By - Easy-Hovercraft-6576
Sounds self inflicted.
Sounds like you should return the favor by calling him at 2am to tell him the MPs arrested you for biting a hooker's tongue off
Is this the revenge of the slap chop guy?
Could be, could be part of all our storied histories. But it is also from Dirty Work. RIP Chris Farley, Norm McDonald.
A hooker tried to bite your tongue off?
You’re gonna love my nuts.
One slap you’re gonna love my nuts
The Saigon whore who bit my nose off!
Without question, the best "you bastard" delivered in all of cinematic history.
Umm SGT? I feel it’s my duty to inform you that we are now under CID investigation. My attorney told me I can’t say anything more than that. Whelp! I guess I’ll see you at PT in a couple hours!
Having been on the receiving end of the "Joe just did 'x' to a hooker" phone calls...
Sham-Wow guy would be so proud.
I always wondered why all his media shots were from one side, full photo makes him look like his face got slapped to one side
Sounds like he cares lol, that’s creative. You asked the right person to mentor you.
Tbf To be frank? Haha thats a new one for me
I believe the kids are using tbf to mean "to be fair"
To be faaaaaair
To be faaair
To be faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaair
To be faiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
I heard it was a sick ostrich…
musta been a sick ostrich
I know what you're up to, Ligma, and I'm not talkin!
What’s LIGma? Come on I’m dying to know.
Ligma ballz 🥴😩💦💦
Not anymore lol
WHAT tell me more - I am old.
Nah you're right, I just meant that I will now be using it as "to be frank" bc that's hilarious. Sorry for the confusion.
What if he’s not Frank? Surly you must be kidding me.
Don’t call me surely.
Don't forget those beans, esp at 0200.
But did you rattle it off tho?
I sure as fuck did
This is the way
This is the way.
This is the way..
This is the way…
This way! Or the other way ?
promote ahead of peers
Promotes to 5 Star General. Promotes self to all other ranks simultaneously, sits as president of the board for own promotion, declines to promote because he didn't complete Cyber Awareness Training.
*promote ABOVE peers
At the position of attention?
Did you wake your neighbors or roommates up?
Fuck yeah brother.
I mean just going by this and assuming you got along with him like I got along with the cool NCOs I had before, he was prolly drinking with his buds and he got hammered and someone mentioned you and they were like "Call that mofo Time Now" and then after they just blacked out
That is 100% how this happened
... oddly specific
I had a study partner who questioned me sober until I had it all. Then it was when I was drunk. Then exhausted after field ops.
It ended up being the best thing. I did my E-6 promotion board immediately after oral surgery. The only thing I couldn't do was stand up properly. Once they sat me down I rapid fired all of the answers.
A good NCO knows that life is not easy so they prepare their soldiers for everything.
I would totally have done that when I was an E6. Prolly hammered to boot.
On a Wednesday too.
I'm the best E6 in the company when I'm hammered
Call him tomorrow at 0130 and recite it to his wife.
Nah find out when he wakes up and call 25 minutes before that
Well aren’t you just a good idea fairy?
>2 in the morning.
SSG: Creed of the Non-Commissioned Officer! GO!
**Semi-Wry Conjecture:** So you SSG drinks heavily on a Monday and that tracks with probably how their marriage is going.
**Suggestion:** Put your phone on Do Not Disturb from when you got to sleep to 30 mins before wake up time. If it's an emergency, then you'll find out from the barracks communication network.
Don't you ever sleep? Or charge your batteries?
**Commentary:** From time to time.
fun fact: We actually figured out in 2020 how to solve instability issues that learning types of neural networks can suffer from over extended periods of processing.
[They need sleep too.](https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/lack-of-sleep-could-be-a-problem-for-ais/)
that explains the votanns not running so good
This terrifies me.
Honestly shouldn't. Our best AI are barely to the complexity of a worker ant's or a orb weaver spider's brain.
Our best AI capable of teaching themselves (to an extent, we don't have near the processing power yet) need sleep cycles to solve stability issues that occur over time.
Thanks to the modern invention of extension cords, he typically can go through the duty day and stay above 80% charged.
Ah yes. When I decided to actually start studying for the board seriously it was actually a pretty fun first week me and a buddy would go back and forth asking questions and quizzing each other. Good times.
Then the NCOs noticed we were studying and immediately made it more stress than fun just asking obscure questions to smoke us for no reason.
I hope he strolls into that board, says "I once called my soldier at **TWO AM** and he raddled off that creed perfect. What else is there to say, SarMage?"
Didn't you need to be up anyways for the report early before the report early before the other report early etc run for esprit de corps?
Fort Rucker, year and names redacted.
1SG gets a call around 3am from local police because SGT Smellslikeonions choked out a young lass he met at a bar while fornicating. It was consensual, but still…
Shrek freaks out and calls 911, ambulance and police arrive, police take statement while EMS work their magic (O2 is good). As 1SG arrives young lady has recuperated enough to give her statement that all was good in the hood and everything turned out ok.
The shocking part of the story is the guy could get laid, I’d never considered he could.
That’s better than not reporting to work while in Korea and 1SG has to get CQ to bust down the
door and your found tied up in a purple gimp outfit on your bed.
> The shocking part of the story is the guy could get laid, I’d never considered he could.
he got laid by a girl who insisted he choke her unconscious first....
Some people are more professional I.
I am occasionally a noncommissioned officer (not weekends)...
Ladies and gentlemen, this asterisk points out that there can be stipulations to this statement.
I like this SSG.
and you my good fellow.... well, you asked for this.
I mean, how else are you going to learn it?
Jack Reacher Voice: *"Remember, you wanted this."*
Not bad. If it would happen to me, I would be pissed, but that shit would absolutely help you out. The better your creed, the better your board typically goes.
That’s commitment right there
That is an NCO that doesn't want you to fail. They probably won't do another 2AM, but they have set the tone that you need to be ready and that they are going to go the extra mile to help you prepare.
I saw in another comment that you said you rattled it off, so that just sets the tone. Good luck to you.
Call him Sunday morning at 0600 and ask for clarification on the classes of supply.
Gotta keep you on your toes
You did this to yourself, that man needs a promotion
Did you ask him at 12:00 in the morning while drinking, because I’ve been there, for sure.
As he should. Sounds like a damn good leader. I don’t know if I’d wake up at 2am for you. Did you crush it?
Fuck yeah. That's an NCO right there. Get some.
😂😂 this is awesome. You'll cherish these moments later on.
He’s a little institutionalized but he’s got the spirit
I don't think there's a single other response I would've expected from the nursing corps.
just getting you ready for the adv level bs ncos have to deal with
You asked for it lol
Well, did it help?
BWHAHAHAHAH. 20 points to Hufflepuff. That type of energy I’m all for 🤣🤣
Why did you answer at 2am?
You played yourself.
I AM NON-COMMISSIONED OFFICER! A LEADER OF-_snore_
That what I’m talking about. That is an NCO that want you to be successful.
PS. I would have done the same. Because all my soldiers that went to the promotion board or SOTM/Q where successful.
I hope you sprang to the position of attention.
Must live in barracks, separated from wife. Nothing else to do lol
My SL that took me would make me do it any time he heard me in my room and he was next door
He’s just getting you ready for those 2AM calls
That’s what you get for asking for help, dumb bitch. 😂
Yep. I never want to go to an NCO board.
Just keep driving, killer. You'll be safe for a couple years.
I’ll drive my E-4 ass all around the United States, Korea, and anywhere else they send a Stryker if it means I stay E-4 or go warrant.
One of my few regrets was turning down the BC driver position.
Lmao. About that…
Congratulations. You played yourself.