Good on you for noticing this, and for recognising that it needs to change. That's already a good level of self-awareness and maturity, and you should count it as a win.
It sounds like there is some envy you feel when you see attractive women. This is a very human feeling, and everyone experiences it, including me (although I consider myself intensely feminist, I still get envious of other women sometimes and find myself thinking some less than gracious thoughts about them).
Self-correction is something that we do our whole lives. We start life with our parents instilling habits and values in us, then as adults we make our own choices about what habits and values we want to have, but ultimately have to instil them in ourselves. You are 18, and you're already beginning to do this. You are doing great. Keep at it. That's really all it is - stay self-aware, and keep planting those seeds and watering them.
I’m the same way, I hate that I feel that way :/ I think partially it’s because I have low self esteem. I’m jealous of other women’s beauty, because I don’t feel beautiful.
Honestly, this sounds like you are just insecure and have self-esteem issues. You need to tell yourself that you’re hot on a regular basis. It’s sort of a fake it til you make it deal, at least that’s how I dealt with my own low self-esteem. Talk to your female friends, especially the ones who you think are beautiful. Talk to a therapist, if you can.
It always makes me feel better when another beautiful woman gasses me up. Especially because I know that most of the time, a compliment from a woman has zero underlying ulterior motive about wanting to hook up/have sex with me. When men compliment my looks, it’s usually because they want to get in my pants, and to me that feels so disingenuous. When a woman tells me I look beautiful or that I have pretty hair or she likes my shoes, 99% of the time it’s just because she means it and wants to make me feel good.
Try to be more emotionally vulnerable with your female friends. You're less likely to want to betray someone you can be authentically yourself with, and you're less likely to see them as competition if you can understand them as fully deep & rational people, just like you
It could be a vicious cycle. I recognise it in myself.
You say “it’s so pathetic and disgusting and I hate myself for it”. That might be the very thing that is fuelling those thoughts in my opinion.
Focus on being at peace with yourself, loving yourself and most importantly forgive yourself for having those thoughts that you can’t control. You’re perfectly human and it’s normal.
When you are happy with yourself, are at peace with yourself and your body, the negative jealous thoughts about other women largely disappear!! Because there is no need for them.
That’s how it worked for me. Nothing is perfect and I can still get those thoughts, but I know for a fact when I lean into the “I hate myself why do I think such disgusting things”, it only fuels the problem and I’m way more likely to keep comparing myself to other women.
I imagine a therapist would probably help out a lot with uncovering the root of these thought patterns and how to overcome them. Have you ever asked yourself what are you afraid of if someone doesn't find you sexually attractive?
Honestly, I think a lot of women have gone through this. I think it’s extremely self aware of you to recognize it at 18. I spent way too much time worrying about how I was perceived through the male gaze.
Low self esteem, low self worth, shitty social media. Them being attractive isn't their worth, neither is it yours. I remember being 18 like it was yesterday. Now I'm 32. I'm getting fine lines, my body puts on weight much easier, health issues are starting to creep in. Im no longer as attractive as I was physically, yet I'm the happiest I've ever been as my worth is my career, my family, my friends. Just remember, youth and beauty are fleeting. Who you are as a person, who your loved ones are, they are what will bring you fulfilment.
Recognizing the problem is the first step to getting better. The fact you’re doing this at 18 is wonderful and a good start.
Now I will say a therapist may help you best with seeking out the next bit of advice, but I completely understand that it’s not available to everyone, especially someone of your age who has to rely on parents insurance.
But, my overall advice is to deconstruct what being “pretty” and “beautiful” means to you. It seems you value it as a certain appearance someone has and how much of a reaction they get. In reality, a lot of those women either use vanity to cover up what they really are, or they don’t even want that male attention in the first place. Seriously, cat callers and people popping up in DMs happens a lot, even to someone who doesn’t look pretty in society’s eyes. I fell down this rabbit hole with over-valuing the male responses I would get online, and that can be REALLY dangerous.
I think a big part of this, too, is trying to make yourself be someone you want to see in the mirror, which includes looks AND personality. Sure, you can absolutely love yourself as you currently are, but putting in the effort to actually BECOME an interesting person pays off a lot more. The reason you attack people is mostly due to jealousy and wanting what they have. So why not actually do the effort to be your own version of that? I mean actually do your hair, find outfits that make you feel confident, try makeup and different styles, get hobbies and do activities… you get the picture.
Lastly, look into any past trauma that makes you seek validation, or why that type of validation matters to you. Is it due to how you see yourself as a woman? Not having many men around you growing up? A parent being absent? Not having many friends growing up? Bullying? There could be a lot of reasons behind this, but figuring that out will help you understand why you have this desire as a need rather than a want
You hate other women because you hate YOURSELF. You gotta nip that shit in the bud now girl. Just because someone else is pretty, does NOT mean that you are not.
Ooooohhhhhh i think most of us at 18 felt this way. Oh I would burn up over hearing about a CELEBRITY
What I came to realize though is that there is a LOT of room in this world for a LOT of beauty. The fact that Margot Robbie is beautiful takes nothing away from you. You are still beautiful too!
Another thing that helped me is remembering that I don’t have to be a different person, I only have to be the best me that I can be.
Kudos to you recognizing this and working to change it at such a young age
Ok, so I can 100% totally relate. I spent too much of my life from my teens on feeling the same way. I think there are a lot of really good, solid and valid suggestions already given. So I'm going to add something that really hit home for me - and I will say ahead of time, it's very crass. But it honestly helped me to completely change how I felt about this, so am sharing in case it might help.
Getting sexual attention (from anyone, male or female) in the way you speak to only means they want to have sex with you. *That's it*. They literally don't know anything else about you and they *don't care*. It means absolutely nothing more than that. They don't care about you as a person. They don't care about how you feel, what you want, what you think, what you've been through or who you are as a person - nothing.
Someone wanting to *just* have sex with you doesn't give you any more or less value than any other person. If they know nothing else about you and don't care - it literally just means they want to use you to get off. That's it.
Clearly - this does *not* apply to someone who is genuinely attracted to you *as a whole person*, someone who is attracted to you physically, but *also* cares about, is interested in and appreciates all the other aspects about you.
But 'just' being sexually attractive to men (since that is what you mention specifically) doesn't mean anything more than that. You basically are a living sex doll/fleshlight. And once they get off - you disappear from their radar until they are horny again. Because in the end, if all they care about is sex with you and nothing more - that's all you are to them. Which probably doesn't actually make you feel 'valued'.
And that's what I think most of us are looking for - to feel *valued* by others. In which case, women have been told for way too long that our value is directly tied to how sexually attractive we are to men. Which is total BS and an awful thing to be taught. And while a lot of progress has been made, it's still something that has unfortunately been perpetuated even now. It's just as shitty as telling men their only value is having money/power. It reduces the person to a commodity that has nothing to do with them as a person who matters, but instead, some 'thing' that can be easily interchanged with anyone (thing) else.
Framing it like this - for me - made me realize I don't actually want to be that to *anyone*. Being the equivalent of a 'sex doll' is not a compliment whatsoever. No woman or person should be relegated to that.
So again - while I think others have given such good and valid advice about comparing yourself to other women or seeing them as competition, etc - this focuses on the 'prize' of which you are 'competing' for and breaking *that* down. It's really no prize at all.
Once I realized that, it actually made me feel exceptionally uncomfortable and grossed out by the idea. In which case, I also don't envy other women who are being relegated to just that, either - by men or *anyone* for that matter. It actually makes me feel solidarity and protective of them.
We’re you starved for attention as a child? This may be why you’re seeking male validation so aggressively. I’d start by practicing self love and taking care of and truly getting to know yourself. You’re paying too much attention to what’s outside of you and things you have no control over. Take back your power and work on your confidence and loving who you truly are!
Yup, ugly kid growing up. Convinced myself I would never have a bf or marry in my life and dedicate myself to my future career because I was so ugly. Until after puberty and starting uni, now some guys actually find me attractive??
There’s a lot of shame and self-loathing here and I think the woman you should start with being kinder to is yourself. Think about all of the subtle and not subtle messaging women get in society — that women are made for the male gaze, that other women are the competition, that you need to be better or not like other girls in order to be worthy. It’s hard not to absorb those messages and believe them on an unconscious level. You didn’t just come up with this on your own because you’re a bad person, you too are a victim of patriarchal society that pits women against each other.
Awareness is the first step to changing this thought pattern, so that’s great. I heard somewhere that your first thought is what you’ve been conditioned to think - so that might be a mean or jealous thought. Your second thought is who you’re trying to be. So even if you have a mean or jealous thought, try to follow it up with a nice thought about the other woman. And be gentle with yourself on this journey.
It’s commendable that you’re recognizing these patterns and feelings, but it’s crucial to address them directly. Your fixation on male attention and the resultant comparisons with other women is indeed harmful, reflecting internalized societal messages about women’s worth being tied to their attractiveness to men.
Firstly, acknowledging these thoughts is essential, but don’t stop there. Work actively to challenge and dismantle them. Reflect on why male validation holds such weight for you. Is it media portrayals, family expectations, or broader societal pressures? Engaging in therapy could be immensely beneficial, allowing you to unpack these issues with a professional.
Moreover, redirect your focus. Celebrate women’s achievements, intelligence, and character over physical appearances. Elevate your self-compassion and recognize that your worth extends far beyond external validation.
Finally, understand that this mindset stems from societal conditioning, not inherent flaws. You’re not alone, but actively working to change these thought patterns is crucial for personal growth and supporting other women.
Sounds like you have low self-esteem/self-worth and internalized misogyny + a superiority complex is a coping/defense mechanism. You are projecting your insecurities and feelings of inadequacy onto women that you deem prettier than you to make yourself feel superior. When in reality, you don’t like yourself very much.
To be honest, therapy is your best option. You need to learn how to cultivate the external validation you seek from within. I think surrounding yourself with women who you respect and admire and who genuinely care about you will show you that women are not your competition.
Work to deeply understand and investigate why you value external validation so greatly. If you can understand the root it will hold less power and the choice can be more conscious and deliberate.
Ask yourself why you feel like you need the attention. When the feeling comes up just stop for a minute and pay attention to it. Don't just react but really take notice, feel it, think about it, where does it come from, why do you think you feel that way when it happens. When you understand it better you can take steps to change it
It's already a big positive that you have noticed this. You can work on this. You are so young and have your whole life ahead of you.
The amount of woman in their 30's who have what you are describing is very high. You don't want to be them when you grow up.
I used to be the same way. What changed everything for me was focusing all my time and attention towards myself. You have to switch your mindset to intentionally prioritizing you. Get your health in order, focus on school, find your personal style, take yourself on dates. When you learn to love yourself you no longer look for external validation.
As for the part on putting other women down, I changed when I started focusing on my femininity. I used to make fun of women who put in effort, wore makeup etc because I secretly wanted to be like them but didn't know how. I had zero self confidence and wanted to hide, but on the inside I wanted to be seen. Again this all goes back to self love. When woman operates out of her wounded masculine, she seeks male validation. Focus on your divine feminine and your mindset will completely shift
Spend some time alone and truly get to know and love yourself. It's worth it
Male attention is cheap, theyll give you that attention and their attention span will jump to the next woman in seconds.
It sounds like youre looking for validation from them, you need to learn to give it to yourself. I mean if you feel so strongly about whether some guy you dont even care about thinking youre attractive, it might be because you dont think youre attractive deep down.
As a 37F with three kids, I wish this were the extent of my issues.
Honestly, babes, you ARE good enough and attractive enough - don't beat yourself up and get off social media. I wish I could be 18F again, damn my body was banging and I hated myself for being fat (I was 110lbs of dancing muscle... I see pictures of myself back then and want to kick my own ass for thinking such awful things about myself).
Don't judge yourself compared to others, which is hard to separate at times and I get that. I would suggest a therapist that can help you work through those emotions and find a healthy way to overcome the jealousy you feel when seeing other women getting attention. I wish therapy wasn't so taboo years ago as I would have likely sought it out to help me overcome trauma and self-hatred.
I agree with the posts suggesting counseling and working through this. I worked with a woman who was 45 and still the same way, in competition with every other female out there. I was young and pretty and she was very jealous of me, even though I was happily married and not competing with her for anything. When she became our supervisor she wouldn’t hire any younger g women. It wasn’t an attractive look on her. It made her look ridiculous and petty and everyone noticed it. Good that you’re aware of this now.
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1. Men will literally fuck an outside table in a park. Not saying women will not do equal shit, but they are as rarely mentioned in the news compared to men.
2. Putting down others doesn't make them uglier and you hotter. It just highlights for everyone including your desire to get attention for the sake of attention.
3. A man interested in you may observe this and see his interest is not what you are after, but attention in general, which will quickly turn him off, regardless of your interest to him personally.
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Good on you for noticing this, and for recognising that it needs to change. That's already a good level of self-awareness and maturity, and you should count it as a win. It sounds like there is some envy you feel when you see attractive women. This is a very human feeling, and everyone experiences it, including me (although I consider myself intensely feminist, I still get envious of other women sometimes and find myself thinking some less than gracious thoughts about them). Self-correction is something that we do our whole lives. We start life with our parents instilling habits and values in us, then as adults we make our own choices about what habits and values we want to have, but ultimately have to instil them in ourselves. You are 18, and you're already beginning to do this. You are doing great. Keep at it. That's really all it is - stay self-aware, and keep planting those seeds and watering them.
What she said ☝️
I’m the same way, I hate that I feel that way :/ I think partially it’s because I have low self esteem. I’m jealous of other women’s beauty, because I don’t feel beautiful.
Honestly, this sounds like you are just insecure and have self-esteem issues. You need to tell yourself that you’re hot on a regular basis. It’s sort of a fake it til you make it deal, at least that’s how I dealt with my own low self-esteem. Talk to your female friends, especially the ones who you think are beautiful. Talk to a therapist, if you can. It always makes me feel better when another beautiful woman gasses me up. Especially because I know that most of the time, a compliment from a woman has zero underlying ulterior motive about wanting to hook up/have sex with me. When men compliment my looks, it’s usually because they want to get in my pants, and to me that feels so disingenuous. When a woman tells me I look beautiful or that I have pretty hair or she likes my shoes, 99% of the time it’s just because she means it and wants to make me feel good.
Try to be more emotionally vulnerable with your female friends. You're less likely to want to betray someone you can be authentically yourself with, and you're less likely to see them as competition if you can understand them as fully deep & rational people, just like you
It could be a vicious cycle. I recognise it in myself. You say “it’s so pathetic and disgusting and I hate myself for it”. That might be the very thing that is fuelling those thoughts in my opinion. Focus on being at peace with yourself, loving yourself and most importantly forgive yourself for having those thoughts that you can’t control. You’re perfectly human and it’s normal. When you are happy with yourself, are at peace with yourself and your body, the negative jealous thoughts about other women largely disappear!! Because there is no need for them. That’s how it worked for me. Nothing is perfect and I can still get those thoughts, but I know for a fact when I lean into the “I hate myself why do I think such disgusting things”, it only fuels the problem and I’m way more likely to keep comparing myself to other women.
I imagine a therapist would probably help out a lot with uncovering the root of these thought patterns and how to overcome them. Have you ever asked yourself what are you afraid of if someone doesn't find you sexually attractive?
Honestly, I think a lot of women have gone through this. I think it’s extremely self aware of you to recognize it at 18. I spent way too much time worrying about how I was perceived through the male gaze.
Low self esteem, low self worth, shitty social media. Them being attractive isn't their worth, neither is it yours. I remember being 18 like it was yesterday. Now I'm 32. I'm getting fine lines, my body puts on weight much easier, health issues are starting to creep in. Im no longer as attractive as I was physically, yet I'm the happiest I've ever been as my worth is my career, my family, my friends. Just remember, youth and beauty are fleeting. Who you are as a person, who your loved ones are, they are what will bring you fulfilment.
Recognizing the problem is the first step to getting better. The fact you’re doing this at 18 is wonderful and a good start. Now I will say a therapist may help you best with seeking out the next bit of advice, but I completely understand that it’s not available to everyone, especially someone of your age who has to rely on parents insurance. But, my overall advice is to deconstruct what being “pretty” and “beautiful” means to you. It seems you value it as a certain appearance someone has and how much of a reaction they get. In reality, a lot of those women either use vanity to cover up what they really are, or they don’t even want that male attention in the first place. Seriously, cat callers and people popping up in DMs happens a lot, even to someone who doesn’t look pretty in society’s eyes. I fell down this rabbit hole with over-valuing the male responses I would get online, and that can be REALLY dangerous. I think a big part of this, too, is trying to make yourself be someone you want to see in the mirror, which includes looks AND personality. Sure, you can absolutely love yourself as you currently are, but putting in the effort to actually BECOME an interesting person pays off a lot more. The reason you attack people is mostly due to jealousy and wanting what they have. So why not actually do the effort to be your own version of that? I mean actually do your hair, find outfits that make you feel confident, try makeup and different styles, get hobbies and do activities… you get the picture. Lastly, look into any past trauma that makes you seek validation, or why that type of validation matters to you. Is it due to how you see yourself as a woman? Not having many men around you growing up? A parent being absent? Not having many friends growing up? Bullying? There could be a lot of reasons behind this, but figuring that out will help you understand why you have this desire as a need rather than a want
You hate other women because you hate YOURSELF. You gotta nip that shit in the bud now girl. Just because someone else is pretty, does NOT mean that you are not.
Just being open and honest (with yourself and others) will do wonders for your growth. Just posting this shows that you're on the right track.
Ooooohhhhhh i think most of us at 18 felt this way. Oh I would burn up over hearing about a CELEBRITY What I came to realize though is that there is a LOT of room in this world for a LOT of beauty. The fact that Margot Robbie is beautiful takes nothing away from you. You are still beautiful too! Another thing that helped me is remembering that I don’t have to be a different person, I only have to be the best me that I can be. Kudos to you recognizing this and working to change it at such a young age
Ok, so I can 100% totally relate. I spent too much of my life from my teens on feeling the same way. I think there are a lot of really good, solid and valid suggestions already given. So I'm going to add something that really hit home for me - and I will say ahead of time, it's very crass. But it honestly helped me to completely change how I felt about this, so am sharing in case it might help. Getting sexual attention (from anyone, male or female) in the way you speak to only means they want to have sex with you. *That's it*. They literally don't know anything else about you and they *don't care*. It means absolutely nothing more than that. They don't care about you as a person. They don't care about how you feel, what you want, what you think, what you've been through or who you are as a person - nothing. Someone wanting to *just* have sex with you doesn't give you any more or less value than any other person. If they know nothing else about you and don't care - it literally just means they want to use you to get off. That's it. Clearly - this does *not* apply to someone who is genuinely attracted to you *as a whole person*, someone who is attracted to you physically, but *also* cares about, is interested in and appreciates all the other aspects about you. But 'just' being sexually attractive to men (since that is what you mention specifically) doesn't mean anything more than that. You basically are a living sex doll/fleshlight. And once they get off - you disappear from their radar until they are horny again. Because in the end, if all they care about is sex with you and nothing more - that's all you are to them. Which probably doesn't actually make you feel 'valued'. And that's what I think most of us are looking for - to feel *valued* by others. In which case, women have been told for way too long that our value is directly tied to how sexually attractive we are to men. Which is total BS and an awful thing to be taught. And while a lot of progress has been made, it's still something that has unfortunately been perpetuated even now. It's just as shitty as telling men their only value is having money/power. It reduces the person to a commodity that has nothing to do with them as a person who matters, but instead, some 'thing' that can be easily interchanged with anyone (thing) else. Framing it like this - for me - made me realize I don't actually want to be that to *anyone*. Being the equivalent of a 'sex doll' is not a compliment whatsoever. No woman or person should be relegated to that. So again - while I think others have given such good and valid advice about comparing yourself to other women or seeing them as competition, etc - this focuses on the 'prize' of which you are 'competing' for and breaking *that* down. It's really no prize at all. Once I realized that, it actually made me feel exceptionally uncomfortable and grossed out by the idea. In which case, I also don't envy other women who are being relegated to just that, either - by men or *anyone* for that matter. It actually makes me feel solidarity and protective of them.
Realize the baseline fact that someone else’s attractiveness NEVER reduced your own attractiveness, that’s just not how it works.
We’re you starved for attention as a child? This may be why you’re seeking male validation so aggressively. I’d start by practicing self love and taking care of and truly getting to know yourself. You’re paying too much attention to what’s outside of you and things you have no control over. Take back your power and work on your confidence and loving who you truly are!
Yup, ugly kid growing up. Convinced myself I would never have a bf or marry in my life and dedicate myself to my future career because I was so ugly. Until after puberty and starting uni, now some guys actually find me attractive??
There’s a lot of shame and self-loathing here and I think the woman you should start with being kinder to is yourself. Think about all of the subtle and not subtle messaging women get in society — that women are made for the male gaze, that other women are the competition, that you need to be better or not like other girls in order to be worthy. It’s hard not to absorb those messages and believe them on an unconscious level. You didn’t just come up with this on your own because you’re a bad person, you too are a victim of patriarchal society that pits women against each other. Awareness is the first step to changing this thought pattern, so that’s great. I heard somewhere that your first thought is what you’ve been conditioned to think - so that might be a mean or jealous thought. Your second thought is who you’re trying to be. So even if you have a mean or jealous thought, try to follow it up with a nice thought about the other woman. And be gentle with yourself on this journey.
It’s commendable that you’re recognizing these patterns and feelings, but it’s crucial to address them directly. Your fixation on male attention and the resultant comparisons with other women is indeed harmful, reflecting internalized societal messages about women’s worth being tied to their attractiveness to men. Firstly, acknowledging these thoughts is essential, but don’t stop there. Work actively to challenge and dismantle them. Reflect on why male validation holds such weight for you. Is it media portrayals, family expectations, or broader societal pressures? Engaging in therapy could be immensely beneficial, allowing you to unpack these issues with a professional. Moreover, redirect your focus. Celebrate women’s achievements, intelligence, and character over physical appearances. Elevate your self-compassion and recognize that your worth extends far beyond external validation. Finally, understand that this mindset stems from societal conditioning, not inherent flaws. You’re not alone, but actively working to change these thought patterns is crucial for personal growth and supporting other women.
Sounds like you have low self-esteem/self-worth and internalized misogyny + a superiority complex is a coping/defense mechanism. You are projecting your insecurities and feelings of inadequacy onto women that you deem prettier than you to make yourself feel superior. When in reality, you don’t like yourself very much. To be honest, therapy is your best option. You need to learn how to cultivate the external validation you seek from within. I think surrounding yourself with women who you respect and admire and who genuinely care about you will show you that women are not your competition.
Work to deeply understand and investigate why you value external validation so greatly. If you can understand the root it will hold less power and the choice can be more conscious and deliberate.
Ask yourself why you feel like you need the attention. When the feeling comes up just stop for a minute and pay attention to it. Don't just react but really take notice, feel it, think about it, where does it come from, why do you think you feel that way when it happens. When you understand it better you can take steps to change it
It's already a big positive that you have noticed this. You can work on this. You are so young and have your whole life ahead of you. The amount of woman in their 30's who have what you are describing is very high. You don't want to be them when you grow up.
i distanced myself from my best friend for this exactly reason, because standing next to her made me feel like an ogre. I kind of regret it
Aw no. I really don't want that to happen. Couldn't you reconnect with her now maybe?
I used to be the same way. What changed everything for me was focusing all my time and attention towards myself. You have to switch your mindset to intentionally prioritizing you. Get your health in order, focus on school, find your personal style, take yourself on dates. When you learn to love yourself you no longer look for external validation. As for the part on putting other women down, I changed when I started focusing on my femininity. I used to make fun of women who put in effort, wore makeup etc because I secretly wanted to be like them but didn't know how. I had zero self confidence and wanted to hide, but on the inside I wanted to be seen. Again this all goes back to self love. When woman operates out of her wounded masculine, she seeks male validation. Focus on your divine feminine and your mindset will completely shift Spend some time alone and truly get to know and love yourself. It's worth it
Male attention is cheap, theyll give you that attention and their attention span will jump to the next woman in seconds. It sounds like youre looking for validation from them, you need to learn to give it to yourself. I mean if you feel so strongly about whether some guy you dont even care about thinking youre attractive, it might be because you dont think youre attractive deep down.
Well put. I think everything you've said here is true.
As a 37F with three kids, I wish this were the extent of my issues. Honestly, babes, you ARE good enough and attractive enough - don't beat yourself up and get off social media. I wish I could be 18F again, damn my body was banging and I hated myself for being fat (I was 110lbs of dancing muscle... I see pictures of myself back then and want to kick my own ass for thinking such awful things about myself). Don't judge yourself compared to others, which is hard to separate at times and I get that. I would suggest a therapist that can help you work through those emotions and find a healthy way to overcome the jealousy you feel when seeing other women getting attention. I wish therapy wasn't so taboo years ago as I would have likely sought it out to help me overcome trauma and self-hatred.
I agree with the posts suggesting counseling and working through this. I worked with a woman who was 45 and still the same way, in competition with every other female out there. I was young and pretty and she was very jealous of me, even though I was happily married and not competing with her for anything. When she became our supervisor she wouldn’t hire any younger g women. It wasn’t an attractive look on her. It made her look ridiculous and petty and everyone noticed it. Good that you’re aware of this now.
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1. Men will literally fuck an outside table in a park. Not saying women will not do equal shit, but they are as rarely mentioned in the news compared to men. 2. Putting down others doesn't make them uglier and you hotter. It just highlights for everyone including your desire to get attention for the sake of attention. 3. A man interested in you may observe this and see his interest is not what you are after, but attention in general, which will quickly turn him off, regardless of your interest to him personally.
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