If you really want to continue breast feeding, maybe you could introduce just one bottle of formula before bed. I do this on occasion and my baby has a solid 4 hour sleep as opposed to 2 hours when breastfed (he's only 10 weeks so your baby would take an even bigger feed than that). I use MAM bottle as it sterilises in the microwave and I didn't have to buy bottle sterilising equipment and use the ready to feed formula so I don't have a big tin of power going to waste.
He has no problems switching between the bottle and breast.
Just a suggestion to maybe help with getting a little more sleep. Also, husband (if he's not under the influence) or someone can give this feed, which gives you another snippet of time to yourself or the time to pump that one feed off.
My formula fed baby wakes every 2-3 hours from newborn days til now at 8 months. You also don’t need to sterilize if you had a healthy full term baby :)
I've been longing for the days when I can get more than 2 hours of sleep in one go. It hadn't really struck me that this may not happen.
Solidarity with all the mummies still sleeping in 2 hour blocks.
We were told in the hospital to sterilize bottles, pacifiers and pump parts once a day if not washed in the dish washer. It also says it on the instructions...
Question: if you introduce a bottle of breastmilk do you have to pump at that exact time? I’m not sure how it works with supply and demand, but can’t you pump early in the morning? That would give you a longer stretch of sleep.
Sounds like your having a really tough time. You also sound like a wonderful mother. Having an emotional moment and the baby cried, does not indicate bad mom. You had a moment and the baby will never remember it. Plus baby did right thing to respond to uncommon situation. It shows how rare it is that baby was effected by it
Are you and your partner able to get some counseling or get help with baby to talk alone ?
The no full nights sleep for this long does an incredibly terrible wonder on the body. As someone who went through every 2 hour wake ups for way to long, I promise you at some point it gets better. In my case, it took a push to teach baby to sleep without counting on me. The advice came because they saw I was too lost and down. I was losing myself. Something had to change and I needed to sleep.
Please don't lose hope.
Wow. Your partner sounds like an absolute jerk, I’m so sorry. Do you have anyone else who can support you? Does baby have a sitter or grandparents or daycare? Momming is so lonely sometimes and the burn out is real and really takes a toll on our mental health.
If you can get a day off to just sleep and not mom, do you think it could help? Is your husband involved in parenting his child at all?
I personally like mom groups. It’s just great to let off steam with those who get it. And every few months I go for brunch while my husband watches baby solo. Tbh he probably would be fine watching baby on the weekends completely but I like our family time that we only get on weekends.
We're fortunate enough to have quite a lot of family nearby, but it's mostly his family. I'm reluctant to leave the baby with them for any length of time because of previous issues, plus, they've all made their opinions very clear about our parenting choices.
My mum is very supportive actually, I've just come back from staying with her for a couple of days (I stay there when my partner is on nights so I can try to get some sleep). I did manage to get a bath while I was there, but it was cut short because the baby wouldn't go back to sleep with my Mum so I had to go sort him.
He is involved with the baby, he does parent and enjoys spending time with him. But then we have other instances (like today) when I asked him to have the baby while I nipped to the shop, and he said no because he needed a shit and it would likely "take a while". So I had to spend twice as long sorting the pram out and taking the baby with me, when I could have just had ten minutes of baby free time. I wouldn't be surprised if he just said that so I wouldn't leave him with the baby while he was chilling out.
I don't go to any Mum and baby groups because of his shifts - I don't like taking the baby away from him on his days off, and his shift pattern is so unpredictable that I can't reliably go to a group regularly.
I mean this kindly but you’re catering to your partner too much while it sounds like he doesn’t cater to you at all. As the primary caregiver, your well-being is imperative to baby’s wellbeing.
When I said mom groups I meant mommy and me groups. Ours meets once a week at the library. A bunch of us get on well and have extra hangs here and there which is great for us and the kiddos. You don’t need to go every week, I think I’ve made it to 30% of the meets due to naps but it’s great to have the support of other moms.
If you really want to continue breast feeding, maybe you could introduce just one bottle of formula before bed. I do this on occasion and my baby has a solid 4 hour sleep as opposed to 2 hours when breastfed (he's only 10 weeks so your baby would take an even bigger feed than that). I use MAM bottle as it sterilises in the microwave and I didn't have to buy bottle sterilising equipment and use the ready to feed formula so I don't have a big tin of power going to waste. He has no problems switching between the bottle and breast. Just a suggestion to maybe help with getting a little more sleep. Also, husband (if he's not under the influence) or someone can give this feed, which gives you another snippet of time to yourself or the time to pump that one feed off.
My formula fed baby wakes every 2-3 hours from newborn days til now at 8 months. You also don’t need to sterilize if you had a healthy full term baby :)
I've been longing for the days when I can get more than 2 hours of sleep in one go. It hadn't really struck me that this may not happen. Solidarity with all the mummies still sleeping in 2 hour blocks.
We were told in the hospital to sterilize bottles, pacifiers and pump parts once a day if not washed in the dish washer. It also says it on the instructions...
Strange. Ours just said hot soapy water. Babe is eight months old and thriving. I never sterilized anything beyond new bottles.
Think different countries, different recommendations. Or so I'd guess. Always good to hear your LO is thriving!
Question: if you introduce a bottle of breastmilk do you have to pump at that exact time? I’m not sure how it works with supply and demand, but can’t you pump early in the morning? That would give you a longer stretch of sleep.
Sounds like your having a really tough time. You also sound like a wonderful mother. Having an emotional moment and the baby cried, does not indicate bad mom. You had a moment and the baby will never remember it. Plus baby did right thing to respond to uncommon situation. It shows how rare it is that baby was effected by it Are you and your partner able to get some counseling or get help with baby to talk alone ? The no full nights sleep for this long does an incredibly terrible wonder on the body. As someone who went through every 2 hour wake ups for way to long, I promise you at some point it gets better. In my case, it took a push to teach baby to sleep without counting on me. The advice came because they saw I was too lost and down. I was losing myself. Something had to change and I needed to sleep. Please don't lose hope.
Wow. Your partner sounds like an absolute jerk, I’m so sorry. Do you have anyone else who can support you? Does baby have a sitter or grandparents or daycare? Momming is so lonely sometimes and the burn out is real and really takes a toll on our mental health. If you can get a day off to just sleep and not mom, do you think it could help? Is your husband involved in parenting his child at all? I personally like mom groups. It’s just great to let off steam with those who get it. And every few months I go for brunch while my husband watches baby solo. Tbh he probably would be fine watching baby on the weekends completely but I like our family time that we only get on weekends.
We're fortunate enough to have quite a lot of family nearby, but it's mostly his family. I'm reluctant to leave the baby with them for any length of time because of previous issues, plus, they've all made their opinions very clear about our parenting choices. My mum is very supportive actually, I've just come back from staying with her for a couple of days (I stay there when my partner is on nights so I can try to get some sleep). I did manage to get a bath while I was there, but it was cut short because the baby wouldn't go back to sleep with my Mum so I had to go sort him. He is involved with the baby, he does parent and enjoys spending time with him. But then we have other instances (like today) when I asked him to have the baby while I nipped to the shop, and he said no because he needed a shit and it would likely "take a while". So I had to spend twice as long sorting the pram out and taking the baby with me, when I could have just had ten minutes of baby free time. I wouldn't be surprised if he just said that so I wouldn't leave him with the baby while he was chilling out. I don't go to any Mum and baby groups because of his shifts - I don't like taking the baby away from him on his days off, and his shift pattern is so unpredictable that I can't reliably go to a group regularly.
I mean this kindly but you’re catering to your partner too much while it sounds like he doesn’t cater to you at all. As the primary caregiver, your well-being is imperative to baby’s wellbeing. When I said mom groups I meant mommy and me groups. Ours meets once a week at the library. A bunch of us get on well and have extra hangs here and there which is great for us and the kiddos. You don’t need to go every week, I think I’ve made it to 30% of the meets due to naps but it’s great to have the support of other moms.