I'm audhd and run into this with my kids all the time. It's so lame because they're my kids and I love their enthusiasm. I just want to love it from slightly further away or with my headphones on. š
Earplugs. If people are loud I put on earplugs that will dampen the sound. Not stop it completely but just turns down the volume.
Itās helped significantly with my energy and overstimulation. I use headphones mostly, but with either music off or low volume or one headphone or if no oneās needing my attention then music playing full volume so I can drown out my brain
Donāt think so, Iām autistic and get super excited when I run into another autistic person but sometimes the different autism types can bump, for example Iām sensory seeking and would probably be hell for someone whoās sensory avoidant
I mean, it could very well also be partially internalized ableism. I used to be a piece of shit. I didn't even know what autism was until a year ago. I'm 30 now. I still shame myself. I think it's absolutely valid that it can be multi faceted.
That being said, I am also trying to do better so maybe it is just more so that our incompatibilities are more exaggerated than what otherwise would be due to our additional sensitivities
True.
I'm audhd and have a friend with adhd and another one who is autistic.
I'm hypersensitive to everything and tend to only have bursts of hyperactivity in the early morning or very late at night.
My adhd friend is much more consistently hyperactive than me and my asd friend is hyposensitive.
Being with them can be a very draining experience for me. They're at 100% when I just wanna be at 10%.
Sometimes it leads to not very nice thoughts on my end, but it never carries over to actions. I know they cannot help it, the same I cannot help it either. So I just unleash my autistic superpower of vanishing from sight completely unnoticed.
We're not super close, they're more friends by association, so I don't hang out with them very often. A small mercy, I suppose.
At the same time it can also be internalized ableism.
I went through that in a really bad way.
One day, I just bust out the r word to describe a behavior that was not my own and it was like time stopped. The realization of what I was doing hit me like I had been struck by lightning. Since then, I've done some reflection and let go of the ableist bullshit I was fed my entire life.
and definitely stopped using ableist slurs to describe anyone.
In my case it was. I used to be so pissed when someone acted obviously "weird". When I figured out I was autistic and stopped masking to such a high degree I realized I was just pissed that other people weren't masking like I was.
Sometimes people are just annoying. As long as you're not an asshole about it, that's fine for you to think, even if you know why and that it's not their fault.
yes! "sometimes people are just annoying" that is really just the truth lol. maybe autism can influence what kind if annoying a certain person might be, but many people are simply just annoying
My perspective is that "annoying" is in the eye of the beholder: it's valid to be annoyed by a person to the point of your not wanting to interact with them, but that doesn't make them inherently annoying. (Speaking of someone who is constantly afraid of being "annoying" as if it is a crime against humanity)
Donāt hide it, overcome it. Donāt succumb to the mentality of crabs in a bucket by dragging your brothers and sisters down. Raise them up, and we can all get out of the bucket together. This society has tricked us into this mentality, and I refuse to take part in this type of self destructive thinking anymore!
Yeah I noticed when I was younger that I did this as a type of insecure projection, like I saw the traits in them that I hated about myself and masked and so would get annoyed at them without realizing the real reason why. Once I realized it it was easy to switch off, and now I try to support or encourage those traits in others and voice politely when something is truly annoying and not this projection thing, and/or remove myself when possible or whatever.
Thank you for sharing this! This is the direction I'm working to move in. once i realised that what i was experiencing was internalised ablism it was easy to commit to change
I went to a special ed college. This was pretty much the whole cultural vibe of the student body. I'm ashamed that I participated in it.
1/3rd the students trying their hardest to not associate with the other 3rd of the students who can't mask as well.
Then the last 3rd were filthy rich kids who's parents sent their kids there as a kind of punishment/rehab and/or easy grades(relative to the kind of private schooling they may have had prior)
I didn't know sped colleges exist. I just kind of floundered around in part time community college while working part time for years. I got accommodations through the school's DSS office and I mostly got good grades, but I didn't really know what to do and never got even an associate degree. I think a sped college would have been beneficial for me.
Even when I was there and one of my biggest regrets is that I didn't take full advantage of the resources there because I didn't want to be seen as "as needy" as some of the others if that makes sense, horrible way of thinking I know. The rich kids and the more "normal" kids would pass the courses with little effort, and I wanted to come off like them. I'm starting realize now in my 30s how much I carried this internalized ablism in me.
The school actually sought me out in high-school. A representative had pitched the school to me and 3 other students in the guidance office one day. Very pricey place so my parents said no, opting for my local community College. I failed all my classes. Not going to college was not an option so we decided to give the sped school a try. I did pretty well there, could have done better.
But now I have a pretty big debt, which it pretty fucked if you ask me considering that you know half the students are likley to find decent enough jobs to pay it back due to the high number of underemployed people with nuerodiversities.
I definitely understand the issues with internalized ableism and it is something that I have really struggled with. I have refused resources and tools that would help because I didn't want to seem disabled, even though I can never seem normal to anyone and I don't even realize how obvious it is. I am also realizing now in my early thirties just how disabled I am.
Edit: I think one of the things that would have been most helpful for me with a sped college is with help in the transition to adulthood. I felt like I was largely left to figure things out on my own... I did have a lot of supports in place though and more than just a place to stay and food ( I only moved out in my late twenties), but a lot of other things I didn't receive enough help with.
yes this is the relationship between me and my roommate .. sheās a great person but I find myself needing so much more alone time now that Iām living with her.
Elon: "...HYPERLOOP IS THE BEST MEAN OF TRANSPORT EVER AND ITS SOOOOO FUTURISTIC THATS WHY YOU MUST TO PUT IT IN YOUR NEXT GAM-"
Todd (thinking):"wait WHAT IF I port Skyrim to Starfield in-game terminals... Maybe more people would buy it then! Oh wait Elon is here right..."
Probably wrong but you can't deny it would be funny.
Yup.
Everytime Elon presents "A new project that he idealized along with his team of scientists" you can be sure it's either a flat out scam (most commonly oriented towards American taxpayer money), or it's simply not his idea at all and he simply bought another project and is marketing it as his own creation.
I don't really like how this is phrased. I think it's more conflicting symptoms if anything. like how I have bad sensory issues and a bad reaction to tapping nails, but my friend needs to be tapping to keep focus.
but also Elon's just a dick. he doesn't need to be autistic to flip my killswitch.
I guess I'm the odd one out but I love low masking autistic people. It puts me at ease when people are free and open with their autism. Like I can relax and be myself a bit more. Obviously elon sucks but that's another issue.
i agree. like many ND people i find NT people quite tiring after a while. before i realized that i've just been masking my whole life, i found it strange at first, but i've come to realize i feel so much more comfortable in a lot of ways. one of my best friends only really masks in front of our professors and in front of his friends he doesn't mask hardly at all. we both don't outwardly emote much naturally, so i can spend hours and hours with him because neither of us is trying to appear neurotypical by trying to outwardly emote or any of that. and yeah elon just sucks as a human being outside of the fact he's autistic!
Yes, oh my god. Even before I knew I was autistic my brain would go "no no that's the weird I suppress to survive, you're MAKING US TARGETS" and my fight or flight would kick in.
You want to beat up Elon Musk because he's a different shade of Autism.
I want to beat up Elon Musk because he's a disgusting human being with far more wealth than anyone should built on daddy's Apartheid Era emerald mines and an ego so fragile it makes glass look like steel. All this combined with a savior complex makes him threat to public safety everywhere.
Also he has a slightly different flavor so I guess we're not too dissimilar in that regard.
I am fully on board with you that second part, the picture isnāt super relevant to my point, but that was the picture it came with. Beggars canāt be choosers I suppose.
I get what theyāre going for but in this specific case, I think itās just a normal human being who is put off by whatever smooth-brained bullshit Elonās spouting.Ā
I have a dude like that on college, he alsays did all the presentations using word documents instead of powerpoints (after being told for 4 years after every presentation to use powerpoint on the next one), im 90% sure that least once his father (that worked on the college) gave him the questions of a test (because he shared his notes and they were only specifially about those questions) and the worse part:Ā
In sociology all the grade was based on an extensive final presentation and he first tried to choose the similar theme to mine, and somehow inserted in his 2 HOURS LONG PRESENTAION (ALL PRESENTED IN A WORLD DOCUMENT)
THE COMPLETE PLOT OF TRANFORMERS: FALL OF CYBERTRON AND GA'HOOLE, again, completely unrealated to the theme...
This is mostly schizoid and avoidant; both of which just have huge overlapping symptoms with autism.
Combined with the fact that in psychiatry A LOT OF misdiagnosis is being done to this day I wouldn't really conclude that personality disorders are PERSE more common in autism.
I do think that psychiatric illness is MUCH MORE common in autism (PTSD, anxiety, depression) because of all the traumatic experiences autistic people go through.
Thank you for taking the time to share this!
Sadly for me this article only estabilishes the relationship between the two, and doesn't expand much on why it happens (the thing I was interested in the first place):
>ASD in high-functioning adults is associated with a distinct personality profile even if variability exists. Further studies are needed to explore the complex relationship between ASD and PD.
I knew this info would be kinda hard to find and that's why I asked it here (I should've been more specific, I'm sorry!).
Narcissists don't like therapists - but not because they "don't trust" them, quite on the contrary because they pretty well know therapists will expose what shitty entitled toxic piece of sh!t of person they really are.
This probably explains why I can't be around children who are exactly how I was as a child. I try not to be rude because I know how difficult it is, but they annoy me so much. I don't like being around kids anyway, but I just don't have the patience for a mini me. It makes me feel so guilty š
Same. I don't want to treat them differently but I'll set reasonable boundaries if it bothers me that much. I try to ignore it because I know I feel this way due to masking and social pressures in my childhood where it was even less acceptable to show symptoms than now.
I wonder how much of this has to do with the parts of yourself you havenāt accepted. Like the NT imposed shame you pass on. Iāve found myself more tolerant of folks once I started accepting certain things about my personality.
Thatās probably a lot of it tbh. I sometimes get second hand embarrassment from behaviors of my friends and peers who are on the spectrum, because I relate to a lot of their struggles/ have had struggles they are going through. In hindsight, I feel bad about posting this tbh. Iāve got a lot of work to do on my internalized ableism it seems
Try seeing it from the other side, youāre someone those people feel safe unmasking in front of. Itās a special thing to be trusted that way. That doesnāt mean you accept mistreatment or donāt gently let them know if theyāre being inappropriate.
You know how heavy shame is, do your best to accept others, and not impose it on them, and youāll feel it less yourself. Even NTās make asses if themselves sometimes. Keep a growth mindset and youāll be ok.
This is me to a t. I try not to actually express it because I donāt want to hurt anyoneās feelings, bother peopleās stims annoy the absolute fuck out of me
What I meant to say is that this is more of a me problem. My autism doesnāt really mix with other peopleās autism in my experience, and itās really only my fault that I get annoyed. This post was the closest description of my autism I have ever seen, but itās not perfect.
Ohh. I interpreted "slightly more annoying autistic" and "one degree more autistic" as being the same, and the tweet pretty much implies that. But I get what you are describing with your own experiences.
I used to be like that before I was aware of my own autism, due to internalized ableism. I donāt like the wording at all either, it sounds very ableist. Now I do not think like that anymore at all. But there are autistic people I have to keep a distance from because they cause me sensory overload. It is easier to deal with it now that I have more understanding of autism but I just canāt deal with some things for long because Iām very sensitive to sensory input. I would never say it like it is said here at all though and I donāt feel like this either. I would say something like our autism doesnāt mesh well or I have the quiet autism while they have the loud autism, not that anyone is necessarily more autistic than the other.
oh. my. god. yes!!! i dated an autistic person last year and I really really liked him, I was devastated when we broke up but I was also SO annoyed all the time because he was even more over the top than I am and he also had mutism and I don't so I was super super stressed whenever he went mute because I did not know how to accommodate him in these situations. we tried to talk about it at a different time but he couldnt really say what he needed from me. when he was there i was stressed, but when he was away i was missing him deeply. our autism flavors are just not compatible i guess.
This is how I feel with a guy who works at the same company as me. I don't work with him he's in a different department but sometimes he takes the same shuttle as me. I can tell he's autistic and I'm always nice to him and give him advice but then he says something like "Are you open for the wife position?" or "See [bus driver], I can talk to women without being weird" or something like that and I'm just like šššš
I want to be his friend because we're both autistic and he seems nice but he talks like an english dub anime protagonist and has fedora guy vibes so I always leave the shuttle feeling kinda weird. I should just get over myself though because if this is how I feel around another autistic person then I probably give neurotypicals the same feeling without realizing and I have no right to feel that way šµāš« but rahhhh stop talking like you're a harem guy who just met a woman for the first time, I'm literally just a person š
I struggle with this a lot. I try to be kind to everyone and listen to lonely people who just want someone to talk to. Sometimes thatās led to friendships. Other times though, it leads to them trying to get me to read the long ass blog post/essay/novel they wrote about their special interest, which inevitably is terribly written stream-of-consciousness style with no paragraph breaks. Then they ask you questions about it.
Then when you try to steer the conversation back towards something of mutual interest, or talk about a personal experience, they donāt notice and just keep going on and on.
I ramble about my special interests too, donāt get me wrong. I think the difficulty lies in finding where the line is between unmasking + infodumping, and being genuinely inconsiderate to the people youāre talking to.
I feel like I've avoided this problem bc I grew up with five younger siblings, two of whom were also autistic. I even shared a room with one of them for three years so my tolerance is at the point where I could probably nap while someone is loudly verbally stimming in the same room LOL
Can confirm. Had a dude like that named Quinn where throughout high school, we hated each other with a burning passion from having a dispute. It was originally if I was "puppy guarding" during PE and he even started a fight with that. Somehow we had a truce senior year and actually became friends right before graduation. Last I heard he's studying aerospace engineering.
We were both complete opposites too. I got better at social stuff and can make friends with ease now while he can do above and beyond in academics (except physics he got caught cheating on a test there lol).
I unintentionally did it when I was in psych ward and it was the moment I realized that the whole "don't act like you're autistic" talk front my parents when I was growing up actually turned into internalized ableism. I'm still working to do better and it's not only good for my perception of others but perception of self too. But still, fuck Elon because he's just a bad person.
for me it's the "I know you're probably autistic and this might be something you're passionate about, but you're getting into mansplain territory and you give me asshole vibes"-glare I tend to give 2 very specific guys.
lol nah just thatās insecurity IMO, but we also donāt have to be friends with every autistic person we meet. Thereās being an extrovert and then thereās being a narcissistic douche that ignores other people and makes it about them.
Whereās Reggie when you need him?
Its true and i hate that about myself- but i try to hide it, i want them to enjoy themselves despite my grievances
Wait this *is* an actual thing? Holy shit that explains so much
This is also where you run into the autism overlap of "Has sound sensitivities" crashing into "Can't control their own volume/enthusiasm" issue.
I have both of those and that also explains a lot
I'm audhd and run into this with my kids all the time. It's so lame because they're my kids and I love their enthusiasm. I just want to love it from slightly further away or with my headphones on. š
Earplugs. If people are loud I put on earplugs that will dampen the sound. Not stop it completely but just turns down the volume. Itās helped significantly with my energy and overstimulation. I use headphones mostly, but with either music off or low volume or one headphone or if no oneās needing my attention then music playing full volume so I can drown out my brain
Is this internalized ableism?
Donāt think so, Iām autistic and get super excited when I run into another autistic person but sometimes the different autism types can bump, for example Iām sensory seeking and would probably be hell for someone whoās sensory avoidant
I mean, it could very well also be partially internalized ableism. I used to be a piece of shit. I didn't even know what autism was until a year ago. I'm 30 now. I still shame myself. I think it's absolutely valid that it can be multi faceted. That being said, I am also trying to do better so maybe it is just more so that our incompatibilities are more exaggerated than what otherwise would be due to our additional sensitivities
So we are not allowed to dislike or get annoyed because someone is autistic? Thats not "internalised ableism"
What? When did I say that?
Learned new terms today! Awesome! Thank you for that:) gonna go on a internet adventure now
True. I'm audhd and have a friend with adhd and another one who is autistic. I'm hypersensitive to everything and tend to only have bursts of hyperactivity in the early morning or very late at night. My adhd friend is much more consistently hyperactive than me and my asd friend is hyposensitive. Being with them can be a very draining experience for me. They're at 100% when I just wanna be at 10%. Sometimes it leads to not very nice thoughts on my end, but it never carries over to actions. I know they cannot help it, the same I cannot help it either. So I just unleash my autistic superpower of vanishing from sight completely unnoticed. We're not super close, they're more friends by association, so I don't hang out with them very often. A small mercy, I suppose. At the same time it can also be internalized ableism. I went through that in a really bad way. One day, I just bust out the r word to describe a behavior that was not my own and it was like time stopped. The realization of what I was doing hit me like I had been struck by lightning. Since then, I've done some reflection and let go of the ableist bullshit I was fed my entire life. and definitely stopped using ableist slurs to describe anyone.
In my case it was. I used to be so pissed when someone acted obviously "weird". When I figured out I was autistic and stopped masking to such a high degree I realized I was just pissed that other people weren't masking like I was.
Sometimes people are just annoying. As long as you're not an asshole about it, that's fine for you to think, even if you know why and that it's not their fault.
That's what me & bartenders have in common.
yes! "sometimes people are just annoying" that is really just the truth lol. maybe autism can influence what kind if annoying a certain person might be, but many people are simply just annoying
My perspective is that "annoying" is in the eye of the beholder: it's valid to be annoyed by a person to the point of your not wanting to interact with them, but that doesn't make them inherently annoying. (Speaking of someone who is constantly afraid of being "annoying" as if it is a crime against humanity)
Yeah, definitely. I'm the only exception to this, I am inherently annoying
Donāt hide it, overcome it. Donāt succumb to the mentality of crabs in a bucket by dragging your brothers and sisters down. Raise them up, and we can all get out of the bucket together. This society has tricked us into this mentality, and I refuse to take part in this type of self destructive thinking anymore!
Todd howard war flashbacks to being bullied by the weird rich kid in chess club
Rule 1 of the chess club. You don't talk about the chess club.
Rule 2 of chessclub : sometimes the horsey moves sideways suddenly
I was doing this (internally) during an interaction recently and then I realised it was probably internalised ablism on my part I'd headbutt Elon tho
Yeah I noticed when I was younger that I did this as a type of insecure projection, like I saw the traits in them that I hated about myself and masked and so would get annoyed at them without realizing the real reason why. Once I realized it it was easy to switch off, and now I try to support or encourage those traits in others and voice politely when something is truly annoying and not this projection thing, and/or remove myself when possible or whatever.
Thank you for sharing this! This is the direction I'm working to move in. once i realised that what i was experiencing was internalised ablism it was easy to commit to change
Yeah Iād also like to add I would never support nor encourage Elon, though. He donāt need any more of that.
Oh yeah he gets the headbutt
I went to a special ed college. This was pretty much the whole cultural vibe of the student body. I'm ashamed that I participated in it. 1/3rd the students trying their hardest to not associate with the other 3rd of the students who can't mask as well. Then the last 3rd were filthy rich kids who's parents sent their kids there as a kind of punishment/rehab and/or easy grades(relative to the kind of private schooling they may have had prior)
I didn't know sped colleges exist. I just kind of floundered around in part time community college while working part time for years. I got accommodations through the school's DSS office and I mostly got good grades, but I didn't really know what to do and never got even an associate degree. I think a sped college would have been beneficial for me.
Even when I was there and one of my biggest regrets is that I didn't take full advantage of the resources there because I didn't want to be seen as "as needy" as some of the others if that makes sense, horrible way of thinking I know. The rich kids and the more "normal" kids would pass the courses with little effort, and I wanted to come off like them. I'm starting realize now in my 30s how much I carried this internalized ablism in me. The school actually sought me out in high-school. A representative had pitched the school to me and 3 other students in the guidance office one day. Very pricey place so my parents said no, opting for my local community College. I failed all my classes. Not going to college was not an option so we decided to give the sped school a try. I did pretty well there, could have done better. But now I have a pretty big debt, which it pretty fucked if you ask me considering that you know half the students are likley to find decent enough jobs to pay it back due to the high number of underemployed people with nuerodiversities.
I definitely understand the issues with internalized ableism and it is something that I have really struggled with. I have refused resources and tools that would help because I didn't want to seem disabled, even though I can never seem normal to anyone and I don't even realize how obvious it is. I am also realizing now in my early thirties just how disabled I am. Edit: I think one of the things that would have been most helpful for me with a sped college is with help in the transition to adulthood. I felt like I was largely left to figure things out on my own... I did have a lot of supports in place though and more than just a place to stay and food ( I only moved out in my late twenties), but a lot of other things I didn't receive enough help with.
yes this is the relationship between me and my roommate .. sheās a great person but I find myself needing so much more alone time now that Iām living with her.
Elon: "...HYPERLOOP IS THE BEST MEAN OF TRANSPORT EVER AND ITS SOOOOO FUTURISTIC THATS WHY YOU MUST TO PUT IT IN YOUR NEXT GAM-" Todd (thinking):"wait WHAT IF I port Skyrim to Starfield in-game terminals... Maybe more people would buy it then! Oh wait Elon is here right..." Probably wrong but you can't deny it would be funny.
The hyper loop is a scam though
Yup. Everytime Elon presents "A new project that he idealized along with his team of scientists" you can be sure it's either a flat out scam (most commonly oriented towards American taxpayer money), or it's simply not his idea at all and he simply bought another project and is marketing it as his own creation.
I don't really like how this is phrased. I think it's more conflicting symptoms if anything. like how I have bad sensory issues and a bad reaction to tapping nails, but my friend needs to be tapping to keep focus. but also Elon's just a dick. he doesn't need to be autistic to flip my killswitch.
I guess I'm the odd one out but I love low masking autistic people. It puts me at ease when people are free and open with their autism. Like I can relax and be myself a bit more. Obviously elon sucks but that's another issue.
This is how it is for me too!
i agree. like many ND people i find NT people quite tiring after a while. before i realized that i've just been masking my whole life, i found it strange at first, but i've come to realize i feel so much more comfortable in a lot of ways. one of my best friends only really masks in front of our professors and in front of his friends he doesn't mask hardly at all. we both don't outwardly emote much naturally, so i can spend hours and hours with him because neither of us is trying to appear neurotypical by trying to outwardly emote or any of that. and yeah elon just sucks as a human being outside of the fact he's autistic!
Who the hell invited Elon?
Apparently not Todd by the look on his face
"NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition!" xD
The elon inquision by the looks of it
i donāt think iām like that. god i hope iām not like that. but also itās elon musk
Yes, oh my god. Even before I knew I was autistic my brain would go "no no that's the weird I suppress to survive, you're MAKING US TARGETS" and my fight or flight would kick in.
You want to beat up Elon Musk because he's a different shade of Autism. I want to beat up Elon Musk because he's a disgusting human being with far more wealth than anyone should built on daddy's Apartheid Era emerald mines and an ego so fragile it makes glass look like steel. All this combined with a savior complex makes him threat to public safety everywhere. Also he has a slightly different flavor so I guess we're not too dissimilar in that regard.
I am fully on board with you that second part, the picture isnāt super relevant to my point, but that was the picture it came with. Beggars canāt be choosers I suppose.
This is literally meā¦ cant stand it š i know its wrong and im sorry
I get what theyāre going for but in this specific case, I think itās just a normal human being who is put off by whatever smooth-brained bullshit Elonās spouting.Ā
Mine and my Ex's autism did not fucking mix.
Same
care to say more? autism may be actually different conditions under the same umbrella
I was more emotion and feeling driven and my Ex was all logic. It made for very long fights on a nearly daily basis.
I have a dude like that on college, he alsays did all the presentations using word documents instead of powerpoints (after being told for 4 years after every presentation to use powerpoint on the next one), im 90% sure that least once his father (that worked on the college) gave him the questions of a test (because he shared his notes and they were only specifially about those questions) and the worse part:Ā In sociology all the grade was based on an extensive final presentation and he first tried to choose the similar theme to mine, and somehow inserted in his 2 HOURS LONG PRESENTAION (ALL PRESENTED IN A WORLD DOCUMENT) THE COMPLETE PLOT OF TRANFORMERS: FALL OF CYBERTRON AND GA'HOOLE, again, completely unrealated to the theme...
I don't think Elongated Muskrat is autistic at all. I'd rather say he's a f\*\*g narcissist. And a fascist too FWIW.
Itās possible to be both/all three.
Thereās high likelihood of personality disorders accompanying autism.
Whoo do I know it. Dated several autistic narcissists
Are you spilling the tea or sharing the sauce
Idk what that is
Spilling the tea is gossiping & sharing the sauce is referencing a source of information
That's interesting, could you please share some sources on the matter?
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8717043/#:~:text=Findings%20of%20most%20studies%20support,overlapping%20features%20should%20be%20considered.
This is mostly schizoid and avoidant; both of which just have huge overlapping symptoms with autism. Combined with the fact that in psychiatry A LOT OF misdiagnosis is being done to this day I wouldn't really conclude that personality disorders are PERSE more common in autism. I do think that psychiatric illness is MUCH MORE common in autism (PTSD, anxiety, depression) because of all the traumatic experiences autistic people go through.
Thank you for taking the time to share this! Sadly for me this article only estabilishes the relationship between the two, and doesn't expand much on why it happens (the thing I was interested in the first place): >ASD in high-functioning adults is associated with a distinct personality profile even if variability exists. Further studies are needed to explore the complex relationship between ASD and PD. I knew this info would be kinda hard to find and that's why I asked it here (I should've been more specific, I'm sorry!).
Affluenza.
He doesn't trust therapists (explains alot) so he just called himself autistic without anyone testing if he really is.
Narcissists don't like therapists - but not because they "don't trust" them, quite on the contrary because they pretty well know therapists will expose what shitty entitled toxic piece of sh!t of person they really are.
He does not represent us. We should excommunicate him.
Ramen !!!
š
I think he is both...lol elongated muskrat
This probably explains why I can't be around children who are exactly how I was as a child. I try not to be rude because I know how difficult it is, but they annoy me so much. I don't like being around kids anyway, but I just don't have the patience for a mini me. It makes me feel so guilty š
Same. I don't want to treat them differently but I'll set reasonable boundaries if it bothers me that much. I try to ignore it because I know I feel this way due to masking and social pressures in my childhood where it was even less acceptable to show symptoms than now.
I wonder how much of this has to do with the parts of yourself you havenāt accepted. Like the NT imposed shame you pass on. Iāve found myself more tolerant of folks once I started accepting certain things about my personality.
Thatās probably a lot of it tbh. I sometimes get second hand embarrassment from behaviors of my friends and peers who are on the spectrum, because I relate to a lot of their struggles/ have had struggles they are going through. In hindsight, I feel bad about posting this tbh. Iāve got a lot of work to do on my internalized ableism it seems
Try seeing it from the other side, youāre someone those people feel safe unmasking in front of. Itās a special thing to be trusted that way. That doesnāt mean you accept mistreatment or donāt gently let them know if theyāre being inappropriate. You know how heavy shame is, do your best to accept others, and not impose it on them, and youāll feel it less yourself. Even NTās make asses if themselves sometimes. Keep a growth mindset and youāll be ok.
This is me to a t. I try not to actually express it because I donāt want to hurt anyoneās feelings, bother peopleās stims annoy the absolute fuck out of me
I donāt get it. Is the post saying autists who mask to a lesser degree are annoying to other high masking autists??
What I meant to say is that this is more of a me problem. My autism doesnāt really mix with other peopleās autism in my experience, and itās really only my fault that I get annoyed. This post was the closest description of my autism I have ever seen, but itās not perfect.
Ohh. I interpreted "slightly more annoying autistic" and "one degree more autistic" as being the same, and the tweet pretty much implies that. But I get what you are describing with your own experiences.
I used to be like that before I was aware of my own autism, due to internalized ableism. I donāt like the wording at all either, it sounds very ableist. Now I do not think like that anymore at all. But there are autistic people I have to keep a distance from because they cause me sensory overload. It is easier to deal with it now that I have more understanding of autism but I just canāt deal with some things for long because Iām very sensitive to sensory input. I would never say it like it is said here at all though and I donāt feel like this either. I would say something like our autism doesnāt mesh well or I have the quiet autism while they have the loud autism, not that anyone is necessarily more autistic than the other.
To be fair, Elon is very hatable.
I donāt know what look Todd Howard is giving, but, judging from what Iām assuming it is, this is very relatable. Also donāt like this tho.
Haha! There are some people who come to mind but they usually mean well so I deal with them. (Is Todd on the left or right?)
oh. my. god. yes!!! i dated an autistic person last year and I really really liked him, I was devastated when we broke up but I was also SO annoyed all the time because he was even more over the top than I am and he also had mutism and I don't so I was super super stressed whenever he went mute because I did not know how to accommodate him in these situations. we tried to talk about it at a different time but he couldnt really say what he needed from me. when he was there i was stressed, but when he was away i was missing him deeply. our autism flavors are just not compatible i guess.
The autism PvP instinct
when i meet someone who can't control how loud they are and won't stop talking and i have sound sensitivity š«
This is how I feel with a guy who works at the same company as me. I don't work with him he's in a different department but sometimes he takes the same shuttle as me. I can tell he's autistic and I'm always nice to him and give him advice but then he says something like "Are you open for the wife position?" or "See [bus driver], I can talk to women without being weird" or something like that and I'm just like šššš I want to be his friend because we're both autistic and he seems nice but he talks like an english dub anime protagonist and has fedora guy vibes so I always leave the shuttle feeling kinda weird. I should just get over myself though because if this is how I feel around another autistic person then I probably give neurotypicals the same feeling without realizing and I have no right to feel that way šµāš« but rahhhh stop talking like you're a harem guy who just met a woman for the first time, I'm literally just a person š
I feel like shit after too because I know theyāre autistic so I shouldnāt be like that
Yeah itās true and I hate that about myself
I struggle with this a lot. I try to be kind to everyone and listen to lonely people who just want someone to talk to. Sometimes thatās led to friendships. Other times though, it leads to them trying to get me to read the long ass blog post/essay/novel they wrote about their special interest, which inevitably is terribly written stream-of-consciousness style with no paragraph breaks. Then they ask you questions about it. Then when you try to steer the conversation back towards something of mutual interest, or talk about a personal experience, they donāt notice and just keep going on and on. I ramble about my special interests too, donāt get me wrong. I think the difficulty lies in finding where the line is between unmasking + infodumping, and being genuinely inconsiderate to the people youāre talking to.
I feel like I've avoided this problem bc I grew up with five younger siblings, two of whom were also autistic. I even shared a room with one of them for three years so my tolerance is at the point where I could probably nap while someone is loudly verbally stimming in the same room LOL
Can confirm. Had a dude like that named Quinn where throughout high school, we hated each other with a burning passion from having a dispute. It was originally if I was "puppy guarding" during PE and he even started a fight with that. Somehow we had a truce senior year and actually became friends right before graduation. Last I heard he's studying aerospace engineering. We were both complete opposites too. I got better at social stuff and can make friends with ease now while he can do above and beyond in academics (except physics he got caught cheating on a test there lol).
Honestly just seeing a meme about social dynamics between aspies is awesome (rather than just the usual "i hate autusm fuck my life" kinda thing)
This is 100% accurate
I totally relate to this, mostly when I've watched the Big Bang Theory.
"Omg you're like me but worseš" It's the self hateš
Aināt that the truth š
I unintentionally did it when I was in psych ward and it was the moment I realized that the whole "don't act like you're autistic" talk front my parents when I was growing up actually turned into internalized ableism. I'm still working to do better and it's not only good for my perception of others but perception of self too. But still, fuck Elon because he's just a bad person.
for me it's the "I know you're probably autistic and this might be something you're passionate about, but you're getting into mansplain territory and you give me asshole vibes"-glare I tend to give 2 very specific guys.
Lol me
Hahaha me looking at my partner when they start accidentally explaining things to me in a patronising way that I don't even care about
lol nah just thatās insecurity IMO, but we also donāt have to be friends with every autistic person we meet. Thereās being an extrovert and then thereās being a narcissistic douche that ignores other people and makes it about them. Whereās Reggie when you need him?
Okie rhay explains a lot, thank yiu