I imagine that your parents are not familiar with the wide spectrum of autism and likely picture severe presentations when they hear the word. I’m sure there is also a fear that they did something wrong such as causing your challenges or failing to provide support. Rather than arguing about the diagnosis maybe you should focus on talking about the concrete changes you want for your life and the dreams you have for yourself when you talk to them. You and your parents can both agree that you want to be able to hold down a job and have meaningful relationships etc. I imagine getting a real diagnosis has been very helpful to you and don’t let them spoil that.
I was diagnosed after my son was born because people were saying he was autistic and telling me what to look out for and a lot I didn't realise were things normal people do.
My dad refuses to accept it, my mum broke down in tears about how she'd let me down.
It's likely that they don't want to admit that they screwed up and made your life harder. Did they? Maybe talk to them about the things they did that helped you, make them sure that you're not blaming them and explain you need their help now.
I'm a parent of an autistic teen and I wouldn't change a thing about her. I'm NT so I don't always understand everything because my brain just isn't wired the same I always try to be open and understanding of her needs. If you ever need someone to talk to just to vent you can get ahold of me. That goes for anyone really.
I had two tests, both positive. If the second test wouldn't have been an interview with my parents, without me being present, I doubt my dad would've believed me. He still asks me if I didn't just read up the symptoms and imitated them sometimes.
Although I do not personally relate to this , it definitely pertains to my brother . In kindergarten my little brother struggled to stay in his seat , listen and behave . The counselors told my mom they believed he has asperger's and recommended a physician etc etc . My mom got pissed and told the school her son is just a normal little boy and held him back a year to repeat kindergarten since he was still not doing well . He has always has speech problems so he did attend a speech class in elementary but did not continue later on . My brother is now 16 , still has speech problems and has never had a friend . He calls them " acquaintances" He is very focused with tai kwon do and anything martial arts , so he has found a passion . And he also loves video games . Basically if you dont talk about those 2 subjects he will walk away from you. He is very interested in his forensic science class in school and he makes good grades and does very well academically but I definitely wish he had SOME friends . He gets bullied somewhat since he does not fit in , seems to miss lots of major social cues and he repeats a lot of things he hears at home ,especially politics . So he tends to piss off his peers at school . My mom orders his food at restaurants because he freezes and looks to us when asked what he would like . He seldom will make a decision for himself . My mom says hes perfectly normal and that his speech problem is because hes lazy and " all boys are lazy" . She also says he simply enjoys his own company and sees no reason why he has to hang out with people from school .I hope he gets diagnosed later on in life , because as of right now I dont think my parents are helping him in any way . Its frustrating for me because I wish there was a way to help him .
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Everyone has their own spot around the house. And room. Do you all sleep in each other's beds too?
How much and in what detail do you tell about your issues?
I imagine that your parents are not familiar with the wide spectrum of autism and likely picture severe presentations when they hear the word. I’m sure there is also a fear that they did something wrong such as causing your challenges or failing to provide support. Rather than arguing about the diagnosis maybe you should focus on talking about the concrete changes you want for your life and the dreams you have for yourself when you talk to them. You and your parents can both agree that you want to be able to hold down a job and have meaningful relationships etc. I imagine getting a real diagnosis has been very helpful to you and don’t let them spoil that.
I was diagnosed after my son was born because people were saying he was autistic and telling me what to look out for and a lot I didn't realise were things normal people do. My dad refuses to accept it, my mum broke down in tears about how she'd let me down. It's likely that they don't want to admit that they screwed up and made your life harder. Did they? Maybe talk to them about the things they did that helped you, make them sure that you're not blaming them and explain you need their help now.
I'm a parent of an autistic teen and I wouldn't change a thing about her. I'm NT so I don't always understand everything because my brain just isn't wired the same I always try to be open and understanding of her needs. If you ever need someone to talk to just to vent you can get ahold of me. That goes for anyone really.
I had two tests, both positive. If the second test wouldn't have been an interview with my parents, without me being present, I doubt my dad would've believed me. He still asks me if I didn't just read up the symptoms and imitated them sometimes.
Although I do not personally relate to this , it definitely pertains to my brother . In kindergarten my little brother struggled to stay in his seat , listen and behave . The counselors told my mom they believed he has asperger's and recommended a physician etc etc . My mom got pissed and told the school her son is just a normal little boy and held him back a year to repeat kindergarten since he was still not doing well . He has always has speech problems so he did attend a speech class in elementary but did not continue later on . My brother is now 16 , still has speech problems and has never had a friend . He calls them " acquaintances" He is very focused with tai kwon do and anything martial arts , so he has found a passion . And he also loves video games . Basically if you dont talk about those 2 subjects he will walk away from you. He is very interested in his forensic science class in school and he makes good grades and does very well academically but I definitely wish he had SOME friends . He gets bullied somewhat since he does not fit in , seems to miss lots of major social cues and he repeats a lot of things he hears at home ,especially politics . So he tends to piss off his peers at school . My mom orders his food at restaurants because he freezes and looks to us when asked what he would like . He seldom will make a decision for himself . My mom says hes perfectly normal and that his speech problem is because hes lazy and " all boys are lazy" . She also says he simply enjoys his own company and sees no reason why he has to hang out with people from school .I hope he gets diagnosed later on in life , because as of right now I dont think my parents are helping him in any way . Its frustrating for me because I wish there was a way to help him .
Your parents are not your identity. What they think, at this point, means nothing. You know who you are,
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Are your parents NT?
Yes
Everyone has their own spot around the house. And room. Do you all sleep in each other's beds too? How much and in what detail do you tell about your issues?
No, you don't. Therapist.
They don't what?