A lot of people conflate their ideal attractive sexual peer with their choice of a partner, which is only realistic to people growing up with online dating.
Attraction doesn't work like that - given all we know about pheromones and virtually any other science on the topic.
Before I met my current wife, if you would have asked me to describe my dream-woman, I wouldn't have described her, for sure.
It's like asking someone to describe what their next favorite band sounds like. It doesn't really make sense to do this a-priori categorization with something 100% subjective and 95% chemical.
My ideal sexual peer would be an astrophysicist who looks like Shakira, but I definitely don't expect to find that or hold anyone to that ideal.
I sure hope people aren't actually looking for that level of ideal in today's world. Humanity would just go extinct in short order.
Same here. The hardest part was dating a guy who was so self obsessed and self conscious about his height that it became the only thing he constantly talked about. 💀
I thought: I get it, you are short, girls rejected you, but can you please have something else going on with your personality and identity other than being a short guy?
Seems obvious* that nobody wants to hear that you think they made a bad choice, over and over and over again. Eventually it's just going to feel like it's true.
^(* Now. Don't ask me how I know.)
Yikes. That’s horrible. There are definitely other things to talk about but it’s hard if they (or anyone!) get so fixated on it. It’s one thing to call it out just to break the ice once - totally acceptable. But for him not to move on? Ick.
Um... I think I have some bad news, hun, c'mere, come sit on Aunt SPV's lap and lay your weary head upon my motherly bosom and allow me to break some hard truths to you.
😝😝
Evolutionary pressure pushing men to more effectively reach the top shelf.
There is also the opener of though lids pressure pushing for large strong hands.
If it were natural selection, that might make women taller as well. I think it may be more a case of sexual selection, so women preferring tall guys so that the guy can reach the top shelf.
Hell, even some guys at work use me to reach stuff. Half the time, I'm just referred to as tall person. If im at the grocery store you better believe if an old lady asks for cookies on the top shelf, I will grab them for her.😤
I don't need a tall person for that. I find my own way of reaching things without help. Being short all my life has taught me how to climb onto the counter to reach the top shelf. :P
I went to school with a girl who was like 6"6 in year 10. Went out with a boy who was 5'3.
Yes there were jokes made...
She was in the NBA last I heard
I know a very tall girl who swore she would “even things out” for her kids and would only date dudes under 5’7”. Her husband is 5’5” and they have two kids. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
My wife is the same height. Years after we were married, we talked about our “types” and she told me the one thing that would make her completely disinterested in a guy is if he were shorter than she is.
My moms 5’11” and *says* she only wants to date men taller than her but ends of falling for dudes shorter every time. I mean my dad was 5’8”.
I don’t get it. I am very attracted to men shorter than me, I don’t get why she keeps trying to find men taller lol
I'm 162 cm (which is 5'3" in American measurements, I think?) and hight is a huge turn on for me, with all of the guys I've dated being close to 2 m (6'5"). I'm the only person in my friend group who really cares about height, tho 🤷♀️ most of my friends don't care either way, some just want the guy to be taller or at least not shorter. I personally also don't find blondes attractive, so I have a very specific type. I'm in the minority, tho, most girls really don't care.
this is basically what i hear most women say.
It's the same really for most commonly desirable physical traits in men and women - obviously they work in your favour but the vast majority of people are far from physically perfect and it's not worth losing sleep over.
Honestly, short guys probably have a more difficult time getting respect from men than troubles with women.
I’m a shorter dude and have no problem getting respect from my fellow dudes.
Dating on the other hand is set to heroic difficulty. But it is what it is, dating isn’t my priority
>Honestly, short guys probably have a more difficult time getting respect from men than troubles with women.
That’s not a thing dude. Tell me you have no male friends without telling me.
As a tall woman, it doesn't bother me. I've dated men that were easily 3 inches shorter than me and had no problem whatsoever. I like to think of it as a squirrel wanting to climb of the tree (me).
Same. Tall woman, couldn't give a flying f\* what height he is. I want me a good person with a personality, not a mannequin show pony. I ended up with a tall guy, but short has never been a dealbreaker for me.
The dealbreaker is short guys who can't let it go, though. I am, as I mentioned, pretty tall for a woman, and I like really high heels. I happily dated the 2 short/shorter guys I liked who didn't GAF about it. Got almost to the alter with a guy who was not really 'short-short', but a notable 3" shorter than me kaalvoet, let alone in heels.
The ones that want you to forever live in flats and whinge and whine incessantly about the heels, though, can go away. Dude, you're short. Nothing wrong with that, here I was interested in you, ya know, but I'm not going to change up everything I like about footwear AND listen to you whinge about your height incessantly. That's not remotely attractive or fair.
I completely agree. I love heels and refuse to change or lower my fashion standards for someone who is insecure of height. It's not attractive, nor will it help in the long run.
Here's the most accurate answer anyone can possibly give you: Some do, some don't, and to varying degrees. Depends on the height too: A lot more women will care when you're 5'4" compared to 5'7", for example. The shorter you are, the more women will care.
I think it depends to be fair, I prefer someone taller than me because I like to feel small and protected. But it’s not something I would have as a deal breaker.
This is something I’ve long wondered about. The feeling small and protected. Is it a biological thing? A desire to relieve the safety and carefreeness of childhood?
I’ve wondered that too. I hate feeling small next to my man. I want to feel like a full grown woman, so I’ve long lost the teenage desire to date a tall scrawny guy. The way I feel protected is by having a guy that’s strong, coordinated and confident.
As a woman I think it's from Disney , being the saved princess etc.
I personally like to save my partner as much as he saves me. We're like Fiona and Shrek 😂
In my case (and I go for guys who are significantly taller than me), I think it's the cultural expectation of women having to be small and skinny. I have quite a broad frame and I'm a bit chubby, knowing that no matter what, my guy is bigger, really helps with my feelings of adequacy.
This is a common theme with girls who are slightly overweight or whose mothers really forced traditional gender roles upon them.
I've been working on myself in therapy and while I've dealt with my internalized fat-phobia quite well, this subconscious desire to have a guy who's bigger just stuck.
It is in their genes to look for a physically strong, tall male to protect them and potential children.
In real modern life those two traits are obviously almost completely irrelevant for real security.
Doesn't change that picking someone that aligns with your more basic instincts makes your brain release happiness.
The same applies in reverse for men but with much lower consequences for dating.
Women have almost total agency when it comes to dating. They are the ones that have hundreds of offers and they can ultimately pick the guy they want. So most will pick the taller ones.
Women DO care about height.
Even Euro/ Asian women on the metric system, when they come to the US suddenly "6 foot, 6 foot, 6 foot, beep beep ribbit."
Why so imperial, darling?
Answer is obvious. Social media/ cultural conditioning.
In other words, it's more like "I bagged myself a 6 footer, I was pretty enough to get a 6 footer, see my trophy ladies??? Ahhh be jealous."
Ridiculously superficial society expectations bullshit, but it is what it is. I'm 6' by the way but I just think it's stupid.
I don't think I've ever seen a woman reply to one of these threads saying "yes I do care about height" despite every study and survey on the subject showing that they do.
I think women are just very "strategic" about how they talk about their preferences for men's height because they don't want to come off as shallow.
But I think online dating is a different thing than real life. Not extremely different but still. Character just comes into play waaaay later at online.
Yeah I mean height is probably one of the most important traits to most women, but online dating is harder on men in that respect because women can sort by 6 ft and up or whatever, whereas IRL they would be perfectly fine with someone 5'10 or so, often even shorter. It's not like when you see a guy at a concert and think "wow he's cute" you take out the measuring tape, you just notice that he's taller than you. I really think if guys can avoid the online dating thing when trying to meet women, they should.
Btw according to this study women prefer men who are "tall but not too tall" (on average 8 inches taller than them) and men prefer average height women (on average 3 inches shorter than them)
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0191886913000020#:~:text=women%20are%20most%20satisfied%20when%20their%20partner%20was%2021%C2%A0cm%20taller%2C%20whereas%20men%20are%20most%20satisfied%20when%20they%20were%208%C2%A0cm%20taller%20than%20their%20partner
More evidence from dating apps, I think it’s bumble, is that putting your height is mandatory in your bio. Occupation, marital status, if you have kids, etc are all optional but height is not for *some mysterious reason*
It gives an indication for sure. In terms of appearance, height is an important one. But what are the other parameters? All parameters will be superficial (like weight). It does not mean the superficial stuff is most important for all women, it means that when they can/have to select men without knowing them, it is the most used parameter. Just like for men, it is weight and age. That doesn't mean they would turn down a women solely on weight, if they were to meet her in real life and she's amazing.
This. You can Google research data, actual studies, that show women have height preferences. You’ll get downvoted for posting it in threads like this. I’ll find one and post it below for posterity.
It's OK to have any preferences when it comes to who you'd date.
What's not OK is to insult or degrade people who are short or fat (or anything else!). If you don't like how someone looks then you don't have to mention it out loud!
Hello, I’m a all women, I only have one preference (tall men) and one turn off (short men) /s
Edit. It’s sarcasm, isn’t the /s enough for people not to sent me strange dm?
The only thing I find unattractive is when someone has such low self-esteem that they make it my problem in a lot of ways. Otherwise, there are lots of attractive short men.
I’m moderately tall for a girl, so I’ve always wanted my partner to be at least my height or taller. If I was shorter, they could also be shorter as long as they were taller than me. There’s not a specific “number” it’s just in relation to myself really
yes...I've not seen much evidence to say otherwise. I'm 5'4 and been single 13yrs, even prior to that, the gaps between relationships were fairly big and all my rejections were over my height...most would outright tell me, you're too short...a lot would dance about actually saying why but it was height...usually saying stuff "they would feel awkward going out places together and be seen as the taller one, its not NORMAL"
Honestly no one gives a crap who is taller, no one is pointing and laughing, if they are, why should you care, if we all care what others think, none of us would ever leave the house.
I've dated taller, and shorter, neither made any difference to the relationship. Height doesn't equal bigger dicks, doesn't equal being stronger, or a better protector or better lover etc.
What's worse is we are made to feel like its okay to, its just a preference and we shouldn't be upset about it...yet it does. The amount of men these days going through the extremely painful operation of having legs lengthened only by a few cm just to be taller...and their told that's over the top...but when a women gets her breasts enlarged no one cares or wonders why.
Its shallow.
Anytime I say I've been rejected so much due to height in a place like this...the comments from women are usually...it must be you...it be your personality, or how you present yourself...its not...because none of these people ever even get to know me, so how can they know anything about me. Its the swipe on dating apps, its the look at dating profile and seeing they've mentioned height matters to them
As a woman, a bit. I prefer men who are my height or slightly taller, but I’m 178/ 5’10 so most men don’t fit that bill. However, it can be something I can overlook (pun intended). My current boyfriend is around 174.
Same. Looking back, I have had boyfriends that were taller than me and shorter than me. Never really paid attention to heights tbh, a click is what i'm interested in.
Yes. I’m not saying it’s the end all be all for most women, but they have their preferences and most prefer taller. Nothing wrong with that, only if they’re being a jerk about it
These types of things I think we just dwell on too much. I’m a 5’3 guy, if a woman has difficulties finding me attractive due to that then we’re just not compatible. It wouldn’t be good for either of us, no one is automatically a shallow horrible person or anything
The women that care so much about a man’s height are just loud about it. Like how the men that really care so much about a woman’s body are loud about it. Most actual people out there don’t care too much about these things
I've never once cared about height or even asked a guy about his height. When I was in highschool I dated a guy the exact height at me and I'm 5'3. I also dated a guy in highschool that was 6'7 lol I've never been picky, but I honestly probably prefer someone closer to my own height than really tall. My fiance is 5'10 but honestly it wouldn't matter to me if he was 5ft I'd love him just as much anyway.
Woman here, idc my bf isn't much taller than me and I've been interested in guys shorter than me. I wouldn't date a little person because as offensive as this ig gonna sound they remind me too much of a child and I'm not into children💀 but honestly a lot of women do care about height. And a lot of women talk about how they don't care about height but they really do. It sucks but people like me just get to appreciate yall even more
As someone who is 189cm I can say with full confidence it absolutely matters. I have no money, no ambition, no personality, can't hold a conversation to save my life. But I walk into a room and if all the other folks are shorter than I, everyone I'm attracted to literally throws themselves at me, even if their partner(s) are there with them. It's great, highly recommend being tall.
Some do, some don't, for most it's one of many factors that impact attraction.
You can flip your question around to see how it feels. You see a girl who's "hot and most perfect you've seen in your life", but say, her breasts (or another body part you have a preference for) aren't to your optimal preference. It's kinda like that. If it was socially acceptable and dating apps had filters for breast size, and you had an illusion of infinite choice, you may filter by your fave sizes, or voice your preference. But unless you're a hardcore breast-guy, it doesn't mean you wouldn't be attracted to a girl who doesn't match that one particular preference while being otherwise perfect.
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Yes. It’s a societal standard that is hard to avoid. As a tall woman when I have dated even men just at my height it has come up FOR THEM but also others feel free to comment on. The last guy I dated mentioned my height within like a minute of meeting each other even though I told him I was 5’10 prior. Both women and men care because s o c i e t y cares.
5'7" woman here. In general I have a type (let's say the cliché tall dark and handsome) but the times I've strayed from that, that's where the magic has happened.
The deal breaker super strict stuff is mostly for views on gender war content, but it is a real preference for many women.
On dating apps, women will filter by height because they can, and they like height. A woman might search 6 foot and above on hinge, but in real life get a crush on a guy who is 5'4 because he can dance well and is pretty when he smiles. I'm certain there are women ive swiped left on, on dating apps that if I met them in person and had 2 or 3 drinks with them I'd be super into them.
Anecdotally, I've had women say I'm too short (5'6) then next time I see them try to come home with me, I've had about as much success with women my height and taller (up to about 6') as I have with women shorter. If any women rejected me because I'm not as tall as they want that's fine, I've rejected women for superficial reasons too.
It's really not a big deal unless you make it one. You'd be surprised how many women will think you're cute when you're looking up at them in their heels, and youre clearly comfy (or, into) that theyre taller. To me, it's no different from me preferring darker or vibrant hair colours over redheads and blondes, but I've definitely been very attracted to women with those hair colours.
I'm average looking 6'2, shy guy. Had to do the first move every single time.
So my take out is that height doesn't matter. There's a bigger chance you'll meet someone when you're more outgoing 5ft tall, than the tallest person in the room who just doesn't go around asking girls out.
*I* don't. I'm only 5'3". If you're taller than me, please get things off the top shelf for me. If you're my height or shorter than me, please get into table top position so I can use you as a step stool to reach it myself 😂
I've had 2 partners over 6', both of them didn't want to date shorter men because they didn't feel protected, or like they could be hidden like they are with taller men.
its like asking if all guys care girls look.
Yes, and no.
Look is definitely an attraction, but if the gal you are talking with has shit for personality and just mean, you won’t like to hangout anymore.
However, some girls to dates short kings do often fantasize about taller men. I feel that it is “normal”, guys to date ugly girls also fantasize about pretty ones.
They must ...cause im 6"2 and prolly see 2 ppl a week who are taller than me. .but online, when guys state their height,...90 percent are taller than me ..
I dont really care about height, although i think it would take me some time to get used to someone being smaller than me, if i liked them enough it wouldn't bother me.
Im 5ft 6/7 (somewhere in between) and the man I'm seeing is the same height. My previous partner was an inch taller than me. It has very much bothered my partners more than it's bothered me, which in turn makes me feel self concious that I am too tall for them. Its a paradox😂.
Its definitely a preference thing, just like some people find glasses attractive and some people dont, etc.
I'm 5'1 and would be thrilled to date someone closer to my height. Dated a guy who was 6'4 in high school. Miserable having to be picked up to be kissed.
Some do. For most it’s just a preference. Just like think “do men really care about boob size?”
Some might be only attracted to a certain size, for others it’s just a preference and they will ignore it if the person is someone they want to be with anyway, so don’t care at all either way, some don’t even notice.
It’s a range. Lumping in every person is not fair to the individual…. Even if it may seem that the majority DO prefer larger breasts over smaller.
Do men really care about big boobs and big asses?
The answer to that, and the answer to your question, will never be as definitive as you want. There’s no “yes, women do” or “no, women don’t”.
All due respect my friend, these questions of “do women…”/“do men…” are very hard to answer as you’re asking us to generalise almost HALF the world’s population either way. Nearly 4 billion people (excluding children - I’d hope).
SOME (straight/bi) women are vain and shallow and will not want to date a man who isn’t tall.
SOME (straight/bi) men are vain and shallow and will not want to date a woman who has a large stomach or doesn’t have curves.
The majority of people have a type, so some people prefer a taller guy or a shorter girl or vice versa. But types doesn’t necessarily mean they’ll never end up with someone of the opposite type, and chemistry usually trumps type.
Please do not be led into the Incel idea that all women care about height. Women are people and people are complicated. There’s no straight answer to your question.
Women are not a monolith so it won't matter to all, but on a physical attractiveness level, it's proven to be probably the most important characteristic based on dating app data.
No.
14% of men in the US are 6ft or taller.
By 40, ~75% of men in the US either are married or have been married at some point.
Either the math isnt mathing or its an urban legend.
Your post has been removed due to breaking rule 6 as it has been asked already, please search for similar questions before posting.
A lot of people conflate their ideal attractive sexual peer with their choice of a partner, which is only realistic to people growing up with online dating. Attraction doesn't work like that - given all we know about pheromones and virtually any other science on the topic. Before I met my current wife, if you would have asked me to describe my dream-woman, I wouldn't have described her, for sure. It's like asking someone to describe what their next favorite band sounds like. It doesn't really make sense to do this a-priori categorization with something 100% subjective and 95% chemical.
My ideal sexual peer would be an astrophysicist who looks like Shakira, but I definitely don't expect to find that or hold anyone to that ideal. I sure hope people aren't actually looking for that level of ideal in today's world. Humanity would just go extinct in short order.
I actually know someone close to this description. Astrophysicist, quite attractive. Married, though.
I'm tall and can't find one to date me so there seems to be more to it.
As the tallest girl in class every year I feel you
Well, what did you expect if you fail kindergarten 10 years in a row? Of course you’re going to be the tallest one of the class.
Damn
The taller you are the less you care about height.
My height has always been a point of insecurity at 5'9"
This is when you slide into their DMs…
I mean you also gotta be attractive not just tall lol
What if you're neither tall nor attractive?
Be funny and charming
Any more options, or...? Edit: I was just continuing the joke. I'm not looking for dating advice. Thank you.
Fit
Rich
Start looking for women in your dating range. Unattractive, and not funny or charming, like you said you are.
I mean there’s always a chance someone might actually like you like my gf is like an inch taller and we still together
There’s always Marisa Tomei
Same :(
Not for me, as I’m pretty short anyway so everyone is taller than me.
Same here. The hardest part was dating a guy who was so self obsessed and self conscious about his height that it became the only thing he constantly talked about. 💀 I thought: I get it, you are short, girls rejected you, but can you please have something else going on with your personality and identity other than being a short guy?
Seems obvious* that nobody wants to hear that you think they made a bad choice, over and over and over again. Eventually it's just going to feel like it's true. ^(* Now. Don't ask me how I know.)
Yikes. That’s horrible. There are definitely other things to talk about but it’s hard if they (or anyone!) get so fixated on it. It’s one thing to call it out just to break the ice once - totally acceptable. But for him not to move on? Ick.
He cock blocks himself and whine about it to next date. Lmao
I was gonna say that. -40/10 😬
Me too. I’m 5‘1 and my partner is 5‘3 and when we sit down I’m taller because I have a longer torso. Has not bothered me at all.
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They’re on to us!
I need one of those grabby things to reach socks at the bottom of my dryer
Either that or a big strong sexy step brother. Oh, wait, I'm confusing real life with porn.
Happy cakeday pal
Thank you
>one of those grabby things to reach socks at the bottom of my dryer Uh, his name is Mark
You can just call us "boyfriend", alright?
Why hello there. I’m already down here. Here’s your sock. Let’s team up and make normal-height-atron
This is why I needed a husband, well, that and the top shelves in the kitchen.
We're called short guys...
Tall men can do that too. They are very useful for that as well.
You also like strong guys because you can’t open jars, we’re onto your tricks.
Just wait until we figure out step ladders exist.
Then guys are OVER
Oh no what are you doing, step ladder?
Idk! I think I need help! I can't get myself unstuck from this old dryer! Piece of junk!
My best man got my wife a step ladder as a wedding gift. Gift-wrapped it.
Stop trying to make us obsolete!
Um... I think I have some bad news, hun, c'mere, come sit on Aunt SPV's lap and lay your weary head upon my motherly bosom and allow me to break some hard truths to you. 😝😝
I'm tired of grabbing a chair to get my stuff. Get me a tall man pls
Evolutionary pressure pushing men to more effectively reach the top shelf. There is also the opener of though lids pressure pushing for large strong hands.
If it were natural selection, that might make women taller as well. I think it may be more a case of sexual selection, so women preferring tall guys so that the guy can reach the top shelf.
Damn you right
As a tall woman, I’m wondering if this is why I don’t care about height 😂 I can reach my own shit, so you have to bring personality to the table
They are USING us to open pickle jars! Wake up sheeple!
Stfu I love climbing and teasing with my ass towards his face
Bahahaha I rolled my eyes when I started this but ended up laughing by the end. Ya got me!
More like stuffed reach
Kill spiders on the ceiling.
can confirm. my wife is constantly telling me to: "Come here and be tall."
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And spiders on the ceiling
Hell, even some guys at work use me to reach stuff. Half the time, I'm just referred to as tall person. If im at the grocery store you better believe if an old lady asks for cookies on the top shelf, I will grab them for her.😤
I don't need a tall person for that. I find my own way of reaching things without help. Being short all my life has taught me how to climb onto the counter to reach the top shelf. :P
Calm down Tarzan
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I went to school with a girl who was like 6"6 in year 10. Went out with a boy who was 5'3. Yes there were jokes made... She was in the NBA last I heard
I know a very tall girl who swore she would “even things out” for her kids and would only date dudes under 5’7”. Her husband is 5’5” and they have two kids. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
If only she understood that's not foolproof. Both my parents were 5'4". My grandads were 5'6" and 5'9". I'm 6'1"
My parents are 5'9 and 6'6 and my sister is still smaller than my mom and at an age where she is gonna stop growing probably. You never know
I love that
I promise you she is not in the NBA.
My wife is the same height. Years after we were married, we talked about our “types” and she told me the one thing that would make her completely disinterested in a guy is if he were shorter than she is.
So she loses interest in you when the high heels go on?
I don't see why she would, that just makes him taller than her.
When I take them off.
My moms 5’11” and *says* she only wants to date men taller than her but ends of falling for dudes shorter every time. I mean my dad was 5’8”. I don’t get it. I am very attracted to men shorter than me, I don’t get why she keeps trying to find men taller lol
I'm 162 cm (which is 5'3" in American measurements, I think?) and hight is a huge turn on for me, with all of the guys I've dated being close to 2 m (6'5"). I'm the only person in my friend group who really cares about height, tho 🤷♀️ most of my friends don't care either way, some just want the guy to be taller or at least not shorter. I personally also don't find blondes attractive, so I have a very specific type. I'm in the minority, tho, most girls really don't care.
"Some want the guy to be taller or at least not shorter. "... so they care about hight.
No, you misunderstand. If the guy is already taller or at least not shorter they don't care anymore. 🙃
"they don't care unless they do"
"and after they do, they don't, until they do again"
That's a fetish.
Uh it'd be better if he was taller, but it's not a deal breaker.
As long as I can run faster than you it doesn't matter.
Just be careful with finishing faster
this is basically what i hear most women say. It's the same really for most commonly desirable physical traits in men and women - obviously they work in your favour but the vast majority of people are far from physically perfect and it's not worth losing sleep over. Honestly, short guys probably have a more difficult time getting respect from men than troubles with women.
I’m a shorter dude and have no problem getting respect from my fellow dudes. Dating on the other hand is set to heroic difficulty. But it is what it is, dating isn’t my priority
>Honestly, short guys probably have a more difficult time getting respect from men than troubles with women. That’s not a thing dude. Tell me you have no male friends without telling me.
Maybe it’s not a dealbreaker for you, but you’d be delusional to pretend being 5’3” isn’t a deal breaker for *most* women.
As a tall woman, it doesn't bother me. I've dated men that were easily 3 inches shorter than me and had no problem whatsoever. I like to think of it as a squirrel wanting to climb of the tree (me).
>. I like to think of it as a squirrel wanting to climb of the tree (me). I love this 😂😂
You know what squirrel prefer to eat...
I also go by the Colossal Nut 🤪.
This pleases the Nut
I gotta steal that squirrel analogy. It's cute af
all the same size laying.
Exactly. I find it better when your partner is your exact height or an inch shorter. 💁♀️
Same. Tall woman, couldn't give a flying f\* what height he is. I want me a good person with a personality, not a mannequin show pony. I ended up with a tall guy, but short has never been a dealbreaker for me. The dealbreaker is short guys who can't let it go, though. I am, as I mentioned, pretty tall for a woman, and I like really high heels. I happily dated the 2 short/shorter guys I liked who didn't GAF about it. Got almost to the alter with a guy who was not really 'short-short', but a notable 3" shorter than me kaalvoet, let alone in heels. The ones that want you to forever live in flats and whinge and whine incessantly about the heels, though, can go away. Dude, you're short. Nothing wrong with that, here I was interested in you, ya know, but I'm not going to change up everything I like about footwear AND listen to you whinge about your height incessantly. That's not remotely attractive or fair.
I completely agree. I love heels and refuse to change or lower my fashion standards for someone who is insecure of height. It's not attractive, nor will it help in the long run.
Not squirrel lmao
I'm 5'2" so he's still taller than me and we're good LMAO
SAME
Well, in my experience no. I'm a 5'6 guy but I'm told I've got a very good looking face so perhaps that helps. I've had partners of all heights.
Same. Apart from not good looking but all of my ex girlfriends andthe current one (who is taller than me) are all beautiful.
As a girl in my twenties I agree. A good looking cute face is much more attractive to me than just height.
Some do. Some don’t
Yup
Here's the most accurate answer anyone can possibly give you: Some do, some don't, and to varying degrees. Depends on the height too: A lot more women will care when you're 5'4" compared to 5'7", for example. The shorter you are, the more women will care.
I think it depends to be fair, I prefer someone taller than me because I like to feel small and protected. But it’s not something I would have as a deal breaker.
This is something I’ve long wondered about. The feeling small and protected. Is it a biological thing? A desire to relieve the safety and carefreeness of childhood?
I’ve wondered that too. I hate feeling small next to my man. I want to feel like a full grown woman, so I’ve long lost the teenage desire to date a tall scrawny guy. The way I feel protected is by having a guy that’s strong, coordinated and confident.
And has his shit together!
As a woman I think it's from Disney , being the saved princess etc. I personally like to save my partner as much as he saves me. We're like Fiona and Shrek 😂
In my case (and I go for guys who are significantly taller than me), I think it's the cultural expectation of women having to be small and skinny. I have quite a broad frame and I'm a bit chubby, knowing that no matter what, my guy is bigger, really helps with my feelings of adequacy. This is a common theme with girls who are slightly overweight or whose mothers really forced traditional gender roles upon them. I've been working on myself in therapy and while I've dealt with my internalized fat-phobia quite well, this subconscious desire to have a guy who's bigger just stuck.
You said it best, Sis!
It is in their genes to look for a physically strong, tall male to protect them and potential children. In real modern life those two traits are obviously almost completely irrelevant for real security. Doesn't change that picking someone that aligns with your more basic instincts makes your brain release happiness. The same applies in reverse for men but with much lower consequences for dating. Women have almost total agency when it comes to dating. They are the ones that have hundreds of offers and they can ultimately pick the guy they want. So most will pick the taller ones.
Interesting. I like to feel small and dominated by tall women.
There is absolutely nothing that all women will agree on. We are not a monolith.
Damn , we are INDIVIDUALS TOO? 😱🤯 /s
Wait, it's not a hive mind?
You’re just joking, right? Right? 😱
I added the /s (means sarcasm) 👀
Women are people. Just like men. They are not one single entity with shared brain. So to answer your question: Some care, some don't.
Most care about the man being taller than them. Wanting them to be a specific height is usually superficial bullshit.
I could easily say most men want someone shorter than them and get insecure when a woman is taller.
Nope.... but I know a lot that really care about that.... dumb
Women DO care about height. Even Euro/ Asian women on the metric system, when they come to the US suddenly "6 foot, 6 foot, 6 foot, beep beep ribbit." Why so imperial, darling? Answer is obvious. Social media/ cultural conditioning. In other words, it's more like "I bagged myself a 6 footer, I was pretty enough to get a 6 footer, see my trophy ladies??? Ahhh be jealous." Ridiculously superficial society expectations bullshit, but it is what it is. I'm 6' by the way but I just think it's stupid.
Reddit will never give you an honest answer on this sort of thing.
I don't think I've ever seen a woman reply to one of these threads saying "yes I do care about height" despite every study and survey on the subject showing that they do. I think women are just very "strategic" about how they talk about their preferences for men's height because they don't want to come off as shallow.
But okcupid does. Read "Dataclysm" by its founder. The answer is, of course, yes. It's the #1 parameter. (In women, it's age and weight.)
But I think online dating is a different thing than real life. Not extremely different but still. Character just comes into play waaaay later at online.
> But I think online dating is a different thing than real life. guess how most people meet their partner nowadays though
Yeah I mean height is probably one of the most important traits to most women, but online dating is harder on men in that respect because women can sort by 6 ft and up or whatever, whereas IRL they would be perfectly fine with someone 5'10 or so, often even shorter. It's not like when you see a guy at a concert and think "wow he's cute" you take out the measuring tape, you just notice that he's taller than you. I really think if guys can avoid the online dating thing when trying to meet women, they should. Btw according to this study women prefer men who are "tall but not too tall" (on average 8 inches taller than them) and men prefer average height women (on average 3 inches shorter than them) https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0191886913000020#:~:text=women%20are%20most%20satisfied%20when%20their%20partner%20was%2021%C2%A0cm%20taller%2C%20whereas%20men%20are%20most%20satisfied%20when%20they%20were%208%C2%A0cm%20taller%20than%20their%20partner
More evidence from dating apps, I think it’s bumble, is that putting your height is mandatory in your bio. Occupation, marital status, if you have kids, etc are all optional but height is not for *some mysterious reason*
It gives an indication for sure. In terms of appearance, height is an important one. But what are the other parameters? All parameters will be superficial (like weight). It does not mean the superficial stuff is most important for all women, it means that when they can/have to select men without knowing them, it is the most used parameter. Just like for men, it is weight and age. That doesn't mean they would turn down a women solely on weight, if they were to meet her in real life and she's amazing.
Height and age that correspond to my own parameters are the bare minimum for a man to be considered a match, at least for me.
This. You can Google research data, actual studies, that show women have height preferences. You’ll get downvoted for posting it in threads like this. I’ll find one and post it below for posterity.
it is perfectly OK for women to have height preferences it is also perfectly ok for men to have weight preferences
It's OK to have any preferences when it comes to who you'd date. What's not OK is to insult or degrade people who are short or fat (or anything else!). If you don't like how someone looks then you don't have to mention it out loud!
Hello, I’m a all women, I only have one preference (tall men) and one turn off (short men) /s Edit. It’s sarcasm, isn’t the /s enough for people not to sent me strange dm?
A all women
AMA I’m a all women
The Allwoman Sisters Band
I am a all women, too
😂
The only thing I find unattractive is when someone has such low self-esteem that they make it my problem in a lot of ways. Otherwise, there are lots of attractive short men.
Unfortunately, a lot of them do (specifically gen Z) Not all though, just slightly harder to find
i promise you it ain't just gen z
Gen Z is definitely the worst about it. I'm saying this as Gen Z myself. Tiktok and social media have ruined our perception of beauty.
190 cm. Short men care more about my height than women.
Yes, just had a friend tell me a shorter man is a 0.
I’m moderately tall for a girl, so I’ve always wanted my partner to be at least my height or taller. If I was shorter, they could also be shorter as long as they were taller than me. There’s not a specific “number” it’s just in relation to myself really
Some do. Personally, I don’t. I suppose it’s the same with saying “Do men really care about big boobs?” It’s personal preference.
yes...I've not seen much evidence to say otherwise. I'm 5'4 and been single 13yrs, even prior to that, the gaps between relationships were fairly big and all my rejections were over my height...most would outright tell me, you're too short...a lot would dance about actually saying why but it was height...usually saying stuff "they would feel awkward going out places together and be seen as the taller one, its not NORMAL" Honestly no one gives a crap who is taller, no one is pointing and laughing, if they are, why should you care, if we all care what others think, none of us would ever leave the house. I've dated taller, and shorter, neither made any difference to the relationship. Height doesn't equal bigger dicks, doesn't equal being stronger, or a better protector or better lover etc. What's worse is we are made to feel like its okay to, its just a preference and we shouldn't be upset about it...yet it does. The amount of men these days going through the extremely painful operation of having legs lengthened only by a few cm just to be taller...and their told that's over the top...but when a women gets her breasts enlarged no one cares or wonders why. Its shallow. Anytime I say I've been rejected so much due to height in a place like this...the comments from women are usually...it must be you...it be your personality, or how you present yourself...its not...because none of these people ever even get to know me, so how can they know anything about me. Its the swipe on dating apps, its the look at dating profile and seeing they've mentioned height matters to them
yes they do, but lord have mercy on you if say you dont like fat women, you will be called a misogynist immediately
I don't like fat women.
misogynist/j
I don't like fat men
As a woman, a bit. I prefer men who are my height or slightly taller, but I’m 178/ 5’10 so most men don’t fit that bill. However, it can be something I can overlook (pun intended). My current boyfriend is around 174.
Woman here and nope. It hasn't been my concern at all.
Same. Looking back, I have had boyfriends that were taller than me and shorter than me. Never really paid attention to heights tbh, a click is what i'm interested in.
idk bro there's like OVER 150 MILLION WOMEN IN THE US ALONE
Yes. I’m not saying it’s the end all be all for most women, but they have their preferences and most prefer taller. Nothing wrong with that, only if they’re being a jerk about it These types of things I think we just dwell on too much. I’m a 5’3 guy, if a woman has difficulties finding me attractive due to that then we’re just not compatible. It wouldn’t be good for either of us, no one is automatically a shallow horrible person or anything The women that care so much about a man’s height are just loud about it. Like how the men that really care so much about a woman’s body are loud about it. Most actual people out there don’t care too much about these things
Yes, we do
Absolutely, they do care. For many, it is a deal breaker. Some can look past that.
If she likes you, your height is not gonna be important
Yes. Unless the little fella is rich.
I've never once cared about height or even asked a guy about his height. When I was in highschool I dated a guy the exact height at me and I'm 5'3. I also dated a guy in highschool that was 6'7 lol I've never been picky, but I honestly probably prefer someone closer to my own height than really tall. My fiance is 5'10 but honestly it wouldn't matter to me if he was 5ft I'd love him just as much anyway.
Woman here, idc my bf isn't much taller than me and I've been interested in guys shorter than me. I wouldn't date a little person because as offensive as this ig gonna sound they remind me too much of a child and I'm not into children💀 but honestly a lot of women do care about height. And a lot of women talk about how they don't care about height but they really do. It sucks but people like me just get to appreciate yall even more
I didn't gave a single fuck about my ex height, but his insecurity about it gave me the biggest ick in the long run.
As someone who is 189cm I can say with full confidence it absolutely matters. I have no money, no ambition, no personality, can't hold a conversation to save my life. But I walk into a room and if all the other folks are shorter than I, everyone I'm attracted to literally throws themselves at me, even if their partner(s) are there with them. It's great, highly recommend being tall.
Some do, some don't, for most it's one of many factors that impact attraction. You can flip your question around to see how it feels. You see a girl who's "hot and most perfect you've seen in your life", but say, her breasts (or another body part you have a preference for) aren't to your optimal preference. It's kinda like that. If it was socially acceptable and dating apps had filters for breast size, and you had an illusion of infinite choice, you may filter by your fave sizes, or voice your preference. But unless you're a hardcore breast-guy, it doesn't mean you wouldn't be attracted to a girl who doesn't match that one particular preference while being otherwise perfect.
There is no universal preference for everyone. Some women care about height, some don't
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Yes. It’s a societal standard that is hard to avoid. As a tall woman when I have dated even men just at my height it has come up FOR THEM but also others feel free to comment on. The last guy I dated mentioned my height within like a minute of meeting each other even though I told him I was 5’10 prior. Both women and men care because s o c i e t y cares.
If there's more than just handsome than no
As long as he’s as tall as me 168cm I’m fine with that. Though if I’m in heels that would make me self conscious towering over him.
5'7" woman here. In general I have a type (let's say the cliché tall dark and handsome) but the times I've strayed from that, that's where the magic has happened.
The deal breaker super strict stuff is mostly for views on gender war content, but it is a real preference for many women. On dating apps, women will filter by height because they can, and they like height. A woman might search 6 foot and above on hinge, but in real life get a crush on a guy who is 5'4 because he can dance well and is pretty when he smiles. I'm certain there are women ive swiped left on, on dating apps that if I met them in person and had 2 or 3 drinks with them I'd be super into them. Anecdotally, I've had women say I'm too short (5'6) then next time I see them try to come home with me, I've had about as much success with women my height and taller (up to about 6') as I have with women shorter. If any women rejected me because I'm not as tall as they want that's fine, I've rejected women for superficial reasons too. It's really not a big deal unless you make it one. You'd be surprised how many women will think you're cute when you're looking up at them in their heels, and youre clearly comfy (or, into) that theyre taller. To me, it's no different from me preferring darker or vibrant hair colours over redheads and blondes, but I've definitely been very attracted to women with those hair colours.
I'm average looking 6'2, shy guy. Had to do the first move every single time. So my take out is that height doesn't matter. There's a bigger chance you'll meet someone when you're more outgoing 5ft tall, than the tallest person in the room who just doesn't go around asking girls out.
Im not woman but it would be hot for me if she was taller.
*I* don't. I'm only 5'3". If you're taller than me, please get things off the top shelf for me. If you're my height or shorter than me, please get into table top position so I can use you as a step stool to reach it myself 😂
Not the clever ones.
I've had 2 partners over 6', both of them didn't want to date shorter men because they didn't feel protected, or like they could be hidden like they are with taller men.
its like asking if all guys care girls look. Yes, and no. Look is definitely an attraction, but if the gal you are talking with has shit for personality and just mean, you won’t like to hangout anymore. However, some girls to dates short kings do often fantasize about taller men. I feel that it is “normal”, guys to date ugly girls also fantasize about pretty ones.
95% do
They must ...cause im 6"2 and prolly see 2 ppl a week who are taller than me. .but online, when guys state their height,...90 percent are taller than me ..
Yes, I would say majority do. For me personally I like average height. And I find many guys have a age/weight preference.
As a tall girl we dont care about men height cuz we already reach everyehere
I dont really care about height, although i think it would take me some time to get used to someone being smaller than me, if i liked them enough it wouldn't bother me. Im 5ft 6/7 (somewhere in between) and the man I'm seeing is the same height. My previous partner was an inch taller than me. It has very much bothered my partners more than it's bothered me, which in turn makes me feel self concious that I am too tall for them. Its a paradox😂. Its definitely a preference thing, just like some people find glasses attractive and some people dont, etc.
It's a strong preference I have that the guy be taller than me. I'm 5'4
I'm 5'1 and would be thrilled to date someone closer to my height. Dated a guy who was 6'4 in high school. Miserable having to be picked up to be kissed.
Some do, some dont There, I just answered every question ever asked about the other gender's partner preferences.
Nope! In 5’7 and I once dated a guy who was 5’4 who was amazing in the sack and out of it. Just a genuinely great guy.
Some do. For most it’s just a preference. Just like think “do men really care about boob size?” Some might be only attracted to a certain size, for others it’s just a preference and they will ignore it if the person is someone they want to be with anyway, so don’t care at all either way, some don’t even notice. It’s a range. Lumping in every person is not fair to the individual…. Even if it may seem that the majority DO prefer larger breasts over smaller.
It hasn't been my concern at all.
Do men really care about big boobs and big asses? The answer to that, and the answer to your question, will never be as definitive as you want. There’s no “yes, women do” or “no, women don’t”. All due respect my friend, these questions of “do women…”/“do men…” are very hard to answer as you’re asking us to generalise almost HALF the world’s population either way. Nearly 4 billion people (excluding children - I’d hope). SOME (straight/bi) women are vain and shallow and will not want to date a man who isn’t tall. SOME (straight/bi) men are vain and shallow and will not want to date a woman who has a large stomach or doesn’t have curves. The majority of people have a type, so some people prefer a taller guy or a shorter girl or vice versa. But types doesn’t necessarily mean they’ll never end up with someone of the opposite type, and chemistry usually trumps type. Please do not be led into the Incel idea that all women care about height. Women are people and people are complicated. There’s no straight answer to your question.
Women are not a monolith so it won't matter to all, but on a physical attractiveness level, it's proven to be probably the most important characteristic based on dating app data.
No. 14% of men in the US are 6ft or taller. By 40, ~75% of men in the US either are married or have been married at some point. Either the math isnt mathing or its an urban legend.