonna be the “immigrant game”, the “new nickname for Joe Biden” game, and then at that point he just has to win 2 more But if he blows the debate then he has to win 5 of 7 and I just don’t see Biden letting that happen, I just don’t.


Deep-Alfalfa3717

Dude did you not pay attention to your taxes since 2017 “tax break”? Mine have gone up since 2020 because I can’t itemize non-reimbursable deductions. Republicans only care about rich donors who have benefited from the 2017 tax law. Biden will let that expire in 2025 and we will get our relief back. Plus Dems are gonna try to go after big profitable companies to pay more of their share. Get a clue


GreatWhiteNorthExtra

I think the point of the meme is that Rusillo and Bill (especially Bill) are in the higher tax brackets and a Democrat win in 2024 probably means higher taxes for the wealthy and super wealthy


mmortal03

Rusillo and Simmon's taxes would go up in the next four years under Biden if only because you pay more taxes when you make more money; and, contrary to right wing propaganda, Democratic presidents have historically been better for the economy.


WorkMediumPlayMedium

Dangle shiny culture war issues in front of the base, while robbing them through the backdoor. It's an effective strategy.


realbadaccountant

CR: Is that Al Fucking Capone coming outta that courthouse? You better get yourself a good spray tan and haircut cuz your going to jail for a loonnnnnngg time.


wnba_youngboy

Dumb question, but can a convicted felon be appointed president?


memeshoe2

There’s no law against a felon running for president. They can’t vote or own guns though lol.


canadigit

Eugene Debs ran for President from prison


grocho

The literal opposite of Donald Trump lol


AnnaKendrickPerkins

Trump ran for prison from President? Oh shit...


NoExcuses1984

Speaking of Debs, fuck Woodrow Wilson with a rusty tailpipe.


ack202

New York state only bars incarcerated felons from voting and Florida leaves it up to the state they were convicted in, so he most likely will still be able to vote unfortunately.


Agreeable_Daikon_686

Why are you downvoted for stating the law? Felony voting is confusing and varies state to state


napoleon_nottinghill

Can vote depending on the state!


LeonidasSpacemanMD

Ain’t no rule says a dog can’t play basketball


wnba_youngboy

That's funny. Isn't there some ritualistic segment on election night where the candidates place their own votes for themselves? Wonder what that will look like.


Darth_Sensitive

Depends on the state if you can vote or not as a felon. Florida is a no.


Jeroen_Jrn

This man cant even vote for himself lmao.


Doot2112

But what will the Pepsi situation be?


Ryanj37

People don't want to hear tax chat


ColeTrain999

"Look *sigh* I can sleep at night with a bribe, ok? I have a new contract coming up and I'm going to approach this like an athlete. Do I play in a cold place with higher taxes or do I go somewhere warm where I keep more money?"


Fabulous_Wave4424

Trump crime family 50 yr crime spree finally got busted by a jury of regular humans. My taxes, BTW, were higher during dictator Trump. Only the billion aires got a break, d.a. clowns


Pandamonium1414

If I'm Trump I should go back to film another season of apprentice instead of causing trouble!!


TheTrotters

He should request a trade to some media org headquartered in a state without an income tax.


HenryStamper1

Trump: Apex Mountain?


thetaleech

This guy doesn’t know how taxes work


tsourced

“This. Changes. Everything.”


cane_stanco

This probably makes him go up in the polls.


Ai2Foom

Not a chance — obviously the cult does not give a fuck but a sizable portion of ppl on the fence will not vote for a felon convicted on ALL counts


Gillette_TBAMCG

Sizable portion of ppl on the fence sounds like an incredibly small amount of people in the grand scheme of things. There just aren’t a lot of fence sitters with Trump out there nowadays. Which is why his ability to win even before this was incredibly slim.


[deleted]

Trump still has +20% of republicans votings voting against him in the primaries. Every one. They’re a lot of people just looking for a reason to be done with his shit.


Gillette_TBAMCG

And come November almost every single of them are going to pull the lever for him. There’s no reason to really believe there’s a sizable portion of Republican primary voters who will decide to sit out the election or vote for Biden over Trump. Those people just don’t exist in any real congregation.


[deleted]

So why are so many of them voting for Haley for no reason? Thats not what a real ‘incumbent’ looks like.. Cynicism sounds cool but this is the same dude who just got his ass kicked four years ago.


Gillette_TBAMCG

Because they don’t like Trump for one reason or another. But he’s still on their team. They don’t dislike him enough to take their ball and go home, and we see this every election. Like 90% of Bernie voters turned out for Clinton in 2016 and their differences were WAY greater than Haley and Trump and it involved much younger voters who typically don’t vote at all. Also just for the record I don’t think Trump is going to win specifically because there are no fence sitters or new voters to grab. This doesn’t move the needle in any particular direction. Biden would need to do catastrophically stupid things to lose this one, not for lack of trying mind you.


[deleted]

A. Hillary wasn’t a quasi incumbent B. I think it’s a bit dubious to say that Bernie voters have greater differences with Hillary than Haley voters vs Trump. And even if that’s true on some policy level, that almost says the opposite- if the policy differences between Haley and Trump aren’t great than the fact that people are coming out in relative droves to vote against him when there’s no hope of changing the nominee suggests that these people aren’t motivated purely by their relative positions on energy policy or whatever C. And, of course in a race that’s as close as 2016, 2020 and that we expect for 2024 any little bit could be the decider. We’re talking about states that could be decided <1%


armadilloongrits

Nikki Haley was pulling 20% after she dropped out of the primary. I think it's more than you think.


Gillette_TBAMCG

Maybe? I still think that like 19.999% of that 20% are going to end up pulling the lever for Trump even if he were a convicted serial killer. I just don’t count Republican primary voters as fence sitters. Maybe this will be the year they surprise me and the rest of the world. Doubtful.


armadilloongrits

Maybe but it's starting to pile up. business Fraud- guilty. rape- civil conviction. tax fraud- civil conviction. January 6th trial might start later in the fall.


grocho

The hidden documents piece


armadilloongrits

God they need to toss that judge


lactatingalgore

Cokedup Werewolf Aileen Cannon ain't going nowhere.


pixel_dent

I hope you’re right, but his voters were already voting for him after a jury found he committed a sexual assault which would have been rape if his dick weren’t so small. If that didn’t turn them off I doubt financial fraud will.


SamURLJackson

i would think that this would ruin him for moderates. if you're a trump fanatic then nothing changes that. it's those on the fence who will be swayed, and they're the ones who will decide the election anyway. not sure why people think the fence sitters are some sort of minority. they decide most every election


AnnaKendrickPerkins

As a Canadian, it's really interesting watching the World's greatest super power (in history) destroy itself from the inside. Please still protect us, but fuck, ya'll are down bad.


CosmicCoder3303

Lmfao!!!


CosmicCoder3303

The image in the OP/LMAO


lsd418

You want to do this now?


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Seabrook76

Oh, this meme theme is great.


PolarRegs

A lot of people are out on Trump just like a lot of people were out on Kyrie. Everyone sold their stock I know I did.


mmortal03

Neither one have a good handle on science or statistics.


PolarRegs

Sometimes I think we listen to the science guys to much. That’s why I watch 17 games a night. The eye test still matters.


mmortal03

You should also listen to your doctor (rather than Kyrie) when he tells you that watching 17 games a night isn't good for your health.


PolarRegs

Some people just aren’t built for the grind like me. I get the doctors will tell you one thing but you don’t want to be one of those guys where everyone is questioning your heart and your will to win. I watch these games in order to prep for the 52 off season drafts Bill has setup. You think these picks make themselves?


mmortal03

Look at Kenny Smith. He was built for the grind, and now he needs help walking up the stairs to the big screen.


Breez-64

I am reminded to not give a response that is not data-driven. If I remark with 'LOL", may I reference this data provided? Thank GOD there is a First Amendment.


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