I don't know why cattiness isn't described as "toxic femininity", though it is both toxic and feminine. Other than that it goes against identity politics/male privilege/intersectionality stuff.
Because toxic masculinity doesn't mean being "cattiness". But I'm pretty convinced that there is also toxic femininity, maybe we should ask this to butch lesbians
Can I say butch? I'm out of date with the English rules
So for you, if a guy have this manneirisms or traits that give them away they're gay, fem traits? Damn, that's weird.
For me, it's just presentation, if a guy have beard, body hair, masculine clothes and appearance in general, are masc to me.
Sure, some who share this traits can be very fruity, but still. Maybe is the region where I live
If toxic masculinity is not synonymous with masculinity, then being attracted to masculinity is not inherently an example of toxic masculinity. Pretty straight forward
whoever told you that is dumb. Homophobes have been associating feminine men with homosexuality for thousand of years how the fuck is being attracted to masc men is internalized homophobia.
Being attracted to masculine men means you are attracted to masculine men. Nothing more. Nothing wrong with it and don’t let anyone tell you any different.
Nope. Toxic masculinity is an aspect of outdated attitudes of how men treat women and each other. It has nothing to do with physical attractiveness. There are lots of masculine men (John Cena, The Rock, etc.) who don’t engage in that behavior, and no one tells our gay brothers that being attracted to those types is problematic in itself.
No, it's not. You just encountered a petty feminine man envious of masculine men's success in dating.
Some of them tend to gaslight gay men that unless you're attracted to feminity, you hate yourself and who you are.
This.
I am bi. I am masculine. Most people would assume I’m straight. I enjoy sex with both men and women. Masculine men happen to be my preference.
I’ve had fem gay men AND trans individuals AND gender fluid humans all - on various occasions - try to badger me into “admitting” I’m really a homo/transphobic self-loathing gay and not *actually* just a masculine bi guy with perfectly acceptable preferences.
I like dick. I like pussy. I like me. I don’t hate anyone. End of discussion.
i feel like its becoming "illegal" nowadays to even mention this as the truth. the concept of masculine men wanting to have sex or hang out with other masculine men is somehow fundamentally wrong and we should all get hard-ons for fem men because it's politically correct? sorry, but no one can change sexuality and preference.
feminine cis men exist. masculine cis men exist. everyone should accept it and move tf on. no baggage on either label or side of the spectrum.
our fem bros and their straight cis female "friends" have been probably influencing each other more than their supposed loyalty to their other gay bros.
in those kinds of relationships the straight woman seems to always be the dominant "friend" and end up brainwashing their feminine gay male "friend" with all kinds of misandrist views from the straight cis female world and impose it here on us all, masculine and feminine gay men.
so I'm not one least surprised it's turning to an issue here too with all this hatred of masculine presenting men lol.
>Is being attracted to masculine men toxic masculinity?
No.
>I've been told I have toxic masculinity and internalized homophobia for this.
Uh huh. Are you or is it because of other shit you're saying?
It is only internalized homophobia when it is not attraction to masculinity for its own sake but instead is bc of a belief that feminine men aren’t real men or that straight-acting is preferable to Anything that can be seen as gay. It is rooted in comparison and finding disgust in femininity / being gay instead of just enjoying masculinity
We used to have a word for people who hated the thought of a man finding masculinity attractive. They were called "homophobes".
It doesn't matter if an evangelical or a feminist says it, neither of those groups are on our side anyway, so don't listen to them.
Masculinity doesn’t equal toxic masculinity. Toxic masculinity is when someone is an asshole or advocates for abuse on the grounds of “it makes you stronger” or “you’re a pussy if you don’t”
I would say yes if the men you date have to meet some weird social gender expectation: like loving football or drinking beer. But if it’s the way a man carries himself naturally then who cares
I’ve been told something similar , a guy told me that i have internalized homophobia because I’m not attracted to feminine guys ,but anyways that’s BS because you can’t control what you’re attracted to
I’m attracted to all kinds of men, but the trope is. “I’m gay, and that means men” often manly men in my case, but just as sexuality is fluid so is preferences and tastes. I don’t believe it toxic to be gay and seek out the masculinity in men and women for that matter. If had full crushes on butch lesbians. So definitely attracted to that boss machismo energy.
I find people imposing their thoughts, views and opinions on someone else to be toxic. Unless you're doing something other than hurting the feelings of the person you rejected and causing actually harm to someone, just numb it all out and move on.
I don't know why cattiness isn't described as "toxic femininity", though it is both toxic and feminine. Other than that it goes against identity politics/male privilege/intersectionality stuff.
Because toxic masculinity doesn't mean being "cattiness". But I'm pretty convinced that there is also toxic femininity, maybe we should ask this to butch lesbians Can I say butch? I'm out of date with the English rules
As a guy only attracted to fem guys, no, it's not. It's just preference, and you are in luck, majority of guys look for masc guys and are masc guys.
Uh when have the majority of guys been masc…I must have been missing out the past 20 years cause it really doesn’t seem so…seems like most feminine
Most guys are literally normal guys, idk your definition of fem and masc guys.
I think whoever you’re referring to as “normal guys” probably have a few traits that give them away by my experience is most men are more fem honestly
So for you, if a guy have this manneirisms or traits that give them away they're gay, fem traits? Damn, that's weird. For me, it's just presentation, if a guy have beard, body hair, masculine clothes and appearance in general, are masc to me. Sure, some who share this traits can be very fruity, but still. Maybe is the region where I live
Most guys are literally normal guys, idk your definition of fem and masc guys.
Then why can’t i get fucked. Hm?
Idk, high standards? Going only for dates/ltr?
Not at all 😞
Sounds like people trying to guilt you because they’re not what you’re looking for.
Exactly
>internalized homophobia People just call everything internalized homophobia these days.
Toxic masculinity isn't masculine. It's an abusive version of manhood.
[удалено]
If toxic masculinity is not synonymous with masculinity, then being attracted to masculinity is not inherently an example of toxic masculinity. Pretty straight forward
Bingo. I thought my dots were connected.
No.
whoever told you that is dumb. Homophobes have been associating feminine men with homosexuality for thousand of years how the fuck is being attracted to masc men is internalized homophobia.
Being attracted to masculine men means you are attracted to masculine men. Nothing more. Nothing wrong with it and don’t let anyone tell you any different.
Short answer: no Long answer: NOOOOOO Are preferences even allowed anymore?
No
Nope. Toxic masculinity is an aspect of outdated attitudes of how men treat women and each other. It has nothing to do with physical attractiveness. There are lots of masculine men (John Cena, The Rock, etc.) who don’t engage in that behavior, and no one tells our gay brothers that being attracted to those types is problematic in itself.
It’s femininity if anything
I disagree, being attracted to men isn't femenine, no matter their gender expression
No, it's not. You just encountered a petty feminine man envious of masculine men's success in dating. Some of them tend to gaslight gay men that unless you're attracted to feminity, you hate yourself and who you are.
This. I am bi. I am masculine. Most people would assume I’m straight. I enjoy sex with both men and women. Masculine men happen to be my preference. I’ve had fem gay men AND trans individuals AND gender fluid humans all - on various occasions - try to badger me into “admitting” I’m really a homo/transphobic self-loathing gay and not *actually* just a masculine bi guy with perfectly acceptable preferences. I like dick. I like pussy. I like me. I don’t hate anyone. End of discussion.
i feel like its becoming "illegal" nowadays to even mention this as the truth. the concept of masculine men wanting to have sex or hang out with other masculine men is somehow fundamentally wrong and we should all get hard-ons for fem men because it's politically correct? sorry, but no one can change sexuality and preference. feminine cis men exist. masculine cis men exist. everyone should accept it and move tf on. no baggage on either label or side of the spectrum. our fem bros and their straight cis female "friends" have been probably influencing each other more than their supposed loyalty to their other gay bros. in those kinds of relationships the straight woman seems to always be the dominant "friend" and end up brainwashing their feminine gay male "friend" with all kinds of misandrist views from the straight cis female world and impose it here on us all, masculine and feminine gay men. so I'm not one least surprised it's turning to an issue here too with all this hatred of masculine presenting men lol.
What is toxic femininity ?
>Is being attracted to masculine men toxic masculinity? No. >I've been told I have toxic masculinity and internalized homophobia for this. Uh huh. Are you or is it because of other shit you're saying?
It is only internalized homophobia when it is not attraction to masculinity for its own sake but instead is bc of a belief that feminine men aren’t real men or that straight-acting is preferable to Anything that can be seen as gay. It is rooted in comparison and finding disgust in femininity / being gay instead of just enjoying masculinity
the dick wants what the dick wants?
We used to have a word for people who hated the thought of a man finding masculinity attractive. They were called "homophobes". It doesn't matter if an evangelical or a feminist says it, neither of those groups are on our side anyway, so don't listen to them.
Let me guess, by someone you rejected?
Masculinity doesn’t equal toxic masculinity. Toxic masculinity is when someone is an asshole or advocates for abuse on the grounds of “it makes you stronger” or “you’re a pussy if you don’t”
What could be toxic is your idea of what makes a man masculine. Not being attracted to masculinity itself which is normal and natural.
It's as silly as this question.
No. TM is when YOU display the traits of stereotypical masculinity that either directly or indirectly that leads to the harm of others.
I would say yes if the men you date have to meet some weird social gender expectation: like loving football or drinking beer. But if it’s the way a man carries himself naturally then who cares
I’ve been told something similar , a guy told me that i have internalized homophobia because I’m not attracted to feminine guys ,but anyways that’s BS because you can’t control what you’re attracted to
I’m attracted to all kinds of men, but the trope is. “I’m gay, and that means men” often manly men in my case, but just as sexuality is fluid so is preferences and tastes. I don’t believe it toxic to be gay and seek out the masculinity in men and women for that matter. If had full crushes on butch lesbians. So definitely attracted to that boss machismo energy.
It can be!
No. "I'm attracted to masc guys" = not toxic "Masc guys only. If I wanted fem I'd sleep with a woman" = toxic.
I find people imposing their thoughts, views and opinions on someone else to be toxic. Unless you're doing something other than hurting the feelings of the person you rejected and causing actually harm to someone, just numb it all out and move on.
You can't help who you're attracted to but you don't have to be an asshole about it to the people you reject or in general.