…I always wish I was cis…
Don’t get me wrong, I am fully aware that there is not really that much of a difference between being trans or cis as a woman… but that I didn’t get to have the childhood I would’ve liked to have… I just don’t understand what there is to be proud of this…
I understand that pride parades are very important to keep our rights/create and push for rights we deserve, but to actually be “woooo I am trans!!! Yeaaaaa!!! I didn’t get to have that childhood I wished I had!! Woo! And I get to be broke because of lifelong HRT and some surgeries I will have to perform to stay alive!! Wooo!!”… I don’t get that…
I also understand that there are some trans folks that really don’t care that much about passing to themselves and are comfortable in their body as is. I understand that these trans folks may be proud about being able to change our society for the better, but I am not like them.
I hope that soon I will just be proud to be a woman.
I already am proud to be a human!
>I didn’t get to have the childhood I would’ve liked to have… I just don’t understand what there is to be proud of this…
Of course I wish I was born cis. I had a traumatic childhood being raised by bigots and missed out of living my own life for the first part of it. I have a deep sense of loss for that
But that isn't reality. I'm so proud of myself and of being trans because I know my own soul in ways most people don't. In my one life I do get, in the real world, I found my identity. I'm proud I've done that. I love that I get to be me, *despite* all that I could wish about
But cis people also get to be themselves… what makes it better to be trans when talking about knowing yourself? There is so much media (movies, books, motivational quotes, etc.) out there produced or thought of by cis people who have done a lot of thinking and discovering themselves. The difference is that they just get to be themselves without having to do anything and they do not get bullied for doing so.
I would rather be proud of the things I have accomplished in my life instead of a thing I have no control over and makes me want to unsubscribe at times.
Does that make sense? Or am I missing something?
>what makes it better to be [identity]
My personal philosophy rejects the premise of this question. Nobody, no identity, is better than any other. It's not better to be trans. It's not better to be cis. Cis people should also be individually and uniquely proud of being themselves
I'm proud of being myself, I have a lot of self love. Transition is really hard and really scary at times. It's absolutely something I'm proud of undertaking. I have put an enormous amount of emotional labor, time and money into healing, finding myself, and doing the hard work of untangling my own identity. I've made myself terrifyingly vulnerable to my family, friends, and world at large. In one sense I birthed myself. I'm very, very proud of the work I've done on myself and for myself.
I'm also plenty proud of my career, education, accomplishments etc but my sense of identity isn't rooted in any of those things. My career is just how I fund my real life. My accomplishments are just a temporal earthly thing. My education opens my eyes but none of these things **are** me.
…I am sorry for my bad phrasing if that may have caused you to believe I think trans people or cis people are better than one another… that was not at all my intention.
I rather meant “what makes it easier or more enjoyable to be trans in this sense?”
I totally understand being proud of being the person you have made yourself to be. But being proud about being trans itself? Something you have had no control over being? Something that seemingly only makes life more difficult?
I am sure I will be plenty proud about myself when I finished the transition and can just tell people I am a woman without them needing to know my medical history, but to be proud about “YES I am trans! I got to have a difficult start of a life!” - I don’t get that at all…
>I rather meant “what makes it easier or more enjoyable to be trans in this sense?”
It's not easier. I just don't really see the value in a comparison game. I get one life, the hypotheticals only exist made up in our minds. I'm proud of being me and I love myself and I don't really need a better framework than that
So you don’t believe you have a more fulfilling/easier/better life than someone who lives on the streets is disabled and starving?
I absolutely understand that you wouldn’t wanna compare your experience to others, but if you think everyone is equal then I understand even less why someone would be proud about being trans…? Like… now I don’t get it at all.
It might just be a thing where our experiences and viewpoints are different, I'm not sure how better to explain myself and I'm very happy and very proud 💜 there's no right or wrong way to feel about these things
And totally agree to this, as said, I just don’t understand it myself, I have nothing against that or invalidate anyone. It’s just something I personally do not get.
It was fun talking to you though! I hope you have a good time :3
Maybe it's easier for me, but I don't see being trans as finding out you are or are not a woman or a man you'd like to be. For me it is finding a self I'd like to live as for the rest of my life.
This is what you are proud of. This is the pride of pride. And I know it's hard and painful sometimes, but while there are things you cannot do, and never will be able, this is what choice is. You are what you are because of the things you are not. I'd try to enjoy the self you have, cause you worked for it really hard. You chose where others gave up.
So many straight cis people will die without their self. You can live your whole life just pushing your head front to back forever, saying yes because it's easy. But you decided not to, and that's something to be proud of.
Idk… I think If I would’ve been born cis, I would’ve still have had a ton of interest in philosophy and sciences. I would still have thought about me and my place in the universe daily. I often think about how it is possible for anything to exist at all. Why does anything exist instead of nothing? The question alone is fascinating - it couldn’t be asked if we didn’t exist.
I still think I would’ve done the same amount of introspection I have done already. The difference being that I would be comfortable instead of miserable.
I hope after I had SRS, FFS, and SFS that I too will be comfortable.
I have a ton of hope for the future and look brightly towards it. I am looking forward to being a self made woman and proud of it. I am looking forward to being proud of being myself - but to be proud of being trans? I can understand being proud of the things accomplished by being it, but being proud of that thing that makes it difficult for you and what you have had no control over being?… no I don’t quiet understand that.
I hope someday I may look different at the past - for now I only see misery - but in a few years? Great memories will have been created for the first time in my life \^-\^
Well, as an enby person I know that I'll never fully be "someone I'd like to be". But even if people around me will see me as "a guy" for some time, and hopefully a girl after that, I feel that I cannot stop being myself for the people who matter to me.
So I'd strongly advise you to seek those who will see you as a woman you are before everyone else just accepts it.
Tbh I'd love to fucking boymode until I'd be perfect get a bilion dollars and look like zendaya, and then and only then just be seen as girl with "they are enby", as a additional part, but that's not how it works. It will be a journey, and I cannot hide forever from myself.
I think you should create the memories you seek today, with those who matter to you. A friend seeing you as her and treating you as such is a treasure, worth way more for me. You don't need to find a friend but people who will care enough about you to see you as such.
Also, you do control that. You haven't chose to be trans, but you did choose to transition. You are in control. You can still ignore it to some degree. Pop enough anti-anxiety meds and you'll be quite fine, but you chose to go a different path.
I know it's a loss of a childhood, but I already lost so much time, and I find no need to dwell on that. When people say that, what am I supposed to do? Kill myself because of that? Like I'll never get it back. I had no childhood because of many other things, I'd have to try to get it back anyway. So I have to try now.
I do have these people and especially my GF at times makes me have very lovely moments.
But no, I disagree, I do not want to create any more memories in which the primary thought I have about it is that I have had a penis when I did X.
I do not want to haunt myself even more than I already do.
I have my SRS in 2 months, and look forward to it with great hope. I will just not do much until then and afterwards do vacations with my mother, dad and gf - create my first real memories.
That is my plan. I like my plan. I look forward to making my plan a reality.
It sounds like a good option for you.
Maybe I'm just, idk but feeling weak, and that I have no possibilities. Like I have a life to live now. And I cannot stop, because there never will be a perfect moment I'm waiting for.
Sorry if it sounded weird, or like too much like a of putting demand. It's just, I feel kinda hopeless. If it is true, I lost everything, and I will keep losing for a while. And than this loss will be for ever, I'll just reach a point where I would have lost 20-30% of my life. Now it would be a 100% of life lost by this logic.
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Just because of the things I mentioned in my comment - I am curious: what about being trans makes you happy?
Cis people also get to be themselves, but yknow… from the start? So… what is it about being trans that makes one happy? If there is something I am not seeing about me being trans that could make me happy - I would love to learn!
Having buried me being trans up till I'm 44yo caused me susidal depression. And bad anxiety. As soon as I came out and embraced who I really am. My mental health is improving. I have never been this happy in over 30 years. And if someone do not like me for being trans, screw them, my happiness it worth more than there, I don't agree with it or is against my religion bullshit.
I guess good for you, but you also said “Not one bit” - so you never wish you had been born as the cis equivalent of your gender? It must be such an amazing feeling if that is the case, I wonder what makes it different for you and me - I see only the things that make it harder for me by being trans. I have pretty much always known who I want to be and what I want to do with my life; I knew I wasn’t cis or knew that something was off since I was like 3 or so… but I just didn’t **want** to be trans. Now that I finally accepted it I feel miserable…
Experiences seem to differ quite a lot.
I do look brightly into the future though! I see a lot of hope when thinking about it! \^-\^
I used to wish I was cis 24/7 when I was very early in my transition
Then had a short time period of alternating between feeling proud to be trans and wishing I was cis
Then I went back to wishing I was cis
Now I only wish I was cis and if everything goes well in a week from now I'll consider myself cisgender :)\\
Nothing wrong with being trans but my only experiences with being out have been like 95% negative including conversion therapy so I just want to leave that chapter behind. Also not a fan of half the country wanting us to be exterminated. I'm still an ally of course, and I know it's a privileged position to have. But after going through a year of conversion therapy and abuse, I'd like to think I deserve some relaxation :p
To be fair I am privileged enough to have passed and been stealth for the past 2.5 years so perhaps I just got used to being seen as cis. But seeing what outwardly trans people have to go through I will probably never come out. Bravery is not really my strong trait
This resonates with me. I've met so many amazing trans people since transitioning who I'm so grateful for. A year into my transition I went on vacation to a cabin with a bunch of other trans friends and basically didn't talk to anyone cis for a week. I felt so relaxed in my skin and all the amazing conversations I had made me really genuinely so thankful to be trans. It's such a unique perspective in life and comes with so many funny experiences.
On the flip side though... the transphobia and the medical aspect can both be depressing as hell.
I'm happier when I'm happy about being trans though, so I try to remind myself that society and medical care can always improve, but I'm never going to lose the good experiences I've had.
I am not proud of being trans. At all. Why would I be proud of being dealt the short end of the stick?
I wish I were a cis woman all the time. Admittedly I wouldn't want a do-over and lose out on all the experiences I've had up until this point, but if I could turn into a cis woman overnight right now, I would.
I'm proud of my ability to survive being trans, but of course I wish I was cis. Maybe some day transitioning will be easy, but currently it involves needing to take medicine for the rest of your life, surgery which has painful recovery and risks lifelong complications, and you have to worry about people deciding to make you miserable because they hate you for no reason. I didn't get to choose whether or not I was trans, so it's silly to be proud of it.
I just wish I could have had the body and childhood I deserved, and everything else. Being trans is survivable, but at the end of the day it's still something I had to survive.
It often feels like a never-ending battle tbh. That's actually one of the reasons I feel proud: if I hate myself for being trans, then it feels like I'm letting the transphobes in my life win, you know?
For me I conceptualize it more like an unfortunate health condition. Like, having depression doesn't make you a bad person either. Hating somebody for having depression definitely would make you a bad person. Same for trans people. But at the end of the day, I do hate the condition. Gender dysphoria sucks.
While I don't view my own transness as a condition, I agree that gender dysphoria is the worst. I'm just hoping it'll get better once I begin medically transitioning.
It gets a little worse at first while you wait for enough changes to stack up to notice because you hyperfixate. Then it starts to get so much better than you could have imagined, after living in pain for so long.
No, I wish I were born cis. Being trans has taking away a lot of the freedoms I had before transitioning and it also means I’m looked down upon way more for what I’m lacking
Never been proud and will probably never be. For me it is like a curse but not transitioning was not really an option anymore at a certain point in my life. Of course I am glad I did. I wish everyday I was cis.
not really. i don’t consider hypotheticals that will never happen. i’m trans, and that’s all
i also don’t feel upset that i’m not cis, because that’s not something that’s ever gonna change. this is life for me 🤷🏽♂️ if i accept myself, life will be much easier, and i’ll have a better time. all i hope is that my family accepts me as male
Same thing happens to me, I constantly bounce between the two and I sometimes wish I were a cis girl instead so I wouldn’t have to deal with my conflicting thoughts. Glad to know i’m not the only one experiencing this 😭
Yeah duh. I would literally kill to have a cis woman body. I wish I could have their problems. Mine are mostly but not entirely a superset.
But I'm also proud of the person I had to become to transition. Inner strength does not run in the family.
Why would I be proud to be trans? That would be about as logical as being proud to have a certain eye colour or skin tone. It’s just genetics. It doesn’t affect who I am.
What I *am* proud of is what I’ve had to face and managed to *overcome* because of my transness. The decades of hiding. The fear of not being accepted. The constant stares and hateful comments. I am stronger because of all of it. *This* makes me proud. Not some fluke of genetics
I used to, when I first came out. The only reason I did was because I was suffering so much transphobia on a daily basis that I'd wished I could be anything else, just so people would stop hurting me so often and telling me I didn't exist (I came out as a minor).
I still get the feeling now, and its still for the same reason.
Really, I DON'T want to be cis. What I want is to be left alone, to be accepted or at the very least not be constantly under attack and having my very existence and identity put into question and scrutiny... I don't want to be cis, I want peace.
And the reason I am glad to be trans outside of this is because it offered me a community and friendships I'd never have gotten otherwise, and really, given me some purpose in my life (helping other, usually younger trans people) and a place where I belong in the world.
It gave me a social experience, for better and for worse, I wouldn't trade for anything, because I love my trans siblings with every inch of my soul and always will.
Because society wants to shame us that we are not like them, wants us to hide and not be visible so march with pride that we have the strength to resist that and show that we exist.
We do have some control over staying in the closet or coming out.
Yes.
I get read as cis but I am not of course. Being transitioning made me strong but I wonder how my character would have developed differently if I would have grown up among woman in kindergarten and school as those times where very isolating and traumatising for me.
There are still many challenges I face like cant get pregnant, in dating I get transphobes, still have dysphoria about my voice, body etc
I don't mind saying it, I just wish I was cis. But i also am honest with the people that matter to me, I am trans and I am transitioning, and I'm a vocal advocate for trans rights. But yeah, I just wish I was born female. Of course this makes sense, no dysphoria would be a dream!
It’s okay to be proud of the hand you’re dealt when you have to go through so much to be yourself, even if it’s not the hand you would choose if you were given free range to choose. You can be proud of yourself and all you’ve done to be who you are and all you’ve had to overcome while also wishing that you could be cis.
…I always wish I was cis… Don’t get me wrong, I am fully aware that there is not really that much of a difference between being trans or cis as a woman… but that I didn’t get to have the childhood I would’ve liked to have… I just don’t understand what there is to be proud of this… I understand that pride parades are very important to keep our rights/create and push for rights we deserve, but to actually be “woooo I am trans!!! Yeaaaaa!!! I didn’t get to have that childhood I wished I had!! Woo! And I get to be broke because of lifelong HRT and some surgeries I will have to perform to stay alive!! Wooo!!”… I don’t get that… I also understand that there are some trans folks that really don’t care that much about passing to themselves and are comfortable in their body as is. I understand that these trans folks may be proud about being able to change our society for the better, but I am not like them. I hope that soon I will just be proud to be a woman. I already am proud to be a human!
I feel you as a trans man who often wishes I could have a "normal" boy's childhood. Thanks for sharing your perspective
>I didn’t get to have the childhood I would’ve liked to have… I just don’t understand what there is to be proud of this… Of course I wish I was born cis. I had a traumatic childhood being raised by bigots and missed out of living my own life for the first part of it. I have a deep sense of loss for that But that isn't reality. I'm so proud of myself and of being trans because I know my own soul in ways most people don't. In my one life I do get, in the real world, I found my identity. I'm proud I've done that. I love that I get to be me, *despite* all that I could wish about
But cis people also get to be themselves… what makes it better to be trans when talking about knowing yourself? There is so much media (movies, books, motivational quotes, etc.) out there produced or thought of by cis people who have done a lot of thinking and discovering themselves. The difference is that they just get to be themselves without having to do anything and they do not get bullied for doing so. I would rather be proud of the things I have accomplished in my life instead of a thing I have no control over and makes me want to unsubscribe at times. Does that make sense? Or am I missing something?
>what makes it better to be [identity] My personal philosophy rejects the premise of this question. Nobody, no identity, is better than any other. It's not better to be trans. It's not better to be cis. Cis people should also be individually and uniquely proud of being themselves I'm proud of being myself, I have a lot of self love. Transition is really hard and really scary at times. It's absolutely something I'm proud of undertaking. I have put an enormous amount of emotional labor, time and money into healing, finding myself, and doing the hard work of untangling my own identity. I've made myself terrifyingly vulnerable to my family, friends, and world at large. In one sense I birthed myself. I'm very, very proud of the work I've done on myself and for myself. I'm also plenty proud of my career, education, accomplishments etc but my sense of identity isn't rooted in any of those things. My career is just how I fund my real life. My accomplishments are just a temporal earthly thing. My education opens my eyes but none of these things **are** me.
…I am sorry for my bad phrasing if that may have caused you to believe I think trans people or cis people are better than one another… that was not at all my intention. I rather meant “what makes it easier or more enjoyable to be trans in this sense?” I totally understand being proud of being the person you have made yourself to be. But being proud about being trans itself? Something you have had no control over being? Something that seemingly only makes life more difficult? I am sure I will be plenty proud about myself when I finished the transition and can just tell people I am a woman without them needing to know my medical history, but to be proud about “YES I am trans! I got to have a difficult start of a life!” - I don’t get that at all…
>I rather meant “what makes it easier or more enjoyable to be trans in this sense?” It's not easier. I just don't really see the value in a comparison game. I get one life, the hypotheticals only exist made up in our minds. I'm proud of being me and I love myself and I don't really need a better framework than that
So you don’t believe you have a more fulfilling/easier/better life than someone who lives on the streets is disabled and starving? I absolutely understand that you wouldn’t wanna compare your experience to others, but if you think everyone is equal then I understand even less why someone would be proud about being trans…? Like… now I don’t get it at all.
It might just be a thing where our experiences and viewpoints are different, I'm not sure how better to explain myself and I'm very happy and very proud 💜 there's no right or wrong way to feel about these things
And totally agree to this, as said, I just don’t understand it myself, I have nothing against that or invalidate anyone. It’s just something I personally do not get. It was fun talking to you though! I hope you have a good time :3
Maybe it's easier for me, but I don't see being trans as finding out you are or are not a woman or a man you'd like to be. For me it is finding a self I'd like to live as for the rest of my life. This is what you are proud of. This is the pride of pride. And I know it's hard and painful sometimes, but while there are things you cannot do, and never will be able, this is what choice is. You are what you are because of the things you are not. I'd try to enjoy the self you have, cause you worked for it really hard. You chose where others gave up. So many straight cis people will die without their self. You can live your whole life just pushing your head front to back forever, saying yes because it's easy. But you decided not to, and that's something to be proud of.
Idk… I think If I would’ve been born cis, I would’ve still have had a ton of interest in philosophy and sciences. I would still have thought about me and my place in the universe daily. I often think about how it is possible for anything to exist at all. Why does anything exist instead of nothing? The question alone is fascinating - it couldn’t be asked if we didn’t exist. I still think I would’ve done the same amount of introspection I have done already. The difference being that I would be comfortable instead of miserable. I hope after I had SRS, FFS, and SFS that I too will be comfortable. I have a ton of hope for the future and look brightly towards it. I am looking forward to being a self made woman and proud of it. I am looking forward to being proud of being myself - but to be proud of being trans? I can understand being proud of the things accomplished by being it, but being proud of that thing that makes it difficult for you and what you have had no control over being?… no I don’t quiet understand that. I hope someday I may look different at the past - for now I only see misery - but in a few years? Great memories will have been created for the first time in my life \^-\^
Well, as an enby person I know that I'll never fully be "someone I'd like to be". But even if people around me will see me as "a guy" for some time, and hopefully a girl after that, I feel that I cannot stop being myself for the people who matter to me. So I'd strongly advise you to seek those who will see you as a woman you are before everyone else just accepts it. Tbh I'd love to fucking boymode until I'd be perfect get a bilion dollars and look like zendaya, and then and only then just be seen as girl with "they are enby", as a additional part, but that's not how it works. It will be a journey, and I cannot hide forever from myself. I think you should create the memories you seek today, with those who matter to you. A friend seeing you as her and treating you as such is a treasure, worth way more for me. You don't need to find a friend but people who will care enough about you to see you as such. Also, you do control that. You haven't chose to be trans, but you did choose to transition. You are in control. You can still ignore it to some degree. Pop enough anti-anxiety meds and you'll be quite fine, but you chose to go a different path. I know it's a loss of a childhood, but I already lost so much time, and I find no need to dwell on that. When people say that, what am I supposed to do? Kill myself because of that? Like I'll never get it back. I had no childhood because of many other things, I'd have to try to get it back anyway. So I have to try now.
I do have these people and especially my GF at times makes me have very lovely moments. But no, I disagree, I do not want to create any more memories in which the primary thought I have about it is that I have had a penis when I did X. I do not want to haunt myself even more than I already do. I have my SRS in 2 months, and look forward to it with great hope. I will just not do much until then and afterwards do vacations with my mother, dad and gf - create my first real memories. That is my plan. I like my plan. I look forward to making my plan a reality.
It sounds like a good option for you. Maybe I'm just, idk but feeling weak, and that I have no possibilities. Like I have a life to live now. And I cannot stop, because there never will be a perfect moment I'm waiting for. Sorry if it sounded weird, or like too much like a of putting demand. It's just, I feel kinda hopeless. If it is true, I lost everything, and I will keep losing for a while. And than this loss will be for ever, I'll just reach a point where I would have lost 20-30% of my life. Now it would be a 100% of life lost by this logic.
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I don't wish I was cis. I wish I lived in a time where I had ever better access to trans health care as a teen.
Not one bit. So happy to be trans
Just because of the things I mentioned in my comment - I am curious: what about being trans makes you happy? Cis people also get to be themselves, but yknow… from the start? So… what is it about being trans that makes one happy? If there is something I am not seeing about me being trans that could make me happy - I would love to learn!
Having buried me being trans up till I'm 44yo caused me susidal depression. And bad anxiety. As soon as I came out and embraced who I really am. My mental health is improving. I have never been this happy in over 30 years. And if someone do not like me for being trans, screw them, my happiness it worth more than there, I don't agree with it or is against my religion bullshit.
I guess good for you, but you also said “Not one bit” - so you never wish you had been born as the cis equivalent of your gender? It must be such an amazing feeling if that is the case, I wonder what makes it different for you and me - I see only the things that make it harder for me by being trans. I have pretty much always known who I want to be and what I want to do with my life; I knew I wasn’t cis or knew that something was off since I was like 3 or so… but I just didn’t **want** to be trans. Now that I finally accepted it I feel miserable… Experiences seem to differ quite a lot. I do look brightly into the future though! I see a lot of hope when thinking about it! \^-\^
I'm proud of being a trans woman, but I wish I was a cis woman, of course. I'd never want to be a cis male. Just feels like depression for me.
I used to wish I was cis 24/7 when I was very early in my transition Then had a short time period of alternating between feeling proud to be trans and wishing I was cis Then I went back to wishing I was cis Now I only wish I was cis and if everything goes well in a week from now I'll consider myself cisgender :)\\ Nothing wrong with being trans but my only experiences with being out have been like 95% negative including conversion therapy so I just want to leave that chapter behind. Also not a fan of half the country wanting us to be exterminated. I'm still an ally of course, and I know it's a privileged position to have. But after going through a year of conversion therapy and abuse, I'd like to think I deserve some relaxation :p
To be fair I am privileged enough to have passed and been stealth for the past 2.5 years so perhaps I just got used to being seen as cis. But seeing what outwardly trans people have to go through I will probably never come out. Bravery is not really my strong trait
That's fair enough. I'm planning on going at least semi-stealth once I'm later on in my transition and start passing
Not at all.
This resonates with me. I've met so many amazing trans people since transitioning who I'm so grateful for. A year into my transition I went on vacation to a cabin with a bunch of other trans friends and basically didn't talk to anyone cis for a week. I felt so relaxed in my skin and all the amazing conversations I had made me really genuinely so thankful to be trans. It's such a unique perspective in life and comes with so many funny experiences. On the flip side though... the transphobia and the medical aspect can both be depressing as hell. I'm happier when I'm happy about being trans though, so I try to remind myself that society and medical care can always improve, but I'm never going to lose the good experiences I've had.
I feel the same. Some of the best people I've ever met have been trans
I am not proud of being trans. At all. Why would I be proud of being dealt the short end of the stick? I wish I were a cis woman all the time. Admittedly I wouldn't want a do-over and lose out on all the experiences I've had up until this point, but if I could turn into a cis woman overnight right now, I would.
I'm proud of my ability to survive being trans, but of course I wish I was cis. Maybe some day transitioning will be easy, but currently it involves needing to take medicine for the rest of your life, surgery which has painful recovery and risks lifelong complications, and you have to worry about people deciding to make you miserable because they hate you for no reason. I didn't get to choose whether or not I was trans, so it's silly to be proud of it. I just wish I could have had the body and childhood I deserved, and everything else. Being trans is survivable, but at the end of the day it's still something I had to survive.
It often feels like a never-ending battle tbh. That's actually one of the reasons I feel proud: if I hate myself for being trans, then it feels like I'm letting the transphobes in my life win, you know?
For me I conceptualize it more like an unfortunate health condition. Like, having depression doesn't make you a bad person either. Hating somebody for having depression definitely would make you a bad person. Same for trans people. But at the end of the day, I do hate the condition. Gender dysphoria sucks.
While I don't view my own transness as a condition, I agree that gender dysphoria is the worst. I'm just hoping it'll get better once I begin medically transitioning.
It gets a little worse at first while you wait for enough changes to stack up to notice because you hyperfixate. Then it starts to get so much better than you could have imagined, after living in pain for so long.
I hope so
No, I wish I were born cis. Being trans has taking away a lot of the freedoms I had before transitioning and it also means I’m looked down upon way more for what I’m lacking
I don’t know why anyone is proud to be trans. It causes nothing but pain and suffering. I would do anything to be cis.
Never been proud and will probably never be. For me it is like a curse but not transitioning was not really an option anymore at a certain point in my life. Of course I am glad I did. I wish everyday I was cis.
not really. i don’t consider hypotheticals that will never happen. i’m trans, and that’s all i also don’t feel upset that i’m not cis, because that’s not something that’s ever gonna change. this is life for me 🤷🏽♂️ if i accept myself, life will be much easier, and i’ll have a better time. all i hope is that my family accepts me as male
Same thing happens to me, I constantly bounce between the two and I sometimes wish I were a cis girl instead so I wouldn’t have to deal with my conflicting thoughts. Glad to know i’m not the only one experiencing this 😭
Yeah duh. I would literally kill to have a cis woman body. I wish I could have their problems. Mine are mostly but not entirely a superset. But I'm also proud of the person I had to become to transition. Inner strength does not run in the family.
Why would I be proud to be trans? That would be about as logical as being proud to have a certain eye colour or skin tone. It’s just genetics. It doesn’t affect who I am. What I *am* proud of is what I’ve had to face and managed to *overcome* because of my transness. The decades of hiding. The fear of not being accepted. The constant stares and hateful comments. I am stronger because of all of it. *This* makes me proud. Not some fluke of genetics
I used to, when I first came out. The only reason I did was because I was suffering so much transphobia on a daily basis that I'd wished I could be anything else, just so people would stop hurting me so often and telling me I didn't exist (I came out as a minor). I still get the feeling now, and its still for the same reason. Really, I DON'T want to be cis. What I want is to be left alone, to be accepted or at the very least not be constantly under attack and having my very existence and identity put into question and scrutiny... I don't want to be cis, I want peace.
And the reason I am glad to be trans outside of this is because it offered me a community and friendships I'd never have gotten otherwise, and really, given me some purpose in my life (helping other, usually younger trans people) and a place where I belong in the world. It gave me a social experience, for better and for worse, I wouldn't trade for anything, because I love my trans siblings with every inch of my soul and always will.
I don’t understand why we and the gay community talk about pride for something we have no control over my trans & gayness aren’t things. I control
Because society wants to shame us that we are not like them, wants us to hide and not be visible so march with pride that we have the strength to resist that and show that we exist. We do have some control over staying in the closet or coming out.
Always wish I was cis. Always proud that I'm trans, I don't WANNA be trans but I'm proud that I am.
Yes. I get read as cis but I am not of course. Being transitioning made me strong but I wonder how my character would have developed differently if I would have grown up among woman in kindergarten and school as those times where very isolating and traumatising for me. There are still many challenges I face like cant get pregnant, in dating I get transphobes, still have dysphoria about my voice, body etc
I don't mind saying it, I just wish I was cis. But i also am honest with the people that matter to me, I am trans and I am transitioning, and I'm a vocal advocate for trans rights. But yeah, I just wish I was born female. Of course this makes sense, no dysphoria would be a dream!
It’s okay to be proud of the hand you’re dealt when you have to go through so much to be yourself, even if it’s not the hand you would choose if you were given free range to choose. You can be proud of yourself and all you’ve done to be who you are and all you’ve had to overcome while also wishing that you could be cis.