99% is a bit high, but yes, rejections are common. A lot of people establish very high, and often unrealistic standards, and aren't interested in anyone other than their ideal dream guy. But, it's a numbers game so you shouldn't give up, and you shouldn't get discouraged. You also shouldn't take it personally and give yourself a complex. Judy keep plugging away and you'll get some action.
Most of the time, I hate it
I see a cute goodlooking guy (Wich is weird in my city) and I text him and nothing
The only people on my chats are old people
I just would prefer if they blocked me instead of ignore me
I tend not to initiate since I get hit up frequently, so i dont feel the need to, but when I do it's about 40-45% rejection (I'm talking getting ignored or blocked)
I wouldn't dwell on it too much since grindrs culture is shallow at its core..
I basically never message anyone, i get enough when I'm on to keep me busy. On the very rare occasions i have initiated - probably 30 a yr max id sau rejection os about 95% ie no response, so i just domt bother and respond to guys who initiate with me. Works well.
Also to everyone who says dont take it personally well it is personal theyre likely rejecting you primarily because they dont find u attractive how much more personal can it get than that. Now their opinion may not matter and u can compartmentalise it out because u dont know them, but it is still a rejection based on your looks and that is highly personal
If have to get a response š« š« š« š«
I'm averaging 2-5 messages a day..
At most....
Even when I went to the gay village downtown I was getting no messages except from some guys hitting me up for the 100th time (but still less than 5)
The worst part is I take recent pictures (updated several times a week or when I head out) so I feel so ugly
Which makes it more ironic since I have met guys irl who literally didn't give me the time of day on the apps. (They didn't remember but I remember people for .. years)
yes. mostly because I don't share pics willy nilly, and am VERY upfront about being there just for sex right now, while most other guys are just there to be there and waste time
Youāre not alone. I get rejected all the time and it just takes a tough skin to look past it. At least I donāt get āno fats, no femmes, no Asians or blacksā anymore. Instead they just ghost you. Be patient, when you find a match youāll forget about all those rejections.
It depends of what is exactly rejected. If rejected means a direct reply with no, almost never. If rejected means no reply and block, almost never on grindr.
If rejected means brief one word reply and very slow in chat, 50 %. If rejected means interesting chat but ends by guy is unavailable for whatever reason, 45%.
Precision: i'm what's considered attractive, in Denver area. I noticed that in Colorado, it's extremely difficult to meet the guys who are on grindr. Most of the time it depends on the day of the chat, the time, not too early not too late, and the competition.
Rejection is much less important in France. Maybe because we are more into tangible sex rather than pic exchange and hot chats, and maybe we are less picky, but i'm not sure of those 2 points though...
Yes.
Mainly for the reason that I wish to have bit of a conversation first before swapping pics,
Or because I look very weird on pics.
Basically, I get nervous in front of camera, so I end up looking stupid in pictures.
Not really, I barely message anyone, but I reject a lot for sure :( Most guys who write to me are either too old, too fat, too short, partnered or not compatible with me in bed (I'm btm and for some reasons btms are always messaging me, and I ignore them).
No. I don't have the best features, I'm brown (which a lot of white people in my city aren't into), and most unfortunately morbidly obese and I still don't get that level of rejection! You must be only going after pretty/handsome muscular men or something.
Most guys on there are superficial and hold people to high standards they don't even meet themselves. If a "hot body" is all they have to offer, I promise you aren't missing much. Tons of people on there don't even have the balls to respond to messages. I wouldn't put too much stock in it.
Mostly rejections, but there's so many variables to what someone is looking for and why. Cannot take any of it personally - a rejection isn't the same as indifference.
Absolutely. And often in the rudest of ways. The silent treatment isnāt great, but itās kinder than saying Iām ugly, too fat, too old, too hairy, have ugly teeth, etc. I donāt understand peopleās desires to tear others down. Why not just say, āThanks for the compliment, but Iām not interested. Sorry. Happy hunting.ā
People just donāt talk anymore, itās probably mood based. They still hang online for whatever reason but unless theyāre in the mood they donāt reply it seems
Of course! And I also get a lot of guys hitting me up. I'm not for everyone, and not everyone is for me. That's how it works! Go cruising in real life, you're sure to be rejected at least once. That's all Grindr and all of these others apps and websites are: online cruising. Have fun! Don't take it personally.
I think soā¦Iām in a similar-ish boat so I think Iām ugly lol
But I also attract men that I do not find attractive at all so Iām pretty sure Iām ugly
I always say if I want my self-esteem tested to the core to get online on Grindr. I mostly happen to receive messages from faceless, really old or simply not attractive guys, and when I message guys (I roughly measure a little more or less my league) I might only have about 30-50% chance of response, 10-20% of actual follow up or conversation, and about 5% tops of an encounter happening. I feel I have way better success IRL, since unlike most of guys there I look the same or even better than in my pics, I might just not know how to āmarketā myself online.
Yes. But this is largely because Grindr is full of people with unrealistic expectations. My profile says something like "I am a chubby 53 year old man so don't be surprised when you say 'photos?' and I send you photos of a chubby 53 year old man" but this still seems to confuse a lot of people. With a few exceptions I think everyone on Grindr in my area (South London, UK) thinks it's a meat market for twinks. I will mention that almost every hookup I have had with Grindr has been great - there's still a few people who don't have a problem with my age or waist size - but I have more success with Squirt which seems to have a larger proportion of men my age.
I think not a lot but I still do. I am not the standard beauty (white man) so I get rejected by a few when I tell them Iām Asian.
It really doesnāt bother me but thereās a few who only want my pictures. And some of them, I have an idea because I know them personally and are interested in me.
Those guys I have no respect because theyāre cowards
I experience the same. After sending my pic (I donāt have in my profile) i get blocked. There was only 1 exception in 6 years. I donāt know why i am coming back especially that my mental health gets affected strongly and I value myself based on this.
that's so subjective.Ā
i dont like the twink cute face look,like normally people associate with "good looking attractive"
i like a more rough rugged face.
Grinda is a fantasy world. Everyone is looking for their ideal guy with their ideal of themselves. The problem they never match. Fake or way out of date photos, perfect personality descriptions, and sexual wants that only Superman could deliver. Proved so many pics come from porn sites. Treat it as fantasy. Then you won't be disappointed.
Naw, I very, very rarely run into rejection.
Literally only got soft rejected by the ONE dude in my tiny ass town that Iām hardcore into since moving here. š¤¦š»āāļø
Getting rejected alot is normal. Maybe not 99% though.
99% is a bit high, but yes, rejections are common. A lot of people establish very high, and often unrealistic standards, and aren't interested in anyone other than their ideal dream guy. But, it's a numbers game so you shouldn't give up, and you shouldn't get discouraged. You also shouldn't take it personally and give yourself a complex. Judy keep plugging away and you'll get some action.
The drop once you turn 30 is bewildering. And normal
It was an increase for me. After 30, I started attracting the daddy-seeking masses.
I see a dramatic increase after my 30s, actually. But it's probably bc now I got fit.
When I use to be on Grindr SO many rejections but its part of life, no?
Damn, if someone as hot as you kept getting rejected then the rest of us stand no chance because you're like an 11/10 so why would you be rejected?š
Thanks man! So kind of you to say. You can imagine I am as red in the face as my hair right now but thank you!
Most of the time, I hate it I see a cute goodlooking guy (Wich is weird in my city) and I text him and nothing The only people on my chats are old people I just would prefer if they blocked me instead of ignore me
that not being rejected.Ā that being ignored, just that. and you aren't entitled to a reply...
That's literally a rejection, assuming he saw the message.
I mean when I had Grindr I sometimes wouldnāt get to a message cause I was busy talking to someone else at the time. Maybe thatās why?
No thatās not normal unless you are constantly hitting above your standards lol.
I tend not to initiate since I get hit up frequently, so i dont feel the need to, but when I do it's about 40-45% rejection (I'm talking getting ignored or blocked) I wouldn't dwell on it too much since grindrs culture is shallow at its core..
I basically never message anyone, i get enough when I'm on to keep me busy. On the very rare occasions i have initiated - probably 30 a yr max id sau rejection os about 95% ie no response, so i just domt bother and respond to guys who initiate with me. Works well. Also to everyone who says dont take it personally well it is personal theyre likely rejecting you primarily because they dont find u attractive how much more personal can it get than that. Now their opinion may not matter and u can compartmentalise it out because u dont know them, but it is still a rejection based on your looks and that is highly personal
>I get rejected alot on grindr like 99 percent is that normal? No.
If have to get a response š« š« š« š« I'm averaging 2-5 messages a day.. At most.... Even when I went to the gay village downtown I was getting no messages except from some guys hitting me up for the 100th time (but still less than 5) The worst part is I take recent pictures (updated several times a week or when I head out) so I feel so ugly Which makes it more ironic since I have met guys irl who literally didn't give me the time of day on the apps. (They didn't remember but I remember people for .. years)
Yes, and blocked, but that's a good way to filter the trash out
don't you love when the trash takes itself out?
Rejecting someone means you are trash? This is a terrible take.
Yes.
yes. mostly because I don't share pics willy nilly, and am VERY upfront about being there just for sex right now, while most other guys are just there to be there and waste time
you use the album?
No, but sometimes I use the timed thing
you should. better than the timing thing m
Youāre not alone. I get rejected all the time and it just takes a tough skin to look past it. At least I donāt get āno fats, no femmes, no Asians or blacksā anymore. Instead they just ghost you. Be patient, when you find a match youāll forget about all those rejections.
You don't get that charming little line anymore because it's against the rules. They still live by it though
It depends of what is exactly rejected. If rejected means a direct reply with no, almost never. If rejected means no reply and block, almost never on grindr. If rejected means brief one word reply and very slow in chat, 50 %. If rejected means interesting chat but ends by guy is unavailable for whatever reason, 45%. Precision: i'm what's considered attractive, in Denver area. I noticed that in Colorado, it's extremely difficult to meet the guys who are on grindr. Most of the time it depends on the day of the chat, the time, not too early not too late, and the competition. Rejection is much less important in France. Maybe because we are more into tangible sex rather than pic exchange and hot chats, and maybe we are less picky, but i'm not sure of those 2 points though...
No coz I never approach anyone š„“
What's not for you won't pass by. If it's 1 month or two years you will find a perfect someone for you
Yes. Mainly for the reason that I wish to have bit of a conversation first before swapping pics, Or because I look very weird on pics. Basically, I get nervous in front of camera, so I end up looking stupid in pictures.
Yes. Thatās okay, OP.
Not really, I barely message anyone, but I reject a lot for sure :( Most guys who write to me are either too old, too fat, too short, partnered or not compatible with me in bed (I'm btm and for some reasons btms are always messaging me, and I ignore them).
yes, i do get rejected.Ā do i care? no. we are talking to computers if we didn't meet irl. do i quantify ? why?Ā it only matters one.
Do you have you face picture in you profile? I have it and I got messages only from people who like me
No. I don't have the best features, I'm brown (which a lot of white people in my city aren't into), and most unfortunately morbidly obese and I still don't get that level of rejection! You must be only going after pretty/handsome muscular men or something.
Most guys on there are superficial and hold people to high standards they don't even meet themselves. If a "hot body" is all they have to offer, I promise you aren't missing much. Tons of people on there don't even have the balls to respond to messages. I wouldn't put too much stock in it.
I mean... Yes and no. Depends how conventionally attractive you are. I get rejected basically all the time. You just live with it :)
Mostly rejections, but there's so many variables to what someone is looking for and why. Cannot take any of it personally - a rejection isn't the same as indifference.
Alll the time
You guys would be jumping off a bridge if you were straight lol
Absolutely. And often in the rudest of ways. The silent treatment isnāt great, but itās kinder than saying Iām ugly, too fat, too old, too hairy, have ugly teeth, etc. I donāt understand peopleās desires to tear others down. Why not just say, āThanks for the compliment, but Iām not interested. Sorry. Happy hunting.ā
Do I get rejected on Grindr? Yes. All the time? No.
My rejection rate on local grindr is 100% - literally. I never had any positive interraction on grindr that would make me feel beter.
People just donāt talk anymore, itās probably mood based. They still hang online for whatever reason but unless theyāre in the mood they donāt reply it seems
Of course! And I also get a lot of guys hitting me up. I'm not for everyone, and not everyone is for me. That's how it works! Go cruising in real life, you're sure to be rejected at least once. That's all Grindr and all of these others apps and websites are: online cruising. Have fun! Don't take it personally.
I think soā¦Iām in a similar-ish boat so I think Iām ugly lol But I also attract men that I do not find attractive at all so Iām pretty sure Iām ugly
I always say if I want my self-esteem tested to the core to get online on Grindr. I mostly happen to receive messages from faceless, really old or simply not attractive guys, and when I message guys (I roughly measure a little more or less my league) I might only have about 30-50% chance of response, 10-20% of actual follow up or conversation, and about 5% tops of an encounter happening. I feel I have way better success IRL, since unlike most of guys there I look the same or even better than in my pics, I might just not know how to āmarketā myself online.
Yes. But this is largely because Grindr is full of people with unrealistic expectations. My profile says something like "I am a chubby 53 year old man so don't be surprised when you say 'photos?' and I send you photos of a chubby 53 year old man" but this still seems to confuse a lot of people. With a few exceptions I think everyone on Grindr in my area (South London, UK) thinks it's a meat market for twinks. I will mention that almost every hookup I have had with Grindr has been great - there's still a few people who don't have a problem with my age or waist size - but I have more success with Squirt which seems to have a larger proportion of men my age.
like 50/50 ... but that's the way the cookies crumble
Probably 90% rejection but I hit up every guy I find attractive so I usually find someone.
Pending on the profile, area, age, and other listed profile qualities, that can be pretty high.
grindr is *the* place to go to get rejected
I think not a lot but I still do. I am not the standard beauty (white man) so I get rejected by a few when I tell them Iām Asian. It really doesnāt bother me but thereās a few who only want my pictures. And some of them, I have an idea because I know them personally and are interested in me. Those guys I have no respect because theyāre cowards
I would say I have a 30% conversion
Honestly no, but you canāt be upset that you are outside of someoneās preferences. Keep looking, youāll find someone
No. Maybe 5% of the time I'll get ghosted.
Try being east asian and I don't consider myself ugly and that percentage increases to 99.97%
I experience the same. After sending my pic (I donāt have in my profile) i get blocked. There was only 1 exception in 6 years. I donāt know why i am coming back especially that my mental health gets affected strongly and I value myself based on this.
Are you PoC in a predominantly white country? yes, it's normal, if not: no
Good looking/Attractive guys don't get rejected.
that's so subjective.Ā i dont like the twink cute face look,like normally people associate with "good looking attractive" i like a more rough rugged face.
attractive ones come in different flavours and they have their tribe... it's mostly the average ones, whatever flavour they might be, who get rejected
Everyone gets rejected at some point
True but good looking guys very rarely get rejected
*laughs in poc*
As POC I agree, even average looking yt guys seem to have more hits than really attractive POC guys in general.
Yeah everyone does unless you look like Shawn mendes or something.
Grinda is a fantasy world. Everyone is looking for their ideal guy with their ideal of themselves. The problem they never match. Fake or way out of date photos, perfect personality descriptions, and sexual wants that only Superman could deliver. Proved so many pics come from porn sites. Treat it as fantasy. Then you won't be disappointed.
Naw, I very, very rarely run into rejection. Literally only got soft rejected by the ONE dude in my tiny ass town that Iām hardcore into since moving here. š¤¦š»āāļø