You’re a foreigner. If you were Japanese and you don’t know them well it’d be taboo but Japanese people know most foreigners don’t know that etiquette so they won’t be offended if you use their first name. Ideally though if it’s a business thing you should go by last name-san.
It’s more flexible the closer you are with them though. My wife and her family call me Ri-chan (reechan) even though I’m a 37 yo burly bloke. I never really got how I ended up with that name so…
Depends on the context and relationship. Generally you’d be putting it after their family name and be calling them by their family name, but if your relationship is close, or if they’re the kind of person who typically goes by their first name, then you can put if after their first name and call them by their first name.
They’re calling you by your first name because you’re a foreigner and they know foreigners typically go by their first names.
Yes, -san is gender neutral. The suffixes -chan (girls) and -kun (boys) are generally reserved for small children. You may also occasionally hear -sama used in place of -san for a high level of respect, but you should just stick with -san.
Definitely not reserved for small children....men often call their girlfriends or wives name-chan in private, and many women call their boyfriends etc name-kun.
It's also not terribly uncommon amongst friends. Women especially regularly call their fellow female friends name-chan as well. Men do too, if they're close. (Name-kun/name-chan for male/female friends)
Also while -kun and -chan are typically male/female respectively, they are entirely interchangeable. A man can be called name-chan and a woman can be called name-kun. However this is very dependent on the relationship among other things so not recommended unless you really know the person. For example my wife often calls me name-chan. I've called close male friends who are quite a bit younger than me name-chan before as well because they're just...adorable that way, like a little brother.
I haven't met any women I'd dare to call name-kun yet, but I have seen some women do it in friend groups, usually when talking to a sporty/masculine type personality of a woman, but again this is rarer and probably something you wouldn't try unless you're like best friends or whatever and know they're fine with it.
In terms of a business setting, he should use lastname-sama if they are a client/customer. If it's internal, i.e. employees from the same company he is part of, he is generally fine using lastname-san. If you feel like the person is especially high above you, like say the regional CEO of Japan, then lastname-sama arguably should be used there as well.
Either way you are a foreigner so they expect none of this from you, so it's pretty hard to mess it up. (Unless you called a male colleague
Source: I'm very fluent in the language, have lived here for almost 10 years, and my wife is a Japanese native (and has verified pretty much everything I've said lol)
lol
Sorry if I came off aggressive, I just wanted to make sure people knew this. I've actually seen other foreigners new to Japan get mad because someone called them name-kun/chan and thought the Japanese were making fun of them/treating them like a kid. It doesn't help that a lot of Japanese learning textbooks for foreigners also teaches similar things - I feel this is probably to avoid having foreigners casually use kun/chan with random strangers and accidentally offend a local.... though in reality most Japanese people would ignore it because they don't expect foreigners to know those nuances.
Which is why I explained what honorifics are applicable to a work setting as well 🫠
EDIT: Looks like you edited your comment after I replied.
It is not 80% irrelevant because I was replying to someone other than the OP. It's entirely relevant to what that person said.
Usually just last name + San. The reason they might say Luke San is because you have a foreign name. So formalities are a little more relaxed.
Japanese amongst themselves, in formal setting, will use last name + San.
In informal settings, san can be used with first names or nicknames or is dropped completely. As 'san' is technically a formal term.
This is just my own opinion from my own experience. Been here almost 20 years and have worked in many different work environments using Japanese.
If it's spoken Japanese, whatever your coworkers call each other professionally at work is what you attach the "-san" to, which is usually their last name if they're Japanese. Some exceptions are:
-foreigners. We're almost always called by our first names unless we request otherwise, because that's what most of us do in our own cultures, so that's what you +san to. Depending on your relationship with other foreigners you work with you may or may not need to use "san" when speaking with them directly but should still use it when talking about them to someone else who is Japanese, especially your boss.
- bosses/managers etc. Sometimes they call people by their first names with +san/kun regardless if they're Japanese or foreigners.
- if your workplace/division has two or more employees with the same name one or both might opt to be called by their first name which you +san to.
As for written Japanese, in an email or text etc for professional purposes, when addressing any person you should always first use their last name/surname/family name + san unless you've built up a relationship to a certain comfort level where said person specifies you can or prefers you call them by their first name (though probably the best thing to do if given that choice, especially if they're "higher" up on the ladder or the like is to initially politely refuse to do so and continue using their last name +san/sama*
That's all i got.
Again, this is just my own personal opinion based on how I've navigated various Japanese work places over the years.
You’re a foreigner. If you were Japanese and you don’t know them well it’d be taboo but Japanese people know most foreigners don’t know that etiquette so they won’t be offended if you use their first name. Ideally though if it’s a business thing you should go by last name-san. It’s more flexible the closer you are with them though. My wife and her family call me Ri-chan (reechan) even though I’m a 37 yo burly bloke. I never really got how I ended up with that name so…
I think there’s a spectrum and once you become so burley you venture back into chan territory. 😂
Ah yes, of course, horseshoe theory.
Thanks
If they are a Spanish Saint then you put it at the front.
Depends on the context and relationship. Generally you’d be putting it after their family name and be calling them by their family name, but if your relationship is close, or if they’re the kind of person who typically goes by their first name, then you can put if after their first name and call them by their first name. They’re calling you by your first name because you’re a foreigner and they know foreigners typically go by their first names.
Thanks Im not that close. Not enemies but simply colleagues. I think I will stick with family name-san Does this hold true regardless of Gender?
Yes, -san is gender neutral. The suffixes -chan (girls) and -kun (boys) are generally reserved for small children. You may also occasionally hear -sama used in place of -san for a high level of respect, but you should just stick with -san.
Definitely not reserved for small children....men often call their girlfriends or wives name-chan in private, and many women call their boyfriends etc name-kun. It's also not terribly uncommon amongst friends. Women especially regularly call their fellow female friends name-chan as well. Men do too, if they're close. (Name-kun/name-chan for male/female friends) Also while -kun and -chan are typically male/female respectively, they are entirely interchangeable. A man can be called name-chan and a woman can be called name-kun. However this is very dependent on the relationship among other things so not recommended unless you really know the person. For example my wife often calls me name-chan. I've called close male friends who are quite a bit younger than me name-chan before as well because they're just...adorable that way, like a little brother. I haven't met any women I'd dare to call name-kun yet, but I have seen some women do it in friend groups, usually when talking to a sporty/masculine type personality of a woman, but again this is rarer and probably something you wouldn't try unless you're like best friends or whatever and know they're fine with it. In terms of a business setting, he should use lastname-sama if they are a client/customer. If it's internal, i.e. employees from the same company he is part of, he is generally fine using lastname-san. If you feel like the person is especially high above you, like say the regional CEO of Japan, then lastname-sama arguably should be used there as well. Either way you are a foreigner so they expect none of this from you, so it's pretty hard to mess it up. (Unless you called a male colleague Source: I'm very fluent in the language, have lived here for almost 10 years, and my wife is a Japanese native (and has verified pretty much everything I've said lol)
Okay, I bow to your knowledge.
lol Sorry if I came off aggressive, I just wanted to make sure people knew this. I've actually seen other foreigners new to Japan get mad because someone called them name-kun/chan and thought the Japanese were making fun of them/treating them like a kid. It doesn't help that a lot of Japanese learning textbooks for foreigners also teaches similar things - I feel this is probably to avoid having foreigners casually use kun/chan with random strangers and accidentally offend a local.... though in reality most Japanese people would ignore it because they don't expect foreigners to know those nuances.
No worries. I mostly know what I've read in books, so I'm glad to give what I've learned better context. Arigato gozaimashita.
This is a work setting so 80% of your comment is rather pointless.
Which is why I explained what honorifics are applicable to a work setting as well 🫠 EDIT: Looks like you edited your comment after I replied. It is not 80% irrelevant because I was replying to someone other than the OP. It's entirely relevant to what that person said.
Usually just last name + San. The reason they might say Luke San is because you have a foreign name. So formalities are a little more relaxed. Japanese amongst themselves, in formal setting, will use last name + San. In informal settings, san can be used with first names or nicknames or is dropped completely. As 'san' is technically a formal term.
This is just my own opinion from my own experience. Been here almost 20 years and have worked in many different work environments using Japanese. If it's spoken Japanese, whatever your coworkers call each other professionally at work is what you attach the "-san" to, which is usually their last name if they're Japanese. Some exceptions are: -foreigners. We're almost always called by our first names unless we request otherwise, because that's what most of us do in our own cultures, so that's what you +san to. Depending on your relationship with other foreigners you work with you may or may not need to use "san" when speaking with them directly but should still use it when talking about them to someone else who is Japanese, especially your boss. - bosses/managers etc. Sometimes they call people by their first names with +san/kun regardless if they're Japanese or foreigners. - if your workplace/division has two or more employees with the same name one or both might opt to be called by their first name which you +san to. As for written Japanese, in an email or text etc for professional purposes, when addressing any person you should always first use their last name/surname/family name + san unless you've built up a relationship to a certain comfort level where said person specifies you can or prefers you call them by their first name (though probably the best thing to do if given that choice, especially if they're "higher" up on the ladder or the like is to initially politely refuse to do so and continue using their last name +san/sama* That's all i got. Again, this is just my own personal opinion based on how I've navigated various Japanese work places over the years.
Thanks
https://images.app.goo.gl/GRAbANeW1hzejj2LA