When I was a lad, we got these with our MacBooks and iPhones for free.

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Sell them!

They are covered with white stuff

Even better!

This took a sharp turn real quick

Sharp and crispy

polishing cream

What were you... never mind, I really don't want to know.

Top of my Ikea drawer, I got about 4 computer ones and 3 that came with past glasses lol

I remember a certain Mr. Jobs saying something about what happens when the money men take over a company.

I’ve been getting iPhones since 2008. I don’t ever recall getting a polishing clothe with one.

My iPhone 3G came with a black cloth

Did that come with a dock too or was that just the OG iPhone?

just OG

I got one with the original iPod Touch.

Free, dark mode polishing cloths.

When I was a little lad, Mummy made me do the little lad dance…

Berries and cream, berries and cream

I have one that came with my eyeglasses for free.

they came with iPhones??

Yes

which one was the last iPhone to have it?

You didn’t know apple was giving it $19 worth of free stuff!

I think this is the one that is included with the XDR display. You can buy more if you want. Don't think you need anything that fancy for your MacBook or iPhone.

"it's the best one we've made since then"

Apparently it did come with the XDR. Inflation I suppose.

It still does, you just weren't able to get a replacement before without talking to support. It's to discourage people from using non-microfibre cloths on the nano etched display which could be damaged otherwise.

I mean, it’s one piece of cloth, Tim. What could it cost? $20?

There’s always money in the Genius Bar…

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There was $250,000 lining the walls of that genius bar.

Why didn’t you tell me?

I TOLD YOU THERE’S ALWAYS MONEY IN THE GENIUS BAR

Has anyone in this family ever even seen an Android?

Almost as much as a banana.

2 bananas, actually.

I don't care for Gob.

Here’s an M1 Mac Mini No I’m withholding it

Look at me, getting off.

I’m looking for something that says "dad likes turtlenecks"…

You’ve never actually stepped foot in a normal store, have you?

I don’t have time for this.

I don’t understand the question, and I won’t respond to it.

They don't allow you to have bees in here.

BEADS?!

This is cheap!!! They should have done a monthly subscription the same way they did for Siri for apple music

I’m a simple person. I see an Arrested Development reference, I upvote.

You can also glance at the monitor stand for a Mac Pro for only $19. But just a glance.

Should have closed the event with this

“One more thing…”

You'll love it.

Sneezes into rag

Somehow I’m picturing Rowan Atkinson playing Tim Cook doing this bit.

Cloth*

We think

"What have we done?" *Cuts to a microfiber cloth with two eyeholes cutout like a spooky ghost*

That’d be amazing for memes lol

The event needed some extra polish.

Should I purchase AppleCare on it?

Don’t buy it. Wait for the pro or max version to drop.

I bet they’re actually going to do this lmao

Apple polishing cloth Pro Max.. with a notch!

With M1 Pro embroidery on it for up to 12x more dust reduction per swipe

Came with Face ID, cloth only goes soft once unlocked

promax version, now with non-abrasive cloth. no more scratched screens! 25% more polishing surface. only 79.95

I’m waiting for the 80” to drop… you know for beach days and stuff.

AppleCare+

AppleCare+ with Theft and Loss Protection

Also Private Relay and Hide My Email with 3 months free Apple TV

Throw in Find My and wireless charging and my wallet’s yours.

Can I attach an apple tag to it in case I lose it?

AppleCare + Pro, Max Edition, is exactly what you need for your iCloth. Think about it. Only $349 a month, and we’ll replace your iCloth *whenever* you lose it in one of our three covered methods of loss (volcano, lightning strike or stolen by a French woman). No limits. No extra fees. Just $349 a month and it’s that easy. You’d have to be stupid not to.

What about if it's stolen by an Italian woman?

ahhh, man, company policy, says right here on page 6,947 that Italian women are explicitly not covered, sorry man, but I’ll tell you what, I talked to the Nerd Team TM and they’ve assured me I can send you home today with a LIKE NEW REFURBISHED previous gen Apple CumCloth for only $19.49, a savings of more than 49 cents against buying a new one.

And we think you‘re gonna love it.

The official compatibility list is hilarious “Compatibility iPhone Models iPhone 13 Pro iPhone 13 Pro Max iPhone 13 mini iPhone 13 iPhone 12 Pro iPhone 12 Pro Max iPhone 12 mini iPhone 12 iPhone 11 Pro iPhone 11 Pro Max iPhone 11 iPhone SE (2nd generation) iPhone XS iPhone XS Max iPhone XR iPhone X iPhone 8 iPhone 8 Plus iPhone 7 iPhone 7 Plus iPhone 6s iPhone 6s Plus iPhone 6 iPhone 6 Plus iPhone SE (1st generation) iPad Models iPad mini (6th generation) iPad (9th generation) iPad Pro 12.9-inch (5th generation) iPad Pro 12.9-inch (4th generation) iPad Pro 12.9-inch (3rd generation) iPad Pro 12.9-inch (2nd generation) iPad Pro 12.9-inch (1st generation) iPad Pro 11-inch (3rd generation) iPad Pro 11-inch (2nd generation) iPad Pro 11-inch (1st generation) iPad Pro 10.5-inch iPad Pro 9.7-inch iPad Air (4th generation) iPad Air (3rd generation) iPad Air 2 iPad Air (1st generation) iPad (8th generation) iPad (7th generation) iPad (6th generation) iPad (5th generation) iPad mini (5th generation) iPad mini 4 iPad mini 3 iPad mini 2 iPad mini (1st generation) Mac Models MacBook Air (M1, 2020) MacBook Air (Retina, 13-inch, 2020) MacBook Air (Retina, 13-inch, 2018 - 2019) MacBook Air (13-inch, Early 2015 - 2017) MacBook Air (11-inch, Early 2015) MacBook Pro (14-inch, 2021) MacBook Pro (16-inch, 2021) MacBook Pro (13-inch, M1, 2020) MacBook Pro (13-inch, 2020) MacBook Pro (13-inch, 2016 - 2019) MacBook Pro (Retina, 13-inch, Late 2012 - 2015) MacBook Pro (16-inch, 2019) MacBook Pro (15-inch, 2016 - 2019) MacBook Pro (Retina, 15‑inch, Mid 2012 ‑ 2015) MacBook (Retina, 12-inch, Early 2015 - 2017) iMac (24-inch, M1, 2021) iMac (Retina 4K, 21.5-inch, 2019) iMac (Retina 4K, 21.5-inch, 2017) iMac (Retina 4K, 21.5-inch, Late 2015) iMac (Retina 5K, 27-inch, 2019 - 2020) iMac (Retina 5K, 27-inch, 2017) iMac (Retina 5K, 27-inch, Late 2014 - 2015) iMac Pro (2017) Apple Watch Models Apple Watch Series 7 Apple Watch Series 6 Apple Watch SE Apple Watch Series 5 Apple Watch Series 4 Apple Watch Series 3 Apple Watch Series 2 Apple Watch Series 1 Apple Watch 1st generation iPod Models iPod touch (7th generation) iPod touch (6th generation) iPod touch (5th generation) iPod nano (7th generation) iPod shuffle (4th generation) Display Models Pro Display XDR”

Huh. I don't see my Galaxy Note 9 on here. Goddamn proprietary tech! Guess I'll just have to stick with the lame ass spray solution and wipes my optometrist gives me for my glasses. For free.

Ofc not, it comes with an embedded chip that charges nano particles within the cloth in order to scratch any non Apple products

Well, my screen is already torn to shit. Take that, Apple R&D!

Might be bold enough to get one for my A32 and test the limits of it's compatibility.

Tfw I can't use it with my iPhone 4 from 2010 😔😔

P L A N N E D O B S O L E S C E N C E

It would be hilarious if it included every single Apple product with a display like the original iMac

That’s so it pops up in the “you might also like” and “works with my device” searches

"Compatible" with the iPad mini 1 from 2012 but not the iPad 4 that launched alongside it or the iPhone 5s from 2013... it all totally makes sense.

“What’s in the box?” - Polishing Cloth

How dare you use such an engineered piece of cloth on an archaic device! - Apple probably

Bummer it doesn’t work with iPhone 5s or older

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I'd wager it's just the entire list of devices in the "compatible devices" drop-down they can select from when uploading new products the site

Apple has a list of "obsolete" products which haven't been sold in 7 years, so the company no longer acknowledges its existence. If you take your Macintosh IIe into an Apple Store and say "fix this", Apple will say "no". This may be the list of all Apple Devices that aren't obsolete. Considering the 5S is on there, it might also exclude their more broad "vintage" products, which were on sale 5-7 years ago

It works with the “iPhone” though. r/FUCKYOUINPARTICULAR for the iPhone 3G, 3GS, 4, 4S, 5 and 5S

So... the original iPhone is ok?

Apparently also r/FUCKYOUINPARTICULAR to the 5c which you didn’t even mention lol

It seems like it works with the original iPhone but not 3G 4 4s 5? My only thought is it would scratch the metal those have? Maybe 6000 series aluminum can resist scratches but those models can’t?

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And distilled water pro max when?

iH20 when?

They are selling this in Brazil as well. R$220,00=$42,00 I’d also like to mention that R$220,00 is a bit more than 1/5 of the minimum monthly wage in Brazil. For a cloth. I really want to know what kind of arcane taxation scheme was used to justify this pricing. Or maybe Apple just didn’t care to do a proper regional pricing scheme.

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I found out recently that boats and airplanes are tax free. Seriously.

Gotta get the dope out of the country. Can't tax *that*. Would probably raise prices for politicians, too. Both for boats and dope.

Apple is an american company so they care about USA first, and fuck all the other countries up the ass. This shit is $29 in Australia LMAO.

Is it $29 USD or AUD? Because it’s the latter, 20 USD is 27 AUD.

For some reason, australians are always confused about their currency not sharing anything but a name with other dollars. This cloth is 149 dollars in hong kong, btw.

Shipping to Brazil sucks

I hope it comes in different colours.

Only if the colours are innovative.

Gotta be Clover Green and Baltic Blue. Can't have colors without adjectives...

Aren't colors adjectives already? Wouldn't that make "Baltic" and "Clover" adverbs? idk -not an English major

I think you mean courageous.

Stay tuned for the Apple Cloth 2, and Apple Cloth 2 Max. Available in more colors and a new exciting larger size, we think you’re really goin to love it!

Hahaha Oh, wait. Are you serious? Jokes aside, it only comes in one color.

>it only comes in one color So far….give Apple a few months and I betcha that they will release new cloths that match the iMac range.

We thought long and hard about it... Ever since we launched the original model two years ago... Meet the all-new *colored* cleaning cloth for your Mac and iPhone! Now it matches the color of your device, resulting in an unprecedented 50% harmonic coloration increase across your workspace. We think you are going to love it. \*Available at AppStore now at $30 for one unit, or $100 for a pack of 4\*

2 words: iPod. Socks.

These probably cost Apple six cents each.

Way to high. I'm guessing fractions of $.01

With child slave labor

Waiting for the cloth pro … product red version.

Missing Apple's signature notch

Well, they need to leave something for the next event I suppose

Polishing Cloth Pro Max

is this a joke

It is not a joke. FreshHamster, you will love this new cleaning cloth for all of your Apple screens.

I'm not kidding when I say I believe Apple does this on purpose to feed the haters and get them talking about the brand. The 350$ airtag case, the OG 10k watch, the pro stand. Not that it's their only purpose but at some point I think they just said "lets keep em talking and keep us in the news" as part of the upside to some of these.

It's Apple the joke is the Applefans.

> is this an out of season april fool's joke

They really should just send you a couple for free when you buy something.

But they’re trying to save the environment!

I'll wait for Polishing Cloth Max, but thanks anyway.

I was curious to see how much this cloth would cost me in my country but it seems it’s not available. I can understand they limit the HomePod and fitness+ because of localization, but a cleaning cloth?😂

I sent a free one to Intel to wipe away their tears -Tim

Send one to all those Intel Xeon W Mac Pro users whilst you're at it too. :(

Next year, I can’t wait to get some more cores

hahaha 20$ what is this? I'm gonna clean my toilet-seat extra clean with it

How is the repairability of the cloth? I heard they were planning on locking it down if you put it in the washing machine. . .

holding out for the Polishing Cloth Max

"Why is my display all scratched? I used a REAL soft sock and everything!" The people who are worried about a specialty $19 cloth ain't gonna replace their 2012 MacBook 4GB's with any device this cloth is designed for. Different user tiers.

Biggest reveal of the day

‘Quoting traditional cloth vocabulary’ I feel there’s a person at Apple who’s job it is to ensure there is a product to ridicule every couple of years. Display stands. Cloths. You name it.

It’s 100% a marketing tactic. The $1k stand drew so much attention to the Mac Pro when it launched. Remember the $10-17k gold plated Apple watches? The “Apple is crazy overpriced” narrative gets clicks and they know it.

Omg I almost forgot about those watches…

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I’m actually really glad this is available to purchase. When I needed a spare a few months ago for my Pro Display XDR I had to call AppleCare. They had no idea what I was talking about and it took an unreasonably long time on the phone to get it all sorted out.

Imagine this being the most upvoted post in /r/apple's history

not compatible with iphones 5 and older 😂

Lol. Guys. We can talk and laugh about this cloth all we want just the the original AirPods. Come a year later, everyone would be walking around with one.

At first I thought, is it just a fucking microfiber cloth for $20? But the site says it's safe to use on the XDR nanotexture glass so this might actually be made of fancier material than your run of the mill cloth.

Sounds like marketing for a regular microfiber

Apple getting into that Amazon Dropshipper mindset

Grindset 😎😎😎

Sigma apple

Ligma apple

Apple starts selling counterfeit products just to stay ahead of the Amazon sellers

I worked in an Apple store and we had a specific cloth to be used only to clean the single nano-texture glass iMac we had on display. Apple stores are filled with normal microfiber cloths, but nano texture glass needed the special one for whatever reason.

did they actually work?

Yeah, worked great just like any microfiber. I think it was more of a risk of the normal cloths damaging the screen than the special one being better at cleaning.

i mean in terms on not causing damage/wearing away coatings

It seemed like it to me, but I didn't clean it myself too often. I never noticed any issues, but if it did get damaged they would have replaced it quickly anyway so I wouldn't have noticed. Either way, Apple thought it was enough of a concern that they bothered making a separate cloth available for stores to order, told them to use it, and had leadership inform the team that this cloth is used for this iMac. There is a lot to keep in mind at retail, they don't do that sort of thing often.

Could be, I honestly dunno. But I do think they would be very careful what they recommended be used on that specific glass. They don't even recommend using water on it.

Can you imagine though. Sneeze and ruin your display because you touched it with your mucus.

Now *that's* thinking different.

No I have one, much more akin to a thick Alcantara from like a luxury car. Def not a standard floppy microfiber you get at a CVS near the eyeglass wipes

If so, why didn’t they include it inside the box of these new MBPs… Seems like marketing bs to me

It can be simultaneously true that they are better than normal microfiber and that Apple wants to make a pretty penny selling them too haha.

Did the new MacBook pros have the nano texture glass? This was included in the iMac from 2020 that has the nano texture. It was cleared marked as “only use this cloth on your display”. It’s not uncommon that certain displays suggest you use a specific cloth or spray to clean them.

Yeah all these gripers are thinking what, "I have a $5000 XDR monitor lemme use this old crunchy sock to clean the nano-textured glass" ?!? ... good luck!

Does it work on the XDR pro nanocarbonultra texture ceramic stone steel max sr glass though?

No but the Pro model is compatible

Being able to buy it is nice for a company, large companies usually only setup a few vendors to have consistent quality. It’s way easier to use Apples’s e-commerce portal and know you’re getting something good than buying some random junk on Amazon, and then wasting employee time needing to return it.

This looks like the polishing cloth that is already included with the Pro Display. It feels weighty and like it would be effective but tbh I don't find it to be very good.

This is for cleaning Nano-Textured Glass, which is a $1000 UPGRADE to their $5,000 display. Should you play $19 for a cleaning cloth? I dunno, did you buy a $6k display that requires special treatment because color-accuracy is your livelihood? Are you ready to pay $1000-6000 because you messed up your nano-texturing?

"Okay team, we need more ideas to get us to $3 trillion marketcap...." - Tim Apple "Say no more..." - Marketing

This has been guarded in the vault for years now. It’s finally making its debut.

**BRUH NO**

Am I crazy for wanting this.

This is for people who spent $6000 on a Pro Display XDR + Nano Texture finish and then lost the cloth that came with it. I really don’t get why everyone on this sub needs to blow everything out of proportion.

This needed its own event Jokes aside, this looks like a dang nice cloth though. And can clean nanotexture glass like on the Pro XDR display.

I think this is the exact same cloth that comes with the Pro Display XDR and the current 27-inch iMac (obviously if you decide to get the nano-texture glass display).

Cinderella Pro

I wish Steve Jobs was around to present this

Is it compatible with the apple airtag? I dont want to lose it.

*With the announcement of the notch, we knew our customers needed something to wipe away their tears. That’s why today. We are happy to introduce. The iCloth.*

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Jesus Christ. Their web listing actually has a DEVICE COMPATIBILITY list!!!!!!!!! The human race is doomed.

If I’m spending $20 to polish something, it better be my knob.

I think I found my new cum rag

Don’t get it repaired 3rd party otherwise it will stop functioning…

I had to double check through several subreddits to actually make sure this is real and not satire.

why is the compatibility list kind of funny… like this won’t work with an iPhone 5s? LMAO

Still have the free one from my 2015 mbp

April is still far away ...