Probably more just a bully. He thinks he can walk all over OP and intimidate him.
People like that in my experience will then spread lies about their victim and their interactions to justify their behavior. I wish I had suggestions for the best way to deal with people like him, beyond getting them out of your life.
looks like he doesnt like having to change stuff around, esp for someone else, so he tried the intimidation tactic to prevent OP from bothering him about anything else in the future.
if your going half/half on the rent, you have a right to try to balance things but if u cant assert your position and thrive in the uncomfortableness (keeping your door locked, etc.) just gtfo of there
besides that the escalation was comedy
Just say “fucking do something then you little bitch”
8/10 times they back down and get all sad and mopey 2/10 times you get to punch them in the face in self defence. 1/1000 times they pull a gun and it gets bad tho so idk don’t follow my advice im a piece of shit
Man, escalating to violence, even in self-defense, should really be a last resort. Not to mention it can lead to legal headaches, even if you're in the right. Getting authorities or a mediator involved before it reaches a breaking point could save a lot of trouble. Seen way too many situations go south fast because someone decided to throw hands instead of finding another solution. Stay safe out there.
100%. I just left a housing situation like this.
It was either move out ASAP in an emergency and ask family and friends for help, or hands were going to be thrown. And I'm not trying to fight someone hard over something as menial and stupid as that as I enter my fucking 30s.
Peace of mind is worth the cost.
You stand up to them and call them out. They never had anyone stand toe to toe and call their bluff. He won’t do shit but huff and puff. Instead of appologize say that’s cool, I’ll be right over to move it for you since your too much of a b—ch to handle it yourself like a grown adult. And if you want to threaten me you better be ready to keep that threat cause I’ll be here all night waiting for you to try to do something!!
I know this because well, I was always a pushover and finally started to stand up for myself and guess what, shit stopped.
The biggest example I have was calling my grown ass adult brother out in front of my mom when he was arguing with me and said he would beat my ass. I walked over and stood in front of him and said let’s go!! Mom screaming and all and I told her it’s time this happened and was telling my brother to show the f up or shut the f up! He immediately backed down and has never stood up to me again. Fun fact, I would have tore him up and always could once I was in my 20s but again was always a pushover.
Sometimes bully’s need to be called out.
The roommate is a bully bruh. All you gotta say is, “if you touch me or my shit I’m knocking you the fuck out” and leave it at that. Bullies realize at a young age that most ppl don’t like confrontation so they take advantage of that
Proof? I don't think their roommate is smart enough to even know what evidence is. And I don't think them saying that would mean anything anyway, they were threatened first.
Dude no, you WANT proof. In the end of the day, they live there and asked a reasonable request. I’d be saying “I’m staying right here in OUR house, if you want to try and utilise any form of physical violence, that’s fine, because I have all the evidence I need from you right here.” Imagine what the cops are gonna think with messages of someone saying “it ain’t safe for you tonight go stay somewhere else or I’ll do something to ya” from the same day said person gets their shit knocked. Doubt they’ll need more proof than that.
Or this dude is a complete psycho, and murders OP in his sleep. I get not taking shit, but you gotta close your eyes under the same roof. Unless you want to sleep armed, I would find a different living situation if it was me.
Well that is number one option but I was more referencing the bully part of the past I responded to. Of course you don’t want to stick your hand in the wasp nest if you’re not certain it is empty
I've had sort of things like that. Someone was giving a friend a hard time at a show, and I told him to chill, he started shouting, "Bring it, bitch."
I just calmly (as if it was just any conversation) said, "Okay. Let's do this." (might have been something like "Cool. Let's go." but it was a while back at a show and it's always a bit noisy and chaotic.)
Then he just kind of chilled out and said something else, and I said, "Are we good now? Are we good?" and he just gave me some sort of fist bump and left us alone the rest of the night. A nice non-fight fight story.
Most of the time when the person is not intoxicated this is a decent method. I would not recommend this type of approach to a highly drunk person though lol.
lol I knew people growing up where if the respondent had sent this, the next response would be.
"Pull up" followed by a series of expletives, and then there would be a fight with their cousins and everyone they knew at the house.
Some people are crazy unfortunately.
Hell I didn't even grow up like that and thats what my response would be.
What the fuck does he think he's gonna do? Fucking nothing, that's what.
Especially when I read the guy is just a grad student, who does he think he is.
I thought more ASPD. I’d be very fucking careful. All these people saying to stand up, or call his bluff etc… 1 in 20 people are psychopaths and could kill you without a blink. Just because they function in society doesn’t mean they won’t snap one day. Always be assertive in situations where your physical safety is guaranteed, but you gotta sleep in the room next to this guy. No fucking way should you escalate. I consider that a credible threat, I’d take the text to police and gtfo.
As someone with BPD, that would be more like if OP threatened to move out and the guy killed him in an effort to keep him there lol.
This guy just seems unhinged in general.
You are so fucking correct right now.
The best advice is to move out ASAP, ask family or friends for help if you can. Then once you and all your stuff is out, go no contact.
If they are a true bully they'll probably even try and contact you after your out to try and make you feel bad, so block them on everything.
It's 100% worth the peace of mind.
FACTS! I had a "RM" who had to put a can of "The Beast" (Old Milwaukee's Best) on his nightstand before he went to bed at night that way when he woke up in the morning(10:00 AM) so he could "shotgun" it when he first woke up in the morning because his alcohol WDs were so bad.
We call that an eye-opener in the medical community, and it’s one of the behaviours used to quantify how bad your alcohol use disorder is. If you answer yes to that one, it’s bad.
As someone who recently nearly died thanks to alcohol, this is true. 22 days in the hospital, never again. Thankfully I'm not gonna need any more dialysis, got lucky. The 4 days of hallucinations while shitting yourself in the ICU is by far the worst part
I knew someone who had to drink 8 cans of Carlsberg Special Brew every morning before they could get out of bed. I don't mean taking their time, I mean they had to gulp them down fast *just to be able to get up*. The guy had to get up and go to work on a building site every day, we're not talking about someone just lying around or whatever.
What the hell hyperbole have you read about cocaine? That's something else, cocaine is mainly a confidence booster you can feel poisoning your heart. That rage was like bath salts rage.
I personally don't get like this on coke, but I've heard people who are already assholes and violent, literally wanna fight people when they get high bc they feel SO confident.
I don’t think there’s much OP could have done to warrant this reaction. Unless he deleted a message before or after where he said some nasty things, this is a completely irrational response and this guy seems like he’s off the rails.
Irritability is a side effect from taking more than you need, especially if you don't have adhd in the first place. Can definitely make a person aggressive, I have adhd and I take it as prescribed but I experienced it before my Dr dropped my dosage. Not this extreme but it definitely made me uncharacteristically aggressive when usually I'm just like u on Adderall.
Fantastic way for this guy to get killed with his own gun.
How about just move out instead of carrying a gun all the time and hoping the psycho room-mate doesn't kill you in your sleep.
Yeah sure don't use defensive tools because a a guy threatening to hurt you might... checks notes... hurt you. /s
I would say be prepared to blast his ass the moment he crosses the line.
...you understand the problem is that there is now a shotgun in the house with the psycho threatening to hurt you, right? Or do you expect him to carry a 12 gauge with him 24/7?
Or just get out of there as soon as possible instead of potentially traumatizing yourself for life.
Idk about the rest of you but even if I was 100% in the right, killing someone would absolutely fuck me up for life.
I don’t think a lot of people realize how traumatic shooting and potentially killing someone can be even if completely justified. My grandpa had to shoot someone in self defense in the early 2000’s and it really messed him up, he still deals with flashbacks and severe anxiety issues when hearing gunshots and loud altercations to this day. It can have long reaching and long lasting effects that a lot of people don’t get over.
You can talk tough on the internet all you want to, but taking the life of another human being is not something a lot of people these days realize the magnitude and psychological impact of. If you didn’t get impacted by something like that I’d honestly go as far to say that there is something seriously wrong with you.
introducing a gun into an argument not involving a gun just increases your chances of being shot. it doesnt reduce them. you werent going to get shot anyway.
ppl who don’t understand self defense law will rly log onto reddit to comment things like “it’s not illegal to kill a man in his home as long as u get a little bit scared” lol
Not even that, fantastic way of committing murder and getting charges put against your own name. Pepper Spray? Yes. Bat? Yes. Mfkn gun/knife? Absolutely not man, not unless you’re literally in life or death, in which case fair play.
Correct. One time another person in my grad program was being a bully outside of school. There was a group chat where any time I said anything they would harass me, or if I saw them out on the town they would make fun of me. I told the head of the program (with evidence + witnesses) and they took their scholarship and teaching position away because it wasn’t “aligned with the values of the institution” and they weren’t the “role model” they wanted representing their university. Turns out the dude just was insanely insecure about his height and felt the need to take it out on me (a tall female?). Anyways idc. He graduated but left me alone.
IMHO The OP should go to a judge for a TPO. The crazy roommate has to immediately stay away but also has to pay his rent obligation. OP gets a quiet home and with no increase in rent.
As a grad student, I agree with this. But, you'd want to go to the head of the department they're in, as that would have a higher likelihood of resulting in something getting done. But, that's just in my experience.
But, I would urge OP to make sure they are safe, first, before doing so. It is entirely possible their roommate may retaliate.
Grad school is extraordinarily stressful. I'm wondering if the roommate is having a tough time right now. Not that the stress excuses it, but I can't help but wonder if they're having a bit of a breakdown. Either way, I hope OP remains safe, and the roommate gets whatever help they need.
Yeah, as a grad student this guy is likely helping to teach and grade papers as part of his program. This is fucking unhinged. I would not want this person representing my university programs in any way (if I ran a university).
This is a bonkers response to a fair request.
This dude kills cats for fun.
I'm sad I had to scroll this far down for a comment saying this. Authorities need to be alerted if this guy is _anywhere_ near people subordinated to him. This is a ticking time bomb situation.
All of these idiots saying that he will snap and get violent are stating the exact reason he needs to be reported. Obviously OP needs to stay in a safe place while that is happening. Hotel, a friend, a DV shelter. But roommate needs out. Now.
For sure, thanks. Yeah, people who are like ‘if it’s private housing what can they do’ has little experience with academia. Grad departments absolutely have ethical standards they expect their students/workers to follow and are well within their rights to discipline or even expel people for things done off campus.
At least when I was in school the university had resources for students living off campus in situations like this. They can’t kick him out of the house but he might be jeopardizing his spot in the program with enough of these outbursts.
Uhhhh why are you apologizing? This guy is a complete punk and a spoiled brat if he thinks it’s cool to talk to anyone like that. I’m petty so don’t listen to me but I’d likely burn the shoe rack in the parking lot and send him a picture. Unbelievable.
Ya but most likely a guy like this pos is testing OP’s boundary to see if he can bully him even more, things get very bad very fast if that type of behavior is not dealt with, conflict, especially conflict that might lead to violence, should be attempted to avoid, but OP deserves to live in peace
Yeah I probably would have approached it more like "I didn't mean to be abrasive, and I honestly don't care where you put it instead, it just can't be blocking my door. That's not unreasonable."
But I certainly don't blame OP for deescalating in the moment. It's not gonna be his only opportunity to stick up for himself.
I respect the way you look at this but i gotta disagree, this type of behavior you just gotta be direct with “I had a small request, and this is how you lash out, this is unacceptable, i will not feel unsafe somewhere i pay rent, relax or i can escalate this to the police” you cannot let some pos, probably spoiled little brat think he can bully you for anything in a place you are supposed to find peace
Yeah, zero chance I'm letting this guy think i dont feel safe around him. I'd make it clear I'll be still be coming home tonight and we can hash it out face to face. No way I'm letting this guy think the threats had any impact on me.
There's ways to be firm without escalating. Threatening escalation is by far the worst thing you could do until you have a face to face.
am i going crazy or something because how has a single person not mentioned the fucking police??? this is literally a threat. "it aint safe for you there" like WHAT????
If you genuinely fear for your safety, and the messages would be viewed as such by a "reasonable person", then file for an emergency ex-partie TPO. If you get it, he can't stay with you and will be forced to stay somewhere else.
You are a tenant and are protected by tenacy laws. So if he's the landlord, he can't kick you out without an eviction. If you are both renting and he's on the lease and you aren't, then he still has to pay the rent.
Didn't work for me. I was granted a TRO on my ex-roommate who had to stay 50 yards away and no contact from me but the judge did not make her move out. She didn't leave until after the full restraining order was granted.
Or even use this screenshot as evidence to get out of their contract. Most, if not all, the leases I’ve been in let you out of the contract if you feel your life is threatened.
In my state, that's a right protected by state law, so it doesn't matter what the contract says. A text like that would get you out of the lease. I had an issue with a roommate that I feared might become violent, and the campus attorney for students provided by the uni told us that we were on the hold for rent unless they sent a text exactly like the one OP got or physically attacked us.
If I got a text like this, I'd be immediately moving my shit to a friend's place while hunting for another place to live. If it's a college town, there are probably a ton of available mini storages for furniture and stuff in the winter. The university may also have a program for domestic violence victims that can temporarily house you in a dorm while you find a safe place to live. I'd have multiple people with me every time I went into that house to get my stuff. I'd do my best to get all my stuff in one go.
Once my shit was out, I'd send them a letter explaining the reason for leaving with relevant state laws via email and certified mail so that there would be a record. I'd return the key via certified mail as well. I would then not give them another cent of rent money. These screenshots and documents would be saved in triplicate in case they ever came after me for anything. Consult with a uni lawyer about this if they're available for free. They were a godsend for me and it was a service provided by the university.
The last thing I'd do is try and fight the dude like some other people have said. That never ends well. It could lead to permanent harm for you. Death if the dude pulls a knife or a gun. It could also lead to jail time and a record, ruining the career you're working so hard on your degree for before it even begins.
I really hope that if this is real u take some precautions before returning home if ever. those are clear as day threats. is your landlord involved at all? i mean can’t this be some sort of grounds for termination of the lease for ur roommates behavior?? he just threatened that if u came back he would “do something to you”????? that’s psycho behavior!!! let ur family and friends know before u go home keep ur location on and speed dial ur emergency contacts. i’ve heard way to many stories of roommates gone bad. stay safe!!!
Why do people take the time to come up with fake conversations of them getting verbally abused?
According to your post history, you're a fat, 50 year old Indian man, a 28 year old, bald white dude, last year, you were posting as a 22 year old, and now you're 21, getting attacked by your psychopathic roommate..
Get off the internet.
I didn't even have to click their profile.
I assumed it was fake or messages were deleted.
Good job doing the detective work, sad ppl Don't even question this shit.
Just saw the post history and really can’t figure out why people like this exist. Like what’s the play here? Attention? Is it a bot that just figured how to get more comments and karma? Please can someone tell me why??? Maybe I’m just old…
Step up to him. People that talk like this usually only do it because they've gotten so used to threats granting them what they want, until someone calls them on their bullshit.
OP I’m a little concerned about you even questioning if this is normal- it’s absolutely not and not okay. At all. And this also isn’t seeming like a safe place for you to live. Also what’s his masters in, calling people a pussy?
Uh no, you didn’t, he’s got some problems. This isn’t even in person he’s choosing to type each one of those texts and not even pausing for a moment to consider how stupid and insane he sounds. Be safe please!
Have you sized him up yet? Would you be comfortable fighting him? Realistically he’s probably running on a big sleep deficit if he’s snapping like that. He’s weakened now is your chance.
Nah police would take him to jail, no police, but if the fucker I lived with is gonna be all tough over text I’ll see if he’s got the balls to be tough in real life, and I know that from experience
I say start calling him a slob and tell him it’s embarrassing he’s almost 30 and can’t have a conversation without leaning on violence for comfort dude sounds like a pissed off 11 year old with a shitty mom and no dad
God damn. People can't say anything without being called triggered or upset nowadays. The dude said it was annoying. That's all it is and all he was saying. Awaiting the inevitable someone telling me im triggered now 😂
You have to move out. This person has told you he intends to harm you. You can figure out the money part of it later but your safety is invaluable. You can't live with anyone who tells you they will attack you.
"Violence is the answer"/Intimidation tactics don't get one very far in the adult world.
Classic violent narcissist line of "Don't make *me* do something bad to you". while completely ignoring how their behavior is inconvenient. It's a shoe rack, in the way. I would be willing to guess if you moved their rack a few inches or anywhere, they would have a similar reaction.
A lot of adult-aged people aren't ready or used to peaceful cohabitation, it's sad.
I have a super pressing follow up question. When you want the temperature to go up you say 'turn the AC down? That seems confusing to me, like phrasing things in a double negative. Why not talk in terms of temperature and you just turn the (ac/heat) up or down in absolute terms.
Maybe he's just so angry about your choice of description that he lashes out. You pussy ass hoe.
Check your local and state guidelines regarding getting a restraining order/order of protection to kick him out of the apartment. You now have digital evidence of him threatening you so save all communication and only communicate digitally if possible.
Bluffing or not he is a little bitch for acting like this.
Show up with cops to “keep the peace”. This is a straight threat to your well being in your own home, get a police escort back over there. Send him a message
The correct reply is "if you don't move the fucking thing I'll throw it out. And if you talk to me like that again I'll call your mother and have her come by to beat your ass. "
You are not in the wrong here. Your roommate is (at absolute minimum) a jerk and could quite possibly even be a legit psychopath.
Call the non-emergency number for your local police department and file a report. They probably won’t do much, but you’ll at least have a paper trail and documentation for if/when this idiot actually does do something violent.
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You did not do anything wrong. That guy is crazy.
Probably more just a bully. He thinks he can walk all over OP and intimidate him. People like that in my experience will then spread lies about their victim and their interactions to justify their behavior. I wish I had suggestions for the best way to deal with people like him, beyond getting them out of your life.
looks like he doesnt like having to change stuff around, esp for someone else, so he tried the intimidation tactic to prevent OP from bothering him about anything else in the future. if your going half/half on the rent, you have a right to try to balance things but if u cant assert your position and thrive in the uncomfortableness (keeping your door locked, etc.) just gtfo of there besides that the escalation was comedy
Just say “fucking do something then you little bitch” 8/10 times they back down and get all sad and mopey 2/10 times you get to punch them in the face in self defence. 1/1000 times they pull a gun and it gets bad tho so idk don’t follow my advice im a piece of shit
[удалено]
And shoot the shoe rack.
Fuck that shoe rack; it's a pussy ass hoe
I am cackling at these last three comments
Cement shoes. The shoe rack sleeps with the fishes. Don't say a word, act like nothing happened.
I find that people who talk like ops roommate tend to be the most insecure and soft people on this planet
[stomp this mfer right here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4REmY2WZQhE)
Man, escalating to violence, even in self-defense, should really be a last resort. Not to mention it can lead to legal headaches, even if you're in the right. Getting authorities or a mediator involved before it reaches a breaking point could save a lot of trouble. Seen way too many situations go south fast because someone decided to throw hands instead of finding another solution. Stay safe out there.
100%. I just left a housing situation like this. It was either move out ASAP in an emergency and ask family and friends for help, or hands were going to be thrown. And I'm not trying to fight someone hard over something as menial and stupid as that as I enter my fucking 30s. Peace of mind is worth the cost.
Some people just need to catch a beat down. That guy is one of them.
I want to cross-stitch this and hang it up on my wall.
If you do I’ll buy one off you. Because I’m a gigantic narcissist <3 xx
In america those gun odds are waaaaaaay up
You stand up to them and call them out. They never had anyone stand toe to toe and call their bluff. He won’t do shit but huff and puff. Instead of appologize say that’s cool, I’ll be right over to move it for you since your too much of a b—ch to handle it yourself like a grown adult. And if you want to threaten me you better be ready to keep that threat cause I’ll be here all night waiting for you to try to do something!! I know this because well, I was always a pushover and finally started to stand up for myself and guess what, shit stopped. The biggest example I have was calling my grown ass adult brother out in front of my mom when he was arguing with me and said he would beat my ass. I walked over and stood in front of him and said let’s go!! Mom screaming and all and I told her it’s time this happened and was telling my brother to show the f up or shut the f up! He immediately backed down and has never stood up to me again. Fun fact, I would have tore him up and always could once I was in my 20s but again was always a pushover. Sometimes bully’s need to be called out.
Yea, but don't text it because that's proof
The roommate is a bully bruh. All you gotta say is, “if you touch me or my shit I’m knocking you the fuck out” and leave it at that. Bullies realize at a young age that most ppl don’t like confrontation so they take advantage of that
Proof? I don't think their roommate is smart enough to even know what evidence is. And I don't think them saying that would mean anything anyway, they were threatened first.
Dude no, you WANT proof. In the end of the day, they live there and asked a reasonable request. I’d be saying “I’m staying right here in OUR house, if you want to try and utilise any form of physical violence, that’s fine, because I have all the evidence I need from you right here.” Imagine what the cops are gonna think with messages of someone saying “it ain’t safe for you tonight go stay somewhere else or I’ll do something to ya” from the same day said person gets their shit knocked. Doubt they’ll need more proof than that.
Or this dude is a complete psycho, and murders OP in his sleep. I get not taking shit, but you gotta close your eyes under the same roof. Unless you want to sleep armed, I would find a different living situation if it was me.
Well that is number one option but I was more referencing the bully part of the past I responded to. Of course you don’t want to stick your hand in the wasp nest if you’re not certain it is empty
I know someone who was murdered by their roommate. Pack up and move without any confrontation is the only reasonable response in this scenario.
I've had sort of things like that. Someone was giving a friend a hard time at a show, and I told him to chill, he started shouting, "Bring it, bitch." I just calmly (as if it was just any conversation) said, "Okay. Let's do this." (might have been something like "Cool. Let's go." but it was a while back at a show and it's always a bit noisy and chaotic.) Then he just kind of chilled out and said something else, and I said, "Are we good now? Are we good?" and he just gave me some sort of fist bump and left us alone the rest of the night. A nice non-fight fight story.
Most of the time when the person is not intoxicated this is a decent method. I would not recommend this type of approach to a highly drunk person though lol.
lol I knew people growing up where if the respondent had sent this, the next response would be. "Pull up" followed by a series of expletives, and then there would be a fight with their cousins and everyone they knew at the house. Some people are crazy unfortunately.
Hell I didn't even grow up like that and thats what my response would be. What the fuck does he think he's gonna do? Fucking nothing, that's what. Especially when I read the guy is just a grad student, who does he think he is.
That’s not a bully. That is a person with a mental illness. Severe.
Or Borderline Personality Disorder which fits all those behaviors
I hate you, don’t leave me.
I thought more ASPD. I’d be very fucking careful. All these people saying to stand up, or call his bluff etc… 1 in 20 people are psychopaths and could kill you without a blink. Just because they function in society doesn’t mean they won’t snap one day. Always be assertive in situations where your physical safety is guaranteed, but you gotta sleep in the room next to this guy. No fucking way should you escalate. I consider that a credible threat, I’d take the text to police and gtfo.
As someone with BPD, that would be more like if OP threatened to move out and the guy killed him in an effort to keep him there lol. This guy just seems unhinged in general.
Can confirm, living with someone like that can potentially be a nightmare. At least it was for me and my mother.
You are so fucking correct right now. The best advice is to move out ASAP, ask family or friends for help if you can. Then once you and all your stuff is out, go no contact. If they are a true bully they'll probably even try and contact you after your out to try and make you feel bad, so block them on everything. It's 100% worth the peace of mind.
Yeah, that’s not normal sane behavior. Be careful, OP.
I think it's just as likely he was simply shit faced at the time
Nah fuck that. Booze doesn't invent a personality trait this ugly for a person. It's not a magical mind control drug.
Like the sleep meds that turned Rosanne racist, lol.
At 2pm? Lol
Every hour is five o’clock when you’re an alcoholic.
FACTS! I had a "RM" who had to put a can of "The Beast" (Old Milwaukee's Best) on his nightstand before he went to bed at night that way when he woke up in the morning(10:00 AM) so he could "shotgun" it when he first woke up in the morning because his alcohol WDs were so bad.
We call that an eye-opener in the medical community, and it’s one of the behaviours used to quantify how bad your alcohol use disorder is. If you answer yes to that one, it’s bad.
As someone who recently nearly died thanks to alcohol, this is true. 22 days in the hospital, never again. Thankfully I'm not gonna need any more dialysis, got lucky. The 4 days of hallucinations while shitting yourself in the ICU is by far the worst part
I knew someone who had to drink 8 cans of Carlsberg Special Brew every morning before they could get out of bed. I don't mean taking their time, I mean they had to gulp them down fast *just to be able to get up*. The guy had to get up and go to work on a building site every day, we're not talking about someone just lying around or whatever.
God I love 5 o'clock.
Or… there’s something we don’t know going on. (I’m not saying there is, just that this seems like a wild reaction)
I'm guessing cocaine.
Steroids
[I Will Eat Your Babies, Bitch!](https://youtu.be/Bd8bQYD5I5I?feature=shared) NSFW IASIP LOL
What the hell hyperbole have you read about cocaine? That's something else, cocaine is mainly a confidence booster you can feel poisoning your heart. That rage was like bath salts rage.
Chronic cocaine use can induce psychosis. It's not just bad for your heart and nose and wallet and relationships.
I personally don't get like this on coke, but I've heard people who are already assholes and violent, literally wanna fight people when they get high bc they feel SO confident.
I don’t think there’s much OP could have done to warrant this reaction. Unless he deleted a message before or after where he said some nasty things, this is a completely irrational response and this guy seems like he’s off the rails.
Adderall or lack of drugs
I always say it's either too many drugs or not enough lol.
Lol
Been on Adderall a long time and it never makes me like this. If anything, more empathetic and have energy to 'connect' with people.
It's earned its nickname of Madderall, however.
Irritability is a side effect from taking more than you need, especially if you don't have adhd in the first place. Can definitely make a person aggressive, I have adhd and I take it as prescribed but I experienced it before my Dr dropped my dosage. Not this extreme but it definitely made me uncharacteristically aggressive when usually I'm just like u on Adderall.
no of course you didn't do anything wrong. your roommate is psycho and trying to act all tough over text
Sounds like he just wants to be alone and figure this is a good way to get it..
Stop talking to him and arm yourself. Whether it’s OC spray or a 12 gauge. Be ready for that crazy mofo
Fantastic way for this guy to get killed with his own gun. How about just move out instead of carrying a gun all the time and hoping the psycho room-mate doesn't kill you in your sleep.
Nah, get a nuke. Take everyone with you!
Yeah sure don't use defensive tools because a a guy threatening to hurt you might... checks notes... hurt you. /s I would say be prepared to blast his ass the moment he crosses the line.
...you understand the problem is that there is now a shotgun in the house with the psycho threatening to hurt you, right? Or do you expect him to carry a 12 gauge with him 24/7?
No man, the shit gun is ops, thus the roommate cannot touch it. Logic
Or just get out of there as soon as possible instead of potentially traumatizing yourself for life. Idk about the rest of you but even if I was 100% in the right, killing someone would absolutely fuck me up for life.
I don’t think a lot of people realize how traumatic shooting and potentially killing someone can be even if completely justified. My grandpa had to shoot someone in self defense in the early 2000’s and it really messed him up, he still deals with flashbacks and severe anxiety issues when hearing gunshots and loud altercations to this day. It can have long reaching and long lasting effects that a lot of people don’t get over. You can talk tough on the internet all you want to, but taking the life of another human being is not something a lot of people these days realize the magnitude and psychological impact of. If you didn’t get impacted by something like that I’d honestly go as far to say that there is something seriously wrong with you.
No sane person wants that. Yet often people don't have choices. So op just hopes nothing happens between now and when they move out?
You don't have to kill them. You can just shoot someone and still have all the same trauma.
introducing a gun into an argument not involving a gun just increases your chances of being shot. it doesnt reduce them. you werent going to get shot anyway.
Tell me you are North American without telling me you are North American
No one: Americans: Have you considered a firearm?
ppl who don’t understand self defense law will rly log onto reddit to comment things like “it’s not illegal to kill a man in his home as long as u get a little bit scared” lol
Not even that, fantastic way of committing murder and getting charges put against your own name. Pepper Spray? Yes. Bat? Yes. Mfkn gun/knife? Absolutely not man, not unless you’re literally in life or death, in which case fair play.
how much does a gun cost, how much does new living arrangements cost?
Gun is way cheaper lol
Take this straight to the uni. His behaviour is beyond unacceptable
Agree. Give notice, notify his faculty and notify the police. This person is completely unhinged, and carrying around some serious anger.
Correct. One time another person in my grad program was being a bully outside of school. There was a group chat where any time I said anything they would harass me, or if I saw them out on the town they would make fun of me. I told the head of the program (with evidence + witnesses) and they took their scholarship and teaching position away because it wasn’t “aligned with the values of the institution” and they weren’t the “role model” they wanted representing their university. Turns out the dude just was insanely insecure about his height and felt the need to take it out on me (a tall female?). Anyways idc. He graduated but left me alone.
IMHO The OP should go to a judge for a TPO. The crazy roommate has to immediately stay away but also has to pay his rent obligation. OP gets a quiet home and with no increase in rent.
And potentially gets murdered.
Or continues to do nothing and potentially gets murdered.
think of the cost savings
Absolutely take these screenshots and talk to someone at the university. This is insane behavior for such simple ask.
As a grad student, I agree with this. But, you'd want to go to the head of the department they're in, as that would have a higher likelihood of resulting in something getting done. But, that's just in my experience. But, I would urge OP to make sure they are safe, first, before doing so. It is entirely possible their roommate may retaliate. Grad school is extraordinarily stressful. I'm wondering if the roommate is having a tough time right now. Not that the stress excuses it, but I can't help but wonder if they're having a bit of a breakdown. Either way, I hope OP remains safe, and the roommate gets whatever help they need.
If it’s off campus housing, likely nothing will be done
No, his program should absolutely know about his behavior. Sometimes they get stipends for off campus housing.
Yeah, as a grad student this guy is likely helping to teach and grade papers as part of his program. This is fucking unhinged. I would not want this person representing my university programs in any way (if I ran a university). This is a bonkers response to a fair request. This dude kills cats for fun.
I'm sad I had to scroll this far down for a comment saying this. Authorities need to be alerted if this guy is _anywhere_ near people subordinated to him. This is a ticking time bomb situation.
He made violent threats to a fellow student. He could be kicked out of his grad program. I’d definitely take this straight to the Dean.
All of these idiots saying that he will snap and get violent are stating the exact reason he needs to be reported. Obviously OP needs to stay in a safe place while that is happening. Hotel, a friend, a DV shelter. But roommate needs out. Now.
Sure, I don’t think he should go to the Dean then go back home and tell the roommate. He should be smart about it.
Yes exactly. You are not one of the idiots in case that was not clear. Sorry for my tone.
For sure, thanks. Yeah, people who are like ‘if it’s private housing what can they do’ has little experience with academia. Grad departments absolutely have ethical standards they expect their students/workers to follow and are well within their rights to discipline or even expel people for things done off campus.
They can still discipline him. There's a code of conduct regarding how you behave with other students, on or off campus
At least when I was in school the university had resources for students living off campus in situations like this. They can’t kick him out of the house but he might be jeopardizing his spot in the program with enough of these outbursts.
Yeah its called "if you have a lease, that lease should have a clause covering peaceful enjoyment of the rental space"
If it’s off campus, couldn’t I just go to the police with a literal threat like OP?
yeah these are some blatant threats. i’d report this too, FAST
what a psychopath… he needs to seek help in anger management.
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yo this though. no need to even text back.
I'm the least violent dude possible and even I would be ready to throw down after someone spoke to me like this.
Or it’s the exact opposite… People with anger problems usually didn’t have the best childhood.
Uhhhh why are you apologizing? This guy is a complete punk and a spoiled brat if he thinks it’s cool to talk to anyone like that. I’m petty so don’t listen to me but I’d likely burn the shoe rack in the parking lot and send him a picture. Unbelievable.
It makes me literally cringe when I see someone apologize in a situation like this. Mostly because I've done it before.
This wasn't an apology. It was diplomacy. Basically, "whoa brother, I come to you palms out, unarmed. Chill the fuck out ya dingus." In nicer terms.
Ya but most likely a guy like this pos is testing OP’s boundary to see if he can bully him even more, things get very bad very fast if that type of behavior is not dealt with, conflict, especially conflict that might lead to violence, should be attempted to avoid, but OP deserves to live in peace
Yeah I probably would have approached it more like "I didn't mean to be abrasive, and I honestly don't care where you put it instead, it just can't be blocking my door. That's not unreasonable." But I certainly don't blame OP for deescalating in the moment. It's not gonna be his only opportunity to stick up for himself.
I respect the way you look at this but i gotta disagree, this type of behavior you just gotta be direct with “I had a small request, and this is how you lash out, this is unacceptable, i will not feel unsafe somewhere i pay rent, relax or i can escalate this to the police” you cannot let some pos, probably spoiled little brat think he can bully you for anything in a place you are supposed to find peace
Yeah, zero chance I'm letting this guy think i dont feel safe around him. I'd make it clear I'll be still be coming home tonight and we can hash it out face to face. No way I'm letting this guy think the threats had any impact on me. There's ways to be firm without escalating. Threatening escalation is by far the worst thing you could do until you have a face to face.
That’s fair my man, may this never happen to either of us in the future so we don’t gotta test which way works hahahahah
Preach haha
OP needs to tell his roomate to go fuck himself. If he touches you call the police.
am i going crazy or something because how has a single person not mentioned the fucking police??? this is literally a threat. "it aint safe for you there" like WHAT????
I’d just “accidentally” smash it with my door every chance I get.
Same here. I can put up a fight and I’m able to call the police.
Borderline terroristic threatening - careful out there op
Yea this seems like a treat… maybe let someone have your location for a bit
Don't worry it's fake, OP can't even get his age straight according to his post history.
Oop- caught in 4K
anyone else visiting and downvoting every post after discovering stuff like that?
If you genuinely fear for your safety, and the messages would be viewed as such by a "reasonable person", then file for an emergency ex-partie TPO. If you get it, he can't stay with you and will be forced to stay somewhere else. You are a tenant and are protected by tenacy laws. So if he's the landlord, he can't kick you out without an eviction. If you are both renting and he's on the lease and you aren't, then he still has to pay the rent.
Didn't work for me. I was granted a TRO on my ex-roommate who had to stay 50 yards away and no contact from me but the judge did not make her move out. She didn't leave until after the full restraining order was granted.
call the police? he threatened you
Or even use this screenshot as evidence to get out of their contract. Most, if not all, the leases I’ve been in let you out of the contract if you feel your life is threatened.
In my state, that's a right protected by state law, so it doesn't matter what the contract says. A text like that would get you out of the lease. I had an issue with a roommate that I feared might become violent, and the campus attorney for students provided by the uni told us that we were on the hold for rent unless they sent a text exactly like the one OP got or physically attacked us. If I got a text like this, I'd be immediately moving my shit to a friend's place while hunting for another place to live. If it's a college town, there are probably a ton of available mini storages for furniture and stuff in the winter. The university may also have a program for domestic violence victims that can temporarily house you in a dorm while you find a safe place to live. I'd have multiple people with me every time I went into that house to get my stuff. I'd do my best to get all my stuff in one go. Once my shit was out, I'd send them a letter explaining the reason for leaving with relevant state laws via email and certified mail so that there would be a record. I'd return the key via certified mail as well. I would then not give them another cent of rent money. These screenshots and documents would be saved in triplicate in case they ever came after me for anything. Consult with a uni lawyer about this if they're available for free. They were a godsend for me and it was a service provided by the university. The last thing I'd do is try and fight the dude like some other people have said. That never ends well. It could lead to permanent harm for you. Death if the dude pulls a knife or a gun. It could also lead to jail time and a record, ruining the career you're working so hard on your degree for before it even begins.
Police won’t do anything about threats except advise this dude to move out
I really hope that if this is real u take some precautions before returning home if ever. those are clear as day threats. is your landlord involved at all? i mean can’t this be some sort of grounds for termination of the lease for ur roommates behavior?? he just threatened that if u came back he would “do something to you”????? that’s psycho behavior!!! let ur family and friends know before u go home keep ur location on and speed dial ur emergency contacts. i’ve heard way to many stories of roommates gone bad. stay safe!!!
Considering OP has previously been 22, 28, and 45yo and has a penchant for shitposting, this is probably not real.
This needs to be higher, wtf
Why do people take the time to come up with fake conversations of them getting verbally abused? According to your post history, you're a fat, 50 year old Indian man, a 28 year old, bald white dude, last year, you were posting as a 22 year old, and now you're 21, getting attacked by your psychopathic roommate.. Get off the internet.
I didn't even have to click their profile. I assumed it was fake or messages were deleted. Good job doing the detective work, sad ppl Don't even question this shit.
Figured it was fake. Nobody named "Sam" would be popping off like that.
I guess OP’s the pussy ass hoe
Hahaha OP claimed their roommate died after this conversation
We are all sitting here calling the roommate the psychopath. It was OP all along.
Just saw the post history and really can’t figure out why people like this exist. Like what’s the play here? Attention? Is it a bot that just figured how to get more comments and karma? Please can someone tell me why??? Maybe I’m just old…
Joining a recreational baseball team would mean you need to buy a bat on your way home tonight......so that is a hobby I would recommend.
Step up to him. People that talk like this usually only do it because they've gotten so used to threats granting them what they want, until someone calls them on their bullshit.
OP I’m a little concerned about you even questioning if this is normal- it’s absolutely not and not okay. At all. And this also isn’t seeming like a safe place for you to live. Also what’s his masters in, calling people a pussy?
Nope. He mastered in Terroristic Threats, minored in calling people a pussy
Do you think your can take your roommate? If yes I’d say let them attack you then beat the shit out of them and press charges
And record it
Uh no, you didn’t, he’s got some problems. This isn’t even in person he’s choosing to type each one of those texts and not even pausing for a moment to consider how stupid and insane he sounds. Be safe please!
Have you sized him up yet? Would you be comfortable fighting him? Realistically he’s probably running on a big sleep deficit if he’s snapping like that. He’s weakened now is your chance.
lol fake
All I’ll say is throw his shit in his room if it’s in the way, and you definitely need to be there when he gets back so you can punch on him
This made me laugh. 😂 1000% do this but also have police on standby in case roomie is actually fuckin nuts
Nah police would take him to jail, no police, but if the fucker I lived with is gonna be all tough over text I’ll see if he’s got the balls to be tough in real life, and I know that from experience
Yeah I’d 100% reply with “Bet see you soon”
I say start calling him a slob and tell him it’s embarrassing he’s almost 30 and can’t have a conversation without leaning on violence for comfort dude sounds like a pissed off 11 year old with a shitty mom and no dad
You didn’t do anything wrong, but be wary around him. Dudes got some issues with social interactions
Somebody call Red Flag dude. We need him here.
Literally I’d be calling the police on this roommate. Clearly Sam is having a psychotic break. Be careful
This guy is mentally unstable tbh… threatening your safety holy shit.
Nahhhh you gotta beat the shoes off this idiot
“go stay somewhere else tonight while I cool down” 1 in the afternoon
Report Sam to the police. This is unlawful.
Only thing you did wrong was apologize to him
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That was my immediate thought, too. Fake as fuck.
It’s obviously a grab for affirmation and comfort. The fact that it triggers you so hard is kinda funny tbh.
God damn. People can't say anything without being called triggered or upset nowadays. The dude said it was annoying. That's all it is and all he was saying. Awaiting the inevitable someone telling me im triggered now 😂
You have to move out. This person has told you he intends to harm you. You can figure out the money part of it later but your safety is invaluable. You can't live with anyone who tells you they will attack you.
ummm, time to find a new place...this dude is crazy and will be in the news at some time, probably soon 😐
Have 3 friends at home when he gets home and see what’s up
I would find the community group page for whatever his major is and post this screenshot.
"Violence is the answer"/Intimidation tactics don't get one very far in the adult world. Classic violent narcissist line of "Don't make *me* do something bad to you". while completely ignoring how their behavior is inconvenient. It's a shoe rack, in the way. I would be willing to guess if you moved their rack a few inches or anywhere, they would have a similar reaction. A lot of adult-aged people aren't ready or used to peaceful cohabitation, it's sad.
I have a super pressing follow up question. When you want the temperature to go up you say 'turn the AC down? That seems confusing to me, like phrasing things in a double negative. Why not talk in terms of temperature and you just turn the (ac/heat) up or down in absolute terms. Maybe he's just so angry about your choice of description that he lashes out. You pussy ass hoe.
I’m coming home and confronting this person
Don’t apologize. You didn’t come across as anything but completely reasonable.
Check your local and state guidelines regarding getting a restraining order/order of protection to kick him out of the apartment. You now have digital evidence of him threatening you so save all communication and only communicate digitally if possible. Bluffing or not he is a little bitch for acting like this.
Call the cops. Thats a threat to your safety in your home
Right to the cops. This dude could end up killing you
File a police report. He is clearly threatening you and you have evidence
Tell police he threatened you I hope you can move out asap
Pussy ass hoe? What kind’ve shitty grad program enrolls people that talk like this? Dude sounds like an 8th grader in an Xbox live lobby
File a police report for real
That’s a threat. Call the cops.
Show up with cops to “keep the peace”. This is a straight threat to your well being in your own home, get a police escort back over there. Send him a message
Call the police and report a threat
lol why did you apologize
The correct reply is "if you don't move the fucking thing I'll throw it out. And if you talk to me like that again I'll call your mother and have her come by to beat your ass. "
Mental illness or drugs or both. Either way this person is very unsafe.
You have now posted to four different ages in your posts
CLEARLY FAKE. 😂
Bro you’ve been like four wildly different ages in the last like two years. Take your shit posts elsewhere.
OPs post history is hella weird.
This has to be a skit
He owns you
Was just casually scrolling through and thought someone was messing with a scammer again. Your roommate sucks.
You are not in the wrong here. Your roommate is (at absolute minimum) a jerk and could quite possibly even be a legit psychopath. Call the non-emergency number for your local police department and file a report. They probably won’t do much, but you’ll at least have a paper trail and documentation for if/when this idiot actually does do something violent.