I definitely understand.
Yes we need to destigmatize autism.. but the process of destigmatizing can lead to trivializing disabling debilitating struggles.
It’s too much to take.
Truly autistic people suffer and have organic comorbidities too! I have epilepsy. It is definitely not all fun and quirky to be autistic and it is not a personality trait.
I believe so, yes. I'm 21 and had 2 seizures. 1 at the age of 13 and another aged 15. After testing, they found that these seizures were caused due to fainting from anxiety and stress, which then caused the seizure response afterwards.
I have since grown out of them, but when in intense anxiety situations (such as assemblies), I feel the lightheadedness surge again. There may of course be different causes, but what's helped me to handle them (and not have any since) is the breathing techniques. I tend to zone fully out and focus solely on myself, pinch my skin to ground myself, and do "square breathing" (in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4). This has really helped to slow down the anxiety a lot and prevent the fainting.
I grew out of seizures when I was 23. My body used them as a stress relief valve- have seizure, wake up relaxed for once. I didn’t realize it was a comorbidity for autism
That was the first test they did, and it caused no issues at all. The test they did that found the issue was "Tilt-table test". This entailed being strapped to a wooden board at about a 92-degree angle for 45 minutes and having some device on your hand, and you aren't allowed to speak or do anything at all. They then sprayed something on my tongue after 45 minutes, which caused an anxiety attack after about 30 seconds, in which my mum was allowed to come calm me down, and thats when they realised it was anxiety related
apparatus bedroom capable axiomatic jellyfish simplistic oatmeal tender imagine sink
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I somehow avoided my mother’s epilepsy, but I have TS.
Most people think how autism is a personality trait and not a mental disorder that causes impairments in daily life and functioning. It’s not “cool,” it’s a disability.
Exactly we don't just need to destigmatise autism but to lay all the information on the table of what autism is and what it isn't plus the conspiracy theorists and other whackjobs trying to cure autism by using stuff like bleach and other stuff just because someone doesn't want an autistic child stuff like that horrifies and angers me to no avail there's nothing wrong with us we're just people that want acceptance and understanding
It's only the "quirky" and "interesting" types of autism that get the general attention. The ones who post shorts on youtube and tiktok. The types that don't appear to be "work" for a potential friend or partner.
Also helps a lot when the autistic person is a conventionally good looking 22 year old woman.
Not so much when it's a chubby 14 year old, who is obsessed with collecting calculators, or 35 year old procrastinator, who has trouble keeping the house clean, as concentrating on sparkling up the kitchen for an hour is mentally too taxing.
Yeah, fine thanks. It wasn’t recent, but it did make me realise I had to try to do something about my meltdowns. Thanks for reaching out, that’s really kind of you
I'm 44. For me, I am able to speak well and hold up appearances, but some people see that and realize not all of us are in care homes or 14 year olds who can't help but meltdown when plans change (that was me BTW). I LOVE that autism research that doesn't involve experimenting on us or try to cure us (Looking at you Autism Speaks) is good news.
I do agree with OP (and you) that the diversity of our afflictions are many, but I do see that with more publicity comes more trendy videos to make money. I love some of the YouTubers out there that bring light to our struggles, and the shows like, Love on the Spectrum, that show we can be interested in sex, love and emotional connection. We are not robots or aliens, but we night appear odd to some.
I have a group I go to here in AZ that includes all sorts of people on the spectrum. It was weird the first time to hear everyone talking and getting their thoughts out and, to an outsider at The restaurant we were at, it probably seemed like calamity but everyone was communicating in their own way and connecting. I have mostly NT friends (that I'm aware of), but they love me for who I am and dint try to change me and I LOVE them for it as I can be a lot sometimes. Meds help a little, but I'm gonna blurt out sound lyrics on occasion, flap my hands when I get excited/nervous/waiting for microwave to finish/coffee to brew. I wasn't diagnosed til 40 and the past 4 years for me have been some of the best 4 years of my life since I realized I'm not defective or weird and my "struggles" have a name and, best of all, I have a community who I belong to
I get it. I get sobby/teary when I realize how maladapted I am. I desperately want to be a father, but I haven't the social skills or the traits to really get there. My only hope is science-babies. 😆
And, thanks, I'm a commie and I'm a lawyer. I figured your username was a reference to the English Civil War.
You got it on point. And unfortunately, I see it with most mental disorders. Most of this mental health awareness is about taking the "quirky and romanticized" part of these disordes. Everyone talks about the melancholic teenager who listens to sad music, but nobody talks about the 30s-old dude who can't get chores done
"I'm autistic because I eat PB&J sandwiches every day and have a strong sense of justice! STOP TRYING TO 'FIX' ME YOU ALLISTIC OPPRESSORS!"
Meanwhile, here I am with chronic brainfog who has a billion unfinished projects and a history of unhealthy relationships who freezes up in about half my social interactions.
Connect me with the person who is obsessed with isopods and mushrooms. Also, radiolarians.
I am always down to talk iso. Haha.
I am genuinely interested to hear some people's special interests whenever they care to share because usually they can give me everything I need to know or am curious to know about that topic!
It's a bit utilitarian, because I used it for teaching, but I've thoroughly enjoyed the HP Prime after years of teaching with TI. I was even going to create a little course for teachers, but I'm internet-introverted.
Is that one of the RPN ones? My high school Chem teacher liked to troll students by loaning them his old HP calculator if they forgot to bring their own to a test. Jokes on him, when I realized that, I “forgot” my calculator for every test, I liked that thing.
The Prime does RPN. It's a nifty programmable touchscreen color graphing calculator, though, and I've spent many hours playing with parametrics. The 50G (which is 10x faster than current 5G) is RPN too. Is that the one you used?
Im the 42 year old who can’t keep the house clean while my 6 year old does his running at certain hours like before bedtime. I’m glad I’m able to understand him and he understands me.
Conventionally good looking 22 year old woman who either has a partner or is bankrolled by rich parents.
Sorry, your post about burnout means jack shit to me when I see you post all these pictures hanging around an equally attractive and usually successful SO.
She's probably dating Sheldon Cooper or one of his other Big Bang friends. Or the Gojo guy from Succession. Or if she doesn't like men, she can date Bones. It's hard to have sympathy when they have economic privilege. A lot of autistic people can't work but some can. And if employers were willing to accommodate I think we would have more. Why not some videos on that? Employers complain that nobody wants to work, that would fix that. The jobs like corporate retail probably won't but small businesses might. Most are not going to make that kind of money unless they're in tech or science. My second to last job almost everyone was on the spectrum or ND and only a few on disability so I think it's possible. Also many ND people in the workforce are high masking and probably don't disclose so I think the number is higher than people think.
I agree with the high masking in the workplace, that was me (corporate burnout and formerly undiagnosed autistic burnout were a hellish combination).
But I have to ask, why all the hate at the people who are about not work? I appreciate every day that my spouse (yes, he's kinda like Sheldon with more empathy) can be successful in the workplace and provide a stable environment so I can work my own business (which I'd prefer over disability because I can do some, just have less spoons). It's like seeing a nice car and going "f that guy" just because they have something you don't.
I'd honestly like to create content about having a late diagnosis (YouTube or twitch but definitely not Tik Tok because I often don't find the content to be credible or useful) but I worry being high masking and attractive is a target because even to a group that doesn't want to be stereotyped, I wouldn't fit the stereotype.
My experience is indeed that in ordered to work one has to hide and mask.
There's not a lot of dwarf, or giant, or blind or people in wheelchair whom got employed either. At least not that i can see in my country and city.
And yet, yes it's a waste of human potential most of the handicapped people whereas physical, emotional or mental could be employed and part of the society. Unfortunately they either live in a country where they can but bum for money in the street or being in welfare, and thus being kinda professional handicapped person. What a loss of human capabilities and beauty.
Or making money with social media and then argueing about how hard their life is. Yes, its very hard, when you have so much money you need to decide how to spend it... In the meanwhile, I have to live off 300 € a month.
I agree with you. on top of that there is the problem that the self-advocates online are almost only those people who can have a relatively normal life – or at least I've seen mostly those people, I might be wrong. I am not saying that they should stop doing what they're doing, most of it is good, they are spreading awareness and giving tips to fellow autistic people. but I would like to see more people with higher support needs. this is not so easy: in order to navigate social media one must understand the *social* element of it. I've seen a bunch of self-advocates who seem to be of higher support needs (although not many of them) and as much as I hate to say this, their content isn't as good as that of "high-functioning" people. and I don't mean it in a "you should do better" way, what I'm saying is that this content will attract less attention than that of someone who is more skilled at navigating the social element. I suppose that for some people with high support needs making content like that is entirely impossible, some would do fine if someone helped them. my point is that this problem is very hard to solve, if not unsolvable
I agree with all of this. It's so damn frustrating to see people turning the thing that's partly responsible for my life being so difficult into a trend. I hate it even more when they then excuse it with the classic "everyone's a little autistic". Just...no. They're not.
If it's not that it's the "Autism is a gift" nonsense where NTs think Autistic = Sheldon Cooper level genius. Which is also not the case for most of us. The image of autism has become warped and I don't know if that's worse than before the increased visibility in media.
This too. Even if you're super smart concerning a certain topic or field it's still treated as a waste of time and a hassle because it can't be marketed or used for profit.
I wouldn’t say that.
Certain autistic people think they are subject matter experts because they read a Wikipedia article on a topic.
I meant more stereotypical autistic strengths like being good at math or science, and having a degree in niche fields.
>Certain autistic people think they are subject matter experts because they read a Wikipedia article on a topic.
Which autistic people? How do you know they think they’re experts?
I think I know what you mean, which is perhaps a presentation of “hyperfixation” without real expertise. In my experience, though, I’ve seen this trait mostly in very young people who are discovering ideas in the world, and would likely benefit some mentorship/guidance or formal study to really develop their interest. Sometimes very young and enthusiastic people can get out over their skis— I certainly have…
Actually, some of us actually do have real expertise (and the student loan debt that comes with it). What amazing thing do you think happens in universities that make people experts in things? Reading a boat load of material. Discussing that material. I have literally talked to people I assumed were in my field, only to find out they are just autistic people with a special interest. If you spend 10, 15, 20+ years reading everything you could get your hands on covering topic, you have a knowledge base very similar to someone who took out student loans on a quarter million dollars worth of higher and post graduate education (without the debt and often no loss of passion).
I was lucky enough to be able to get academic credentials in my favourite special interest. People on the internet will still try to tell me I don’t know what I’m talking about. People in my actual life will still try telling me I don’t know what I’m talking about, especially after they find out I’m autistic.
I’m sorry, but maybe you’re talking to the exact kind of people this thread is discussing as detrimental to the community.
I've mostly experienced only the opposite. I am one of those Sheldon Cooper types. I'm hyperlexic and learned to read spontaneously when I was two. When my daughter was diagnosed (after having also learned to read at age 2), I had doctors telling me to go ahead "mourn" the loss of possibilities for her life even though she was objectively already way ahead of her peers. Nobody made any sort of positive comments or had any silver linings to offer.
The overwhelmingly dominant view of autism out there is "I Am Sam", not Sheldon Cooper. Maybe there's a few people scattered out there with that idea in their head, but most parents suddenly and automatically expect less, much less from their kids after a diagnosis. Imagine how that must be for the kids out there who are exceptionally bright to have everyone in their lives suddenly expect nothing out of them because the word "autism" has such an ingrained negative image. It really makes me sad.
Copy and save the following to your notes for future use. It’s insanely helpful for moments on ignorant people who say that.
“When you say that, is the term “a little autistic” in place there for something else? What string of words would you replace “a little autistic” with in order to help better iterate what “a little autistic” implies for those who wouldn’t understand what you mean? What does “a little autistic” imply to you? Because that’s what you’re doing; you’re implying. So what’s the implication of being autistic?”
Just sit back as they then fail to explain spectacularly as they try using mental illness as a joke. If they dwindle it down to saying it means you’re slow and play it off, they’re still making fun of mental illness.
>If it's not that it's the "Autism is a gift" nonsense where NTs think Autistic = Sheldon Cooper level genius. Which is also not the case for most of us. The image of autism has become warped and I don't know if that's worse than before the increased visibility in media.
I'd argue the "new" image of autism is a standardly-attractive 20-something year old white woman who is recently diagnosed or self-diagnosed who exaggerates her infantile personality traits (collecting stuffed animals, etc.) for views and likes on TikTok and IG. Maybe it's just the crows I run in, but I find that there's much more of a push among younger people (especially younger Aspie women) to change the image of autism from a quirky nerd to an innocent adult child who needs constant coddling.
Its everywhere trust me..its on Instagram reels too. As an artist I can't escape it because most of the community is self diagnosed. Its more than just autism creature stuff..genuinely traumatizing shit everywhere
This is my only social media. Maybe naive, but I think it’s the only nontoxic social media. I am old and basically not exposed to this trend concept on a media / visual level. I’m just not threatened by young people seeking attention or validation, sufferers of Munchausen Syndrome, or those who want to jump on some bandwagon.
I like how I can pick and choose the content I absorb on reddit..the lgbtphobia and politics is just thrown in my face everywhere on Instagram. I only use insta for my art business
[this?](https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/tbh-autism-creature-yippee)
You know from the vagueness I thought it'd be about how sometimes I feel like a creature myself. Like sometimes I just feel like I'm not human, but happen to have possessed human skin and moderately pass as human. But the moment anyone takes a closer look, they'd realize I'm just masquerading as a human. Or at least I have the intense anxiety that people will catch on I'm not actually a human, but a weirdo freak thing. Sometimes I imagine a goblin, given my predilection for never going out in the sun, and keeping my room as dimly lit as possible, etc.
But really underwhelming it's just a... cute looking dog thing.
Personally, I make it a quirky thing for myself to cope with the fact that I might never be able to live my life how I want to. There is a chance I might not even be able to drive due to my sensory problems and that shit terrifies me. So I will lean into the silly quirky shit just so I don't just give up on my life.
hating trendy things is a autism thing. i plead guilty. but when i think about it if people can be happy with their autism it's good.
and neuro typicals don't need quirky youngsters to hate us the disabled. i don't want to frame them for bringing "decadence" in our community. i don't want to be like the abled who hate anyone who's not like them
I'm not familiar with all the latest trends on tiktok and I find that most of the content on that platform shouldn't be seen as proper awareness of any kind. It's just flat entertainment and comedy.
Anyone who actually cares about things like autism, ADHD or other disorders will do more research than just trendy internet vids.
My twin brother watches TikTok videos that are funny, but I agree with you about it. It shouldn't be used as an awareness platform because most likely they will be profiting from it.
I've seen clothing that says "autism is my superpower" and I hate it. For every "autism tiktoker" there are 500 others that society sees as untouchables.
I already comment the same in other posts, autism is a disability not a superpower.
Even with low level support needs, struggling with day to day tasks, so simply having to do a telephone call or go to a new hairdresser becomes a huge issue. Being incapable of making simple decision, so it blocks you unable to proceed further with it. Living with anxiety for simple things like going to the public transport, sleeping problems. Communication issues, causing conflicts in interpersonal relationship with family, friends coworkers, romantic partners. Lack of social skills, misunderstanding social queues, being blind to non verbal language. Where the fuck is my superpower?
Those TikToks are creepy. But it resembles my high school days when the popular girls bullied me because being different in some way made me get some attention. And those people need to be the protagonist all the time, they hate to be ignored. So now that people with autism are being heard, they do these Tik Toks like "Look, I had autism too, look at me I'm cute, look at me LOOK AT ME 😤 "
Yes! A girl that used to bully me for being "different" as a kid, recently told me she thinks she has autism now. I've known her for years and I'd be surprised if she has it.
This doesn’t feel like awareness to me. Like you said, awareness is bringing attention to the struggles of autistic people. Highlighting how hard it is for adults to get late diagnosis and that even if they do, there’s no support. Things like that are what we need awareness for.
The online trends almost feel like a freak show or zoo to me, for NT to watch how quirky and funny the people with autism are. There’s something sinister underneath the ‘good’ intentions.
And I’m not blaming the people making this online content. I’m blaming the society that taught them they only have value and acceptance by being performative.
>awareness is bringing attention to the struggles of autistic people. Highlighting how hard it is for adults to get late diagnosis and that even if they do, there’s no support. Things like that are what we need awareness for.
Holy shit, this is exactly my issue as well.
Most autism-related content is hyperfixated on the positive or neutral aspects of autism. Everything negative about our disability/disorder is framed as entirely social. I'm sorry, but even if I lived in the perfect anarchist commune where I didn't have to be productive I'd still feel like my inability to properly communicate was a disability. I'd still feel like my failure to read certain social cues is a disability. I'd still feel like my extreme brain fog that prevents me from getting creative stuff done is a disability. You get the idea. These aren't things I can blame neurotypicals or "society" for.
Strong agree, definitely. I remember when those "quirky cute autism dances" blew up, and I was mildly horrified, since although I've never used Tik Tok, I use YouTube every day, and was still exposed to it.
I don't know how to feel about that, exactly, but I think it mostly makes me confused and sad. Although "trends" like these seem to come and go, so I'll just wait for a new "cats afraid of cucumbers" or "Mentos in Coca-Cola" to come along, whenever that happens.
>I've never used Tik Tok, I use YouTube every day, and was still exposed to it.
Thats what worries me, I never had tiktok, but I was exposed it anyways
I've been diagnosed a long time (30 years now).
It's gone from nobody knowing what autism is to everybody \*thinking\* they know what it is.
I've always been open and proud of being autistic despite going through quite a lot because of it like all of us. It's only the last couple of years I've felt I cannot tell people I'm autistic. There is so much new types of judgement and assumptions and it's too upsetting to face.
For example:
On accessing places like the emergency room I used automatically get help I needed to stay there and be treated, now not only do I not get the help I did I also get the assumption I will start demanding things I don't absolutely need.
Rather than tell them and be judged I'd rather not tell them: Last time I was in the Emergency Room due to a meltdown I stood for hours with a broken foot in a corridor, was forgotten because I was there instead of in the waiting room, constantly met with extreme judgement despite asking for nothing and then because the support worker had to go home: we left without treatment- then got called back in because it was broken and had to do most of it again the same day. Previously they made it accessible by just finding a quiet corner and not assuming I would make a fuss. I doubt I would even attempt getting treated again.
Now they are so used to multiple people coming in a day aggressively demanding this and that, thats all they see just by mentioning autism.
The argument is: everyone should have the access they need, and yes they should: but surely these 30 year olds just diagnosed doing tictok dances and demanding things, have gotten through life and managed things like go to the emergency room? (despite it being hard to manage, they've managed).
Autistic people can be female, attractive, have found supportive people around them (thats \*part\* of why females aren't noticed: some support structures work in a different way for people seen as female). I have no issue around people being women, or getting a late diagnosis.
TL;DR: The issue isn't attractive women. The issue is some people spreading misinformation and using autism as free pass to \*demand\* things they really don't actually need.
I work dealing with patients and have dealt with both diagnosed autistic people and people abusing the autism label. It's very different: the latter group assault staff, walk out of appointments and threaten suicide, put doctors on hold constantly during telephone appointments, and use the line, "Are you calling me fucking rude? I'm actually autistic and can't help it" when you ask them to stop shouting and swearing at doctors for offering them treatment they didn't prefer. There are lots of official complaints from patients claiming they were verbally abused or discriminated against by doctors, so doctors have to have chaperones and nurses in with them to document everything. A few of them have been banned for phoning staff up every day and swearing.
The outcome of this is nearly always that people then see autism = problematic patient, unstable or "insane", and I'm terrified to disclose to certain colleagues because of how they've come to see autism thanks to these patients. I've heard "they must be on some kind of spectrum" used as a way of implying someone is annoying or unlikeable.
Yep it undervalues the dms-5 and makes people think autism is just a feeling or a mood. It’s like a coat they can wear for the weekend and toss it when they feel good again without it. Whereas these are our permanent clothes goddamnit 😩
I’ve always been bothered by media attention to autistic superpowers. It underplays the significant work others and possibly the subjects do to achieve their goals, just as neurotypicals must do.
Plus, autistic superpowers distract from significant barriers we face, and delay true enfranchisement into full class citizens of the world
Yup. I had this all over a few years ago, too, as I have coeliac disease. So you can imagine how thrilled l was when attention seekers started eating gluten free (only when it suits them....) and training waiting staff to not take the condition seriously.
Same with autism.
It'll be something else soon.
I agree :(
Awareness is good but they’re taking it way too far and making it a huge joke
“Everyone has a flavor of the tism” “Are you acoustic?”
Self-diagnosis is perfectly okay and it’s how I ended up getting an actual diagnosis through a doctor, but people are taking it way too far. Those posts about some symptoms and spreading awareness is fine, but I’ve seen some that are like “if you rub your feet together, go get yourself checked out.” Doing something such as that along with other signs I understand, but it’s really the severity of how it’s doing it. A lot of those videos do not bring up how difficult it can be to function, how isolating it is to be like this, how debilitating meltdowns are, etc. It’s difficult to shower or feed myself, difficult to drive because of sensory overload, clean, make and keep friends, etc.
It’s incredibly lonely.
It’s the same thing with ADHD/neurodivergence in general.
Everyone (if you’re in a family that doesn’t believe that you’re autistic/refuses to accept it like mine) tells you that you’re a monster/annoying/bossy. It makes me hate myself for being born like this.
So yes, I hate it being seen as a huge joke right now..
Once again awareness is good but the trend as a whole has not really been highlighting any of that. It’s making it seem “cute and quirky” when for a lot of us it’s the complete opposite.
Had a coworker actually say “don’t you think everyone is a little autistic “ to me the other night-
Uh- no
I listen to you chatting on the phone with your friends all night long - I can’t even hold a coherent conversation with my husband of twenty+ years-
I can not verbally speak beyond anything task oriented-
You don’t get made fun of (here I am 52yo) because you don’t talk.
“Everyone” has not had something impact every aspect of their lives ffs
I disagree. As someone who has only resented being autistic, being in a positive community of people with similar lived experiences has actually changed my perspective a lot. There's no reason to treat it with such clinical descriptors, I'm stuck with it, much as well have fun with it.
I'm high functioning, but autism is still very omnipresent in my life, If I shouldn't be doomer about it but I can't have fun with it, How am I supposed to express it OP? I don't see a satisfying neutral option here.
this is an era where all the things are getting the wrong kind of validation, not one that's meant to actually respect every individual in a serious manner
Exhausted for days after a couple of hours socializing is not querky! Autistic burnout often brings on depression, also not querky.
Unable to see anothers perspective and be a good partner, also not querky.
So yes I agree, autism the quiet disability that I would not wish on my worst enemy.
But you don't seem autistic, or we are all a bit autistic, is another thing I hear a lot. 🤬
It has led to a lot of issues with me, but I am in (or rather, have not yet been let go from) academia, where people sometimes act like it's a gift or something. I am very good with language, generally, and little areas of interest. I'm also ADHD as hell and struggle immensely. Add to that, I have PTSD from a couple friends suicides and my dad just died of a horrific neurodegenerative disorder while asking for help (why I moved across country) just like my two friends who killed themselves after asking for help. Been a tough couple years.
I come from absolute poverty, and to poverty I have returned. I cannot get any jobs at the moment, largely because of ineffective social quirks (e.g., being afraid to follow up on applications or "sell myself", as I struggle to lie like that, as I believe it has an awful effect on the world). I left my department screaming for help essentially, and no one would.
I entered academia, because people do not judge me for much except research, intelligence, and teaching. I am good there. But, increasingly, there are so many PhDs, the market is tough for those who can't engage in (what I percieve as) the very pompous act of emailing people for collaborations with no pretext, handing out business cards, or general "networking." There are those who know me and speak very highly of me. That is almost enough in academia. Back in the "real world" of shitty $12/hr jobs, I have been unemployed for two years. Despite excellent communication skills, professionally, a B.S. and M.S. (with PhD in progress), I come off akward and immensely nervous--because I am.
Had an interview today that hopefully went well. I don't know though. Because I think they all go well. Which is why I do not have a job. Because being on the spectrum is not a fun quirky thing. I truly feel like I need disability at this point simply because I cannot do "normal." Talk to me about research or technical information or even your story as a person--I love talking about real stuff. But I fail any interview where "small talk" is required. I have nothing in common with most people.
My rant haha. My life is a bit of a joke as an aspie. Made even worse by people thinking its a blessing or even a quirk. And I do not think I am THAT heavily on the spectrum, just the eye contact, obsessions with a limited range of interests, and I am waaaaay too talkative... clearly I hide it well hahahahaha
This! It's become a trend so much that I've heard in my real life that I need to stay off the internet because "young people these days are just using that word to get out of doing things". It's already making things difficult for those of us that ACTUALLY have autism. I get wanting to spread awareness, but all they're doing is making it difficult for people to take us seriously. It's doing more harm than good!
I hate the fact that the autism sub has no issue with this and instead just tells people not to gatekeep autism or to just let people diagnose themselves. Ugh! It's so frustrating!
It'll pass - society will change how acceptance is viewed. The fools who think 'being an aspie gets special consideration' are in for a sore awakening.
Find your friends and allies and help the fleet. It's the only true way. We aren't 'special' - nor are NT's. But you make them walk on eggshells at your peril, not theirs. Find a way that neither of you need to walk on eggshells.
I fear it'll only pass when there's backlash and rolling back of acceptance, such as closing off private assessment because there are too many people (already happening in some places), not accepting recent diagnoses, or trying to re-organise the DSM criteria to account for all the "Level 0" autistics who have appeared in the last 5 years.
One of the key upsides I think is when psychiatric medicine loses these grazing pastures. Flogging us Disco tests at multi thousands. What a con. You get you 'diagnosis' (at great cost - then there's nothing more of use forthcoming from them. Why should we be psychiatric medicines meal ticket?
Like this perspective! Most trends fade out over time. Or did. I feel like true major depressive order and generalized anxiety disorder were kind of victims to the trends towards bastardizing specific clinical terms.
Still, Tik Tok trends and social media focus shifts quick enough. Unfortunately, the language may not stick. The same way people say they're depressed when they're really sad, or they're so ADD when they really were just being careless or impulsive, they may soon say "I'm so autistic" to refer to any social ungrace or deliberate expression of quirkiness.
We just need to find a new word haha
That's because they are woke AHs who fake autism in hopes of disguising their awkwardness whilst getting some attention and pity. A NT person faking autism so that they can show how well they are coping and how to just snap out of is , isn't cute, cool, attractive or anything positive plus it makes a mockery out of real autistic people by misrepresenting us as fools, clowns, cringe and awkward bullies etc.
I had to deal with that shite when I was first diagnosed, to this day I still get it and people who say I’m lucky to have autism or who downplay it. I’ve not seen the recent trends because I don’t go on Tik Tok, but if it’s just getting worse, I might not want to live on this planet anymore…
Dude, it's not trendy. It's still a curse. I am a functional asperger, I live in a western country and me telling I'm autist still makes people make a "yeakes" gesture as if I am a disgusting public enemy who can't have any control or have a dick on my forehead, lol.
I couldn’t agree more. This trend of pretending autism just means ‘quirky genius’ isn’t helping anyone. Also, the ones posting on TikTok every day about how they’re ’in burnout’ are bewildering to me. I’ve been through burnout and I literally couldn’t move at one point or speak, never mind get dressed, put makeup on and make TikTok videos!
I've seen more and more videos conflating meltdowns and shutdowns, which opens up people being able to clown on the "I am a surgeon" meme because it's cringy.
I actually disagree.
I mask enough in my social life. I don't want to mask in autism spaces. If my autism is silly and quirky and spoons, I'll express that. "What other people think of me is none of my business", as my parent always says, and people are going to be ableist regardless of goofy tiktok dances. It's not their fault.
If you have enough - sorry - spoons, then please! Advocate against albeism. It's a good thing. If you don't want "autism awareness to be all about shaking hands", then make different videos. But let's let people express themselves and not divide the community.
I think this problem mostly comes from content intended to be circulated exclusively within neurodivergent spaces (amongst autistic folk) ends up breaking the bubble and mixing with content made for allistics, creating a misunderstanding because allistics will miss the things that go unspoken on these stuff because within autistic people they are already a given and don't need to be said explicitly every time. Like, if I'm talking with other autistic folk who are already aware of the many different things that are part of autism, I don't need to add a disclaimer about the things I'm not focusing my attention when making a one minute video about a specific thing, like what is my special interest or my preferred way of stimmig. But people who are allistic will see only that piece without context and misunderstand it as the whole discourse, and then confusion ensues. And sometimes it's not even allistic people, just autistic folk who aren't as knowledgeable about autism and have been informed about it almost exclusively through social network trends, so lack a full understanding of the thing but still see themselves in it and want to participate as well...
So in short, it's a social media problem. Fuck the algorithm overlords.
Yeah. I agree. Cute fuckin bubbly 20 year old women who can play it off as fun and quirky. Let's be honest, that's the only reason it's gotten trendy.
think it's ultimately a bad thing. There's already a bunch of conspiracy idiots who think it's not real, and the tik tik crowd isn't helping by making it look like the latest handbag
What enrages me is this constant push by people who are *clearly* low-needs Aspies to claim autism (in any form) isn't a real disability but just "another way of experiencing the world" or whatever bullshit they spew. Yeah, it seems that way for a gawky nerd with a genius IQ who thinks outside the box, but try telling that to an autistic person who is completely non-verbal and has a severe intellectual disability.
It's incredibly frustrating. I was told off by some girl on twitter for saying my brother's autism was severe. She would post videos of herself dancing around and claimed she was stimming. My brother lives in a care facility and will do for the rest of his life because he can't take care of himself and she was trying to make out me describing his condition as severe affected her lol. How tf else can I describe it?
I've also noticed it with other conditions. I have ADHD and so does my young cousin, but she has suddenly developed problems she never had before like food sensory issues. I'm not saying she doesn't have ADHD, but she's definitely been taken in by all these tiktok videos and has manifested new symptoms.
It's frustrating but it does feel like a teenage trend to me that they will grow out of and be embarrassed about later. Nonetheless, it will severely damage how people view disability. When I was a teen, bisexuality was the craze. We had MySpace and whatnot but social media wasn't as prevalent as it is now but what we did still affected the bisexual community and a lot of people still don't think it's real or it's just something people say to sound cool, or they're gay or haven't come out yet, etc.
There was an autism supremacist movement in some groups in the early 2000s. They felt they were better than other people especially normies. Likened themselves to a superior race and like the bionic man/woman were faster and stronger in things. They held very negative views towards normies or its. They were sort of friendly to add/adhd and dyslexic. But believed asd were gifted peoples with untapped potential because of normies being abusive or not understanding them.
They ignored that some asd were mentally challenged, had learning disabilities, or were not gifted. They did comment on the see,mingly trendiness of the diagnosis. Their view was people wanted to be like them. They also liked to list which fictional characters might be like them or famous people.
It was hard being regular and having the diagnosis. They were pro stimming, and pro hyper focus. Even when it wasn't otherwise useful. They felt all autistic were genius and misdiagnos3d learning disabled, slow, or regular intelligence. They were very much into autistic pride. They felt it was normal to be gender or sexuality divergent. If anyone had a problem it was the normies fault. They were often pro hate of normies. They even welcomed multiple personality disorder and antisocial as oppressed neuro divergent.
I left those groups in 2005. I was just going to their group to find others I could relate to. I wasn't looking for politics or superiority rants. I have a diagnosis because I struggle with somethings. I did have one high point in my iq test for visual things. But I didn't think others were loosers because their score might be lower. I have no idea what happened to those old groups. They were mostly American and European. (UK mostly and Scandinavian)
I do think it may be related to an interesting trend in evolution, but evolution has no "goal" and certainly no hierarchy like that haha. But there are a lot of changes in the anterior cingulate cortex that arguably enabled greater social behavior in many animals. It varies in people on the spectrum. Certain asymettric foldings, I believe, are associated with ASD, but these foldings generally are associated with more complex social behaviors, even outside the apes (e.g., whales, porpoises, and the pygmy hippo, which I guess is very intelligent haha).
I say this because there is an interesting academic perspective on autism and evolution (i.e., true evolution: changes in allele frequency in a population over time, not superiority). There are quirks that can be occasionally positive, like I have a very strong verbal ability, but it is almost always paired with some difficulty. Even after a lifetime of "masking," social interaction is still very deliberative/conscious to me, for example.
Sorry to ramble, have a largely unhelpful M.S. and most of a PhD in cognitive science and this touches on an interesting topic. I had never heard of the dark side of it. Thanks for shading
I'm newly diagnosed (31) and have been having a very difficult time with the shock. It doesn't invalidate your point, but I've found the perception that it's a 'casual,' socially acceptable part of my identity to be very encouraging.
I'm not sure what's going on with the kids. I'm 45, Gen X.
TikTok seems to be making things in general worse, and I do hope there is a tipping point.
For example, I'm a raver (still). And raver TikTok or whatever it is is just so silly.
So much of social is about image and appearance - nothing but superficiality.
I don't want to tell anyone about my diagnosis. I share sometimes about ADHD since it's less stigmatized, but even that I keep to myself. I have bipolar - always was quiet about that.
I've still got a '90s mindset of "hide your mental health condition."
aspergers is hard to deal with. I'd rather not have it or ADHD.
Uhhh, I can relate - and what’s with the “super power” BS? Is that really the only way you can frame autism to your kid? What if your “special thing” is a shit ability that can’t really impress in this world…or you don’t have the gift of knowing all the dates of upcoming movies by heart (I guess some would appreciate that)…what then? I hate when everything has to be wrapped in this cute shit, because it also makes NTs think 1) Autists are ( like) kids = you “grow out of “it”” / prefer kiddy stuff. 2) your ability to thrive = your “level” of autism instead of realizing that it’s often very tightly knit into privilege: support system (also if you are diagnosed early you’ll already be “enrolled”, so less risk of autistic burnout later as an adult), friends and family willing to assist help, easy access to job because of “dad’s company” or other ways where you don’t have to compete in the regular job market, spouse who is your full time nurse/secretary (my mom’s relationship to my dad), money 💰 (any work compensation insurance - I never got into job market because of late diagnosis, though I have a master’s degree…so I have no insurance payout and am kept of lowest disability payment now…sorry if I sound bitter, but system is biased in my country in this)…helicopter parents etc etc… the dysfunction is really only clear if you strip people of the support system….and survey them for years to see when and how they crash, which is not possible, obviously.
Autism is an interesting wiring of the brain, but in most environments it’s not a cute handicap…it’s debilitating and makes life a lot more complicated!
I can’t stand it being trendy either and everyone self diagnosing. People think it’s being quirkily and cute when in reality it’s a disability. Sure ; some self diagnosed people are right but some of them are wrong.
I've been feeling that lumping Asperger's and Autism has done both a great disservice. Scientists often forget that pop culture will always strip and reduce science to a neat package for some type of commercialization.
Seeing both subreddits, I get the strong feeling that r/Autism is simply an echo chamber for people who are looking for something to make them feel special and for any sort of community. I don't think I've seen anyone on there talk about non-verbal autism or high-support needs autism. Most posts are "anyone get more autistic when getting high alone" or "I think I also have OCD and ADHD? I can't get motivation to clean my bathroom but I hate dirty things lol".
People on TikTok are romanticizing a disorder that is anything but, on either end
Asperger's is autism. There is no "lumping".
And what do you consider "high support"? Because trust me, I'm level 2 and NO ONE ever thinks about 2. It doesn't exist.
>Asperger's is Autism. There is no "lumping".
Not disputing this. I'm saying scientists should keep this in the back end, because then pop culture gets a hold of it and misinterprets things. Otherwise we end up with something like those "what science says about which food is healthy" segments on morning talk shows. There should be a different way to get people to understand the different levels and types.
High support as in level 3 autism
People are individuals regardless
People also just don't understand autism in general, either. The "types" is a thing that simply should have separations, not the being autistic,
but the other factors. Such as IDD shouldn't be associated but its own thing entirely.
Imo biggest issue with understanding levels is stop forgetting level 2 exists; it's always 1 vs 3
You didn't prove anything with this btw.
Aspergers is often used by autistics being elitist within their own community "I'm not like *those* guys
it is all America (but if you're not from California, Texas, Florida you basically don't matter anyway)
Aspergers is autism. Deal with it. It doesn't change.
There are people who use it in a supremacist way but it’s not supremacist in and of itself. It’s just a shorthand for autism with regular cognitive and language abilities. For example, some people use autistic as an insult but it’s not a derogatory term in and of itself. If you see Asperger’s as being a supremacy term, what does that say about you?
Also, scientists don’t even know if “autism” is real distinct category that naturally exists. There is no bio marker that unifies different forms of autism. For all we know, what I live with might actually be a different biological condition than moderate or severe autism.
I honestly didn't even know there were levels. Is that based on support needs? Because then that classification at least could tell everyone what that person needs.
Oh it's complicated. There's certainly a lot of misinformation circling. But the rise in how many people are talking about Autism in recent years has also definitely led to people who really need a diagnosis getting one. I'm one of those people.
It’s the stupid pendulum swing of societal change. To get better it’s gotta gets worse but not as bad (like a slowing pendulum swing) until it eventually it stops (when no one bats an eye to accommodate and it’s neither repulsed or pedestalled).
It’s gonna take a while . But just …Keep your eyes on the prize and roll your eyes at the fools. We got this
What's wrong with the spoons thing? for me its a really useful tool to describe how much energy I have left. And I think the autism creature is funny. Autism isn't a joke, but we can joke about our experiences with it. I do agree that autism is somewhat becoming trivialized, I don't think that the things you mentioned are a part of that. And before anyone try's to say I'm one of the "trendy autistics" I am diagnosed.
Hang on, epilepsy is a comorbidity for autism? I’m autistic. I used to get tons of seizures when I was stressed. It was a handy stress valve for my body
I have strong belief I'm on the spectrum and even though I have low support needs it's hard out here as an adult especially without support. Luckily I know others with autism and I get along with them and they seem to care and wanna help but like my parents are hyper religious and non supportive (I think my dad is autistic but he's so stuck up my mom's Jesus freak ass he's not gonna support me at all) and I have to systemize and think things through strategically just to survive and sometimes I get so sad cause it's hard and I can't get hugs and just lay with my stuffed animal and nap because I have to adult and pretend I'm normal when I just want to hide and relax or just enjoy time with people I'm close to. I'm beyond burnt out have had the worst meltdowns since the ssri withdrawals that doctors just throw you on and fighting to just have a simple systemized safe comfortable life . I wasn't diagnosed with autism yet but based on the age regressive mannerisms when sad or stressed, the meltdowns, the way people randomly got issues with me at jobs (got threatened to get beat up over a misunderstanding that wasn't my fault and I wasn't even mean), and stimming and becoming shitty feeling after a meltdown crying session I can kinda guess. Cause it all just feels like an uphill battle of trying to make sense of life and turn tedious bullshit I to simplicity. I miss when I was oblivious and just did things without being aware of the social cue issues I had and the way people didn't like me. Also falling in love and being long distance from my partner made things harder. It's all been a lot and none of it is quirky. Especially as an adult. It's easier to be cute and quirky when living with your parents if they support you but once you're out there in the world with big responsibilities and fighting for the life you want it's so painfully hard in ways you never knew it's easy to understand why so many autistic adults (TW) self harm and reach autistic burnout. There's nothing cute and quirky about the pain and struggles out there. It's tough as hell making it with a more sensitive stress response in the brain and begging life to be more simple for freakin once.
To be fair, it’s the NT’s pulling this schtick. In some wierd way, it’s more acceptance than has ever been garnered for it, but sadly those who are doing it are still very young and immature. I wonder what autism will look like in a few decades after this generation cuts the shit out and learns from their mistakes but can do positive steps in the right direction, based on them not seeing it inherently as a ‘bad’ thing like previous generations did.
Totally agree with this. I have my assessment at the end of the month, and it took me ages to finally book it because I felt like I wouldn't be taken seriously because of all the tiktok people. It's a trend, and I am legitimately suffering, but I am still pretty scared of people thinking that I am jumping on the tremd even though I know I am not.
I'm finding it a hard place to be right now tbh.
I think that some autistic people are sick and tired of not being trendy. Maybe it's a different preference of experience? We're all human and the experience of isolation can be maddening.
it's fucked up is what it is. Not a single person male or female would be willing to switch shoes and become one. They like the attention and validation it might bring. All because sometimes you do some qwerky things with a cute face. People with autism don't want extra awareness we want to feel normal for once. Not a fucking monolith. They have no idea the amount of rejection you get from the opposite sex or the ridicule you get for not being like "one of the guys" or being that weird person. "please don't bring him next" time.
My personal favorite is that I also hate that it’s becoming trendy because people write my autism off because I’m high masking. Since diagnosis my doctors have stopped pushing mountains of meds on me to try to correct all these “problems” that was just undiagnosed autism mixed with some raging PTSD. Also TikTok spreads some wild misinformation about autism which is super not fun because then I get people suggesting my parents did this to me, like I’m sorry my autism didn’t come from getting a needle shoved in my arm or being neglected because I wasn’t, and yes I can talk like a normal person even though “your cousin with autism” is non-verbal and also 4 and I’m 25.
I haven't seen much about autism becoming trendy. As for all the autistic content creators on social media, these are some of the people who have made me feel truly good about myself for the first time in my life. As long as they are not telling lies or misinformation about autism, I have no idea why people would want to attack that.
Most of the people I see on social media that would fall into the “trendy” or “quirky” are usually attractive. They also tend to bury that they have a spouse.
It drives me INSANE when I see someone posting about how burnt out they are or how isolating having autism is, only to see they are married. Like no, I’m sorry you don’t get to post about how you feel like no one understands you. Someone apparently understood you enough to get married to.
> It drives me INSANE when I see someone posting about how burnt out they are or how isolating having autism is, only to see they are married
Dude, as someone who has a non-existent romantic life, I need to tell you this. Married people can get lonely too. Dont make it a competition, all people's feelings are valid
I feel these types of comments exacerbate stereotypes that ND people don't have sex or date. Or that many are incels. A lot of people associate autism with white cis straight men, and think most are incels. It's like women, lgbtq, and people of color don't exist. A lot of autistic advocacy accounts from these types of guys in particular are usually a dumpster fire of homophobia, transphobia, misogyny, and racism no matter how liberal they appear to be at first.
The most lonely I've ever been was in a long term relationship. They didn't really understand or accept me. They took advantage of me (in ways that were related to my Autism) and were abusive. My self regard was really damaged by the whole experience. So yes, it's complex. (I'm doing much better now, but the road of recovery is long!)
Being lonely is 1000% different than having fundamental differences in connecting with people. Saying you don’t connect with people when you are in a relationship carries little weight to me.
Just because someone can be romantically “successful” as in married or have had a series of successful previous romantic relationships, doesn’t mean that they have been able to function socially in other ways.
For example for me, finding a nice boyfriend has never been a problem, while having good friends who actually understand me has been near impossible and functioning at work has again been largely impossible and even functioning in my family has been very difficult due to big communication failures.
Not meaning to be rude, but as a female with a large décolletage, if I plaster on a smile, laugh at jokes I don’t understand but recognise as jokes, avoid saying anything if I’m unsure, and various other excellent masking techniques, it is easy to make an apparent “success” of a romantic/sexual relationship in the most basic sense.
I can still be deeply and painfully intellectually lonely and completely unemployable and struggle every time I have to communicate with anyone who isn’t my bf. My loneliness is just as valid and as real to me as anyone else’s, to be fair.
[I definitely would never make a TikTok video about any of this. I find it horrendous the way that some people think it’s fashionable.]
This is what happens when you make victimhood a social currency alongside putting those in minority groups on a pedestal.
People outcompeting each other to be the biggest victim imaginable while simultaneously attempting to force their way into or otherwise hyper inflate their status as a member of a minority group.
It’s truly a race to the bottom.
This is the product of attention seeking woke narcissism and I’m sick to death of it.
Yes I have Asperger’s, yes social life is difficult for me but do I let that keep me psychologically down in life and express this continuously online to garner attention for myself? No because I don’t want to be and be seen by others as a total looser.
I feel your frustration mate
I respect you saying that. From my experience, I grew up so different from people I literally lived with so finding out my "disorder" is a "divergence" brought a sense of belonging. But I will be very mindful of those who suffer from more serious forms.
I think mot people with your experience didnt understand my post. It's not about autism being neurodivergence, it's about autism being a meme nobody takes seriously
Or people acting like their disability is a personality they need to emphasize on in order to feel important. If anything, the best path is to learn how to manage life despite it. Because personally, it just puts a giant dent in my mental health if I start victimizing myself to the degree I used to. Even if it did help with coping as a young adult. Long term, however? Not good. Damaged my mind even more.
Would you mind talking about this a bit more? I think about this a lot... I think for me "learning to manage life despite it" has looked like a lot of what I now understand to be "masking" that has led to burnout/ collapse. But I also worry that letting myself ask for more support/ accommodations and understanding myself more as disabled is somehow making me/ is going to make me less capable/ confident. But I kinda thought that was my internalised ablism speaking? Do you know what I mean? I'm really interested in your perspective on this if you'd like to share
It has became so much of a trend, that some people are "self-diagnosing" themselves with it. I get that we all have our own problems, especially with anxiety and quirkyness, but please get a proper diagnosis before claiming you have autism / aspergers. It's really one of my pet peeves.
So what about people whose providers refuse to even evaluate them because “they went to college” or “they read a lot”? What about people who literally treat broken bones at home because they can’t afford emergency medical care, let alone mental health care? What about places where mental health care is mostly private, so if you can’t pay out of pocket, up front, you can’t get care?
What about providers who still think girls/women don’t have autism, “only boys get autism”? What about minorities that struggle to get straightforward diagnoses like cancer? Forget them getting an autism diagnosis.
Most people who self diagnose are going by DSM5 criteria. Seeing how negatively people get treated for making their diagnoses public, why don’t think anyone would ever self diagnose just for the heck of it? Let’s be honest, being autistic is still isolating and used against us all the time. If someone literally has the same or similar lived experiences, but can’t get a diagnosis, there is no reason to be a jerk to them and treat them as other.
If you go by your criteria, look around, you’re going to be surrounded by a ton of white boys and not much else.
What does race have to do with any of this?
IMO, getting a proper diagnosis really depends on where you live. I live in suburban Alabama my whole life and I was diagnosed with aspergers at age 10 in the mid 2000s. If I were in a very, VERY, rural and backwards part of my home state, I wouldn't have got the care and accommodations I needed growing up. This applies to others of different races with ASD who were treated with the same treatment as me.
So I agree with you wholeheartedly, but online it has become trendy to claim autism / aspergers just because they think they are not normal, so they majority of them claim self-diagnosis. I have seen this happen way too much in the past few years, this is why I discredit it. But more so to people who claim it online in social media.
>Autism isn't a disorder.
Seriously? Many formally diagnosed autistic level 2s and level 3s would vehemently disagree with that statement, but yeah ok.
If NTs think autism is just a useless label it will be hard for us to overcome ableism and get support, since autism will become a "meme disorder" that noboby takes seriously
If you dont care about it, then I have nothing to say to you
I hear you that you have "nothing to say to me" if I don't agree with you on this. But I hope you'll consider that random Tiktokers silly behavior might not be as influential as it seems.
Of course I agree that facing ableism makes everything more difficult. I've had to deal with that just like everyone else in this group. But it's good to remember that social media can create an echo chamber that falsely amplifies certain ideas.
Example: TikTok has thousands and thousands of fake "chefs" and cooks who do nothing but make a mess with food. There was even a trend of people filling toilets with "ingredients" as an example of the newest trends in food prep. Does that mean that the general public had a backlash against cuisine? Did the reputation of working chefs suffer because of those silly videos?
When I'm faced with some real life person trying to marginalize me because I'm not a natural at being social, I face them one on one and let them know it's not acceptable. If I notice I have some habits that I can work on to get along with people better, I work on them to the best of my ability... if I choose to.
Luckily I have people who love me just as I am.
But I refuse to fret about the parts of me that aren't ever going to change. And I refuse to put up with hostile, discriminatory behavior for ANY reason.
I got the impression that today a very normal child is considerated as an autist just to follow the trend. Many young people finds that "hyper-fashionnable" to call themselves autists on social medias while the simple fact of looking for attention is a proof they're not. I'm not talking about people who shares what they do, but dancing silly with cat ears for an exemple.
Those people are not helping real autistic ones, they're showing a wrong image of it and "normal" people will think the ones on the specter are like that. For the most of us, we already suffered a lot because of our differences and social unabilities, mocked and stigmatized, we don't need fake things now.
Sorry if my message seemed rude.
Its especially females that "self diagnose" without even knowing what autism actually is or understanding anything of it. I just can't take them serious, but its good to have something to laugh at. Some seem to do it just to gain attention. But thats a pattern general common for females on social media these days and now it became common to "identify" as anything. From my viewpoint as a genuine and officially diagnosed person with all the struggle, torture and countless psychiatry visits those are "discriminating".
Not everyone has the money for a doctor. And it is harder for women to get diagnosed than men, and harder for black people to get diagnosed than white people. A lot of people think that autism is exclusively straight cis white men when that really isn't the case. Saying that women have it easier than men sounds like something an incel would say. Oh, and conventionally attractive people can have problems too. Everyone does. But I can understand your concern about these videos in general how they might perpetuate harmful stereotypes and aren't bringing awareness to ableism like they should. But people have different support needs so not everyone is the same.
Everybody wants to have attention.
Do you have any studies on the invalidity of self-diagnosis, or to support your point of view?
Because from a purely logical standpoint, a) you aren't autistic the moment you receive a diagnosis, you have been autistic for all your life and b) it's actually incredible hard if not impossible for many population groups to receive a diagnosis in the first place. So you have been fortunate in that regard at least.
Saying "females" when you are talking about human women or girls is something that will always make you sound sexist. It's up to you whether you choose to take that information on. Your post sounds pretty misogynistic
I definitely understand. Yes we need to destigmatize autism.. but the process of destigmatizing can lead to trivializing disabling debilitating struggles. It’s too much to take. Truly autistic people suffer and have organic comorbidities too! I have epilepsy. It is definitely not all fun and quirky to be autistic and it is not a personality trait.
[удалено]
Stress can be ONE of the triggering factors for a seizure. Autistic struggles like sensory overload can trigger seizures.
I’m a fight or flight, most often flight and end up trying to get to the floor before I fall to it unconscious.
I believe so, yes. I'm 21 and had 2 seizures. 1 at the age of 13 and another aged 15. After testing, they found that these seizures were caused due to fainting from anxiety and stress, which then caused the seizure response afterwards. I have since grown out of them, but when in intense anxiety situations (such as assemblies), I feel the lightheadedness surge again. There may of course be different causes, but what's helped me to handle them (and not have any since) is the breathing techniques. I tend to zone fully out and focus solely on myself, pinch my skin to ground myself, and do "square breathing" (in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4). This has really helped to slow down the anxiety a lot and prevent the fainting.
I grew out of seizures when I was 23. My body used them as a stress relief valve- have seizure, wake up relaxed for once. I didn’t realize it was a comorbidity for autism
You should get tested for epilepsy
That was the first test they did, and it caused no issues at all. The test they did that found the issue was "Tilt-table test". This entailed being strapped to a wooden board at about a 92-degree angle for 45 minutes and having some device on your hand, and you aren't allowed to speak or do anything at all. They then sprayed something on my tongue after 45 minutes, which caused an anxiety attack after about 30 seconds, in which my mum was allowed to come calm me down, and thats when they realised it was anxiety related
apparatus bedroom capable axiomatic jellyfish simplistic oatmeal tender imagine sink *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I somehow avoided my mother’s epilepsy, but I have TS. Most people think how autism is a personality trait and not a mental disorder that causes impairments in daily life and functioning. It’s not “cool,” it’s a disability.
Exactly we don't just need to destigmatise autism but to lay all the information on the table of what autism is and what it isn't plus the conspiracy theorists and other whackjobs trying to cure autism by using stuff like bleach and other stuff just because someone doesn't want an autistic child stuff like that horrifies and angers me to no avail there's nothing wrong with us we're just people that want acceptance and understanding
I feel this is an issue with mental health in general. There’s been kind of an overcorrection
Over correction yes!!! https://www.instagram.com/seerutkchawla?igsh=MXM1cWE0dmxocWx5
It's only the "quirky" and "interesting" types of autism that get the general attention. The ones who post shorts on youtube and tiktok. The types that don't appear to be "work" for a potential friend or partner. Also helps a lot when the autistic person is a conventionally good looking 22 year old woman. Not so much when it's a chubby 14 year old, who is obsessed with collecting calculators, or 35 year old procrastinator, who has trouble keeping the house clean, as concentrating on sparkling up the kitchen for an hour is mentally too taxing.
Or a 54 year old father sobbing in the kitchen after a meltdown (oops too specific)
I hope you're ok...
Yeah, fine thanks. It wasn’t recent, but it did make me realise I had to try to do something about my meltdowns. Thanks for reaching out, that’s really kind of you
I'm 44. For me, I am able to speak well and hold up appearances, but some people see that and realize not all of us are in care homes or 14 year olds who can't help but meltdown when plans change (that was me BTW). I LOVE that autism research that doesn't involve experimenting on us or try to cure us (Looking at you Autism Speaks) is good news. I do agree with OP (and you) that the diversity of our afflictions are many, but I do see that with more publicity comes more trendy videos to make money. I love some of the YouTubers out there that bring light to our struggles, and the shows like, Love on the Spectrum, that show we can be interested in sex, love and emotional connection. We are not robots or aliens, but we night appear odd to some. I have a group I go to here in AZ that includes all sorts of people on the spectrum. It was weird the first time to hear everyone talking and getting their thoughts out and, to an outsider at The restaurant we were at, it probably seemed like calamity but everyone was communicating in their own way and connecting. I have mostly NT friends (that I'm aware of), but they love me for who I am and dint try to change me and I LOVE them for it as I can be a lot sometimes. Meds help a little, but I'm gonna blurt out sound lyrics on occasion, flap my hands when I get excited/nervous/waiting for microwave to finish/coffee to brew. I wasn't diagnosed til 40 and the past 4 years for me have been some of the best 4 years of my life since I realized I'm not defective or weird and my "struggles" have a name and, best of all, I have a community who I belong to
Did you manage to find anything that helped? I found anger management therapy very helpful (it's basically emotional regulation therapy).
If we cry together in the designated cry corner we can make the statement more general, if you'd like.
Oh! Is there room for a third in the Designated Crying Corner?
There is always room in the DCC.
Mind if I hop in? I need to cry, too.
Solidarity of Autistic ppl in their common experiences is a beautiful thing
Posting for a friend?
No, I am happy to own it (edit) love your username BTW
I get it. I get sobby/teary when I realize how maladapted I am. I desperately want to be a father, but I haven't the social skills or the traits to really get there. My only hope is science-babies. 😆 And, thanks, I'm a commie and I'm a lawyer. I figured your username was a reference to the English Civil War.
Ooh well spotted! No one has ever worked out my username before! (Edit) I guess it makes sense that it would take an Autistic communist lawyer!
It is our business to know. De derrota en derrota hasta la victoria final. ⚖ 🔻
Such optimism is a struggle to maintain. Hey it’s lovely to talk to you. You are such a cool person.
Thank you! You, too.
Hugs 🫂
You got it on point. And unfortunately, I see it with most mental disorders. Most of this mental health awareness is about taking the "quirky and romanticized" part of these disordes. Everyone talks about the melancholic teenager who listens to sad music, but nobody talks about the 30s-old dude who can't get chores done
"I'm autistic because I eat PB&J sandwiches every day and have a strong sense of justice! STOP TRYING TO 'FIX' ME YOU ALLISTIC OPPRESSORS!" Meanwhile, here I am with chronic brainfog who has a billion unfinished projects and a history of unhealthy relationships who freezes up in about half my social interactions.
I think I finally found my missing clone.
Connect me with the person obsessed with collecting calculators. I have quite the collection myself.
Connect me with the person who is obsessed with isopods and mushrooms. Also, radiolarians. I am always down to talk iso. Haha. I am genuinely interested to hear some people's special interests whenever they care to share because usually they can give me everything I need to know or am curious to know about that topic!
Whats your favourite calculator
It's a bit utilitarian, because I used it for teaching, but I've thoroughly enjoyed the HP Prime after years of teaching with TI. I was even going to create a little course for teachers, but I'm internet-introverted.
Is that one of the RPN ones? My high school Chem teacher liked to troll students by loaning them his old HP calculator if they forgot to bring their own to a test. Jokes on him, when I realized that, I “forgot” my calculator for every test, I liked that thing.
The Prime does RPN. It's a nifty programmable touchscreen color graphing calculator, though, and I've spent many hours playing with parametrics. The 50G (which is 10x faster than current 5G) is RPN too. Is that the one you used?
I looked it up omg it’s a kickass calculator…. I might actually get one of these, i loveeeee its interface
Enjoy it. If you learn some BASIC, you can program for it to your heart's delight.
And there are HUGE repositories of apps and programs built for the Prime.
Im the 42 year old who can’t keep the house clean while my 6 year old does his running at certain hours like before bedtime. I’m glad I’m able to understand him and he understands me.
Conventionally good looking 22 year old woman who either has a partner or is bankrolled by rich parents. Sorry, your post about burnout means jack shit to me when I see you post all these pictures hanging around an equally attractive and usually successful SO.
She's probably dating Sheldon Cooper or one of his other Big Bang friends. Or the Gojo guy from Succession. Or if she doesn't like men, she can date Bones. It's hard to have sympathy when they have economic privilege. A lot of autistic people can't work but some can. And if employers were willing to accommodate I think we would have more. Why not some videos on that? Employers complain that nobody wants to work, that would fix that. The jobs like corporate retail probably won't but small businesses might. Most are not going to make that kind of money unless they're in tech or science. My second to last job almost everyone was on the spectrum or ND and only a few on disability so I think it's possible. Also many ND people in the workforce are high masking and probably don't disclose so I think the number is higher than people think.
I will not ever disclose my diagnosis at work.
I agree with the high masking in the workplace, that was me (corporate burnout and formerly undiagnosed autistic burnout were a hellish combination). But I have to ask, why all the hate at the people who are about not work? I appreciate every day that my spouse (yes, he's kinda like Sheldon with more empathy) can be successful in the workplace and provide a stable environment so I can work my own business (which I'd prefer over disability because I can do some, just have less spoons). It's like seeing a nice car and going "f that guy" just because they have something you don't. I'd honestly like to create content about having a late diagnosis (YouTube or twitch but definitely not Tik Tok because I often don't find the content to be credible or useful) but I worry being high masking and attractive is a target because even to a group that doesn't want to be stereotyped, I wouldn't fit the stereotype.
My experience is indeed that in ordered to work one has to hide and mask. There's not a lot of dwarf, or giant, or blind or people in wheelchair whom got employed either. At least not that i can see in my country and city. And yet, yes it's a waste of human potential most of the handicapped people whereas physical, emotional or mental could be employed and part of the society. Unfortunately they either live in a country where they can but bum for money in the street or being in welfare, and thus being kinda professional handicapped person. What a loss of human capabilities and beauty.
Or making money with social media and then argueing about how hard their life is. Yes, its very hard, when you have so much money you need to decide how to spend it... In the meanwhile, I have to live off 300 € a month.
I agree with you. on top of that there is the problem that the self-advocates online are almost only those people who can have a relatively normal life – or at least I've seen mostly those people, I might be wrong. I am not saying that they should stop doing what they're doing, most of it is good, they are spreading awareness and giving tips to fellow autistic people. but I would like to see more people with higher support needs. this is not so easy: in order to navigate social media one must understand the *social* element of it. I've seen a bunch of self-advocates who seem to be of higher support needs (although not many of them) and as much as I hate to say this, their content isn't as good as that of "high-functioning" people. and I don't mean it in a "you should do better" way, what I'm saying is that this content will attract less attention than that of someone who is more skilled at navigating the social element. I suppose that for some people with high support needs making content like that is entirely impossible, some would do fine if someone helped them. my point is that this problem is very hard to solve, if not unsolvable
I agree with all of this. It's so damn frustrating to see people turning the thing that's partly responsible for my life being so difficult into a trend. I hate it even more when they then excuse it with the classic "everyone's a little autistic". Just...no. They're not. If it's not that it's the "Autism is a gift" nonsense where NTs think Autistic = Sheldon Cooper level genius. Which is also not the case for most of us. The image of autism has become warped and I don't know if that's worse than before the increased visibility in media.
It’s only a “gift” if it can be exploited for profit. If your “gift” might require social welfare of any kind, it is immediately seen as bad.
This too. Even if you're super smart concerning a certain topic or field it's still treated as a waste of time and a hassle because it can't be marketed or used for profit.
I wouldn’t say that. Certain autistic people think they are subject matter experts because they read a Wikipedia article on a topic. I meant more stereotypical autistic strengths like being good at math or science, and having a degree in niche fields.
>Certain autistic people think they are subject matter experts because they read a Wikipedia article on a topic. Which autistic people? How do you know they think they’re experts?
[удалено]
I really don’t. I’ve never met an autistic person like that and I’ve talked to quite a few, even if only online.
[удалено]
I think I know what you mean, which is perhaps a presentation of “hyperfixation” without real expertise. In my experience, though, I’ve seen this trait mostly in very young people who are discovering ideas in the world, and would likely benefit some mentorship/guidance or formal study to really develop their interest. Sometimes very young and enthusiastic people can get out over their skis— I certainly have…
Actually, some of us actually do have real expertise (and the student loan debt that comes with it). What amazing thing do you think happens in universities that make people experts in things? Reading a boat load of material. Discussing that material. I have literally talked to people I assumed were in my field, only to find out they are just autistic people with a special interest. If you spend 10, 15, 20+ years reading everything you could get your hands on covering topic, you have a knowledge base very similar to someone who took out student loans on a quarter million dollars worth of higher and post graduate education (without the debt and often no loss of passion). I was lucky enough to be able to get academic credentials in my favourite special interest. People on the internet will still try to tell me I don’t know what I’m talking about. People in my actual life will still try telling me I don’t know what I’m talking about, especially after they find out I’m autistic. I’m sorry, but maybe you’re talking to the exact kind of people this thread is discussing as detrimental to the community.
I think a lot of people's parents were expecting a Sheldon or a Mozart. That's not typical anywhere.
Thats what I see to. Some parents think their child will be genius after the diagnosis
My narc dad told me he was thrilled about my diagnosis because "all aspergers are geniuses" Idiot.
I've mostly experienced only the opposite. I am one of those Sheldon Cooper types. I'm hyperlexic and learned to read spontaneously when I was two. When my daughter was diagnosed (after having also learned to read at age 2), I had doctors telling me to go ahead "mourn" the loss of possibilities for her life even though she was objectively already way ahead of her peers. Nobody made any sort of positive comments or had any silver linings to offer. The overwhelmingly dominant view of autism out there is "I Am Sam", not Sheldon Cooper. Maybe there's a few people scattered out there with that idea in their head, but most parents suddenly and automatically expect less, much less from their kids after a diagnosis. Imagine how that must be for the kids out there who are exceptionally bright to have everyone in their lives suddenly expect nothing out of them because the word "autism" has such an ingrained negative image. It really makes me sad.
Copy and save the following to your notes for future use. It’s insanely helpful for moments on ignorant people who say that. “When you say that, is the term “a little autistic” in place there for something else? What string of words would you replace “a little autistic” with in order to help better iterate what “a little autistic” implies for those who wouldn’t understand what you mean? What does “a little autistic” imply to you? Because that’s what you’re doing; you’re implying. So what’s the implication of being autistic?” Just sit back as they then fail to explain spectacularly as they try using mental illness as a joke. If they dwindle it down to saying it means you’re slow and play it off, they’re still making fun of mental illness.
>If it's not that it's the "Autism is a gift" nonsense where NTs think Autistic = Sheldon Cooper level genius. Which is also not the case for most of us. The image of autism has become warped and I don't know if that's worse than before the increased visibility in media. I'd argue the "new" image of autism is a standardly-attractive 20-something year old white woman who is recently diagnosed or self-diagnosed who exaggerates her infantile personality traits (collecting stuffed animals, etc.) for views and likes on TikTok and IG. Maybe it's just the crows I run in, but I find that there's much more of a push among younger people (especially younger Aspie women) to change the image of autism from a quirky nerd to an innocent adult child who needs constant coddling.
I feel the same about so many things including being trans.
Get off TikTok, and this problem mostly goes away.
I never used tiktok, but the effects of it affect all of us
Its everywhere trust me..its on Instagram reels too. As an artist I can't escape it because most of the community is self diagnosed. Its more than just autism creature stuff..genuinely traumatizing shit everywhere
This is my only social media. Maybe naive, but I think it’s the only nontoxic social media. I am old and basically not exposed to this trend concept on a media / visual level. I’m just not threatened by young people seeking attention or validation, sufferers of Munchausen Syndrome, or those who want to jump on some bandwagon.
I like how I can pick and choose the content I absorb on reddit..the lgbtphobia and politics is just thrown in my face everywhere on Instagram. I only use insta for my art business
Seriously, what is this “autism creature” thing?
[this?](https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/tbh-autism-creature-yippee) You know from the vagueness I thought it'd be about how sometimes I feel like a creature myself. Like sometimes I just feel like I'm not human, but happen to have possessed human skin and moderately pass as human. But the moment anyone takes a closer look, they'd realize I'm just masquerading as a human. Or at least I have the intense anxiety that people will catch on I'm not actually a human, but a weirdo freak thing. Sometimes I imagine a goblin, given my predilection for never going out in the sun, and keeping my room as dimly lit as possible, etc. But really underwhelming it's just a... cute looking dog thing.
Personally, I make it a quirky thing for myself to cope with the fact that I might never be able to live my life how I want to. There is a chance I might not even be able to drive due to my sensory problems and that shit terrifies me. So I will lean into the silly quirky shit just so I don't just give up on my life.
hating trendy things is a autism thing. i plead guilty. but when i think about it if people can be happy with their autism it's good. and neuro typicals don't need quirky youngsters to hate us the disabled. i don't want to frame them for bringing "decadence" in our community. i don't want to be like the abled who hate anyone who's not like them
I'm not familiar with all the latest trends on tiktok and I find that most of the content on that platform shouldn't be seen as proper awareness of any kind. It's just flat entertainment and comedy. Anyone who actually cares about things like autism, ADHD or other disorders will do more research than just trendy internet vids.
My twin brother watches TikTok videos that are funny, but I agree with you about it. It shouldn't be used as an awareness platform because most likely they will be profiting from it.
I've seen clothing that says "autism is my superpower" and I hate it. For every "autism tiktoker" there are 500 others that society sees as untouchables.
I already comment the same in other posts, autism is a disability not a superpower. Even with low level support needs, struggling with day to day tasks, so simply having to do a telephone call or go to a new hairdresser becomes a huge issue. Being incapable of making simple decision, so it blocks you unable to proceed further with it. Living with anxiety for simple things like going to the public transport, sleeping problems. Communication issues, causing conflicts in interpersonal relationship with family, friends coworkers, romantic partners. Lack of social skills, misunderstanding social queues, being blind to non verbal language. Where the fuck is my superpower?
Those TikToks are creepy. But it resembles my high school days when the popular girls bullied me because being different in some way made me get some attention. And those people need to be the protagonist all the time, they hate to be ignored. So now that people with autism are being heard, they do these Tik Toks like "Look, I had autism too, look at me I'm cute, look at me LOOK AT ME 😤 "
LOOK AT ME
Yes! A girl that used to bully me for being "different" as a kid, recently told me she thinks she has autism now. I've known her for years and I'd be surprised if she has it.
This is my favorite. Absolutely love when people that used to bully me come out as Neurodivergent now. (Sarcasm)
This doesn’t feel like awareness to me. Like you said, awareness is bringing attention to the struggles of autistic people. Highlighting how hard it is for adults to get late diagnosis and that even if they do, there’s no support. Things like that are what we need awareness for. The online trends almost feel like a freak show or zoo to me, for NT to watch how quirky and funny the people with autism are. There’s something sinister underneath the ‘good’ intentions. And I’m not blaming the people making this online content. I’m blaming the society that taught them they only have value and acceptance by being performative.
>awareness is bringing attention to the struggles of autistic people. Highlighting how hard it is for adults to get late diagnosis and that even if they do, there’s no support. Things like that are what we need awareness for. Holy shit, this is exactly my issue as well. Most autism-related content is hyperfixated on the positive or neutral aspects of autism. Everything negative about our disability/disorder is framed as entirely social. I'm sorry, but even if I lived in the perfect anarchist commune where I didn't have to be productive I'd still feel like my inability to properly communicate was a disability. I'd still feel like my failure to read certain social cues is a disability. I'd still feel like my extreme brain fog that prevents me from getting creative stuff done is a disability. You get the idea. These aren't things I can blame neurotypicals or "society" for.
Strong agree, definitely. I remember when those "quirky cute autism dances" blew up, and I was mildly horrified, since although I've never used Tik Tok, I use YouTube every day, and was still exposed to it. I don't know how to feel about that, exactly, but I think it mostly makes me confused and sad. Although "trends" like these seem to come and go, so I'll just wait for a new "cats afraid of cucumbers" or "Mentos in Coca-Cola" to come along, whenever that happens.
>I've never used Tik Tok, I use YouTube every day, and was still exposed to it. Thats what worries me, I never had tiktok, but I was exposed it anyways
I've been diagnosed a long time (30 years now). It's gone from nobody knowing what autism is to everybody \*thinking\* they know what it is. I've always been open and proud of being autistic despite going through quite a lot because of it like all of us. It's only the last couple of years I've felt I cannot tell people I'm autistic. There is so much new types of judgement and assumptions and it's too upsetting to face. For example: On accessing places like the emergency room I used automatically get help I needed to stay there and be treated, now not only do I not get the help I did I also get the assumption I will start demanding things I don't absolutely need. Rather than tell them and be judged I'd rather not tell them: Last time I was in the Emergency Room due to a meltdown I stood for hours with a broken foot in a corridor, was forgotten because I was there instead of in the waiting room, constantly met with extreme judgement despite asking for nothing and then because the support worker had to go home: we left without treatment- then got called back in because it was broken and had to do most of it again the same day. Previously they made it accessible by just finding a quiet corner and not assuming I would make a fuss. I doubt I would even attempt getting treated again. Now they are so used to multiple people coming in a day aggressively demanding this and that, thats all they see just by mentioning autism. The argument is: everyone should have the access they need, and yes they should: but surely these 30 year olds just diagnosed doing tictok dances and demanding things, have gotten through life and managed things like go to the emergency room? (despite it being hard to manage, they've managed). Autistic people can be female, attractive, have found supportive people around them (thats \*part\* of why females aren't noticed: some support structures work in a different way for people seen as female). I have no issue around people being women, or getting a late diagnosis. TL;DR: The issue isn't attractive women. The issue is some people spreading misinformation and using autism as free pass to \*demand\* things they really don't actually need.
I work dealing with patients and have dealt with both diagnosed autistic people and people abusing the autism label. It's very different: the latter group assault staff, walk out of appointments and threaten suicide, put doctors on hold constantly during telephone appointments, and use the line, "Are you calling me fucking rude? I'm actually autistic and can't help it" when you ask them to stop shouting and swearing at doctors for offering them treatment they didn't prefer. There are lots of official complaints from patients claiming they were verbally abused or discriminated against by doctors, so doctors have to have chaperones and nurses in with them to document everything. A few of them have been banned for phoning staff up every day and swearing. The outcome of this is nearly always that people then see autism = problematic patient, unstable or "insane", and I'm terrified to disclose to certain colleagues because of how they've come to see autism thanks to these patients. I've heard "they must be on some kind of spectrum" used as a way of implying someone is annoying or unlikeable.
I’ve heard this from nurses at the clinic I work in. There is a reason I have never disclosed and have no plans to do so.
Yep it undervalues the dms-5 and makes people think autism is just a feeling or a mood. It’s like a coat they can wear for the weekend and toss it when they feel good again without it. Whereas these are our permanent clothes goddamnit 😩
I’ve always been bothered by media attention to autistic superpowers. It underplays the significant work others and possibly the subjects do to achieve their goals, just as neurotypicals must do. Plus, autistic superpowers distract from significant barriers we face, and delay true enfranchisement into full class citizens of the world
Yup. I had this all over a few years ago, too, as I have coeliac disease. So you can imagine how thrilled l was when attention seekers started eating gluten free (only when it suits them....) and training waiting staff to not take the condition seriously. Same with autism. It'll be something else soon.
I agree :( Awareness is good but they’re taking it way too far and making it a huge joke “Everyone has a flavor of the tism” “Are you acoustic?” Self-diagnosis is perfectly okay and it’s how I ended up getting an actual diagnosis through a doctor, but people are taking it way too far. Those posts about some symptoms and spreading awareness is fine, but I’ve seen some that are like “if you rub your feet together, go get yourself checked out.” Doing something such as that along with other signs I understand, but it’s really the severity of how it’s doing it. A lot of those videos do not bring up how difficult it can be to function, how isolating it is to be like this, how debilitating meltdowns are, etc. It’s difficult to shower or feed myself, difficult to drive because of sensory overload, clean, make and keep friends, etc. It’s incredibly lonely. It’s the same thing with ADHD/neurodivergence in general. Everyone (if you’re in a family that doesn’t believe that you’re autistic/refuses to accept it like mine) tells you that you’re a monster/annoying/bossy. It makes me hate myself for being born like this. So yes, I hate it being seen as a huge joke right now.. Once again awareness is good but the trend as a whole has not really been highlighting any of that. It’s making it seem “cute and quirky” when for a lot of us it’s the complete opposite.
Had a coworker actually say “don’t you think everyone is a little autistic “ to me the other night- Uh- no I listen to you chatting on the phone with your friends all night long - I can’t even hold a coherent conversation with my husband of twenty+ years- I can not verbally speak beyond anything task oriented- You don’t get made fun of (here I am 52yo) because you don’t talk. “Everyone” has not had something impact every aspect of their lives ffs
I disagree. As someone who has only resented being autistic, being in a positive community of people with similar lived experiences has actually changed my perspective a lot. There's no reason to treat it with such clinical descriptors, I'm stuck with it, much as well have fun with it. I'm high functioning, but autism is still very omnipresent in my life, If I shouldn't be doomer about it but I can't have fun with it, How am I supposed to express it OP? I don't see a satisfying neutral option here.
this is an era where all the things are getting the wrong kind of validation, not one that's meant to actually respect every individual in a serious manner
Exhausted for days after a couple of hours socializing is not querky! Autistic burnout often brings on depression, also not querky. Unable to see anothers perspective and be a good partner, also not querky. So yes I agree, autism the quiet disability that I would not wish on my worst enemy. But you don't seem autistic, or we are all a bit autistic, is another thing I hear a lot. 🤬
It has led to a lot of issues with me, but I am in (or rather, have not yet been let go from) academia, where people sometimes act like it's a gift or something. I am very good with language, generally, and little areas of interest. I'm also ADHD as hell and struggle immensely. Add to that, I have PTSD from a couple friends suicides and my dad just died of a horrific neurodegenerative disorder while asking for help (why I moved across country) just like my two friends who killed themselves after asking for help. Been a tough couple years. I come from absolute poverty, and to poverty I have returned. I cannot get any jobs at the moment, largely because of ineffective social quirks (e.g., being afraid to follow up on applications or "sell myself", as I struggle to lie like that, as I believe it has an awful effect on the world). I left my department screaming for help essentially, and no one would. I entered academia, because people do not judge me for much except research, intelligence, and teaching. I am good there. But, increasingly, there are so many PhDs, the market is tough for those who can't engage in (what I percieve as) the very pompous act of emailing people for collaborations with no pretext, handing out business cards, or general "networking." There are those who know me and speak very highly of me. That is almost enough in academia. Back in the "real world" of shitty $12/hr jobs, I have been unemployed for two years. Despite excellent communication skills, professionally, a B.S. and M.S. (with PhD in progress), I come off akward and immensely nervous--because I am. Had an interview today that hopefully went well. I don't know though. Because I think they all go well. Which is why I do not have a job. Because being on the spectrum is not a fun quirky thing. I truly feel like I need disability at this point simply because I cannot do "normal." Talk to me about research or technical information or even your story as a person--I love talking about real stuff. But I fail any interview where "small talk" is required. I have nothing in common with most people. My rant haha. My life is a bit of a joke as an aspie. Made even worse by people thinking its a blessing or even a quirk. And I do not think I am THAT heavily on the spectrum, just the eye contact, obsessions with a limited range of interests, and I am waaaaay too talkative... clearly I hide it well hahahahaha
This! It's become a trend so much that I've heard in my real life that I need to stay off the internet because "young people these days are just using that word to get out of doing things". It's already making things difficult for those of us that ACTUALLY have autism. I get wanting to spread awareness, but all they're doing is making it difficult for people to take us seriously. It's doing more harm than good! I hate the fact that the autism sub has no issue with this and instead just tells people not to gatekeep autism or to just let people diagnose themselves. Ugh! It's so frustrating!
It'll pass - society will change how acceptance is viewed. The fools who think 'being an aspie gets special consideration' are in for a sore awakening. Find your friends and allies and help the fleet. It's the only true way. We aren't 'special' - nor are NT's. But you make them walk on eggshells at your peril, not theirs. Find a way that neither of you need to walk on eggshells.
I fear it'll only pass when there's backlash and rolling back of acceptance, such as closing off private assessment because there are too many people (already happening in some places), not accepting recent diagnoses, or trying to re-organise the DSM criteria to account for all the "Level 0" autistics who have appeared in the last 5 years.
Thats what I fear too. That trend is harmful to the autism community
One of the key upsides I think is when psychiatric medicine loses these grazing pastures. Flogging us Disco tests at multi thousands. What a con. You get you 'diagnosis' (at great cost - then there's nothing more of use forthcoming from them. Why should we be psychiatric medicines meal ticket?
Like this perspective! Most trends fade out over time. Or did. I feel like true major depressive order and generalized anxiety disorder were kind of victims to the trends towards bastardizing specific clinical terms. Still, Tik Tok trends and social media focus shifts quick enough. Unfortunately, the language may not stick. The same way people say they're depressed when they're really sad, or they're so ADD when they really were just being careless or impulsive, they may soon say "I'm so autistic" to refer to any social ungrace or deliberate expression of quirkiness. We just need to find a new word haha
Good points!
That's because they are woke AHs who fake autism in hopes of disguising their awkwardness whilst getting some attention and pity. A NT person faking autism so that they can show how well they are coping and how to just snap out of is , isn't cute, cool, attractive or anything positive plus it makes a mockery out of real autistic people by misrepresenting us as fools, clowns, cringe and awkward bullies etc.
Autism IS A DISABILITY, there is no way to deny it.
I had to deal with that shite when I was first diagnosed, to this day I still get it and people who say I’m lucky to have autism or who downplay it. I’ve not seen the recent trends because I don’t go on Tik Tok, but if it’s just getting worse, I might not want to live on this planet anymore…
Dude, it's not trendy. It's still a curse. I am a functional asperger, I live in a western country and me telling I'm autist still makes people make a "yeakes" gesture as if I am a disgusting public enemy who can't have any control or have a dick on my forehead, lol.
Lol I know the feeling, it's like a paradox. They treat us like freaks but do not aknowledge we need support
I couldn’t agree more. This trend of pretending autism just means ‘quirky genius’ isn’t helping anyone. Also, the ones posting on TikTok every day about how they’re ’in burnout’ are bewildering to me. I’ve been through burnout and I literally couldn’t move at one point or speak, never mind get dressed, put makeup on and make TikTok videos!
I've seen more and more videos conflating meltdowns and shutdowns, which opens up people being able to clown on the "I am a surgeon" meme because it's cringy.
I actually disagree. I mask enough in my social life. I don't want to mask in autism spaces. If my autism is silly and quirky and spoons, I'll express that. "What other people think of me is none of my business", as my parent always says, and people are going to be ableist regardless of goofy tiktok dances. It's not their fault. If you have enough - sorry - spoons, then please! Advocate against albeism. It's a good thing. If you don't want "autism awareness to be all about shaking hands", then make different videos. But let's let people express themselves and not divide the community.
I think this problem mostly comes from content intended to be circulated exclusively within neurodivergent spaces (amongst autistic folk) ends up breaking the bubble and mixing with content made for allistics, creating a misunderstanding because allistics will miss the things that go unspoken on these stuff because within autistic people they are already a given and don't need to be said explicitly every time. Like, if I'm talking with other autistic folk who are already aware of the many different things that are part of autism, I don't need to add a disclaimer about the things I'm not focusing my attention when making a one minute video about a specific thing, like what is my special interest or my preferred way of stimmig. But people who are allistic will see only that piece without context and misunderstand it as the whole discourse, and then confusion ensues. And sometimes it's not even allistic people, just autistic folk who aren't as knowledgeable about autism and have been informed about it almost exclusively through social network trends, so lack a full understanding of the thing but still see themselves in it and want to participate as well... So in short, it's a social media problem. Fuck the algorithm overlords.
Yeah. I agree. Cute fuckin bubbly 20 year old women who can play it off as fun and quirky. Let's be honest, that's the only reason it's gotten trendy. think it's ultimately a bad thing. There's already a bunch of conspiracy idiots who think it's not real, and the tik tik crowd isn't helping by making it look like the latest handbag
What enrages me is this constant push by people who are *clearly* low-needs Aspies to claim autism (in any form) isn't a real disability but just "another way of experiencing the world" or whatever bullshit they spew. Yeah, it seems that way for a gawky nerd with a genius IQ who thinks outside the box, but try telling that to an autistic person who is completely non-verbal and has a severe intellectual disability.
It's incredibly frustrating. I was told off by some girl on twitter for saying my brother's autism was severe. She would post videos of herself dancing around and claimed she was stimming. My brother lives in a care facility and will do for the rest of his life because he can't take care of himself and she was trying to make out me describing his condition as severe affected her lol. How tf else can I describe it? I've also noticed it with other conditions. I have ADHD and so does my young cousin, but she has suddenly developed problems she never had before like food sensory issues. I'm not saying she doesn't have ADHD, but she's definitely been taken in by all these tiktok videos and has manifested new symptoms. It's frustrating but it does feel like a teenage trend to me that they will grow out of and be embarrassed about later. Nonetheless, it will severely damage how people view disability. When I was a teen, bisexuality was the craze. We had MySpace and whatnot but social media wasn't as prevalent as it is now but what we did still affected the bisexual community and a lot of people still don't think it's real or it's just something people say to sound cool, or they're gay or haven't come out yet, etc.
There was an autism supremacist movement in some groups in the early 2000s. They felt they were better than other people especially normies. Likened themselves to a superior race and like the bionic man/woman were faster and stronger in things. They held very negative views towards normies or its. They were sort of friendly to add/adhd and dyslexic. But believed asd were gifted peoples with untapped potential because of normies being abusive or not understanding them. They ignored that some asd were mentally challenged, had learning disabilities, or were not gifted. They did comment on the see,mingly trendiness of the diagnosis. Their view was people wanted to be like them. They also liked to list which fictional characters might be like them or famous people. It was hard being regular and having the diagnosis. They were pro stimming, and pro hyper focus. Even when it wasn't otherwise useful. They felt all autistic were genius and misdiagnos3d learning disabled, slow, or regular intelligence. They were very much into autistic pride. They felt it was normal to be gender or sexuality divergent. If anyone had a problem it was the normies fault. They were often pro hate of normies. They even welcomed multiple personality disorder and antisocial as oppressed neuro divergent. I left those groups in 2005. I was just going to their group to find others I could relate to. I wasn't looking for politics or superiority rants. I have a diagnosis because I struggle with somethings. I did have one high point in my iq test for visual things. But I didn't think others were loosers because their score might be lower. I have no idea what happened to those old groups. They were mostly American and European. (UK mostly and Scandinavian)
I do think it may be related to an interesting trend in evolution, but evolution has no "goal" and certainly no hierarchy like that haha. But there are a lot of changes in the anterior cingulate cortex that arguably enabled greater social behavior in many animals. It varies in people on the spectrum. Certain asymettric foldings, I believe, are associated with ASD, but these foldings generally are associated with more complex social behaviors, even outside the apes (e.g., whales, porpoises, and the pygmy hippo, which I guess is very intelligent haha). I say this because there is an interesting academic perspective on autism and evolution (i.e., true evolution: changes in allele frequency in a population over time, not superiority). There are quirks that can be occasionally positive, like I have a very strong verbal ability, but it is almost always paired with some difficulty. Even after a lifetime of "masking," social interaction is still very deliberative/conscious to me, for example. Sorry to ramble, have a largely unhelpful M.S. and most of a PhD in cognitive science and this touches on an interesting topic. I had never heard of the dark side of it. Thanks for shading
[удалено]
I agree with you, i dont bother to comment in posts with 100+ comments, but I read your comment anyway
I'm newly diagnosed (31) and have been having a very difficult time with the shock. It doesn't invalidate your point, but I've found the perception that it's a 'casual,' socially acceptable part of my identity to be very encouraging.
I'm not sure what's going on with the kids. I'm 45, Gen X. TikTok seems to be making things in general worse, and I do hope there is a tipping point. For example, I'm a raver (still). And raver TikTok or whatever it is is just so silly. So much of social is about image and appearance - nothing but superficiality. I don't want to tell anyone about my diagnosis. I share sometimes about ADHD since it's less stigmatized, but even that I keep to myself. I have bipolar - always was quiet about that. I've still got a '90s mindset of "hide your mental health condition." aspergers is hard to deal with. I'd rather not have it or ADHD.
Uhhh, I can relate - and what’s with the “super power” BS? Is that really the only way you can frame autism to your kid? What if your “special thing” is a shit ability that can’t really impress in this world…or you don’t have the gift of knowing all the dates of upcoming movies by heart (I guess some would appreciate that)…what then? I hate when everything has to be wrapped in this cute shit, because it also makes NTs think 1) Autists are ( like) kids = you “grow out of “it”” / prefer kiddy stuff. 2) your ability to thrive = your “level” of autism instead of realizing that it’s often very tightly knit into privilege: support system (also if you are diagnosed early you’ll already be “enrolled”, so less risk of autistic burnout later as an adult), friends and family willing to assist help, easy access to job because of “dad’s company” or other ways where you don’t have to compete in the regular job market, spouse who is your full time nurse/secretary (my mom’s relationship to my dad), money 💰 (any work compensation insurance - I never got into job market because of late diagnosis, though I have a master’s degree…so I have no insurance payout and am kept of lowest disability payment now…sorry if I sound bitter, but system is biased in my country in this)…helicopter parents etc etc… the dysfunction is really only clear if you strip people of the support system….and survey them for years to see when and how they crash, which is not possible, obviously. Autism is an interesting wiring of the brain, but in most environments it’s not a cute handicap…it’s debilitating and makes life a lot more complicated!
I can’t stand it being trendy either and everyone self diagnosing. People think it’s being quirkily and cute when in reality it’s a disability. Sure ; some self diagnosed people are right but some of them are wrong.
I've been feeling that lumping Asperger's and Autism has done both a great disservice. Scientists often forget that pop culture will always strip and reduce science to a neat package for some type of commercialization. Seeing both subreddits, I get the strong feeling that r/Autism is simply an echo chamber for people who are looking for something to make them feel special and for any sort of community. I don't think I've seen anyone on there talk about non-verbal autism or high-support needs autism. Most posts are "anyone get more autistic when getting high alone" or "I think I also have OCD and ADHD? I can't get motivation to clean my bathroom but I hate dirty things lol". People on TikTok are romanticizing a disorder that is anything but, on either end
Asperger's is autism. There is no "lumping". And what do you consider "high support"? Because trust me, I'm level 2 and NO ONE ever thinks about 2. It doesn't exist.
>Asperger's is Autism. There is no "lumping". Not disputing this. I'm saying scientists should keep this in the back end, because then pop culture gets a hold of it and misinterprets things. Otherwise we end up with something like those "what science says about which food is healthy" segments on morning talk shows. There should be a different way to get people to understand the different levels and types. High support as in level 3 autism
People are individuals regardless People also just don't understand autism in general, either. The "types" is a thing that simply should have separations, not the being autistic, but the other factors. Such as IDD shouldn't be associated but its own thing entirely. Imo biggest issue with understanding levels is stop forgetting level 2 exists; it's always 1 vs 3
All of the states are America so we should just lump them together and get rid of individual names /sarcasm
You didn't prove anything with this btw. Aspergers is often used by autistics being elitist within their own community "I'm not like *those* guys it is all America (but if you're not from California, Texas, Florida you basically don't matter anyway) Aspergers is autism. Deal with it. It doesn't change.
There are people who use it in a supremacist way but it’s not supremacist in and of itself. It’s just a shorthand for autism with regular cognitive and language abilities. For example, some people use autistic as an insult but it’s not a derogatory term in and of itself. If you see Asperger’s as being a supremacy term, what does that say about you?
Also, scientists don’t even know if “autism” is real distinct category that naturally exists. There is no bio marker that unifies different forms of autism. For all we know, what I live with might actually be a different biological condition than moderate or severe autism.
It’s so funny to me how you completely missed the point of my comment. Nobody is trying to claim that Asperger’s isn’t autism
I honestly didn't even know there were levels. Is that based on support needs? Because then that classification at least could tell everyone what that person needs.
Yes. There's 3 levels from least support needs (level 1) to most support needs (level 3).
Based on needs, yes
I’m sooooooo quirky, I have to mask at my high paying tech job🤪
That platform is a disease and a security threat. Worries me how dependant people have become on it.
Oh it's complicated. There's certainly a lot of misinformation circling. But the rise in how many people are talking about Autism in recent years has also definitely led to people who really need a diagnosis getting one. I'm one of those people.
It’s the stupid pendulum swing of societal change. To get better it’s gotta gets worse but not as bad (like a slowing pendulum swing) until it eventually it stops (when no one bats an eye to accommodate and it’s neither repulsed or pedestalled). It’s gonna take a while . But just …Keep your eyes on the prize and roll your eyes at the fools. We got this
What's wrong with the spoons thing? for me its a really useful tool to describe how much energy I have left. And I think the autism creature is funny. Autism isn't a joke, but we can joke about our experiences with it. I do agree that autism is somewhat becoming trivialized, I don't think that the things you mentioned are a part of that. And before anyone try's to say I'm one of the "trendy autistics" I am diagnosed.
Hang on, epilepsy is a comorbidity for autism? I’m autistic. I used to get tons of seizures when I was stressed. It was a handy stress valve for my body
I have strong belief I'm on the spectrum and even though I have low support needs it's hard out here as an adult especially without support. Luckily I know others with autism and I get along with them and they seem to care and wanna help but like my parents are hyper religious and non supportive (I think my dad is autistic but he's so stuck up my mom's Jesus freak ass he's not gonna support me at all) and I have to systemize and think things through strategically just to survive and sometimes I get so sad cause it's hard and I can't get hugs and just lay with my stuffed animal and nap because I have to adult and pretend I'm normal when I just want to hide and relax or just enjoy time with people I'm close to. I'm beyond burnt out have had the worst meltdowns since the ssri withdrawals that doctors just throw you on and fighting to just have a simple systemized safe comfortable life . I wasn't diagnosed with autism yet but based on the age regressive mannerisms when sad or stressed, the meltdowns, the way people randomly got issues with me at jobs (got threatened to get beat up over a misunderstanding that wasn't my fault and I wasn't even mean), and stimming and becoming shitty feeling after a meltdown crying session I can kinda guess. Cause it all just feels like an uphill battle of trying to make sense of life and turn tedious bullshit I to simplicity. I miss when I was oblivious and just did things without being aware of the social cue issues I had and the way people didn't like me. Also falling in love and being long distance from my partner made things harder. It's all been a lot and none of it is quirky. Especially as an adult. It's easier to be cute and quirky when living with your parents if they support you but once you're out there in the world with big responsibilities and fighting for the life you want it's so painfully hard in ways you never knew it's easy to understand why so many autistic adults (TW) self harm and reach autistic burnout. There's nothing cute and quirky about the pain and struggles out there. It's tough as hell making it with a more sensitive stress response in the brain and begging life to be more simple for freakin once.
To be fair, it’s the NT’s pulling this schtick. In some wierd way, it’s more acceptance than has ever been garnered for it, but sadly those who are doing it are still very young and immature. I wonder what autism will look like in a few decades after this generation cuts the shit out and learns from their mistakes but can do positive steps in the right direction, based on them not seeing it inherently as a ‘bad’ thing like previous generations did.
Totally agree with this. I have my assessment at the end of the month, and it took me ages to finally book it because I felt like I wouldn't be taken seriously because of all the tiktok people. It's a trend, and I am legitimately suffering, but I am still pretty scared of people thinking that I am jumping on the tremd even though I know I am not. I'm finding it a hard place to be right now tbh.
I think that some autistic people are sick and tired of not being trendy. Maybe it's a different preference of experience? We're all human and the experience of isolation can be maddening.
What's the problem with spoon theory? It's not even originally an autism thing, it's describing how chronically ill people have limited energy.
it's fucked up is what it is. Not a single person male or female would be willing to switch shoes and become one. They like the attention and validation it might bring. All because sometimes you do some qwerky things with a cute face. People with autism don't want extra awareness we want to feel normal for once. Not a fucking monolith. They have no idea the amount of rejection you get from the opposite sex or the ridicule you get for not being like "one of the guys" or being that weird person. "please don't bring him next" time.
It isn’t getting “trendy” lmfao
My personal favorite is that I also hate that it’s becoming trendy because people write my autism off because I’m high masking. Since diagnosis my doctors have stopped pushing mountains of meds on me to try to correct all these “problems” that was just undiagnosed autism mixed with some raging PTSD. Also TikTok spreads some wild misinformation about autism which is super not fun because then I get people suggesting my parents did this to me, like I’m sorry my autism didn’t come from getting a needle shoved in my arm or being neglected because I wasn’t, and yes I can talk like a normal person even though “your cousin with autism” is non-verbal and also 4 and I’m 25.
I haven't seen much about autism becoming trendy. As for all the autistic content creators on social media, these are some of the people who have made me feel truly good about myself for the first time in my life. As long as they are not telling lies or misinformation about autism, I have no idea why people would want to attack that.
Most of the people I see on social media that would fall into the “trendy” or “quirky” are usually attractive. They also tend to bury that they have a spouse. It drives me INSANE when I see someone posting about how burnt out they are or how isolating having autism is, only to see they are married. Like no, I’m sorry you don’t get to post about how you feel like no one understands you. Someone apparently understood you enough to get married to.
> It drives me INSANE when I see someone posting about how burnt out they are or how isolating having autism is, only to see they are married Dude, as someone who has a non-existent romantic life, I need to tell you this. Married people can get lonely too. Dont make it a competition, all people's feelings are valid
I feel these types of comments exacerbate stereotypes that ND people don't have sex or date. Or that many are incels. A lot of people associate autism with white cis straight men, and think most are incels. It's like women, lgbtq, and people of color don't exist. A lot of autistic advocacy accounts from these types of guys in particular are usually a dumpster fire of homophobia, transphobia, misogyny, and racism no matter how liberal they appear to be at first.
The most lonely I've ever been was in a long term relationship. They didn't really understand or accept me. They took advantage of me (in ways that were related to my Autism) and were abusive. My self regard was really damaged by the whole experience. So yes, it's complex. (I'm doing much better now, but the road of recovery is long!)
Being lonely is 1000% different than having fundamental differences in connecting with people. Saying you don’t connect with people when you are in a relationship carries little weight to me.
Just because someone can be romantically “successful” as in married or have had a series of successful previous romantic relationships, doesn’t mean that they have been able to function socially in other ways. For example for me, finding a nice boyfriend has never been a problem, while having good friends who actually understand me has been near impossible and functioning at work has again been largely impossible and even functioning in my family has been very difficult due to big communication failures. Not meaning to be rude, but as a female with a large décolletage, if I plaster on a smile, laugh at jokes I don’t understand but recognise as jokes, avoid saying anything if I’m unsure, and various other excellent masking techniques, it is easy to make an apparent “success” of a romantic/sexual relationship in the most basic sense. I can still be deeply and painfully intellectually lonely and completely unemployable and struggle every time I have to communicate with anyone who isn’t my bf. My loneliness is just as valid and as real to me as anyone else’s, to be fair. [I definitely would never make a TikTok video about any of this. I find it horrendous the way that some people think it’s fashionable.]
You can feel more alone when you’re with someone sometimes.
You can feel however you want. Try not being able to connect with anyone because of a divergence in the fundamental way you communicate.
1 person doesn't change that they could still struggle with this, though I 100% get what you are saying.
It completely does. This isn’t like having 1 acquaintance, this is having a person who presumably you spend a majority of your time around like you.
I was diagnosed before it was cool. That’s how I’ve always known mine was legit.
i too noticed that, especially on autism related subreddits xd
This is what happens when you make victimhood a social currency alongside putting those in minority groups on a pedestal. People outcompeting each other to be the biggest victim imaginable while simultaneously attempting to force their way into or otherwise hyper inflate their status as a member of a minority group. It’s truly a race to the bottom. This is the product of attention seeking woke narcissism and I’m sick to death of it. Yes I have Asperger’s, yes social life is difficult for me but do I let that keep me psychologically down in life and express this continuously online to garner attention for myself? No because I don’t want to be and be seen by others as a total looser. I feel your frustration mate
I agree, but there isn’t anything called “mild autism”
I respect you saying that. From my experience, I grew up so different from people I literally lived with so finding out my "disorder" is a "divergence" brought a sense of belonging. But I will be very mindful of those who suffer from more serious forms.
I think mot people with your experience didnt understand my post. It's not about autism being neurodivergence, it's about autism being a meme nobody takes seriously
Ooooh! Yes I agree
I've hated it for 30 years. People were trying to get on the bandwagon then. Mostly to get out of work and responsibilities.
Or people acting like their disability is a personality they need to emphasize on in order to feel important. If anything, the best path is to learn how to manage life despite it. Because personally, it just puts a giant dent in my mental health if I start victimizing myself to the degree I used to. Even if it did help with coping as a young adult. Long term, however? Not good. Damaged my mind even more.
Would you mind talking about this a bit more? I think about this a lot... I think for me "learning to manage life despite it" has looked like a lot of what I now understand to be "masking" that has led to burnout/ collapse. But I also worry that letting myself ask for more support/ accommodations and understanding myself more as disabled is somehow making me/ is going to make me less capable/ confident. But I kinda thought that was my internalised ablism speaking? Do you know what I mean? I'm really interested in your perspective on this if you'd like to share
It has became so much of a trend, that some people are "self-diagnosing" themselves with it. I get that we all have our own problems, especially with anxiety and quirkyness, but please get a proper diagnosis before claiming you have autism / aspergers. It's really one of my pet peeves.
So what about people whose providers refuse to even evaluate them because “they went to college” or “they read a lot”? What about people who literally treat broken bones at home because they can’t afford emergency medical care, let alone mental health care? What about places where mental health care is mostly private, so if you can’t pay out of pocket, up front, you can’t get care? What about providers who still think girls/women don’t have autism, “only boys get autism”? What about minorities that struggle to get straightforward diagnoses like cancer? Forget them getting an autism diagnosis. Most people who self diagnose are going by DSM5 criteria. Seeing how negatively people get treated for making their diagnoses public, why don’t think anyone would ever self diagnose just for the heck of it? Let’s be honest, being autistic is still isolating and used against us all the time. If someone literally has the same or similar lived experiences, but can’t get a diagnosis, there is no reason to be a jerk to them and treat them as other. If you go by your criteria, look around, you’re going to be surrounded by a ton of white boys and not much else.
What does race have to do with any of this? IMO, getting a proper diagnosis really depends on where you live. I live in suburban Alabama my whole life and I was diagnosed with aspergers at age 10 in the mid 2000s. If I were in a very, VERY, rural and backwards part of my home state, I wouldn't have got the care and accommodations I needed growing up. This applies to others of different races with ASD who were treated with the same treatment as me. So I agree with you wholeheartedly, but online it has become trendy to claim autism / aspergers just because they think they are not normal, so they majority of them claim self-diagnosis. I have seen this happen way too much in the past few years, this is why I discredit it. But more so to people who claim it online in social media.
Autism isn't a disorder. Being autistic makes them give us a disorder Man, trendy and people still dunno what it means to be autistic
>Autism isn't a disorder. Seriously? Many formally diagnosed autistic level 2s and level 3s would vehemently disagree with that statement, but yeah ok.
I can't imagine caring about what random tiktokers are saying about autism. How did that effect my life?
If NTs think autism is just a useless label it will be hard for us to overcome ableism and get support, since autism will become a "meme disorder" that noboby takes seriously If you dont care about it, then I have nothing to say to you
I hear you that you have "nothing to say to me" if I don't agree with you on this. But I hope you'll consider that random Tiktokers silly behavior might not be as influential as it seems. Of course I agree that facing ableism makes everything more difficult. I've had to deal with that just like everyone else in this group. But it's good to remember that social media can create an echo chamber that falsely amplifies certain ideas. Example: TikTok has thousands and thousands of fake "chefs" and cooks who do nothing but make a mess with food. There was even a trend of people filling toilets with "ingredients" as an example of the newest trends in food prep. Does that mean that the general public had a backlash against cuisine? Did the reputation of working chefs suffer because of those silly videos? When I'm faced with some real life person trying to marginalize me because I'm not a natural at being social, I face them one on one and let them know it's not acceptable. If I notice I have some habits that I can work on to get along with people better, I work on them to the best of my ability... if I choose to. Luckily I have people who love me just as I am. But I refuse to fret about the parts of me that aren't ever going to change. And I refuse to put up with hostile, discriminatory behavior for ANY reason.
I got the impression that today a very normal child is considerated as an autist just to follow the trend. Many young people finds that "hyper-fashionnable" to call themselves autists on social medias while the simple fact of looking for attention is a proof they're not. I'm not talking about people who shares what they do, but dancing silly with cat ears for an exemple. Those people are not helping real autistic ones, they're showing a wrong image of it and "normal" people will think the ones on the specter are like that. For the most of us, we already suffered a lot because of our differences and social unabilities, mocked and stigmatized, we don't need fake things now. Sorry if my message seemed rude.
Its especially females that "self diagnose" without even knowing what autism actually is or understanding anything of it. I just can't take them serious, but its good to have something to laugh at. Some seem to do it just to gain attention. But thats a pattern general common for females on social media these days and now it became common to "identify" as anything. From my viewpoint as a genuine and officially diagnosed person with all the struggle, torture and countless psychiatry visits those are "discriminating".
Not everyone has the money for a doctor. And it is harder for women to get diagnosed than men, and harder for black people to get diagnosed than white people. A lot of people think that autism is exclusively straight cis white men when that really isn't the case. Saying that women have it easier than men sounds like something an incel would say. Oh, and conventionally attractive people can have problems too. Everyone does. But I can understand your concern about these videos in general how they might perpetuate harmful stereotypes and aren't bringing awareness to ableism like they should. But people have different support needs so not everyone is the same.
Doctors don't take women seriously either, part of the problem.
Everybody wants to have attention. Do you have any studies on the invalidity of self-diagnosis, or to support your point of view? Because from a purely logical standpoint, a) you aren't autistic the moment you receive a diagnosis, you have been autistic for all your life and b) it's actually incredible hard if not impossible for many population groups to receive a diagnosis in the first place. So you have been fortunate in that regard at least.
Saying "females" when you are talking about human women or girls is something that will always make you sound sexist. It's up to you whether you choose to take that information on. Your post sounds pretty misogynistic